<![CDATA[Jezebel: The Cosmos]]> http://cache.jezebel.com/assets/base/img/thumbs140x140/jezebel.com.png <![CDATA[Jezebel: The Cosmos]]> http://jezebel.com/tag/the cosmos http://jezebel.com/tag/the cosmos <![CDATA[How Will Tonight's Lunar Eclipse Affect You?]]> Tonight, for the first time since 1378, a total lunar eclipse of a full moon falls on the winter solstice. OMFGWTFBBQ! What does it mean? More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5715348&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Photoshop Of Horror]]> Amazing. The woman who made millions by exploiting female insecurity - and devoted multiple, snarky covers of the tabloids she edited to close-up shots of cellulite - is invited on Today to offer expertise about the "empowerment" of unretouched photos. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5520170&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Cosmo: Buy Your Boyfriend Lucky Underwear, And Other Bad Romance Tips]]> It seems this month Cosmo's editors were on a mission to out-weird Lady Gaga by forcing her into a matronly girdle and beige bra and coming up with even more freakish relationship tips than usual. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5505612&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Cosmo: Rules (And Balls) Are Made To Be Broken]]> Have you and your man ever enjoyed a vegetarian meal or shopped together? According to Cosmo, you might as well cut off his balls. The only way to save your relationship: Dunk his testicles in sparkling water. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5451130&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Fun, Fearless, Female]]>

[Los Angeles, October 22. Image via INF]

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]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5388473&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[November Cosmo: "Bad Girls" Always Bend To Their Boyfriends' Whims]]> This month's Cosmo is for "sexy bitches only," so don't read on unless you're into topless feather-dusting, armpit kissing, and hog-tying your himbo. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5385937&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Cosmo: Powerful Women Use Their Vaginas, Not Their Voices]]> In the October issue of Cosmopolitan Megan Fox declares, "Women hold the power because we have the vaginas... If you're in a heterosexual relationship and you're a female you win." The editors say keeping your mouth shut works too! More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5380473&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Cosmo: Wear Your Dirty Panties Around Your Ponytail]]> I am mildly obsessed with Cosmo. A while back, I opined that my compulsive need to pull it from the newsstand is due to it being The Onion for feminists. The October issue is living up to that reputation. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5364263&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Cosmo: Answers To Unasked Questions, Meanings For Meaningless Actions]]> The July Cosmo: full of answers to burning questions like, "If I have many partners, will I become loose?" You know, questions that seem too random that they can't possibly be real. Oh, who cares...the joy is in the answers. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5291125&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Cosmo's "Sexy Issue" Does Helen Gurley Brown Proud]]> This month's Cosmo is "The Sexy Issue," meaning that after months of tough investigative reporting and cerebral cultural criticism, Cosmo is finally going to address what we truly care about: "his most dirty-licious fantasies." More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5207091&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Cosmo's Helen Gurley Brown: Does A Feminist Icon Please Her Man?]]> "If you're not a sex object, you're in trouble." See, it's quotes like this that tarnish Helen Gurley Brown's otherwise unimpeachable feminist legacy. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5206962&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[10 Things We Wish Guys Knew We Know]]> Today, Cosmo's website posted 10 Things Guys Wish We Knew. Guess what: We already knew them! (But, surely, you knew that.) In response we've compiled the 10 Things We Wish Guys Knew We Know. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5202558&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Cosmo Thinks Of Things You Would Never Think Of By Yourself]]> The March issue of Cosmo's "How To Stretch Your Clothes" story has a novel idea for those of you who like pricey, shredded designer jeans: Just cut holes in cheap jeans! Click to enlarge. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5145351&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Cosmo Turns Vamp Into Victim]]> In Underworld: Rise Of The Lycans, which made $20 million at the box office over the weekend, Rhona Mitra plays a sword-wielding vampire. But in Cosmo's February issue, she's a damsel in distress. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5139356&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Sampling The "Sexy" Sex Advice In Cosmo]]> If there's one thing Cosmo is known for, it's the sex. From sex positions to the quizzes to pitching products that are supposed to make you happier in bed, Cosmo has the most sexual content of any mainstream women's magazine. So I decided to see what my life would be like if I followed every single piece of sex advice the rag had to offer. (Except for that baloney about orgasm faces. I'm not interested in putting on a performance during my climax.) Some of it was disappointing, some of it was triumphant, but it all involved sex, so none of it could be that bad right? Right!? More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5098667&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[December Cosmo: This Season, May All Your Motives Be Ulterior]]> Are you having trouble "catching a dude's eye" and "reeling him in"? You probably have too many friends, says this month's Cosmo. Hanging out with just one or two other women will keep the focus where it's supposed to be — on men. And when you're at the bar with your one friend, don't stand too close together. Guys will think you're "engrossed in an intimate convo" — an activity that, as Cosmo has explained on numerous occasions, is actually mildly poisonous to men. The trick — and this applies equally in the bar or the bedroom — is to act like you're having fun when really, you're trying to impress guys. Because having just one motive per night is for slackers. And skanks. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5084348&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Once More, With Feeling: Ladymags Generate Anxiety Over "Orgasm Faces"]]> If you look closely, you'll see that there is a cover line on the new (December) issue of Cosmopolitan which reads: "Your Orgasm Face: What He's Thinking When He Sees It." Yeah, that's right: orgasm face. It's Cosmo's way of saying Happy Holidays! Actually, this is not the first time these words have appeared on the cover of a popular ladymag; back in April 2000, Glamour magazine ran a story called What Men Think About When They See Your Orgasm Face. It would be sorta funny if it weren't so revolting, insipid and infuriating. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5076223&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Sex, Guys, And Exclamation Points: Fun With October Cosmo]]> Last week we were concerned that Cosmo had gone minimalist, eliminating all but one paltry headline from its Kate-Hudson-emblazoned cover. Fearing we'd be deprived of the cover wisdom of Cosmo's sexy sex sexperts, we came up with a substitute. First, get 100 index cards. Write "sex" on 75 of them. Then write "guys" on 20. Fill the remaining 5 with whatever random numbers and punctuation marks you want. Then pull these out of a bag at random and you have your very own Cosmo cover lines. Example: "Sex? Sex!! 15,000,000 Guys?!?!?" Luckily, Cosmo came through for us after all — check out our version of the (real) October cover after the jump. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5048562&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Starlets Like Food And Men Like Sex In This Month's Cosmo]]> Magazines! You know they're all just glossy insecurity factories trying to suck your brain matter out through your thighs, but sometimes their cover lines are soooooooo tempting. Too bad they're all a lie! In "Cover Lies," former intern Cheryl Campbell and I rewrote the magazine covers to better reflect the stories within. We added up all the numbers in the cover lines of this month's Cosmo, and we got 334! Pointless? Yes — just like most of the articles these headlines reference. After the jump, we posit some more truthful teasers for September’s crop of Cosmo's please-your-man tips and unsettling beauty tricks. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5036365&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Fake Scientist Finds Real Humor In Crappy Cosmo Content]]> You can file this Onion News Network video, 'Cosmopolitan' Institute Completes Decades-Long Study On How To Please Your Man, under funny-cuz-it's-true. The ONN hosts interview "Dr. Steinberg" of the "Cosmo Institute." See, this is a "landmark week," because scientists have finally cataloged every possible way to please your man. Dr. Steinberg says, "We've accurately mapped every super-hot sex zone on a male human body, empirically proven to make your man's legs turn to jello." Thank goodness someone is taking on the important issues! "Cosmo's research center was founded to make sure that men everywhere get the most sexual pleasure humanly possible," Dr. Steinberg says. Ma'am, you are doing God's work. Clip above. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5034281&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Why Don't More Chicks Believe In Life On Other Planets?]]> Yo, I'm sorry, but people of the internet, stop instant messaging me about my job and go read Drudge!. There are ALIENS out there, and world governments have systematically been covering it up for sixty years, and it is no longer just Dennis Kucinich and Jimmy Carter saying this but A GUY WHO WALKED ON THE MOON who was not Neil Armstrong but, you know, Neil Armstrong believes in Jesus, they said so this time I went to Israel, and if you believe in Jesus you tend to disbelieve in aliens. ANYWAY, the point is, who is this guy? Just Edgar Mitchell, PhD. born in 1930, who just told an English rock radio station (huh? not the point! he'll be on Larry King next week so you can BELIEVE THEN) that that Roswell flying saucer was real and that he has seen aliens: More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5028738&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Cosmo Thinks Women With Integrity Are Total Failures]]> Cathy Alter might claim that women's magazines saved her life, but we're a little more skeptical. To crib a line from Cher Horowitz, looking for advice in a Cosmo quiz is as useless as searching for meaning in a Pauly Shore movie, and yet, something about the title of this quiz enticed me: Are You Destined For Success? Feeling reasonably content with my career trajectory, I thought to myself, I am totally going to ace this idiot quiz. How wrong I was! My lack of ruthlessness or duplicity caused Cosmo to term me an "Undetermined Dawdler." (BURN!!!) Here's the first question: "While shopping, you and a pal spot a top that you both love, but there's only one left. Do you let her have it?" The options are: A) Yeah, it's not worth fighting over. B) Hell no, you'll tear it out of her hands if you have to. C) You try to steer her toward another shirt that would look much hotter on her, hoping she'll take the bait. I chose A, because, you know, she's my friend and it's just a shirt. Wrong answer! More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5023836&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Cosmo's August 'Conversation Starter' Might Start Some Pretty Strange Conversations!]]> The new issue of Cosmo is here! And before we delved into what promises to be a riveting interview with Scarlett Johansson, we sated our thirst for "Conversation Starters," the monthly feature in which Cosmo editors offer up little tidbits of trivia that promise to "make you the most interesting person in the room — by far." Last month we learned about doga — yoga! for dogs! — and the contracts some brides-to-be are now dispensing to their bridesmaids prohibiting them from gaining weight. But this month…well, pushed the envelope just a bit further! Click for August's "perfect icebreaker"… More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5021553&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Mag Hag UK]]> One of the coolest things about being a blogger loosely connected to pop culture in a foreign country is that you don't feel bad not recognizing the faces on the covers of the women's magazines. Case in point: Denise Van Outen. Apparently she is renowned for flashing her boobs at Prince Charles, stealing an ashtray from Buckhingham Palace and dating someone named Jay Kay in the nineties. Like in Cosmo America they make her fill out a questionnaire filled with questions such as "The one thing I know about men that I wish I knew ten years ago is…" and her answer, "You have to let them think they came up with the idea," is pretty decent. Also, she advocates dating dudes in their twenties because that's when "all the good ones" get snatched up and weighs in on what is apparently a white-hot topic in Britain right now, WAGs. (Wives And Girlfriends of footballers, but you knew that, even if I had to actually Wikipedia it to make sure.) "It's all too easy to attack WAGs for being gold-diggers but, believe me, there are plenty of men who need that type of girl because it makes them feel happy." Reading Cosmo UK is to reading Cosmo America as eating a Chipotle burrito is to eating a pack of Bugles, which is neatly displayed in a reader letter you can see if you click the headline. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5017102&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Reading Cosmo is Like Having Quinn Morgendorffer Stand On Your Neck]]> Maybe it's the "beachy" weather. But something about this month's Cosmo blew out our enthusiasm clutches, making it suddenly difficult to type exclamation points or read anything in the magazine without hearing it in the voice of Daria. It's all Tracie's fault, for clipping the episode where Daria takes down the fictional Val magazine. You try watching it, only to sit down and read advice like "Invent a holiday that gives you an excuse to chow down on your favorite guilty pleasures, like First Friday Cookiefest, Cinco de Nachos, or Ice cream Brownie Sundays." (What, no pun with that?) Or how about: "Keep a set of beer mugs in your freezer. Never underestimate the amount of love and appreciation that an icy, frothed brew on a hot summer day inspires." Now, usually we'd be thinking "damn right I could use a beer right now!" But not today, probably because Daria was straightedge. After the jump, our inner Daria tries her hand at Cover Lies, and probably fails. To be honest, she doesn't particularly care. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=395713&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[MagHag]]> What do you say to people who say Cosmopolitan is anti-feminist? The New York Review of Magazines asks EIC Kate White. "People from the outside usually judge Cosmo that way, but the reader never does. So many of our readers write in to tell us about how empowered they are. That's what matters." I guess empowering American women to be sexually erotic is of paramount virtue to Cosmo readers, as White adds, "Readers don't come to Cosmo to learn about the genital mutilation of women in the Third World." When asked about her forebear, Helen Gurley Brown, White admits that she never really read Cosmo when Brown was running the show, and that she feels no pressure to be like the former editor because "our reader doesn't care about the past. She's all about the here and now." As long as the here and now doesn't include mutilated genitals! [NYRM] More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5009943&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Cosmo Dares You To Drip Hot Candle Wax Down His "Back Door"]]> We were SUPER scared when we saw the cover of this month's Cosmo. Not because that perfectly-centered pendant on Carmen Electra's chest looks like some sort of surveillance device planted by malevolent aliens! No, it was the word "sexy." Where is it? Aside from two instances in which it modifyies the words "hair" and "confidence," Cosmo's cover is starkly, notably, indisputably absent of the word "sex." What does mean? Is ita reflection on the chastened economy? The Hezbollah victory in Lebanon? We immediately flipped it open to find out. And mercifully enough, we were virtually BARRAGED with articles about S-E-X. One story suggested dripping hot candle wax down your boyfriend's asshole. Another said you should hide in a room with his phone, then call it, and surprise him by being NAKED when he comes to answer it. Cosmo had us thinking so dirty we were in the middle of a riveting story about how to use a curling iron when we started thinking sexily about ramming it up his "back door." Click the jump for more dirty thoughts! More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=391608&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Heroes' Sexy Kristen Bell Has The Handwriting Of A Hermit; Kidnapper]]> Just how many blondes are there on the show Heroes? And how many of them have been on the cover of Cosmopolitan over the past year? I don't know the answer to that first question — I've never watched the show — but as to the second, the answer is, three. (Someone at NBC primetime publicity is giving his/her bosses their money's worth.) In October, we saw Ali Larter; in April there was Hayden Panettiere; and now, come May, we've got Kristen Bell. The 28-year-old actress, like her predecessors, is not only subject to a short cover profile but the magazine's 'Cosmo Quiz', in which she fills out a questionnaire about her likes and dislikes... and gives us a reason have her handwriting analyzed by graphologist Sheila Kurtz. So how does Kristen come off? The short answer: she's extremely protective, ambitious, intuitive and decent. As for the long answer, well, all that's after the jump. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=386360&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[The Cosmos]]> "10 Questions You Can't Ask Anyone" was the tantalizing Cosmo Girl!cover line that won our hard-earned $3.49 this month. The touted story is a Nancy Redd advice column that addresses the usual array of teen "ick!" topics — stretch marks, itchy asses, third nipples. (One in 20 women have one!) But then there was this one, uh, unexpected question that for some reason doesn't seem made up. (Click the pic to see.) More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=384687&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Cosmo Girl!: Match Your Religion With Your MySpace Wallpaper!]]>
Men are... immeasurably interested in acquiring fixed ideas of God, of the soul, and of their common duties to their Creator and to their fellow men. This is, then, the subject on which it is most important for each of us to entertain fixed ideas; and, unhappily, it is also the subject on which it is most difficult for each of us, left to himself, to settle his opinions by the sole force of his reason.
So observed Alexis De Tocqueville in his seminal Democracy In America, whose 23rd chapter makes a worthy companion to a story on page 128 of the May Cosmo Girl! Because... like, how times change! Some modern teens have totally conquered the age-old need for a "fixed" higher power idea. The story begins by posing the radical question: "What if going to church were like going to Starbucks?" Um, and they were required by law to display the caloric content of the communion wafers? No, silly! "You wouldn't get just a plain coffee: You could get a shot of Catholicism, a sprinkle of Buddhism, a pinch of Hindu teachings — or whatever else you're in the mood for that day." More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=384817&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Well Isn't The Cosmo"Sexy Issue" Just A Sexy Breath Of Fresh Sexual Sexy Sex Air!]]> Oh goody it's the Cosmo "Sexy Issue"! We've been waiting all year for Cosmo to finally address the underexplored topic of s-e-x. They address "sex" with classic Cosmo understatement, of course: "sex" appears in only six places on the cover, meaning the word "sex" itself represents a relatively restrained 7.5% of words on the cover, in much the way that you will really find the word "fuck" in no more than 10% of the words you read on the average Jezebel post. Anyway! The Sexy Issue is really a goldmine, starting with what may be the magazine's most ingenious yet use of food in a sex act — click to find out what it is! — and an engaging interview with actress Kristen Bell, who, like most other Cosmo cover subjects, stars in the television show Heroes. Click to see the May Cosmo as interpreted by "Cover Lies," in which we rewrite the mag covers to more accurately reflect the sexy content within. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=377986&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[How The Brazilian Explains The World]]> The May Cosmo is here! And it wouldn't be a Cosmo "Sexy Issue" if it didn't come equipped with a scintillating (or something-ating!) think piece on the numerous societal implications of the mass-acceptance of Brazilian waxing. No really! It's on page 233, but I'll summarize: Men of a certain age now expect you to be bald, no more hiding those genital warts either, genital plastic surgery is up 30%...actually, the thing is too awesome not to scan. Click the pic for my three personal favorite excerpts. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=377408&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Cosmo Reminds You To Bring The Bucket Of Ice Next Time You Have Sex]]>

It's time again for Cover Lies, wherein Cheryl and Maria rewrite the cover lines of major mass-market women's magazines to better reflect the content within. Not that you were considering actually buying "Cosmo"!

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]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=366921&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[MagHag]]> An unfortunate side-effect of working for Jezebel (besides the carpal tunnel, that is) is that we acquire enough issues of Cosmo to fill the waiting room of a third-rate day spa. But, while organizing my collection of ladymags, I noticed an image forming on the spine of my Cosmos. The picture is the bottom half of a man lying playfully on a bed, without his shirt (because they don't have enough half-naked men in the magazine to begin with!). Dodai wonders if anyone other than us (and beauty salons) are keeping the issues around long enough to see the image form. Tracie asks if the picture was of someone famous (perhaps "Fun, Fearless Male" John Mayer?). What do you think, European model or mildly famous male celebrity? Stock photo from the late '90s or Chad Michael Murray (he's still a thing, right) or both? Click on the photo to see a larger version. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=365150&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Why New York Sucks]]> The April Cosmo goes bar-hopping at some local dives and snaps photos of couples talking to submit them for body language analysis. This guy's body language revealed him to be the biggest player. Click on the pic to see. His face is blurred out, but seriously... More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=364309&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Ooooooh Mommy: Cosmo Said The "Jay-Jay" Word!]]> Yay! We are back with more Cover Lies! This month, Cosmo achieved the impossible. It made the slang term "Va-Jay-Jay" even more cringetacular! See, it's not okay to just emblazon the word "Vagina" really big on a magazine, because then all the blogs will write "Ha ha ha Cosmo said 'VADGE'" and set off a domino-effect of third grade humor. So we are glad Cosmo took the mature road by employing euphemisms like "lovely lady parts" and illustrating the vagina package — heh! — with photos of oranges and grapefruits and vinegar bottles ("Every chick has a different scent!") and E. coli under a microscope. Reading about my "V-zone" and what men think about when they masturbate (hint: sex) is like a trip down the self-hating, socially awkward, sexually misguided locker room years of early adolescence! Anyway, to that end, Cosmo's cover lines are great, but they do not do justice to the succulent fruit inside. Graphic design guru/Jezebel intern Cheryl Campbell and I update the cover lines, after the jump. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=357764&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[My Cosmo Advice: Why "Ask Him" When You Can Ask Me?]]> Cosmo has a (seemingly new) advice column on its website called "Ask Him Anything", and though it may come as a shock to some, we kind of expected better from the ingenious magazine that brought us the cover line "Dirty Sexy Sex". But that's okay, because we were feeling service-y today and decided to re-answer some questions ourselves, starting with More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=355633&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[45 Ways To Seem Even More Clingy, And Other Things You'll Learn In This Month's Cosmo]]> If there's one thing we've learned in doing this blog, it's that you can't judge a ladymag by its cover. A cover touting a new diet tip can lead you to a story about a woman battling heart disease (True Story!) and we are pretty sure all those big numbers come from a fortune cookie, because we've never been able to fact-check them. After the jump, loyal Jezebelles Maria and Cheryl actually read Cosmo — haven't you always wanted to know how to use the power of body language to seem like a more understanding best friend? — and redesign the cover to more accurately reflect what's inside. More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=347422&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Decoding Cosmo Cover Girl Katie Heigl: "She Refuses To Waste Time With Convoluted Crap"]]> Katherine Heigl didn't seem to take the "Cosmo Quiz" — the written Q&A actresses are forced to take to qualify as a Cosmopolitan cover subject — very seriously. For most of the questions, such as "I think it's sexy when a guy..." and, "My favorite male co-star has been..." she circled all five multiple choice options the magazine's editors provided. Um, did they not teach you the difference between superior and superlative in America's Sweetheart preparatory academy, Katie? Or is it just because you don't take many things that seriously at all? (Here's Katie regarding her dis on Isiah Washington: "You can't give me too much credit for being brave. I was just a girl who had had a couple of drinks and was angry and got mouthy. I really did think if would fuck me.") We'll leave the handwriting-shrinking to our inimitable penmanship analyst Sheila Kurtz, who sees a great many admirable qualities — and perhaps a few stray self-destructive ones? — in Katie's answers to such questions as "I am sometimes mistaken for..." (A: "myself...that's awkward"!) More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=346620&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[ This is the teaser from the latest issue...]]> This is the teaser from the latest issue of Cosmo's "Red Hot Read," an excerpt from the book Strong & Sexy by Jill Shalvis. (page 214). I'm just trying to figure out how you could make this sentence even more hot. Maybe if you added the phrase "Skinny Cow"? Or if, instead, the ice cream dripped down into the crevice between his penis and the scrunchie she'd tied around it? More »
]]> http://jezebel.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=346160&view=rss&microfeed=true