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You're young. You're fabulous. But above all, you're aspirational. Why content yourself with reading the book, or just seeing the movie. Now you can wear

the dream too! Of course, it's not Prada, dumbass, and Anna Wintour would shrivel into herself with disgust and horror if you ever came within ten feet of her with any of the aforementioned items, but hey, you're fat and poor so this is the best you can do.

Alternatively, go for this. It features "a sterling silver devil with a pitchfork, lipstick, and a heel". And tell everyone the 'lipstick' is really the shrivelled penis of the last man who dumped you. Works for me.