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New York, 12:26 AM
Sat Nov 28
29 posts in the last 24 hours

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  • posts about #vermontcountrystore more →

    No Sex Please, We're Old (And From Vermont)

    Vermont Country Whore

    The Vermont Country Store: For Old Alcoholics & The Kids Who Enable Them
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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of Sputnik_Sweetheart Sputnik_Sweetheart
    02/16/09

    In reply to No Sex Please, We're Old (And From Vermont)
    Slightly off-topic, but doesn't Vermont have really lax nudity laws? I remember reading somewhere that due to some loophole in VT law that a whole bunch of teenagers started biking and hoola-hooping naked in the streets and public parks during a heat wave. Or did I just dream it?
     Reply
    Sputnik_Sweetheart was starred Sputnik_Sweetheart was unstarred
    Image of DontFearTheReefer DontFearTheReefer
    02/16/09

    In reply to No Sex Please, We're Old (And From Vermont)
    ok people, maybe someone can help me out with this. i used to read my grandma's weird catalogs like harriet stevens (or whatever it's called) and this one. one of them was selling some kind of archaic sex toy - i remember something about it being designed by a swiss doctor? the reason i am trying to recall it is because it was probably the scariest sex toy i've ever seen; it was made of metal and looked like a penis cage. i think it had different keys that you inserted into the top of the apparatus and turned to get different vibrating sensation. anyone have any idea what i'm talking about?
     Reply
    DontFearTheReefer was starred DontFearTheReefer was unstarred
    Image of ritualtheory ritualtheory
    02/16/09

    @DontFearTheReefer: Jesus! That sounds like something out of "Dead Ringers"!

    It wasn't the Lillian Vernon catalog, was it? They're hilarious, but more on the order of personalized leather-bound lighters, not iron dildos.
     Reply
    ritualtheory was starred ritualtheory was unstarred
    Image of tscheese tscheese
    02/16/09

    In reply to No Sex Please, We're Old (And From Vermont)
    Oh, I just found something I would totally wear:


    Some kind of dull purple dress.


    I want to wear it with black legings or tights underneath, and Dr. Martens, and maybe a black knit tam o' shanter. I would rock the HELL out of that.

     Reply
    tscheese was starred tscheese was unstarred
    Image of boxspelunker boxspelunker
    02/16/09

    @tscheese: You sound extra stylish, and you know what your description reminds me of? Doug Funnie's older sister. Judy? I don't remember her name, but I think that is what she wore, and I wanted to be her.
     Reply
    boxspelunker was starred boxspelunker was unstarred
    Image of elitza owns the last Enzo shirt elitza owns the last Enzo shirt
    02/17/09

    @tscheese: I kind of want this one.


    Oddly, I think it would look super cute on my frame with some fun espadrilles.

     Reply
    elitza owns the last Enzo shirt was starred elitza owns the last Enzo shirt was unstarred
    Image of tscheese tscheese
    02/16/09

    In reply to No Sex Please, We're Old (And From Vermont)
    I didn't grow up in Vermont, or even anywhere in the Northeast for that matter, but for some reason my parents ALWAYS had this catalog lying around. I don't remember it ever having sex toys or massagers in it--just cozy robes, socks, old-timey candy/cosmetics, bath products.


    Is it bad that I kind of love some of the apparel selection? It just looks so cozy and roomy. I am secretly like 80 years old.

     Reply
    tscheese was starred tscheese was unstarred
    Image of hellosunshine hellosunshine
    02/16/09

    @tscheese: I concur. My parents get this and we live in TEXAS. Granted, Dadser is from Connecticut, but still. I kind of want all of the cuddly things in here.
     Reply
    hellosunshine was starred hellosunshine was unstarred
    Image of TheFormerJuneBronson TheFormerJuneBronson
    02/16/09

    In reply to No Sex Please, We're Old (And From Vermont)
    I might have known people would freak about the catalogue including these items. After all, a lot of their target audience is probably of the plain-brown-paper generation. But I think it's pretty awesome, and I'm glad they've gone ahead with it. It just kills me that people take the time to complain about this. If you don't like it, don't buy it. It doesn't make the rest of the products less effective.
     Reply
    TheFormerJuneBronson was starred TheFormerJuneBronson was unstarred
    Image of ritualtheory ritualtheory
    02/16/09

    In reply to No Sex Please, We're Old (And From Vermont)
    I'm 100% pro-sex toy, and yet...there's something wrong with me for being more interested in the rum cake, isn't there?
     Reply
    ritualtheory was starred ritualtheory was unstarred
    Image of Gobiasomecoffee Gobiasomecoffee
    02/16/09

    In reply to No Sex Please, We're Old (And From Vermont)
    After reading this, I went to their website and clicked on the link "toys"--but was disappointed. Where are they?
     Reply
    Gobiasomecoffee was starred Gobiasomecoffee was unstarred
    Image of argle-bargle? or fou-ferraw? argle-bargle? or fou-ferraw?
    02/16/09

    @Gobiasomecoffee: in the 'apothecary' section...
     Reply
    argle-bargle? or fou-ferraw? was starred argle-bargle? or fou-ferraw? was unstarred
    Image of Ipomoea Ipomoea
    02/16/09

    @Gobiasomecoffee: Apothecary, then Intimate.
     Reply
    Ipomoea was starred Ipomoea was unstarred
    Image of Lirael Lirael
    02/16/09

    In reply to No Sex Please, We're Old (And From Vermont)
    I have never met anyone who was not uplifted by a massager. Maybe they just haven't found the right one
     Reply
    Lirael was starred Lirael was unstarred
    Image of argle-bargle? or fou-ferraw? argle-bargle? or fou-ferraw?
    02/16/09

    @Lirael: or maybe it needs some new batteries?
     Reply
    argle-bargle? or fou-ferraw? was starred argle-bargle? or fou-ferraw? was unstarred
    Image of chritter is a nocturnal feminist mancatfish chritter is a nocturnal feminist mancatfish
    02/16/09

    In reply to No Sex Please, We're Old (And From Vermont)
    These Vermonters are sex fiends! For heavens sake, they named a ski resort "Sugarbush"!


    They must be stopped!

     Reply
    chritter is a nocturnal feminist mancatfish was starred chritter is a nocturnal feminist mancatfish was unstarred
    Image of million.dollar.mouth. million.dollar.mouth.
    02/16/09

    @chritter: There is also a town called Hardwick.....just swap the w for another d....
     Reply
    million.dollar.mouth. was starred million.dollar.mouth. was unstarred
    Image of chritter is a nocturnal feminist mancatfish chritter is a nocturnal feminist mancatfish
    02/16/09

    @sammyboombaladddy.the.zombie.kitteh: *shudder*


    And don't tell me that all that maple syrup is for pancakes, either. Cause I ain't buying it anymore....

     Reply
    chritter is a nocturnal feminist mancatfish was starred chritter is a nocturnal feminist mancatfish was unstarred
    Image of million.dollar.mouth. million.dollar.mouth.
    02/16/09

    @chritter: nope, maple sugar is a multi-purpose treat :)
     Reply
    million.dollar.mouth. was starred million.dollar.mouth. was unstarred
    Image of hortense hortense
    02/16/09

    In reply to No Sex Please, We're Old (And From Vermont)
    Are those Pop-Tarts on the cover?
     Reply
    hortense was starred hortense was unstarred
    Image of Sanfo Sanfo
    02/16/09

    @hortense: Are you craving more since yesterday's "What are you wearing?" post? 'Cuz, uh, if you're not, you should be.
     Reply
    Sanfo was starred Sanfo was unstarred
    Image of argle-bargle? or fou-ferraw? argle-bargle? or fou-ferraw?
    02/16/09

    @hortense: i was wondering the same thing!


    and now i'm hungry. for maple/brown sugar pop tarts.

     Reply
    argle-bargle? or fou-ferraw? was starred argle-bargle? or fou-ferraw? was unstarred
    Image of TheFormerJuneBronson TheFormerJuneBronson
    02/16/09

    @hortense: I think they're the Garibaldi Raisin Biscuits. I've never eaten them, but I've seen them in the catalogue many times.
     Reply
    TheFormerJuneBronson was starred TheFormerJuneBronson was unstarred
    Image of ItchykooParker ItchykooParker
    02/16/09

    @TheFormerJuneBronson: Those are absolutely delicious. I am NOT kidding.
     Reply
    ItchykooParker was starred ItchykooParker was unstarred
    Image of argle-bargle? or fou-ferraw? argle-bargle? or fou-ferraw?
    02/16/09

    @TheFormerJuneBronson: a raisin biscuit sounds pretty good too... i think i just need to eat something.
     Reply
    argle-bargle? or fou-ferraw? was starred argle-bargle? or fou-ferraw? was unstarred
    Image of TheFormerJuneBronson TheFormerJuneBronson
    02/16/09

    @ItchykooParker: I'll have to pick some up the next time we go! We usually go every Christmas, but were foiled by the weather this year.
     Reply
    TheFormerJuneBronson was starred TheFormerJuneBronson was unstarred
    Image of Crackers In Bed Crackers In Bed
    02/16/09

    In reply to No Sex Please, We're Old (And From Vermont)
    oh dear god, this just brought back a suppressed childhood memory of the day i found that strange, buzzing cylindrical object in my mother's bedside drawer...
     Reply
    Crackers In Bed was starred Crackers In Bed was unstarred
    Image of million.dollar.mouth. million.dollar.mouth.
    02/16/09

    In reply to No Sex Please, We're Old (And From Vermont)
    I have never been prouder to be a Vermonter.
     Reply
    million.dollar.mouth. was starred million.dollar.mouth. was unstarred
    Image of rocknrollunicorn rocknrollunicorn
    02/16/09

    In reply to No Sex Please, We're Old (And From Vermont)
    Yeah, the youth of America spends a lot of time looking for uplifting items in the Vermont Country Store catalog. Now their eyes are all sullied and stuff. For shame, VCS!
     Reply
    rocknrollunicorn was starred rocknrollunicorn was unstarred
    Image of hortense hortense
    02/16/09

    In reply to No Sex Please, We're Old (And From Vermont)
    Hey now- the people who order from this catalog are usually not from VT. My guess is that the letter writers are retirees in Florida who buy the stupid shit from this catalog to relive their New England upbringing.
     Reply
    hortense was starred hortense was unstarred
    Image of million.dollar.mouth. million.dollar.mouth.
    02/16/09

    @hortense: Ha! exactly....I am a born and raised Vermonter, and I have never heard of this calalog
     Reply
    million.dollar.mouth. was starred million.dollar.mouth. was unstarred
    Image of Sanfo Sanfo
    02/16/09

    In reply to No Sex Please, We're Old (And From Vermont)
    This is the direct link to the "proper" area of the store:

    [www.vermontcountrystore.com]
     Reply
    Sanfo was starred Sanfo was unstarred
    Image of elitza owns the last Enzo shirt elitza owns the last Enzo shirt
    02/16/09

    @Clever Rodphallus (Sanford) with apologies to zombies.: WOW. Some of those are intense... Herpes spray????? Hair dye? yeesh.


    that being said, some of the vibes look super fun.

     Reply
    elitza owns the last Enzo shirt was starred elitza owns the last Enzo shirt was unstarred
    Image of Sanfo Sanfo
    02/16/09

    @elitza: HERPES SPRAY!! I clicked on the green dildo thing, and the two products it said complimented the decision were lipstick and bath salts.


    Accuracy. They has it.

     Reply
    Sanfo was starred Sanfo was unstarred
    Image of rocknrollunicorn rocknrollunicorn
    02/16/09

    @Clever Rodphallus (Sanford) with apologies to zombies.: Holy crap, there is a gel that claims to enlarge your Gspot to increase pleasure. It is called "Ooooh that's it!"


    I am not making this up. Additionally, it's on sale for $10 so you might want to get in on this (lordy knows I do).

     Reply
    rocknrollunicorn was starred rocknrollunicorn was unstarred
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