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dirt bag
Capitol Goes Cuckoo For Brad & Nancy
- Nancy Pelosi left a health-care forum at the White House to meet with Brad Pitt. This piece calls them "Brancy." [WaPo]
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Dirt Bag (After Dark)
Chris Brown Assault Account Released; Rihanna's Family Can't Reach Her
- New details on Rihanna: The warrant detailing the entire assault has been released, her family says she's changed her contact information, and her rep isn't denying that she and Chris are engaged.
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vince vaughn
Why Straight Dudes Are Comfortable With Their Vince Vaughn Love
Last week we briefly mentioned an Esquire profile of Vince Vaughn in which the writer, Chris Jones, exhibits his obsession with Vaughn's physical prowess. Well, now that the full article is up on Esquire's website, it's clear that Jones has fallen head over heels for Vaughn in what could be the one-sided literary bromance of the decade. Jones not only coos over Vince's "great golden acreage," but he also creams over Vaughn's political aptitude ("his impassioned take on the Israeli—Palestinian conflict is like listening to Khrushchev banging his shoe on the podium"), and his skill as a confidant ("he's really listening, as though someone's grabbed him by the shoulders"). Three quarters of the way through the interview, Jones declares his undying love: "Vaughn sits back, picks up his drink, surveys his audience, and he smiles that really nice smile of his. He's loving this. He's loving that we've fallen in love."
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vince vaughn
Loose Lips
The Esquire writer who profiled Vince Vaughn could not get over the actor's largeness. Chris Jones describes the star as “the biggest man in the room," possessing "great golden acreage…too much to ignore." Then Jones wrties about how Vaughn teamed up with Mothra and terrorized some Japanese villagers. • Seemingly superhuman Angelina Jolie admits that she gets tired. "I woke up at 3 in the morning with four kids with jet lag and two babies," Angelina says. • Someone finally bought Neverland Ranch, Michael Jackson's creepy Santa Barbara compound. The buyer is Sycamore Valley Ranch Company LLC. If the google results for Sycamore Valley Ranch are any indication, Michael's old stomping ground will soon be either a horse farm or an RV Park. [Newser, People, Perez] -
the good, the bad & the ugly
Iron Man Premiere: The Bold, The Beautiful, The Jumpsuit On Gwyneth
After a gajillion and a half screenings and press junkets, the Iron Man movie finally had its official premiere last night in Los Angeles. And. Um. How best to phrase this? Well: Gwyneth Paltrow wore a jumpsuit. Yes, a jumpsuit. (See left; larger image after the jump.) Fortunately, the movie's lead, Robert Downey, Jr., stepped it up: He and wife Susan both embodied old-school Hollywood style. Who else was there? Funny you should ask: Ben Stiller and Christine Taylor, Billy Corgan (!), Emmanuelle Chirqui, Jennifer Grey (!!), Sean "Diddy" Combs, Beau Bridges, Pete Wentz, Terrence "Baby Wipes" Howard, Vince Vaughn, Jack Black, Rosanna Arquette and more. The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly, all after the jump. More » -
dirt bag
Pamela Anderson: Also Pregnant
- Pamela Anderson is pregnant. And getting divorced. And asking for spousal support. But not child support. It's OK, take a minute. We'll wait. [TMZ]
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In Brief
Loose Lips
Here's Johnny Depp's Rolling Stone cover. You're WELCOME. • Arrests are expected to be made soon in the Miss Puerto Rico pepper spray incident. The police will leave no sequin unturned. • Did Vince Vaughn veto sex scene with Reese Witherspoon in their upcoming movie Four Christmases? [Rolling Stone, People, Hollywood Rag] -
In Brief
Loose Lips
Haha, Vince Vaughn looks like he's fellating an ice cream cone in this picture. Slow news day, people! • Is Katie Holmes teaming with Christina Aguilera for a new movie called Humboldt Park? Sounds like a match concocted in the brain of a horny 14 year-old boy in 1998! [A Socialite's Life, Dlisted] -
dirt bag
Britney: Overly Anxious Or Just Bratty?
- Britney Spears missed her deposition yesterday because she was freaking the fuck out. Her "friend" Sam Lufti said, "She's sick, both physically and high anxiety. Millions of press outside. It's too much." And yet she makes it to Starbucks. [People]
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time was, son, men with embarrassing physical traits had to develop personalities
Cures For Men With Bosoms
Did we remind the plastic surgery industry today how fucking thankful we are for its existence? Not only has it given the ludicrously intelligent, outrageously well-educated individuals who actually passed surgery school a way to pay back their student loans free from the bureaucratic hassles of the HMOs, but there is almost no emerging self-esteem threat it cannot fix. Case in point: Man boobs. They're an epidemic! But according to the 'Thursday Styles' section of the New York Times, as long as you are affluent, that's okay!"My nephew wouldn't take his shirt off in public," Dr. Kotler said. "He wouldn't go to the beach, which in California is a pretty big deal."In the past, doctors said, 'Oh, he'll grow out of it.' He decided not to grow out of it, but to have the procedure... Here was the shyest, most introverted kid you could ever meet," he said. "And now, well, he's the polar opposite of the shy kid. Guess what he does now? He's a Hollywood agent."
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end of days
Jennifer Aniston Proves Wit And Charm Don't Matter In A Man: It's All About Having A Tight Ass
- Jennifer Aniston just says no to that more rotund Vince Vaughn and picks herself up a male model named Paul Sculfor (who we show you almost-nudie, to the left) to date instead. [People.com]
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midweek madness
TomKat In Trouble, The Attack Of The Bloated Boobs, And Jennifer Aniston's Love Life
Welcome to Midweek Madness, our weekly orgy of ill-fated hookups, grand philanthropic gestures and other celebphemera. Here we "read" the Wednesday celebrity tabloids. So you don't "have" to. More » -
jennifer aniston
We're just sitting here hugging ourselves.
We're contemplating naming December 6th Jennifer Aniston day, in tribute to her blinding brilliance in messing with the celeb weeklies. More » -
jennifer aniston
Machiavelli couldn't have planned it better.
We salute you Jennifer Aniston - you truly know how to fuck with the celebrity weeklies! More » -
magazines
Who's fat? Who's lonely? Who's feuding? Celebrity weekly round-up after the jump.
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