Luis Gomez makes us stabby. He began molesting his 9 year-old sister-in-law in 1999, culminating in her rape at the age of 14 in 2003. Despite being convicted by a jury of second-degree rape, second-degree course of sexual conduct against a child, first-degree sexual abuse and endangering the welfare of a child earlier this year, his shitpoke lawyer plans to argue at his sentencing that his client is innocent because the girl documented everything but her long-term abuse in her diary. Yeah, you read that right. His defense is that she bitched about everything other than the fact that he molested her, because, of course, no one would ever document losing their virginity in a diary but not have the words to describe being raped by her brother-in-law just after Thanksgiving. [Times Newsweekly, NY Post]