<![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy - Jezebel Comments]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy - Jezebel Comments]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @sarita: HUH?

rmontcal

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114:

hey asshole, don't talk to us like we're five. we are intelligent women (and some men) who are confident in our sexual lives. just because you're an insecure jackass doesn't mean that everyone else has to keep their thoughts to themselves. only people like you should learn to sew their own mouths shut. you know what, sew your asshole shut too, because all you do is talk out of your ass.

Leigh81387

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Xavoc:
haha, I just got finished watching that part of the movie when I read that.


Leigh81387

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114:
the word is inanimate you idiot. and i probably wont even get put on watch for this because you're that much of an asshole to the other jezzies. douchebag.


Leigh81387

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Le Kangourou de Kataroo (Bjork did it).: they do very well.

erinlynne

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @trikitixa: YES!!! LOVE that show!! That's the first thing I thought of when I first read this

MisfitMolly

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: Most of my female frieds use a variety fo household objects to pleasure themselves. Hell, one of the most popular vibrators in the world, the magic wand, is a massager.

You have an opinion which a vast majority of women you'll encounter in life DO or WILL disagree with at some point. Some women start late, but they will start, and then, in the eyes of all sexually adventurous (i.e. normal) women, you will be wrong and sexually unappealing. Add that to your eloquent, vaginal drying way with words, and you'll be lucky to get laid ever.

Claystil

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> There's actually a mobile app called Masterbator Pro that has a few different pulse settings to choose. And I'm sure the motor in your phone is what the strength of the vibration depends on.

aksum4586

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> Oh my gosh, this here onslaught of comments is just giving me far too many Jezzies to crush upon!

Ms. Pants

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> I'm late to this party but I wanted to share with the Jezzies:

About a 10 days after 9/11 I had to travel cross country for a business trip. As is my usual m.o., I tossed my favorite vibe in my carry on and headed out to make my flight. The TSA agent (though they weren't called that at the time) pulled my bag out of the x-ray and called for an agent to search it. This great big athletic dude unzips the bag and starts rifling through its contents. He hesitated a moment, then got this smug look on his face as he drew the vibe/dildo out of my bag, as though doing so would somehow embarrass or humiliate me. A few of his colleagues, and several road weary co-travelers slowed to see my reaction. I looked him square in the face and said, "I know it's smaller than the one your wife uses on you, but I was in a hurry and grabbed the first one I found." The place erupted in howling laughter. He dropped that thing like it was nuclear waste, quickly zipped my bag and sent me on my way. Do NOT mess with a Dominatrix.

BGGA

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: wow, you really like to construe everything so it makes your point of view seem like the best one ever and that we should automatically assume that you are right and should defer to you in all decision-making in the future.

Again, yes, you can have your opinions. You can believe in them all you want. However, what I don't agree with is your blanket statement that what some women do in the privacy of their own home is disgusting and should stop. And the fact that you are currently STUFFING IT DOWN OUR THROATS! You don't like what we have to say, leave. You say that this is the most interesting thread that you have read in a long time, then you must not get out much. The reason we care is because you came blasting in here, judging us and demneaing us. It is a natural human reaction to defend oneself when threatned, and you good sir, were coming off as an intimidating jerk which automatically makes anyone back go up and defences come out. I wonder how many amazing women you are assosciated with who get themselves off with the shower head, but for fear of recrimination, don't tell you. How dare you take one simple thing and use it as a platform to judge someones entire existence and personality! There's more than this one thing that makes a person. But you, sir, have only made your opinions known about a great many things, and with that expression, it has so coloured my opinion of you that it makes me never want to assosciate with you on anything. You are one of the most offensive people I have ever met!

And you twist my comments into something reprehensible and bring pedophilia into it! Which is something completely different and you know it! This is the conclusion, dear sir, of our communications. We can agree to disagree with this topic and leave it at that. I can't change your mind and you WILL NOT change mine. Good day!

@Ms. Pants: Thanks! And yeah, I wish I could change the men part as there are women out there with the exact same mind-set. But on the bright-side, I have learned some new and very interesting things to try out now. Yay for Jezebel, my saviour from work-day boredom!

ZoeStars

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: Makes me feel pretty good, there's actually an underlying message to my post.

Yes, that message is that you are boring. Now, weren't you going to leave?

whynotshesaid

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @funnyface:

Amen to that!

fivestarsecret

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> And my personal fave for besties today goes to: ZoeStars. Though it might be a bit long to quote. (I recommend beginning with, "It is men like you..." even though I somewhat disagree with the "men" part.)

Ms. Pants

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @ZoeStars: Hahaha good one man, now go talk to a pedophile about what they like to do sexually and how its okay because you can't control them. I know this isn't exactly the same because obviously the girls aren't intentionally harming anyone, but what's normal to some people is fucked up to others (as gross as it is I'm sure theres "some" children out there that actually enjoy that treatment ). You guys I'm sure wouldn't hesitate to call a pedophile or even someone that watches child porn a creep (I'd hope so, but you never know with the sexual openness of this particular thread) I know I personally would.

I never went around this place telling people to stop doing what they do, go ahead. That won't change what I think of the topic I'm sorry, I don't see why you guys care so much.

I don't have the "I'm so good my women will never need a toothbrush" attitude, I have a "If my girlfriend so chooses to use a household items for pleasuring herself, we're not suited to be together and we will BOTH be better off doing our own thing" attitude.

Lastly, no to the sex toy scenario because I don't buy that shit, I'm not into kinky stuff and if I were buying it and my aunt, uncle, mom, or dad saw I wouldn't care because I'm comfortable in my own skin, not out to impress anyone that would be who I am. Try living like that and you won't be so offended when someone doesn't take to the same opinion on sexual pleasure as you. What's your aunt and relatives going to do, they obviously have sex also.

Jericho114

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> Any of you jezzies, gar. Jerichonumbers seems to have affected my ability to properly construct sentences and include proper grammar.

ZoeStars

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Xavoc: I totally didn't see your "he just wants the last word, stop posting" post before I posted. Alas, I fear that I may have infruriated him a little bit more. Whatev's.

Any of jezzies happen to reside in Lower Mainland, BC?

ZoeStars

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: Well, that's not very polite at all. I might have to get offended now.

The Jezebelles and Jezebeaus are just shooting the breeze around here. We're not trying to hurt you with our conversation. Why don't we agree to live and let live? We can have a barbecue on the beach, and I'll roll you a joint, and Xavoc can fill you in on zombie porn, and you can tell us about the things that you like. And we'll ask you interested questions about that, and then we'll be having a conversation.

Come on, it'll be great. It'll reinforce our sense of collective humanity. Whaddya say? I promise to leave my Squiggle Wiggle pen at home if it upsets you. See? Compromising is good for the soul!

ASmallTurnip

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Supercalifragilistic: "And our little chocolate starfishes, too."

I'm new to the JerichoNumbers (tm Xavoc) scale, but I'm pretty sure that earns you -5000 class points!

Meg

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: You sound kinda bitter and cynical buddy. But here's the deal. I would never, ever imagine telling any of my friends, male or female or anyone I DON'T KNOW that what they are doing is wrong and that they are a sad individual and sick in the head. What they choose to do in their own time is just that, THEIR CHOICE! You have no say in the matter, I have no say in the matter. And we do not have the right to judge them on any of their decisions.

Does getting oneself off with the shower head somehow hurt you emotionally? Does it offend your exremely conservative mindset? Well, here's a eye-opener for you asshat. I am a conservative polically, I am incredibly religious (and I mean, church every sunday, don't drink, smoke or do drugs, no sex before marriage, etc. Mormon am I actually) but I would never, NEVER imagine telling people how to live and how to make their choices. That is not a right reserved by me, that is their right and theirs alone. And I would never condemn them for those choices. Again, not my place.

It is men like you that make fighting for equality as women a necessary thing in this day and age. You have the right to your opinion, everyone does. But what you do not have is the right to tell us that our choices and opinions are wrong. If I want to have an amazing orgasm brought to me by the amazing maufacturers Kenwood, then that is my choice and there is nothing you can do or say about it! You can take all your "i'm so good my women will never need a toothbrush" attitude and shove it up your ASS!

P.S-have you ever run into an aunt or uncle while shopping for a sex toy? It has nothing to do with confidence mister! It has to do with all the levels of awkwardness that would bring. My cousin, not a big deal. My Uncle, my dad's brother! That's just damn awkward and nothing will ever change that, no matter how confident you are.

ZoeStars

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: Uhm, she's British sir, cunt is thrown around in the manner we say bitch. Learn to speak english, then judge.

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: P.S. Everyone knows that when translating WASP-to-English, "classy" = "repressed".

Supercalifragilistic

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: Newsflash: vibrators weren't always shaped like penises. Back in the day, it was practically heretic to create phallic-shaped objects (mostly because the patriarchical society thought much the same way you do about female sexuality - that it should be centered around "real" men only and in accord with men's dictates), so chicks used whatever was handy to get off. As society matured on the subject, it became the norm to create a phallic shaped object to do the trick and, eventually, phallic shaped objects that vibrated. But, by definition, a vibrator is something that vibrates. We don't care what the shape is; as long as it vibrates it feels great in, on and around our kitties. And our little chocolate starfishes, too.

Don't go away mad. Just go away.

Kisses,

Supercalifragilistic

Supercalifragilistic

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Xavoc: I see what you mean re: getting the last word in. So I am not going to respond.

ilikenoise

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> Uhm, has anybody mentioned pool jets? Many an afternoon I spent as a teenager by one specific section of the pool with a drooly grin on my face.

Witchtit

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @ASmallTurnip: I'm only being as judgmental as those around me. I said I wouldn't date a girl that pleasures herself with items around the house because I thought it was disgusting, and somehow I was being disrespectful, rude and everything else.
-Once again your assumptions are wrong, I'm not getting kicks hanging around this forum to see what naughty things girls do in their spare time, I couldn't give two shits to be completely honest with you, it's not like any of these girls are types I'd want to be with anyway (although some seem to think I do).

@ilikenoise is a cunt: I've clearly made a point and YOU'VE clearly responded to it on more than one occasion, so what are you talking about I have no succinct points?
- Now I have no grasp of grammer? Please, although I'd love to go through and pick out all your grammatical errors, I'm not really here to discuss that. Grow up, but than again with an online name tag like yours there's no question your immaturity.

@Xavoc: I told you I'm here defending my point, and that I'm here posting because I find it interesting that people think like you guys. At first I wanted to get outta here but now I'm just having fun, you guys are like one of those accidents that you see nad are so terrible and revolting, but for some reason you can't help to continue looking.

Perhaps you could read that post before you assume I'm just here for the last word.

Jericho114

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @ilikenoise is a cunt: Oh, a few weeks. I was drawn in by the SM article about the chocopeen. It reminded me of how insanely impossible those clone a willy kits are to use, and I just kind of stuck around.

@ASmallTurnip: Knickers? I'm sorry but according to JerichoNumbers you're not classy enough to wear knickers. Off with them!

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @ASmallTurnip: "I'm such a slut for the Bard.". Now that's MY comment of the day.

ilikenoise

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @ASmallTurnip: At this point he's just out to get the last word in. If anyone else dares reply he'll just come back and whinge some more about how he wanted to stop posting, but people keep attacking him, blah blah blah.

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @ASmallTurnip: Why thank you fellow Londoner.
@Xavoc: HA! How long have you been posting here? I've only just noticed you, and you are one of my favourites already.
@Jericho114: You have made no succinct points. You have no grasp of grammer, idioms or sense of humour. I don't want to argue with you any more. You bore me. You make no sense. You have made no valid arguments. Be gone. Leave. Go. You are the first person I have ever argued with on Jezebel. What a waste of my time.



ilikenoise

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Xavoc: Oh, you stop it with the sexy Shakespeare. I'm fresh out of clean knickers.

Okay, maybe just a little more. I'm such a slut for the Bard.

ASmallTurnip

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: I just don't get the judgemental talk, man. Why hate on what other people do if it's not hurting you? If we promised to thoroughly scrub said multi-purpose objects with antiseptic cleanser, would that make you feel better? Done. Sure. No problem. That's just good manners, and I am all about manners. Well, that and good sanitation.

But you persistently hanging around here suggests that you're actually getting your kicks thinking about all the dirty, dirty things that girls do when nobody's watching. And that's okay, because we've all got our little kinks. We're kink-positive around here. But you're being a bit rude, and that's not very gentlemanly.

So please have a little consideration for others - which is, after all, the very sexiest thing in the world, if you ask me.

ASmallTurnip

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @ilikenoise is a cunt: Point taken. Now stop responding to me then. Out of every single person that put up an argument to me here, you've all resorted to short witty messages and name calling that you giggled to before thinking you're so clever. Makes me feel pretty good, there's actually an underlying message to my post.

You don't take me seriously, well I never took you seriously either so what's your point? Oh yeah, you lost it about five posts back. Oh well though, might as well just resort to un-clever name calling, and un-witty remarks!.

Jericho114

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @ASmallTurnip: Once more into the breach, dear friends, once more;
Or close the wall up with our English toothbrushes!


Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: Yes, because vaginas are DIRTY. You can NEVER wash the filth away. You are SOILED forever. Christ. I don't think anyone here said they steal someone's toothbrush or cell phone, shove them up thier vaginas, and then slip them back. And we don't actually shove the faucet up there, either. The water goes down the drain, so no need to fear being contaminated.

Oh, and stop acting like you just fell out of the sky and landed here. If you read the blurb, then you knew what the subject was about, and chose to come here anyway.

Meg

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @ilikenoise is a cunt: That lack of imagination would never have got you through the Blitz young man is my personal Best Comment Of The Day. This Londoner salutes you! The Luftwaffe may darken our skies, but we've still got our toothbrushes. Bombs away!

ASmallTurnip

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: Zzzz... hey do you know what that sound is troll? My toothbrush.

Sorry, I just can't take you seriously.

ilikenoise

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Meg: Difference being I throw the kleenex out, I don't leave it lying around the house, and NO ONE ever touches it again.

@ilikenoise is a cunt: /wrong. My entire argument is that I don't think girls should be going around using toothbrushes and a phones vibration feature to get off. (Somehow I'm the sad and lonely one here) I PERSONALLY think that if you really need it that bad, you can go buy the appropriate tools, find a boyfriend, or use your hands like the rest of the world.

@ilikenoise is a cunt: That's the second time you've offered me the toothbrush treatment, and although the first time I saw it as humour, and actually laughed a bit, you're just creepy now. Stop calling me a troll because I have a different opinion than you. I never intentionally came to these boards and never have gone to boards to incite a riot. Although in the case I did and I'll stand by my words, it's part of what makes me so stubborn in the first place.

Jericho114

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: Hang on... is your entire argument basically that it is wrong to use an object for something other than what it was designed for? That's.. quite odd. That lack of imagination would never have got you through the Blitz young man

ilikenoise

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: I know that Kleenex says, "Let it out," but I'm pretty sure jizz-catcher wasn't the use originally intended. You're breaking your own rules! You're one of us, now!

Meg

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: Wow- even basic idioms are lost on you aren't they, troll? Come on, lets make up, I'll let you play with my electic toothbrush.

ilikenoise

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> Hopefully the troll guillotine will have been employed before then. Off with his head!

Ms. Pants

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @ZoeStars: P.S- Totally putting the Neutogena Wave on my "Want Rreally Bad" list. And if I run into my aunt or uncle when I'm buying, no embarrasment necessary. Ahahahaha. Yes.

Thanks dude, for proving my point! If your embarrassed that you buy that item for pleasuring yourself it's cause YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG! - At least when I walk into a store I have full confidence and can buy myself ANYTHING without being embarrassed because I'm cool with who I'am and how I think. I wasn't here to change minds I was here to state that what's happening is disgusting. I guess if you mean go back to my hole where I commiserate being WORK, I'll be heading there at 3 see you then!

Jericho114

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Meg: I know, I know... not classy enough to bag a guy like him =(....Next time I guess I'll just go on a a site meant for guys and talk down to all of them and then maybe I'll find out what "classy' really is!

jackimarie

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Xavoc: I don't really want to go away, this is one of the more interesting topic boards I've seen in awhile, and I'm utterly amazed at the opinions expressed at such a large scale, while the insults do nothing to deter me because you can't make me feel stupid about my opinion people are going around doing this.

No my mother wouldn't use any house hold items for herself because she, much like me knows that if you ever need something like that, there is an appropriate store and appropriate tools to do the job. You guys might be the majority in THIS specific thread but your opinions are not world wide and I thank god for that. For the record I'm not threatened by house hold items either. I guess I must be threatened by mushrooms, onions, and the like too because I don't like those?

As for the people bashing me for insults and spelling, please go away or bring a legitimate point to the table I've already mentioned it twice now, I'm insulting because I've been insulted but at lest I put a point in each post not just random insults (it's easy to do ladies). Funny how I am the bitter one taking this to heart, considering its all you guys up in arms, while I'm actually laughing at this thread and you guys (if you wanna stick foreign objects around your area to do the trick feel free), don't worry about my anger, cause it doesn't exist and your certainly not going to raz it over a little internet comment.

@Ms. Pants: No I haven't used soap thanks, quite frankly I have no problems getting the job done without. Maybe I should instead of using Kleenex when I'm done, I could go around finding household items that are suitable alternatives (Tabletops, Plates, cups!). Then when I'm dating girls I can go around filling up dishes with little surprises. Or I could make a list, compile it and put it on here as journalism.

@Ms. Pants:
Good call with the mountain dew that shits the best. Not such a big fan of the corn nuts though and WTF is a dungeon master, and why does he want corn nuts and mountain dew?

@ilikenoise is a cunt: What!? Hook, bike, what the fuck are you smoking?

Jericho114

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: Duuuuuude. With an attitude like that, it's no idea you're probably alone and bitter.

Fact: Having the closed-minded attitude that you have will only ever result in all people around you wanting to have nothing to do with you, chachi. Grow-up, realize that some people like it different and that there's nothing you can do about it. And that going off about it on a thread where everyone's going "YES!" to the topic, really isn't going to change anyone's mind, it's just going to offend people. So go back to your own little hole where you can commiserate all by your lonesome, which is apparenly what you do all the time anyway.

P.S- Totally putting the Neutogena Wave on my "Want Rreally Bad" list. And if I run into my aunt or uncle when I'm buying, no embarrasment necessary. Ahahahaha. Yes.

ZoeStars

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> I have learned so much! I only ever use my hand, and that gets kinda old sometimes. And there's the fact that I'm scared to go buy a vibrator cause the chances of me running into someone I know, or someone who knows my parents, are VERY high. Seriously. Small cities are really not that great. But tonite, my electric toothbruch and I will be having some F-U-N. And the end of my toothbrush is coincedentaly, oval-shaped. Coincedence? I think not.

ZoeStars

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Ms. Pants: Hey now, don't be insulting corn nuts. It's all about the funyuns.

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: honey, your opinions might hold a bit more clout if you had a better handle on grammar. If you can't figure out the usage of your/you're, then you're the moron and your opinion is worthless.

And like you've never used soap (which I believe is a household item) to whack your tack. Pssh. Run along kiddo. The dungeon master needs mountain dew and corn nuts.

Ms. Pants

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Meg: Well, at least I am in good company in my sad, sick state of sexual depravity. We can all be un-classy pathetic ladies together!

whynotshesaid

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: um, not to be all clichéd, but, your mother. you know? and i don't necessarily mean that as an insult as much as a fact. because your mother TOTALLY has done the faucet or washing machine thing. all ladies try it out.

Slut Machine

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @whynotshesaid: Well, maybe if you weren't at home, having non-Jericho114-sanctioned sex, by VIOLATING HOUSEHOLD OBJECTS, you'd be able to experience his (and ONLY HIS) love. Unfortunately, you are a disgusting, sad, desperate, and lonely loser. And by "sad" I mean sick in the head. Which, is a FACT, in my opinion.

Meg

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Meg: Me too! I'm totally heartbroken over the fact that I will never get to have sex with Jericho114. He sounds like he'd be such a sensitive, attentive, open-minded lover, I'm sure I will be so deprived without his touch.

whynotshesaid

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> How many class points do you lose if you use the word classy? I'd say a bazillion.

trikitixa

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> "you wouldn't stand a chance of bagging a guy like me"
"making myself into the typical pussy whipped bitch that most men turn out to be"

Aw, I'm sad that I went to bed and missed such fine examples of CLASs!


Meg

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> Omg, you guys, I heard there was a website! On the Internet! Called Jezebel! And it says "Celebrity, Sex, Fashion: Without Airbrushing"!

I am totally surprised and alarmed that there is honest discussion about sex toys on it! ON THE INTERNET

NOTHING could have prepared me for a website that says it is about "celebrity, sex, and fashion" in an honest discussion setting, let alone having it sometimes be about sex. MY MIND IS BLOWN

Also I am really upset because there is never anything out-of-the-mainstream, ever, on any Gawker website, ever, and here you guys are talking about DIY ways of pleasuring yourself. NOBODY on the Gawker universe ever does anything but missionary-style sex with the lights off. Y'all must be a bunch of fucking dykes.

(Also I am totally buying that Neutrogena thing tomorrow.)

tscheese

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> I swam for 11 years and a swimming prop led me to the electronic toothbrush solution: silicone swim caps. Wrap the toothbrush head in it. Not too difficult.

I don't have any insanely funny stories about this, but I will borrow one from my college roommates little sister. Oooh, and this one includes not just discovering masturbation, but a healthy dose of Catholic guilt too! Here goes:

Mom of roommate was wondering where her back massager was. Didn't turn up for 6 months, and then, mysteriously, the cord was cut off. Little sister confessed to middle sister only that she was "tempted" and had removed the cord. Some more prodding revealed that she had been getting off quite regularly, as to not be tempted to be involved with boys, so they wouldn't tempt her to have sex. (Does your head hurt now?) Well, before she was confirmed, she had went on a retreat and realized that the Catholics also frown heavily upon masturbation.... thus leading to the cutting of the cord.

The best part was that last Easter, my roommate and the middle sister told the story to her mom and I at the mall. Little sister was SO pissed when mom had a little "chat" with her afterwards!!!

engelfluglen

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> It's always so fucking hilarious when trolls say that you know nothing about them, but they know EVERYTHING about you. Umm... I'm pretty sure you can't tell how classy someone is untill you meet them a few times.
Fact.


eraserheadpixies (now representing norwegian xanax and JESUS!1!@#!)

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> welcome back slut machine! also...i used to babysit a teething baby who had a vibrating teething ring.

i stole it.

geisha1010

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @J.D.Regent: oh my god, i had one of those pens. too bad i didn't think of using it like that back then.

jemstarr

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: the Spanish inquisition came asking for you.

Claystil

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> Playstation oontroller....Tony Hawk 1....world's longest rail grind.

Lowti

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @ThaKadinskyPapers: Snobby Unicorns and Rape-y Cabals?

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @J.D.Regent: jesus christ, i'm gone for a few and look what happens. despite my spelling shit out there is name calling and snobby behavior. is it cabals and rape-y unicorns next, or the other way around?

ThaKadinskyPapers

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> I think maybe crossposting stuff from Jezebel to Gizmodo isn't such a good idea. It seems to be traumatic for some of them.

nerdsausage is a busysausage

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: Actually, my advice isn't based around impressing all women, or even many women. Just the women I choose to date or involve myself with.

As for the day I come home to use something your daughter thought would be acceptable? Perhaps you've already used something your mother had lying around your house as a child.

So, basically you're threatened so much by household objects that you need to insult people. Including insinuating I'm some sort of pussywhipped bitch. You keep feeling the need to defend your uninformed opinion with insults, and then get your panties into even more of a bunch when your opinion isn't thought highly of.

People would leave you be if you'd just have the dignity and grace to shut up and go away.

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> i just wrote a post about the vibrating qualities of the Neutrogena Wave here:
[weinerdog.wordpress.com]

weinerdog

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114:

"I got side tracked from a regularly clean and normal website to this hole"

Well we have enjoyed having you in our hole, now fuck off. Go on, sling your hook. On your bike.

ilikenoise

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Xavoc: Let me make this simple for you then.

Pleasuring yourself with household items -1000 class.

My statements were not uninformed, they were opinion. I got side tracked from a regularly clean and normal website to this hole, was confused about the topic and gave my opinion. When I say "sad" I don't mean depressed, I wasn't making any assumptions, I meant it in a more sick in the head, messed up type of way which in my OPINION is true.

Damn, I really can't wait till the day you guys come home to use something your daughter thought would be acceptable to pleasure herself with, that maybe you didn't think was ok and now have to deal with it. If your not old enough to buy things for pleasuring yourself either wait or use you hand like the rest of the world.

BTW as for your tips: Thanks but no thanks, they sound like just the things I'd do if my life revolved around impressing all women and making myself into the typical pussy whipped bitch that most men turn out to be.

Jericho114

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @cde: You mean the part where a good bdsm session is basically like being on drugs from the endorphin high and sensory play?

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @stefzizzle: Vibrator bombs, you say. Well, this article may be of interest to you. It was all over Australian news for weeks: [www.orangepower.com] It was later revealed the vibe-drop offender was in fact a male who binned the device in an attempt to rid himself of it before passing through security. Apparently his 'mates' gave it to him as a goodbye gift joke.

Sure that old chesnut.

"Sorry Mr. Security Officer. This isn't really my vibrator. My friends gave it to me... as a joke!"

Lindie

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @J.D.Regent: I'm Ron Burgundy, you stay classy Jezebel Dykes!

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> HA HA HA HA what the fuck happened to this thread?

Please don't ever mistake yourself for a classy, you fucking dykes.

J.D.Regent

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: Things you have no fucking clue about eh?

Let's quote you shall we?

If that describes your girlfriend perhaps you need a little more practice (If you are female than your a sad individual.

How would you know if they need more practice, or if they're a 'sad' individual. Did it ever occur to you that not every woman is able to get off in the same manner?

Oh, and here's another tip for you. There are a goodly number of women who do not like vibrators. Perhaps they feel more comfortable with a device that isn't shaped like a rainbow colored inch worm with a face on it.

Instead of asking the question of why a woman would use such objects (IE: not old enough to walk into a sex shop and purchase such a device), you've declared them unfit as women and lacking class. Really you know nothing about them, their level of class, or motivations.

There's nothing to defend, you made an uninformed statement that was poorly worded, and incited a response.

Do yourself a favor. Show your posts here to your girlfriend, and ask her what her opinion is. It might be a real eye opener.

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: Oh do stop flirting with us troll.

ilikenoise

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: The internet was designed for military and academic use. So gtfo.

cde

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @ASmallTurnip: Ha. Well, my fondness of rough stuff is, and I'm not kidding, probably directly related to me being punished like that as a kid (Belt, switch, etc.), biting as part of fascination of vampires and werewolves, scratching... well, scratching just feels damn good.

Like Xavoc's women being able to tense up against something, I get that too. Both during and after a good lay. Afterwards, I just tense my body, and stretch out for a god 15 minutes. Handcuffs help with that. (My first rule, never let someone handcuff me to something if I'm not sober enough to pick my way out of my cuffs [and only my cuffs].... Some close calls with that >_>)

Am I a sadist or masochist? Well, neither, and both. I enjoy the biting, the scratching, the grabbing to a point, and enjoy doing the same as long as she enjoys it. If she doesn't get turned on by me biting her, whats the point of me biting her, no? On the same measure, once it stops being enjoyable, I tell her to stop scratching (on that part of the body anyway). Speaking of which, while I do like that pain, there are things I wouldn't do to her. Choking, hiting (smacking anything other then her ass, I'm not so sure, I'm iffy on that, morally). But I would let her do that to me.

Re: ice play, an icy hand grabbing around in the middle of a moment of heat tends to send me over.

But, just to point out, with S/M type stuff, its not always just the toys or pain, its the entire sensory overload. The colors, the sounds, the sight or the illusion that it's real. Sometimes, most of the times, a visual and the right words are all that is needed.

Damn... I gone on a pointless rant.... Where is my mind :D

cde

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Political Party Girl: Zombie porn is an ongoing inside joke between the SO and I. So, I just tend to randomly throw it out there.

@ASmallTurnip: It's really just an example of a common "theme" people use. And sometimes laughter is the best thing to break tension.

And, everyone has a kink. Whether it's a Prada bag or a leather harness.

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @whynotshesaid: Hey umm you don't have to read my comments, if you don't like my opinion and you have nothing more intelligent to say please take a seat to the side and the let the adults talk now, k?

If everyone had such a problem with what I'm saying and didn't want me here they would stop responding and ignore me like everyone's been taught but now I'm here defending my point of view from a bunch of name calling bigots.

When I hear an opinion which I disagree with on the internet, (It happens all the time because remember we all think differently) I like to respond with facts and opinions that pertain to the story being discussed not make references to things I have absolutely no fucking clue about. (ex. How I MUST be single, or how I MUST be angry and spiteful to ALL women)

I say "dildo's" and other personal pleasuring devices are okay because they were designed to do that job, where as a cell phone was designed to receive calls simple enough. When apple designed the new I-phone they certainly weren't thinking about the vibration being used for something so raunchy (They probably JOKED about it). Whether you agree with that is up to you guys, no need for name calling. PERSONALLY I don't think my spouse should need those either, but I consider myself an accepting guy.

@jackimarie: I know your being sarcastic, but HA! Please hun, you wouldn't stand a chance of bagging a guy like me. Cause' despite my opinion on objects around the house being used for personal pleasure not being the favorite amongst women in this thread. I'm not cocky but I can GUARENTEE you'll never find a guy that isn't just lying through his teeth for a little of your vagina, just like all the others you've probably been with. I'm more honest than 100% of the guys you'll ever meet, that's why I'm not and never have been stuck in a shit hole relationship where I have to pleasure myself and when I find a girl that isn't half as much of a tool as you she won't need toys either. Please don't ever mistake yourself as a classy. You don't know classy.

Jericho114

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Political Party Girl: Beautiful, kinky snowflakes. I love it. I like to think that I too am a beautiful kinky snowflake, even if I don't score very high on the Kink Scale. I kink in my own quiet way! I revel in in my low-key kinkage!

Kink on, bitches. Kink on.

ASmallTurnip

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> This guy sounds like a tool. A tool who can't get women off and has only ever had vanilla sex. If that. Sucks to be you, Jericho114!

buggeroff

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> I think the giggle factor is too high for me. You say "cheerleader", and I think...well, I can't complete the thought because I'm laughing too hard. I love that role-playing gets other people off, but I just feel silly and decidedly unsexy even contemplating it.

But ain't it rockin' that we can talk about it?

Thanks for letting me in to your sexy-time closet for a moment. I really, really appreciate it. Now go do nefarious and naughty things to your lucky lady, who knows how to make full use of a hairbrush.

As for me, it's toothbrush time. Only, you know, not in the sexy way. Which is sad.

'Night, freaks. It's been real.

ASmallTurnip

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Xavoc: Ahh, a wise choice. And zombie and tentacle porn? One good thing about fetishes/kinks is that you can always find someone out there with one you've never heard of. We are all beautiful, kinky snowflakes.

Political Party Girl

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Political Party Girl: I prefer to use "FLÜGGÅƏNK∂€ČHIŒβØL∫ÊN" instead.

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @ASmallTurnip: Well, what is it you'd like to know?

There are so many different kinks, interests, tricks. Perhaps you'd like to be tied to a table and painted in chocolate fondue. Or vice versa. Ice cubes or a pyrex toy left in the freezer can be used to create temperature play sensations.

Maybe you've done roleplay where you're the cheerleader and he's the dirty old teacher. You've been caught cheating, and he's going to bend you over your 'desk' and spank you as punishment.

Or insert your own ideas. D/s behavior can be as simple as him agreeing to be your sex slave for the day, and you tying his hand behind his back, grabbing him by his hair, and leading his face where you want it to go.

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Xavoc: My safe word is "Bjork." (Sorry, couldn't help myself.)

Also, someone needs to give Jericho114 grammar lessons on the difference between "your" and "you're." You know, maybe after the lessons on human sexuality.

Political Party Girl

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Xavoc: @cde: **Chin in cupped palms, eyes like saucers** Go on.

ASmallTurnip

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @cde: Being a recovering cathaholic I can say she likely is a complete sexual deviant. You just have to get her past her shame and guilt from the upbringing.

As I said earlier, a typical woman will not get her severe freak on if she plans on keeping you around unless you get past the guilt and fear of rejection later.

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @ASmallTurnip: Well, I'm not really a sadist or a masochist. Pain can be good, but it isn't really where my interests lie per se. You would think a flogger would be painful, but depending on how it's made, and what it's made of, and how you throw the implement it can be more like a heavy back massage instead.

My favorite restraints are not leather, they're neoprene. They tend to be more comfy and forgiving when you start to sweat. Plus they're washable. As to how effective it would be? In my experience women tend to orgasm harder when they have something to use to tense their muscles against. Such as pulling on restraints. Not sure? Tie some ropes to the corners of the bed and just try holding on to them w/ your hands instead first.

As to how long I've known? About 4 years now. Prior to that I was moderately prudish and married to a woman who had basically no interest in sex at all.

I don't worry about scaring women off. If they bolt, then that's fine. It's pretty much a requirement for me to be happy in my sex life. Not everyone is up for it, and I understand that. Truth is most people engage in BDSM type behaviors in bed all of the time. Biting, scratching, spanking, tying up w/ scarves, holding hands behind the back, pulling hair, blindfolds. These are all basics in BDSM. Usually they're too curious to bolt, and I'm not out to force myself or prolivivities upon others

It really comes down to trust, honesty, and stopping when told to do so. Some people use safe words, I just simply take "stop, no, and don't" to always mean exactly that.

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> Those Venus Vibrance razor things? I don't know why the hell I would want a vibrating razor, but take the blade off (derrrr) and it's a moderately powerful, not-too-pointy, and quiet vibrator. I actually tried buying a real vibe and went back to that because a real one made too much noise for my thin-walled house and paranoid brain...

dissolver

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @ASmallTurnip: Not that I'm Xavoc or anything, but I tend to find that I hang around with girls (goths/gawths, rivet heads, Alt/Synth/Techno-y), that are into the same rough stuff that I am. So for me, it's the norm. Like you, I find the whole prim and proper on the outside, super freaky on the inside dichotomy interesting. (Like wishing that cute redheaded catholic school girl was a complete sexual deviant that would put Spitzer to shame) It makes no sense (to me)

cde

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Xavoc: I have to admit that I find BDSM pretty intimidating. I think it's the accessories.

I mean, rough sex can be great. The Boyfriend has been the recipient of more than a few mid-coital kidney punches, but I swear they were accidental. The whole pleasure-pain dichotomy makes sense to me. But there seems to be a level of, well, commitment in hard-core S/M that I have trouble getting my head around. Plus, I bruise very easily. In both the literal and figurative senses.

I have no idea how I would react if The Boyfriend pulled out the leather restraints. I'm not sure I'd be okay with going there, although I don't know for sure, having never been asked.

Have you always known that the kinky stuff gets you off? Did it worry you that you might not find someone whose particular interests matched your own? I'm really sorry if I'm asking impertinent questions, but I just find it so damn interesting. I mean, how do you have that conversation about some of your wilder proclivities without worrying that you're going to scare off that awesome chick you'd like to spank?

ASmallTurnip

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @cde: I wonder if prehensile tentacles falls on Jericho's allowed or not allowed list...

Tentacle porn is alright w/ me. But really I think I said zombie porn. Hehe

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Xavoc: Then, trust me, you are not interested. For most people, tentacle porn and squids should stay animated... :D

cde

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: Wow. So a woman is not classy unless she has your permission to orgasm.

And approved vibrators/dildos have a pass in your book, but other massagers, showerheads and objects are not. Because otherwise, what a woman does in her own home on her own time need your approval. Because women aren't sexual beings with needs or autonomy over their bodies.

You sound like you think sex is disgusting unless it's done in bed. And I assume you never masturbate, since you've got such impeccable self control. Or if you do, you must use lube, never spit or lotion.

KidPresentable

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @cde: I'm not really asking, but you have me severely curious though.

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> what about the hot tub jet streams??

adina

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Xavoc: You.... arn't really asking, are you? Cause I... well. Lets put it this way. I don't think Jezebel and her denizens would appreciate 4chan linking.

PM me if you're serious >_>

@ASmallTurnip: If you want mostly safe zombie porn, go look for Burning Angel's Re-Penetrator. Its a porn spoof of Lovecraft like Reanimator.

cde

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> dammit, where is the 'flag comment' button when you need it??

JAY1937

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: It's weird that you're ranting against women being able to find pleasure with household items/getting off without sex with their significant other... on a site with almost all female commentors. Anyway, I'm sure you dick is WAY too big and your insightful opinions get you tons of ass. Don't worry, no one would ever think otherwise! I thought I was a classy girl but I guess I'll never have a chance with a guy like you =( Oh well...

jackimarie

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @ASmallTurnip: Hahaha, ask nicely and drunkenly enough and the gf would probably offer to tie you up herself.

My collection isn't really so scary. I'm not out to seriously injure anyone. ;) You just pick up knowledge as you go.

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> the man wondered why i insisted on keeping my sonicare brush over his (aptly named for the occasion) oral b. no pulsing, but a vibe that delivers every time. they could put that old "does she...or doesn't she?" tagline to good use. bonnes vacances, bonnes sensations!

thatgirlinnewyork

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Xavoc: Hee! Uncontrollable, sustained laughter here. Oh, my tummy! That is awesome.

I want to have a Jezebel movie night and watch zombie porn with you guys. And eat popcorn. And drink an inappropriate ammount of alcoholic beverages with paper umbrellas in them. And sneak into Xavoc's bedroom and check out his extensive and slightly-scary collection of bondage gear. Because I'm incredibly nosy like that.

ASmallTurnip

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: I am desperate and alone. I shamelessly own that title, and would rather be desperate for an orgasm and alone, looking fondly at my toothbrush than spend another minute being groped by a man who has the audacity to admonish me for "lacking self control" and then half heartedly apologizes when he finishes first and rolls over to sleep.

That being said I totally miss his beard and having the bristles on that toothbrush... it doesn't bother me at all. But alas, when it was good it was very very good and when it was bad, it was horrid. Excuse the poor grammar but asshats make me wordy and impatient. I'm looking forward to finally commenting on the articles I read here.

volcanoesmeltme

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @ilikenoise is a cunt: I can't say all of them are, but I do actively work to educate my friends whenever they ask for advice.

I'm not perfect by any means, but I'm well aware of who I am and what I have to offer my mate.

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> if you have to use a toothbrush just stick a rubber eraser on the end and buzz away - but the ol bathtub never fails moi.

Vaginaisnotadirtyword

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @ASmallTurnip: Well you know, porn, featuring zombies. Only, replace Brains with whatever it is said zombie is supposed to be craving in that installment.

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Xavoc: If all boys in Iowa are like this, I am moving to Iowa. From England.

ilikenoise

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @whynotshesaid: Yes, yes she is, and I am very lucky to have her. The mutual worship seems to work out well. =)

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Xavoc: Zombie porn? Zombie porn?

I ache to be enlightened.

ASmallTurnip

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: Again, just because someone masturbates doesn't mean they are unhappy with their partners, need to work out something, or are being dishonest. I think it's funny that you need to be in control of your classy girl's every pleasure. And if you have to tell us how lonely, desperate, and disgusting we are, could you at least wait until business hours, so you have a chance at winning worsties?

Meg

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: Here's a few tips for you. Write them down, you'll need these later.

Rule number 1: All women want to get their severe freak on. They've likely had fantasies about marriage for a big part of their life. Why would their fantasies about sex be any less involved?

Rule number 2: Women will not get their severe freak on with anyone they intend to keep around unless that person actively goes out of their way to not make them feel ashamed for being sexual.

Rule number 3: Thou shalt not insult a woman for having a kink you do not approve of. No matter how major or minor the kink. if it doesn't match you, quietly take your leave and go somewhere else. They tend to have enough hang-ups about sex without your help.

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: Blah blah blah blah are you gone yet?

whynotshesaid

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Xavoc: "insecure about himself in a rather severe way": you just described my ex to a T.

BTW, your lady is very lucky to have a dude like you.

whynotshesaid

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> This actually is my last comment.

@ASmallTurnip: Yes you're right I could have dropped my comment and left, but you're also right again, I followed up on a forum I accidently posted in, my bad. Other than that your post is like many, irrelavent to the conversation. I never once said women were disgusting. I love them, in fact could not live without them. On the other hand ones that use my toothbrush handle, the remote, a cell phone, or a bath faucet are.

I already said I had no problems with the tools designed to pleasure women, it's when you resort to household items that I feel it's wrong. That's my opinion, which for some reason is a sin to defend lest I be told my dick is small and I suck at sex or to leave the forum. (And you wonder why my posts have such a negative undertone)

@whynotshesaid: I said that in response to your snooty LOST comment. It sounds to me like you're the one "faking it" to rush over to a television show, sorry.. No television show is that important to me or any of my girlfriends I hope, definatly not worth rushing one of lifes greatest pleasures.

Jericho114

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @cde: Nah, if you can't figure out a use or an applicable kink, you're not exercising your brain enough... ;)

Now if only they'd make more zombie porn...

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @cde: Heh, he says he gets 'jealous' and that he wants in on the action. I'm always more than happy to oblige. :)

whynotshesaid

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @whynotshesaid: Yeah, I've never had that hangup. I don't understand why a man would unless he were insecure about himself in a rather severe way.

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @whynotshesaid: Re: your bf & you getting off on toys. He gets off on watching, doesn't he...

Damn ununique fetish of mine >_<

:P

cde

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Xavoc: haha you're ok it's just jericho kinda ruined your guys' rep.

nodoubt9203 [אִיזָבֶל]

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Xavoc: Wouldn't it be easier/more fun to identify the things that couldn't be used as a toy... And why...

cde

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @ASmallTurnip: Maybe someone should let him know that BOBs are household items.

cde

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Xavoc: My ex was all weird about it. He didn't want me to masturbate unless he was around to watch. He had a lot of rules about the Right Way to Orgasm and the Wrong Way to Orgasm. Seeing as though my philosophy is that Any Orgasm is a Good Orgasm, it pretty much goes without saying that the sparks in the bedroom faded pretty quickly.

whynotshesaid

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: Actually, she stated her boyfriend didn't have that issue. It was her ex husband.

Now, maybe it's just me but I view toys as an enhancement to the bedroom. Whether it's a spatula or a device designed specifically for use in the bedroom. Not as a detraction or replacement for what I am or am not doing well. I have a healthy sex life, that contains open communication, humor, and a woman I adore immensely.

That having been said, you came into this thread and immediately insulted every woman who posted in the thread and called them desperate. Yet you have the testicular fortitude to admonish them for responding in a not quite so gracious manner? Perhaps you should ask your gf if she has ever used non sexual devices to get off. I'm guessing she has, and it has nothing to do with how classy she is or is not.

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: Dude, did you read my other posts? He gets me off just fine sans electric tools. He also likes that I use the electric tools and actually gets turned on by it. Sheesh. Your reading comprehension is on par with your bedroom abilities.

Let me echo everyone else and say kindly fuck the hell off.

whynotshesaid

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114:Okay, let's go over this so I can get it straight:

You've wandered over here to tell us how repulsive we are? Really? You've read 200+ comments detailing sexual practices you find absolutely disgusting and unnatural? And then commented yourself? And then checked back to see if anyone has replied to your verbal wagging finger? And then responded again?

Because from where I'm sitting, you don't look a lot like someone who finds this talk abhorrent. No, you look a lot like someone who gets their jollies telling women how disgusting they are. And hey, that's okay. Whatever floats your boat, man.

But don't imagine for a single second that we don't see exactly what you're doing here, and how it gets you all hot and bothered. We've seen your kind before, and we'll see it again. Such is life. But at least the women on this site have enough courage and humour to own up to what gets them off.

ASmallTurnip

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: Look, sweetheart, we don't feed the trolls around here.

But if you fancy a go, I got a plunger and I don't use lube, so call me.

ilikenoise

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: So I guess I shouldn't sit down on a chair, or lay in bed ever again. God forbid I get my disgusting vagina on something, because it's totally fucking poisonous and will, like, give you Sars.
Just shut the fuck up and go away.


eraserheadpixies (now representing norwegian xanax and JESUS!1!@#!)

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @whynotshesaid: I'm sorry your boyfriend can't get you off.

I'm sorry all of you that I have offended. But I just dont see why anyone would have to go beyond vibrators and what not, to get the love and attention you truly want. Is there a time that you didn't have something to pleasure yourself with but saw the vibrating phone and thought it to be a suitable replacement? If you answered yes to this question, YOU ARE DESPERATE AND ALONE.

Having a girl that views every pointy object around the house as a sex toy IS something I'd rather not have, no matter how much you guys tries to begrate my sexuality and the size of my dick because of it. I'll take a classy girl any day, one that can be honest and tell me if I'm not getting her off, that way I can work with her to perhaps make the sex life better. (without the plastic third party) I know that's rare these days.. to work things our amongst each other.

When you can back up with fact that I suck in bed because I don't like these habits in a girl I'm all ears, until then keep your opinions to yourself, you'd be better suited that way.

Jericho114

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @nodoubt9203 (Stalk Me I'm Icelandic): I originally came over from Giz. So, we're not all bad.

@whynotshesaid: I've also met several women whose husbands/bfs were intimidated if not abusive and angry about the use of toys, let alone the woman masturbating. And, well. When the woman goes months between orgasms, they're not happy creatures.

Personally I appreciate a woman who can wander through a bed bath and beyond identifying the things that can be used as sex toys as she goes. Self control my ass, I want a woman who is capable of being shameless whore.

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Xavoc: Yes, he is quite talented in that regard. :)

But you are right - it is very much a headspace thing. At least for me, it is. If I am not turned on, I am not going to come. It sounds stupid and elementary when I type it out, but I didn't actually make the connection until I had been having sex for several years.

whynotshesaid

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> Someone is blocking Jericho soon, right? Total buzzkill.

I have a magic wand with attachments, but I'm on board with it being too loud and too strong. The detachable showerhead hasn't been successful for me, but I'll give the faucet a shot. Thanks for the tip!!

Jaztea

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> i'd ignore this guy, he got linked by gizmodo.

nodoubt9203 [אִיזָבֶל]

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @desylicious: That is understandable. Or, as my uncle said to me once upon a time. "Son, playing pool is like making love to a woman. Sometimes you need to ease it in softly and slowly, and sometimes you need to just jam it home."

@whynotshesaid: Yeah, funny how that works. The other catch in regards to women who have difficulty getting off? In my experience, typically the more often they get off, the easier it is for them. Mostly it's really just a matter of getting into their head. Looks like your BF has that one down. ;)

Xavoc

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: Yes, because god forbid you have a girlfriend who actually gets off, instead of faking it so she can get back to watching "Lost."

Seriously, dude, why not just tattoo "I suck in bed" on your forehead?

whynotshesaid

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: What? You sound really angry (and controlling) about the whole thing and I'm wondering if it's the household objects that are a threat to you, or if you're against masturbation, in general? You know it is possible to have a great sex life with a partner, and also enjoy solo sessions.

Meg

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @Jericho114: Out damn spot!

ilikenoise

]]> <![CDATA[5 Household Items That Will Help You 'Get Off' Easy]]> @ASmallTurnip: How did anything I say have anything to do with a genital INSECURITY? Get your mind out of the gutter for once in your life. (And please speak to me in real English I'm not 10 years old)

@whynotshesaid: By dumping her I'd be doing myself a favour also by not having a girlfriend that thinks she needs to fuck inadament objects to get off, that's why I would be doing it, your pointless reply was not needed.

I feel as though I've stepped into a twilight zone in this forum, unfortunatly I didn't notice I was forwarded to this thread from another site before making a post. No one that's manages a response ha