Spencer Pratt Loves God, Plans To Become President Of United States

Radar runs an interview with The Hills antihero/antichrist Spencer Pratt in its politics issue, because it turns out he would like to be President someday! (In addition to being a billionaire by the age of thirty, which he totally deserves because “managing” the retard career of some retard blond you fucked and forced to get plastic surgery totally falls somewhere on the spectrum of “business visionary” between inventing Google and inventing Facebook.) (Also: Heidi sings “like a Mouseketeer on steroids.”??) You should really read the whole thing, because interviewer (and Page Six Mag editor) Rachel Syme admirably restrained her vomit reflexes long enough to catch gems like “If there is a God, I love God,” and “I’m thinking about ideas that people might think are crazy, and I’m like, this world is crazy, where do you think we are? You want to tell me there’s a planet and there’s a universe, and gravity holding us down? It’s like, okay, I’m crazy then.”

Um, we assume this means Spencer would not be averse to teaching “creationism” in schools? Because his two-year term on reality television has not killed enough American brain cells. We eagerly await your suggestions as to what else might comprise the campaign Prattform. Universal cosmetic surgery benefits, for “confidence” purposes? A public relations campaign to burnish the reputation of the American beef curtains industry?