Scandalous Nipple on Sears’ Website Has Unleashed Smut on Innocent Shoppers (NSFW)

Illustration for article titled Scandalous Nipple on Sears’ Website Has Unleashed Smut on Innocent Shoppers (NSFW)

Thanks to America's Puritanically fraught relationship with nipples, Sears has been forced to address public outrage over the fact that an image on its website's Exotic Apparel section that features a model's right nipple clearly visible through the purple mesh "babydoll" slip she's wearing. According to AdRants, pearl-clutching, feather-ruffling organizations such as the American Family Association have exploded like nipple-shy volcanoes (nipples sort of look like little volcanoes, don't they?) and accused Sears of peddling dirty, filthy, nipple-peeping smut, just like the New Yorker.


AdRants' Steve Hall is particularly perplexed by organizations who have deemed Sears' nipple-slip "smut," because even someone with a cursory idea of what mammals are knows that nipples can be super important:

We're not sure when the natural beauty of a woman's nipple became smut but, hey, there will always be a collection of people out there that refuse to believe females have nipples...that actually serve a function in the perpetuation of the human race!

It's true — nipples can be fleshy, life-oozing miracles, but that just doesn't seem to matter to the more modest segments of our population who find themselves innocently browsing through the Exotic Apparel section of Sears' website, you know, minding their own business, when wham!, an erect nipple is pointing straight at them, shaming them for even looking at lingerie models in the first place.

Exposed Nipple Causes Headache For Sears [AdRants]


hockygrrl4 Agent of Chaos

Oh Sears, when will you learn? Years ago, the printed circular came out and one of the male underwear models, resplendent in his tightie whiteys did not make sure that all, er, uh, baggage was properly stowed. Yep. Right there in black and white, Mr. Wee Willie Winky with a tip of the hat to the lady of the house as she casually shopped for Mr. Of the House's drawers. My grandma, a real "pistol" saved the offending ad and would bring it out when she needed to raise an eyebrow or two.