<![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is? - Jezebel Comments]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is? - Jezebel Comments]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @tscheese: And (!) women (who are married/in live-in relationships) are still expected to do all the house-crap that NOBODY likes to do, especially when they've been pounding away at the glass ceiling all day while trying to still look pretty.

Personally, I live alone and take a walk/do yoga almost everyday. I avoid fashion mags and I don't have tv. It seems to have made a difference. That's my prozac.
Well, that, and a fair amount of alcohol. But hey, everybody needs something, right?

Booksaretoo

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> My future husband has been depressed, been on medication, and gotten better and got off the medication. He's doing fine now but he knows what the signs of depression are in himself and others. I really like how he knows about this stuff. I agree, though, a lot of men neglect themselves.

But my fiance also watched A Little Princess with me this weekend. And he isn't gay. He's just awesome that way.

wanton_ringlets

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @washionfore: He did come home at night. He went to treatment from 8am-3pm. It was a coed group of various ages. Seriously feel free to ask any questions you have. It's sort of nice to have people not be afraid to talk about it even if it's over the internet.

We Don't Live in the 60s

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> I don't know about anyone else, but I personally think that any person who can express their emotions without self-destructing or turning on the people nearest and dearest, is much healthier (and more attractive) than someone who keeps it all bottled up. If this means counseling, fine, do it. If it means going to the gym and beating up a kick-boxing bag, then all the better. As long as you acknowledge and accept your feelings (I'm working on this right now) you should be pretty good to go.

bluepotatoes66

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @MakeMeSmile: CBT is one of the only formal, documented forms of talk therapy with a proven success rate. if you're at the place where you're able to be brutally honest with yourself, it can be as good as any miracle drug. but as i stated before, a combo is usually the best.

just out of curiosity, does anyone else feel like women get punished for being the more intuitive, self-aware gender?

littlekicks

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @katastic: agreed. i believe that anti-depressants are over-prescribed, to some extent, but there are certainly people (and i'm one of them) who benefited from both meds AND talk therapy. one without the other is rarely effective. and without being cognizant of where your emotions/thoughts develop and why, you're really not headed for a long-term solution to your depression.

p.s. - love the SN, and graphic.

littlekicks

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> my boyfriend admitted to me that he thought depression was "made up" until a few years ago when he (allegedly) went through a bout of it himself. he still insists on singing "c'mon get happy!" to me whenever i say i'm depressed (clinically, at that), so something tells me he still doesn't have a grip on the problem.

littlekicks

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @lalaland13:
Men are more likely to be successful because they choose very dramatic methods of suicide--jumping off a bridge, putting a gun to their heads, etc. Women are more likely to try things like drug overdoses, and either freak out at the last minute and call 911 or have someone walk in on them.

At least, that's what I read once in a Psych class.

freudian_slip

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @RyanB: "So many men I know just shove down their emotions, and they only come out when the guy is really drunk or really pissed off"

ain't that the truth. sometimes it just easier to "organize" your thoughts when your drunk. in order of what is bothering you the most to the really pointless issues. The only problem with this method is, you can never remember the order or read the list you made the night before.

and of course drinking only brings you deeper into depression...its a vicious cycle...

Nefilim

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> A few things I've learned as someone who's dealt with anxiety & depression and have been treated for it (with meds and therapy).

For those of you who bemoan pharmaceutical companies and doctors pushing anti-depressants without focusing on the root issue--I hear ya. We need to slow down and get the individual to talk and sort out the issues that bruoght them to that state.

However--as great as this is, the problem is, there are a myriad of reasons why people are depressed, and while talk therapy is great--what is needed is a therapist who understands Cognitive Behavioral Therapy which has been proven to actually reverse anxiety and depression in patients who undergo it.

It's a relative new form of therapy (30 years old), but I encourage all of you to do some research and find a CBT trained therapist in your area to go to. I'm on my 3rd session with mine and it's been incredible.

MakeMeSmile

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> Maybe I'm generalizing here, but I think depression hits minority moms harder b/c of close knit families. I've seen friends and my own mother (Mexican) hit pretty hard by the empty nest thing. One of my friend's mom was suicidal.

whateverhappened

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> Too right that tons of dudes don't seek help for depression and other mental illnesses. My father was bipolar for 25 years before we FORCED him to seek help when he had a breakdown and hit rock bottom. When I was growing up, I recall his mercurial temper: he could be jovial and fun to be around, but the next day he'd have a hair trigger temper which was absolutely frightening if it went off. The fights he and my mom had were extremely destructive and have pretty much put me off confrontation (with anyone) for good. Which is not good for me, because, you know, sometimes you need to confront people. It's just that being in an argument or fight or witnessing literally makes me physically sick now.

I think genuine self-awareness is the key to getting help for both sexes. My younger brother, by contrast, is diagnosed with schizophrenia, and he blew the whistle on himself after years of drug abuse, bizarre behavior, and a suicide attempt. Nowadays, he's taking his meds, getting a degree, and is really open about his feelings. He'll never be 100% stable, but he's far better off than if he were the type to keep things bottled up.

cautionarywhale

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @westvillagegirl: And comments like this are exactly why men can't say they are depressed because we immediately get "Well so and so has it worse, man up". Hear it on this site more then most other places. I do love the advice I get here, but I've got to wade through a whole lot of people telling me that I don't have a problem cause someone else has it worse.

emptee_head

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @RyanB: This is very true. My ex-boyfriend never learned how to cope with his emotions so when he got drunk they all came roaring out. Scary stuff.

ZombieApocalypse

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @SarahMC:No, no. Well, not directly. I think that drug companies are interested in simply selling their product-medicating people- rather than getting at the root issue of why people ARE depressed, therein actually helping them. All those anti-depressant commercials which say "it's hard to be a good wife when you're depressed"? Um, maybe you're depressed chemically, but maybe you're depressed because your marriage is screwed up. Or you're not meant for that role. Or you're internalizing something. Rather than get at the root of the problem, they'd rather dope us up, keep up happy/ numb enough, keep us buying. So in a way-yes, they do keep us in our gender roles, by ensuring we don't go after actual change in our lives. *

* To be clear, anti-depressants help many people (and were useful to me at one point), but I'm talking about people who should be in therapy, rather than Prozac-ed up. I do think there is something inherently wrong in a system that focuses on the product- TAKE THIS PILL IT'LL MAKE YOU HAPPY- rather than the process- what is making you unhappy? Is it chemical, or should you make some changes in your life?

katastic

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @jetztinberlin: This is SO TRUE. My boyfriend was depressed last year, though he didn't realize it at the time. It was manifested along the lines of "I haven't met people as cool as my friends at home ... I miss California; New Jersey isn't as nice ... This school isn't right for me." I became depressed over the summer, and my cycle is more like "I have so few real friends - I'm really unlikeable and weird ... I'm not keeping up well with my classes - I'm so irresponsible ... I don't have enough money saved for the summer - I didn't economize enough this year." It frustrates him so much because once I start blaming myself I spiral downwards and have no motivation to pull myself out because I've begun to believe I don't deserve to feel better. It's very similar to how he was last year (constant exhaustion, irritability, emotional distancing from others) but so different on a causal level. Guilt is the driving force of my depression; he was ready to feel better as soon as his circumstances stopped oppressing him.

jammiriffic

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> Comments here are sometimes really quick to notice behavior among women that's conditioned by gender roles and social expectations, and sometimes a lot slower to notice that there are certain self-harming behaviors and mentalities conditioned into men -- I'm kinda happy that posts here seem to acknowledge that pretty fairly. The idea that men should be functional, rock-like, unaffected by emotion, able to master everything that comes their way ... this is pretty free-floating and enforced by men and women both, and seems to have a pretty negative effect on the mental AND physical health of men.

briardahl

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> This is why I cringe whenever I hear a parent tell their little boy to suck it up or be a man. :shudder:
Way to contribute to a system that will severely constrict your kid's ability to cope with emotional/mental issues.

SarahMC

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> I'd make a snarky comment, but I'm just not up for it. I have known LOTS of men I would consider clinically depressed. Some of them eventually figure it out and do something about it. But the general pressure to just "man up" that applies to nearly all other medical conditions, including sawing your arm off, also applies to depression. Show no weakness!

nyphotog

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Muffyn: I hadn't thought of that. You are right. I'm torn now, between desires for revenge and self preservation

redheadedstepchild

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Charlotte Corday, Miss Stabby Stabby 1793: Pretty much how it goes. I was married to such a princess once... Once Johnny!

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @bigtittycommittee: Yeah, see, way wrong way to express that sentiment. Even if you meant well.

Last gf I made go to a therapist, resented me for life. As far as I know, she still resents me.

Pretty much the best argument I've ever heard was:

"You're obviously dealing with something that is difficult for you to cope with, if the simple answer to fix the situation short term, and possibly even long term, is talk to a therapist and possibly take a pill every day, isn't it worth trying?"

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @SleeplessNights: i have to interject, i've heard from guy friends who say that their gfs expect 24/7 emotional support but have no intention of reciprocating b/c it's "not manly". i.e "i don't want to date a whiny guy", which brings to mind those annoying halfwit republican bloggers' "dating liberals" stories.

to which i say, dump the selfish bitch and get yourself a real woman. someone who wants to be a partner, not a fucking princess.

Charlotte Corday

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @SleeplessNights: Yeah, societal pressure on men basically requires them to hold it in. I'm not saying it is right, or in any way productive.

A lot of people have a personal level of denial built into them. When you're a younger male it isn't ok to be in therapy, or be on meds, or whatever unless you've been on them for a while to begin with. By then you're already severed fscked up.

Basically what I had to teach myself was how to vent to get the stress/emotion out, and then ask my gf to let me talk to her about it a few hours later. (Not days/weeks/etc.) Just enough to let me calm down and clear my brain enough to be able to actually talk about something.

From there I had to teach myself to not let myself get to that point, which was a bigger issue overall. In my case I grew up with a very emotional mother, and an incredibly stoic (privately emotional) father. Which, I inherited both. Which makes me rather sensitive to things, and I naturally want to hide it and be strong for others.

I'm not making excuse for the men, it's their fault for not adjusting their lives pro-actively. It's just partly any explanation for the phenomenon.

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> wow. i just told my dude he needed to see someone about his depression the other day, and he bugged. the. fuck. out.

bigtittycommittee

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @SleeplessNights: I'm with Xavoc. I can tell when people are not ok. I need someone who can do the same with me. I think it has more to do with people being in tune with each other than emotional caretaking.

redheadedstepchild

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @BlondeGrlz:I am always surprised by how common my problems are. I am not alone!Woot!

Philthyist

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @cardboardbelt: what are you, my id?

Charlotte Corday

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @We Don't Live in the 60s: Stupid questions: -So he came home at night? - Was is exclusively men or women as well?

thank you!

washionfore

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> Oh, and y'all want to know the other thing that ticks me off about that breakup? My friend's ex comments on this site from time to time. Everytime I see his username, I get stabby. I seriously want to unmask him and be like "you fucking cheating loser with fetish issues!" But it would be uncivil, and I suspect Hortense would spank me.@Charlotte Corday, Miss Stabby Stabby 1793: @Charlotte Corday, Miss Stabby Stabby 1793:

BeckySharper

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Muffyn: Much like the cute bunny that you are.

Philthyist

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @redheadedstepchild: he isnt a sociopath. just someone who is really screwed up.
And seriously- he is totally nice to me now that he doesnt feel as though I am the chain around his neck dragging him under.

Also- as I said, he has many good qualities, or I wouldnt have been with him. It really is all related to his depression and unresolved issues from his (quite terrible) childhood.

Philthyist

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @westvillagegirl: @westvillagegirl: Re the brown dress: right? I actually look good in brown, but as a southerner, I'm superstitious about wearing dark colors at a wedding. Also, not appropriate for an outdoor June wedding.

BeckySharper

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Charlotte Corday, Miss Stabby Stabby 1793: I disagree. I think the best revenge is framing your enemy for the murder of his family.

cardboardbelt

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> Also, there are suppliments you can take that are "bettER". I reacted extremely bad to all the (about 6) different types of anti-depressants I tried. Also to St. John's Wort so do'nt just think that because it is natural it'll work great. But I take 5-HTP now along with digestive enzymes and acidophilus (sp) and while I still have my moments, they are ABSOLUTELY NOTHING like before. To each his own. But no one should suffer if they don't HAVE to.

Muffyn

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Philthyist is annoyed: as long as you have a grip on the situation -- which it sounds like you do -- then good luck. Just be careful.

brendastarlet

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @westvillagegirl: and brown in june in dc. sweat-tastic!

Charlotte Corday

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @BeckySharper: I can practically SEE the fog of mosquitos. Shudder!

westvillagegirl (exiled in chicago)

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Xavoc:

Normally, I like what you're saying. You seem to be a pretty decent guy who tries hard to understand other people's points of view.

But in this instance, I have to beg to differ.

A lot of men use venting as a way to escape from having to learn about themselves and their feelings. I listen to my guy friends vent, and then they want to act like nothing ever happened. And they let their anger build up for so long that, when they do blow, they can't have a discussion about any emotional issue, because they are too upset.

As for the woman 'knowing' something is wrong, and doing the emotional caretaking in your relationship, why does it devolve on to her? Can you not explain yourself before you get so angry you have to explode?

Personally, I'm only going to date people in the future who can tell me when something is bothering them, and not expect me to magically know when they are upset.

SleeplessNights

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Charlotte Corday, Miss Stabby Stabby 1793: Argh! That is one of the things I most hate about men--sorry, sweeping generalization--they rarely just dump you. They make your life miserable in the hopes that you'll make the decision for them and dump their asses. So cowardly.

I do think one of the great signs of self-awareness is when you can say "You know, I love him and I really think we could make it work. But he doesn't want to. So I'm out." It took me awhile to learn how to do that, but it's one of the most valuable things I've learned.

BeckySharper

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @redheadedstepchild: EEEEK. Sociopaths are exactly who I would NOT want to do something bad to. I just want to run away and hide and remain small and unobtrusive.

Muffyn

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @westvillagegirl: People get freaked out for good reason when the meds are for their brain. Having had a moronic doctor proscribe medication that reacted terribly with my ADD meds, and THEN upped the dose on me to send me from mildly depressed to I don't care about anything at all? Well, gosh...

The thing is, you don't always have to be on meds for your entire life. Work with your doctor, work with a specialist, work with a therapist and get them to adjust things as needed. My specialist freaked when she heard what combination of meds I was on, and immediately took me off my antidepressants.

By then I'd figured out how to cope with what was bothering me at the time, and didn't need them anyway. Unfortunately I'd also lost my job, some friends, and had the joy of watching my entire life fall apart in the process.

But, a week later a friend said to me. "Wow, you sound so much saner!" To which my brain went, "Why didn't anyone tell me?"

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Charlotte Corday, Miss Stabby Stabby 1793: Yeah, brown. Doesn't exactly scream "cheerful optimism," does it?

westvillagegirl (exiled in chicago)

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Philthyist is annoyed: what's the old saying? living well is the best revenge.

Charlotte Corday

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Philthyist is annoyed: There is a fairly high chance you are dating my ex. He couldn't afford text messages when we dated, so instead I got notes folded up into little footballs. No, we were not 15.

BlondeGrlz

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @westvillagegirl: Chiffon. I was not amused. The parasol was Chinese oiled-paper with cherry blossoms--so at least it wasn't all frilly from the Scarlett O'Hara collection. Still.

Also, it was an outdoor wedding in June in the DC suburbs. WTF? It's always 100 degrees by then.

Apparently I am still bitter.

BeckySharper

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @BeckySharper: No, I think up the chimney.

Why do people think this txting/email stuff is ok? I'm seriously not getting it.

@Philthyist is annoyed: Ick. Side note - this sounds like a guy who is not just depressed, but also a sociopath. I hope you did something bad to him.

redheadedstepchild

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @westvillagegirl: the parasol was my bridge too far. but wtf is the deal with BROWN?

Charlotte Corday

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @BeckySharper: @Muffyn: @brendastarlet: Also? Its fun times to post it here- helps me to remember why I dont want to be with him anyway...

Philthyist

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Philthyist is annoyed: That's the catch really. You can't help someone help themselves. You can be supportive, you can even drag them to a therapist themselves...But if they don't want to help themselves, then there's nothing you or anyone else can do.

Sometimes it takes losing the best thing you've ever had just to realize you've hit bottom and need to ask for help from someone qualified to assist you.

*hug*

Hope things get better for you. As the advice always goes, it'll get better over time. Which, you never manage to believe until you look back and see that things are indeed getting better.

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @BeckySharper: "I couldn't figure out if he was either really stupid or secretly hoped she'd find out."

See, this is what still boggles my mind. I just don't know. His reaction was consistent with total shock and he asked how the hell I found out, but a part of me thinks he couldn't really have been that stupid.

westvillagegirl (exiled in chicago)

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @MakeMeSmile:

The pressure to achieve? But why wouldn't that apply equally to Asian American men? And, to generalize, it seems like it's a lot easier to be an Asian woman in America today than a man, at least socially.

I think that one reason -- one -- that women seek out shrinks is that it's hard to find someone who will listen to them and take them seriously.

Seeräuber Jenny

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @BeckySharper: no, in retrospect, i'm convinced my ex wanted me to dump him (cheating, etc), but i stubbornly (and unwittingly) stuck it out. b/c i loved him and b/c i really thought we could make it work.

Charlotte Corday

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @BeckySharper: Was it taffeta? Because, if it was, I'd have staged a sit-in right on the effing aisle.

THE HORROR!

westvillagegirl (exiled in chicago)

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Philthyist is annoyed: o. wow. I'm really glad to hear you're a strong woman and are on the up. It takes a strong lady to see through the haze and confusion they're dealing with and know it ISNT you. (and even then, the smartest lady I ever knew had been in an abusive relationship where he eventually hung himself, but after they split.)

Muffyn

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @brendastarlet:Heavens no! Moving home would be insanity. The lease is in my name on our house. I will ride it out and be fine. He is actually the one in a precarious position, because should I choose- I can boot him at any time. At the moment, I am unwilling to look for a roommate- or start paying the utilities- I have my own bedroom in the house- and as long as we are not together- he is perfectly nice to me.
Oddness. I know.

Philthyist

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Philthyist is annoyed: OMFG. Shit on the curb, sans Hefty bag. No guilt whatsoever.

BeckySharper

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> Woohoo!

Depression: All of the anger without the enthusiasm. Holding people down since time immortal.

Actually, most guys I know eventually succumb to depression at some point in their lives. The trick is providing them with some place safe to let the emotion out.

Unfortunately, quite a few women view a man expressing emotion (be it anger, sadness, depression, guilt, or whatever) as a sign of weakness.

I have had several woman have end a relationship with me because they were incapable of simply letting me vent, give me a hug, and say "It will be OK." Yet if I was ever not supportive of them, they would immediately become angry.

Now I limit myself to dating women who pay enough attention to me to know when I'm not OK well before I say something.

Nothing quite like being afraid to show emotion. A guy can only be stoic for so long.

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @cardboardbelt: I thought you were serious because, well, one actually CAN get rid of (or prevent) Type 2 by becoming more active.

SarahMC

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Philthyist is annoyed: remember what I said the other day about f-you money? This is why you need it. Do you have a friend you can move in with? Or back home for a little while?

brendastarlet

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @westvillagegirl: Why do men do that???? My best friend found out that her husband put up an ad on Adult Friend Finder, USING HER FUCKING LAPTOP. They are divorced now.

I couldn't figure out if he was either really stupid or secretly hoped she'd find out. Either way, I was happy to see him go. (I had to wear a brown bridesmaid dress and carry a parasol at that wedding, and I think it affected my sense of goodwill toward that marriage.)

BeckySharper

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @BeckySharper: Blue Cantrell, is that you?

westvillagegirl (exiled in chicago)

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @SarahMC: Aplologies. See my comment above: @cardboardbelt:

cardboardbelt

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @SarahMC: I think he was making teh jokes. Which ended up being pretty funny.

But I think we can all agree about your original point. People get freaked out for some reason when the meds are for their brain. What is remarkable about some anti-depressants, is that scientists don't even fully understand how some of them work. They just know that they do.

westvillagegirl (exiled in chicago)

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @SarahMC: Amazing. Isn't it.

Philthyist

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Too Hot For TNR: OK? That is not what I'm taking about, though. I am talking about a general resistance to taking meds for depression when one has not tried any form of treatment. Because they don't want to be "on meds" or "it will pass."

SarahMC

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @mepo: this is an issue in Japan as well -- mainly among high school boys who are under so much pressure to do well so they can get into the best Japanese colleges. Japanese society is as far from sharing your feelings as a culture can get, and these youngsters feel they have no where to turn.

brendastarlet

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @westvillagegirl: awesomeness.

Philthyist

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Charlotte Corday, Miss Stabby Stabby 1793: @Muffyn: @GretchenWeiners: @KittenFluff: @BeckySharper:Fro some fun times allow me to share the VERBATIM text:
I want out. Don't want to deal w/u anymore.

REALLY? No one is holding you, you bitch. Also, I was the one dealing with him, not vice versa. But he is very good at making me feel like the problem. Something that Muffyn is also familiar with.

On some levels- he is a great guy. His mental issues are ruining him though.

Philthyist

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Charlotte Corday, Miss Stabby Stabby 1793: Well temp sadness is not the same as depression anyway.

I can't BELIEVE the "dumped by text" and "divorced by email" stories. Christ on a cracker.

SarahMC

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> Its a relief that your not the only person who have gone through some depression episodes in your life from time to time. I think my biggest one was during college but I sought help at my school counselor office and that really helped me alot.

MsMichelle

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @SarahMC: Well, antidepressants have a LONG list of side effects for an ok chance of recovery.

Again, for me it was the suicide thing. I don't really need more ideas of killing myself running through my head when I'm down.

When insulin sends visions of nooses through my head, I won't take it either.

redheadedstepchild

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @KittenFluff , either fear or betrayal. Speaking generically, not to anyone's case in this thread (just to be clear).

@ SarahMC, whoa there. If I tried a whole bunch of Diabetes drugs and all of them made my Diabetes worse, I would not take more Diabetes drugs either.

Too Hot For TNR

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Philthyist is annoyed: @Charlotte Corday, Miss Stabby Stabby 1793: @BeckySharper: Ladies, your stories have actually helped me to forgive my sad sack of an ex, for not being as awful as he could have been. (I caught him cheating on me via Myspace ON MY OWN EFFING COMPUTER!)

westvillagegirl (exiled in chicago)

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Philthyist is annoyed: Uncollected items that are left at your house can be hocked on e-bay. Or donated to Goodwill for a tax deduction. Just sayin'.

BeckySharper

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @cardboardbelt: Who said I was talking about Type 2?

What I am saying is that people do not resist treating physical ailments the way they resist treating mental illness, and it's stupid.

SarahMC

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @westvillagegirl:Ah, true. Yeah, I should have picked some other ailment that's not actually possible to walk off. Let's try that joke again:

I once walked off Lupus.

cardboardbelt

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Philthyist is annoyed: nice, *smart* lady. but go he must. he's just dragging you down with him.

Charlotte Corday

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @washionfore: There was an intensive outpatient program that was three weeks long available at a hospital near where we live. He got group therapy, talk therapy, and meds. And thank god insurance covered most of it because we never could have on our own.

We Don't Live in the 60s

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @redheadedstepchild: Why thank you. Enjoy some CA sunshine for me today, willya?

BeckySharper

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Philthyist is annoyed: ah. you're so right. you know, as much as I "knew" I wasn't a failure even though he made me feel like one, I thought I was just so annoying I aggrivated him all the time. And I completely understand that different people are annoyed by different types so I can annoy some people but be an ok person still; so I wasn't COMPLETELY broken of my esteem. But to have the person who tells you they love you think you're horrible and they "wish they didn't love you", it still hurts ya know.
But what you said makes so much more crystal sense. He DID hate that he had feelings for me and he didn't like to acknowledge them. Hrmmm. Thanks. You kind of helped close a page in my self-esteem book.

Muffyn

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @BeckySharper: waste of a bin bag. i'd have tossed it out with a sign that said "free!".

my divorce and my bff have made me tougher.

Charlotte Corday

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @BeckySharper: @Charlotte Corday, Miss Stabby Stabby 1793: I am a nice lady. Also a broke one. Willing to wait until the end of the lease since he pays more of the bills.

Philthyist

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Philthyist is annoyed: i got the divorce note via email. i feel you.

Charlotte Corday

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @cardboardbelt: LOL Are you making a joke? Because that is actually possible! (If you walked off weight.

westvillagegirl (exiled in chicago)

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Philthyist is annoyed: @Charlotte Corday, Miss Stabby Stabby 1793: Actually, Charlotte said exactly what I was thinking but didn't put in my post to you. His shit would have been in a Hefty bag on the curb when he got home. Because if he doesn't want to talk about it, you don't need to either.

Actually, maybe I wouldn't have even used a Hefty bag.

BeckySharper

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @BeckySharper:Hence my bitterness. It is actually helpful to talk about it anonymously on here though.
And a little fun.
Pain=great stories to tell.

Philthyist

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @SarahMC: i knew mine was temporary, but i was ready to take meds if i didn't improve thru exercise and therapy. and divorce.

Charlotte Corday

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Philthyist is annoyed:

oh god, i so feel you. and my break up was a while back.

But now I'm like, "You wanna destroy everything good you have? Fine. In the words of Sarah McLachlan, its a friend that won't betray."

Sometimes ya gotta throw the life raft to yourself. It doesn't mean that you don't love them, it means that you can't let your love for them kill you too.

GretchenWeiners

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @BeckySharper: Hey, good for you. Being young and happy is where its at.

redheadedstepchild

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Philthyist is annoyed: and you didn't toss his shit out on the curb immediately? you are a nice lady.

Charlotte Corday

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @BeckySharper: thank you! and i believe his happiness is his responsibility, not yours. you can try as much as possible to help, but sometimes, you just end up enabling their denial/depression, and/or being just as miserable. i did both.

and now i'm more than usually commitment-phobic b/c i don't like to give up on people i love. stupid but true.

Charlotte Corday

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Muffyn: Knew that he hated to love me.

I believe I expressed it as:
You resent me, because you have feelings for me and its really tiring.

Philthyist

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @SarahMC: I've walked off type 2 diabetes.

cardboardbelt

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Philthyist is annoyed: Okay, that's fucking ridiculous. I don't care if he is depressed. That's a total douchebag move.

BeckySharper

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @KittenFluff: I know. I came a little late to this post and was trying to read all the comments before commenting and wanted to comment on yours but I still had so much more to read (and it slipped my mind). I commend you on being able to come to closure with that. I think that would drive me nutty.
Maybe it is just a big sign on how low they've sunk in their depression because they alienate themselves so much and they can't form normal bonds with others. I always told my ex that I knew he hated to love me. He couldn't interact with people in normal ways. *then again he was overseas at the time, but he'd done it beofre via phone so I wouldn't have put it past him even if he was in the states*

Muffyn

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @westvillagegirl: Thanks. He and I weren't very close and he clearly wanted to go, but it was still shocking.

I centainly think you're right, however, about chosen methods. If ever I was going to commit suicide (I've never felt the urge), I'd certainly choose some fool-proof method. But then again, I'm a guy.

cardboardbelt

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> I am surprised at the number of "Ew I won't take meds" comments I'm reading.

Would you refuse meds if you developed diabetes?

Would you "wait it out" if you had chronic nerve pain?

It just doesn't make any sense.

SarahMC

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @KittenFluff: we LIVE together- and he still did it via text. When I called him- he rejected my calls 10 TIMES before picking up and saying that there was nothing to discuss.
Some men suck.
True Story.

Philthyist

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @brendastarlet: I agree, but most (and I include myself as a potential likely suspect) are unlikely to be so clear minded about it, and there are still so many who won't be compassionate - I've seen jobs, marriages, families, friends lost over that (or much less).

@SarahMC: Absolutely. Both men and women subscribe to them far too much (and this pursuit of a 'constructive' sexual or personal ideal ends up destructive in the long run, ironically).

expatriatedjerseyan

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Philthyist is annoyed:

I was going to write the exact same post, but you have covered everything so closely it's positively eerie. Guess I'm not alone. But I'm sad for all of us that are trying to struggle with it.

SleeplessNights

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Charlotte Corday, Miss Stabby Stabby 1793: If he had been really cruel or cheated or something, then no, I wouldn't feel guilty. It's more like he presented himself as Prince Charming but turned out to be a really damaged, depressed person and I felt totally duped. He made me miserable because he was so miserable himself. I feel like I should pity him, because at the end of the day, I'm young and happy and he never will be. But I'm still angry that he made me so miserable!

(also, your username is awesome)

BeckySharper

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> This post neglects to even considert the idea that therapy and drugs might not work for everyone. And yes OBVIOUSLY men are capable of experiencing and understanding depression, ugh.

AlannaBanana

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> In Ireland young male suicide is endemic with 'cluster' areas of suicides where a number of males in a given area (often rutal) will commit suicide. In my area back home we have had at least three deaths a year in what is a small population.

Recent studies have shown that suicide numbers increase in times of economic stability and prosperity and so Celtic Tiger Ireland provides a suitable environ for such a high suicide rate.

mepo

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @PeteRR: Definitely, especially considering the spotty (at best) record of success for such medications, as I witnessed with some I care about very much, who I think suffered more under certain medications than off of them. The fear of losing control, especially to something that may be just as destructive to your mind and body, makes it that much harder.

expatriatedjerseyan

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Muffyn: What is it about these men that makes them think it's OK to end a serious and/or long-term relationship so callously? As I mentioned above, mine broke it off by simply dropping off the face of the earth -- not returning my phone calls or emails -- and this was after a relationship that went on (and off) for 2.5 years. I think my ex has undiagnosed narcissistic personality disorder; I'd recommend checking out the symptoms on wikipedia or similar to see if anything sounds familiar.

KittenFluff

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @We Don't Live in the 60s: May I ask what type of program he entered into?

washionfore

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @expatriatedjerseyan: Well, this issue is just one more reason why strict gender roles are so damaging.

SarahMC

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Sarasvati49: I'm sorry. I hope you have someone you can talk to about your feelings like a family member or trusted friend. I never realized how emotionally stunted I was after my 4 year relationship with the guy who would ignore me or get upset and leave when I had emotions. I had no one to talk to for part of the time and it was horrid. And the worst part was I never saw it at the time.
Please find someone you can confide in.

Muffyn

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Muffyn: Oh yeah- totally. I didn't think you were being unsupportive at all. Actually I was thinking- phew- it is a relief to know I am not alone.

Philthyist

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @cardboardbelt: Yes, I'm sorry for the generalization, but it's hard not to generalize when we're talking about macro phenomenons. (sp?)

I'm sorry about your friend.

westvillagegirl (exiled in chicago)

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @expatriatedjerseyan: that's the perception that a lot of people have, but I am betting that you would find a lot more compassion than you suspect. Besides, this is your life you're talking about. Being outed is far less important than getting better.

brendastarlet

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @BeckySharper: i don't think you should feel badly if he was awful to you. i call it the shitbag tax.

Charlotte Corday

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Philthyist is annoyed: I was just going to ammend my comment to make sure you knew I supported you and not living your life to try and make his bearable. I'm sorry you had it in a shitty way like you did (my dump was via IM... so i feel your pain). However, the bright (?) side is that you did all you could have and we can't shove happiness down others' throats no matter how we wish we could.

Muffyn

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @brendastarlet: I could drag him anywhere but it's getting him to talk that's another story. His mother drug him to quack doctor's for years to assuage her own guilt, for him the situation is compounded because of his distrust/ dislike of the profession.

washionfore

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @NefariousNewt: Good note, as always, NN. I am sorry to hear about your depression. And that of the other Jezemen.

My bubs is depressed on and off by changes at work and is verbal about it, etc, and in therapy and on meds, but I think I need to step up the encouragement at home. He is a vicious self-grader, but gentle as a lamb to others.

I've noticed that he feels different pressures than I do because of the manly aspect of things. The media and Hollywood do a good job of presenting women as one-dimensional sex drive-thrus, but it also represents men as being either near-gods or pathetic losers. I don't need my husband to blow anything up, but according to Hollywood he's a failure because he's losing his hair, has a little belly, and a (hard-earned) graduate degree.

I would not trade him for anyone.

noseriously

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Too Hot For TNR: @Charlotte Corday, Miss Stabby Stabby 1793: I think that a lot of people confuse being depressed with clinical depression. All of us have ups and downs in our lives, but clinical depression is different in that it isn't necessarily attached to an event. It may have been triggered by an event, but then stays with you. If a parent dies you will be depressed for a few months. That's normal. But if your cat dies and two years later you feel like killing yourself, that's not normal.

sweetbeans

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Macloserboy:Oh yeah, a band, how could I have forgotten about that? I guess I just hope they take option b. before it comes to that.

Kidding, my sullen musician friends!

cardboardbelt

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @brendastarlet: I agree. I just think the point is that there are a lot of considerations, and if you were ever 'outed' the consequences may be the same as being outed as an addict or some kind and whatnot. It's not easy for anyone to admit and come to terms with depression, male or female.

expatriatedjerseyan

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @expatriatedjerseyan: I think there's a fear of losing control aspect also. Whether it's truly embracing the sadness you feel or taking a prescription anti-D, you might end up getting "addicted" and not be able to get back to where you were.

PeteRR

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> NO! Men don't understand what depression is! I've seen my husband go thru funks, and he alwasy says he never gets depressed. He just won't admit it, even if I ask him if he is okay. He has disdain for those who expressed the fact that they are depressed, and will avoid me if I'm feeling bluesy (won't even ask if I'm okay). He is at an age where he is going thru changes, and he just wants the whole world to stop until he feels better. When counseling is suggested, he scoffs and says he isn't going to pay someone to get in his business. This is why it seems that there are men that suddenly blow their brains out for no apparent reason. They suffer and suffer and refuse help until it gets too bad...

Sarasvati49

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @pferde_schwanz: Hey, it sounds like we have the same doctor! or at least the same script.

@westvillagegirl: This is bullshit. Serious bullshit. the violent, bloody deaths are significantly more successful. That's why they get chosen. The three guys that I know that killed themselves shot themselves in the shower. The women that TRIED were found after majorly underestimating the dosage of pills needed.

So - this guys take. I suffer from mild depression. Occasionally, it would get bad. I never saw a doctor, cause I DID NOT WANT DRUGS. I've got suicidal issues, and from what everybody says, I'd have offed myself pretty quick.

Talk therapy didn't help. I tried 3 different people, and it never felt right.

Instead, I moved to sunny SoCal, and I exercise. And feel good. I've actually noticed fundamental changes in the way I feel about things - it's not just a string of good days. So I think I might be able to be ok in places where it gets gray.

redheadedstepchild

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Charlotte Corday, Miss Stabby Stabby 1793: I had exactly the same experience after I broke off an engagement a few years ago. Lost way too much weight, stomach hurt all the time, cried all the time, etc. But I was the same as you--I knew that my feelings were situational and it never reached the level of true depression. And now, like you, I've moved past it, I love my life and I'm really happy and grateful that the experience is over. And now I know that I can deal with really shitty experiences and conquer them.

My ex is 50 and he's miserable. I wish I felt sorry for him, I really do. But I'm secretly gratified and ashamed of feeling that way.

BeckySharper

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @westvillagegirl: the pain must have been so great that he couldn't handle it any more.

I hate to see the word "selfish" used because at that moment in time, they aren't thinking about the impact this will have on others, they are only thinking about escaping. Of course, it's devastating for the survivors, and the kids blame themselves for the rest of their lives.

brendastarlet

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Philthyist is annoyed: Also? My 3am can't sleep anxiety seems to have disappeared. Which frankly, is great news.

Philthyist

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @westvillagegirl: I took a class in high school called "Death and Society" that included a section on suicide, so I understand what you mean.

When I was a freshman in college, my roommate's 16-year-old brother committed suicide. It was devastating. He shot himself in the chest after being caught cheating on a test. He came from a close-knit Irish/Italian Catholic family. I'm sure the test was not the reason, but I don't think anyone realized there were problems up till then. He was a really great kid and it was just so shocking. He and my roommate were very close and she is just such a strong person to get through something like this the way she has.

KittenFluff

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> I've recently been living through my partner being seriously depressed. He couldn't work, he couldn't sleep, and he was miserably unhappy. A little over two months from walking into the hospital with him, I have the person I fell in love with back. It was really difficult for him to accept that he couldn't just make it go away. I'm so proud of him for realizing that he needed help and being able to ask for it. But, I saw what he had to go through before he would accept that he didn't have to feel so bad.

We Don't Live in the 60s

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> i was once suicidal a couple of years ago, which i guess stemmed from some kind of depression...it would be easy to say that i was having trouble dealing with my sexuality, but it wasn't about that at all

i'm not really sure what my point is, except to offer up an example of a guy who was depressed (and not because of some qualifier like sexuality)

PopCultureSavant

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @SarahMC: @westvillagegirl:
I can't speak for PeteRR (and I suspect he'd agree), but I can say that for myself, present company is excluded when speaking of the sexual consequences of admitting depression and seeking appropriate help.

expatriatedjerseyan

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @Macloserboy: i'm glad you got the help you needed, whatever form it might take. not doing so would have been a sin.

Charlotte Corday

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> @BeckySharper:I am still in the phase of- I don't care if he gets help. BREAKING HEADLINE: Philthyist is bitter because he won't get help/has undermined the relationship.

@Muffyn: He dumped me last week- VIA text- after a stupid argument. I felt terrible that night- and okay, maybe I cried a lot on the couch on Sunday, but today is Wednesday, and strangely (not so strangely) I feel relieved.

Philthyist

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> Its not just that men won't go to the doctor, but that there is no such thing as a chronic illness. Once they've taken a pill, thats it - they're healed! No follow-up is necessary!

My ex went through rehab, and thus considered himself totally healed of all issues forever. So, any depression he felt - anytime he displaced his childhood problems- it had to be my fault. After all, he dealt with his issues in rehab!

Ugh, what a bastard. If any of you are in the DC area, be warned!

GretchenWeiners

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]> Stupid coding! That non-pharmaceutical alternative is found

">here. Or, since the preview is messing up, go here:

+ Watch video

Too Hot For TNR

]]> <![CDATA[Are Men Less Likely To Be Depressed Because They Don't Even Know What It Is?]]>