• No one saw this coming: Jon Gosselin dumped Hailey Glassman on the advice of his spiritual advisor, Rabbi Shmuley Boteach. "They're taking a break," said an insider, "[Jon] decided he needed to spend some time on his own." [Extra]

• Jon Gosselin is trying to connect with his "deeper, more spiritual, more altruistic self" through regular study sessions with Rabbi Shmuley Boteach, who is famous for serving as Michael Jackson's spiritual advisor. Jon said he plans to publicly apologize "in a sacred space to those whom I have hurt" on Sunday at Manhattan's West Side Synagogue. [People]
• Jon Gosselin sent a statement to the producers of Jon - Kate = Jon + Octomom saying that while he "appreciates the consideration and the potential revenues that it offers, after reviewing with both the management team and his spiritual advisors Jon has decided it is not in his best interest to pursue a show of this nature." [TMZ]
• Though Jon Gosselin claims he didn't hear about the show until it was reported in the media, emails between Jon and the producers have surfaced that detail the plot of the show, Hailey Glassman's role, and how much he would be paid. The producers write: "Pretty easy work for a million dollars." [Radar Online]
• The 53-year-old man who said Miley Cyrus sends him secret messages through his TV and was arrested for stalking her will be set free after pleading guilty to two misdemeanors. He has been sentenced to two years probation and must undergo a mental health evaluation. [TMZ]
• Miley Cyrus says of shooting her cameo in Sex and the City 2: Electric Boogaloo, "Literally, I shot for like an hour and a half, and I was done... it was a total dream come true." [People]
• A man accused of stalking Ryan Seacrest has been arrested inside the E! building. [TMZ]
• Seacrest's stalker, Chidi Uzomah, was sentenced to 3 years probation and ordered to stay away from Seacrest after attacking his security guard last month. He had a knife on him today. [TMZ]
• Chidi Uzomah showed up at the KIIS FM radio studio looking for Ryan Seacrest earlier this month and Ryan's people asked the police to arrest him for a parole violation. [TMZ]
• An Ohio prosecutor has dropped the charges against one of the three men accused of spying on Sarah Jessica Parker's surrogate because he wants him to testify against the other two. [AP]
• Nicole Richie is seeking a restraining order against the paparazzi who hit her car. [TMZ]
• Paris Hilton's neighbors called the police because she was throwing an incredibly loud party at 4 am, but by the time the police got there at 5 am it was totally quiet. [TMZ]
• Lindsay Lohan's bodyguard was detained yesterday because he tried to cross a police barricade. [TMZ]
• Matthew Morrison of Glee has "almost finalized" a record deal. "It's going to be different. I would consider it a classier Justin Timberlake album," he said. "It's going to be me and a big orchestra, but also with beats." [Access Hollywood]
• Cindy Crawford will guest judge the next episode of Project Runway. [People]
• Eddie Murphy will appear on the season finale of ANTM but he won't be a judge. He'll been supporting his daughter Bria Murphy, who will appear on the show. [E!]
• Vanessa Paradis, Johnny Depp's girlfriend, pushed a photograph on the way out of a Betsey Johnson store and yelled, "Are you mad?!" [ONTD]
• It was revealed on last night's RHOA reunion special that NeNe and Kim's feud is over. [People]
• A source says the rumor that Pamela Anderson is pregnant again are not true. The source says: "She's not pregnant... just happy. She doesn't have to say anything because they (rumours) are not true. She actually gets upset because her kids go to school. Of course, she cares. She's a human being. We're all human." [Daily Express]
• Earlier this week a stripper said she had a fling with Josh Duhamel after he married Fergie. Today a woman in the Air Force called in to a radio show and claimed that he slept with a few other women in the Air Force while he was filming Transformers 2. [Perez Hilton]
• A lady who has intimate knowledge of A-Rod's bedroom reveals "He was so vain. He had not one, but two painted portraits of himself as a centaur. You know, the half man, half horse figure? ... It was ridiculous." [Us]
• The preliminary hearing in the Anna Nicole Smith drug case has concluded and a judge decided there was enough evidence for Howard K. Stern, Dr. Sandeep Kapoor, and Dr. Khristine Eroshevich to stand trial. [TMZ]
• FYI, Dr. Mehmet's Oz's drink is tequila straight. [N.Y. Magazine]
• At the link Jimmy Fallon does another spoof of Robert Pattinson's sulking. [People]
• Steven Soderbergh has written a play about the Caylee Anthony case called Tot Mom that will be staged in Australia in December. [CBS News]
• For his Showtime documentary Poliwood director Barry Levinson followed Anne Hathaway, Susan Sarandon and other politically-active members of the Creative Coalition as they navigated the 2008 political conventions. He says, "I was fascinated at the level of criticism for those celebrities who have some genuine interest in the political process. You try to navigate through this media circus and hopefully don't end up the clown." [W]
• Tom Hanks says he loves Beyonce's "Single Ladies" because that' what he told his wife Rita Wilson when they first met: "I'm gon' put a ring on that finger. I'm gon' take that thing home." [AP]
• Mario Lopez says the persistent rumor that he and Eva Longoria once dated isn't true. "We get asked that a lot but I've known her for a long time and it would seem incestuous," he said. "We're both the same culture, same age, our families both know each other, so we go back. It would be weird. It would never happen." [Daily Express]
• Jude Law's rep says he and Sienna Miller aren't dating. "Jude and Sienna are just friends and are seeing each other socially occasionally as they are both on Broadway, performing just one block apart." [People]
• Michael Buble says he's happy for ex-girlfriend Emily Blunt and her fiance John Krasinski. "We talked and I congratulated her. Emily is amazing, so this guy also has to be," said Buble. [Daily Express]
• "I never expected to make a living at this when I was growing up. My whole career is pretty much by accident." — Weird Al Yankovic [CNN]
• Chaz Bono says that his girlfriend of four years, Jennifer Ella, stood by him through his recent gender reassignment surgery. "She's been amazing," he said, "I feel really grateful to be going through this with a partner." He adds: "Our relationship always modeled a heterosexual relationship, emotionally and intellectually. So now it does physically as well." [People]
• As just about every geeky guy has done at some point, David Beckham is growing a beard to try to look more like Wolverine. He says, "Halloween is coming up and I was thinking of Wolverine from X-Men. It's not some play-off ritual. I'm just lazy and can't be bothered to shave. And everybody keeps telling me to cut it and I'm stubborn." [Ok]
• Victoria Beckham says her solo singing career was a mistake. "People never believed the solo singing career, and it wasn't the real me - I was a little bit lost at the time. I don't mind making mistakes. I just can't live with anyone else's mistakes." [The Mirror]
• On Oprah today Lisa Niemi, Patrick Swayze's wife of 34 years said, "I feel him here. I feel like he hasn't left. I can feel every contour of his hand in mine." [People]

• Jean-Paul Gaultier is doing a collaboration with Target that will hit stores next spring; stay tuned for pricing information and images as they inevitably leak. Please let there be lingerie-as-outerwear! [WWD]
• Agyness Deyn might star in a short film. [P6]

• Mad Men costume designer Janie Bryant says she intends to add women's wear, like evening gowns and office wear, to the clothing line inspired by the show. The first items, men's suits, go on sale at Brooks Brothers tomorrow. For now, of course, you can always dress like Joan Holloway by cruising the vintage stores. [Independent]
• Oh, someone at Agent Provocateur has a sense of humor that matches our own. Penis! Har de har, har. [Things Doanie Likes]
• The reason the Jimmy Choo for H&M collection tops out at $299, for a pair of thigh-high boots? The pieces are all real leather, says Tamara Mellon. Which begs the question, why does it cost so much, again? There's no law that says real leather has to cost $300. [The Cut]
• 17-year-old Kalief Rollins of Carson, California, started a t-shirt line called Phree Kountry. It sells shirts with messages like "Caution: Educated African American Male," and this week, his business plan was announced as the winner of the National Young Entrepreneur Competition. In addition to $10,000, Rollins got to meet the president, who kept one of the "Caution" shirts. Rollins needs to do two things: make those tees for women, and get a website. Hello! [CBS]
• Hassan bin Ali al-Nuaimi, the angel investor who is ready to acquire the bankrupt house of Christian Lacroix, says if his bid is successful, he will investigate licensing the Lacroix name to private jets, exclusive hotels, and yachts. [Reuters]
• Naeem Khan's Home Shopping Network line will be produced in sizes 0-24 and cost up to $450. [Style.com]
• Ali Wise, the now-ex Dolce & Gabbana publicist accused of hacking into an ex-boyfriend's new flame's voicemail, faces additional charges apparently related to a total of four victims. The Manhattan District Attorney added four counts each of computer trespass, eavesdropping, computer tampering in the fourth degree and aggravated harassment in the second degree, and one count of stalking in the fourth degree. These are all misdemeanors; Wise already faced two felony charges of computer trespass and eavesdropping. The full complaint alleges that Wise used a service called SpoofCard to gain access to two other people's voicemails more than 1,000 times. [WWD]
• From October 20, in France, you will be able to buy a 186-page "biography" of Chanel No. 5. Perfect for that chic woman you know who has...everything. [WWD]
• Jill Biden likes to wear miniskirts sometimes. [HuffPo]
• The Pierre Hardy for the Gap collaboration, which includes some high heeled boots that would be gorgeous if they didn't cost close to $200, has been delayed yet again. Although the boots were supposed to hit stores in September, Gap has been pushing back their delivery. Today was supposed to be Boot Day, but Racked is reporting that none of the Manhattan stores have any. What gives? [Racked]
• Pearl Lowe has designed a line for the British retailer Peacocks. Her daughter, Daisy Lowe, is modeling it. How sweet. [Telegraph]
  
• Vanessa Williams' PR rep must have some awesome dirt to be able to engineer coverage like this: a news item about the actress receiving a meaningless award for being "fearless" praises her "courage and humility," calls her an "entertainment denizen," and reports as objective fact her "fearless conviction." Williams herself accords that to "a thrill-seeking gene. The people that I come from are outspoken and driven and not afraid to take chances." Either really good dirt, or someone at Women's Wear Daily just loves Ugly Betty. [WWD]
• Tom Ford sure does say the darndest things. The Guardian collects his most enduring quotes, including "Richard [Buckley, his partner] hardly ever has anything nice to say about my work. It's my mother all over again." [Guardian]
• Vanessa Paradis is set to be the face of Chanel's Rouge Coco lipsticks next year. [Independent]
• Coach's lower-priced handbag line, Poppy, introduced this summer, has helped raise revenues at the company even as profits continued to fall slightly. First-quarter profits were down 3% on last year, to $140.8 million, but sales rose 8% in North America. [NYTimes]
• Louis Vuitton Moët Hennessyannounced a company-wide 0.6% decline in third quarter. [WSJ]

• Kate Moss and her boyfriend, Jamie Hince, have been invited to spend Christmas on Johnny Depp's private island with Depp and his wife, Vanessa Paradis. Celebrities! They're just like us...if we had an ex-boyfriend with a private island. [TheSun]

• Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer are reportedly together again, for the 80th time. [TheSun]
• The pair were seen eating dinner together with Courteney Cox Arquette and her husband, David, and Aniston was "was on his arm and they were very lovey." [TheSun]
• Meanwhile, Aniston and her father, John Aniston have come together to narrate a children's book for charity; $2 from each book sold will be given to St. Jude's Children's Research Hospital. [JustJared]
• Blake Lively is allegedly a very big fan of Victoria Beckham and recently tried to convince Beckham to guest star on Gossip Girl, taking her case to the producers of the show. "Victoria isn't an actress and wanted her role to be very tongue-in-cheek," says a source, "And an idea for her to play Ed Westwick's long-lost mother was quickly vetoed. Victoria joked that she'd rather play his ex-love interest!" [ShowbizSpy]
• 3,000 people came out to say farewell to Boyzone star Stephen Gately this morning at his funeral; Gately passed away at the age of 33 last week. [Reuters]
• Pete Wentz, who says he wants a "soccer team" of kids, also says that having a son made him realize how much his own father did for him: "It makes me realize all of the little things that my dad sacrificed when he had me. It's sad it took 30 years but I totally realize it now." [People]
• An interesting question for your Saturday morning: "Is Kevin Costner Germany's new David Hasselhoff?" [People]
• Larry Birkhead claims that Anna Nicole Smith took methadone while pregnant with their daughter, Dannielynn, as she feared withdrawal would cause her to lose the baby. [NYDN]
• Girls Gone Wild founder Joe Francis was caught on tape screaming a homophobic slur at a doorman last night after being denied entrance a club. [TMZ]
• TLC reportedly knows just how much money Jon Gosselin has been making from his interviews and promotional appearances, and, according to RadarOnline, "the network wants all that money plus damages in a court battle that has the strong possibility of leaving Jon flat broke." [RadarOnline]
• Michael Crichton's wife and daughter are currently fighting over the late author's estate, as Crichton's daughter wants his wife (her step-mother) removed as trustee of Crichton's estate. [UPI]
• Levi Johnston is preparing for his upcoming Playgirl shoot by eating tons of lean protein, including moose meat, according to his trainer: "Moose meat is very good for you, high in protein and very lean." [People]
• Two Ohio police chiefs accused of breaking in to the home of Sarah Jessica Parker's surrogate in order to collect information on Parker and her husband, Matthew Broderick, to sell to the tabloids, face between 14-21 years of jail if convicted. [E!]
• Ryan Reynolds is currently working on a film "described as a dude-in-drag romantic comedy, with Reynolds playing a jilted lover who must disguise himself as a woman and befriend his ex in order to win her back." [Variety]
• "I've found that people are cool if you don't treat them like jerks."-Penn Badgely [NYTimes]
• Andrew Keegan's ex-girlfriend claims she isn't surprised that a judge refused to grant her a permanent restraining order against Keegan, whom she's accused of abusing her in the past: "
  "I'm fine. I guess deep down inside, I knew I had a slim chance in winning, considering I didn't hire an expensive lawyer to bail me out. In fact, I went alone as a strong woman who was standing up to someone who hurt her." [TMZ]
• "What they really want from us is just to open the movie and then get lost after introducing a new generation of ghostbusters, who can start the franchise all over again. I've heard the script idea, and part of it is good but, ye know, it's going to be tough to start again." -Bill Murray on Ghostbusters III [TimesOnline]
• Cindy Crawford says she gets her famous mole checked often, as she fears it might become cancerous. [DailyMail]
• Curious about the type of condoms Jamie Kennedy uses? Well, wonder no more, I guess. [TMZ]
• Khloe Kardashian says no matter what she does, bloggers and commenters will criticize her body: "Well, I am always fat no matter how much weight I lose. It's like I can never have a good body. But I have a really strong sense of self-esteem. It kind of frustrates me because I do work really hard. I eat really well and I try to look the best I can." [ShowbizSpy]
• Debbie Rowe has filed a $490,000 lawsuit against Rebecca White, who claimed that she had an email from Rowe stating that Rowe didn't want custody of her children with Michael Jackson. [TMZ]
• "I want to hate Megan Fox more than anything. We all do. But I read a bunch of her quotes, and she's witty and smart and carefree. I thought, ‘This is the kind of girl I'd love to be friends with."-Kristen Bell [ShowbizSpy]

• Katie Holmes made the cover of AnOther Magazine — along with Vanessa Paradis, Kate Moss, and Natalie Portman. [DesignScene]
• Apparently, we're supposed to support Gwyneth Paltrow's absurdly high-priced clothing line for Zoetee's because the profits are for charity. [People]

• Those pictures starring a Victoria Beckham lookalike, wearing Beckham's dresses, which the Daily Mail mistook for a lookbook from the line yesterday, are actually from an online-only editorial in V, and therefore not associated with Posh at all. Model Heidi Mount was cast by the magazine to impersonate La Beckham, and she does a mighty good job. [V]
• But the leaked images of Scarlett Johanson from earlier this week are indeed campaign shots for Dolce & Gabbana's new scent, Rose The One. [People]
• Marc Jacobs will have an after-party following his fashion show this season! And not just any party: He's doing it with Lady Gaga. [The Cut]
• Marc Jacobs said Anna Wintour is "Very maternal and caring," and then added the all-important follow-up, "to the people she cares about." [People]
• Because of Wintour's famed dislike of tardiness, all the bold-faced names at the September Issue premiere were remarkably prompt to arrive. Except for P. Diddy, who got to the red carpet, realized he was the only one there, and sprinted for the doors. Anna Wintour can make P. Diddy run. [NYObs]
• Maggie Gyllenhaal may be presenting Dries Van Noten with his award at the Couture Council of the Museum at FIT luncheon, which kicks off New York Fashion Week. Gyllenhaal has worn the Dutch designer several times in the past. [Stylefile]
• Michael Bay, the director the New Yorker called "stunningly, almost viciously untalented," is doing the Victoria's Secret holiday commercial again this year (he last got the credit in 2002.) And he just uploaded some behind-the-scenes shots of Doutzen, Adriana, et. al., to his website. [MichaelBay]
• Meanwhile, Hayden Christensen is shilling for Lacoste's scent, Challenge. [ONTD]
• We do not look forward to the day when celebrities, after developing exhaustive arrays of perfumes, launch into home fragrances, as Ferragamo is doing. [WWD]
• Christian Audigier says Jon Gosselin and Hailey Glassman, who flew to St. Tropez to holiday with the designer as reality TV star and reality TV star stylist, respectively, were not an item at first. But, "by the time two weeks passed it was a completely new story." Audigier also says that Gosselin "is not the same as he was. He has a more complicated life now." [People]
• Ralph Lauren went to a bar in Williamsburg, the ticking heart of New York hipsterdom, walked around, and left. This is news. [The Cut]
• Kellie Pickler is going to do an event next month for the charity Soles4Soles. [WWD]
• Could Haider Ackerman be in the running to take over Maison Martin Margiela? Margiela himself has been rumored to have stepped back from his namesake label for several seasons now — before the Fall 2009 show, there was a rumor that Margiela had taken on a consulting role, and just a couple months ago he was rumored to have left completely. Ackerman, when asked about the rumors that he might take over the house, said only, "When you meet the person you have admired for so many years, how can you possibly replace him? Sometimes it's better never to meet your heroes." [T via Fashionologie]
• And Jean Paul Gaultier is said to be resigning from Hermès, effective after his Spring/Summer show this October. [FWD]
• Perhaps we should be happy Rachel Zoe is a stylist, because if she hadn't ended up dressing small women in psychedelic tent dresses, she would have been "A psychiatrist. I am endlessly fascinated by people's minds and what makes them tick." [W]
• Electronic Arts is producing a line of video games targeted at 8-12-year-old girls, all of which will feature heavy product placement courtesy of Claire's, the costume jewelry chain. To wit: "My Fashion Mall, available for Nintendo DS, allows players to manage their own mall, taking it 'from drab to fab.' Girls can compete in mini-challenges at Claire's, which is featured in the game, as well as add Claire's charms to their virtual jewelry box." [BrandWeek]
• Christian Siriano is launching a line of makeup with Victoria's Secret, a collaboration that actually makes some sense because Siriano worked as a makeup artist when he first moved to New York. The products all reflect Siriano's Egyptian influence for his Fall 2009 collection, and include lots of bronzers and gold-flecked eye colors, named things like Oasis and, naturally, Gilded Fierce. And there's a kohl eye pencil that Siriano says is "really dirty and downtown — like, I dunno, you're going to go home with someone after you put it on." Or, as Edward Gorey put it, "The Wanton, though she knows its danger / must needs smear Kohl about her eyes / and catch the attention of a stranger / with drawn-out, hoarse, erotic sighs." [The Cut]
• Victoria's Secret just suffered a 27% decline in its second quarterly profit, so the chain is moving its focus to lower-priced items. Perhaps this means no more $80 tee shirt bra? [WSJ]
• Henry Holland loves "Walking. I just spent loads of money on a pair of studded Prada brogues and my justification was that my shoes are my car." We, car-less and broke and shoe-loving, wish we had never heard this justification. [W]
• Gap is apparently launching a pop-up store with the French concept shop Merci. All profits will be donated to charity, and the store will open on September 10 — just in time for fashion week — on the corner of Fifth Avenue and 54th Street. [WWD]
• A tipster claiming to work at Gen Art, the group that gives seed money to fashion designers and film-makers — Zac Posen is among the young talents to have received funds in the past — says the company, which has long been struggling financially, is the victim of its own leaders' mismanagement, and that while the staff experienced multiple rounds of pay cuts and layoffs, the brothers who run the show never even docked their own pay. [Gawker]
• Despite declining sales, cost-cutting at the Gap has meant the retailer saw a slight increase in its earnings for the second quarter, beating analysts' expectations. Sales fell by 7% across all the chains the Gap owns, but profits held virtually steady at $228 million, versus $229 million during the same period last year. [AP]
• Gap is also opening its first Israeli store in the city of Jerusalem on Monday. [UPI]
• Ann Taylor experienced a quarterly loss of $18 million. [TS]
• There is going to be a Twilight range of beauty products. By this point, we're only surprised there isn't one already! [WWD]

The island has six different beaches — named after Depp's partner, Vanessa Paradis, and their children, Lily Rose and Jack, as well as his mentors Hunter S. Thompson and Marlon Brando. There's a "patch of water" called "Heath's Place," after the late actor Heath Ledger. The several small residences on the island are solar-powered, and transportation consists of a fleet of green golf carts. Johnny says the beach named after Thompson is Depp "the most savage and exposed of all the beaches. Gonzo Beach is pure Hunter."

Johnny tells Brinkley:

"I don't think I'd ever seen any place so pure and beautiful. You can feel your pulse rate drop about 20 beats. It's instant freedom. And that rare beast-simplicity-can be had. And a little morsel of anonymity… Whenever I was getting frustrated about being 'novelty boy' and making movies, I told myself, Calm down. I can come down here and disappear. I spent the Christmas season here with Vanessa and the kids. You can feed hot dogs to the nurse sharks in the Exumas - but it's best to not swim when doing it."

When not swimming or feeding sharks, Johnny paints. "When I can focus on something like guitar or painting, I do," he says. "I started painting people I admire, like Kerouac, Bob Dylan, Nelson Algren, Marlon Brando, Patti Smith, my girl, my kids. I painted Hunter a couple of times. Keith Richards. What I love to do is paint people's faces, y'know, their eyes. Because you want to find that emotion, see what's going on behind their eyes."

One thing is for sure: Johnny is convince that island living is best.

Nobody is going to ever ruin the Land and Sea Park. It's like a rare gem, a diamond. I look forward to my kids growing up on the island, spending months out of the year here … learning about sea life and how to protect sea life … and their kids growing up here, and so on…. Theoretically, this place can add years to your life." Then he quotes the old adage: "Money doesn't buy you happiness. But it buys you a big enough yacht to sail right up to it."

Take a Trip to Johnny Depp's Private Island [Vanity Fair]

[Image by Francois-Marie Banier exclusively for Vanity Fair.]

This cover is from Fall 1992. John Corbett was "that guy from Northern Exposure" and Sex And The City had yet to be unleashed on the American public. The woman he's posing with is MTV VJ Duff. It seems he'd love to just tilt his head and knock her right off the cover.

Ladies and gentlemen: Kristy Swanson, star of a little film called Buffy The Vampire Slayer. She's mad for plaid! Fall 1992.

Did women actually wear quilted vests and tapered pants tucked into boots? This woman did. Fall 1992.

Who could possibly look at a jean jacket and think, "what this thing needs is a see-through panel" ? Fall 1992.

Where are these people now? Winter 1993.

The only thing more frightening than her eye makeup is that platformed and chunky-heeled boot. Not that I didn't covet it, at the time. Let's not talk about the hair. Winter 1993.

Please note the frayed pants hem and Colonial Williamsburg shoes. Did people actually get laid in the '90s? Winter 1993.

A threesome you don't want to watch. And where is her hand? Winter 1993.

Her hideous vest was $82, which has got to be almost $200 in 2009 dollars, right? Anyway. If you lean in, you can hear Arrested Development playing in the background. Winter 1993.

Gah. What's funnier — the hats, the hair, or the sucked-in-cheeks this model is throwing at the camera? Winter 1993.

I would like to pretend I didn't wear something like this to see the Chili Peppers and Ice Cube at Lollapalooza but I can't. The shame is crippling. Winter 1993.

Jeremy spoke in class today. Winter 1993.

Would you look at Ms. Tyra Banks? Getting all close and personal with the dude who sang "I Hate Everything About You? Her eyebrows are… severe. Spring 1995.

The spread says "Café Au Lait," but the message? Black coffee is strong. By the by: This model, credited as "Wale," is Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje, also known as Adebisi from Oz or Mr. Eko from Lost. Spring 1995.

No thanks! Spring 1995.

Look closely and you'll see CSI's Gary Dourdan jumbled in this pretty pile-up. Also: Yay, diversity! Spring 1995.

Big toothbrush, little skirt. Are we raving now? Spring 1995.

Oh, dear: The inevitable rollerblading story. "The blading scene is largely about being seen," reads the copy. Spring 1995.

Nuno Bettencourt, on the left, was in Extreme, the band caused "More Than Words" to be on the airwaves. Incessantly. The lady to his right is then-19-year-old Vanessa Paradis, who was releasing an album produced by Lenny Kravitz. Johnny Depp: No where to be found. Winter 1992.

In the interview accompanying these shots of Marky Mark, he uses the word "dope" over and over again. "I think of myself as a very flavorsome rapper. I'm versatile and that's what I think makes my style so dope," he says. "I did a dope rap on voting for MTV. I just started getting hip on voting." Winter 1992.

This actually feels rather current. Could be My Chemical Romance or whatever, no? Winter 1992.

Male supermodel, Marcus Schenkenberg, gives his best "blue steel." Winter 1992.

• Suri Cruise's custom Roger Vivier flats: Cute, or creepy and decadent? "Bruno Frisoni, the creative director of the French luxury label and pal of Tom and Katie, made Suri her very own pair of iconic buckle flats (made famous by Catherine Deneuve in Belle de Jour)." Oh, and if you want your own toddler to look like a Parisian hooker? Sorry, they were a one-off. [People]
• Paris Hilton continues her career as political satirist with some advice for Sarah Palin: "You've got a hot bod; don't keep it to yourself...Why wear a pantsuit when you can wear a swimsuit? Welcome to the Lower 49, girlfriend." Or maybe that wasn't satire. [New York Post]
• Media reports that Gisele sends moola to her family in Brazil so now the fam are at risk for kidnapping. [Daily Express]
• That Van Cleef & Arpels suit against Heidi Klum's jewelry line has been dismissed. [Sassybella]

• Britney might be a surprise performer at this Diesel party in Brooklyn. Screw that! MIA will be there! [Fashionista]
• Coach's Reed Krakoff, who wrote a book about ultimate fighting, trotted out a bunch of (uncomfy) fighters to Barneys for the event. “I thought they’d just roll us in off a bus, and that we would have dinner with a bunch of suits,” said one. “I didn’t expect all this.” [WWD]
• If you don't mind imposing both puns and political endorsements on babies, you'll like this new line of Obama-wear. "Baby Needs a Change," anyone? [Utne]
• I'm guessing at this point most of us don't want to waste a mouse click on Lauren Conrad's holiday collection. [FabSugar]
• Gap and Abercrombie both down; middle-schoolers obviously hit by recession. [WSJ]
• In fact, Wal Mart's about the only one who's up. [WWD]
• Vanessa Paradis: "The red carpet is not something I really know how to work. It intimidates me. I feel very tiny...I don't have famous neighbours and if I did, I'd avoid them. I don't live the jet-set." Guess she prefers to hole up with Depp. [VogueUK]
• The blouse is back, baby. [ElleUK]
• Marc Jacobs “totally channeled" late artist Stephen Sprouse in his new collection. [Fabsugar]

• Addressing the alarming shortage of celebrity fragrances, Halle Berry, who is releasing her own, proclaims: "It’s a real, true expression of who I am — I was involved in all aspects of making it." [WWD]
• Oh, those wags at PETA! In another devastating jab at their fur-sporting nemeses, the animal rights wits have produced "Trollsen Twins" masks for us to wear on Halloween! "To complete the "Hairy Kate" and "Trashley" look, PETA recommends Starbucks, cigarettes and boho chic gear." [MollyGood]
• Hey! Wanna go to the Viktor & Rolf show? It's online! (No, you still can't afford anything.) [NY Mag]
• Kaiser Karl is coming to America! Specifically, Vermont. Quoth Lagerfeld, “I love it. It’s very much Emily Dickinson." [WWD]
• Leighton Meester "does her part to end domestic violence" by walking in a celebrity fashion show. [People]

• Irina Lazareanu, the Barbra of modeling, says she's really retiring this time. [Style.com]
• Yup, Alessandra Facchinetti's out at Valentino. [WWD]
• We're starting to feel bad for Lauren Conrad's clothing line . [Perez Hilton]
• And if LC and Heidi are too high-profile for you, perhaps you want to patronize a smaller designer, why, here's Audrina's denim line! [Perez Hilton]
• Anna Wintour: the Rasputin of the fashion world. [NY Mag]
• The CEO of Coach went all Joyce Carol Oates on us and just wrote a book about wrestling. [MediaBistro]
• Are we the only ones who think of Electra from Gypsy when we hear about all these high-tech "intelligent" clothes? This new jacket has a solar panel. Hey, you gotta have a gimmick! [Reuters]
• Possibly because of her complete blankness, Kate Moss is the most popular artist's muse of our age. [Independent]
• Kate also really likes that solid gold statue of herself. [VogueUK]
• She also doesn't wear underpants. And her hairdresser takes total credit for her style. [GraziaDaily]
• Rich people discover second-hand clothes. [LA Times]
• Uniqlo is up, at least. [WWD]
• New beauty director at Nylon, late of ElleGirl. [Fashionista]
• Vanessa Paradis on Johnny Depp: "Maybe I'm a good girlfriend because I'm his girlfriend. I'm not sure I'd be a good girlfriend to anyone else." Yeah, we're guessing we could go good for Sparrow, too. [ElleUK]

• Well, someone is looking perky at 37. But who? Dodai likes this cover but I'm against stupid masks being used to conceal the mugs of celebrities I haven't seen enough of. I feel like the last I saw Claudia Schiffer was in her exercise video. [Telegraph]
  
• Celeb stylist Phillip Bloch got a little taste of Abu Ghraib when he got thrown out of a Kanye West concert at Madison Square Garden for hanging out with a bunch of teenage girls who were smoking pot. "They never asked for ID, never asked for my name. It was complete brutality," he says. [NY Post]
  
• "Remember, when our customer tightens their belt, it's generally ostrich or alligator." That's Neiman Marcus CEO Burt Tansky, just echoing Thomas Frank's sentiments on the ruins of the "man-made catastrophe that proceeded directly from the deliberate beatdown of organized labor and the wrecking of the liberal state." [Slate]
  
• Making one's rack look and feel respectable is hard enough without forcing bras to perform additional functions like transporting wine and crap, but leave it to the Japanese to invent a solar-powered bra that can charge a cell phone. [Reuters]

• "The Tailor is designed to be a resource for the man who has a keen sense of style and takes pride in his appearance, but doesn't take himself too seriously," said Bluefly Chief Executive Melissa Payner, on their new "store-within-a-store" concept "The Tailor," which she assures visitors will find to be "authoritative, not pretentious." And yes, she is talking about a website. [Crain's]
• What magazine will snag the Project Runway partnership now that the show is moving to Lifetime and ALL OF MEDIA has been upended? Well, Lifetime is co-owned by Hearst, which owns Marie Claire, which just signed ousted ELLE editor and Project Runway judge Nina Garcia, so...I mean, they could also give it to Cosmo... [WWD]

• After much consideration I have decided that I do not care at all what the personal footwear choices of the Sex and the City stars say about their personalities. [LA Times]
  
• Speaking of Sex and the City, Sarah Jessica Parker says that her son only wears his older cousin's hand-me-downs and has never been given new clothes, other than shoes. [US Weekly]
  
• Another day, more people fired from ELLE. This time, on the dot-com side. Maybe Nina will give them jobs over at Marie Claire? [WWD, 1st item]
  
• Rachel Zoe does not want to talk about being disinvited from the Met Costume Institute Gala thankyouverymuch. [US Weekly]
  
• In case you were wondering, Cindy Crawford will be celebrating Mother's Day with breakfast in bed. [Reuters]

• Christy Turlington, however, thinks that Mother's Day should be about activism and used as a platform for taking action against the AIDS crisis. [HuffPo]
• Hilary Duff just loves being old: "I am so excited that I'm finally at an age where they want me on the cover!" says Duff regarding her turn in Allure. [Fashion Week Daily]
• Lancome and Uma Thurman: Suing one another. Good times in the cosmetics industry. [AP]
• Chanel is opening an "ephemeral" boutique on London's Dover Street. Says Krazy Karl Lagerfeld, "The tone is at the same time post-modern and romantic. It integrates a delicate punk sophistication." [Vogue UK]
• Rachel Zoe loves expensive shit. [NYDailyNews]
• I don't care that she landed Johnny Depp, I still love Vanessa Paradis. [Sassybella]
• Camper shoes; Now for the ladies. [Times of London]
• Ginger Spice: Wears clothes from Topshop. [The Sun UK]

• OMG: Rachel Zoe has been disinvited from the Anna Wintour-hosted Metropolitan Museum of Art's Costume Institute Gala, taking place Monday night in New York. This is what you get when you tempt the gods and proclaim yourself more important than Vogue. [Fashion Week Daily]
  
• Also, Wintour has instructed Vogue staffers that they may only wear white, silver, or other "pale shades." Just like the colors of faces that she likes to see on her magazine's cover! [Fashion Week Daily]
  
• French Vogue editor-in-chief Carine Roitfeld and designer/Chanel creative director "Krazy" Karl Lagerfeld were both named to the Time 100 List, as influential members of the fashion community. Something about the way they both made fashion about "the street" or something. [Vogue UK]
  
• Gisele Bundchen is still the top-paid model, according to Forbes. Heidi Klum is the second. Take that, Moss. [Sassybella]

• Agyness Deyn: The mannequin. [BlackBook]
• The Rogan for Target collection is also going to be sold at Barneys. Which is not Target at all. [WSJ]
• Steve & Barry's is going to be shilling Sex and the City movie merchandise, which will be licensed for the store under Sarah Jessica Parker's "Bitten" label. [Sassybella]
• Uh oh: Seems the women behind the red carpet label Marchesa are having a bit of a tiff. While Georgina Chapman and Keren Craig used to be knows as the label's "co-designers", their titles have been changed on their website: Chapman is now listed as "designer" and Craig is noted as "co-founder." [Page Six]
• Dockers: Trying to reach out to the hip and the young. LOL. [MediaPost]
• Christian Siriano: Designed a dress for Puma. [Chic Report]
• Helena Christensen on why she loves photographer Peter Lindbergh: "Even when I looked pretty funny back in the day with my baby fat, perm, and hippie clothes, he put me on the cover of British Vogue!" Oh, models. [Fashion Week Daily]
• The latest beauty tool you didn't know you needed: An eyelash comb. [BellaSugar]
• The Versace resort in Dubai is... sorta exactly what you would expect a Versace resort in Dubai to be. [Chic Report]
• Diane von Furstenberg, Dolce & Gabbana, Oscar de la Renta, Akira Isogawa, the members of Coldplay, Jeff Koons, Philippe Starck and Tory Burch have all been asked to create "themes" for iGoogle's new customized homepage thingies. [Sassybella]
• Vanessa Paradis: The new face of Miu Miu? [Glaumrama]
• Calvin Klein went on a little field trip to Dubai last week. Blah blah, models behind plexiglass. The usual. [WWD, sub req'd]
• Jones New York: Stock is up, profits are down. The usual. [WWD, sub req'd]
• Kohl's: Gonna slow down its expansion plan 'cause their scared of the economy. The usual. [WWD, sub req'd]
• If you want to wear a pantsuit, make sure it's not double-breasted. [WSJ]
• Blue's Clues's: The shoes — at a Payless near you. [BrandWeek]

The Good:

The Bad:

The Ugly:

[Anaheim, California; February 11. Image via Bauer-Griffin]

• Apparently, Britney and her "friend" Sam Lutfi got in a fight last night: Photogs started snapping and she asked them to leave her alone. There's more, but let's just say that the cops were called to keep the paparazzi at bay and helicopters circled overhead. Clusterfuck. [TMZ, ONTD, Perez Hilton, Perez Hilton]
  
• Barbara Walters says she spoke with Lutfi, who told her that Britney has seen a shrink and has "mental issues which are treatable." Apparently Britney has mood swings and insomnia as well. [USA Today]
  
• No surprise here: sources interviewed in a profile of Britney in Blender paint a picture of a woman who has been used and lied to most of her life. Eric Foster White, who co-wrote six songs on her first album, says, "You have to understand that there's nobody in the equation who stood to benefit by giving it to her straight." [MSNBC]

• Oh, and Britney is allowed to have telephone contact with her kids, as per the hearing last week. Still no physical contact, though. [TMZ]
• Meanwhile, Zoey 101, the hit show of which Jamie Lynn Spears is the star, has returned for another season; the episodes were filmed before JLS became pregnant. This fourth season was always meant to be the last. [USA Today]
• Lindsay Lohan took at least one swig of vodka when she was out partying with Brody Jenner, Samantha Ronson and Stavros on Friday night. Rehab shmehab. [Page Six]
• By the by, since Brody Jenner has a girlfriend, a model named Cora Skinner, he denies hooking up with Lindsay and has issued a statement: "We were hanging out as friends and nothing happened," Jenner said. "We weren't 'all over' each other, and we definitely weren't making out. I am dating and really happy with Cora." OK, awesome, thanks. [Rush & Molloy]
• Filming of Michelle Williams' new movie, Blue Valentine, which also starts Ryan Gosling, has been put on hold while she mourns the death of Heath Ledger. [People]
• Nigella Lawson, who shares a £100 million fortune with her husband, Charles Saatchi, doesn't want to leave her children any money. She believes that kids should make their own loot: "I am determined that my children should have no financial security. It ruins people not having to earn money." She has a point but damn that's cold. [Telegraph]
• Vanessa Paradis bombed at a music awards show in France? Eh, who cares, she's got Johnny Depp. [Perez Hilton]
• Late Late Show host Craig Ferguson earned a perfect score on his citizenship test and the Scottish-born funnyman will be sworn in a few weeks from now. Congrats! [USA Today]
• Despite the writers' strike, the Grammys will happen! The WGA and the Recording Academy made an agreement; the ceremony will be February 10. Now if Amy Winehouse can just get her shit together... [Yahoo News]
• Blind item! "Which reality-show clogged network had to change its casting procedures after a racist internal policy was leaked? Producers had an informal ban on considering cast members who were 'too black.' They claimed it was because darker skin tones were hard to pick up on camera." [Gatecrasher]
• Oooh, actress Sean Young caused a boozy ruckus at the Directors Guild of America party? Sounds fun. [Page Six]
• Tracy Morgan: Seen shirtless and dancing on a banquette while asking a waitress if he could father her baby. You know, the usual. [Page Six]
• Kathy Griffin: double-banned from The View? Guess Barbara doesn't like being made fun of. [Page Six]
• A year after their breakup, Kylie Minogue had a rendez-vous with ex Olivier Martinez — and his dog. She's said his dog "was the love of my life" and was important to her recovery from cancer. Aw, happiness is a warm puppy. [Daily Mail]

• Okay, get ready for this: The UK'sNews Of The World alleges that, the night she ended up in the hospital, Britney Spears took 10 sleeping pills, 12 Vicodins, six Ritalins and 10 Zantacs — and washed them all down with her "purple drank", i.e. vodka, NyQuil and Red Bull. She also supposedly phoned her sister and shouted, "You're not going to be the only fucking Spears on the front cover of a magazine next week!" As for reports that Brit will be on Dr. Phil, a source says, "Based on the interaction between Dr. Phil and Britney . . . it'll be a cold day in hell before Britney goes on his show." [New York Post]
  
• Doctors at Cedars-Sinai hospital are pissed that Dr. Phil visited Britney in the first place — the patient has to give consent for stuff like that and it was a violation of her rights. [TMZ]
  
• Dr. Phil says he went to see Britney at the request of one Lynne Spears, her mother. [TMZ]

• Wait, what? A "reliable source" says Britney tested free of illegal drugs and alcohol while in Cedars-Sinai. Well Vicodin isn't illegal, right? Anyway, she might have seemed drugged but actually just has undiagnosed bipolar disorder, says an insider. [People]
• In any case, over the weekend, Britney went to Palm Desert with her new "friend," paparazzo Adnan Ghalib. [People]
• Meanwhile, Kevin Federline — who has sole legal and physical custody of the kids now — is in "lockdown mode" and just keeping his ass at home. Smart kid. [People]
• Britney's father "broke down" and was in tears after she was discharged from the hospital. [People]
• Also, despite reports to the contrary, Britney did not have a gun in the house when she held her children hostage. [Perez Hilton]
• Is Nicole Kidman knocked up? Signs point to maybe. [Page Six]
• Author Andrew Morton's new book alleges that Tom Cruise is the number-two guy at the Church of Scientology and that frozen sperm was used to spawn Suri, who has L. Ron Hubbard as her real baby-daddy. Sigh. [The Sun]
• Also, Scientologists threatened to blackmail Nicole Kidman if she said anything bad about the religion, Morton's book claims. [Sydney Morning Herald]
• Singer Norah Jones and live-in love Lee Alexander (bassist in her band) have broken up. We know where to find some sad songs for them to listen to. [Page Six]
• An insider says that Paul McCartney's secret heart surgery was one of the reasons he and Heather Mills split: She was focused on him and he wasn't taking care of himself. Yawn. [Page Six]
• Because of the writers' strike, no one seems to know what the hell is going on with the Golden Globes... and it's happening Sunday. [Gatecrasher]
• In fact, NBC may not even televise the Golden Globes. Which might help, since the WGA says guild members would not picket if the event wasn't televised. [UPI]
• Blind item! "Which highbrow talk show host telephoned a female massage therapist from the Pierre hotel last week and requested she perform intimate acts with his lady-friend, while he watched? Sadly, the answer was 'No.'" [Gatecrasher]
• Mick Jagger gathered almost all seven of his offspring for the holidays... Only Jade and Elizabeth didn't join him on Mustique — they're not fans of his current girlfriend, L'Wren Scott. [Rush & Molloy]
• Producers of The Hills convinced JustinBobby to play Audrina's boyfriend by paying him as a cast member. Romantic! [Rush & Molloy]
• Lily Allen: "I get upset about illiterate young people. Someone texted me in fuckin text speak without any vowels, so I replied just in vowels." [Mirror]
• Funnyman Jack Black's wife is expecting a second child! Doesn't he seem like a fun dad? [Breitbart]
• Reese Witherspoon was number one in a survey of most-liked celebs; Jennifer Aniston was number two. This country is kind of weird. [Reuters]
• Just like her ex, Riley Giles, an Italian waiter has also sold his Lindsay Lohan story to the News Of The World. Alessandro di Nunzio says LL was "extremely flexible and adventurous" in the bedroom and her panties and bra did not match. Alessandro was "hurt and sad" when he found out that LL was also seeing two other dudes while in Italy, but we suspect cash he got from the UK tab should ease his pain. [MSNBC]
• Madonna: Still in India, doing stuff like singing karaoke with the Maharaja of Jodhpur. [Mirror]
• Charlize Theron's Aunt says her brother, Charlize's father, was "mildmannered" and never would have attacked his wife or daughter. She has doubts about what really happened 16 years ago when Charlize'smother shot her father. [Daily Mail]
• Vanessa Paradis says she is "not proud" of her past as teen pop star — her song, "Joe le Taxi" was No. 1 in France for 14 weeks in 1987. Have you seen the video? She was cute! [Independent]

[Paris, November 26. Images via Splash.]