Time is a flat circle, especially when I am high and inside my couch looking at Vine on my phone. It is my most fulfilling comfort behavior—the closest, I think, someone can get to being in utero without actually being in utero.

I’m sure a lot of articles will tell you that the success of a Vine is dependent on a number of things, but I am not going to explain those things in this article because this article isn’t about achievement, it is about experience. I will say, however, that the kinds of Vines I enjoy the most are generally not Vines created by members of the Los Angeles elite Vine “scene”—a scripted vignette of what happens when bae gets mad, or your mom tells you to do your homework. I know what happens then; I don’t need you to show me.

No, my favorite Vines are the spontaneous ones; the ones that show that a person was really scared or injured, or that a group of people are having fun, or an animal is doing something stupid. These show humanity at its most raw—not humanity very obviously trying to get some kind of talent-holding contract.

Advertisement

I have arranged my favorites into categories for easy viewing.

Author’s Note: Click the top left corner of the Vine to turn sound on (sound is key). Also, captions should generally be ignored except when explicitly stated otherwise.

Type One: Reporters Being Scared By Animals

Type Two: Dope Animals

Type Three: Pop Culture Vines

Type Four: People Who Are Killing It In General

Are these still funny in the sober light of day? Yes, they are the funniest things I’ve ever seen. God bless, and happy 2016.


Contact the author at joanna@jezebel.com.