What is it with women who preface statements with "I'm definitely not a feminist"? Now, I personally don't go around calling people I am a feminist, in part because of all those old Candace Bushnell columns in which flimsy freeloading unemployed socialites constantly excuse their unrelenting pursuit of sugardaddiness by saying "I'm a feminist," but that same anecdote goes to show you just how benign the word really is, right? I mean, equal status accorded to men and women — that's a no-brainer, right? Okay, well, now comes Helen Fisher, a renowned anthropologist, Match.com consultant and World Economic Forum speaker on the subject of the differences between women. She starts her speech, "I'm definitely not a feminist..."

And then goes on to basically say men are from Mars and women are from Venus. In brief:


Women are capable of thinking about more things at once and being more emotionally intelligent. Their screenplays are subtler, more ambiguous, and more complex. (Ever tried to get a guy to watch, say, Friends With Money? Yeah.) Years of having do deal with kids and chores and errands and cooking and sewing has evolved us into longer-term thinkers, better "multitaskers", better investors. They like to gather more data before making decisions, whereas men make all their choices as if they're going to die tomorrow.

Men are hunters, focusers, better in the short term, in the moment, more analytical; more direct, less complex, write more plot-driven screenplays.

So far so duh. And guess what? Testosterone is the culprit. How long is your ring finger compared to your index finger, Dr Fisher wants to know. If your ring finger's longer...you're less likely to care think about the long-term impact on the union symbolized by the ring on it before you fuck that cute intern because you've got more testosterone. And if your index finger is longer, the...better to wag it angrily in response?


Hey wait! But Tracie, and Anna and I all have longer ring fingers. Is evolution already working to combat these old stereotypes? (Bc I am the worst multitasker on the universe!)
Whatever. Speaking as a manly girl, I am sick of these studies that so confirm how inherently superior women are to men that you have to preface them by saying, "And I'm in no way telling you this just because I'm a feminist..." We already have to work for their dumb, overconfident, emotionally-stunted, all-trees-no-forest all-gut-no-intuition short term-obsessed "hunter" asses. Fuck spending any more time worrying about their motherfucking pride.

Is Your Ring Finger Long Enough For This Job? [Salon]