10 Things You May Have Missed On TV This Week

Illustration for article titled 10 Things You May Have Missed On TV This Week

In this week's compilation of pop culture crap, Donald Trump is very proud of himself, something happened to Rupert Everett's face, and celebrate the royal wedding with cat food.

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1.) Donald Trump is really proud of himself.
You'd think that when Obama finally released his long-form birth certificate, Trump would've been embarrassed for the way he's behaved and the things he's said. Then again, you should never underestimate how delusional the comb-over set can be.

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Illustration for article titled 10 Things You May Have Missed On TV This Week

2.) What happened to Rupert Everett?
While providing commentary on TLC for the royal wedding, he looked unrecognizable.


3.) Sharon Osbourne was the best royal wedding correspondent.
Working for The Insider all week long, she sat down for high tea at The Dorchester with Piers Morgan where she became disgusted upon hearing Kate and Will's honeymoon plans.

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4.) Royal wedding cat food.
If a cat food is going to sponsor coverage of the royal wedding with a specially-made ad it only makes sense that the brand be Fancy Feast—for such a fancy occasion, when all the cat ladies are watching the ceremony alone at the break of day.

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5.) Real fake diamonds!
Just like Diana's and Kate's, except about $599,980 cheaper. And it comes with a box!? Sold.

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6.) The Countess pisses off a Brit.
The Countess and D.C. Housewife Cat Ommanney joined Andy Cohen for a special royal wedding edition of Watch What Happens last night. But by the end of the episode, Cat had had enough of the Countess' fake nobility.

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7.) Oprah got new sneakers.
They were custom-made for her by Nike, with her name sewn into the tongue. Like Donald Trump, she was very proud and honored.


8.) La Toya will be missed.


9.) Easy feet.
For lazy asses.


10.) "Is your job total bullshit?"
The tension and undercurrent of hate that these two actresses convey in this 1-800-DENTIST commercial makes for one of the realest frenemy portrayals in TV history.

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DISCUSSION

That Fancy Feast ad drives me bananas, because I can't figure out what's going on with the couple's living situation. He meets her parents and the spoiled family Persian and he gets this great idea about how he's going to propose. So he returns home and completely redoes one previously-cluttered room with cat toys and a turfy-looking area rug, and the two of them agree to marry because he bought a $500 kitten and had a tag engraved at PetCo.

Next time we see them, they're either just moving into a new place or just moving out of an old one, because they're eating directly out of takeout containers and using a cardboard box as a makeshift table. Why did he redecorate the kitten room right before they moved out of their (perhaps just his) old place? The obvious answer is that the kitten room is in the house they've just moved into together. But if that were the case, why was the room so full of crap before he started painting? Wouldn't the room have started out empty if the kitten room is in their new place rather than the old one?