Presidential candidate Fred Thompson's milfy wife Jeri is interviewed in this week's People on her status as a trophy wife. "I almost think they had to fabricate that trophy-wife stuff because there's nothing interesting to say." Spoken like a bona fide trophy wife! It made us wonder, though: how are the Republicans getting away with this whole "Buy my wife a fancy photo shoot in a glossy magazine in 2008" campaign strategy? How is it that the only thing I have heard Mitt Romney say (without retracting) is the thing about how Ann is his starter wife and trophy wife, "all in one!" (Ha ha, puke.)

Don't they have a party to resuscitate? Shouldn't they at least figure out what say to all the poor people who put them in office because they hated other poor people? Since Hillary is inevitable because the American electorate hates democracy and can't resist a fucking dynasty, shouldn't the likes of People and Bazaar be lavishing attention on people like, I dunno, Hillary? Chelsea? Maybe Doug Band? Or would that just upset the dynasty? Ack, answered our own question again, thanks for listening folks.