http://cache.jezebel.com/assets/base/img/thumbs140x140/jezebel.com.png http://jezebel.com/tag/tv http://jezebel.com/tag/tv

In this week's TV roundup, Downton's staff might be headed towards a big change, relationships are made and broken inside Ikea on 30 Rock, Die Antwoord freaks out David Letterman, and Portlandia gets into Battlestar. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5884170&view=rss&microfeed=true

Bravo has given the greenlight to a new show, Love Broker, in which two best friends — one a real estate agent, and one a matchmaker — set up male clients in New York City. It's not exactly "sign here and get an apartment and a girlfriend," but every now and then, it does happen: "Sometimes, after selling an apartment, we sign [the buyer] up to find their [life] partners," Love Broker's Jennifer Zucher says. The truth is, I suspect a lot of people wouldn't mind outsourcing this kind of stuff: Way way back in the day, we had limited choices in terms of living spaces — this cave or that one — and either you just hooked up with whomever wasn't your brother, or the elders told you where to live and who to hang with. Now we're so busy and the world is so big it's hard to figure all this shit out. Plus, real estate can be a major factor in love lives: Some people won't date other people based on their neighborhood/borough/commute time. And if Pretty In Pink taught us anything, it's that your feelings about someone can change when you see what kind of house they live in. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5884088&view=rss&microfeed=true

It's sort of universally understood that The Situation is a slimeball borderline molester and that Paul D. is barely any better with his seemingly pathological need to pick have sex with a different woman every night only to have her driven away by a cab before his bed grows cold or his dick gets dry. So given his roommates, I guess that by comparison, Vinny seems like a halfway decent guy. But is he? In this clip, he's not only objectifying the woman he has sex with, but he insults her on top of it, referring to her as "a 5 or a 6" on the 1 - 10 scale. I mean, naturally, these girls are partially responsible for being on the show at all for signing releases—particularly because, this being the fifth season, they've witnessed how hookups are portrayed—but seeing as how they are always picked up at clubs, I question how sober they are when they actually sign the release forms. I would think that the tactics used to get those girls' signatures are far more aggressive and unethical than those used by the douche bags that are trying to get laid. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5884106&view=rss&microfeed=true

Pete and Olivia on Fringe. Jack and Liz on 30 Rock. Booth and Bones on Bones. Beckett and Castle, Scully and Mulder, Buffy and Angel, Xena and Gabrielle. To kiss or not to kiss, that is the question. Sometimes a TV series stirs not only the imagination, but the heart… and the loins. The new issue of Entertainment Weekly features a cover story about the sexy love triangle on The Vampire Diaries, as well as a supplemental essay, "Just Do It," in which Jeff Jensen discusses the culture of "shippers," fans who are deeply invested in the romantic relationship between fictional characters. Jensen seems to think that all shippers really want is to see their favorite couples be together. But is this true? Do we actually want our One True Pairings to be together? Or is the longing the best part? More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5884026&view=rss&microfeed=true

Next Wednesday on The Soup, RuPaul and some queens will star in a skit called "Dragton Abbey." It looks like Ru is Carson. We're hoping Joel McHale is the Dowager Countess. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5883764&view=rss&microfeed=true

On last night's premiere of the seventh season of Real Housewives of Orange County, we got to see that Alexis Bellino—who believes that Jesus sanctions silicone implants but not homosexuality (because that's unnatural)—got herself another job. Adding to her responsibilities of her dress line, Alexis Couture, Alexis took on a once-a-week correspondence gig for the Fox 5 morning show in San Diego, for a series of segments about butts. Seriously. Having previously been very adamant about her belief that women belong in the home and not in the White House, it's weird to hear Alexis talking about how no glass ceiling will hold her back from her career goals, like her dream of being the Katie Couric of National Booty Awareness Month. Hopefully her newfound freedom won't turn her into one of those problematic "liberal" women. Whatever the case, it's good to see her evolving, at least in her own way, from the person who previously thought picking out her own outfit was the ultimate act of empowerment: More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5883509&view=rss&microfeed=true

Zooey Deschanel will be hosting SNL this Saturday. I bet she and Studio 8H will have a magical night of swimming in fountains, wearing animal masks in public and singing Nancy Sinatra songs at karaoke before she takes off, leaving the studio heartbroken, but ultimately changed for the better. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5883469&view=rss&microfeed=true

Now that I have a kid, I make it a point to not judge other parents, because it's really just the hardest job in the world. So, purely in my desire to understand the situation, I'd like to know where Leah finds the time to do all these things—like get drunk and have an affair—when she has infant twins at home, one of whom is a special needs child. It's not like I'd use her scheduling tips to go out and cheat on my own husband, but it'd be nice if I could find about 20 minutes in the day to put on a fraction of the amount of eyeliner she wears. I mean, I just have this one run-of-the mill baby and she monopolizes my life to the point that I've been too tired to bother changing the milk-stained bra I've been wearing for three days. And time aside, where does this girl get the energy that's required of someone who is so horny that she can't wait one week until her honeymoon and simply must have sex with the first guy who will pay attention to her? More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5883417&view=rss&microfeed=true

More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5883103&view=rss&microfeed=true

Last night on RuPaul's Drag Race, the queens were split into teams of four and thrown into the WTF — kind of like the WWF, but with "Wrestling's Trashiest Fighters." Team Chad won, mostly because Chad Michaels and Madame LaQueer camped it up, playing the villain characters with gusto and looking like they were Cry-Baby and Hatchet Face's fellow Drapes from Turkey Point. There was a certain sense of justice in the victory, since Madame LaQueer was the last kid chosen to be on any team. Don't you love it when the underdog pulls through? More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5883065&view=rss&microfeed=true

Everyone knows that it takes a certain amount of makeup to get that pretty no-makeup look. But what should you use? Where should you put it? We asked RuPaul's Drag Race finalist Manila Luzon to demonstrate a 'natural' look for us. Remember, coral lips are natural, because coral exists in nature. And here's a quotable for you: "Don't pump! It just dries out your tube." More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5882686&view=rss&microfeed=true

Saturday on SNL, Lana Del Rey returned to the show — in the form of Kristen Wiig (in a wig). As Del Rey, Wiig defended those who blasted the performance three weeks ago, saying: "Based on the public's response, I must have instead clubbed a baby seal while singing the Taliban national anthem." Lana Del Wig also pointed out that Sting, Cher, Elton John, Bob Dylan have all changed their names, and it's not like only the best of the best play SNL, since past musical guests include Bubba Sparxx, the Baha Men, and Shaggy. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5882643&view=rss&microfeed=true

All the good stuff happens to Lady Mary. All the boys like her, all the cousins want to marry her, all the Turkish diplomats die fucking her, all the attention is always on her, everyone is betting their money on her, Carson likes her. Mary, Mary, Mary! Even all the good heartbreak happens to Mary, with her love triangle with two rich men and the whole Florence Nightingale syndrome she has going on with her crippled war hero. So when a Canadian officer claiming to be the Crawleys' cousin Patrick—who supposedly died on the Titanic—came to Downton after an explosion burned his face to Freddy Krueger-makeup proportions, thus making him unrecognizable, Lady Edith was the obvious target for his con. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5882645&view=rss&microfeed=true

Pulled into the arena by gladiators, clad in the gleaming gold headdress of an ancient Egyptian-Greco-Roman empress, 53-year-old Madonna strutted, kicked, squat-thrusted and yogilates-cized her way through an epic halftime performance at the Super Bowl last night. Her Madgesty was mostly covered up — from ankle to knee, knuckle to elbow — and she wasn't always singing live (anyone who's seen her on tour knows that's par for the course) — but she was impressively kinetic, dominating the stage even as the dancers in togas morphed into dancers in Adidas track suits. The over-produced spectacle managed to blend lyres, hieroglyphs, cheerleaders, Vogue, voguing, a marching band and a choir. After a guest appearance by LMFAO (wearing gaudy animal print and Chuck Taylors rigged to look like gladiator sandals), Madonna was joined by Nicki Minaj and MIA, and later, Cee-Lo. One could take issue with the fact that the people of color were side-accessories to the white woman in the middle, but then again, perhaps that was just a mirror of football itself, in which most of the players are black but about 95% of quarterbacks are white. Still, if the whole point was to present a ridiculous, elaborate, eye-popping entertainment experience for football fans — and lure in curious non-football-watching folks (like yours truly), then MDNA's endeavor was a success. World peace. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5882576&view=rss&microfeed=true

In this week's television roundup, Joan Rivers is smoking that sticky icky, OK Go brings their charms to Sesame Street and Glee sends Michael Jackson spinning in his grave. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5882113&view=rss&microfeed=true

Last night, in some reality TV crossover weirdness, MTV's Jersey Shore stars Snooki and JWoww appeared on Bravo's Watch What Happens Live, where they really opened up to host Andy Cohen, mostly about the goings-on of their vaginas. We learned that Snooki got a UTI from anal sex, that "everyone" from the Jersey Shore cast has had sex in a tanning bed at some point, that both Snooki and JWoww have had sex on the beach but didn't like it because they got sand in their vadges, and that they don't like Paris Hilton because she was nasty to their cast mate Vinny. (They didn't elaborate on whether Hilton was more irritating than sand in the vagina.) Despite all this honesty, JWoww insists that the only "work" she's had done was a boob job. (Which somehow screwed up her face?) More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5882000&view=rss&microfeed=true

First it was hoarders, then it was extreme couponers, now TLC is turning its attention on people who obsessively fill their homes with tons of things called My Crazy Obsession. Based on the network's one-off special My Obsession Collection that aired last summer, the new show—premiering in March—will feature collectors of all walks, like one couple who owns over 5,000 Cabbage Patch Kids and a woman who has turned everything in her life (including her dog) pink. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5881776&view=rss&microfeed=true

Even if it were not an election year, the Shonda Rhimes show Scandal — about a female Washington DC crisis management expert — would pique our interest. But throw in all the recent kerfluffles concerning the sex lives of Herman Cain and Newt Gingrich, as well as the fact that the main character is inspired by real-life catastrophe guru Judy Smith (a former George W. Bush administration aide), and we're in. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5881588&view=rss&microfeed=true

Last night, TLC debuted Sorority Girls, a British show about a group of young American women who love the Greek system so much that they head across the pond to open Sigma Gamma, the UK's first sorority. Britain has been on a roll when it comes to reality TV lately (The Virgin Diaries, Desperate Scousewives, My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding) and Sorority Girls definitely follows in the tradition of proving that the United Kingdom is not entirely made up of Colin Firths and the cast of Downton Abbey. It's true, being trashy is no longer exclusively American. Let's throw all of our off-brand velour sweatsuits into the Boston Harbor because this is absolute bullshit. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5881339&view=rss&microfeed=true

The thing about Joan & Melissa is that it's obviously a scripted "reality" show, but since Joan Rivers is doing the writing, it's actually really funny. So on last night's episode when Joan smoked weed in a car parked in a cul-de-sac, it didn't really matter if the whole thing was most likely staged (and that Melissa's acting skills are horrendous) — it still worked. The premise was that Joan was really stressed out from dealing with the parents of Melissa's boyfriend, who were visiting from out of town. So she went and got a medical marijuana prescription to deal with anxiety. She subsequently went bong-shopping and visited a head shop where she purchased a strain of pot called "Louis XIII." She and a friend smoked weed out of pipe with a pig on it; hilarity (and the munchies) ensued. By the end of the episode, she jumped into a hot tub with her clothes on and drank water out of her shoe. We'll have what she's having. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5881323&view=rss&microfeed=true

I don't know if I've ever seen someone freak out at the idea of not being able to smoke weed as much as Jenelle did on last night's Teen Mom 2. After being put on probation stemming from an arrest for possession of drug paraphernalia, Jenelle's lawyer warned her not to do any drugs, drink any booze or "get in trouble" for an entire year. She didn't take the news very well, openly sobbing about how jealous she is of her boyfriend because he can go home and smoke a blunt while she cannot, because, as her mother has said, she's strung out on weed. While not being able to smoke weed for a year is, indeed, a bummer, it's just that — a bummer. It's not the end of the world. It's certainly not something you should cry about on camera when you're planning on regaining custody of your son. And speaking of her son, Jenelle must've gone about year without weed before anyway, seeing as how she was pregnant, right? Right? More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5881222&view=rss&microfeed=true

Anyone who's ever watched Dr. Oz at work knows that he is a hack of the first order. He'll happily push whatever magical berry or miracle elixir will pay him, passing it off as essential to keep you from dying—or worse, getting fat. He's a women's magazine with a mouth. So we were not shocked when a tipster alerted us to an especially craptastic email that one of her family members got from the production team at The Dr. Oz Show yesterday. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5881163&view=rss&microfeed=true

TLC has brought so much joy into our lives—Hoarding: Buried Alive, Sister Wives, I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant, and the list goes on—but now comes word of a true blessing that's about to be bestowed upon us by the network where different is always better. Preacher Wives will take place in Atlanta and follow the "outspoken ladies who work to ensure that their churches run as smooth as Southern-churned butter." Hallelujah! The show is being produced by True Entertainment, who also brought us The Real Housewives of Atlanta, so let's hope it won't be as snoozy as All-American Muslim and will lean more toward the Toddlers & Tiaras side of the crazy antics spectrum. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5881123&view=rss&microfeed=true

There's no way The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills could have a reunion show without confronting the dead, abusive elephant in the room: Russell Armstrong. The women were asked about their reactions to his suicide, and whether or not they ever witnessed him abusing his wife Taylor. While none of them actually saw him hit Taylor, Lisa Vanderpump describes an emotionally abusive text he sent Taylor while the two were in Las Vegas. He apparently thought she was having an affair with a Chippendales dancer. It's demonstrative of just how out of his mind he was, seeing as how no woman has ever had sex with a Chippendales dancer. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5881034&view=rss&microfeed=true

WINTER IS COMING. Or winter is here? I don't know what exactly winter is doing, but the trailer for season two of Game of Thrones looks amazing. Tyrion Lannister! Littlefinger! John Snow! Daenerys Targaryen and her dragon babies! Like they say, in the Game of Thrones, you live or you die and this preview has me DYING (you have permission to push me off the tower at Eyrie for that one). More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5880973&view=rss&microfeed=true

Last night, RuPaul's Drag Race returned with season four and a brand new flock of queens. Ones to watch: The macabre Sharon Needles, who has a "meth look" and a Tammy Faye Bakker tattoo and spit up fake blood on the runway; Kenya Michaels, a diminutive diva with a stunningly beautiful face some queens deem "fishy" — aka too girly; and Jiggly Caliente, the "Asian plus-size Barbie" with swagger. The theme of the episode was "Rupocalypse," and there were guest appearances by drag zombies, Elvira and Shangela, among others. The photo challenge was an homage to Alexander McQueen, and the runway show — as seen above — was "post-apocalyptic couture." Or as Lashauwn Beyond called it, "post apopkalakic." More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5880950&view=rss&microfeed=true

The only thing worse than not being able to hold the man you love in your arms is not being able to hold his boner in your vagina. And so is the case with Lady Mary and Matthew, after he suffered a spinal injury in the war. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5880651&view=rss&microfeed=true

There's really only one word to sum up the finale of Kourtney & Kim Take New York: Boxes. As their stay in New York was coming, everyone was packing up their clothes and belongings, and when confronted with Kris' boxes, Kim finally realized—given the tangible analogy provided by said boxes—that she didn't have room in her home for his clothes and didn't have room in her life for a husband. But before she arrived at that conclusion, there were so many conversations about the boxes. Kim wanted Kris' boxes shipped to Minnesota. He waned to ship his boxes to L.A. Kourtney agreed with Kris' idea about the boxes. Kim was having panic attacks just thinking about the boxes, and eventually, the boxes—and the loveless marriage they represented—made her cry. She called Khloe and Lamar and told them about the boxes. She had a heart-to-heart with Scott about the boxes. In the end, Kris wanted to make Kim happy, so he compromised and put the boxes in storage. A week later she filed for divorce. In an interview segment—no doubt taped well after their breakup—Kim admits that she's lived her life as an open book, saying, "I film everything, but there comes a time when you kind of just have to handle your issues privately." And thus, the Kardashian's reality empire transitions into a new season of Khloe & Lamar. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5880603&view=rss&microfeed=true

According to the Daily Beast — and just about everyone else in the know including you, just now — Oprah Winfrey and Barbara Walters are preparing to engage in a Thunderdome-like TV bidding war for the privilege of conducting Pippa Middleton's first full-length interview, in which she'll hopefully reveal all the secrets to party-planning her parents have been profiting off for the last two decades. (Oh, NBC is reportedly in the running too but Oprah vs. Barbara Walters is way more dramatic.) More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5880330&view=rss&microfeed=true

In this week's TV roundup, Stephen Colbert gets a lesson in children's literature, Jim Carrey's daughter auditions for American Idol and Anderson Cooper goes crazy for Fonzie. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5879816&view=rss&microfeed=true

The style on the red carpet of the premiere of NBC's Smash was like jazz hands but without the fingers. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5879948&view=rss&microfeed=true

Typically when she fights, she's beating up her fellow female cast members, but on last night's Jersey Shore Sammi got into it with a group of strangers, which led to a lot of writhing around on a grimy floor in a Seaside Heights club's basement. Unfortunately for the producers of the show, the beginning of the fight wasn't caught on camera (probably because following Sammi around isn't a priority for the film crew unless she's not getting along with Ronnie) but according to her, the brawl broke out after a girl pulled Sammi's hair. Make this mental note: Never yank Sammi's "newly weave" because she was taught to "self defend myself." More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5879979&view=rss&microfeed=true

Seal was on Access Hollywood today, spilling the contents of his heart to his ski buddy Billy Bush. In a voice that's equal parts whiskey and honey, Seal hinted that traveling, fame and tough schedules may have been the culprit — "when you decide to be globally known, you've got to service the globe. You just grow apart," he said. "It is what it is." He was not the scary, violent-tempered "monster" the tabloids have been calling him, and he seemed very concerned about his children: "We talked to them, we tried to explain as best we could, what is going on… Things will be different. The main thing is to make sure that they feel that they're loved." More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5879993&view=rss&microfeed=true

Rachel Dratch is always a blast to watch, but Billy Eichner, of Billy on the Street, really brings out the best in her. He puts her in a Snuggie and gives her a simple challenge: name 20 famous white people. It proves to be a very difficult task for her. I won't spoil the ending, but suffice it to say, she must not have a lot of white friends. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5879807&view=rss&microfeed=true

Riding the wave of success that Dance Moms has brought to the network, Lifetime is "bringing the format to the intensely competitive world of figure skating and revealing the explosive dynamic between the kids, parents and coaches who all want to be the best" with Ice Moms. But it doesn't stop there! The network also announced a Dance Moms spinoff with Dance Moms: Miami. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5879689&view=rss&microfeed=true

Nearly two months after the Words With Friends-American Airlines scandal threatened the very foundation of America itself, actor and national treasure Alec Baldwin has finally broken his silence on that fateful day when he was asked to leave an airplane because he wouldn't stop playing with his phone. Do you remember where you were when you found out? I was at Chipotle eating a burrito and I couldn't stop crying, but it was okay because everyone else at Chipotle was crying, too. It was horrible, but also cathartic in the way that tragic events can bring about people from all walks of life. I made eye contact with a cop who was eating nachos. "I can't believe," I said to him. "I mean, it's Alec..." The cop shook his head wordlessly and pulled me in for a hug. We stood there standing like that in that goddam Chipotle for God knows how long. We haven't seen or heard from each other since, but I like to think that he saw Alec Baldwin on Piers Morgan last night and thought of me like I thought of him then realized that everything was going to be okay. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5879553&view=rss&microfeed=true

On last night's premiere of the new season of Joan & Melissa, Joan Rivers got some more plastic surgery. Naturally, this required her to arrive at her surgeon's office sans makeup, and she allowed the reality cameras to capture what she really looks like. She's the first to admit it's not pretty. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5879299&view=rss&microfeed=true

After watching how Leah bathes her twin daughters on last night's episode of Teen Mom 2, it's apparent that the cast of the MTV hit reality show is not pulling in the big bucks that the media purports. Leah's life is essentially a country song. She and her husband Cory live in a rundown, one-bedroom trailer so now that Cory is going to get a better job as a coal miner Leah thinks they should buy a bigger, better trailer and park it on a property in a better neighborhood. One of the reasons for this is because their special-needs daughter Ali's physical therapist won't go to their home. The other reason is that they don't have a working bath tub in which to bathe the babies. As you can see in the clip above, Leah cleans her kids in a dank, dirty, unfinished basement that looks like the dungeon from Silence of the Lambs. (Who knew mobile homes had basements, anyway?) The tub does not have running water, but instead is placed beneath some exposed pipe on the ceiling—that happens to be next to some exposed electrical wires—and catches the water that is released. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5879134&view=rss&microfeed=true

Bethenny Frankel will crossover to daytime TV this summer, with Fox running a six-week test of her talk show Bethenny in certain markets, including New York and L.A. It seems that TV execs believe that the professional Skinnygirl—worth a reported $120 million—will prove to be relateable. "We determined there was a need in the marketplace for a show that provided daytime women the opportunity to hang out with…a girlfriend," said Warner Bros. Frank Cicha, who essentially just said that Bethenny's target demo will be friendless women who hang out on their couches watching TV in the middle of the day in the summer. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5878962&view=rss&microfeed=true

It's a well-known fact that women are always secretly plotting the quickest way to marriage. See a handsome man walking his dog in the park? Have a friend distract him while you quickly slip a ring on his finger — in some cultures that's as good as a legal contract — then get rid of that dog immediately so you can assure that your husband never loves anything in his life more than he loves you. Trying to start a life with your boyfriend without going into debt? LOL, not before you say yes to the dress, girl! More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5878774&view=rss&microfeed=true