Bill Clinton Wears His Mask Like Every Man in a Suburban Grocery Store

Illustration for article titled Bill Clinton Wears His Mask Like Every Man in a Suburban Grocery Store
Image: Handout/Biden Inaugural Committee (Getty Images)

Most people have figured out how to live their lives and wear a mask the way you’re supposed to—covering both the nose and the mouth. Some people have not: Men, mostly, at the grocery store, breathing heavily into their tattered surgical masks, which are pulled down and around their noses, and also, unsurprisingly, Bill Clinton.

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Bill and Hillary Clinton attended the inauguration, walking in looking like they had just had a real big fight in the car, and then milled about the premises until the thing got underway. As I watched CNN, I noticed one thing about Bill, who looked like he didn’t really want to be there: his mask was in danger of slipping off his face, looking much like he was huffing a pair of panties. This is an undignified look for a former President attending this historic event. Also, if men do not learn how to wear masks the right way, I will be forced to engage in the kind of vigilantism that I abhor, running around the quiet streets of Brooklyn telling everyone who is wearing their mask wrong to fix it. Alas, Bill Clinton does not live in Brooklyn, so I can’t do this in person, but I’m sure he reads Jezebel, so if you’re listening, bud, pull that shit up. Thank you!

Senior Writer, Jezebel

DISCUSSION

I don’t leave my house much.  For the first 2 months after the lockdown ended in my area, the only time I left home was to go to the grocery store or drug store.  By myself, meaning I wasn’t talking while wearing my mask.  Everything was fine.  Once I started venturing out more (still socially distanced) and my boyfriend was with me, I noticed that masks that seem to fit well move all over the place when I start talking.  I have a small face so most adult masks are huge and slide down or move up over my eyes when I talk.  Kids masks stay put but don’t cover my chin.  I’ve tried about a dozen brands with not much luck, and most of my buying has been done online because, again, I don’t go out much.