Meghan Markle On the 'Unbearable Agony' Of Miscarriage

Illustration for article titled Meghan Markle On the Unbearable Agony Of Miscarriage
Image: Chris Jackson (Getty Images)

In an essay written for The New York Times published Wednesday, Meghan Markle revealed that she had a miscarriage in July. “Sitting in a hospital bed, watching my husband’s heart break as he tried to hold the shattered pieces of mine,” she writes, “I realized that the only way to begin to heal is to first ask, ‘Are you OK?’”

According to People’s source, Meghan and Harry shared the news with both their families and decided that Thanksgiving’s “time of reflection” would be a good time to go public with their story, speaking openly about their loss in the hopes that it encourages others to feel comfortable doing the same. Markle also references an interview she did with Tom Bradby in South Africa in 2019, during which the journalist asked, “Are you OK?” The question, which resonated with Meghan, drives the second part of her essay, which asks for a tiny nibble of compassion, understanding, and the willingness to literally check in with the people we care about but haven’t seen in a while, to see if they are hanging in there or not—something nice to think about as Thanksgiving beckons.

The holiday “spirit” has “moved” me in such a way that, personally, I will cry if someone looks at me funny, or if the Christmas lights on the streets near my house are particularly twinkly. Here’s what got me today!

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From the Times:

So this Thanksgiving, as we plan for a holiday unlike any before — many of us separated from our loved ones, alone, sick, scared, divided and perhaps struggling to find something, anything, to be grateful for — let us commit to asking others, “Are you OK?” As much as we may disagree, as physically distanced as we may be, the truth is that we are more connected than ever because of all we have individually and collectively endured this year.

We are adjusting to a new normal where faces are concealed by masks, but it’s forcing us to look into one another’s eyes — sometimes filled with warmth, other times with tears. For the first time, in a long time, as human beings, we are really seeing one another.

Yes, OK, sure, I’m an easy sell. Maybe you are too. [New York Times]


Listen, Chris Pine needs to watch his back, because Chris Evans is creeping up to the top of the Hot White Famous Chris pile for me, personally. Here is some video of him wearing a sweater, a baseball hat, and a beard, playing the piano? I didn’t know he could play the piano!!!

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Here are some things that make this hot: the sweater, the beard, a gold chain lurking under the sweater (I think), the dexterity with which he moves those fingers. Tickle THESE ivories, hm, yes, Mr. Evans? No? Not interested? Fair. [Celebitchy]

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  • “The Situation is developing,” says Page Six of this news item re: a baby in utero. I can’t do any better than that. I can’t! [Page Six]
  • Hilary Duff has reunited with her children after quarantining due to possible coronavirus exposure. [E! News]
  • Joe Alwyn is good at piano and helped his girlfriend out. Carry on! [E! News]

Senior Writer, Jezebel

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DISCUSSION

Pro tip: please don’t ask women why they don’t have kids, why they didn’t have more, or if they want more children. I experienced pregnancy loss and only told my immediate family. Since we have a young son, everyone feels entitled to ask me these questions. Since my miscarriage, I fumble through a vague deflection and then find a place to cry. It’s not your right to know, and if a woman wants to share her fertility journey with you, she will.

Really hoping Meghan and Chrissy’s publishing of their stories help change the discourse around pregnancy loss.