On Wednesday's episode of ANTM, the girls packed their bags and went to China. Heather won the first challenge there — doing martial arts poses while suspended in midair — and her prize was a "shopping spree." They gave her like $500 and sent her to what appeared to be a strip mall. Real nice, Bankable Productions. Then the girls filmed Cover Girl commercials for the makeup's "Queen Collection." Don't you just love how the very gay director instructs the girls to find the queen within themselves? He oughta know, I guess. Heather sort of choked, but she's still my fave. Above is a clip of the best Heather moments in the episode, and after the jump, some stills of her being beautiful and using her loveliness.

This must be that "so wrong it's right" thing that noted fashion photographer Nigel Barker is always going on about. I finally get it.

Heather's still not clear on it, though.

She might just need some time to concentrate on the idea, what with the ADD and all.

Just before shooting her commercial, Heather said that she thought she'd make a good Cover Girl because she's "not your typical girlie girl." I do think Heather would make a great Cover Girl, however, it has nothing to do with whether or not she's a girlie girl, or whether or not she's able to recite lines, or whether or not she can even read. Cover Girl just needs to run this before and after:

I'm sold.