<![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers - Jezebel Comments]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers - Jezebel Comments]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @Seeräuber Jenny: Yeah that was my thought as well. I didn't have statistics or anything, but it does seem like this is just another way that women are isolated and oppressed, especially black women.

boring diatribes

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> This is why ppl used to take their moms into their homes after their dad died - or to share money as an extended family - less freedom for the well-off in the fam but more support (and social interaction) for the rellies who would otherwise starve alone.

angrycandy

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> Perfectly depressing news for women, right before Mother's day wknd.

whateverhappened

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> yes, just like many other comments posted here, my mom pretty much fits into these categories. she's worked all her life but does not have a college degree. she grew up during a time when women were not encourage to finish college but just get a job. she's been hustling her ass off now at 55 yrs old doing contract work. the older she gets the more difficult its going to be for her - oh yeah, AND she's african american.

thx alot, american dream.

Friday025

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> I wish I got here earlier.

I'll tell you why these women are in poverty... because they spend all their retirement and savings taking care of their ailing husbands!

My dad, who was self-employed, was so stubborn and bull-headed he wouldn't listen when my mom urged him to get medical insurance, he just figured he'd stay on my mom's plan forever. But when she retires, he'll get kicked off. He didn't even apply of medicare when he was eligible. Plus, in his efforts to save his failing business (thank you NAFTA) he canceled his life and long-term care insurance policies.

Now, he's a diabetic amputee on dialysis 3x a week, and most of my moms income supports both of them. If it wasn't for me, they would have lost their house, car, everything. But guess what? I can't support them forever because MY life has to start sometime, right?

If heaven forbid my dad leaves this earth, my mother will be much poorer than she would have been if he'd just taken the time to prepare for this eventuality (he's been diabetic for about 20 years). Fortunately, I can control my income, so I am preparing to support my mom for the rest of my life. I always remind her, if I worked a regular job with the same pay every week, she'd end up on welfare.

ceejeemcbeegee

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @SarahMC: My brothers friends did this. He is 30 with his own business, a house, and a stock portfolio of DOOM. Yeah, silly him being a plumber.

He jokes, "Every time I walk through your door there is a house payment!"

FatBottomedGirl

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @arodriguez.romero:
Oh, you're welcome, and again, good luck. I was talking about a situation where someone will be able to do the work and fit in (as well as anyone fits in) in either a public school or a highly regarded private school, but is wondering whether going into debt is worth it to attend the latter.

On the web I often read comments in which people adopt a superior attitude towards people with huge student loan debt. (The local state school was fine for me, why don't you crybabies and whiners shut up?) If it was a decent school with a good placement record at the time no one can say that it was a bad decision.

BTW, in anticipation of comments that I'm being overly consumerist: Education is important for many reasons. But if you're a poor, unconnected person who needs good employment to pay back the cost of your education, you need to try to go to a school that is well respected. Especially if you are a minority.

But there are no guarantees: I know plenty of smart, hard working, well-educated, well-credentialed people who aren't doing so well.

Life's a crapshoot -- wish I'd been informed earlier.

Seeräuber Jenny

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> Okay, this is way late in this thread so no one will see it, but I totally bought "The Money Book for the Young, Broke, and Fabulous" by Suze Orman, and it is a great resource. I really highly recommend it. It's targeted at people just like us and it covers everything from managing credit card debt, to credit scores, investing, retirement, and buying a house.

You guys, educating yourself is the only way you can hope to make it. I think that book is a great start. I'm thinking of buying extra copies and giving it to other girlfriends (cos I don't know any guys who give a crap about this stuff).

exelizabeth

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @msAnthrope: yup. Those were basically my father's last words to my mother. He mistook her for his mother.

nyobserver

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @Seeräuber Jenny: thanks for your thoughts. My daughter is considering NYU, and this may or may not be realistic for her. It doesn't help that my husband and I both got grad degrees there. I just wish she would look at our undergrad alma mater, State University of New York.

arodriguez.romero

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> for everyone who is saying that we won't be seeing Social Security money - don't buy into that bullshit! The government keeps caterwauling about how SS is in the dumps, but if you investigate it, it's not. It's a ploy to get the younger generations to disinvest from it, so that when they finally take away the last dregs of SS to pay for another war, we'll all be saying "It was bound to happen anyway."

egged

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @snarkhunting:
The University of Michigan and Boalt Hall (the law school at Berkeley) are the only public schools that I consistently hear are great.

Of course it depends on the field, but I'm talking about schools with national reputations.

Seeräuber Jenny

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> My mom took care of her retirement, and was able to retire young, at 47. She pays for health insurance, and has finished paying off for a place in an assisted living community she can move to when she wants (she'll still have to pay for her food, but the apartment itself is paid for). She also gets part of my grandpa's pension, cause to encourage people to fight in WWII, a lifetime pension when the vets died was promised not only to the widow but it would be transferable to "any unmarried daughters" (sexist, I know) in the case of the widow's death. Due to this pension, her total income is about 150% what mine and my husband's is, so she is fine.

Now, my mother-in-law I worry about. She lives on a fixed income and squanders her money, and she is 16 years older than my mom. She is always getting into debt, and my sister-in-law tends to bail her out of trouble. I'm preparing for the possibility we'll have to help, but I also don't want to enable her like my sister-in-law does, so I am only willing to contribute when she is in a controlled situation, meaning either in a home, or under the care of my sister-in-law and unable to waste money the way she currently does. I don't know.

Jan74

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @boring diatribes:

Considering that African American women have the lowest marriage rates of any group of women in the US -- I think it's 41% -- not good.

Liked the photo illustrating the post.

Seeräuber Jenny

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @myrtlebeachbum: I don't want to glamorize poverty, but I do feel that people in the US have such ridiculous expectations about the amount of space, both housing and land, that one person, or one couple needs. I mean, I want my house and 1 acre too, but after living for a few years in various developing countries, you realize how wealth just leads to ridiculous waste. I've been in countries where everyone brought their own bags to markets, not because it was environmental, but because the society didn't have the money to manufacture a buy bags destined to be used once.

I have the same mixed feelings when I read about fuel prices. It must suck to be an independent trucker now, but when I read about trucking companies making their truckers stay below 62 mph to save gas, I think, damn right, we need to be doing this always.

treecut...will cut a beech

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @Seeräuber Jenny: Actually, it depends on the state school. Some state universities (Ohio State, Penn State, the University of Washington) have the same kinds of name recognition and, often, even better networking than the Ivies or similarly-prestigious schools, especially in parts of the country that aren't the Northeast.

snarkhunting

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @Shawn-Shawn: Amen to that! I tell my students to major in whatever they're passionate about (within reason). Sometimes firms *like* the diversity of a different background. And English can give you a solid grounding in writing, which is so, so important.

Yeah, I'm an English teacher.

But I get the failure thing. I'll be 29 in 10 days. I've been in school for 24 years straight (K-PhD). I haven't finished my degree (a few more months). I rent. I have no boyfriend, kids, anything. I own my car and I have a cat. That is it. I'm never going to be a grown up at this rate.

I prefer Shiraz. Maybe the Jezecommune should be in winery country.

snarkhunting

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @arodriguez.romero:
In regard to the value of private schools, it depends on what you want to do and the quality of the school, but yes, for certain fields it definitely can matter. It's certainly not a golden key, but having a degree from a really good school might be the difference between getting your resume read and having it summarily tossed.

If you have a powerful friend or relative in the business you aspire to enter you can go anywhere.

If you are looking at placement statistics for college or graduate and professional schools, be VERY CRITICAL. Placement offices have been known to distort statistics. Research carefully.

No matter what you do, you'll still be scared sh-tless. That's life.

Look for my other post, also towards the end of this thread.

Good Luck!

Seeräuber Jenny

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @unionmaid: Exactly. There are ways to shore up the other 30% of social security, like taxing income above $94,200. It is in our hands to protect social security, not just for ourselves, but for those who can't afford to put money away for retirement.

Lymed

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @msAnthrope:
It never ends. :-)

Seeräuber Jenny

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @robot ninja spy:
@secretspygirl:

i'm right there with you. a lot of people seem to have their identity wrapped up in their consumer purchases. same way that certain cliques at school dress a particular way. so if you don't have an iPhone or a car you really can't afford or anything that's "this year's model," you're supposed to feel yeah, like you're old and out of it or something.

we shouldn't be surprised. we live in a consumeristic society. and product longevity isn't usually pointed out as a selling point with most things we buy anymore.

msAnthrope

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @boring diatribes: Touche!

Everyone looks like they've bathed in butterscotch pudding. It's not an attractive shade....

Yum, pudding.

rosasparks

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @toothsome:

I just happened to see your comment and am jumping in here, but the truth of the matter is that schools are used in part as screening devices, which is why it does matter where you went if you are applying for a position in a competitive field.

Of course what you learn matters, and occasionally the very best schools dine out on their reputations instead of providing the best teaching. But they can afford to do that because more often than not they admit extraordinarily bright, ambitious students, a number of whom have additional advantages in the form of money and connections.

I know there's an idea that the ordinary state school can compete with the best private schools -- it's not true on any level except price.

Taking out big loans to attend a prestigious school with a good placement record is definitely a risk. But it's an intelligent one.

Seeräuber Jenny

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @SarahMC: "high schools and colleges basically LIE to kids, setting them up for disappointment."

I am going to show this thread to my daughter. She has said "I don't want to work in a cubicle like you mom." She didn't get that idea from me tho.

arodriguez.romero

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @Seeräuber Jenny:

"I read a really depressing article in Slate a while back about a visit to a nursing home. A woman resident told the writer that all older men want is 'a nurse with a purse.' "

haha it sounds like they're regressing and just want their mommy again!

msAnthrope

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @brendastarlet: I've started to take $100 out of my bimonthly paychecks to put into my savings account. I don't eat out or do takeout as often anymore, and feel lucky to have a job, even though it pays $10/hr with no health insurance. I'm glad that my parents are paying for my basement studio apartment in Queens ($825/month) while I can pay my bills. The luxuries I allow myself are a gym membership ($50/month) and going to movies/shows once or twice a month. It's a balance of saving money and building my savings account, looking for jobs that would advance my editorial skills, and enough to pocket for the future while one day being able to take a vacation to some faraway place as a treat and to see new things.

beatrice3000

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @bellethellama: Oh! I think a BIG reason for my feelings of failure is fact that high schools and colleges basically LIE to kids, setting them up for disappointment.
In high school we were all told that as long as we went on to graduate from college, we'd be golden! Then in college, we were told that graduating with a degree from such-and-such program was our ticket to lifelong happiness and instant fame and success. Not in those words, exactly, but they definitely inspired delusions of grandeur that did NOT prepare us for years of data entry, coffee-making and hundreds and hundreds of unanswered job applications.


SarahMC

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @biscuitdoughjones:

I read a really depressing article in Slate a while back about a visit to a nursing home. A woman resident told the writer that all older men want is "a nurse with a purse."

Seeräuber Jenny

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @arodriguez.romero:Agreed!

unionmaid

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @SarahMC: I completely understand! I was at the top of my undergrad program and during the interviewing process senior year, every time I heard someone got a job that I was rejected from, I felt like shit--especially since my parents and professors were all expecting me to just fall into a job. I moved then to CT a few years ago, and when one of my friends at my new job quit for one paying significantly more and at the same time unveiled her gorgeous renovated condo to another friend and I, I really felt like shit. And it's so hard to be patient and wait for your time to come, but you know what? You're intelligent and driven--it will come. And not having it right away will make it so much more meaningful when it does come. In the meantime, however, it completely sucks.

@robot ninja spy: Normalizing luxury via "trading up" and "masstige" is a HUGE culprit in this whole mess.

bellethellama

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @robot ninja spy: Hell YES! You have summed up precisely the way I feel every day. It makes me feel incredibly out of touch with my peer group, and oft labelled an "old lady" by my friends and family. That may be so, but I like having "nice things" and damned if I will purchase a piece of junk that is going to fall apart in a few years, I would rather go without until I find a mint vintage model or save up for a modern quality piece.

See what I mean...?

secretspygirl

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @unionmaid: no apologies necessary. I agree that we need that floor. As for the stock market suggestion, let's just hope it goes away come November.

arodriguez.romero

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @rosasparks: Hm. I guess they want to make sure that we see them, that we really, really see them. Why *not* be orange (my new motto)? Maybe they're worried that their outsides are as transparent as their insides?

boring diatribes

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @arodriguez.romero:I am sorry, I didn't mean you as a person with an agenda, I meant the larger political and media body that constantly spread the story that SS is going to be gone and as a system is doesn't work. It does work as a way to provide a "floor" to try to keep people out of desperate poverty. Does that suck? Absolutely. Do I wish it could do more for elderly people than provide a floor? Sure.

I wasn't trying to imply that all of us shouldn't be planning for a future and one in which we won't be able to rely entirely on SS.

I just think that SS as a government program is really important to protect, especially from those who want it to be switched over to the stock market...

unionmaid

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @robot ninja spy: you make total sense. A couple of years back, I was between jobs (by choice) and living off my f-you money. I totaled up what I needed to live on with just the essentials: mortgage, insurance, car, food, utilities, but no big trips, dinners out, Nordstrom, etc.

I found out I could live on half what I was making before. It wasn't much fun, but it also taught me that there was plenty of room to tighten my belt.

brendastarlet

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @unionmaid: I said it. I haven't got an agenda. I would collect part of my benefits after 2040. I say "we won't see that money" because I hope for the best but plan for the worst.

arodriguez.romero

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @boring diatribes: Still laughing. Yum on the tacos & beer.

PS can someone explain to me why bronzer abuse is so rampant on reality shows? It looks horrifying.

rosasparks

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @msAnthrope: As a deeply frugal woman, I am constantly appalled by the disposability of so many products on the market, particularly technology. As though production companies have assessed that purchasing products of quality and permanence is no longer a priority for today's consumer. As I can afford to, I find myself replacing 20-year-old hand-me-down appliances with high end newer models only to have them break down within a few years.
Then I complain about it, read over what I have written and *feel* like I am in my 70's! Ha!

secretspygirl

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @robot ninja spy: Brava! Makes perfect sense. And I agree completely. My bedroom set is a hand-me-down from my parents that they had for years. It's almost as old as me and holding up just as well!

Thank goodness it's not older than me though. That would just be gross.

lurkystars

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @msAnthrope: I hear you, especially on the disposability thing. I don't consider myself cheap, but I don't believe in buying anything more than once unless it's broken. Most of my furniture is used, but it's all real wood and sturdy. I'd rather have well-made used furniture than any of this fiberboard stuff that costs more that falls apart after a couple of years.

What people don't realize is you can live a pretty decent lifestyle with very little money if you're willing to be patient in getting the things you want and look around. But as much as I love reality TV, I wonder if watching people who do nothing in life live in these fancy places and being inundated with glossy mags and Flip This House is making people feel like they're missing something if they don't have these things, because luxury is normalized now.

I don't know. Does that make sense?

robot ninja spy, of the guild of calamitous intent

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @arodriguez.romero: Grad school.

brendastarlet

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @sanibelly: I'm a late returner to college, and I'm majoring in journalism. Also, brilliant. But I'm an administrative assistant now, which probably will be about the same rate of pay, if not more. I just got to start assisting more and more powerful and well-to-do people, and hopefully, my pay/security will increase commensurately.

lurkystars

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> I apologize for being a whiny little brat in this thread, btw.

SarahMC

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @brendastarlet: that's interesting. Was the ivy for grad school or maybe for the last two years of undergrad?

arodriguez.romero

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> In the early parts of this thread there were a few posters talking about how we will never see social security money which is actually untrue. So much of that information is put out there by those who want to change our system into a massive 401K which will help Wall Street and brokers but will really make everyone's retirement a lot less safe. Below is a statistic about Social Security from the AARP. I am not saying it's perfect but those who stoke the idea that SS is going to be gone in a year have a political agenda and it's not one that includes taking care of old women.

From the AARP:
Social Security is in no immediate danger of going "broke." With the retirement of the boomers on the horizon, Social Security began to build a cushion to see us through their retirement years. Because of that planning, the Social Security Trust Funds hold over $1.5 trillion in U.S. Treasury bonds and earn interest every year.

Without any changes, Social Security will be able to pay 100% of benefits until 2040 and over 70% of promised benefits after that. Only paying 70% of promised benefits, however, is not acceptable.


unionmaid

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @SarahMC: I have a similar problem at work. I spend all my time noticing who is brilliant and insightful and who produces elegant solutions. I imagine that I never do.

But, this is a problem in my head, and does not extend into the real world.

You hear it all the time on this site but I will repeat it. You are brilliant. Your comments are worth reading. These are really valuable things. No moping.

arodriguez.romero

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @SarahMC: Ditto to all of that. It's hard not to compare when it seems like everything is just easier for those around you. I used to think I took a wrong turn, but now I think I took tons of tiny wrong turns that have led to this feeling that I'm behind. It's hard when you feel that working so hard in HS and college will lead to this huge success party when you're done, but when you're actually trying to make a life for yourself, there are so many other disadvantages you had no control over from the start.

I probably could've stopped at "ditto."

boring diatribes

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> I plan on spending my final years locked up in jail. It's a hell of a lot cheaper than a retirement home.

BicSharpie

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @arodriguez.romero: I went to both a public college and an Ivy League one. I got scholarships to both and only paid for room and board and extras (meaning I worked.) I will be honest, I thought my Ivy degree was more valuable: the professors were top notch, the students were smart, I loved being on the east coast, and it was just a better-quality experience all around.

But I got it essentially for free and I know I am very, very lucky. If I were still in debt from it, I might not feel the same way.

brendastarlet

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @tscheese: Okay, I'm not West Indian so I don't know how to spell it, but maybe we can all get together and su-su* (sp?) for beer/wine/liquor. I stock up on the $3 bottles of Trader Joe's wine when I can.

*pool resources

robot ninja spy, of the guild of calamitous intent

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @bellethellama: Right. [Personal anecdote ahead]
It's almost impossible for me *not* to compare myself to my peers. I was arguably the "smartest" and most naturally gifted among my (very smart and motivated) high school friends. We were involved in everything at school, in all the upper-level classes, came from good families, etc., etc. I went on to a private, more prestigious university whilst my friends mostly went to big state schools or smaller public colleges.
Well at this point one is living and working in NYC, has a huge circle of friends, and takes frequent trips abroad (by herself, no less) for fun.
Another just bought a house all by herself and just started grad school.
It's sort of the same deal with my college friends. I have a real problem with comparing myself to others and feeling all mopey about my relative success or lack thereof.





SarahMC

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @myrtlebeachbum:

no you're right about the "conservationsim" mentality, a lot of people would say that's because your grandparents lived through the Depression and saw firsthand what it's like to have nothing, so they developed such a frugal lifestyle. and they passed these values on to their kids.

don't know if the Depression really is the driving factor in that way of life. but i do agree that people today buy right into the disposability of everything. nothing needs to be saved or fixed. everything can be thrown away to get something newer and better.

also to blame for this disposable mentality is the amount of technical innovation making possible for dozens of new competing products to pop on shelves every month. people get into "needing" the latest cellphone | ipod | etc.

msAnthrope

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> My mother lives in rural lower Delaware, and save for the summer months when there are tons of people visiting the beaches, there are few jobs.

My mother is not technically skilled, or specifically trained in anything, so like most of the older women she works in an outlet. My mother has savings, but most of the women she works with do not, and with very few customers and cut back hours and pay barely above minimum wage everyone is really struggling. I mean, like getting evicted / can't pay for the gas to drive car to be repaired/etc. kind of struggling.

Ugh.

caseynissa

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @Shawn-Shawn: Same here. I majored in Theatre. I figured if most people weren't working in the field they majored in anyway, I might as well enjoy those four years.

It would've really sucked to have a miserable college life studying something I hated, and then go into a life doing the opposite of what I wanted professionally.

robot ninja spy, of the guild of calamitous intent

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @SarahMC: The Beaujolais this year is delicious!

rosasparks

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @myrtlebeachbum: drying your clothes on the line is good for the clothes and the environment. I'll bet if you told them that Leo DiCaprio does it, they'd fall in line. (No pun intended.)

brendastarlet

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @TipsyRussell: I feel like I'm not going to be able to afford my own place until I'm too old to enjoy it. I, too, am in NYC, and wondering when I can start drinking.

I feel like there really needs to be an NYC Jezebel Commune now.

tscheese

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @tscheese: I find that it's so difficult to not feel like a failure when you're surrounded by colleagues (especially if they are the same age as you or worse, younger) who seemingly are just rocketing up and up at a faster pace than you are. I'm so grateful that I don't live where I work, because being surrounded by grad students living on much less than me keeps me grounded and focused on the good things in life that aren't money-related, rather than constantly worrying about my perceived level of success/fabulousness/etc. from my peers.

bellethellama

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @brendastarlet: I don't think otherwise. I just don't know these folks up close and personal b/c I live in Mt. Stepford with people who would never, ever dry their clothes outside on the line, even if it means driving their Escalade to the mall to finance a dryer at Sears.

Agreed that some people live way above their means. Agreed that some people don't save b/c they can't. Granny just wanted to shake her fist at kids today, that's all.

myrtlebeachbum

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> My major = Social work. Yes. I am a genius. I'm working fervently on the back-up plans.

sanibelly

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @Shawn-Shawn: You know that my dead-mom sestina was my Everest. I will touch sestinas no more! Haikus forever! Especially ones about being poor--I've learned today that I really like those.

boring diatribes

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @SarahMC: Have you heard about these support networks for oldsters that are springing up in places like Boston? You pay modest dues and the members keep track of each other, in case somebody falls ill and can't fend for themselves. It allows them to stay out of the assisted living/nursing home trap.

I think we should form a Jezebel one. I'll be a charter member.

brendastarlet

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @boring diatribes: Weaved and bronzed ladies increase your self-esteem? Well, I'm guessing that's how we became friends.

Shawn-Shawn

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @tscheese: I'm in the same boat. Drinking and going out here is just ridiculously expensive. I feel like I came to New York with these expectations that at this point seem impossible to meet. I have two roommates and a decent job and am still JUST getting by. I bought a purse this week and I've been AGONIZING over the cost all week. It came from Daffy's so it's not like it cost a huge fortune (admittedly, it was one of the pricier purses at Daffy's). I too am the 'den mother' for our apartment. I buy the paper towels and dish soap, and I'm the only one that has ever changed a lightbulb. None of us really like our landlord, but when something goes wrong, nobody else will bother to call him. I have no idea where I was headed with this, but I guess I guess I just feel that at 28 I should at least be able to afford my own place! 11 AM is a perfectly acceptable happy hour, right?

TipsyRussell

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @SarahMC: Yes! I was like the Great White Hope for my family. You're so smart! Go to a good school! I don't hold anything against public universities (I went to a fancy one first, right now I'm at a private and am switching to public again) but I didn't really turn out as intelligent as I was supposed to, and eekingly getting accepted to good schools felt good. But now I'll take whatever education I can get for cheap and make the most of it.

sanibelly

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @tscheese
I meant you & I are dorks together. I also really like watching anything related to history.

I was sucked into watching Clean House for awhile, but then I felt like a jerk, one night, when a gigantic dustbunny, with teeth, blew under the TV while I watched. And the pile of stuff I've said I would EBay looks like a laundry pile.

rosasparks

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @secretspygirl: I was an English major in college as well (with a minor in Creative Writing---clearly I was looking for, um, as much earning potential as possible). My parents pushed me really hard to go into finance or IT, but I was passionate about what I wanted to do and held my ground.

Of course, the irony is that now I do IT/web strategy at a Finance firm, but I don't regret my major. In fact, if I were to do it all over again, I would go the same route. I think that a lot of people assume that your college major has to always translate directly to a specific career, but I think that, in the age of new media, there is so much opportunity for crossover. What matters most is your passion, drive, and fortitude rather than the number of Econ classes you took in college (I took 6 of them, and I can still barely calculate tips).

Shawn-Shawn

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @jezebelacious: Oh they absolutely would say so, and I totally respect them for doing what is necessary to live life on their own terms. It just makes me sad because these wonderful, smart women deserve their golden years to be a bit more golden.

secretspygirl

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @rosasparks: Yes but...how would I increase my ever-fluctuating self-esteem if I didn't watch shows that featured these weaved and bronzed ladies? They are making the world a better place by allowing me to judge them, beer (and probably taco) in hand.

boring diatribes

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @myrtlebeachbum: Oh, there are plenty of people living hand to mouth in this country, hardworking white, black, hispanic, Asian and other folks, and don't think otherwise. What makes me weep are people who cannot afford their lifestyles, but cannot bring themselves to economize. That's why we have the foreclosure crisis.

brendastarlet

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @lurkystars: for real, right? I mean every you need for a middle-class life these days requires massive amounts of debt. and I swear it wasn't that way a decade or so ago.

I went to a state and then a city college, working my way through. It took me 8 years, but no student loan debt. I learned that the earning power of a public university creative writing major in nyc wasn't all that great on its own. So I managed to find my way into tech, moved in with my parents for a few years, and then moved out to a smaller western city where I was certain I'd have tons of money...

And now, 7 years later, I've still got the job. I'm also still renting an apartment and driving a Honda Civic with a dent in the door. At least the car's paid off and I can put some money away every month. Still, I feel like I can't win.

mol666

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @rosasparks: @tscheese: Wow, we are such a bunch of dorks. Which is why I dream of living with y'all on an Old Jezebels commune.

I prefer Beaujolais, btw.

SarahMC

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @rosasparks: It's not "drinking alone" if another physically alive thing is in the house with you, right? Like a goldfish? Houseplant? Unidentified life forms in the back of the fridge? Right?

tscheese

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @SarahMC: No, you have much to show for it: you've had the experience of running a household, both with roomates and now living on your own. Eventually, when you have the money to buy a place (if you decide to go that route), you'll be ready to deal with everything that homeownership brings.

brendastarlet

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @boring diatribes: And this is why I love you. However, I would have preferred a sestina, you lazy, lazy trollop.

Shawn-Shawn

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @rosasparks: I love drinking at home & chillin'. We're dorks together, then.

I also really love prosecco. Cheap & tasty.

rosasparks

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @tscheese: That sounds like a fun night to me! Add in some good TV or a BBC period drama and some yummy homemade food and I'm all in.

bellethellama

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @tscheese: Yeah, I don't think it's too off-topic. I think that's how a lot of people feel these days.

I often wonder what the sociological ramifications of things like this, and the other story about men and women in the workforce are going to have on our culture. Especially relationships and family structure.

robot ninja spy, of the guild of calamitous intent

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @tscheese: @SarahMC: The fact that you can clearly articulate all of this shows that you are not convinced by these arguments. That's why I say that I know you (you too tscheese and my fellow jezebels) don't measure your worth in dollars.

arodriguez.romero

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @msAnthrope: I get that things are more expensive today. But what I'm talking about with these folks (and my in-laws are in their seventies, so I lump them in with my grandparents) is working your way through college, no student loans, living with your parents until you can pay cash for a house, one car per family, going to your neighbors' house to use the phone, never eating out, never vacationing, reusing aluminum foil, picking up junk from the side of the road and using it for something, drying your clothes outside on the line. I don't live this way. I don't know anyone who does. It sounds like poverty to me, but for them, it was a way of life.

Most people's standard of living is a bit higher these days, that's all I'm saying.

myrtlebeachbum

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @TipsyRussell: The Golden Girls had the best set up ever. I have a feeling I'd probably be like Sophia. In fact, I think I have already turned into Sophia.

rosasparks

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @rosasparks: Srsly. I discovered the bar/drinking/clubbing scene when I first moved out here, and I realized quickly how expensive it was.

A snazzy, glitzy evening for me involves a Macbook, Wikipedia, and a bottle of cheap-ass California cab sauvignon. My dork is showing.

tscheese

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> I wonder, to what extent is the availability of open land, in the past, part of our problem? In the US we have had open land plus technology to build houses cheaply for 50 years. So, we developed ideas about how much land a person needs. Now we are running into some limits, and of course the price of housing must rise. Maybe we need to change our ideas about how much space a person needs too.

arodriguez.romero

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @arodriguez.romero: Like I was saying in another thread, I have certain ideas about what constitutes "success," but it is really hard for me to block out the conflicting social messages that one must have a, b, and c material things and have accomplished x, y and z by age suchandsuch in order to be a successful person. Especially when I've been hearing "Ooooh you're so smart; you'll do amazing things!" since childhood. Expectations are just too high, ya know?

SarahMC

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @toothsome: I thought I was the only one! My divorced parents both work in education (dad's a prof, mom's an admin); however, neither thought it was their responsibility to save and/or pay for my college education. Of course, when I was applying for aid they checked my parents income and laughed me out of the office. I completed two years on my own steam, accumulated as little debt as possible because I doubted my degree in English literature would give me the earning power to pay it off in good time. Ultimately, I dropped out because it wasn't worth it. If I could go back and talk to myself after high school, I would say "get a loan, and go into finance".

secretspygirl

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @SarahMC: I feel like a failure too. I know I'm not, but the squeaky-clean American apple-pie "work hard and you'll go anywhere!" mantra DEFINITELY isn't true, and I feel like a real idiot that I ever even imagined it could be the case.

I feel like a failure because I came all the way out here hoping that I could be shiny and awesome and make big bucks in Manhattan, when I'm working harder and making more sacrifices than I ever would if I stayed in the Midwest, and I have less to show for it.

Sorry, I know, ranty, offtopic, but I commiserate.

tscheese

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @boring diatribes: My tears are now from laughing silently. That image is fantastic. I picture a meteor like the one in Flash Gordon, that looked like a disco ball, which some weird goo inside.

You don't deserve it, I never go out, either. I prefer drinking a bottle of rose & watching VH1 Classic than shows with weird chicks with bad weaves & too much lip gloss & bronzer.

rosasparks

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @SarahMC: My fiance is in grad school right now getting his PhD in chemical physics, and at times I think one of his favorite things about going through it is the fact that he has learned how to machine, weld, and blow glass (because in his lab environment if you need something you usually have to build it yourself). As a result, any kids we have will be exposed to this kind of stuff from an early age, and hopefully they'll see it as a viable option in lieu of college.

bellethellama

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @mol666: But equally important. I think it feeds right into the discussion. An excellent point.

lurkystars

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @arodriguez.romero: Thanks! *sigh* This will be my first year paying property tax. I'm horrified.

robot ninja spy, of the guild of calamitous intent

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @TipsyRussell: Ha! My sister and I devised a plan 10 years ago where we would have a bachelorette pad with a bar and fuzzy rugs to bring our gentleman callers back to. We've already picked out furniture. :)

@SarahMC: SAME THING FOR ME. I keep living with these people who don't get that when something breaks down, they can ALSO call the landlord or super. I'm touchy right now. My bathroom ceiling is leaking, and our tub won't drain.

Lady Skittlehattington

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> This is why the Golden Girls had the living arrangement that they had.

TipsyRussell

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @SarahMC: what wait no. You cannot think of yourself as a failure. I know 100% you don't measure your worth in $.

arodriguez.romero

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @robot ninja spy: You should definitely think about nursing school! Now is absolutely the time to get into that field. The medical sector is desperate for nurses, so budding nurses are at a huge advantage when it comes to salary and bonuses.

SarahMC

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @SarahMC:
I hear you - and not to go off on a personal rant, but what scares the shit out of me is the fact that I left my first profession (teaching) and had to use my retirement money to live during law school - so not only have no retirement, but now can't find a legal job! Happy Happy Joy Joy! Happy hour is beginning early today!


MsScarlet

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @robot ninja spy: good luck with your uncle. Virtual hug for you.

arodriguez.romero

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @tscheese: houses didn't cost 10X of one's annual income *ten years ago,* forget about 1950. The loose credit markets in the US over the past decade or so have caused inflation like you wouldn't believe. But maybe that's another topic.

mol666

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @Lady Skittlehattington: There there, sister.
Like I said, I live alone and can barely afford it. I have lived with roommates for years but eventually I just got to my breaking point after ending up the house "mom" every single time, making sure my roomies didn't burn the house down and being the only one who'd ever take the garbage out or buy dishwasher liquid.
It's a trade-off. I definitely feel like a failure, especially since tomorrow I will officially be in my "late 20s" with nothing to show for it.



SarahMC

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @SarahMC: Hell yeah! I had a discussion about that with one of my friends yesterday after reading the story about women having to work the crap jobs while men are being laid off. It can't hurt to have both- the degree and the trade experience.

I might revisit the idea of going to nursing school. We'll always need someone to work at the hospital.

robot ninja spy, of the guild of calamitous intent

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @lurkystars: Of course! EVERYONE can have a 20 y.o. In fact, it might be a good idea to set up a "grandson swap" now.

@biscuitdoughjones:... I think this is a sacrifice we must make. In the name of freedom.

@touchmyshoe: Oh I'm so glad you like the idea. It's a GREAT charity and really gives women agency in their own lives. Glad you are keen on spreading the pregnant cow love...

LaComtesse

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @rosasparks: The fact that I actually watch these shows (because I can't afford to go out...though I should be saving money and not have cable) is more a sign of the apocalypse than anything. I turn on the Hills, and I actually picture a meteor crashing into my apartment. And I'd fucking deserve it.

boring diatribes

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @Lady Skittlehattington: I'm in. I'll have to explaing to my current roommate why I'm revising our current retirement plan of living in an adjoining duplex together and subsisting on bloody marys and fancy cheese, but I think she'll like this plan better.

TipsyRussell

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @TipsyRussell: A friend of mine's mom had a Delta 88 that was actually banana colored! Classy!

lurkystars

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @msAnthrope: THIS THIS THIS. This.

Houses didn't cost 10x of one's annual income in 1950, did they?

tscheese

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @SarahMC: zackly. So as msAnthrope said earlier, we need to think twice about financing all of that based on some mistaken ideas.

arodriguez.romero

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @grood: I think this is how this works: When a married partner's widowed, they do get to keep their spouse's Social Security payments, under some conditions. If both spouses worked during their lifetime, their household only gets one benefit, yours or your spouse's, after one of you passes away. If only one member of the household gets Social Security to begin with, then you receive this payment with no changes.

The Social Security Bureau sends everyone paying into the fund a document every year detailing your benefits.

Pension plans are different. Some keep on paying the surviving spouse, some stop after the original beneficiary has died.

mol666

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @secretspygirl: I venture that they are enjoying life after retirement without a scary-ass abusive situation to wake up to every day!
I bet they'd say it's worth it, in spite of everything, no amount of 'financial security' is worth taking that shit.
For myself, am single again, am dyin' under med bills, student loan, and car pmt., but I take care of moi.

jezebelacious

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @tscheese: Exactly. I'm totally bitter about all of this right now because I've reached the age where I don't want to live with roommates ANY MORE. But I can't afford to live alone. And it makes me feel pathetic.

Lady Skittlehattington

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @SarahMC: To add to what I've already said, this is why I just shake my head when I read about parents who crack the whip over their high schoolers, trying to make sure they're admitted to an Ivy League school and paying out the ass to get them SAT tutors and the like. Those kids are in for a rude awakening when they discover that a bachelors degree means nothing these days, even if it's from Harvard. You're probably gonna end up living in some rat infested basement apartment, eating oatmeal for every meal and wondering when all your hard work is gonna pay off.

SarahMC

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @boring diatribes: I'm thinking shows like the those Krazy Kardashians, the Farmer in the Dell, etc... are actually signs of the Apocalypse. Maybe a revolution isn't necessary, since fire and brimstone is coming anyway. Seriously...

rosasparks

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @arodriguez.romero: That's smart. At the risk of sounding like a hippie, I think this is going to be something we have to look into in the future. We can't count on the government to fix it- even if they do, it will take so long. Let's bring back the communes.

I'm not even joking.

My mom died really young and left me and my sister a house. It's dilapidated now, but once I'm done battling this uncle who's trying to take it, I'm fixing it up and when I can't work anymore, I'm moving back to Georgia and opening my home to whoever else needs to stay.

My sister couldn't understand why I was adamant about not getting rid of it before, but I think she sees now. She had a falling-out with one of our aunts and just moved in there.

robot ninja spy, of the guild of calamitous intent

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @arodriguez.romero: i agree. i think the whole system is going to crash in a couple of years--it's not sustainable. i'm relived that the student loan scandals and all this other financial bullshit has finally broke, but you would be SHOCKED at how many peers of mine with student loan debt didn't even know about the scandal--and they attended the schools outed. it's all tied in to the branding of higher education and the culture at large.
i was lucky enough to have some scholarships and parental support, but i still have a small loan. in retrospect, i would have taken a year off, worked, gone to a public school for two years and then transferred to a "name" school. there's just so much emphasis on the "college experience" and not why you are really there and what you are paying for--a diploma and skills so you can get a leg up in the job market. ok--i totally hijacked this thread. I'M SORRY! no more ritalin for me.

toothsome

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @toothsome: i see both sides of that argument. my parents' deal with my brothers and i was that they would pay for college, but only a college that THEY could afford. if we wanted to go to a different college, it was our responsibility to get the grants/scholarships/grades/sat's to get in. for all of us, we took the option of going to a local commuter school and living at home during college while also getting scholarship money from that commuter school along the way.

graduate school, however, was totally our responsibility. all of my school loans are from graduate school alone, and i'll be paying it off for 20 years, but it is a choice i made and i deal with. i can't work in my chosen field of study because i have to pay the loans back (they aren't with sallie mae or whoever and i've deferred them as long as my loaner allows). i work a job where i can save a little, live a little, and pay back my loans. it's not perfect, but i'm able to breathe and tread water.

rednrowdy

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @lurkystars: Ha! My grandma had a Crown Victoria in "grandma racing gold". We called it the banana boat.

TipsyRussell

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @Shawn-Shawn: Poetry is only a necessary tangent if it's a haiku. Here, an example:

It sucks to be poor.
NYU, how you screwed me!
Shawn, please spot me cash?



boring diatribes

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @myrtlebeachbum:

true, your grandmother's and even your inlaws' generation saved rather than spent. but keep in mind that 1)credit cards were not the easy and ubiquitous financial fixture in people's budgets back in the day, and 2)one's salary and the cost of everything was more balanced. houses weren't $400,000+. the discrepancy between income and costs wasn't nearly as extreme as it now is.

msAnthrope

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @arodriguez.romero: No, it does not. If I have kids, I plan to encourage them to attend trade school to become mechanics or plumbers.
Going to a ritzy private school doesn't guarantee you ANYTHING.


SarahMC

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @Lady Skittlehattington: I want to live out the last of my days in a haze of white wine and fuzzy slippers and unfortunate shoulderpads. Sign me up.

tscheese

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @Lady Skittlehattington: See, THAT is the kind of thing that makes me livid. Some scream "OMG inflation inflation! If we pay people more: inflation!" But we're being priced right the fuck out of the system!

tscheese

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @SarahMC: Think of it. Old women living together. We would have all the cookies and milk we ever wanted.

Lady Skittlehattington

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @rosasparks: Yeah, just like my mom (minus the sistah part) yet she, like your mom, was also doing it for us, too. In some respects, I'm so proud of what she did as a single mom, but other times I know that that will be impossible in my life, and I don't WANT that struggle forever. And in today's society, we're not doing it for ourselves because we want to, but because we have to.

Um, yes, revolution. Completely necessary. I was thinking the same thing while watching Farmer Takes A Wife....

boring diatribes

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @toothsome: less expensive, affordable public universities were "below"

That's a problem right there. Has this come up before on these boards? Is a private school really really worth it? I have serious doubts. SUNY-Albany represent!

arodriguez.romero

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @TipsyRussell: You're welcome! I thought we all needed a bit of uplifting. I sure did!

lurkystars

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @Lady Skittlehattington: I would freaking LOVE for that to be my old lady future.

SarahMC

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @SarahMC: Can we also have 20-year-old boys we can lead around on a leash, like LaComtesse?

My best bud is a doc, and we've already decided that she'd write out scripts with dates to be filled in later for all the good drugs we'd need or want. One of us should be lucid enough to get them filled. Hopefully, we could still afford them.

lurkystars

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @arodriguez.romero: Thanks---I think poetry is always a necessary tangent.

@boring diatribes: Exactly what I was thinking. So many of the women who are hitting their 70s and 80s today didn't even have the opportunity to work when they were younger given the social expectations of the era, let alone ferret away stores of cash to keep them going indefinitely after their husbands passed.

Shawn-Shawn

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @pferde_schwanz: I live paycheck to paycheck. I don't have spare money to put away.

Get this: My landlord can legally raise my rent by 7% every year. But my job is only required to give me a 3% raise. It's not me not being able to save. It's the motherfucking system screwing people.

Lady Skittlehattington

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> By the way, the above picture makes me smile. I just miss my mom. And my little girl snuggled up in bed with me this morning & said, 'mama, I just love you. Even when you have bad breath.'

Ugh - I am a mess today. Tears, tears. This post just did me in.

rosasparks

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @msAnthrope: the other side of that is by not helping your children with their college education, you may saddle them with student loan debt that they can barely crawl out from under. oftentimes, you might be the cosigner on that debt. or helping your kids pay it off or other expenses, or letting them live at home for free after graduation so that they can chip away at it. i don't advocate spending your savings on college for the kids, but i know a lot of people (recent graduates) who were expected to go to fancy private colleges by their parents, only to get accepted and realize mom and dad aren't really paying, but that they don't qualify for any real aid other than expensive private loans shoved upon them by the universities. of course, less expensive, affordable public universities were "below" these people. at 18, that's a huge burden that people only wake up to when they are 22 and making 25,000-28,000/year with no savings, no investments, over 100,000 in private student loan debt, and probably some credit card debt on top of it.

toothsome

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @tscheese: Haha - Yep, I know you're a fellow financial industry gal around here! Your right that part of being able to save is just biding your time as you move up the ladder! Glad to see you have a back up plan though!

marin79

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @lurkystars: grandma racing gold!

arodriguez.romero

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @lurkystars: Thank you for that last bit!!

TipsyRussell

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @SarahMC: YES! And wear extremely hilarious but effective sun hats while we tend our huge community garden. Old lady fashion is very important.

Lady Skittlehattington

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @rosasparks: you got that right. And I have lived my entire adult life premised on making sure I won't have to.

nyobserver

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @pferde_schwanz: But if you're living check to check when you're getting a salary, saving money isn't always an option.

RomanaTwo

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @robot ninja spy: I am living with my folks - not for money reasons - but it does help. I have been making serious plans with my cousin to join households when we get to be 70 and live in my house. It seems to me that 4 old folks can pull harder than 2. I realize this is not an option for everyone.

arodriguez.romero

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @marin79: Fortunately I'm in a pretty good industry and I keep getting promoted, so hopefully I'll be on top of it all before I'm too old to enjoy it.

I'm not worried about caring for my parents or grandparents, either - Mom and Dad are married, in good health, and our whole family are ranchers in the Midwest, and land doesn't generally depreciate in value. Dad keeps telling me that if things suck too hard in NYC, I can come home and wrangle cattle.

(I think I'm going to play my odds with the financial industry first. It has air conditioning.)

tscheese

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]> @tscheese: Awww that's sweet - not an investment advisor or anything, but always happy to help out fellow Jezzies with general info!

marin79

]]> <![CDATA[Poverty Is A Major Problem For America's Older Mothers]]>