• Tina Fey won the Emmy for Best Guest Actress in a Comedy last night for her portrayal of Sarah Palin on Saturday Night Live.Accepting the award, Fey thanked her parents, "who are lifelong Republicans, for their patience." [AP]

• Justin Timberlake also won an Emmy for his guest stint on SNL, and Joss Whedon picked up an Emmy as well, for Dr. Horrible's Sing Along Blog. [E!]
• An insider claims that VH1 is scaling back on their reality programming after the tragic death of Jasmine Fiore at the hands of former VH1 contestant, Ryan Jenkins. "They are freaking out," says the source, "It's bad for their image to continue casting crazy characters. Producers realize the whole reality-TV thing has gotten completely out of hand. Two of their shows featured a murderer." [PageSix]
• Tyler Perry's I Can Do Bad All By Myself topped the box office Friday, bringing in 8.6 million dollars. [EW]
• "It's everything you could imagine and more."-Gossip Girl's Joanna Garcia on kissing her co-star, Chace Crawford. [People]
• Steven Soderbergh says he won't make an Ocean's Fourteen because Bernie Mac has passed away: "For me it was three (movies) and out but any possibility of ever revisiting that ended when Bernie Mac died. I don't think any of us would want to go back and do that without him, so that's it." [DailyExpress]
• "I remember people saying, 'Believe me, everything in your life is going to change…' And I thought, 'Why? That's such a bourgeois way of thinking.' And then you have a child and yes, everything changes. It affects the way we live, what we do and where we go – everything. And I wouldn't have it any other way."-Maggie Gyllenhaal [DailyMail]
• "Everyone's childhood shapes them, doesn't it, but often it's not until later in life that you realise you can choose to take bits of it with you, and reject other bits. People assume we had a crazy life, which we did, but it wasn't that crazy. On some levels it was quite normal. I mean we weren't like the Jaggers or anything, always hanging out with other celeb families. That would've been weird."-Jack Osbourne [DailyMail]
• "If you look around at girls who are older than me who are children of celebrities, hardly any of them have matured, hardly any of them have grown up to be… I wouldn't say decent human beings, but productive human beings. They are not bad people; they just don't do anything and I don't want to have a life where I don't have a reason to get out of bed every morning. And a reason to me isn't who I'm having lunch with at Fred Segal."-Kelly Osbourne [Guardian]
• Guy Richie plays guitar in an Irish ceilidh group and says "a good music session with these Irish lads is unbeatable. Better than any Madonna concert or anything." [DailyMail]
• After a media executive tore a picture of her in two, angry that she skipped an after-party for her new film at the Toronto Film Festival, Jennifer Connelly appeared in tears at a press conference the next day, explaining that she skipped the party in order to grieve the first anniversary of her father's death. The exec has since apologized. [EdmontonSun]
• 64-year-old Michael Douglas says that directors won't cast him as a romantic lead anymore. "No love-interest stuff for me now. I play the bad guy, the rough old villain. My character is that duplicitous meanie I somehow specialise in." [Telegraph]
• John Travolta and Kelly Preston made their first public appearance since the death of their son, Jett, nine months ago, in order to promote Travolta's new film, Old Dogs. [People]
• Elton John says that he's thinking of adopting a 14-month-old Ukranian baby: "David and I have always talked about adoption," he says, "David always wanted to adopt a child and I always said 'no' because I am 62 and I think because of the traveling I do and the life I have, maybe it wouldn't be fair for the child. But having seen Lev today, I would love to adopt him. I don't know how we do that but he has stolen my heart." [Reuters]
• "I think the way I behave is normal for someone my age and in my situation. I know a lot of guys in bands who go to awards ceremonies and get into the same sort of states that I get myself into, and that's not negatively reported on. So it feels kind of unjust."-Lily Allen [DailyMail]
• Jay Leno claims that NBC executives wanted him to turn over the Tonight Show to Conan earlier than he actually did: "Actually, they wanted me out in three years," Leno says the network told him five years ago, "I had to argue to get the other two." [UPI]
• "I don't hang out with Rob or Kristen.They are attractive humans, yes they are. I'm nice with Rob also. I look great with him too. I think I look better with Rob…Rob's awesome. I love him to death."-Kellan Lutz on his Twilight co-stars, Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson. [ShowbizSpy]

According to police, Fiore, 28, was strangled to death and stuffed in a suitcase, which was found on Saturday morning in a trash receptacle in Buena Park, California. Jenkins, 32, had reported Fior missing on Saturday night, but has not been in contact with the police since. Concerned that he's attempting to flee to his native Canada, the Buena Park Police Department has issued an alert to the public, asking for information on the whereabouts of Jenkins, including a description of his car, and license plate. (Jenkins' publicist released a statement to TMZ, saying that he is speaking to his attorney, and plans on meeting with authorities "in the near future.")

Jenkins is a contestant on the VH1 dating show Megan Wants a Millionaire, in which men with a net worth of $1 million or more compete for the love of professional reality show contestant (and Sharon Osbourne victim) Megan Hauserman. (Jenkins was billed as a real estate investor worth $2.5 million.) The third episode, which aired this past Sunday, featured Jenkins' solo date with Hauserman (video to come). Rumor has it that Jenkins was a finalist on the show—which wrapped taping this past winter—but did not win. In a phone interview with TMZ, Hauserman said that, shortly after he was eliminated, Jenkins went to Las Vegas, met Fiore in a club, and married her two days later.

Today, VH1 yanked all material—posts, photos, and episodes—regarding the show from its site, and removed Megan Wants a Millionaire from the list of programs in its sidebar.

Curiously, all episodes have also been made unavailable on iTunes.

Further complicating matters for the network, TMZ has learned that Jenkins not only competed on the show I Love Money 3—which just wrapped taping last month—but also won the grand prize of $250,000, meaning that he would be on every episode of the season.

Update: VH1 has sent us a statement regarding Ryan Jenkins and Megan Wants a Millionaire.

Ryan Jenkins was a contestant on "Megan Wants A Millionaire," an outside production, produced and owned by 51 Minds, that is licensed to VH1. The show completed production at the end of March. Given the unfortunate circumstances, VH1 has postponed any future airings. This is a tragic situation and our thoughts go out to the victim's family.

Person Of Interest In Model Murder Married Victim [TMZ]
VH1 Reality Show Contestant Sought After Model's Body Found In Suitcase [ABC News]
Murdered Model's Husband Brags About $$$ [TMZ]

By being a bitch, in the grand tradition of other awesome bitches like Tina Fey and Hillary Clinton. Zalaznick gets things done, and she doesn't mince words. “Most people who are in a position like that will relentlessly hype what they do and tell you how amazing everything is,” former Vh1 executive Michael Hirschorn tells the Times. “With Lauren, there’s kind of a refreshing jolt of self-criticism…You sort of get the sense that she’s part of the game but not fully submerged in it.”

Even more telling is this anecdote from her Vh1 days:

In 2000, when Zalaznick was still working at VH1, she and [coworkers] Fenton Bailey and Randy Barbato had a public contretemps that many thought would sever their collaboration. Barbato accidentally sent Zalaznick an e-mail message that he intended for Bailey. In the e-mail, he complained that Zalaznick was trying to get rid of their writers’ credits and suggested she was controlling and overcritical of him. Most infamous, he referred to her using a crude epithet, probably the crudest one reserved for women…Zalaznick’s response was telling. She neither laughed it off nor fired anyone. Instead, a few weeks later, she wrote an essay about the experience and published it on a literary Web site called Open Letters. The essay is a thoughtful, brutally honest meditation on the expectations of a woman in power. “I’m probably regarded as being tough, fairly hardhearted, outspoken,” she wrote. “I am occasionally criticized for digging in and being less accommodating to other people’s ideas and criticisms than I ‘should be.’ But this is a weird sort of (double) standard to be held to, especially in a ‘creative’ job where passions are usually what get ideas heard.”

She continues to work with Bailey and Barbato to this day. Not only did she not let that incident bring her down, she was able to get past it and move forward to greater success. However, sometimes Zalaznick's honesty and drive causes her to be, well, really bitchy. During a breakfast meeting, one of Zalaznick's underlings, Andy Cohen, referenced a workout mix he made called Fit-n-40. He later claimed, "I was being ironic!" But during that meeting after Cohen made a few other suggestions Zalaznick deemed lame, Lauren told him bluntly, "Just so you know, you have become that person who thinks he knows what is going on in the universe, but you really don’t. You’re really out of it. You don’t have the same reference points as anyone."

But back to those new Bravo shows. Zalaznick prides herself on being an arbiter of cool, an arbiter of the current and aspirational tastes of a certain group of people, and I fear with these new shows, she might have missed the boat. She claims that her network, which glorifies outrageous extravagance with The Rachel Zoe Project and The Real Housewives franchise, will thrive through this recession even though they continue to produce programs about the uber wealthy. Though the money is the backdrop, Zalaznick reasons, people watch the shows because “They’re about extreme personalities. Our stories are about the meanings of these things, and their stories and their struggles of how you get it."

What Zalaznick misses is that sometimes the wealth is so over the top wasteful that it obscures these struggles and becomes a turn off. As a 26-year-old educated woman with some disposable income, I am absolutely, smack dab in the middle of Bravo's target audience, and since the stock market Kamakazied, I've been unable to watch many of Bravo's shows. I was a huge fan of the Real Housewives of Orange County and New York, and after 15 minutes of the new Atlanta-based arm of the series, I had to turn it off because their wastefulness appalled me. What I found amusing a year ago is no longer so laughable. It makes me wonder if Bravo's wealth-based programming has jumped the Louis Vuitton-monogrammed polo pony.

The Affluencer [NYT Magazine]
Bravo Sews Up Projects [Variety]

Earlier: Tina Fey On SNL: Bitch Is The New Black

• More rumored changes for The Greatest Show On Earth, Project Runway: Season 6 of the show, the first to be broadcast on Lifetime, may feature "More Than A Pretty Face" magazine Marie Claire in lieu of Elle as the affiliated fashion magazine sponsor. [WWD, 1st item]
  
• Whoah: Are New York Times fashion critic Cathy Horyn and Skeletor/stylist Rachel Zoe more similar than we could have ever imagined? Possibly, if it's true that Cathy Horyn was also mysteriously not invited to the dinner and dancing portion of tonight's Costume Institute festivities. [Fashion Week Daily]
  
• And what does legendary costume designer Bob Mackie not like about the fashion industry? "Doing a fashion show that's on for 20 minutes and then it's over and everybody runs to the next one. Nobody sings, nobody dances, nobody tells jokes. I found it quite unsatisfying." I second that emotion. [WWD, sub req'd]

• It's so hard to be Gossip Girl's Penn Badgley: "I wear a lot of Burberry at events and the brand's been really supportive of me since the beginning. On the show, we wear H&M suits." [Fashion Week Daily]
• Sex and the City costume designer/fun drunk lesbian Pat Field: Now designing Diet Coke bottles. [FabSugar]
• More pearls of wisdom from Tim Gunn: "Always keep your tux jacket closed in photos." [Page Six]
• Starring in the latest Gap ads are actors Ginnifer Goodwin, Liv Tyler, Hugh Dancy, Fabcon Clemence Poesy, Catalina Moreno, Edgar Ramirez, photographers Scott Schuman (The Sartorialist) and Ryan McGinley, and also Marchesa designer Georgina Chapman, model Chanel Iman, Visioniare's Cecilia Dean, and Princess Coldstare herself, Leigh Lezark. [FabSugar]
• Leona Lewis: The latest celeb to believe she can be a fashion designer. A vegan fashion designer, that is. Watch your back, Portman and McCartney. [Fashionista]
• Lord & Taylor is launching a new "reality" advertising campaign, with TV and radio spots featuring real customers "ambushed' in their stores by "celebrity stylist" Robert Verdi and quizzed on their shopping experiences. Oh Lord. [WWD, sub req'd]
• WWD asks: "Tax Rebate Checks: Will They Spend Or Will They Save?" [WWD, sub req'd]
• More stars coming to tonight's Vogue and Armani-sponsored Costume Institute gala: Kate Bosworth, Thandie Newton, Audrey Tatou, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Jourdan Dunn, Elettra Rossellini Wiedemann, and Roberto Bolle will all be there. In other words: Lots of good photos for us to dish on tomorrow. [WWD, 1st item]
• Also: Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen, Gisele Bündchen and Tom Brady, Scarlett Johansson, Iman and David Bowie, Sofia Coppola, Karen Elson and Helena Christensen. [Vogue UK]
• Mary Alice Stephenson (formerly the fashion director at Harper's Bazaar and the co-host of America's Most Smartest Model on Vh1) is shooting a special for E! on tonight's festivities, set to air May 8th for the viewing pleasure of us plebs. [Fashion Week Daily]
• Elle editors might have put Kelly Clarkson on the cover of the mag, but that doesn't mean they think she's very fashionable. [Page Six]
• Marc Jacobs: Now in Moscow. [WWD, sub req'd]
• Former model Josie Maran may have fake breasts tits. [Awful Plastic Surgery]
• The fashion on Gossip Girl? Kinda crazy. But that's why we love it so. [EW]
• The rock stars today? The just don't dress like they used to. [LATimes]

Surprisingly, "Celebrity Rehab" — in which everyone from aging actors Jeff Conaway and Daniel Baldwin and "American Idol" finalist Jessica Sierra talks out a personal struggle with substance abuse — is compelling and thoughtful. That's right: The words "VH1" and "thoughtful" made it into the same sentence...."Celebrity Rehab's" class and appeal can be credited to host Drew Pinsky, or "Dr. Drew," as he's known on his syndicated radio show, "Loveline"....He's honestly trying to improve these people's lives....It might be celebrity voyeurism that brings you to this series, but it's the genuine drama and authenticity of the subjects that will keep you watching.

It's a searing, unflattering but still celebratory look at eight worst-case-scenario addicts...Needless to say it is habit-forming....The series exposes all the horrors of addiction, but lightens them with the familiar voyeuristic elements of "The Surreal Life" and other soft-core scorn: silly celebrity tantrums, kooky mishaps and bosomy women in skimpy halter tops bonding and confronting one another. The show offers desperate people a last chance to detox, but it's also a last call for show business has-beens who crave one more crack at fame and will allow cameras into their treatment center bathrooms and therapy sessions for the opportunity.

Riveting as a car wreck, "Celebrity Rehab" is the logical extension of VH1's "surreality" brand — an assembly of TV-created celebrities willing to be debased under the patina of entertainment. Educational only in its unflinching images of drug withdrawal (there's vomiting aplenty), the show proves as pathetic as it is difficult to turn off, its celebrities leveraging their private suffering as a lifeline to public exposure. VH1 may have another success here, but let's not kid ourselves: If this works, the channel has simply demonstrated it's possible to have your cake and snort it, too....Pinsky informs his charges, "Our job is to make you better," [but] he's only telling half the story: Springing for the 21-day treatment program hardly amounts to an altruistic gesture given that the talent provides VH1 with a voyeuristic sideshow act slated for an eight-week run.

Overall, this is an incredibly honest series about the nature of addiction and the nearly superhuman effort required to overcome it. After previewing the first two episodes, I was struck by the candor of Dr. Drew Pinsky as well as the nine celebs who agreed to take part in the 21-day program....These are people who are us[ed] to having their own way and who can't envision life without drugs or booze. Seeing them try to break their dependency is not pretty. In fact, it's downright painful to see them stripped of their glamor, shaking, crying, barfing and struggling to escape from their self-imposed mental fog. It is an unforgettable wake-up call, far more effective than a thousand "Just say no" campaigns.

It might be easy to mock these C- and D-listers, but Dr. Drew never gives in to the urge. The dispassion of his clinical diagnoses is strangely comforting, and at odds with the flamboyance of his patients....Much of the show focuses on group and one-on-one sessions that are less about physical health than emotional. This is where the celebrity portion of the show begins to melt away...Like many, these people are the products of complicated situations. And presumably, if they could afford expensive treatment of this sort, they wouldn't agree to have it filmed. That they, at least for a time, rose to fame and wealth means little. In the end: Celebrities, they're just like us.

Celebrity Rehab With Dr. Drew [VH1]

Yes! Bret Michaels continues to rock our world. The new season premieres Sunday, January 13.

[Image via VH1]

Rock Of Love [VH1]

• We find it hard to believe that Angelina Jolie is in any way threatened by her man Brad's ex, but a source tells 'Page Six' that that's precisely the case, making Angelina, sadly, a little more like us mere mortals. [PageSix]
  
• Christina Aguilera is expecting a baby. Think she'll wear her
  full-on face paint to the birthing room? [PageSix]
  
• Madonna has finally gotten the message: No one wants to watch her in
  movies. Who says people don't get wiser with age? [NYPost, 6th item]
  
• Paris Hilton once said she's only had sex with two people. And apparently Jack Osbourne was one of them. [TheSun]
  
• Oh wait, Age of Love star / tennis pro Mark Philippoussis has had sex with Paris too! [SkyNews]
  
• Nicole Richie has won a 2-week postponement for her trial on drunk
  driving charges, probably in the hopes that her baby bump/distended belly is
  clearly visible to a sympathetic judge. [Reuters]

• How best to declare budding affection for Uma Thurman? By stroking her hair in public, of course. [Gatecrasher]
• Peter Cook and Christie Brinley continue to hash it out regarding custody of their children. [Rush & Molloy]
• Liv Tyler wants plastic surgery, and fast, because having a baby made her body all fat and ugly and shit, yo! They so did not mention that in Lamaze class! [People]
• Speaking of, Drea de Matteo is already bitching about how fat she feels while pregnant. [People]
• Scott Baio to star in dating reality show, a la The Flavor of Love, on VH1. Ew. [TMZ]
• Oh Isaiah Washington! Stop! Stop! You are NOT Malcolm X! [SFGate]
• Ellen Barkin? Pot calling kettle black. [DailyMir ror]