Archie Is Getting the CW Treatment in a New Television Show

Archie, the red-headed teen of comic book fame, is getting his own television show. Variety reports that teen melodrama factory CW announced that it has ordered a pilot for the television show Riverdale, a show based on Archie and his famous friends.
Sorry Azaleans, Iggy Azalea Is 'Not Allowed' To Make a Music Video for 'Azillion'
Bad news for Azaleans—who, despite their sci-fi-sounding moniker are Iggy Azalea superfans and not inhabitants of an alien planet on Star Trek—Azalea will not be releasing a video for her new track “Azillion.” In a series of tweets, Azalea said that Ted Cockle, the president of Virgin EMI records, doesn’t want to let…
12 Days of Christmas Presents Past: Here--Have a Brita Filtration Pitcher
As a sort of advent calendar of kitsch, Pictorial will be counting down the final twelve days before Christmas by featuring some holiday presents of days gone by.
NO
On Tuesday, NBC News reported that soggy burlap sack Donald Trump will host Saturday Night Live on November 7 with musical guest Sia.
Ciara Covered The Rolling Stones's 'Paint It Black' For a Vin Diesel Movie About Witches
This is an Instagram video posted by Ciara, temporarily celibate recording artist, in which she shares a snippet of her new song, “Paint It Black.” The track (which Ciara describes as “unreal”) was originally performed by The Rolling Stones (whom Ciara describes as “one of music’s Greatest Bands), and was recorded for…
Your Midwife Really, Really Shouldn't Be a Dolphin
We’ve been telling you this literally since 2008, but “dolphin-assisted” births are really not a good idea. Really. It almost seems like this shouldn’t need saying?
Where Are the Groupies of Aurora Shooter James Holmes Now?
On July 20, 2012, James Holmes entered a movie theater in Aurora, Colorado and killed 12 people (70 others were injured). Immediately after, James Holmes fan sites—most of them helmed by young women—began appearing on Tumblr. At the time, many of these women proclaimed him to be innocent, but now, two years later, he…
Watch Hannibal Buress Track Down and Confront an Angry Twitter Troll
Hannibal Buress’ new weekly Comedy Central series Why? premiered on Wednesday night and featured a bit where the host comes face to face with a trash-talking Twitter troll with the handle @NotAFannibal.
The Collarbone Challenge: Is the Challenge to Find 50 Quarters?
We haven’t even gotten over #TheBellyButtonChallenge yet and we already have to grapple with a new ridiculous and wholly unsubstantiated standard of beauty: The Collarbone Challenge.
Katy Perry's Lawyers Won't Let This Dude Sell a 'Left Shark' Tchotchke
[Long, tired sigh.] So you know how the "left shark" dancing next to Katy Perry at the halftime show became the breakout viral hit of the Super Bowl? Well, naturally, somebody decided to capitalize on the left shark's popularity. And now Katy Perry has unleashed her lawyers on him. It's come to this.
'Sex With You' Music Video Ruins Sex, Music, Videos
I don't know who Avery is, but I can't stop watching the god-awful (I am so sorry, Avery!) video for this song, which features some amazing hair and some even more amazing lyrics. "I should have broke your dick in two"? Sign me up for the mailing list. I don't want to miss a second of Avery's career.
Uplifting Tales And Hella Dicks: This Is Fapworthy And It's Your Fault
If you can't watch porn unless you're being emotionally manipulated into it ("You'll never look at a coke can the same way again!") then Fapworthy is for you. A fun new site that pairs hardcore videos with irritating feel-good hooks? What could be more internet than that? And you know what? It's all your fault.
Jezebel's Advent Calendar of Crap, Day 2: The Sound of Music, Live!
Welcome back to Jezebel's Advent Calendar of Crap, an accounting of the pop cultural travesties barreling down the track towards us. Yesterday, we discussed the sadly inevitable Fifty Shades of Grey movie. Today's edition: NBC's insultingly unnecessary live production of The Sound of Music.
