A shawl-swaddled Ashley Olsen was the first thing we saw at yesterday's Fashion Week party sponsored by fancy jewelry makers Van Cleef and Arpels, and thank G-D Gawker Media photojournalist Nikola Tamindzic's got instincts like Lohan's got knives: he snapped a pic right away. Before he took off the lenscap! (Doh!) Inside it was pitch-black, full of crazy drunks of all shapes and layers of surgically pulled-back facial skin, and VERY, VERY LOUD. "I couldn't admit this if it was Gawker, but this is kind of fun!" Nikola mused, if it is possible to muse while YELLING. Why so fun? A dancing champagne purveyor sidled up to refill our full glass. "I could have fun in a box," he said. Heh heh! "Go talk to that guy in that LOUD sweater!" Nicola instructed, eyeing a particularly ruddy "image consultant" named Montgomery Frazier. "I wear this shirt because I like to be a TARGET." So you do image consulting for Target? "I mean, I'm not a TERRORIST, but I like to INCITE terrorism," he elaborated, then draped his arm around an unsober-looking fortysomething dame he identified as Emma Snowdon. (Emma SNOWDON... is she a middling reality TV personality?" I asked. (Answer: yes.) "No, SHE is a TERRORIST," he said. "Hahahahahahaha." "So you're big in the Middle EAST?" I asked Snowdon, who replied: "I just had a YEAST infection."

Even more drunkness after the jump and at Ambrel, as usual.