On last night's reunion, Teresa was particularly inarticulate ("cleansiness") and absurd, especially when defending her husband's gay slur, saying that a "very gay" friend of theirs said that anyone who took offense to it is stupid.

For more Teresa-isms, check out her Q&A in Newsweek. My fave: "If I knew she would have brought the book I never would have brung my kids."

For someone who didn't really have her own story line during the season, Caroline just wouldn't shut up last night. She totally controlled the room, monopoliizing every conversation, even in response to questions that weren't directed toward her. She talked about the importance of family, and added to the Manzo chorus that Danielle came between Jacqueline and her in-laws, and Dina and her brother, a relationship that Caroline says is still not right.

Danielle said, there had to have been issues in that family before she ever came into their lives, because it doesn't make sense that a group of people who crow about how strong their family is could crumble just because some ex-stripper befriended one of them.


In fact, Jacqueline — who was so full of baby that she was pregnant in her neck, nose, and lips — confirmed that Danielle was not the cause of the family feud. It was also revealed that Jacqueline once punched Caroline in the face as payback for a comment she made about her mothering. That must've been cathartic for her!

Caroline seems like the epitome of the pain in the ass in-law who pokes her nose into everyone's shit and has something to say about it. I pity the women who wind up marrying her sons. She will be the mother-in-law from hell.

Also, the hypocrisy of Caroline was astounding. She judged Danielle for having been a stripper, but everyone thought it was hilarious that her son wants to start a strip club. And, even though she said she didn''t want people to believe things written in the papers about her family's mob connections, she readily judged Danielle in relation to the things written about her in "The Book." (Did you notice how quiet Teresa was during the mob convo? If anything, she's the one — with the husband in "construction "— who should've been answering that question.)

The real meat of the reunion - including what exactly went down behind the scenes with Danielle that made Caroline break down - has been saved for part 2, which airs on Thursday. In fact, last night, Danielle pretty much kept quiet, "silently" hating the other women; I've never seen a Botoxed face capable of so much expression.

‘Jersey' Girl Talk [Newsweek]
Earlier: It's Official: Real Housewives Of New Jersey Has Mob Ties
Sneak Peek: Real Housewives Of New Jersey Reunion