<![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos" - Jezebel Comments]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos" - Jezebel Comments]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> About Drunken Stepfather...why don't we have HIS picture as the pic for this series...he's the WORST!
I heard a great quote about PMS..."Premenstral syndrome...the one time of the month when a women acts like men do the rest of the time."
Robert Heinlien...

Kataluna

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> Dude! Why does everyone think we're all lesbians? Some of us on here, sure. Lots? Probably. And yay for that.

But all the haters totally come around and see a bunch of independent-minded women and think we're lesbians. Which actually kinda makes me think: How'd the lesbians get such a good reputation? :)

zivah

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> The BEST and final deflation of Drunken Stepfather was Slutmachine's description from Vegas, along the lines of "young, fat, shy, bad hair, but OK face under bad hair." Objective, observant, and obliterating.

Tanith

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> @mariamariamaria:

Yeah, thanks!

Tanith

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> drunken stepfather is a fatass irl. the whole website is the defense mechanism of a hipster reject.

stefonga

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> @Tanith: Ms. Tanith - are you the same Tanith that comments on fourfour? If so, hiya! I like your fourfour comments.

mariamariamaria

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> Leave Michael K. alone. He is funny and I believe he finds naked women nauseating because he is gay. Or at least he makes jokes about girly bits being unattractive. And Christina is quite trashy. That cover should be a misdemeanor.

Also, drunkenstepfather is a site dedicated to exaggerated misogeny. That's the joke. He also insults himself constantly. The whole thing is tongue in cheek. Including his site here just shows that you dont get it.

I agree with you on the others. And I like this bit, but only to the point that it is relevant.

encnyc

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> Also --

This whole section "Missdemeanors" feature is lame.

It's very women's-college McCarthyism.

Usually the citations are beyond trivial. This simply degrades the impact of significant instances of sexism.
Diluting political discourse is a losing proposition.
I know you pride yourselves on being post-post-post-feminists or whatever, but it's still important to retain some reserves of meaning.

Plus, Missy Elliot wants her pun back.

BTW, you all rock.

Tanith

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> Christina. IS. nauseating. With or without fetus.

I wonder if spray tan adheres to c-section scars?

Can you get an episiotomy and a Brazilian at the same time?

Michael K is the perfect equal-opportunity blasphemer.

Tanith

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> Rian bans people who say anything other than "ew she is a fat cow". She banned me from it for saying someone wasn't fat... Liv Tyler, I think. She only lets idiots comment.

Jan74

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> Including his readers.

mariamariamaria

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> @sparklytoesfairydustbutt: MichaelK calls everyone whores and skanks, LOL!

mariamariamaria

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> sorry, Michael K.

sparklytoesfairydustbutt

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> What is up with Michael D from the D List lately?! His posts today have been especially misogynistic of late... he's been getting worse with calling young celeb women whores and skanks... I don't see his calling any young celeb MEN gross whores or skanks???

sparklytoesfairydustbutt

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> Please tell me Drunken Stepfather never gets laid...

Her Royal Empress Dr. Bufflekins III, Esq.

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> Michael K can do no wrong in my eyes. Loves him.

shiningstar

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> Like the others have said, MK's distaste for the Xtina cover wasn't pregnancy related -- it was hate for Xtina related. ^.~

descendfromgrace

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> MichaelK's nausea is strictly Christina related. He is always going on and on about how much he loves pregnant lady chi-chi's that you'd think he was straight. I adore MichaelK - he is the best celebrity gossip blogger. He always makes me laugh.

mariamariamaria

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> There is nothing wrong with your legs if you can walk on them!

Amen. Watching my Dad face the prospect of having a double amputation, worrying about cellulite seems pretty dumb.

ceejeemcbeegee

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> Anybody who calls them Blammos has never seen or touched em.

The Authority

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> @TruculentandUnreliable: Hey, want to take up a biohazard-laden collection of used tampons for the express purpose of making the drunk stepdickwad choke on them to death?!

Seeing that SOB suffer is SO a good enough reason for public service like that, yo.

SBJ

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> We just want Rian (who e-mailed us recently to ask us to stop writing about her, then turned around and apologized and said "never mind")

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAhAHAhAHAHAHAHA! What a stupid, fucking little shit. She wants y'all to stop writing about her writing about other people!?!?!?! For serious!?!?

This Friday just got glorious. I mean, I hear angels singing and shit.

Oh, Rian, you're so dumb.

SBJ

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> I can't quite figure out how I feel about Drunken Stepfather--he's pretty clearly a piece of performance art, as it were, but then he does sometimes say things I think are over the already-quite-far-out-there line. Plus, the fact that he's scared of Slut Machine makes me think of him as Jezebel's hopelessly dorky younger brother who just wants to get a rise out of us by saying stupid shit, so I keep reading his excerpts here and going "oh, has your voice changed yet? Back to your dungeonmaster's guide, sweetie."

Snaffles

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> "Blammos?!" Hahaha! Seriously, never heard that one before but it sounds like something a confused six year old would say. Which is probably about right, given the source,

lumenatrix

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> @Dr. Spaceman: How go the battles with the powerful bread lobby?

I really had to restrain myself from a ME WANT FOOD reference. I lost.

Devi

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> There should be a sic after 'period's' as well. Apostrophes do not mean the word is a plural now! And also, it makes him look even stupider.

TinyK

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> God I loved Kristen Bell's dress in that link!

Tiny-Moves

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> As a rather accomplished practitioner of the snark, I really want to put the smack down on Rian and her twisted site. But I can't help picturing a sad, lonely, self-hating pubescent girl at her computer obsessing over celebrity BMIs and her largely blank food log of the five calories she wishes she hadn't consumed. Poor thing needs someone to do an intervention for her.

PhillyLass

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> i really thought that christina wouldn't objectify herself for at least as long as her pregnancy lasted. as soon as i saw that cover, i cringed and realized that some people can't handle not sexualizing everything to a weird and creepy degree.
pregnancy is wonderful, but it was like she used it to go to a new and gross sexual fetish stage never before seen.

tmmkitten

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> Oh Michael K meant no harm. He loves pregnancy because of the massive tatters girls get. When Salma was pregnant, jeebus, he was all over her boobs, I almost thought he was straight for a minute! But as previously mentioned, Michael K has no love for Xtina. Too orange for his tastes.

brendahamLincoln

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> @Pancakelover:
exactly..

rantersparadise

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> BACK OFF MICHAEL K.

Love ya!

BeSarcastic

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> I thought the Christina shoot in MC was gorgeous, although I'm with y'all on her terrifying fake tan/makeup level. But the photos inside I considered hanging on my wall, until I realized how terminally weird that would be.

sheistolerable

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> Michael K can't do anything wrong even if he tried. Jezebel misunderstanding -- call off your dogs.

Pancakelover

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> I hope drunken stepfather gets hit by a freight train. what a douche.

rubesmanubes

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> T8r Tots was kind of hilarious....and Michael K from dlisted should automatically be forgiven because as someone said--the cover DID look gross, plus he's one of the few celeb bloggers who is actually awesome.

Gangee

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> I'm going to start calling mine "blammos."

gobblegirl

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> @TruculentandUnreliable: Ugh. Drunken Stepfather uses "funny" and "satirical" in the same way that GWB uses "patriotic": Simply as an excuse for being an aggressive assbag.

Miss Pelled

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> I too must put in my word in defense of Michael K. He never specifically said that the pregnancy looked ugly, only the photos. He often makes fun of her orange skin and overly made-up face, and girlfriend has both those things going on in that photo.

I hereby appeal Michael's conviction on insufficiency of the evidence.

vulcanized

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> Michael K is the only gay in my life, living where I do, and since we have such a personal relationship, I feel I must defend him: it was the mystictan and the 27 layers of makeup, not the pregnant. But even if it were, he hates on everyone, so it's ok.

myrtlebeachbum

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> Can I tie Drunken Stepfather up and force-feed him my dirty tampons?

I know he's just being "funny" and "satirical," but it is neither funny nor satirical.

TruculentandUnreliable

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> also- in addition to her website focused around celebrity weight fluctuations, the lady runs a website focused around "chick-lit". not the gum with the delicious candy coating, but those terrible books about shoes.

incurable paranoiac

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> So just how important is tooth retention to you?

Dr. Spaceman, Esq.

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> @ExtensionOfBob: i didn't even know people under the age of 12 called breasts "tater tots". wtf?

incurable paranoiac

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> @ineffable.me: But all of those model/singer/actress types think that it's sexy 'cause Demi did it. I think it's derivative b/c it seems like every Starlet has done the nudie pregnant picture, and stupid because they have no idea they are objectifying themselves (as you said so much better than I).

langtry

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> @rocknrollunicorn: I'm sure the good Mr. K was more grossed out by the fact that she was so orange than as to the baby bump. He's got a long standing hate of the Xtina, so I don't think it was a pregnancy dig.

StupidFace

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> @ineffable.me: It was also bad because it was a copy of a million other, better covers. If you're going to rip something off, at least do it well.

I bet Rian is just glad of the extra hits her shitty, shitty site gets. Blech.

MegSpencer

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> pithy! you can see dodai's celebrity rag roots.

J.D.Regent

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> totes having gross anatomy flashbacks right now. ew.

much rather be having period sex.

inchworm

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> Michael K, oh no! I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt. I bet it wasn't a shot at pregnancy.

And Jane Krakowski is fucking hot.

rocknrollunicorn

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> oh and i thought the xtina cover was kinda gross, but mostly because i think the whole "i'm naked and pregnant" thing is kinda icky. pregnant women can be and often are beautiful, but it still just kinda icks me out when celebrities think i'm interested in seeing their naked pregnant bodies. like not even in pregnancy can some women avoid objectifying themselves.

joyjoyjoy

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> @langtry: I thought it was gross because it sexualized her in a really trashy, gross way. I'm not saying that pregnant woman can't be sexual, but the way she looked in that cover was just ew ew ew. I would probably object to it if she wasnt pregnant too.

ineffable.me

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> Rian WOULD ask y'all to quit writing about her. Because she is A) A spineless fucking pussy-ass and B) too stupid and amateurish to know that any publicity is good publicity.

BiscuitDoughJones

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> Blammos? That's a new one for me.

AbbyNormal

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> @ineffable.me: I found it derivative and stupid, not gross really. It's like those super skinny women who get pregnant and get a plaster cast made of their baby bump and nail it up on their living room wall. It's as if they are announcing to the world ...

"Tee Hee! Can you believe I was actually fat once? Oh, how I suffered!"

langtry

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> t8tr tots... i actually think that's kinda funny. sorry.

joyjoyjoy

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> @knitsandwich: Agreed. Talking about the "food?" Ok. Some silly product for kids? Fine. But dude. Who over the age of 12 calls breasts tater tots?

Also, I feel like Rian needs a hug and some healthy girl time over a pint of ice cream.

ExtensionOfBob

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> Jane will personally punish the last dude by tying him down and performing "Muffin Top" for 24 hours straight.

JessicaLovejoy is voting for Kodos

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> Pregnant or not Aguilera grosses me out with that disgusting mask she always wears. I read she even wore that hooker makeup into the delivery room.

SuzieCreamcheese

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> I've always wanted to be a feminist lesbian ya'll. Cuz if periods ain't natural, neither is sucking cock.

AnnoyingFemaleLeadVoiceover

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> But it could also be that i h8 Avril. (hehe)

Solangel

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> P.S. The commenters on The Skinny Website are complete idiots.

Archetype

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> @solangel: I kinda thought it was funny too....but only 'cause I hate Avril.

rose0red

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> T8tr Tots? 4 Reels? I h8chu.

RodetheTrolleywithStanwyck

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> I'm totally a six yr old cuz T8r Tots made me laugh.

Solangel

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> Okay, T8r Tots on its own is pretty funny for some reason. But not as a synonym for breasts.

KnitSandwich

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> There is nothing wrong with your legs if you can walk on them!

Brilliant. A little shot of perspective can go a long way.

I'm with Micheal K, though. Aguilera's pretty gross. Sorry!

Archetype

]]> <![CDATA[Cellulite-Spotting, Period Sex & "Sizeable Blammos"]]> Christina Aguilera's cover was gross though. But not because she was pregnant, I just think Marie Claire likes having shitty covers.

ineffable.me

]]>