After watching Teddy the Porcupine devour pumpkins on Halloween, many of the animal video experts in the comments came to the realization that Teddy is A) A Pixar character come to life and B) Clearly, the most awesome animal ever.

I did some extensive, exhausting blog research and it turns out that Teddy is part of Zooniversity, a teaching zoo that comes to you. OMG you guise he could come to us. Right here. And we could feed him corn. They make holiday videos with him every year, including Christmas, Valentine's Day and St. Patrick's Day, which is a day traditionally marked by a porcupine wearing a green bow tie.

But Teddy is just too awesome to feature only at sporadic holidays throughout the year!

I am therefor taking over Jezebel and I am taking over the SQUEE! section of this site and demanding that we feature an All-Teddy the Talking Porcupine section of this blog all the time! More Teddy videos! More Teddy features! Teddy guest-blogger articles! Teddy Election Night Commentary!

Who will join me in my brave fight? WHO AMONG YOU IS WITH ME?!!?!!

(BTW, the YouTube commenter in the above video is 100 percent, scientifically proven correct—at 00:47 he DOES say 'my corn!')