I think at this point we can all acknowledge that Nine is kind of disappointing and overblown. And yet: the Rome premiere at the Auditorium Conciliazione just made me want to pack up, hop Alitalia and, yes, be Italian.

Sophia Loren: a legend who has earned the right to dress like a drag Big Bird if she wants to. (And she does.)

Marianna Di Martino routs the rules about winter white. Argue with that!

Marion Cotillard looks like she's going to the world's coolest Renaissance Faire.

Francesca Fanti knows that the classics are around for a reason, and that includes bias cuts. Not like I can read her mind.

Shocker, that: Penelope Cruz looks stunning - and can even make beaded satin not feel instantly bridal. Not that this wouldn't be a nice wedding gown. If you're thinking along those lines.

Martina Stella clearly likes Degas. A lot.

Gabriella Sassone does classic Italian widow - well, the musical version.

Chiara Francini just makes me want to change time and be born Italian. No, the details and the Physics and stuff aren't important - but to have a genetic legacy of effortless awesome is pretty enviable.

Monica Scattini exhibits the Italian enthusiasm for fur - but this appears to be vintage, for a change, yes?

And Lola Ponce: an un-self-conscious, sure-enough genuine bombshell!

Leopoldo Mastelloni gives a new meaning to "Fellini-esque."

And, like, how does this pageanty number somehow look so...glam on Alessia Piovan?

Margareth Made: somewhere, YSL is smiling.

[Images via Getty]