What British People Say vs. What They Really Mean

AWFUL NEWS: Apparently British people aren’t really the congenial ladies and sirs we all expect them to be. Great, next thing you know we’ll be hearing about how tea and crumpets aren’t a real thing and potato waffles are a lie. I can’t take it.

A Cup of Joe has a translation chart, and it’s not pretty, but it is hilarious. Here’s a taste:

This reminds me of the movie European Vacation when the Griswalds basically run over a British person and the British person apologizes to them. Now I’m thinking the British person was probably really thinking, “Get cancer, Yankee scumnuts.” Which, would be the appropriate reaction when dealing with Clark Griswald in pretty much any situation.