<![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i> - Jezebel Comments]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i> - Jezebel Comments]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @GoodMorningAngels: In other words - yes, women can be insanely possessive too. I just didn't think we'd go through Title IX to demonstrate it. *wink*

@spaceman7: I'm flattered that you agree. Also, you're a douche. But aside from that, considering that there will always be shrill voices coming from the land of too-many-cats, the solution here lies in your own outlook of the world. There are ladies out there who make the world a wonderful place, it's up to you to find them and charm them. You'll have to get past your tendency to tear people down first, and I'll leave it to you as an exercise to figure out if you're just chronically cynical and insecure, or if you have sociopathic dating tendencies. But hey, the nice thing is, you're numb to the pain either way. At least for the moment, anyway.

BrianVan

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @BrianVan: I agree. One of the3 voices of reason here.

This list and the comments are hilarious!

Whine, whine, whine. Complain, complain, complain. Another 3 glasses of Merlot. Another pound of Dark Chocolate. Complain to your 15 cats. Complain about what men do. Complain about what they don't do. Complain about bros before hos when you get upset at him dissing your friends. Complain that men aren't Mind Readers. Complain about men not doing what you do. Complain about infidelity after you bitch about 'Entitlement' (oh, ok. -So I should go fuck your sister, is what that meant???) Complain that men don't do what you don't do.

No wonder the dating world is so screwed up with such hypocritical, double-talking chicks in it, complaining about everyone else's Double-Standards but their own.

->The whole while of course, each and every one of you here is 100% perfect, sinless, saintly and built like Salma Hayek.

Well done, 'ladies'.

wonkydonky

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @BrianVan: Just a point of logic re: your discussion with exelizabeth.

You say, "Sadly, the "hard wired" for entitlement is an absolutely observable phenomenon" and then go on to describe just how common the sense of entitlement is. (and seriously, good for you for recognizing this last part!) My logic issue is that a phenomenon being widespread is not proof that the phenomenon is innate.

To take a parallel example, in the 1960s, it was widely believed, based on evidence of the moment, that girls could not like sports. Boys were "hard-wired" for it, girls were not, and the proof was that almost no girls wanted to play youth sports. Just a few decades later, girls in the U.S. now play youth sports at rates nearly matching those of boys.

Just because things are one way now doesn't mean biology determined it.

GoodMorningAngels (makes me Charlie)

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @cde: re: what does "tasting like death" even mean, yeah, I have no idea either. I tried not to think about it too hard. Big mistake. Pretending it wasn't so bad just meant I gave him more opportunities to be equally worthless.

What was someone saying earlier about rock-bottom standards? Sigh.

GoodMorningAngels (makes me Charlie)

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> This list is wonderful.

browneyedarling

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @GoodMorningAngels: I do agree with you, completely. The sentiment is extraordinarily juvenile, but unfortunately the phrase is now common parlance, a quote which is often said somewhat ironically. (Did you ever know a guy who would not rush out the door of a club without even a glance at his male friends, if a potential partner offered sex? Applies to straights, and even more so to gays. So, in reality, it's hoes before bros.) That said, it's rarely used in the context of serious relationships. The context is usually, "I can't hook up with my fraternity brother's ex-girlfriend who he dated for 2 weeks." And even then, it's wrong.

As for reciprocation, I think it is necessary on a much deeper level than oral sex. It's a bit shallow to make oral sex the basis of understanding in a bond between two people. But hey, it's an indicator. If someone's selfish in bed, they're probably selfish in a lot of other ways, too.

@exelizabeth: Sadly, the "hard wired" for entitlement is an absolutely observable phenomenon. Even the most sane men get possessive. They're never cool with the new boyfriends, they throw Hail Mary passes at girls when interest slips, they think sex is a privilege that continues (or is at least reasonably requested) after a breakup, they think that female-initiated breakups are simply poor decisions on the female's part... it's tragic. Really, a vast majority of men that think this way, even if for only brief periods under stress. Again, I'm sorry, for all of us. Please love us anyway.

@snarkhunting: I agree that a fair effort should be made. But I counter with this: if you're giving oral just to get it, and the man really hates giving it, and he's suffering even to attempt it, then that's not a good situation. So let him try something else to get you off. I'm sure that he wants to. And if he doesn't want to do ANYTHING to get you off, then he's a douche and I don't know why you'd put up with that. Dress and leave immediately, preferably right as he's about to come. That'll learn 'em. (Note: that is the most wicked thing to do to a man, other than amputating his penis, and I'm almost sorry I mentioned it.)

BrianVan

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @BrianVan: Okay, being "not into oral" is fine. As long as that guy is totally into not receiving it, too.

What's good for the goose and all that. Calling reciprocity "generosity" is a sign of entitlement. Just FYI.

snarkhunting

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> you actually view me as more than just, as you so charmingly put it, a "cum dumpster."

Ugh, a friend of mine, or maybe a former friend, got his 22 year old girlfriend to wear a shirt that said "John's C.D." on the back this weekend. I reamed him out in the middle of a bar for being so disrespectful of her. He said "I'd never disrespect her. She was okay with it. I love her!" I told him the shirt was disrespectful even if she was a moron.

lucyjae

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> Not sure about reciprocation (or lack thereof) being a 'dudely sin' ... struggling to recall sleeping with a woman who actually gave as much oral as I did...

WildTurkey

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> How about when you and your kinda-sorta bf have been using condoms for the entire 2.5 months you've been dating exclusively, asks you if you are on the pill, and you say, "No. Do you want me to be?" His answer? "No."

THEN WHY THE FSCK DID YOU ASK ME??!!!!

uberunderrated

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> It's a very ordinary phrase. At least 'mates before dates' doesn't imply women are 'worthless sluts'.@GoodMorningAngels:

WildTurkey

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> Re: Wandering eye. Seven Billion People? (Geez, 7 already? 5~10 years ago books listed 6.2 billion. Has the Chinese been fucking that much?) I'm pretty sure most guys don't want to fuck all 7 billion, for obvious reasons...

cde

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @GoodMorningAngels: Tasted like death? Wtf does that even mean?

cde

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @GoodMorningAngels: Plenty of women do it. The whole "I can have any one I want" kind of thinking.

cde

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @BrianVan: Just so you know, the "we're hard wired for it" excuse is the last refuge of utter douchebags, and it's almost never even true when it comes to stuff like how you treat women; that's socialization, baby. You're hard wired to pee, you're not hard wired to be a dick.

Re: Wandering eye, Moe did not mean checking out other people. Everyone does that, and any healthy relationship can accommodate that. She meant checking out other people with the implication that you're constantly looking for something better.

exelizabeth

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @AlmostZooey: Oh my gawd! He was such a keeper! Seriously. Where do you go to pick up guys? The local insane asylum?

@dianersb: What's bad for the gander is bad for the goose? Hell yeah! I can relate, having ex-girlfriends who have committing these same sins (especially "Entitlement".... Seriously.. "We're not in a 'relationship'; I just like to fuck you. Lots.").

"Bro's before Ho's": totally gay. I'm not knocking gay (to each their own). I'm just saying that "bro's before ho's" is pretty much the definition of gay.

Most importantly, reciprocation is most certainly not a sin. *NOT* reciprocating is a sin.

Brian Gee

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @I, SBJ, A Fucking Dyke: i know. seriously. i often wish i could just quit this whole hetero thing.

Agrado

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> Sigh. You straight girls and your rock-bottom standards. Tsk, tsk.

PS. House is HAWT.

Skinny Bone Jones

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> Matthew 7:5. Looks like secularism has at least a couple drawbacks.

drugman

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> what a great post. just what i needed today. i hate guys most of the time. the delusions of grandeur, the compartmentalization and the hormones thing, this part particularly:
"Unless we do hear that enough, and stifle our instincts and emotions and learn to choose our battles to the point that we actually get a reputation for being "chill,"
..girl i feel you!



Agrado

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> TOTALLY with you Moe on the insanity of compartmentalization! Once heard a guy I was sort of dallying with tell a whole table full of people a LENGTHY story about this woman who "tasted like death"--and he was utterly astonished to learn that this public retelling disturbed me!

He eventually had the decency to be embarrassed, but not before protesting that it was a long time ago, and that I didn't know the woman, so it wasn't so bad. Great, so for years to come you could be telling stories about me to large groups of people I don't know? ...that's definitely the way to win me over.

GoodMorningAngels (makes me Charlie)

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @BrianVan: I disagree re: Bros Before Hoes for two reasons. 1, it gets invoked in a totally unthinking way. Obviously you're going to be more loyal to the people you're closer to, but if you're sleeping with someone, she deserves SOME loyalty, not just to be ditched whenever it's convenient. 2, if it were really about loyalty (and not about saying women count less than men, period), then people would find an expression that didn't characterize the boys as family, & the girls as worthless sluts.

Disagree also Re: Reciprocation. All Moe said was that things should be equal--I think the point is precisely that that that's not "generosity", it's fairness. (See again, "entitlement"...)

I'm with you on the wandering eyes of all genders--though again on entitlement, I do wonder if men might do it more? No evidence, just speculation.

GoodMorningAngels (makes me Charlie)

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> woops, that was two days, not two weeks - still. whatever. it creeped me out.

fiatluxury

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @girlscoutcookie: holy crap! not only did my ex call me THE NIGHT MY MOM DIED after we hadn't spoken in like 6 months: he also called me 2 weeks into dating a new fellow like 6 mos after that. WTF? Maybe my major life events and his 6-month call cycle were synched? i have a friend who claims that her ex would call her every time she was masturbating. IT'S FREAKY.

fiatluxury

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> Sorry to be a dork but "Reciprocation" was the 7th... IM A GIRL AND I DID MATH!!

weeeee

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> Yeah. Right on the mark about giving head. That was my main problem with men.

kityglitr

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> Re wandering eye:

No one is more aware than most of us that any interest we take in ambient women lacks all conceivable real-world payout. The eye's actual jaunt, though, the checking out, can't be helped, man. It's pretty much physiological. Suppressing it can be excruciating. Sorry.

brassinpocket

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @katastic: Oh, they SO can. And so you break up with your boyfriend and have like two weeks of awesome, and then he decides that since you took him as your date to your sorority's party, HE shouldn't take YOU as his date to his fraternity's because people would think you were "getting too serious." And then in that same conversation asks you if you think your friend Megan would like to go with him. Bastard. Fortunately that was over two years ago and I've since moved on to someone wonderful and learned to ignore his Evil, but... ooh, it still burns. I like to think that the fact that I still like to throw sticky liquids on his car when I pass it doesn't mean I'm not over it, though.

girlscoutcookie

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> What about the "martyr"?
My dad was an expert at this one. Anytime the family was deciding what movie to go see, where to eat, or whatever else he would always have a strong opinion about what he wanted. However, as soon as someone else expressed a differing opinion he would immediately capitulate and agree to do what we wanted, all the while letting us know how disappointed he was that we didn't want to do what he wanted. Of course if we said, "no, that's cool, we can do what you want to do," he would refuse and insist we do what we wanted to do.
We love him but the man drove my mom nuts. He did learn from the expert, his mother, a conservative Catholic with six kids and a husband.

du056022

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @frumious: Girl, I'm totally on board with that one. If I had a penny for every time!

TrixieBelden

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @dianersb: Yes. This is scientific fact. The minute you lose interest in a man is the minute he keeps calling. They can smell it.

katastic

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> I just dated an "entitlement" man. He kept telling me what 'type' of girl I was.

Needless to say, we did not date for very long. He told me I was mean for telling him he was wrong, wrong, wrong.

katastic

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> Did you know that it is possible to fit all seven of those into a ten minute AIM conversation? No? Neither did I. Between this and Juicycampus, it's been quite an enlightening week for me.

mech333

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @Legalese: You know I think there might be some kind of radar out there that some guys have. Because nearly every girl I know has that ex that pops up when least expected. Either when you are just starting to fall for someone (this one is most likely to occur when you are not over said ex), or when there's another major life change. It's like they KNOW.

dianersb

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> LMAO Moe, you sound like you've dated your share of winners...so how did that date with Spencer go?

Jezebabe

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @briardahl: So very true. Makes me think that dating is just crazy, and then wonder why we do it. And then I remember all of the perks.

dianersb

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @LadyNo: Seriously, WHAT is it with guys like that? After the end of a 3 1/2 year relationship, my ex (who broke up with me on INSTANT MESSENGER, despite both of us being in our twenties) "wanted to be friends." This meant months of alternatively ignoring me/calling and making plans and then blowing them off. But you know what happened the minute I started dating my now-husband? I bet you can guess! (Note: it didn't work because I had thoroughly had enough of his crap at that point.)

Also common to this type of dude is total amazement when he can't win you back for the Nth time and finally gets told to piss off.

Legalese

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @nyobserver: The only reason I'm bad at math is my utter and complete laziness, and I am quite certain laziness affects the mens, too. So poo on the "chicks are bad at math" bullshit.

LadyNo Fondles Sweaters

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @samsquanch (formerly known as cupcakes): Amen. And it was so classic, too, like a switch being flipped!

LadyNo Fondles Sweaters

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @Lady Skittlehattington's Publicist: We are. After a period of estrangement. We were really close before it all went down and that will never be the same, obviously. He was really upset to lose me as a friend and I was like, sorry dude, that's the way it crumbles.

@frumious: He really seemed like he meant what he was saying, and I think he really did mean it, he was just so crazy, you know? But if he hadn't gotten me to break off my engagement, I probably would have married that guy. Shudder. So really, in the end I have my douchey friend to thank for my current happiness.

LadyNo Fondles Sweaters

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> As a subsection to the Wandering Eye- the "Groucho Marx Club Rule" which is as follows: "I do not want any girl that would have me for a boyfriend/SO/Partner" as demonstrated by all those little criticisms which are beyond foul (i.e, lose weight, don't cut your hair, wax (yeah- I will when you will!) Blah Blah Blah).

lolacat(ΩΜ)

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> Ehhh, I'm not feeling this one. Breakdown:
*Entitlement: Yeah, that's a shitty thing that even the supposedly "good guys" pull. We're hard wired for it. It defies rational explanation. We kinda suck for this.
*WanderingEye: Well, aside from the times when it's done in a disrespectful manner, it's just a part of the human condition. I think certain types of people, gender-regardless, do this more frequently than others; it's not just the boys and it's not all of them, either. It is not a sin to find people attractive.
*'Bros Before Hoes'-ism: When you're dealing with women who are complete strangers, your friends are a priority, absolutely. It's called "loyalty". There are less juvenile ways to express this sentiment, though.
*Compartmentalization: Sensible people don't have this problem.
*Delusions of Grandeur: AKA "This one time I knew this weird dude with a strange to-do list." Meh. Should have put "writing checks you can't keep" here.
*Hormone Bigotry: Physician, heal thyself!
*Reciprocation: Hey, can we just simplify this one by saying you like generous men? It's not a "sin" to be disinterested in oral, it's merely a disqualifying factor, and that's fair enough. (Insert clumsy mention of pussy-eating prowess here. Now THAT'S a common dudely sin!)

BrianVan

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @Anonymous Lobbyist: What a wanker. After three years, the idea that he could conceive of there being better than yourself is evidence of his unworthiness. He will be crying in his beer over you long after you've forgotten he ever existed.

Hooplehead

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> For the record: my business partner, a guy, sucks at math. His former business went bankrupt. In our current business partnership, I wear the CFO hat, and hardly need to balance my checkbook to manage both my personal and business finances.

My dad filed for bankruptcy twice. I helped bail my brother out of his gambling debts.

My mother managed to put us through college, refinanced her home to give my brother the equity to pay some of his gambling debts, and is currently continuing to bring home the bacon post-retirement age, despite not having even a high school degree (she was an immigrant in an arranged marriage).

That math/science gender myth? I beg to differ. yah.

nyobserver

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @drhouse: Oh, yeaaaaaaah......

Lady Skittlehattington

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> Bros before Hoes = UNACCEPTABLE. It's like, fine, let your BROS give you a beej then!

TeenageGangDeb

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @nolongerinacubiclebutstillawhore: Ack, me too! The current (perhaps soon to be former) dude is the most entitled I've ever met.
@frumious: And HELL YES!

TheGintheCity

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @JessicaLovejoy: Backstairsly: You might want to start with the backhair. That shit stings.
@stacyinbean: Damn, it'll have to be my D.C. game then.

Megan Carpentier

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> RE: Wandering Eye

More importantly, the vast majority of them have no interest whatsoever in boning *YOU.* Why don't they understand the simple bird in the hand principle, is all I'm askin'?

missdotparker

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> My boyfriend used the bros before hoes line on me once when defending his roomate. It was like..."EXCUSE me?"

He didn't get sex for a week. That line is utter bullshit.

Khuluna

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @Lady Skittlehattington's Publicist: Hell, I like pretending I'm Hugh Laurie. If only I had the bottomless supply of painkillers. And Robert Sean Leonard for a best friend.

drhouse

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @Anonymous Lobbyist: I want to rip his hair out strand by strand.

JessicaLovejoy: Wanton Trollop

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> Delusions of grandeur! I beg to differ, now get me a bigger horse this one makes me appear slight of stature - bigger I say! BIGGER!

Also good list, far better than the vatican one; the pope just generally pisses me off.

Tocsin

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @AlmostZooey: I told you that going to clubs every night would pay off.

Lady Skittlehattington

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @andBegorrah: that is amazing. pure genius!

@Anonymous Lobbyist: I'm stealing it too, glad you aren't in Boston anymore! I had the same EXACT thing happen to me, 3.5 years though. Even better!

stacyinbean

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @Lady Skittlehattington's Publicist: "If you faaaall I will catch you I'll be waaaaiting, time after time!"

AlmostZooey

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @LadyNo: I was going to say "he'll get his," but it looks like he already is! the guys who claim to turn on/off their love for you when they know they can't/can have you, respectively, are the worst offenders out there. to purgatory with the lot of 'em.

cupcakesofdeath

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> I love this!

Boys, I don't care if your ex-girlfriend let you come on her face EVERY TIME, that doesn't mean I'll do it the first time we sleep together! And I'm the crazy? Ohhhhh please.

NoInheritance

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @Le Kangourou de Kataroo (Bjork did it).: There's always room for one more.

@drhouse: I find your avatar so very attractive. Can I pretend you're Hugh Laurie?

Lady Skittlehattington

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @Macloserboy: oooh snickerdoodle, bless your optimistic heart. Even if she made that up, I promise some woman has had that or something equally vile happen to her. Its a scary scary world out there dating the mens.

Alohamaid

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> Thank you for Wandering Eye; I swear, every dude with a bathrobe likes to think he could be the second coming of Hugh Hefner. Not. happening.

drhouse

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @andBegorrah: I am hoping this is far enough down in the comment threads so that I can successfully use this for years. Thank you for this.

@Hooplehead: I actually had a boyfriend of 3 years tell me (after I found out that he had an internet dating profile) that he had only done it to make sure he couldn't do any better. Um, asshole? You couldn't. Enjoy. I really do hear, though, that bitters is an important agreement in a number of alcoholic beverages.

Megan Carpentier

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @LadyNo: Dear god. That's horrible. I'm glad you have found the right one now! (I never did).

I had no idea this was so common. The thing is...one cannot predict it a priori. Sucks.

frumious

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @nodoubt9203 (Stalk Me I'm Icelandic): hahaha, no doubt

PopCultureSavant

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @Lady Skittlehattington's Publicist: Can I join in the dance, a la Romy and Michelle?

Le Kangourou de Kataroo

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @LadyNo: WHOA.

stacyinbean

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @LadyNo: Are you still friends?

Lady Skittlehattington

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @ceejeemcbeegee (just debatin' not hatin'): Oh, I see "the Wandering Eye" is a last minute addition.

ceejeemcbeegee

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> I am a little cranky at the moment re: the wandering eye. You can "keep your options open" until you die, boys, but for most of you there is not a supermodel just waiting to fall into your lap. Sometimes the girl you're with really is the best you can do. And in some cases, she is better than you deserve!

And no, I'm not bitter. Thanks for asking.

@frumious: Word.

Hooplehead

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @Le Kangourou de Kataroo (Bjork did it).: Seriously.
My go-to response to dudes in bars is a super-chipper, slightly-too-loud, coked-up-cheerleader-esque "Let's make a baby!" Am still waiting for a guy cool enough to find it funny and not run away horrified. But when that's the intended effect, it's fucking priceless.

andBegorrah

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @frumious: 6 years ago I left my then-fiance because my best guy friend confessed his love to me, told me he wanted to be with me forever, he could make me happy, blah, blah fucking blah. So I dumped my fiance and plan to move 6 hours away to be with the guy. One week before I move I get a letter that says "I don't feel the same spark you do." What. The. Fuck. So I go ahead and move, since, you know, I've burned all my bridges dumping the fiance, right? As soon as I started dating my now-husband, my friend suddenly started feeling amorous again. So fucked up, and he wonders now why he's 32 and single.

LadyNo Fondles Sweaters

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @Le Kangourou de Kataroo (Bjork did it).: I guess we'll have to slow dance with ourselves.

@AlmostZooey: I think we've agreed in the past that you have been involved with some crazies and major violators of these sins. Come, you can slow dance with me. I think that's "Time After Time" coming on...

Lady Skittlehattington

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> It's a bitter chocolate day, and this list worked itself in brilliantly.

madbain

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> I know the entitlement one is not-so-loosely based on a real experience, but I kinda feel bad about it. Becuase, while I have pity fucked people I would never, ever date, I would fucking clock a guy if he decided to tell me or other people that he'd pity fucked me and wouldn't actually date me.

I think what I'm trying to say is, some of these things are practiced by members of both sexes.

rocknrollunicorn

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> um, to be fair, the wimmins commit these sins from time to time. I have been guilty of #2 (although to me this usually signifies that it's time for the relationship to end, and it almost always is) and I make the kind of to-do lists a la #5 all the time (but that's just because I think my extreme narcissism is hilarious).

cupcakesofdeath

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @dianersb: Maybe the great news-flash way of putting it is like this

- if you date men, men will seem a little nuts
- if you date women, women will seem a little nuts

Armed with this knowledge, we can now understand stand-up comedy on a deeper, more meaningful level.

briardahl

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> OK, most of the list seems right on, for a lot of guys. But girls have to be trained to be worse at math and science. It's just living up to, or down to, expectations.

(I'm a filet o' fish, so all this really has little bearing on me. Still interesting though.)

Admore

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @andBegorrah: HO.LY. MAN. Seriously? Seriously?!
...I don't even know what to do with that. Except to use it ironically on the next dude at a bar I think is cool enough to find it funny.

Le Kangourou de Kataroo

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> Oh, and my other entitlement story: You know what's a real turn-on? When you cry in front of my house, at age 22, because I refuse to "date"/have sex with you for the summer after you spent the entire, sniffling walk home shocked that I initially refused the offer and begged me to rethink.

AlmostZooey

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @It'stheRooo: The signs are there. We just like to pretend they're not.

myboxsmellslikebutterscotch

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> I sort of feel like I'm not so bad, as my greatest sins are usually just being a fairly innocuous (but rowdy) drunk and having a hard time keeping my apartment clean.

Go Like Hell Machine

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @frumious: Oh this irks me to the max!

Her_royal_Highness

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @frumious: OMG, I have soooo lived this; please make this the bonus sin.

BettyBoopster

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @whats_in_a_name: *shudder*

@Le Kangourou de Kataroo (Bjork did it).: I doubt that's where one local barfly got this jem, apparently thinking that his new haircut resembled mine (it didn't):
"Now, when I masturbate, it's like we're making love."

andBegorrah

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @Emily: In defense of my vanity, I've "dated" so many losers, it's not even funny. Damn you, low self esteem!

Emily

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @frumious: Yes, this is a serious and all too common problem.

flackette is frustrated

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> Re: Delusions of Grandeur

I just dated my first sinner of this type. A few weeks after I met him, I spied a list pinned up near his desk with a list of traits that he aspired to. One of them was to "be a healer." We saw or spoke to each other every day for two months, all the while he was totally googley over me, then he totally went off the radar. Wouldn't return phone calls or texts. When I finally caught up with him days later, he gave me the old 'I just want to be alone routine.' Heal this, you twat.

CharlemagneBucket

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @Moe: Still waiting for you to ease my fears about that first one....

Macloserboy

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> Write a sequel to The Prince? That is HILARIOUS.

Honestly, I haven't dated guys like this. Not because I am super great, but because I am fine going without attention and nookie for long periods of time.

I'd rather hang with my friends or myself than an asshole.

Archetype

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> Y'all need better mens. But alas, mine is taken!

Emily

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @frumious: Word. That's the most irritating one. These are the guys who use persistence to wear you down.

ceejeemcbeegee

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> Oh god, my entire dating career is flashing before my eyes. I really need to bring a flask to work for Jezebel-induced flashbacks.

nolongerinacubiclestillawhore

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @Moe: It was well worth waiting for.

searched.and.seized

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> Does "narcissism" fall under "Delusions of Grandeur"? Because if not, then Narcissism. That is the WORST.

hortense

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @AndSheWas: Ooooh, that happened! I only wish I had saved that e-mail, it was pages and pages long, and contained multiple quizzes and paragraphs analyzing times I had smiled at him. This was long before Jezebel though...

AlmostZooey

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @hatepaperdoll: I was lying, anyway: I don't even have a to do list.

braak

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @andBegorrah: If thats number 7 then the guy i saw this morning wearing socks, sandals and a suit must have been the anti-Christ.

whats_in_a_name

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @andBegorrah: Most likely. Or reading too much cosmo to get insight on real women.

@Lady Skittlehattington's Publicist: Total stranger. That I didn't actually makeout with. So we're par for the course on weekend action. Sigh.

Le Kangourou de Kataroo

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @frumious: Haha yeah this is writing checks you can't keep. I don't know why I didn't add it.

Moe

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @myboxsmellslikebutterscotch: No we can't. Until they wear signs, none of us are safe.

Rooo sez BISH PLZ

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @frumious: Oooh, I second that for SERIOUS. That's vile.

girlscoutcookie

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @Klassy: *a guy, not I guy. I proofread and everything!

LittleBlackFly

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> Is this for guys exclusively, or for girls as well????? Cause I know I have delusions of grandeur...

dianersb

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> did anyone notice the 'Tagged' at the bottom - 'Crap, A, Dude' it made me giggle.

stacyinbean

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @AlmostZooey: lol, are you just being uproariously hilarious, or did that actually happen?

AndSheWas

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @braak: Having a grand ambition is at the top of mine.

hatepaperdoll

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> Since we are all fucking dykes, can we at least claim peer pressure for the sins we committ?

badmutha

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> #1. One of my best friends told I guy she'd been seeing for 2 weeks (that would be for a total of 3 dates + a few group social activities) that she wasn't interested in him romantically. He completely flew off the handle and told her she had commitment issues. After 3 dates! Bullet. Dodged.

LittleBlackFly

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> I would like to add the sin of "Chase and Bail."

I have experienced multiple sinners of this type. They engage in an elaborate and prolonged attempt to win you into a monogamous/serious relationship, declaring you are "The One" and convincing you of their earnest intentions, and, upon returning their affection, they decide they actually didn't want you.

frumious

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @Le Kangourou de Kataroo (Bjork did it).: Well, that's more action than I've seen in weeks. Was it a stranger or someone you knew?

Lady Skittlehattington

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @Le Kangourou de Kataroo (Bjork did it).: Can we agree to blame "Grey's Anatomy" for that kind of shit? Please?

andBegorrah

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> Hey guys, I forgot to paste one. I just put it up.

Moe

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> i think we have different types, moe.

bananaballs

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @Lady Skittlehattington's Publicist: I had a guy come up to me the other night and say "I'm going to makeout with you in 5 seconds. On purpose." Props for the initiative, points off for no other effort.

Le Kangourou de Kataroo

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> Ugh, entitlement. You know what's awesome? After they tell all your friends that you're dating, and to "back off," if they secretly take Cosmo "Do you like him?" quizzes as if they were you, and then e-mail you the quizzes & answers to let you know how much you secretly love them and to stop hiding from your true feelings. Ah... creepy, creepy memories...

AlmostZooey

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> A post from Moe that I agree with?--why, I've been praying for this moment since I was 14!

Snaffles

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @JessicaLovejoy: Backstairsly: Also, tough. *sigh*

JessicaLovejoy: Wanton Trollop

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> At the moment I would settle for a guy who actually makes an effort to get with me, rather than assuming that I'll fall into his lap if he sits there long enough being pretty.

I'm bitter today.

Lady Skittlehattington

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @Macloserboy: Making a list of my grand ambitions is at the top of my to do list.

braak

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @Sugarless: Yeah, uh, me neither. And I've dated some assholes. Damn.

TruculentandUnreliable

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @CristinaS: #7: Socks with sandals. No, just no.

andBegorrah

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @Macloserboy: like my coach always used to tell me: there are three kinds of people in the world. those that are good at math, and those that aren't.

onthecornerofparkerandwoolf

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> Sadly, I'd accept a handful of these sins if the rest of the dude was kinda decent.

Le Kangourou de Kataroo

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> All true, but we can take solace in knowing that some dudes openly admit their douchebag-ness. [cajunboyinthecity.blogspot.com]

myboxsmellslikebutterscotch

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @CristinaS: Heh. You're right. And right after mentioning men are better at math too. Ouch.

Macloserboy

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> I've been working so hard on doing all the others, now there's more shit on the shit? Hedonism is a tought job, bitches.

JessicaLovejoy: Wanton Trollop

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> I don't know Jez...I haven't dated any guys who do douchy stuff like this. Seriously.

Also, I'm gonna pass on that leper/apartheid experience.

CreoleSugar

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> @CristinaS: Girls aren't good at math.

I.Can. Haz.Black.Editors?

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> teh gayz have an extra 427 sins aggregated to that list.

nodoubt9203 [אִיזָבֶל]

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> What am I not guilty of???

angryblackgurl

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> Err... I only see 6 sins here...

ceejeemcbeegee

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> ladies, can I not count, or is that only six?

CristinaS

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> In my experience, the "Bros before Hos" guys are ALWAYS the ones who don't get any "hos." Its easy to put your boys first if you never get teh sex.

PinkSoxHat

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> Hey baby, will you tell me that story about how you came in that girl's face that night while shouting our her best friend's name, just to fuck with her?

I'm begging, begging, begging you to tell me you made this up as simply the worst thing you could think of. Please.

I do commit the sin of Grandeur, but since I'm also lazy, I've never bothered to even write a list down.

Macloserboy

]]> <![CDATA[Jezebel Presents: <i>THE SEVEN DUDELY SINS</i>]]> OH SNAP. I endorse this.

TeenageGangDeb

]]>