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Sex Sounds: How Loud Is Too Loud?

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madeofawesome
11/10/09

In reply to Sex Sounds: How Loud Is Too Loud?
In my experience, people who scream loud enough for their neighbors and random passerby to hear are...

faking it. #loudsex
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cirocco
11/10/09

@madeofawesome: In my experience, those who resent noisy lovemaking are envious, prudish, or both. #loudsex
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madeofawesome
11/10/09

@cirocco: Or private people? #loudsex
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whynotshesaid
11/10/09

In reply to Sex Sounds: How Loud Is Too Loud?
It's one thing to get a bit noisy. It's another thing to scream bloody murder while you are doing it. One can be controlled, the other cannot.

Unless he is stabbing you with something other than his penis, of course. #loudsex
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Sarah Dove
11/11/09

@whynotshesaid: There's also an element of 'crying wolf' here. I don't mean that she is faking it, but that if the neighbours get used to hearing a woman screaming, they are less likely to react appropriately if they hear a woman screaming because she's in trouble. Wouldn't it be awful if they all just thought 'oh, it's that noisy mare next door' and someone was being assaulted? #loudsex
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whynotshesaid
11/11/09

@Sarah Dove: Oh, that's a good point. Hadn't thought about that.

At any rate, I question the need to be THAT loud during sex. A certain amount of noise is normal, but you have to put in effort beyond that. #loudsex
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Biku
11/10/09

In reply to Sex Sounds: How Loud Is Too Loud?
My feeling is: noise is noise. I don't want to hear my neighbours having sex any more than I want to hear their stupid dog at 3am.

Both are natural sounds. Both are annoying as hell when you want to sleep. #loudsex
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JerkoftheMonth
11/10/09

In reply to Sex Sounds: How Loud Is Too Loud?
This pisses me off a lot. I had neighbours for the past 2 years that had loud sex all the time and it was infuriating to wake up at 3 in the morning to other people's sex noises. I think it's really disrespectful. I do not want to know when other people are doing it. Another time my little sister was visiting (a good few years ago) and my upstairs neighbours had loud sex and I was praying that my 12 yr old sister didn't wake up to that sound. Grrr. Makes me so mad! #loudsex
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SpiceMustFlow
11/10/09

In reply to Sex Sounds: How Loud Is Too Loud?
I tend to get a little screamy when it's really good, but usually have just enough functioning brain cells to remember to grab a pillow to stuff over my mouth at the crucial moment.

My boyfriend, though... he's the real screamer of the two of us. "Ah.. ah.. AH.. AH!... AHHaaahhh!" It turns me on, but also makes me wonder why none of the neighbours in his apartment building have never called the cops- it sounds like someone getting stabbed. Thick walls, hopefully? #loudsex
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stacyinbean
11/10/09

@SpiceMustFlow: I LOVE loud men. Why can't there be more of them? #loudsex
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SpiceMustFlow
11/10/09

@stacyinbean: It really is the biggest turn-on, and kind of flattering! Contrast this with the guys who maintain a grim silence throughout: makes me wonder if their formative years of sex-having were all in basement rec rooms, trying to keep the noise down because Mom and Dad are right upstairs. #loudsex
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stacyinbean
11/11/09

@SpiceMustFlow: hahahha that's such a good point, I've only been with one guy that was REALLY expressive and it was SO HOT. #loudsex
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PhillyLass
11/09/09

In reply to Sex Sounds: How Loud Is Too Loud?
I don't mind that I can hear my neighbors' muffled sex sounds. I live in an old house that has been converted into apartments and I expect a certain level of noise in such close and poorly insulated quarters. But if I heard the sex sounds of, say, people in adjacent buildings or-- even more improbably-- people across the street, it would piss me off. Involuntary sex moans at a decent volume are normal. Super loud sex moans that the whole neighborhood can hear are exhibitionist. #loudsex
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Ipomoea
11/09/09

In reply to Sex Sounds: How Loud Is Too Loud?
After living above a meth- and alcohol-fueled sex screamer, I say throw the book at them. 90 minutes of "OH OH OH FUCK YEAH FUCK YEAH" etc at 3a.m. on a Wednesday, despite neighbors on three sides pounding on your shared walls? Rot in hell, some of us have to get up at 6a.m. I've heard some natural sex moans, and then there's the "the louder it is, the better it must sound to our houseguests" sex moans. Here's a tip: I don't judge you as a person for how good your sex sounds. I do judge you for waking me out of my REM sleep as you shriek like a monkey. #loudsex
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yvanehtnioj
11/09/09

@Ipomoea: This is my favorite rant I've read today! I enjoy your remembered ire. #loudsex
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Faster.Pussycat
11/09/09

In reply to Sex Sounds: How Loud Is Too Loud?
Man oh man my ex boyfriend had a loud neighbor and thin walls. You could hear all sorts of banging and thumping when her and her boyfriend went at it. One night, after Mr. Pussycat and I were in bed for the night, we hear the banging and thumping start to the tune of thumpa thumpa thumpa THUMPA THUMPA ka-thump bump crash bang silence... Me and the Mr. busted a gut laughing, which I am sure they heard.
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FourInchHeels promoted this comment Edited by Faster.Pussycat at 11/09/09 10:04 PM Faster.Pussycat was starred Faster.Pussycat was unstarred

FourInchHeels
11/10/09

@Faster.Pussycat: I had an upstairs neighbor that happened to! But his gf was a jealous psychopath, so I texted him immediately after asking if she was ok (loud ass bedsprings +thin ass walls) and then the sex quit and the screaming began. I shouldn't be proud of myself, but I was. #loudsex
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FatterKitty
11/09/09

In reply to Sex Sounds: How Loud Is Too Loud?
Noise is noise...just last week, I was violently woken up from a pleasant Saturday afternoon nap by my downstairs neighbor's belching. I'm on the third floor, the dude was on his patio on the first floor....

Only satisfying aspect of this incident was being able to resort to full-scale crabby-old-lady mode: "This is NOT a frat house! And you should see a doctor!" #loudsex
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Faster.Pussycat
11/09/09

@FatterKitty: Get offa my lawn!

Go you. That's awesome. #loudsex
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yvanehtnioj
11/09/09

@Faster.Pussycat: @FatterKitty: I enjoy the juxtaposition of your names, and feel like you should post in tandem more often. #loudsex
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FatterKitty
11/10/09

@Faster.Pussycat: Thank you! I am looking forward to my wrinkles-and-housecoat years--that will bring more gravitas to any future scoldings.

Truly, I have no patience for behavior that is a) inappropriate and
b) impinges upon my quality of life.

There are amazing numbers of people out there who seem to feel that because no one says anything, their vulgarity is acceptable.

Sometimes, public shaming is the answer. #loudsex
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scandalouskiki
11/09/09

In reply to Sex Sounds: How Loud Is Too Loud?
I've had the noisy-sex neighbor before, and while I'm all for people having good sex and enjoying it, I still find it extremely rude for them to have LOUD sex at 4:00 am. I'm talking screams, encouragement, headboard slamming the wall, the works. Naturally this would wake me up each time it happened. It was loud enough that the neighbor that lived below me could also hear it. Everyone has a right to their sex life, but people need to be respectful of general quiet hours and at least try to keep it down. It's the considerate thing to do. #loudsex
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RiloKilo
11/09/09

@scandalouskiki: Exactly. It's just common sense and consideration - which is apparently one of the most difficult things for some people to comprehend. #loudsex
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callmecountry
11/10/09

@scandalouskiki: Quite. I regularly get woken up in the early hours by my downstairs neighbour's sex operetta. The worst thing is that her turns of phrase are so cliched (v. When Harry Met Sally), that I wonder whether she's actually enjoying it at all. Then I get over that, remember she's an idiot anyway, and shout through the floorboards for her to shut the eff up. #loudsex
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tiredfairy
11/09/09

In reply to Sex Sounds: How Loud Is Too Loud?
I live in a condo complex in CA. We like to keep the back patio doors open at night, you get a lovely breeze from the ocean. You can hear our neighbors if they're in their adjacent patios, or the garages below, but most of the time, you really can't hear anyone at all unless they're outside and being loud.

Well, one memorable Saturday night, someone forgot to shut their bedroom window next door. And we were treated to two sessions of what sounded like incredibly fun sex. That girl was into it, and she was having a lot of fun. The first session, roughly at midnight, involved a lot of orgasms, and something that buzzed. The next session, at roughly 1am, was a bit slower and had some really long and gratifying sounding orgasms.

We sat out our on patio (as did our teenage neighbors, I could hear them giggling behind the wall). I had a glass of wine, and spied one of our other neighbors across the way sitting at her upstairs windowsill doing the same.

Apparently the whole neighborhood was enjoying the entertainment. I may or may not have twittered the entire show.

I really don't mind hearing sex, so long as it's at a reasonable hour, and it's not deafening. #loudsex
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Ginmar Rienne
11/09/09

@tiredfairy: Ew. I just don't want to get that intimate with people I don't know. Or am not having sex with myself. It's a private thing. Open windows are one thing; beyond that, if it's like this couple, I have to wonder if they're just plain exhibitionists, and if so, I don't want to be part of their little scene. #loudsex
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tiredfairy
11/09/09

@Ginmar Rienne: Well, in this instance, it was clearly an accident. I don't think they intended that the whole complex here the evening events.

I think I'd probably get annoyed if I had to hear it a lot. At a certain point, you've got to know you're being inconsiderate. But I don't want to judge other people's consensual sex lives, or say you can't be noisy sometimes. Sex doesn't always allow you the ability to be quiet. Still, I believe in courtesy. #loudsex
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SIS656
11/09/09

In reply to Sex Sounds: How Loud Is Too Loud?
you can tell that men came up with those biological theories for women moaning considering how male-centric they are- seems more likely to me that a woman moaning is a form of non-verbal communication of what is pleasurable- especially since more research is indicating that female orgasms promote the chances of conception, that's an important thing for a man to know (from an evolutionary perspective)
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yvanehtnioj
11/09/09

@SIS656: Yeah, the idea that moaning when you feel good means you want guys to line up for their turn instead of you want the guy you're fucking to keep licking/sucking/rubbing right there is a weird and kind of creepy leap. "Uh, it's probably from caveman gang bang days!" is a very bizarre association. That guy's probably bad in bed. #loudsex
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Ineedmorecowbell
11/09/09

In reply to Sex Sounds: How Loud Is Too Loud?
Having children generally quietens you down. It takes so long to get them to sleep you certainly don't want to wake them up. #loudsex
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Dictator for Life
11/09/09

In reply to Sex Sounds: How Loud Is Too Loud?
I don't have a problem with my neighbors hearing me and my sweetie do it; I have a problem with the dog. As soon as my fiancé puts it in, the dog seems to know. He starts keening. It wasn't too bad when we lived in the country, but now we live in a New York City apartment. We have to make sure that not only are we silent, but all the doors in the apartment must be closed, and we have to be super-careful that the bed doesn't jiggle. I would love to figure out how to stop the dog from going nutso when we do it. #loudsex
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rocknrollunicorn
11/09/09

@Dictator for Life: Oh man, that sucks. My parents' dog is in love with my dad and used to lay outside their bedroom crying when they did it. Yeah, I know too much about my parents' sex life. #loudsex
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pesematology
11/09/09

In reply to Sex Sounds: How Loud Is Too Loud?
If 47 decibels is criminal, what do you think those of us in noise bands feel like? #loudsex
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