The Second Period No One Tells You About - Jezebel Comments

The Second Period No One Tells You About

aspiringexpatriate — Wed, 21 Nov 2007 13:59:42 EST

bowel movements once a week?

you people are insane. also- i blame the whiskey induced diarrhea.

aspiringexpatriate

The Second Period No One Tells You About

blsn48 — Wed, 21 Nov 2007 13:53:52 EST

cute and useful story thanks

blsn48

The Second Period No One Tells You About

Trackback — Mon, 16 Jul 2007 12:16:17 EDT

We nearly skipped over Self’s “Sitting On a Secret,” July, once we determined it was about hemorrhoids. A few days ago, we read this, which was more than enough information on the topic. Also, we’re squeamish.

Trackback

The Second Period No One Tells You About

SweatsuitHaven — Tue, 03 Jul 2007 21:06:47 EDT

@brechtgirl: Hee!

@talaton: No. Though didn't someone change their name to Obi-Wan for some radio contest when Episode 1 came out?

@mccauller: I'm too old to have been named Buffy. Thank ever-lovin God.

SweatsuitHaven

The Second Period No One Tells You About

TheFormerJuneBronson — Fri, 29 Jun 2007 14:46:02 EDT

@BonnieLass: I'm afraid I cannot make you feel better about this. When I was a nurse, I had a couple of patients with pessaries. They were in their nineties, and had been nuns all their lives. Never had sex. Definitely no children. It's more of a connective tissue problem at the root. Anyone can get it. It's just more likely to happen if you've had children.

TheFormerJuneBronson

The Second Period No One Tells You About

culocho — Fri, 29 Jun 2007 08:58:41 EDT

Best post ever. Thanks.

culocho

The Second Period No One Tells You About

BonnieLass — Fri, 29 Jun 2007 00:35:37 EDT

@mmh: Damnit. I just googled that. I did not know that could happen.

I have sooo many questions, and yet, I really don't want any of them answered. Okay, maybe just one: That's just for women who have kids, right? Right? Lie to me if you have to ...

BonnieLass

The Second Period No One Tells You About

Madame_Ovary — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 23:09:51 EDT

Moe T, seriously funny, and amusingly serious. But, dear, I hope you would be earning enough to eat something more healthy? Fresh fruit and veg everyday will help keep Dr. Wang away, charming as he may be. Elimination once a day is good for the system; not doing so indicates a lack of many things, food being one of them.

Madame_Ovary

The Second Period No One Tells You About

mmh — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 22:41:53 EDT

Ooo, can you do one next on prolapsed uterus? I think that's something we can all agree to look forward to.

I do agree with everyone else that this is the funniest thing I've read in I don't know how long.

mmh

The Second Period No One Tells You About

newportjoey — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 22:20:30 EDT

I guess pointing out that Shit haoppens would be redundent?//Ok, Ok, OK...... Karma Cameleone

newportjoey

The Second Period No One Tells You About

TheFormerJuneBronson — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 19:26:27 EDT

Yeah, I found out the hard way that even with a C-section, they happen. Also fun: pilonidal and Bartholin's cysts. I had the surgery for the pilonidal when I was fifteen, and then bumped into the surgeon again when I was in nursing school. He was a complete jerk, and although I knew he didn't remember me, I could never interact with him without thinking about how he operated on my butt.

Bartholin's are horrible. Worse than childbirth. I thought I had cancer. I'm lucky my now-husband doesn't skeeve easily.

TheFormerJuneBronson

The Second Period No One Tells You About

caffeine72 — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 18:12:29 EDT

I'm very familiar with the 'rrhoids, thanks to having had IBS since childhood. Major fiber intake helps, but I still get the cracking form on occasion. Haven't had a prolapsed one since that horrible time about 10 years ago when I finally wound up at the doctor (driving a stick shift while sitting on only one cheek the whole way) and got put into the stirrups. I'll take a lifetime of pelvics over that any day.

Got good prescription foam with a hilarious syringe-thingie, though.

caffeine72

The Second Period No One Tells You About

Flashman — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 17:52:49 EDT

Moe Tkacik, you're a good writer.

Flashman

The Second Period No One Tells You About

Shambala — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 16:42:05 EDT

That mention of not pooping for several days was kind of a red flag. Eat your fiber, everyone!

Shambala

The Second Period No One Tells You About

GracyRules — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 16:34:09 EDT

Throw in raging alcoholism and the fun with the 'roids REALLY begins....

GracyRules

The Second Period No One Tells You About

washionfore — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 15:56:49 EDT

what about when 'roids get "popped back in" by your doctor ... not that I know anything about that.

washionfore

The Second Period No One Tells You About

acidspit — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 15:53:28 EDT

Huh. It must be some sort of "face the 'roids" week. There was a two page article on hemmoroids in this week's Self magazine...

acidspit

The Second Period No One Tells You About

fashionablycontrived — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 15:50:40 EDT

You really are supposed to poop at least once a day. Not only hemorrhoids can develop but worse problems with your colon. Sorry to be gross but you might want to google the problem.

fashionablycontrived

The Second Period No One Tells You About

hellodarling! — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 15:47:25 EDT

@SweatsuitHaven: Buffy?

hellodarling!

The Second Period No One Tells You About

Dingaling — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 15:45:55 EDT

Dr. Wang is awesome.

Dingaling

The Second Period No One Tells You About

chunkstyle — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 15:33:57 EDT

As a note...Try to remember what you've eaten before the appearance of the red too. I had eaten beet salad and was very embarrassed that I made a trip to the Dr. to find out that, well, it was the beets. The more you know indeed.
This is seriously helpful info though :)

chunkstyle

The Second Period No One Tells You About

X on the MTA — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 15:31:44 EDT

This is pretty much one of the funniest things I have read in a long time. You don't have to be old to be male with hemorrhoids, it also happens to be a common problem amongst drunks. Between the havoc that a steady diet of Marlboros and Negra Modelo can wreck on your GI tract and the long long hours spent sitting on a hard wooden stool a solid stool may be a distant memory, but the inflamed hemorrhoids are not. I wouldn't be surprised if the kind of cool tattooed kids that ride fixed gear bikes, drink too much cheap beer, and have weekend heroin habits are also victims of this pain in the ass.

X on the MTA

The Second Period No One Tells You About

pink-india-ink — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 15:20:07 EDT

My mother, bless her, once pleasantly explained to me that a hemorrhoid is "when the bottom part of your low intestine falls out of your butt". Falls out! Like, hey, sometimes your innards go flying out the back end-- whatever, it's just gravity!

Also-- is Jezebel doing poop stories now? Can I submit my anecdote about a college boyfriend who had a vestigial anus?

pink-india-ink

The Second Period No One Tells You About

brechtgirl — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 15:19:14 EDT

The more you know.

brechtgirl

The Second Period No One Tells You About

Talaton — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 14:53:46 EDT

@SweatsuitHaven: Obi-Wan?

Talaton

The Second Period No One Tells You About

ConstanceReader — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 14:42:29 EDT

Actually, I'm grateful for the article. I have a few GI disorders that require such self-examinations during bathroom sojourns (and a lot of meds). In my case, the disorders I have are of the type in which bright red can equal internal bleeding, so I do have to stay aware in case a trip to the doctor is called for. Fortunately it's just rrhoid rage.

It's the "ick" factor of the subject that makes it difficult for patients to discuss these things with their doctors. And that also makes it difficult for doctors to say "it's common, treatable and no big deal" or, more importantly, "Hmmm, let's do a scope and make sure everything's ok." It's why it took me so long to finally be completely forthright with my doctor, and suffered needlessly for years because I wasn't providing the information he needed to prescribe appropriate treatment.

IBS, Crohn's and colitis do occur in women in greater numbers than men. So kudos to Moe for taking that brave first step!

ConstanceReader

The Second Period No One Tells You About

SweatsuitHaven — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 14:28:50 EDT

I happen to share my first name with a relatively popular sci-fiction character and have heard every lame joke and inappropriate comment imaginable. Because of this I keep all name-related jokes/puns to myself; surely that wasn't the 1st time Dr. Wang was subjected to that one.

But I totally laughed.

SweatsuitHaven

The Second Period No One Tells You About

BottledCynicism — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 14:27:11 EDT

I joked on the phone that this will be the first wang I've ever had in my butt. Silence.

I laughed so hard at this. Ah, thank you.

This was great and I can personally relate. Combination of not enough fiber and fear of pooping in public restrooms brought down the wrath of the hemmy a couple years back. When I waddled through Walgreens to get my PrepH, I picked up a Happy 40th birthday card so the clerk would think it was a joke gift. Now I tell that story to everyone because hemorrhoids are hilarious.

BottledCynicism

The Second Period No One Tells You About

ohpasco — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 14:19:09 EDT

if dr wang was on the bachelor, he'd be bigger than bob guiney.

ohpasco

The Second Period No One Tells You About

clevecinema — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 14:09:09 EDT

bc, huh?

and so the great abortion v. hemorrhoid debates begin...

clevecinema

The Second Period No One Tells You About

a lady — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 14:05:33 EDT

copy. edit.

please?

a lady

The Second Period No One Tells You About

stacyinbean — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 14:00:44 EDT

fuck. now i have to quit the pill and get my butt waxed?

stacyinbean

The Second Period No One Tells You About

nolongerinacubiclestillawhore — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 13:59:21 EDT

I can see the PSA's already.

nolongerinacubiclestillawhore

The Second Period No One Tells You About

hellodarling! — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 13:52:39 EDT

Also, that evil-looking flame graphic thing is hands down the best part of this post!

hellodarling!

The Second Period No One Tells You About

hellodarling! — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 13:51:56 EDT

Well. There goes lunch!

hellodarling!

The Second Period No One Tells You About

BobbyJoeBob — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 13:44:34 EDT

waxing the backdoor has been proven to prevent hemorrhoids. seriously.

BobbyJoeBob

The Second Period No One Tells You About

sheistolerable — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 13:42:26 EDT

BC gives you hemorrhoids? Awesome . . .

sheistolerable