In a Business Week profile by Sheelah Kolhatkar, Biderman advances the extremely plausible argument that although his business model essentially depends on the secrecy and stigma surrounding infidelity, his site also deserves complete mainstream acceptance. Here is his story, told (mostly) in quotes from him.
He is over monogamy.
Monogamy, in my opinion, is a failed experiment.
And yet, Fox News is not. They would not run his Super Bowl commercial. This is the same as sexism.
I think when a landscape is tilted against you like that...isn't that how women the generation before felt when they couldn't get a fair shake in jobs? Because of their gender? It's the same thing. I'm angry because it's not logical.
He is a revolutionary.
I was very confident that men would gravitate towards a service to conduct these otherwise anonymous affairs. They were seemingly doing it already. I was much less confident that women would behave that way. [...] For them to go and have anonymous affairs, I was almost gonna have to create that paradigm.
And yet, he is also inconsequential.
You eradicate Ashley Madison, you're not going to eradicate infidelity. That's what allows me to sleep at night. If you think that all affairs happen on Ashley Madison, you're very naive. The majority happen in the workplace. People are thrust together, that's where they happen.
His business is good for marriage.
Ashley Madison and its clandestine, more transactional approach, he says, is actually a marriage saver, a public service of a kind.
Also for fatties.
You can build a profile right now of an unattractive woman, overweight, whatever, she'll still have a dozen men interested in meeting her.
Women are whores anyway.
On sugar daddy/sugar baby relationships:
Is that any different from any dating scenario? If you take a woman out and buy her a diamond ring and a Valentine's gift — that is how the world works.
Did we mention he is married?
If I woke up and found my partner wasn't interested in being with me sexually and I tried to do everything I could but sex was now off her radar...Well, sex is important in my marriage — it is — but it's not No. 1 and it's not No. 2. So I would stray before I would just leave, because maybe that would give me enough of what I need to stay within my marriage to do all the other things that are critical to me.
His wife kind of wishes she'd married a doctor.
Says Amanda Biderman,
Really, the business itself doesn't match who he is as a person — it's not our lifestyle or value system or any of that. I mean, yeah, I'd love it if he were working on a cure for cancer. But it's a business, and that's how we look at it.
Cheating, Incorporated [Business Week]
Image via Ingvald Kaldhussater/Shutterstock.com