It goes without saying that we try to defend Jessica Simpson in all she does and wears so you knew we were going to take issue with Star magazine's decision to run these side-by-side shots of her now and back in slightly svelter (a word? who cares!) days, especially since you know how we believe on principle that it's just really mean-spirited and toxic to make fun of celebrities who cannot lose weight despite VIP access to cocaine, Rachel Zoe, and all those veterinary drugs that give you the metabolism of a horse. But seriously, guys! We just took some pictures of intern Maria, who has anorexia AND a tapeworm, at the same "after" angle in the above "after" picture of Jessica and we had to get into some crazy, like, tantric Cosmo position to do it! Have you tabloids lost all sense of decency and/or propriety? Any girl looks hippy when shot from the angle of a dirty floor!