Sex Survey Catches Wind Of Hot New Virginity Trend

A long, girthy survey about the sex lives of Americans has revealed that more a quarter of people in their teens and early 20’s have not had sexual contact with anyone. Could this be the death knell of hilarious coming of age movies wherein a group of nerds attempts to get laid?

The survey is the seventh of a series of similar sex inquiries conducted by the Department of Health and Human Services dating back to 1973. About 13,500 randomly selected Americans between the ages of 15 and 44 were asked about their sexual activity, and it turns out that the hottest trend in sex isn’t crazy Cosmo-style scrunchies-around-the-balls shenanigans; it’s keeping your pants on forever. According to the Washington Post:

The latest round of the quaintly named National Survey of Family Growth found that among 15-to-24-year-olds, 29 percent of females and 27 percent of males reported no sexual contact with another person ever – up from the 22 percent of both sexes when the survey was last conducted in 2002.

Perhaps all of those “Don’t have sex, because you will get pregnant, and die” messages are paying off, although it isn’t abstinence-only education that’s making a dent in the number of slutty, slutty sinners in their 20’s. Somehow, the message that young people are getting from comprehensive sexual education is that either that it’s not worth

Perhaps economic factors are at play as well. I moved out of my parents’ house when I turned 18 and was lucky to be employed from the time I graduated from college in the middle of the last decade, but in this shitty economic climate, many recent college grads are forced to forgo the sluttery afforded by living independently in one’s early 20’s when their joblessness necessitates that they move home after graduation. Additionally, high college costs may be driving some college students to live at home and commute to school, eliminating the possibility for sexual exploration within the traditional smelly hedonistic enclave that is the typical college dorm.

Of course, there’s always the possibility that a part of that virgin population aren’t virgins by choice; perhaps huge swaths of young people have deemed themselves unfuckable and just given up.

The study also found that about 40% of Americans have had anal sex and that oral sex isn’t necessary the “gateway fuck” that hand wringing Elisabeth Hasselback types seem to think is bringing America down; many teens stop the progression of their sexual activity with mutual oral sex. (Teenagers: displaying good judgment since… right now?) Continues the WaPo,

Among 15-to-17-year-olds, 7 percent of females and 10 percent of males report having oral sex but no vaginal sex. That fraction, however, declines rapidly among older respondents. In the 20-to-24 age group, only 3 percent of females and 4 percent of males report oral-sex-only activity.

More women than men report same-sex liaisons and men also reported having more sexual partners than women, which indicates to me that perhaps Katy Perry is more of a cultural mouthpiece than we give her credit for.

What say you, readers? Have you noticed an uptick in virginity among your peers? To what do you think this can be attributed?