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According to this 1942 ad for Lux Soap, not only are your undergarments sentient — they're talking about you behind your back. At least now we know how the tabloids get so many scoops about what's going on in Jennifer Aniston's bedroom. More »
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This wreath-shaped monstrosity is perfect for the frustrated 1960's housewife who wishes to express her disdain for her inlaws through her food. It's just like Like Water For Chocolate, but with more processed lunch meat. More »
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Retro advertising was even more misogynistic than Mad Men makes it seem according to these 48 ads. Today's Axe commercials are gross, but at least they don't blatantly declare women are only good for cooking, cleaning, and occasionally killing. More »
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Vintage Ads dug up this gem from 1953, back when "it's less than 15 cents per serving!" and "it's super easy to slice up!" were food selling points. Serve it to someone toothless that you love this holiday season. More »
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That's the message behind this 1954 ad for Trushay hand softener. Annie's hands are so bad, the dog is giving her side-eye. More »
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You know, just in case you forgot. Pink is for girls, silly! Also for girls? Showering in a barrel, apparently. [VintageAds] More »
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What do you get when you cross Betty Draper with Lady Gaga? Whatever it is that Hoover Mom over here is wearing, apparently. [VintageAds] More »
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Vintage Ads is currently running a "creepy kids in ads" contest, and, well, I'm going to have to vote for Creepy Baby-Dye-The-Cat-Blood-Red over here. Click to enlarge. [VintageAds] More »
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This German hosiery ad from 1959 tries to convince us of two things: one, that wearing these nylons will literally turn you in to a man magnet, and two, that wearing them may also turn you into a giant. [VintageAds] More »
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"All you ladies might as well be warned right now: you're going to be the target for admiring eyes—and perhaps a few whistles too—in your slick new Chevrolet." Click to enlarge. [VintageAds] More »
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Depression, deshmession: the women of 1936 had other problems. Like...what if you're not beautiful? And need the laxative to attain beauty? Are you allowed to take it, too? Hard times. More »
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As we've seen in the past, vaginal odor as marriage destroyer is a pretty big theme in vintage advertising. This Norforms ad from 1953 fits right in. [VintageAds] More »
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Girls, your Mystery Date has arrived. And if you're lucky, maybe he'll call you later, on your Dream Phone. Isn't he just the most, to say the least? [Vintage Ads] More »
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I don't know which is more amusing: the intense sweatpants love in this retro Gap "action wear" commercial, or the fact that every article of clothing seen in said commercial can probably currently be purchased at American Apparel. More »
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Perhaps the scariest thing about this implement (worn to bed for beautification purposes) is that the ad refers to it as "a new facial harness." Time to retire the old model, right?! More »
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You know what? After seeing this vintage ad, I'm not really sure that I want to know what "makin' friends, Winnebago style," really entails. [VintageAds] More »
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I'm not even going to lie, crew: this vintage ad made me laugh really hard. [VintageAds] More »
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For what would Mother ever need a vacation from? Cleaning? Cooking? Sewing? Ironing? Raising the kids? Planning a vacation strictly for Father's benefit? She LOVES those things! Imagine. A vacation for Mother. Now that's just crazy talk. [VintageAds] More »
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If you thought weddings were about making a commitment to the person you love, prepare to be schooled by this vintage ad. Apparently they're all about procuring cheap cotton bed linens. More »
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I'm pretty sure that the woman in this vintage ad isn't actually yelling Lane Bryant's heinous old copy. What do you think she's really saying? [Vintage Ads] More »
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Want a modernized kitchen? A dish rack is a good place to start, I suppose, but kicking your cartoon caveman husband to the curb might actually be a better option. Click to enlarge. [Vintage Ads] More »
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Vintage Ads is currently running a sexist ads contest, and they've narrowed it down to five insanely sexist finalists. This one is my favorite (and by "favorite," I mean "one I'm most horrified by"); which one is yours? [VintageAds] More »
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Isn't this just so true, ladies? I know that when I reach for the Midol, it's because I want to be the girl my boyfriend likes to be around, and not because I'm bleeding and it hurts. [VintageAds] More »
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So why not deal with the stress of women's lib by popping a few Vivarin now and then, eh? Surely Jessie Spano would have something to say about this. [Vintage Ads] More »
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Watching this ad for Twist 'n Turn Barbie is a surreal experience (due mostly to the creepy voice-over) - until Marcia Brady shows up, skipping around with her very own doll. Keen! [Vintage Ads] More »
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In this vintage Jordache commercial, a teenage girl claims she hates her beautiful mother until she realizes that she'll eventually grow up to look just like her. She should probably get new friends, though. What a bunch of jerks! [VintageAds] More »
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Here's a good lesson to remember: if you don't handle your constipation right away by eating fiber-filled cereal, you will turn into a deranged, crap-filled Stephen King character of sorts who terrifies America through emotional mask expression. [Vintage Ads] More »
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How to get your kids to eat their veggies, mid-century style? Terrify them into submission with a sinister behemoth who's obviously ready to snap. Any. Second. [Copyranter] More »
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Oh, man. Dinner is going to be a hoot when Mom figures out that her family really meant "Please Satan," and not "make us some ham sandwiches, Ma." Click to enlarge. [VintageAds] More »
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Previously, Vintage Ads shared the worst retro recipe ever. Now they've unveiled the best: Bacon. Pancakes. We don't know how this dish fell out of favor, but it'll be making a comeback in our kitchens tomorrow morning. [VintageAds via Copyranter] More »
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A wonder lotion that anti-ages, clears, refreshes, soothes, removes skin irritations, shrinks pores and erases blackheads, all for $3? LOL, indeed. [Vintage_Ads] More »
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We use this excuse all the time to get out of social obligations! Of course, when we say it, it's not code for "strung out on housework," something sexual involving a broomstick, or "I'm an indentured servant." Well, usually. [Vintage_Ads] More »
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It might be a sharp contrast to the weight-related ads we see in women's magazines today, but this vintage ad proves that marketers will always find a way to shame women into taking supplements to "fix" their bodies. [VintageAds] More »
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Playing on hygiene fears in order to sell beauty products is nothing new, but I'm pretty sure this is the first ad—vintage or otherwise—I've ever seen featuring a woman complaining about her smelly hand problem. [VintageAds More »
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Talk about surrendering to a higher power: Mrs. Margaret Anderson, "the noble woman who is hated by the whiskey trust", has discovered a secret remedy for drunkenness, "which anyone can give secretly." We suspect the time-honored snake-in-bottle ruse. [Vintage_Ads] More »
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Need a new pair of glasses? Perhaps this vintage ad, for the optical department at Sears, will give you some ideas. Or...maybe not, as one YouTube commenter notes: "They're all the same! They're all the same!!!" [VintageAds] More »
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This 1955 ad for Star-Kist tuna has been crowned "most disgusting" in a Vintage Ads contest. Mom's ingredients for "Monterey Soufflé Salad": lemon Jello, mayo, tuna, green olives, and a deep hatred for her children. [Vintage Ads via Copyranter] More »
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This vintage ad claims it will teach you how to "fascinate and control everybody" - especially men - for the low, low price of 10 cents. But how does one do this? By slipping something in his drink, obviously. [Copyranter] More »
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"So this is the word of modern dietary science—eat candy sensibly—eat it as a food—if you do this you will get the greatest possible enjoyment and benefit from it." Done and done! Thanks, Modern Dietary Science! [VintageAds] More »
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According to the worst lifeguards ever, seen here in this vintage Listerine ad, if you have bad breath, you deserve to be swept into the ocean. Click to enlarge. [Vintage Ads] More »
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