New Kids on the Block Are Still Making Obscene Amounts of Money

Photo via Getty
Photo via Getty

I remember scoffing upon the release of New Kids on the Block’s 1990 single “Games,” which opened with the the lines, “Somebody said somebody wouldn’t last too long / Somebody keeps going strong.” It seemed like a rather defensive missive from a group whose 15 minutes of fame were winding down. Well, they sure showed me!

According to a Billboard report, the New Kids’ most recent tour, Total Package, generated over $40 million in revenue. The tour wrapped July 15 in Hollywood, Florida, and featured the Kids performing alongside veteran acts Paula Abdul and Boyz II Men; it moved over half a million tickets across its 48 shows. That means an average of more than 10,000 people per venue showed up to watch these middle-aged men sing songs they’ve been singing since they were actual new kids.

Keep in mind, too, that the group has been reunited for almost 10 years at this point. Their 2008-10 tour, New Kids on the Block Live, generated over $35 million in revenue. Their 2011-12 NKOTBSB tour with Backstreet Boys did over $40 million in 2011 alone. Guess what their 2013 tour did? You’re right, $31.4 million. How about 2015? Another $26.1 million.

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By now the novelty of their reunion has worn off—they’ve been reunited for almost as long as they were together in the first place (1984-1994). People are just really into seeing the New Kids. Over and over. Until someone dies. And even then, they’ll probably still show up until all of us are dead. And then there will be holograms both onstage and in the audience. They used to say that two things will survive the nuclear holocaust: cockroaches and Cher. Well, they didn’t take the remarkable staying power of the New Kids into consideration, now did they?

Let this be a lesson: Never let them call you a has-been, or at the very least, don’t believe them if they do. If the New Kids can come back to such roaring success after being a collective punchline for over a decade, it seems like most anyone can.

Some Pig. Terrific. Radiant. Humble.

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DISCUSSION

HerRoyalRedness

So, not only do they do the tour but they do obscenely expensive meet and greets. You can pay a few thousand for a pic of you with the group or a few hundred for you and 9 other people. And unless you have a group of ten then it’s you and a bunch of randos. Each dude gets two girls next to them in the pictures.

My bestie is a stan and she’s chosen option B every time they do a tour, and she often goes to different cities on the same tour. She’s done it so she can have pics with each guy but that doesn’t always work out. The meet and greet people have nothing to do with setting up the groups, the girls have to do it themselves. We went and saw them in 2014 in Las Vegas for some anniversary thingy and I saw for myself what a shitshow it is. All the girls want Jordan or Joey so they’re fighting over them, then they fight over Donnie, then Jonathan and then the rest are stuck with Danny, sorry Danny but it’s true you’re nobody’s favorite. And it made me so glad I wasn’t doing it. After 30 minutes of that shit where people weren’t getting anywhere I peaced out and went back to the casino.

Anyway yeah my bestie is a stan and I’m a stan by proxy because she wants company and always pays for the tix. I’ve seen them every tour since they reunited, except for this most recent one because I moved before the show in Atlanta. The NKOTBSB shows were amazing, and I loved Boyz II Men.

We’ve also seen Jordan solo twice (he was so sleazy it killed the crush I’d had on him since 6th grade), a play Joey did in Boston and a Danny solo show. When she stans she goes all out!