13 Things We Learned From The 'Cosmo For Guys' iPad App

As we now know, Cosmopolitan just launched an iPad-only magazine called Cosmo For Guys. It’s like Cosmo, but … uh, for guys. As card-carrying guys ourselves, we took a look and learned a few things.

A special note to our Miami-based readers: Women in South Florida are especially fond of nipple biting.
If you’re in a coffee shop, do NOT click on a “Tap to Hear Sound” button if you’re reading a Cosmo For Guys story entitled “Decode Her Bedroom Sounds.” You will be asked to leave the coffee shop.
It would have been pretty cool to be at the recording session for “Decode Her Bedroom Sounds.”
According to a quiz that we aced, we are excellent at avoiding “Awkward Date Situations.” We beg to differ, Cosmo For Guys.
According to a different quiz that we aced, we know exactly how to dress to impress women. We just choose not to always dress that way.
That said, getting fashion advice from a naked woman isn’t the worst thing in the world.
Ian Somerhalder’s self-satisfied “Ooh, look at me, I’m a handsome vampire!” smirk is never not infuriating.
If you want to get a woman with whom you’re starting to get serious a cool gift that costs a fair amount of money, it should be a Barnes & Noble Nook. Wait … should Cosmo For Guys be saying that on an iPad app?
According to a scientific study, wearing cologne can actually make women think you look better. (That’s still no excuse to bathe in it.—Ed.)
Most dudes agree: The more skin a woman’s bathing suit reveals, the hotter it is. Shocking!
Women like the Gillette Fusion ProGlide razor as much as we do.
“Mix Her a Sexy Elixir” is an excellent headline for a cocktail story.
Cosmo For Guys‘ female advice columnist is way cuter than Cosmo‘s male advice columnist.