• Courtney Love threatened to sue Perez Hilton for publishing her messages about Frances Bean Cobain, yet she posted about her daughter again today saying, "im angry at these people not Frances id just prefer she not become Jaimie L Spears."

• Courtney wrote on Facebook this afternoon: "theres not a whole lot i can do about it. this is like a hand grenade got thrown into our lives and its not Frances! i am angry at these people not Frances id just prefer she not become Jaimie L Spears, she should go be a writer or an a...rtist wich i support 100% but this is a circus and it pains me cos i know she hates it." She added, "i very much miss my daighter, i know she knows how miserable i am im despairing and so sad, so so sad, but i just want to help her be happy, thats it, get her house and get her school and thats all ive ever wanted." [TMZ]
• Courtney Love says Perez Hilton defamed her by posting the two earlier Facebook messages about Frances Bean Cobain and the Cobain family and now she's getting her lawyer involved. In another Facebook message posted today Love writes: "perez you know what YOUR lawyer saud? to a client? "if shed just give in and sell rest for 15 million all of this would dissapear like magic" tell him to suck i oh by the way you lying queen youve just lied and defamed me and my child for the last time i fuckign HATE YOU you fat ass piece of bully shit PART of that was from a personal lettr and PART of that YOU made up, and thats ILLEGAL." [BlackBook Mag]
• The arbitrator has made his decision on how the Gosselins' assets should be divided up. His decision is confidential, but sources say now that the money has been split a divorce decree is "imminent." [TMZ]
• A source says Kate Gosselin "couldn't be happier" with how their assets were divided. "Kate is thrilled." [Radar Online]
• Kate Hudson and A-Rod actually broke up weeks ago, according to insiders. "Kate decided to take her mom to some of the press stuff and premieres as her date – that was good for her," says the source. "They both have kids and totally different lives ... They may not be done working it out though." [People]
• Tiger Woods' lady friends Jamie Jungers and Jaimee Grubbs ran into each other at a club in L.A. earlier this week. Grubbs told Jungers to stay away from her because she "hasn't talked to Tiger since the scandal broke, and she's done with it," said a source. "She wants to be disassociated from the whole thing. She just wants to do her own thing." So that's why she sold her story to the tabloids instead of just "doing her own thing" on Tool Acadamy? [E!]
• Tiger Woods' 14th named mistress Theresa Rogers heard the rumors that Tiger paid Rachel Uchitel millions to keep quiet and now she wants a payoff too. [Radar Online]
• Did you hear that Elin Nordegren would be appearing in ads for Puma? Well, it isn't true. A spokesman for the company says, "To correct recent news headlines, Puma has no plans to engage in a brand sponsorshop agreement with Elin Woods." [Extra]
• Sources say that next week Elin Nordegren is meeting with a divorce attorney who has worked with Nicole Kidman, Nicolas Cage and Britney Spears. [Radar Online]
• Just six months after opening his Mirimichi golf course near Memphis, Justin Timberlake is closing it from January to July to make improvements. [AP]
• Sophia Coppola and her boyfriend Thomas Mars are expecting their second child. [People]
• Garth Brooks is suing his hometown hospital in Yukon, Oklahoma because he donated $500,000 for a building to be named after his late mother four years ago, but the building never materialized. [CNN]
• There are rumors that Alexa Chung quit her MTV show because she is suffering from an eating disorder, but her rep insists, "She is absolutely exhausted. She's been working 16-hour days on four live shows a week. She didn't want to do that any more. It's been absolutely grueling and she hasn't had time to explore New York." The rep added, "Everybody's body looks different depending on what you wear. It's very easy to find a picture with bones sticking out. Alexa's weight hasn't changed for four years and she takes her role as a style icon and someone young girls look up to very seriously." [News Of The World]
• Jesse McCartney dumped Hayden Panettiere and is hooking up with his ex-girlfriend Katie Cassidy. [E!]
• BBC Radio DJ Chris Evans apologized to listeners for George Michael swearing during an interview. This article doesn't say what George Michael said. [The Mirror]
• During an interview CNN's Wolf Blitzer asked Shakira, '"She Wolf.' I have a personal interest in the name. How did you come up with that name?" She replied, "I bet you do. Well you were part of the reason." [Press Release]
• Usher's ex-wife Tameka Raymond said, "While I am flattered at the rumor circulating about being considered to join the cast of The Real Housewives of Atlanta, I am absolutely not joining the cast. I was initially approached by the producers for last season and declined. At this point, my priorities are focusing on being a mom and my philanthropy, Lost Ones Foundation." [E!]
• Mo'Nique says she heard that she was nominated for a Golden Globe "In the bathroom with my husband having a conversation, just laughing and joking and he gets a text from one of the producers of ‘The Mo'Nique Show,' saying ‘Congratulations, on the Golden Globe nomination.' I just started laughing. I said, O.K.!... our bathroom is I guess, you know how people have their favorite room? It just happens to be our bathroom. That's normally where we get all our news!" [NYT]
• John Krasinski says of working with Meryl Streep in It's Complicated, "It was my first day, and it was our first big scene together. As Zoe (Kazan, as Streep's middle child) is driving away, I put my arm around Meryl, and I say, 'They grow up so fast.' I was slowly trying not to feel so awkward, but every single one of my fingers knew I was touching Meryl Streep." [USA Today]
• Emily Blunt says of Queen Victoria, who she plays in The Young Victoria, "I only knew the image of her as the grizzled old woman, to read about this spicy, spunky girl who said no to the world, it was really exciting and revealing to read her diaries and her letters. She was a modern girl, refusing to conform. And I loved that. She had this incredibly oppressive, lonely childhood, and yet she had the steeliness to rise above it all and become a success." [USA Today]
• Keira Knightley, who is making her debut on London's West End on Friday says, "(I know I will be) burned alive (by the critics). I'm not coming into it with any great expectations of coming away with great reviews. I thought if I don't do theatre right now, I think I'm going to start being too terrified to do it. So I just thought, okay, dive in and give it a go. If my best isn't good enough, then so be it." [Daily Express]
• Miss Piggy has some very un-P.C. views on female domestic abusers. She says: "My Kermie is nothing like [Tiger Woods]. I just want to say, he would never do anything untoward moi, but, if he did, you can rest assured there'd be a hole in one, and he'd be the one!"[People]
• Daniel Day Lewis said watching Nine at the New York premiere "was nerve-wracking." He added, "That's the one and only time I will do that." [Showbiz 411]
• When asked if she'll appear in Ghostbusters 3, Sigourney Weaver said, "I might do it; I didn't realize I was in it. So I'm going to read the script. I was happy to discover, though, that my little baby son [from Ghostbusters 2] has grown up and become a ghostbuster. I think that Ivan [Reitman] wants our little grouplet together. I think it's a lovely idea to have another generation of people discover the characters. I remember I was opening the door for some trick-or-treaters last Halloween and a bunch of ghostbusters came to door. And one woman was [my character, Dana Barrett], and because I was at a friend's house, it was a complete accident. Might as well feed them a new movie." [WSJ]
• "I don't really desire things. I prefer to spend my money on experiences, on meals or travel. I look at the world through a green lens now, but you can't make yourself crazy. That feeling of green guilt can be really inhibiting," says Rachel McAdams. "It's about a changing mind-set, remembering to turn off the water when you are brushing your teeth." [Daily Express]

• Oh, dear. Tiger Woods' fourth alleged mistress has been identified as Jamie Jungers, a cocktail waitress and "Trashygirls.com" model from Las Vegas. Jungers' mother, when asked if her daughter had been seeing Woods, answered: "Oh yeah for sure." [E!]

• The sister of another alleged mistress, a diner waitress named Mindy Lawton, says she knew what Tiger was up to: "My sister was just a little girl on an hourly wage at Perkins," Lynn Lawton says, "We knew what he wanted her for. But she wouldn't believe it. Maybe Tiger thought the security guards would think she was his cleaning lady,' Lynn conjectured. Or maybe they had just seen it all before and knew to turn a blind eye. [DailyMail]
• Lawton, meanwhile, has given a tell-all to the News of the World, spilling details of her sex life with Woods and stating about Woods' wife, Elin, that "It must be awful for her to know her husband was going behind her back for sex with so many girls. She must feel very dirty knowing that when he was trying for a baby with her he was having sex with me. I guess she will be pretty devastated but in the time I knew Tiger I never got the impression that the marriage was happy." [NewsOfTheWorld]
• And according to the Daily News, yet another woman, Cori Rist, was having an affair with Tiger, as well. "Tiger would typically get a large suite at a hotel. Someone would book Cori an adjacent room, so she wouldn't be seen coming into his room," says a source. [NYDN]
• Rachel Uchitel, the first woman whose name was attached to Tiger Woods during Mistress-A-Thon 2009, was reportedly upset when she learned of the other women Tiger was seeing: "Rachel was mad at Tiger when she found out about the other girls and did not speak to him for three days, but he texted her," says a source, "She is telling friends that he doesn't blame her for this all getting out." [People]
• Meanwhile, Tiger's wife, Elin Nordegren, signed a £1.4 million deal for a home on "on an island near Stockholm" just last week. [DailyExpress]
• After being hospitalized for allegedly swallowing a large amount of pills, Alexa Ray Joel, according to her rep, "is stable and her doctors are assessing her needs," and according to Alexa's father, Billy Joel, "She is going to be fine." [People]
• Donald Trump is none to happy about the fact that Michale Salahi was trying to pass herself off as a former Miss USA: "She couldn't have been a former Miss USA if she'd tried." [WashingtonPost]
• Eki "Eddie" Fatu, aka "Umaga," a former WWE wrestler, died Friday of a massive heart attack at the age of 36. [Yahoo]
• Susan Boyle is set to sing at the White House in January, not only to celebrate Michelle Obama's 46th birthday, but, according to a White House aide, for "a double celebration because three days later, January 20, marks the first anniversary of the president taking office. I would expect that a formal invitation will be made to Miss Boyle in the very near future. The President and First Lady absolutely love her voice and will be delighted if she agrees." [DailyExpress]
• Usher, who is guest-starring on tonight's episode of Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, says the show makes him cry: "I can't say I'm a crier every time I watch. But, this time, I cried. They got me on camera crying. I couldn't help it." [PageSix]
• Ron Livingston of Office Space is suing Wikipedia for libel, as someone keeps editing Livingston's page to state that he is in a relationship with another man. Whoever has been editing the page has also set up Facebook profiles for Livingston and the man, Lee Dennison, claiming that the two are "in a relationship." [UPI]
• "Well, I live in Tennessee so it is slightly different than living in L.A. I just worked with Sophia Loren [in Nine], and she is so gorgeous and she has such grace. I use her as a role model."- Nicole Kidman, answering a reader's question on how she copes with "working in an industry that refuses to let women age naturally and gracefully." [People]
• Cate Blanchett says she doesn't have any movies lined up right now because "There's nothing I've read that's any good." [Showbiz411]
• After his last album only sold 121,000 copies, Marilyn Manson has been dropped by Interscope Records. He seems a bit relieved about it, though: "I was so restrained from the music that I wanted to make — what they would allow, they would put out, what ideas they would allow to be conveyed in these videos. At least half of my creative output has been squashed, so now I think people can expect a whole lot more." [UPI]
• Though Prince William and Kate Middleton haven't announced their engagement yet, the Royal Family has reportedly hired a "wedding and event consultant." [Telegraph]
• Taylor Lautner is in talks to play "Max Steel," an hero based on an action figure. He'll be no match for Max Power! [UPI]

• Courtney Love is making vicious accusations via Facebook, and both Edward Norton and Britney Spears are involved.

In one message, Courtney writes (and consider there to be a giant [sic] after everything):

IF something happens to me, NO my will is NOT at Greenberg Glusker, that will is FORGERY…i created a new one per lISA FERGUSONs attorney who cannot be FOUND but that needs altering as it has Edward in it and Norton doesn't have a CLUE how evil his own BM is he wont fuck a future Senator/Film Actor … i m shcoked at myself i never kiss and tell unless im really mad at an ex for like LOSING 300,000$ of my kid hes supposed to be paternal abouts money, oh yeah Norton just LOST 300k

As for Britney, Courtney says:

britneys dad molested her , imagine the father that molested you owning you for slavery while your forced to sing songs picked for thier sexual content every night, insane right? i have it on First had authority, and fight as hard as she is and does she still didnt pull that card, its a pride thing i can relate to, However they want to play dirty, lets go, Im SO not affraid of the little trolls who hit this when i was fucked up who are called lawyers. lets GO.

Um… yeah. Shit. Speechless. [Movieline]

• In other news, Courtney Love to her band to a strip club and left them there. [Page Six]
• We've heard Britney Spears wants to get married again, but have we heard this? A source says: "She is in love with the idea of marriage. She has been married only twice, but has proposed to many more." [MSNBC via News.com.au]
• The White House state dinner was star-studded! In attendance: Producers David Geffen and Jeffrey Katzenberg, directors Steven Spielberg and M. Night Shyamalan, actor Blair Underwood and actress Alfre Woodward. Plus: Deepak Chopra and journalists Sanjay Gupta, Katie Couric, Fareed Zakaria, Robin Roberts and Brian Williams. And Jennifer Hudson performed! My last dinner party involved plastic cups and white zinfandel. [UPI]
• If something is really good, Rihanna calls it "barf." "Usually it's ‘ill' or ‘I want to throw up on it," she says. "But barf is the worst," meaning the best. "Barf is 10 out of 10." [NY Times]
• Damn: Rihanna is getting paid $500,000 to to perform at a New Year's Eve party at the Emirates Palace Hotel in Abu Dhabi. Can she wear that white Fifth Element bandage jumpsuit in the UAE? [Page Six]
• Things are heating up between Emma Watson and her Spanish rock star. [Telegraph]
• Usher is dating a record exec — named Grace Miguel — who used to work at the label he's signed to. And, shocker! Grace and Usher's mom, Jonetta, do not get along. Sound familiar? The same thing happened with Usher's wife, Tameka Foster. [Gatecrasher]
• Here's a happy Thanksgiving: Ellen DeGeneres gave an out-of-work mom from the Bronx $10,000 and a new car. [NY Daily News]
• Donny Osmond won Dancing With The Stars. Then there was a fire on the set. [People]
• DWTS judge Carrie Ann Inaba is having surgery: "I have arthritis. The space around my spinal cord has become compressed," Inaba explains. "I have been locked. My neck was so stiff. We're hoping this procedure will relieve that." [People]
• The pyramid design of Lady Gaga's Heartbeats headphones was inspired by her fashion choices when growing up: "I wore studded leather jackets, me and my friends in New York. Lifestyle, grit, passion and love for music, freedom. These were the things I thought about when we were designing [the headphones]." [People]
• Beyoncé just finished her tour, and told the crowd at her last stop — in Nottingham, England — that she hopes to see them all in a year with a new album. Work work work! [Reuters]
• Jennifer Lopez's ex-husband, Ojani Noa, admits he's tried to sell footage of himself and La Lopez from their time together, but it's not sleazy: "They think I have a sex tape with her and that I'm trying to sell it. My tape is from our honeymoon, the wedding, us hanging out. There's no nudity-maybe one spanking. There's moments of her fighting with her mom...couples having fun and kissing. If someone has a sex tape, it's not me." [E!]
• Congrats to Alan Cumming, who was made an Office of the British Empire at Buckingham Palace on Tuesday. The Scottish-born actor and gay rights advocate reportedly dressed in tartan head-to-toe for the occasion. Must find pix! [UPI]
• American Idol season 3 contestant Jon Peter Lewis (who?) has issues with Adam Lambert's AMA performance: "All this nonsense about Adam Lambert's whole project being art is bogus. That idea is absurd. It's like calling Thomas Kinkade art. What a sham." [Us Magazine]
• Melissa Etheridge has advice for Adam Lambert: "Don't believe everything they say. Stay true to yourself. The only person who can answer what you should do is  yourself. Love yourself. You will hear as many people praise you as you will hear them tear you down." [E!]
• Rosie O'Donnell was asked if she's enjoying the single life. She replied: "I'm not." [NY Daily News]
• Would you like to see a picture of the Real Housewives Of NYC frolicking in the Virgin Islands? [NY Post]
• "A million fans are being invited to take part in the composition of a pointillist portrait of the late U.S. pop icon Michael Jackson… The project has the blessing of Jackson's brother, Jermaine." [UPI]
• The Official Michael Jackson Opus book is 26 lbs., 400 pages and $249. [The Life Files]
• Julie Andrews will play London's O2 arena, and the venerable Clive Davis writes: "Whether or not Andrews's voice is the flawless multi-octave instrument that it once was, she has always been a consummate professional… Besides, legends are in short supply at the moment." [The Times Of London]
• Transformers director Michael Bay hosted a reunion of the show's cast and crew the other night in NYC, and Megan Fox did not attend. [Page Six]
• Amber Rose asked a stranger in a bathroom to zip up the back of her dress for her, saying: . "I have a hard time staying in this thing, but Kanye loves it." [Page Six]
• The new Miss California, Nicole Johnson, says she once dated Michael Phelps. And! Phelps may have dated Carrie Prejean as well. [TMZ]
• "A nude photo of film director Roman Polanski, who is now being held in a Swiss prison, and his wife Sharon Tate taken shortly before she was brutally murdered, will be sold at an upcoming auction where it could fetch more than $10,000, organizers said." [Reuters]
• Avril Lavigne was seen "passionately making out with a mystery man" in NYC Tuesday night. She was seen with Wilmer Valderrama over the weekend… Maybe divorce makes you horny? [Radar Online]
• The Pussycat Dolls have broken up and no one is speaking to Nicole Scherzinger, if you care. [Page Six]
• "Nellie McKay has three loves - animals, the Poconos, and Doris Day." [Philadelphia Inquirer]
• "Cagefighter's mummy: Nasty Jordan has been horrid to my little Alex." [The Sun]
• "She's a remarkable story… But you're on air every day. Eventually you think, 'do people really want to hear me talk anymore?'" — Phil Donahue, on Oprah ending her show. [Page Six]
• "Wait … is that Zac Posen? Wow." — Zac Efron. [Gatecrasher]
• Ten years ago I wouldn't have thought about having any children at all. [But do I want some?] Yes, yes, yes. I haven't given up hope. I find I'm not as bad with children as I used to be. I see a lot of children are over-parented now, over-adored and over-spoiled. I quite like children to be left alone to get on with it." — Hugh Grant. [Daily Express]
• "I think a show like this probably couldn't have happened five years ago, but I think with the success of American Idol and So You Think You Can Dance and other movie musicals, like Hairspray, Chicago and Nine that's coming up, they set the groundwork for people to accept it and being excited about it. I think we're putting a different twist on it to make it fun and interesting and kind of cool." — Glee's Matthew Morrison. [CNN]
• "You know that devil on your shoulder that tells you terrible things about people and of course you'd never say 'maybe you don't really believe.' She has no filter, and it just comes right out. So I'm a nice person after I leave Glee because I get to exercise the heinous behavior while I'm in a track suit yelling at defenseless children." — Jane Lynch. [CNN]
• "As traumatic and as terrifying as it was — and sometimes I wish it never happened — my whole life changed in the most amazing way after I went through that. If I didn't go through that, I swear, you would've been interviewing a completely different person." — Rihanna, on being assaulted by Chris Brown. [NY Times]
• "Everyone wanted me to see a therapist to just talk about it, and I refused. In Barbados we don't do that. We keep it in our family, and figure it out and move on. I just put my game face on and went on with my life. But deep down inside I had some things to get past, and it came out in the music." — Rihanna. [NY Times]

• In the December Elle Sarah Jessica Parker (over?)shares her thoughts on her new twin girls revealing, "I love the smell of diapers; I even like when they're wet and you smell them all warm like a baked good..."

• "I love the smell of Balmex. Love it." As for her decision to hire a surrogate to have the girls, she said, "I knew there would be lots of opinions about, ‘Well, why didn't you adopt? Why didn't you do this? Why didn't you do that?' and the truth of the matter is, it wasn't one or the other for us. We had explored, and continue to explore all options, and this one just happened first. This isn't the period at the end of the sentence." [Just Jared]
• Yesterday ,Lindsay Lohan Tweeted that Michael Lohan used to threatened to kill her mother Dina if she tried to leave him. Today, Michael responded, "That's a lie... I guess Lindsay is on more drugs than I thought to say something like that … No wonder why God is taking her entire career away from her. Because she's forsaken everything He's given her and she's done nothing but misuse all the gifts she's given." [People]
• Lindsay Lohan missed a business meeting today because she was partying into the wee hours of the morning. "This meeting was very important for her career," said a source. "She simply failed to appear and never called to even cancel." [Radar Online]
• Police sources say they searched the Las Vegas home of 19-year-old Rachel Lee and found clothing belonging to Lindsay Lohan and Audrina Patridge, and three personal photos of Paris Hilton. [L.A.T.]
• Justin Timberlake wants his temporary restraining order against Karen McNeil, the woman he says is stalking him, made permanent. Two of his bodyguards filed testimony against her but when the judge said he wanted JT to show up in court on Monday and speak for himself, his lawyer moved to get a different judge. [TMZ]
• Star's cover story this week featured ridiculous stories about Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie's "secret life of binge drinking, mind games, drugs, lovers, and more!", ostensibly based on Ian Halperin's upcoming book Brangelina Exposed. "I was stunned... I never spoke to [the magazine]," says Halperin. "In fact, I finished writing the book late last night which was hours after the Star story broke!" [Us]
• In "Party In The USA" Miley Cyrus sings about listening to a Jay-Z song, but in the interview at the link she admits, "I picked that song 'cause I needed something to go with my clothing line, I didn't write it... I've never even heard a Jay-Z song." N.Y. Magazine]
• December 14 has been set as the first court date in TLC's breach of contract lawsuit against Jon Gosselin. [Radar Online]
• According to court papers filed by TLC, several of the network's advertisers complained about Jon Gosselin's "erratic, widely publicized behavior." [Radar Online]
• A man named Ronnie Newt who is trying to prove that a 12-year old boy named Prince Michael Malachi Jet Jackson is Michael Jackson's son says the Jackson family is harassing him. He asked for a restraining order against Randy Jackson and Joe Jackson, saying, "I was told to stay out of the M.J. love child story. That some one could get kill [sic] for that kind of money." [TMZ]
• This Is It has only been out for two weeks but it's already passed the $100 million mark at the international box office. [Hollywood Reporter]
• Randy Quaid sent a letter to a judge claiming that he and his wife Evi Quaid never received the hotel bills they're accused of skipping out on. He also mentions that Evi has earned many people's respect, "including Karl Rove, who on a recent visit to Marfa made more than one flirtatious advance toward Evi!" [Radar Online]
• Paula Abdul has reunited with Arsenio Hall, after dating him 20 years ago. "Arsenio reached out to Paula because he thought she needed a friend to talk to, someone she could relate to. Arsenio knows what it's like to leave a hit TV show. One phone call led to another, and the next thing you know, they were making a date," said a source. "This could be the perfect situation for the two of them. Paula and Arsenio know each other inside and out." [Contact Music]
• Carrie Prejean was removed from a conservative "Defenders of the Family" event in New Jersey after word that she made a sex tape got out. [TMZ]
• Usher's divorce from Tameka Raymond was finalized today. [USA Today]
• Joe Francis avoided jail time today when a judge sentenced him to time served,$250,000 restitution and a $10,000 fine for pleading guilty to filing false tax returns. [TMZ]
• Peter Andre and Katie Price saw each other for the first time since their split in May when their son Harvey was taken to the hospital with breathing difficulties. He's OK and has been discharged. [The Mirror]
• "Becoming a parent is the most selfless act, and you need to be at a point in your life where you can give up anything and everything for a child. I don't know if you know how to that when you're in your 20s," says 32-year-old new mom Sarah Michelle Gellar. Her husband, 33-year-old Freddie Prinze Jr., adds, "I'm so happy we didn't have kids in our 20s – I just didn't know a thing. You have so much more patience in your 30s, and I feel like I appreciate this so much more." [People]
• Jemaine Clement says Flight of the Conchords may not return for another season because, "Bret and I are both fathers," Clement told us during an interview to promote his (troubled) new film Gentlemen Broncos. "We know if we take on another season, that means we're not gonna see our family for a year." [N.Y. Magazine]
• Thandie Newton says she "fell madly in love" with her husband Ol Parker in 1997 when she appeared in a movie he wrote. "I'd never experienced that before. Up until then, my relationships had always been more based on people wanting to be with me. When I met Ol, I was dating a really sweet, lovely man and I had to leave him straight away, even though I wasn't even going out with Ol!" she said. "But as soon as I met Ol, it kind of cut off any other blood vessels to anywhere else. We got married about two years later; we've just had our 11th wedding anniversary." [Daily Express]
• In Precious Erica Watson plays a small role as a little girl's abusive mom. When asked if it was hard to scream at the girl she said, "Not at all! The inner bitch in me was finally allowed to come out, and I had a ball! (laughs) But on a serious note, I was a little nervous about being mean to her, but she loved it! She knew that we were just 'pretending' and she made it very easy for me to treat her horribly!" [The Frisky]
• Jon Hamm once said in an interview that he thinks Don Draper and Rachel Menken were soul mates. Maggie Siff, who played Menken, says she agrees: "I think Matt Weiner is an incredibly smart storyteller, and everybody knows from the beginning that this is a guy who's going to go through a lot of women. But I think that the way that our story ended up getting set up within the series is that you feel her absence. She's gone, and then you're like, Well, where did she go? And I think there are a lot of things in that show that come and go, and you feel their echoes. And so in a way I feel like that's probably true between them." [N.Y. Magazine]
• John Slattery says of Roger Sterling, the character he plays on Mad Men, "I think he may've invented a few of his own S.T.D.'s. There has to be some strain of sexual disease out there that he's responsible for. He was patient zero. It's his namesake. His S.T.D. is a Sterling Transmitted Disease." [Vanity Fair]

• Rosie O'Donnell has confirmed the rumors that her five-year marriage to Kelli Carpenter is on the rocks. She said: "Kelli and I love each other very much and we are working on our issues..."

• Rosie continued, "Those are the only words I am ever going to say. Ever. And that is something that has been agreed upon by all parties. But everything's fine and everybody's good and we're still both raising them together. We will both continue to parent them and we're friendly and everything's all right." [Radar Online]
• Kelli Carpenter reportedly took their youngest child (who she gave birth to) and moved into their Manhattan condo a few months ago, while Rosie O'Donnell is staying in their Nyack, NY home with their three adopted children. Sources say Kelli initiated the split because she couldn't deal with Rosie's mood swings. [Radar Online]
• Randy Jackson says Michael Jackson's signature on his 2002 will must be forged because on the date the will was signed MJ was with Randy in New York protesting against Sony executive Tommy Mattola. According to Al Sharpton's rep, he was also at the protest and can confirm that MJ was in New York, not signing the will in L.A. [TMZ]
• A literary agent is shopping a book containing Michael Jackson's "private writings" and drawings. [Crains New York]
• Jon Gosselin is demanding $12,000 an hour to guest-host a Florida radio show. He was offered first class plane tickets and a luxury hotel room but Jon's rep said he should also be paid because, "[Jon's] name and appearance on your show will instantly draw press ... and will be a high point for the show." The rep described Gosselin as "quite funny, sharp witted and interesting." O-rly? [TMZ]
• The lawyer who sponsored attorney Mark Heller's petition to represent Jon Gosselin in Pennsylvania has made a motion to formally withdraw his support, so it looks like Jon may need a new lawyer. [TMZ]
• Carrie Prejean has responded to Miss California USA's lawsuit against her by releasing this statement through her lawyer: "They have proven, once again, that they will use whatever scurrilous accusations they can dredge up – or invent – to try and tarnish Carrie's reputation and her good name. It is both appalling and pathetic to see K2 and their friends in Hollywood try to destroy this young woman simply for standing up for her beliefs." [Radar Online]
• Roman Polanski's lawyers need to get their story straight. One says there's "no change in strategy" and Polanski will "continue to fight extradition." Another says he may voluntarily surrender to U.S. authorities. [AP]
• Joel Madden wrote on his blog: "I keep getting emails from old friends and family asking about a wedding. NO we didn't get married." So Star's new cover story about Joel and Nicole Richie being married by a Rev. Moon over the internet isn't true? [Perez Hilton]
• Regarding Bronson Pinchot's accusations that as a young man Tom Cruise constantly made homophobic comments, his publicist said, "Obviously this is so far removed from who Tom Cruise is as a person, this must have been said in jest." It's a pretty clever statement, considering it's unclear whether he means Cruise or Pinchot was joking. [N.Y. Magazine]
• Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel went to see Where the Wild Things Are in Vancouver, where she's shooting a movie. Justin put his feet up on the seat in front of him and his head on Jess's shoulder. "They laughed a lot," said an eyewitness. "They seem so happy to be back together, to have worked things out." [Ok]
• The status of Usher's marriage to Tameka Foster Raymond has been changed to "disposed," which usually means it's been finalized. [TMZ]
• Amy Ryan gave birth to Georgia Gracie Slovin on October 15, her first child with her fiance, comedy writer Eric Slovin. [UPI]
• A Run-DMC musical is in the works. "Their work speaks to everybody," says producer Paula Wagner, "and the story of their rise to fame is innately theatrical." [N.Y.T.]
• Susan Sarandon has won the Stockholm film festival's lifetime achievement award for her "reflection, seduction and rebellion" in playing many "multifaceted female characters." [USA Today]
• Reggie Miller has obtained a restraining order against Alexander Von Furstenberg, who threatened to "beat him down" because he thinks Reggie hit on his fiancée Ali Kay. [Radar Online]
• Mayumi Heene's former client, Sunda Croonquist, says the family was homeless. They were staying in their work studio and "were living in conditions that were not acceptable", "slept on the floor or couches," and didn't have a bathroom. [Radar Online]
• Hulk Hogan says he considered suicide after Linda Hogan left him but Laila Ali, his Gladiators co-star, saved his life. He explained he took Xanax with rum and had his hand on the trigger of a gun when Ali called him after noticing he looked distracted at work. [CNN]
• Patricia Field called Sex and the City 2: Electric Boogaloo "Star Wars for women all over the world." Um, no. [People]
• Madonna has give Glee the rights to her catalogue and there's an all-Madonna episode in the works. [Entertainment Weekly]
• David Boreanaz was cheating on his wife of eight years, Jaime Bergman, while she was pregnant with their second child this spring. [Star]
• Emma Thompson, who attended the graduation of her adopted son Tindyebwa Agaba from the University of Exeter in July, will return to the school next month to lead talks on race relations. She said, "Exeter is very white and middle class and it needs to be cracked open a bit. I shall be there with my son, Tindy, who is from Rwanda. He had some unpleasant experiences at Exeter, but also some good ones. That's what's great, that the university has reacted with great oomph. They see we do need to open our eyes and doors and see what's been going on with people. I've been very impressed with that and I'll be there for three or four days." [Telegraph]
• The National Organization for Women sent a letter to David Letterman's producing partner Rob Burnett criticizing Dave for creating a "toxic environment" for the women he works with. Burnett defended Letterman, saying many women hold positions of power at their production company, no one has ever accused him of sexual harassment, and the scandal "did not stem from a complaint from anyone on our staff, but rather from an alleged attempt to commit a crime" against Letterman [Extra]
• Whitney Houston is selling her New Jersey home, which was featured on Being Bobby Brown for $2.5 million. There are pictures of the house here: [Real Estalker]
• "There are no childhoods any more," Smokey Robinson. "Our kids are indoctrinated from the time they're two years old with the news, the computer, advertising, every single, solitary thing. Our kids are brilliant – they're not stupid. This stuff is touching them. It's taking their childhood. They got too much information too fast." [The Telegraph]
• Alexa Chung says the biggest difference between New York and London is, "The rules in America are very oppressive. There are so many rules that people love to stick by. Like ID'ing you all the time, not letting you bringing a coffee into this venue (laughs). People are just sticklers for rules and they don't let you sneak a sneaky one. Like smoking cigarettes… It seems quite regimented." [Fashion Informer]
• "I equate fame with being a blue alien," says Juliette Lewis. "Some people are like [animated whisper], 'Look at the blue alien, she's so cute!' and other people are like [disgusted sneer], 'Oh my God, don't talk to the blue alien!' And, however they treat you, at the end of the day you're still a blue alien." [The Telegraph]
• Kim Kardashian, who recently turned 29, says, "I'm not going to lie, I woke up this morning feeling a little old! It's my last year in my 20s." [People]
• Kim Kardashian will guest judge tonight's episode of America's Next Top Model. She says, "I'm just a big fan of the show and I adore Tyra... I was so excited to give these girls advice and make a difference for their careers." [People]
• Mischa Barton says, "We have paint parties at my house, and everyone comes over and paints on blank canvases, and just does things for fun," she told us. "My kind of art has always been film. That's my primary interest, and everything else is just a hobby." [N.Y. Magazine]
• Michael Buble, who used to sleep with his bible every night praying that God would make him a singer, says, "As I get older I have a different concept of what God is to me and - it's not that I'm into organized religion - the truth is that I don't know. I'm sorry if that offends people out there, but I'm just being honest, I don't know. So instead of making it about a certain God, I have a relationship with that one thing. The universe. God. You can call it Jesus, you can call it Jehovah. You can call it whatever you want. Buddha if you want. Whatever. When I was a kid I definitely put it out there to the universe and to my God and I prayed that it would happen and it's obvious that it worked." [AP]
• Snoop Dogg says he referenced True Blood in "Gangsta Luv" because, "You know I'm down with it... I love that show. I wish I could be on it. I'd be a hell of a vampire, don't you think? So what's happenin'? True Blood, get at me - Snoop Dogg wants to be a vampire." [MTV]

• Radar Online reports that Heidi Klum gave birth to her fourth child, a daughter named Lou Samuel, early this morning. Us however, insists it isn't true, but labor is imminent. This shouldn't be so complicated, people. [Radar Online, Us]

• Last night on Models of the Runway, while the models were lined up and waiting to be eliminated, one of them farted. Tara Egan said, "The tension got broken a little bit on the runway because, I'm not gonna name names, but I think someone had a couple of, uh, gastrointestinal problems while we were on the runway." Heidi Klum said, "What happened? Someone farted? It wasn't me. Who's not laughing over there?" Celine Chua took responsibility explaining, "I'm a great farter." [E!]
• VIDEO: Mickey Rourke explains that when he uses the word f-word it has "nothing to do with gay," by making a weird football analogy and repeating the word about a dozen times. [TMZ]
• The president of GLAAD has issued a statement saying: "This is a slur that, regardless of what Mickey Rourke has convinced himself that it means, is often the last word that gay people and gay youth in particular, hear before they're bullied, harassed or assaulted. Rourke is showing himself to be painfully ignorant of how this vulgar, abusive slur feeds a climate of anti-gay hatred, intolerance and violence." [TMZ]
• John Legend says while other stars have come out in support of Roman Polanski, "I'm in support of justice. I don't get why everyone's defending his actions." And shook his head in disgust. Previously Legend Tweeted: "A man in his 30's cannot have 'consensual' sex with a 13-year-old. It is legally impossible for a child to give consent. It's rape." [Radar Online]
• A source says the Gosselin kids are, "confused and distraught and are acting out all the time in an effort to get attention from their parents." [Us]
• Kate Gosselin has filed for alimony from Jon Gosselin. [The Insider]
• BREAKING: Jon Gosselin bought his girlfriend Hailey Glassman a few drinks at a New York pub. [TMZ]
• David Hasselhoff was drinking at Simon Cowell's birthday party this past weekend. [TMZ]
• Hasselhoff was hospitalized for two days in London after a drunken bender that ended with him allegedly punching a doctor. [TMZ]
• A day after Miley Cyrus deleted her Twitter account, her dad Billy Ray Cyrus Tweeted: "I understand 'it is true one bad apple spoils the bunch.' But listen to the words of your songs 'Stand… for what ya believe in'…Remember? ... Miley. You are a light in a world of darkness. You were born"Destiny Hope Cyrus" for a reason.You can't leave everyone now.We r countin on u." [Perez Hilton]
• Rod Blagojevich will appear on The Celebrity Apprentice. [USA Today]
• A police officer testified in the John Travolta extortion trial that Pleasant Bridgewater destroyed the form with his signature when she "noticed the situation was about to explode." [The Mirror]
• Tori Spelling Tweeted about the Star magazine cover that claims she's wasting away at 95 lbs, "LIES! ... Literally not 1 factual thing in entire article. And, come 2 my house & weigh me Star! I'm 107 lbs." [People]
• Solja Boy was arrested in Georgia on Wednesday night after allegedly running from a police officer. Police say he was among a group of about 40 people hanging out in the yard of an abandoned house. [TMZ]
• Method Man was arrested for allegedly failing to pay taxes for four years but he says, "everything will be resolved. Trust me, it's a misunderstanding." [TMZ]
• The Duggar's first grandchild, Mackynzie Renée Duggar, was born at the home of her parents Joshua and Anna. They say they haven't committed to all of their children having "M" names, like Mackynzie's 18 aunts and uncles (and one on the way) who all have "J" names. [People]
• Usher recently called the cops on his soon-to-be-ex wife Tameka Raymond because he claims she snuck onto his property and stole one of his cars. Police determined there was no evidence to substantiate his claim. [TMZ]
• Audrina Patridge broke up with BMX racer Corey Bohan and was spotted on a date with Derek White, Justin Bobby's BFF. [Star]
• Paris Hilton has ordered a $4,500 miniature pig from a breeder. She will be delivered in about a month and named "Princess Pigelette." [TMZ]
• Marlon Jackson addressed the Australian TV blackface controversy on behalf of his family, saying, "Man, if they turned up looking like that in the United States ... They probably weren't trying to be offensive or anything of that nature with the family. We thank Harry Connick Jr. for speaking out, but we also understand that they weren't trying to be disrespectful to us." [News.com.au]
• Robin Givens, who was abused by Mike Tyson, says she can relate to what Rihanna's going through now. "You do need time to figure your life out," she says. "I do feel that if she speaks out about it people will listen to her. But she is young and I can imagine the pain and the confusion she is going through." [People]
• On an episode of Oprah that airs Monday, Mike Tyson says he's still unclear on the details about the death of his 4-year-old daughter Exodus in May, "Because if I know, then there might be a blame for it... And if there's somebody to blame for it, there will be a problem." She was found by her 7-year-old brother tangled in a cord dangling from a treadmill. [People]
• Cherry Jones and her longtime girlfriend Sarah Paulson have split up. Jones said she and Paulson are "great. It's the happiest break up that's ever been. We grew so much together and now we can send each other off with a kiss and great love." [Us]
• Daniel Radcliffe has been cast in a reading of How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying in New York. [Variety]
• Check out Hilary Swank on the cover of Town & Country: [ONTD]
• Sean Connery's doctors told him to give up alcohol after diagnosing him with a heart condition but he says, "I do drink red wine because of my friend David Murray, who owns two French wine estates. He showed me the evidence that it was good for the health. I favour Merlots from Chile for their value and I keep a good deal of California wine in my cellar. I have one that cost me $2,000 for two cases, which I think is rather steep." [Daily Express]
• Eight TV variety specials Ann-Margret did decades ago are being edited into a new one-hour documentary. [The Village Voice]
• In her new book Finding It, Valerie Bertinelli says that she used to be a binge eater but she's learned to satisfy herself with hiking, spending time with her family and boyfriend, and exploring her new relationship with God. "I was still hungry - as hungry as I had ever been," Bertinelli writes. "It was a different kind of hunger, though: one that I couldn't satisfy with food, and had no desire to." [AP]
• Matt Damon wrote an article in Parade about the importance of ensuring children have clean water around the world. He says: "I co-founded Water.org, which focuses on water and sanitation. I was in Ethiopia earlier this year, and I watched children taking filthy water out of a hand-dug well and putting it in bottles to take to school. The water was so dirty, it looked like chocolate milk. I wanted to knock it out of their hands and say, "Don't drink that-it could kill you." The dilemma is that drinking nothing at all will kill them even faster. Parents in these impoverished areas lose children every year to diseases that could be completely prevented if they had access to clean water." [Parade]
• Vince Vaughn says he proposed to Kyla Weber earlier this year on a certain romantic day because, "Valentine's Day rolled around and I figured this is not a ship to be missed ... [It] worked out great because it would have been kind of weird to have talked about [getting engaged] and then skipped Valentine's Day as if who knows when this thing is coming." [People]
• Vaughn says of the character he plays in Couples Retreat not being tempted to cheat, "It was kind of nice to make a movie where it was like 'We made a commitment. We're in this 'cause we said we wanted to be, and we have people counting on us. You know what? We believe in this and it's worth it to us, and I love you.'" [CNN]
• Harmony Korine explains how he got the idea for his new film Trash Humpers: "I would walk my dog at night back behind the alleyways in the neighborhood where I live in Nashville. And sometimes I would see these trash bins propped up against garages or lying on the ground. These overhead lights would be shining on them, giving them a real dramatic effect. The trash bins began to resemble human forms to me - almost like a war zone where the trash bins had been molested and beaten up and stuff. Sometimes, the way they were propped, they looked very humpable. Then I remembered that in my neighborhood growing up, there were these elderly peeping toms who would stare into my neighbor's window. They lived in an old person's home down the road, and they would come out at night. And I just put these ideas together." [N.Y. Magazine]
• Terry Gilliam, who worked with Heath Ledger on The Brothers Grimm and the upcoming Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus says, "I loved working with Heath on Brothers Grimm, he was fantastic. He went through an interesting time after Brokeback Mountain because he was so inundated with the big time. I would ask him about certain roles and he would say yes, and then no, so I learnt not to put any pressure on him because everyone else was. I didn't actually ask him about this one, I waited until he asked me." [The Telegraph]
• Pete Yorn says he asked Scarlett Johansson to record a duets album even though he didn't know if she could sing. "I figured, you know, most actors are multitalented. They've got to be able to do a lot of things and they probably have some ability to sing," he said. [CBS News]

• Frances Bean Cobain has written an open letter to Ali Lohan. Would you like to know what it says? Here goes — and consider it to be [sic]-filled:

"This is my open letter to Ali Lohan.
Your not entitled to anything simply because your sister has a recognizable name. Your idea of fame isn't fame. It's infamy. You want to be famous? Work your ass off and make decisions that could potentially catapult your career into a lasting one. Notariety for who you are and notaritey for the work you produce are two completely differnt things. I understand that you have been brought up in an envirtoment where the idea of fame is easily achievable but, that's not an excuse. You lack the talent, social understanding and credibility to be anything other then infamous. Your careere choices, thus far, will transcend a future career as someone who attempted to be famous, but never quite achieved it. And if you do, it will be the formality of fame that puts you on the covers of tabloids, while the public idly watches you plumit into the murky abyss shared with the likes of Spencer Pratt & Jon Gosslin who, i'm sure, will steal your money whilst there. Fortunately for the world, there are people who have and don't have recognizable names, who have obtained artistic integrity and will one day, hopefully, bring that tangible artisticness into light again. Though, its hard to think thats achievable when people like You ali lohan are rendering the world of true talent by attempting to make your entitled ass noticed. How is this fair to the people who HAVE artistic integrity, or a mind? How is it fair to those who truly have something to offer the human race other then a dwindling last name and a few shitty films, both of which, solidified the idea that your just a celebrities sibling. I recognize that i might come across as harsh and no, i don't personally know you, but its the actions that you take, that speak for you. You blatently don't care how your recognized, its the objective to get famous and that is what makes you replaceable and a recycled idea .Well, im ashamed to have to be grouped into the same category of person as you. I would rather die a most painful death the be assoicated with the kind of careere your trying to make for your self. I hope i'm wrong because generally i'm not a very judgmental person, but in the case of you, that is MY entitlement." Phew! …And scene. [ONTD]

• Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston had a "secret meeting" in New York, yet somehow the Daily Fail knows that the rendez-vous took place in a hotel and that Brad "unloaded his emotional baggage" on Jen. [Daily Mail]
• I wish I'd seen the Madonna and Lady Gaga dance off on Saturday night after SNL; sources say Madonna seemed to be the winner. [Page Six]
• "Madonna and her toy boy Jesus Luz had a bust-up following the pop queen's admission she'd rather get hit by a train than get hitched again." He supposedly feels like a fool and is heartbroken. [The Sun]
• OMG Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart went out for dinner (with friends)! They ate and enjoyed themselves! They were acting like a couple! All together, now: TWILIGHTISREALSPARKLEVAMP4EVA. [People]
• After being in a car accident on Monday, Nicole Richie's been checked out at the hospital, visited by her mother at home, and hired a lawyer. Hope everything is okay. [People]
• Jon Gosselin on that missing $230,000 from the Gosselin's joint account: "I never took any money." [TMZ]
• Lamar Odom has met with his lawyer regarding a prenup in his wedding to Khloe Kardashian, and word is, he will not be giving her half his earnings. [TMZ]
• Spoilers! You know this pic of Kim Cattrall in a wedding dress for Sex And The City 2: Electric Boogaloo? It's supposedly a fake-out; the ones getting married are Stanford and Anthony. More spoilery details at the link. [JustJared]
• SHOCKER: Mariah Carey has been acting like a diva on her new tour. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Click for a pic of Kate Hudson in a wedding dress, modeling for a Bazaar photo shoot. [NY Post]
• Organizers "worked overtime" to keep feuding singers Lily Allen and Katy Perry away from each other at the Chanel show in Paris. [The Sun]
• Kevin Federline's former landlords want $110,661 in unpaid rent and damages — which include spit marks on the exterior paint, gutters full of cigarette butts and beer bottles, broken tiles, a broken dishwasher and dismantled smoke detectors. Popo wow. [TMZ]
• Tyra Banks doesn't drink anymore, and a "source" says, "I guess that's how she ended up dropping 30 pounds." Anonymous weight loss speculation FTW! [Page Six]
• Shannen Doherty is working on a reality show that will highlight her "lighter and funnier" side. [E!]
• Queen Latifah is concerned about the hip-hop scene: "Never in my career do I remember rap being so male-dominated. In videos, women are basically shown as the girl you shake the booty with. They're objectified. There are females out there who can rap, who listen to rap. Missy and Lil' Kim and the young up-and-coming ones need an opportunity to be heard. I think we're all masculine and feminine, and a society can't be right if you don't honor the feminine voice." [USA Today]
• Usher's divorce: Delayed. [NY Daily News]
• "The FBI investigated whether Anna Nicole Smith was part of a plot to kill her tycoon husband's son, whom she was battling for his late dad's fortune, but prosecutors ultimately decided there wasn't enough evidence to charge the Playboy Playmate who died in 2007 from a drug overdose, newly released files show." [AP, LA Times]
• A man who bid in the canceled Michael Jackson auction is pissed he didn't get the stuff he was willing to pay for. He's suing for $5,000,000. [TMZ]
• Honestly, I do not even get why story about Jude Law, Hamlet and someone being upstaged by a skull is "news." It sounds like much ado without nothing. [Telegraph]
• The number of viewers of The Jay Leno Show: In decline. [USA Today]
• Nick Lachey avoided Jessica Simpson while in Vegas and refused to be photographed with on and off girlfriend Vanessa Minnillo. [Page Six]
• No one wants to be on Tinsley Mortimer's reality show. [Page Six]
• "Mel's anti-Jew-spew DWI wiped off books." [NY Post]
• Is Cougar Town a virus? It's spreading. The show will air in territories across Europe, Africa and the Middle East. This is what we export, people. Cougars. Can I go back to bed now? [Variety]
• If you shop at the right consignment stores, you could find clothes worn by Padma Lakshmi, who's given up her pre-pregnancy ensembles for charity. [Page Six]
• Something happened to Tony Roberts during the Sunday matinee of the Broadway play The Royal Family. His daughter reports the actor had a minor seizure and is now "feeling great." [USA Today]
• At the link, you'll find Chris Daughtry's tips for a happy marriage. If you're interested. [People]
• Elvis Presley's grandson Ben Presley, 17, just inked a $5 million record deal but says: "The music will be nothing like Elvis, nothing like him at all." Good luck with that! [NY Post]
• Little Britain star Matt Lucas had tried to get his former husband Kevin McGee off coke, and even paid for rehab; McGee committed suicide earlier this week. [The Sun]
• "I wanted somebody who had a huge presence-charismatic, able to dominate a room [yet] who was very sensitive, whose emotions were right under the surface." — Spike Jonze, on casting James Gandolfini's voice in Where The Wild Things Are. [The Daily Beast]
• "I think the way kids create is so inspiring. They're drawing a picture? They love the picture they drew; they're not tortured about it. But I think that that's only one side of me. Right now, it's a good story because it makes a tie-in with the movie." — Spike Jonze, on getting labeled an overgrown child. [Daily Beast]
• "I have kissed a lot of rock stars in my time but seriously never so many as the last 24 hours." — Courtney Love. [Page Six]
• "Hanging around with Chris, he always has a video camera, and he's like, 'I'm gonna ask you some questions about hair.' I talked a lot, but that turned out to be, uh, funny, I guess… I had a perm and when guys have it straightened, they put the rollers in their head, you know, so you get that Super Fly look." — Ice-T, who is in Chris Rock's Good Hair and, yes, used to wear rollers. [NY Mag]
• "I'd never been averse to any kind of medication, but you get brainwashed. I started reading all these books and doing pregnancy yoga. By the end, you feel you have to go natural in order to be a real woman. I got myself a doula [birthing assistant] and a water tank and struggled on for 24 hours, and then I had an epidural. I can remember saying to the anaesthetist, 'Oh, I love you, thank you so much.' I don't know what I was thinking." — Emily Mortimer, who is expecting her second child in January. [Telegraph]
• "It was important for me to write that, to get it off my chest. And to discuss it with a therapist, and tell my parents — which I did, eventually, though it took me about 20 years. And hopefully it will be helpful to someone out there who has gone through a similar situation. [The incident] left me not knowing how to deal with certain things. Boys can put pressure on you, and I didn't do so well with saying no. I had a lot to figure out, and I did eventually, but it was tough. We have to do a better job of looking out for our young girls, because there are predators out there." — Queen Latifah, regarding a song on her new album, Persona, about when she was molested as a 5-year-old by a male babysitter. [USA Today]
• "I get offered movies on a regular basis, but most of them are terrible because most of the movies that are made are terrible. I don't think anybody saw Adventureland, but they marketed it as a big comedy, so I get sent these really shitty scripts that I think people assume that was like. So many scripts where people are having sex with each other. Every script starts off with sex… [With Zombieland…they were nervous to hire me because I'm not famous. There were other more famous people who were auditioning for it. I think the main reason I got into it was because Sony really likes Greg Mottola, who directed Adventureland, so he vouched for me, because he directed their biggest movie in the last several years, Superbad. — Jesse Eisenberg. [BlackBook]
• "Guns seem dumb. I felt bad holding guns because I don't know what influence it has on people watching movies. You can make the argument that it lets people take out their aggression so they don't do it in real life. You can also make the argument that it makes guns look fun and people are going take them out and play with them." — Jesse Eisenberg. [BlackBook]
• "I normally get recognized as either a guy from Spring Awakening, or there's this other guy that screams at me all the time, Hey Napoleon Dynamite! I don't go to nightclubs, I don't go to nice restaurants. There's no perk that can be had aside from getting a slice of pizza at interviews. But you could. People really could exploit it. I haven't been single for 7 years, but I know people who are maybe my level of attractiveness or less and they can have sex quite often… That's great, because then they'll tell me about it." — Jesse Eisenberg. [BlackBook]

• "I've thought about clothing and jewelry lines," says Usher. "But fragrance stays on when everything else comes off." [People]
• Bottom of the barrel? For $8, American Apparel will sell you a bag of fabric scraps. [BF]

• Elle Creative Director Joe Zee dined with R.J. Cutler, the director of The September Issue. Which obviously means that he's going to spend two more years making a movie about Elle now! [FWD]
• Says lost soul Ashley Olsen, in fashion, "everyone is just really looking out for themselves. I don't know if I'll be designing this collection forever. A couple of years from now, I'm sure I'll want to do something else, and I'm not going to shy away from that. What if I just want to be an artist, or if I want to go back to acting? Which is not in the cards, but what if I wanted to do that?" [Daily Express]
• An Hermès representative says the rumors that creative director Jean Paul Gaultier is going to leave the company are false. Gaultier has been in his position for six years, and Hermès has experienced continued strong sales from its luxury categories since the start of the recession. [FashionMag]
• Christian Blanckaert, Hermès' director of international affairs, is leaving the company in early September. Blanckaert will become the non-executive chairman of the French children's clothing line Petit Bateau, and is expected to pursue a more international strategy for the brand. [WWD]
• Meanwhile, some anonymous sources in the finance industry are saying that Louis Vuitton Moët Hennessy may spin off DKNY, the Donna Karan diffusion label it has owned since 2001. Or that it may sell Moët Hennessy itself, where revenues fell 17% in the first half of 2009. The reason the luxury conglomerate supposedly wants to free up some cash? To make a bid for Hermès, which is trading well below its usual share price. [Fashionista]
  
• Conservative party supporter Anya Hindmarch: "I started my business when I was 18, and I realized the difference it made having Thatcher in power. It was the start of privatization-there was a feeling of ‘Get out there, get going, be an entrepreneur.' I've seen what politics can do to make a difference. It really inspires me and that's why I've been passionate about it." [VF]
• Lara Stone is set to curate the choices available at Not Just A Label's online shop, a home for avant-garde and emerging designers. Lara's choices go on sale on September 2. [UK Elle]
• Uniqlo has a licensing deal with Disney that'll allow it to roll out Disney-themed apparel starting next month. Which should mean the mouse products will hit stores around the same time as Jil Sander's long-awaited first collection for the retailer. [WWD]
• Jean-Charles de Castelbajac is launching a diffusion line called JC/DC. The line will be presented in London and again in Paris at the upcoming shows, and the company wants real-life hepcats to model its wares — anyone who wants to apply for a spot in the runway lineup can do so via the websites of Dazed & Confused or Jalouse magazine, respectively. [WWD]
• Someone named Bronson van Wyck is obsessed with "The Penguin Sparkling Water Maker from Williams-Sonoma. The penguin makes the water fizzy. You can adjust from superfizzy like Perrier to moderate like S. Pellegrino to milder like Hendon." Socials! They're not like us at all. [WWD]
• Vogue Brasil mis-spelled photographer Guy Bourdin's name as "Guy Bourdain" in huge font on its cover. [MadeinBrazil]
• Rosemary Port, the writer behind the infamous "Skanks In NYC" hate-blog against model Liskula Cohen, says that she will continue her $15 million lawsuit against Google for disclosing her e-mail address and IP to Cohen. Even though Google only disclosed those details after losing its long legal battle and being ordered to so by a Manhattan supreme court judge! Port feels her right to privacy has been violated, and alleges of Cohen, "By going to the press, she defamed herself." Her lawyer had this to say: "I'm ready to take this all the way to the Supreme Court. Our Founding Fathers wrote 'The Federalist Papers' under pseudonyms. Inherent in the First Amendment is the right to speak anonymously. Shouldn't that right extend to the new public square of the Internet?" Which, if you think about it, is an airtight argument. Doesn't anyone else remember reading that long footnote in the Federalist Papers where James Madison goes on and on about how Brutus is, like, such a ho? And then of course next month Robert Yates was all like, Nuh uh, you're a big fat skank, Publius, and everyone knows it! Whatever, Rosemary Port. Defamation isn't traditionally considered protected speech. [NYDN]
• Louis Vuitton has won a $400,000 judgment against Bonini Handbags for trademark infringement. [WWD]
• Derek Blasberg watched The Rachel Zoe Project in Los Angeles, with Rachel Zoe. "Watching the actual show and having an alternate show happening in front of me was surreal. And kind of confusing. There was Brad on TV wearing a Missoni sequined shift dress impersonating his boss, and then there, in the flesh, was Brad trying on a Louis Vuitton tennis skirt and booties impersonating his boss. Taylor was on TV moaning, and there she was in person moaning." [StyleFile]
• Casual Male, a U.S. maker of men's plus-size clothing, has seen its quarterly profits increase by 92.1% on last year, even as sales fell 13.4%. [WWD]

• Petersen's group aims to appoint a financial guardian to watch over any money made by Suleman's children during the filming of their upcoming reality show. Suleman attempted to have the judge dismiss the petition, but the judge refused. [Reuters]
• Model Jasmine Fiore's body was identified by the serial numbers in her breast implants—a necessary step after, as Dodai mentioned yesterday, her killer had removed her teeth and fingers in an attempt to throw off the police investigation. Suspect Ryan Jenkins of VH1's Megan Wants A Millionaire is still at large. [USWeekly]
• VH1 is still uncertain as to whether I Love Money 3, a show Jenkins competed on, will ever air. [NYTimes]
• "If someone told me that I would [go into space and] never come back, and if I didn't have a family, I would definitely go and spend my last days in outer space. Escaping into another planet or another world or another way of life . . . keeps me centered and balanced."-Mya [PageSix]
• The release of Martin Scorsese's Shutter Island, starring Leonardo DiCaprio and Michelle Williams, has been moved from October to February, meaning the film won't be released in time for Oscar consideration this year. [NYTimes]
• Just in case you were wondering, Tilda Swinton is not having threesomes with John Byrne, the father of her children, and current boyfriend Sandro Kopp. "I've been painted as a benign eccentric who's living there while some guy's shagging his sweetheart," Byrne says, "Why would I do that?" [PageSix]
• Angela Lansbury will return to Broadway to play Catherine Zeta-Jones' mother in a revival of A Little Night Music. [DailyExpress]
• Jon Gosselin has been spending his weekends partying it up at Foxwoods Casino with his girlfriend, Hailey Glassman. He shall leave no cliches unturned, my friends. [PageSix]
• Blind Item: "This very large, former A list television actor and now movie actor got his nickname Flash because he likes nothing more than to wear boxers around the set and makes sure his fly always stays open." [BlindGossip]
• "Hollywood is just like high school: The popular people love the other popular people. And the thing is, some people aren't nice. Or they are nice, but only to your face, not elsewhere."- Amanda Seyfried [DailyMail]
• Usher claims to own 10,000 pairs of shoes. [TheSun]
• Britain's Radio 1 has "snubbed" Madonna by refusing to play her new single, Celebration. [TheSun]
• Mark Wahlberg is reportedly concerned about co-star Christian Bale, who may be risking his health in an effort to lose weight for his role as a drug addict in the upcoming film The Fighter. "Christian is a method actor. If a role calls for him to look like a drug dealer, or he has to play someone who hasn't slept in a year, he'll go without food to look the part," says a source, "But the danger comes after he takes off that weight, and then eats everything in sight to put it back on for the next role. That kind of yo-yo dieting can be deadly. Mark and Christian are friends, and Mark is concerned about him." Hopefully this doesn't mean they're done, professionally. [ONTD]
• Bryan Singer is set to remake the 1981 film Excalibur. [DailyExpress]
• According to Heidi Montag, her husband, Spencer Pratt thinks Angelina Jolie is "a home-wrecking hussy." [PopCrunch]
• Meanwhile, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are reportedly "grooming" their daughter, Shiloh to be an actress. [Celebitchy]
• Kristen Stewart will be playing a stripper in the upcoming film Welcome To The Rileys. [Star]
• A source on the set of Twilight flick Eclipse claims that Kristen and Robert Pattinson are "definitely a couple and very much in love. Neither of them is rushing into anything, they are just having a good time hanging out, but they plan to explore their relationship even more while they are filming." [ShowbizSpy]
• Hey Girl, Ryan Gosling is going on tour with his band, Dead Man's Bones, and "the opening act for the shows will be a talent show, organized by the band and featuring local talent in each city." I assume you guys will be at these shows holding up giant signs that read, "Hey Ryan- Eff it, let's get a taco." [JustJared]

• Billy Ray Cyrus knows you're worried about Miley Cyrus dancing on an ice cream cart while holding a pole, and he has this to say:

"You know what? I just think that Miley loves entertaining people… I always tell her to love what you're doing and stay focused for the love of the art and not worry so much about opinion," In other words: Keep on poledancin', honey! [Access Hollywood]

• Miley Cyrus has a new man, her Last Song costar Liam Hemsworth, 18. A quick Google search finds him fairly cute. Or, you know, hot. [Gatecrasher]
• Gerard Butler threw Jennifer Aniston into the trunk of a car yesterday… on the set of The Bounty. [NY Post]
• Madonna — recently seen kissing Jesus Luz in Portofino, Italy while on a break from touring — is happy to have Luz around. And her kids "see Jesus as 'Mommy's friend.'" [MSNBC Scoop]
• Ugh: Stomach-churning details from the Jasmine Fiore murder. Cops claim that the murdered model's teeth and fingers were removed, probably to keep authorities from ID'ing the body. Suspect Ryan Jenkins (Jasmine's ex-husband), who taped Megan Wants A Millionaire in March, is still at large. [AP]
• The producers of Megan Wants A Millionaire say: "[The production company] was not aware of Ryan Jenkins' record when it cast him… Obviously, if the company had been given a full picture of his background, he would never have been allowed on the show. The company did have in place what it thought was a thorough vetting process that involved complete background checks by an outside company for all contestants on its shows. Clearly, the process did not work properly in this case." Jenkins was convicted of assaulting a girlfriend in 2005. [TMZ]
• Robert Hasman, a former boyfriend of Jasmine Fiore, was texting with Jasmine right before she died. She texted Hasman, saying she was going to Las Vegas to see him. TMZ claims: "It appears [Ryan] Jenkins may have seen the text because Hasman received a text shortly after saying 'suck it.'" Did the text set Jenkins off and send him into a murderous rage? [TMZ]
• Hmm. Jasmine Fiore never told her "mother figure" she married Ryan Jenkins. [CNN]
• A woman charged with snooping at Britney Spears' home in April has been sentenced to three years probation and 240 hours of community service. [Contact Music]
• Lindsay Lohan and Michael Lohan are NOT distant and are always happy to see each other. Says Michael Lohan. [Radar Online]
• Lindsay Lohan Tweeted that she'd be shopping at a store in downtown Manhattan yesterday afternoon, and then complained to friends, "Why are there all these people here?" when she arrived and found a pack of paparazzi outside the store. [Page Six]
• Let's just pretend this Heidi Montag workout website and fitness e-book is not happening, mmmkay? [Perez]
• Maybe we can also pretend that Spencer Pratt isn't talking about his new book How To Be Famous and saying stuff like "If I weren't me, I'd hate me. When you're the villain, you don't have to worry about how your enemy feels." [Gatecrasher]
• "Battle of the busty blonde singers: Heidi Montag and Kim Zolciak face off on the airwaves." [NY Daily News]
• BREAKING: Tyra Banks and rumored boyfriend John Utendahl had dinner. [Page Six]
• Katy Perry weighs in on the Lady Gaga-has-a-penis rumor: "Oh please, it's all very calculated. She knows what she's doing." As calculated as a former Christian singer warbling about a same-sex kiss? [LA Times]
• Hayden Panettiere, 20, is now dating Pink Taco owner Harry Morton, son of Hard Rock mogul Peter Morton. This column notes: "Harry, 28, is only slightly more age-appropriate for Panetierre than her 32-year-old ex, Milo Ventimiglia." [Page Six]
• Claire Danes looks smoking hot wearing platforms and fishnets in this photo shoot. [BlackBook]
• Some idiot threw a dildo at American Idol runner-up Adam Lambert during a show, and "Glambert" kicked it right back into the crowd. [Perez]
• Garcelle Beauvais-Nilon was on the Wendy Williams show when she let it slip that Jamie Foxx had a new baby. Apparently this had been a secret, but the baby girl's mother is a real-estate agent, described as "tall, muscular, pretty, brunette and white." [Mirror]
• Usher's ex-wife Tameka Foster wrote a blog entry for the Huffington Post called "She's Pretty For A Dark-Skinned Girl." Author Aisha Curry wrote the book Pretty For A Black Girl in 2007 and says: "I cannot and will not say she stole my idea, because you never should assume. However, I will say that It seemed like one heck of a coincidence and everything I touched on she did." [ONTD]
• Here's an interview with Michael Jackson's personal artist, David Nordahl, who created mythical and fantastical paintings for the King Of Pop. He created a work called Field of Dreams, in which MJ leads children of all nationalities (plus sister Janet, AIDS activist Ryan White and actor Macaulay Culkin) on a sunlit path. Click through for a different painting of MJ surrounded by cherubs. [USA Today]
• "A chubby clinic worker has claimed he had a LOVE AFFAIR with Michael Jackson." [The Sun]
• Tickets for the Michael Jackson movie go on sale September 27. [CNN]
• If you take pictures of Kenny Chesney during his concert, he will jump down and steal your memory card. [UPI]
• The divorce between Kelis and Nas is getting down to the dirty details: Who should get how much money. Apparently Nas makes about $244,000 a month; Kelis makes a mere $13,000 a month. She's asking for child support, spousal support, retro child support and retro spousal support. Maybe she should sing a song that's like, "Hey, hubby, baby I want your money…" Oh. Wait. [TMZ]
• Real Housewife Of Orange County Lynne Curtin was supposed to be evicted from her home but the papers were served to her daughter, who's a minor. [TMZ]
• Ladies love Salman Rushdie. [Page Six]
• Nelly and Ashanti: Splitsville. [Gatecrasher]
• Barbra Streisand's ex-boyfriend is auctioning off tapes he made of her earliest performances, in case you have $1 million lying around. [Page Six]
• Kids In The Hall reunion! [Variety]
• Billy Bob Thornton will star in a boxing flick called Pound for Pound, based on a novel by F.X. Toole, the author of the book that became Million Dollar Baby. [The Hollywood Reporter]
• "I don't think I have ever changed a diaper." — newly pregnant Kourtney Kardashian. [E!]
• "I wish my dad was here, but I know that he is here with us [in spirit], and I feel like this is definitely a blessing from him. It's bittersweet, and that's how I feel about getting married, too. I almost don't want to get married because I don't want him to not be there." — Kourtney Kardashian, on being pregnant without being able to talk to her late father, famed attorney Robert Kardashian. [People]
• "People come up to me in airports, and they're asking for my autograph not because I'm the drummer for the Chili Peppers. They really think I'm Will Ferrell. [I say] 'No, I'm not.' But they're still like, 'I loved you in 'Old School.' You're so funny.'" — Chad Smith. And really, the side by side pictures show an uncanny resemblance. [Gatecrasher]
• "He's such a cutie patootie. Sometimes I forget just how good-looking he is. While relationships are work, this just didn't feel like it. It's the kind of work that feels energizing rather than enervating. There's that pledge, and people talk about it being claustrophobic but I find it the opposite. I find it very freeing to know that, okay, it takes constant nurturing and attention, but I can also stop looking for the one-that's established. I can apply myself in other ways now. I have more time and energy to get shit done." — Claire Danes on recognizing fiancée Hugh Dancy is "the one." [BlackBook]
• "The fun thing about surgery is that they always have new things and you can always try things. I'm not sure what's on that list right now, but I'm sure as I get older, I'll want to keep up with maintenance as most Hollywood does." — Heidi Montag. [Perez]

• Heidi Montag's Playboy shoot: Not that X-Rated. Sources say the mag had strict instructions when photographing her:

"No nipples, no vagina, no ass." Guess that's where she keeps her good Christian values? [TMZ]

• Madonna has signed on to appear as a mentor in the new season of UK reality show X Factor. Also guest starring: Robbie Williams, Whitney Houston and Rihanna. [Telegraph]
• Kate Hudson is dating Alex Rodriguez and Friday Night Lights actress Minka Kelly is dating A-Rod rival Derek Jeter. Word is: "Things between the two photogenic actresses are frostier than the new stadium's $9 beer." [Page Six]
• Mary-Kate and Ashley: Double-dating, chain smoking, tickling. [Page Six]
• Seth MacFarlane says Family Guy's Stewie is gay. "We had an episode that went all the way to the script phase in which Stewie does come out. It had to do with the harassment he took from other kids at school. He ends up going back in time to prevent a passage in Leviticus from being written: 'Thou shalt not lie with mankind as with womankind. It is an abomination.' But we decided it's better to keep it vague, which makes more sense because he's a 1-year-old. Ultimately, Stewie will be gay or a very unhappy repressed heterosexual. It also explains why he's so hellbent on killing [his mother, Lois] and taking over the world: He has a lot of aggression, which comes from confusion and uncertainty about his orientation." [Gatecrasher]
• When Kourtney Kardashian says she is "so shocked" by her pregnancy, you've got to wonder what she means: She knows how to get knocked up, right? Anyways, she says: We were in the Everglades and I kept feeling nauseous and sick. I just kept thinking something wasn't right. I went to the doctor and he confirmed the news. I was just so shocked." Kourtney has not revealed who impregnated her, but in the past she was linked to skateboarder Scott Disick, whose website notes: "As for girls, he was known as being able to manipulate them into anything." [People]
• Anna Faris and Chris Pratt: Married. And it happened it Bali on July 9. As you'll recall, they were seen on what was thought to be a wedding trip in Hawaii in late July, then her rep said it wasn't true that they'd gotten hitched in Hawaii. Which wasn't exactly a lie. [People]
• Kate Gosselin on Jon Gosselin's relationship(s): "It is hurtful. Very hurtful. To be very honest, the most hurtful part is when his decisions directly affect our children. That's the hardest part for me." [MSNBC Scoop]
• Michael Jackson's "Will You Be There" will be remade with John Mayer, Lionel Richie, Whitney Houston, Usher, Dionne Warwick, Wyclef and Jermaine Jackson. Larry King's wife Shawn is spearheading the tribute, which will either be awesome or awful. [TMZ]
• …And Shawn King has just pulled out of a duet with Jermaine Jackson she was supposed to do in Vienna. [Page Six]
• Jennie Garth basically confirms that Robert Pattinson is dating Kristen Stewart by saying, "I can't say [which New Moon costar] …but he is dating one of them!" Oh man, it's Buff Werewolf, isn't it? Remember when they held hands? [Gatecrasher]
• "David Beckham disappoints Chelsea and Tottenham by insisting AC Milan is most likely destination for England star." [Daily Mail]
• "Beckhams set to swap LA for Italy?" [Mirror]
• Is Denzel Washington — like so many other Hollywood types — looking to make a living in TV? He's considering an executive producer role on a cop drama called Billy Stiles, written by Virgil Williams, who has penned scripts for 24 and ER. [Reuters]
• Kendra Wilkinson and Hank Baskett: Expecting a boy.
  "Whether this little guy is a jock or not, he's definitely going to be a mama's boy," Kendra says. "And there's no doubt he's gonna be a handsome one … just look at his dad!" [People]
• Rebecca Romijn is giving husband Jerry O'Connell diaper duty while she works on new show Eastwick. This column calls him Mr. Mom, but shouldn't it just be "Dad"? [People]
• Glenn Close used to be in Up With People?!?!? [Page Six]
• Michael Douglas has released a statement regarding his son, Cameron, being busted for meth and thrown in jail for heroin: "The family is devastated and very disappointed in Cameron's recent behavior. Any family who has dealt with substance abuse knows how devastating it can be." [People, NY Daily News]
• "A New York City judge says a jury can decide whether the author of a best-selling book about the death of Playboy playmate Anna Nicole Smith defamed her lawyer by calling him a pimp." [USA Today]
• "Anna Nicole Smith pal Howard K. Stern wins OK to sue writer for libel over gay sex video tale" [NY Daily News]
• Mickey Rourke is not impressed when you "make it rain" in the club. [Page Six]
• "Jon Hamm and Jennifer Westfeldt are ready to take on Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell for the title of Longest Dating (and Unmarried) Couple." [Gatecrasher]
• Acting legend Charles Dance, whom you may have seen in Gosford Park, says Paris Hilton's British Best Friend series is "a show for airheads, starring an airhead." Her show is bumping his university drama, Trinity. [The Sun]
• Paul Giamatti will replace Sean Penn as Larry in the Three Stooges movie. Benecio Del Toro will play Moe, and Curly has yet to be cast. [NY Daily News]
• Kim Basinger may play Zac Efron's mom in The Death and Life of Charlie St. Cloud, a flick about a grieving family. [Variety]
• Bachelorette Jillian Harris stands by Ed Swiderski, but other continue to women talk about how shady he is, blah blah blah. [MSNBC]
• Blind item! "Which scorned reality star is in talks with a major R&B singer to have a faux relationship - just to improve her image?" [Gatecrasher]
• "Today some people in traffic tried to sell me a baby. A live human baby. I didn't know what to say. I said a little prayer for the kid. Wow. It all happend so fast. I was trying to figure out if they were serious, and i think when my reaction was not a good one, they just took off. I mean look. Chances are they were joking. The scary part is i really couldn't tell. Maybe i'm just one gullable fool (sic)." — Joel Madden, via Twitter. [News.com.au]
• "Ran into the people that tried to sell me their baby today on melrose.Told me to tell you all they were joking. I thought 10k was a bit high." — Joel Madden. [Twitter]
• "I learned 30 pages of dialogue in German and English and went to the audition dressed like the character. I killed it. I did everything except sleep with the director to get that part" — Diane Kruger, to Playboy on landing her role in Inglourious Basterds. [Page Six]
• "I got stuck being searched in Toronto, and she waited for me. I totally wasn't expecting to see her when I got through my Toronto search, and she was there, patiently waiting. Some people wouldn't have waited. That's all I'm saying." —Eric Bana on The Time Traveler's Wife costar Rachel McAdams. [USA Today]
• "What was I gonna do? I was worried about you. What if you'd been sent to jail or something and I had to alert the studio?" — Rachel McAdams to Eric Bana. [USA Today]
• "You know, in the old days it was very difficult to make movies 'cause you had to have 35 millimeter cameras, which were phenomenally expensive. Or you had to have rich parents that could send you to film school. Nowadays, anybody, any kid or young person with a desire to make films ... (has) access to this equipment. You have great video cameras and the quality's fantastic. You can make soundtracks and do visual effects. You can do very competent computer effects quite easily. There are no excuses anymore. If people really want to make movies, they can go out and do it. And I think we're going see in the next 20 or 30 years a real influx of creativity to the world of entertainment because I believe a lot in the young generation coming along ... the pop culture generation who now can grab these cameras and go make films with them." — director Peter Jackson. [Reuters]
• "I definitely got doughy. I started eating like crazy and drinking dark beer. Between meals on set, I'd eat a No. 1 Value Meal at McDonald's and then Doritos on top of it. It was absolute heaven." — Matt Damon, on gaining weight for his role in The Informant. [Gatecrasher]

• Jennifer Hudson gave birth to a baby boy named David Daniel Otunga Jr. after his father, David Otunga. Hudson's rep says, "The baby is beautiful and perfect. His parents are ecstatic." [Daily Mail]

• In 1999 at the age of 18, Channing Tatum performed in a Chippendales-style strip club called Male Encounter for $50 a night plus tips. You can check out his routine here: [Us]
• Plumbers are suing Usher for $2,335 because they claim he never paid them for remodeling his bathroom and installing a shampoo bowl. [TMZ]
• Tameka J. Raymond, wife of Usher, wrote an essay for the Huffington Post on stereotypes within the black community about light versus dark skin. She says she was appalled when a black women called Michele Obama unattractive because her skin is darker and writes, "In fact, I have read similar comments about myself that I am 'dark, aggressive, bossy and bitchy.' It has been stated that my husband should have been with a 'younger, more beautiful' woman." [Huffington Post]
• Security guards and paparazzi have been clashing for weeks on the Brooklyn set of The Bounty and the security guard assigned to protect Gerard Butler allegedly keyed a photographer's car this weekend. [N.Y. Post]
• Friends say Amy Winehouse is giving herself and her home a makeover to coincide with her comeback. "She's been obsessed lately with soft and floral furnishings, rose coloured sheets and fluffy pillows," says a friend, "She is particularly keen on peachy colorings." [The Sun]
• DEA agents raided a pharmacy in Las Vegas looking for evidence on Dr. Conrad Murray, Michael Jackson's doctor. [People]
• Whoopi Goldberg is selling her New York loft for $3.99 million so Sothebys has released a photo of her living room, which you can see here: [N.Y. Magazine]
• Here's the trailer for Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus, Heath Ledger's final film. [E!]
• Kelly Sott, the girlfriend of Michael Douglas' son Cameron Douglas was arrested yesterday for allegedly trying to smuggle him drugs in the courthouse. Law enforcement sources say she passed him an electric toothbrush with dime bags of heroin hidden in the handle. [NBC New York]
• Clay Aiken, who was recently dropped from RCA, has signed a record deal with Decca Records. He will release a new album in the first half of 2010. [Perez Hilton]
• You can listen to the 911 call made by RHOA's Kim Zolciak, in which she claims castmate NeNe Leakes choked her twice, at the link. Zolciak calls the dispatcher from behind "a Target shopping center" and says, "I was filming my show ... and I was choked by one of my cast members." [TMZ]
• Elizabeth Mitchell, who plays Juliet on Lost is leaving the show to film V, but she says we'll see Juliet, "pretty immediately, and then I'm not sure after that, but I think it will be satisfactory." [E!]
• Eric Bana, who got his start as a stand-up comic 20 years ago in Australia says, "Stand-up came out of three things: Frustration, necessity and arrogance. I didn't have a great career ahead of me in anything. Someone literally said to me, ‘You should try stand-up,' and took me to a venue. One guy onstage was pretty good, and the other three just sucked. I was like, ‘They're getting paid? I think I want to give this a try.'" [W]
• Tom Brady says of having a child out of wedlock, "That's not how you envisioned your life, that's not how you envisioned having children, but it happens. Life is not living in the suburbs with a white picket fence. That's not life. Somehow our American culture has made it out that that's what life needs to be-and that if it's not that, it's all screwed up. It's not. You go through life and you try the best you can." [Just Jared]

• Remember this report that Quentin Tarantino asked Brad Pitt to join the cast of Inglourious Basterds over some wine and some weed?

Quentin says: "That was Brad. He did the fabrication. He can take a Coke can and make it - functional." [NY Mag]

• Unsolicited uterus update: "Is Penelope Cruz pregnant?" Is she? [Page Six]
• Matt Damon has launched a new humanitarian project, Water.org, aimed at bringing clean water sources to nearly 890 million people at risk of disease. [Mirror]
• "Why I Waited Until 44 To Do My First Nude Scene, By The Proposal Star Sandra Bullock." Actually, she doesn't explain that, but she does say: "If you're naked and you're trying to be sexy — you don't really make as much money as if you're naked and you're funny." [Daily Mail]
• NYC Artist Dash Snow has died of a drug overdose; his brother, Maxwell Snow, dated Mary-Kate Olsen. [ONTD, Page Six]
• What will the Harry Potter stars do after the the movies are over? Daniel Radcliffe hopes to head back to the stage, but also "sleep"; Emma Watson will attend college, but would like to work with directors Alfonso Cuaron and Guillermo del Toro; Rupert Grint says: "I look forward to seeing what else is out there and to move on, really." [USA Today]
• In a poll, Hermione was voted the favorite Harry Potter character. And! "Some 51% thought [Emma] Watson would have the best post-Potter career, with a large majority (67 percent) approving the idea of her appearing naked." Eyeroll! [Reuters]
• Uh, the Vatican approves of the latest Harry Potter movie, since it makes the debate over good versus evil crystal clear. [Mirror]
• Madonna's boyfriend Jesus Luz is "resentful" that Guy Ritchie has been hanging around lately. But, you know, Madge and Guy were married for eight years and have three kids together. So. As for Jesus, a source says Madonna likes him because "He's pretty and she can boss him around." [Gatecrasher]
• Pity the Poles! Britney's Circus tour won't be stopping in Warsaw, due to a contractual dispute. [AP]
• Robert Redford got married on Saturday! The bride was a German Fräulein named Sibylle Szaggars; the ceremony took place at St. Catherine Church in Hamburg. Herzlichen Glückwunsch! [AP]
• Nicole Kidman's daughter, Sunday Rose, has turned one year old, and Nic and husband Keith Urban celebrated with a "little cake." Also, Keith says, "My wife made a beautiful video that covered her first year and we gave that to all the family." The kid is already a film star. [Daily Express]
• David Beckham has a new tattoo: The ring of roses around his arm has one flower for each year of marriage to wife Victoria. Sweet. [Daily Mail]
• Is Simon Cowell worth £100 million a year? That's what he's negotiating for to stay on American Idol. [Mirror]
• An X Factor fan lost her purse and Simon Cowell gave her a wad of his own cash. He can spare it! [EW]
• The LAPD is treating Michael Jackson's death as a homicide, and Dr. Conrad Murray is the focus of the investigation. [TMZ]
• Debbie Rowe's lawyer denies that she accepted $4 million to walk away from the custody battle. He says: "Ms. Rowe has not accepted — and will not accept — any additional financial consideration beyond the spousal support she and Michael Jackson personally agreed to several years ago." The New York Post printed a story claiming that Rowe had struck a deal with the Jackson family, and her lawyer is calling it "unequivocally false." [TMZ, CBS News, Reuters]
• Debbie Rowe sent emails to a friend which say: "I'm not going after custody. These kids are not mine. They were never mine. They were always Michael's. I was Michael's best friend." [Extra]
• Dr. Arnold Klein, Michael Jackson's dermatologist, is not fully cooperating with official requests for medical records. [TMZ]
• The DEA is trying to find out who supplied Michael Jackson with the powerful anesthesia Propofol. [TMZ]
• "A maker of the potent anesthetic propofol found in Michael Jackson's home has been contacted by federal officials investigating the pop star's death and has recalled tens of thousands of vials of the drug after two tainted lots sickened dozens of patients." [AP]
• "I never saw him on drugs. Not once. He deliberately did it away from us. He didn't want his family to know anything about that part of him." — Tito Jackson on Michael's drug use. [Mirror]
• Jack Wishna, a Las Vegas businessman who tried to organized comeback shows for Michael Jackson, says the pop star would move a bunch of mattresses on to the floor so he and all his kids could play, jump up and down and sleep in the same room. In addition, he would leave his Christmas trees up for about seven months. [E!]
• At this link, you'll find similarities and differences between real-life super agent Ari Emanuel and the character inspired by him, Entourage's Ari Gold. [Independent]
• Zooey Deschanel was supposed to headline a screening and Q&A of her film 500 Days Of Summer on Monday, but she'd already headed to Ireland where she's shooting Your Highness, a fantasy flick in which she plays a princess. Zooey sent a recorded statement in which she said, "Umm, I guess I should maybe answer a few questions preemptively. ... I did the movie because I liked it." [Observer]
• Vanessa Hudgens will be in a movie called Bandslam, playing a character named Sa5m, and — this is important — the 5 is silent. [People]
• Emily Blunt joins Matt Damon in Adjustment Bureau, a movie based on a Philip K. Dick short story. [Variety]
• Russell Brand: The voice of the Easter Bunny. In a live action/CGI family comedy called I Hop, to be released in March 2011. [Variety]
• Miley Cyrus will star in Wings, a movie based on a novel about a high-school girl who sprouts a pair of wings and learns that she is a fairy. [Variety]
• Hugh Jackman's signed on to appear in Avon Man, in which guys laid off from an auto dealership end up working as Avon salesmen. Jackman + makeup + comedy? We're in. [Variety]
• Usher has a summer camp, Camp New Look, that invites 130 children to spend two weeks in Atlanta learning about the business side of sports and entertainment. Hey says: "These kids come here and they're like 'Oh, wow … we're going to learn about entertainment!' But they leave engaged in life and knowing that, 'I can have a future outside of music.' That's what makes me most proud." [USA Today]
• Uh-oh. Robert De Niro is a victim of an art scam? He is gonna take you down. Take you down to Chinatown. [Reuters]
• Hmm, I didn't know that Rashida Jones was dating President Obama's speechwriter, Jon Favreau. Where have I been? [Page Six]
• Q-Tip has inked a deal to publish his memoir, titled Industry Rules. Is one chapter titled "I Left My Wallet In El Segundo"? [mediabistro.com]
• Interesting piece about Angie Dickinson, who starred in the 1974-78 NBC series Police Woman, for which she earned a Golden Globe award and Emmy nominations as L.A. police officer Sgt. Pepper Anderson. The show paved the way for future female-driven cop shows. [LA Times]
• Congrats To Joey McIntyre and his wife, who are expecting their second child in December. [People]
• Some guy was trying to sue Janet Jackson, claiming that her bodyguards beat him up in a club, but the case was dismissed due to a lack of evidence. [Goathamist]
• Aerosmith bass player Tom Hamilton is recovering from non-invasive surgery and will miss some tour dates. [Reuters]
• Jane Fonda and music producer Richard Perry: It's on. [Page Six]
• Blind item! "Which grungy young starlet's idea of a good time is getting stoned with her ex-hippie parents?" [Gatecrasher]
• "When you have three kids, you've got to take your opportunities when they come. In a limo, on the way to the Academy Awards this year, Will started looking at me in this way that drives me wild. We started kissing passionately, and the next thing I knew, well, let's just say we missed the red carpet and I ended up with almost no makeup on." — Jada Pinkett Smith spills about her sex life. [Page Six]
• "[She] wipes the floor with me every time I play her." — Daniel Radcliffe, who says Emma Watson is a pro at table tennis. [The Sun]
• "I respect criticism. But I know more about film than most of the people writing about me. Not only that, I'm a better writer than most of the people writing about me. And I can write film criticism better than most of the people writing about me. [My goal was] to get the biggest standing ovation of the festival, and I got it [...] Sometimes it's your time to be Elvis, and that was my time." — Quentin Tarantino, on the mixed reviews of Inglourious Basterds and its reception at Cannes. [NY Mag]
• "I'm a trained astronaut, and it's my time to go." — Lance Bass is still hoping to head to space. [Gatecrasher]
• "I don't have his number, so haven't spoken to him. But I can safely say that his insisting that girls would choose me over him that they would not. That they do not. He is the much prettier and can be much more charming. And he can do that thing of being sultry and sexy." — Daniel Radcliffe, on Robert Pattinson. [The Daily Beast]
• "Although my grief over Michael could not be any deeper, I am not on suicide watch as some of the cheaper 'rags' would have you believe." — Elizabeth Taylor. [CNN]

Although, this was weird:

It was part of some montage that ran on the jumbo screen.

Hey, did you know that Michael Jackson is the reason that Obama was elected into office?

Did he even ever vote? Jehovah's Witnesses usually don't. (According to Prince.) Sharpton also said, "It was Michael Jackson that brought blacks and whites and Asians and Latinos together." Literally, all I could think was "What about Native Americans?" This dance was in my head all weekend:

Maya Angelou wrote a long-ass poem about Michael and then didn't even go. She had Queen Latifah read it.

Berry Gordy was the first to get up there and really eulogize Michael. He talked about the later singer's good and bad times, and then implied that we're supposed to start calling Michael "The Greatest Entertainer That Ever Lived" from now on. I don't know…"King of Pop" is a lot catchier. And easier.

Magic Johnson talked about Kentucky Fried Chicken.

And Al Sharpton wanted his three kids to know that their father wasn't strange.

Brooke Shields gave a touching eulogy in which she pretty much blew her cover as his beard.

She also said that he was "undoubtedly perched on a crescent moon." But I highly doubt that if he is on the moon that he's "perched." He's moonwalking. Doye.

Then a Congresswoman got up there and ranted and raved for the longest time about the legal system.

As for the performances, there was the big singalong to "We Are the World," for which family and close friends got on stage with a bunch of nobodies holding the mics.

There was also the good:
Stevie Wonder

Usher: I didn't like how "showy" he was, singing to the casket and stuff.

The bad:
Mariah didn't sound good.

Jennifer Hudson and the Arm-Motion People. She sounded great, but what is the deal with interpretive dancing? Also, I totally thought they were singing the song from Working Girl at first.

And the ugly:
John Mayer and his O faces.

Wesley Snipes

Earvin "Magic" Johnson; Miko Brando

Martin Luther King III; Brooke Shields

Jennifer Hudson; Usher

Chris Brown

Mariah Carey

Joel Madden; Nicole Richie; Lionel Richie

Queen Latifah

Mickey Rooney

Smokey Robinson

Al Sharpton; Louis Farrakhan

Lionel Richie; Mike Tyson

Stevie Wonder

The Kardashian Klan

Corey Feldman

[Images via Getty.]

And so are we. (Well, I am.) From now until the service ends, I'll be liveblogging the circus (and it will be a circus, or more literally, the warm-up act for the circus: the Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey circus will be opening tomorrow at the same venue). For those who want to "follow" along but are unsure which channel to tune into — ABC, NBC, CBS, Fox, MSNBC, CNN, CNN Headline News, Fox News Channel, E!, TV Guide, TV One, MTV, VH1, VH1 Classic, VH1 Soul, BET, Telemundo or Univision — you can get a breakdown of the coverage here.

3:55 I'm closing the show with this:



3:40 Paris closed the show by saying that she had "the best father."

3:35 Back-to-back singalong of "We Are the World" and "Heal the World."
Paris, Prince, and Blanket joined in.



3:30 What the hell is this guy's deal?



3:25 Shaheen Jafargholi is singing "Who's Loving You." Anyone else think it's weird that an unrelated prepubescent boy is there?



3:15 Usher sang "Gone Too Soon." He's the first to get down and actually sing to the casket. He cried at the end and it was touching, but the thunderstorm warning in NYC kept fucking up the mood. (Video to come.)



3:00 Martin Luther King Jr.'s daughter said, "If faces can smile…"
We imagined Michael's response, "Faces can smile, silly!"



2:59 Jermaine is singing "Smile."

2:56 Brooke Shields is basically talking about having Michael Jackson as a gay best friend. I like it though. It's really touching. "When we were together, we were two little kids, having fun. We never collaborated together or performed together." But seriously, she is ubiquitous.

2:45 People are chanting "Michael, Michael, Michael!" And then John Mayer stepped out instead. He's performing "Human Nature." But without singing—like Kenny G-style. This will be playing in dentist office waiting rooms around the country soon.



Video to come. Lots of "O" faces.

2:39 He just told Michael's kids, "There was nothing strange about your daddy. What was strange was what your daddy had to deal with." That got a standing ovation.



I think Blanket has an MJ doll with him.



2:36 Al Sharpton is being himself…loud.

2:28 The arm-motion choir behind Jennifer Hudson gives MJ two thumbs up.



They aren't signers right? I took American Sign Language as my foreign language in college, and this is not what it looked like:



2:12 Stevie Wonder is performing "Never Dreamed You'd Leave in Summer." It's pretty awesome. Video to come.

2:08 Now there's a montage of dancing and songs.

2:07 Mariah singing "I'll Be There."



2:04 Berry Gordy is giving the eulogy. He said mostly glowing things but also, "He had some bad, bad times and made some questionable decisions…" But he ended with, "I think he's simply the greatest entertainer that ever lived." That brought the house down.

2:03 The Jackson men are wearing matching suits and sparkly gloves.



1:55 Lionel Richie is singing now. It's a religious song I don't recognize.

1:52 Queen Latifah is reading a poem that Maya Angelou wrote for the occasion called "We Had Him."

1:49 Mimi:



Video to come: Her voice sounded…not great. But Trey Lorenz was there!

1:43 The casket:



1:40 The pastor giving the sermon keeps peppering his speech with song titles ("Remember the Time," "Heal the World," etc.).

1:38 Someone screamed, "I love you, Michael!" And the crowd cheered. Then someone else screamed, "We ALL love you, Michael!" And then the crowd cheered again.

1:36 A choir is singing (the same one that did back up on "Man in the Mirror") and the stage is set up just like a church. There are rolling clouds behind the windows.



1:25 I like Coop's Rhythm Nation-style mic.



1:19 Martin Bashir is on ABC talking about how he feels demonized for his documentary Living with Michael Jackson. People are so hung up on this demon talk.



1:15 OK, now it's totally dark and silent:



And it's going on for a long time. None of the anchors on any of the stations know what order anything will happen.

1:13 Smokey Robinson is reading statements written by people who couldn't attend, like Diana Ross and Nelson Mandela.

1:06 Informal poll:
What will Stevie Wonder sing?
A.) "Never Dreamed You'd Leave in Summer"
B.) "You Are the Sunshine of My Life"
C.) "Part-time Lover"

1:04 Informal poll:
What will Mariah sing?
A.) "I'll Be There"
B.) "One Sweet Day"
C.) "Bye Bye"

I hope it's "Bye Bye" but that she changes the lyrics up to include: "This is for my people who just lost somebody/ A best friend/ An icon/ A dancer/ [fill in the blank]…"

1:02: The service should be starting any minute now.

1:00 Some of the pages of the memorial service program are online now. Missing: the first page, with LaToya's message. I wanna know what she said!

12:56 This girls is pumped about seeing MJ's coffin.



12:50 You guys, guess who's gonna be there!



12:43 E! is approaching this like it's red carpet coverage, but instead of former models or comedians hosting, they have serious journalists, like the guy who used to work at Us and had his own sex scandal.



12:27 Channel Hopping:
MTV: Playing videos in between Sway and Kim Stolz talking at the Staples Center. Also, the network ID marker has turned this into a black ribbon event. Elizabeth Taylor is gonna need a Girl Scout sash to hold the rainbow of badges she's amassing.



VH1: Showing the same packages as MTV.
BET: Kevin from the first Real World is talking:



Fox News: Following the casket on screen as it drives to the memorial.
Telemundo: Same as Fox News, but sexier.
E!: Longest Proactive commercial ever. It seems like they're front loading with the ads so they don't have to cut away.

12:08 Now it's being reported that the mood inside the Staples Center will be "somber," with no "pomp and circumstance."

11:53 Check out the program for the memorial service:



Also, CNN will not let up on talking about Michael "overcoming his demons." They must've said it like 20 times already. It makes this picture—from the program—have a lot more meaning. Actually, I don't care how big of a deal "Thriller" was. Zombies are too scary for a funeral.



11:45 CNN said that MJ's coffin will be placed in the empty space between these flower arrangements at the foot of the stage:



That means he'll have front-row access to Mariah's performance, possibly even an up-skirt view.



11:30 This is the scene outside the Staples Center right now. It's a little reminiscent of Lollapalooza. All it needs is a game of hacky sack and an herbal ecstasy kiosk.



11:38 OK, so now CNN is saying that the body will be there. The family is bringing it with them in a procession, and then another private service will be held after the Staples Center memorial.

11:27 The Jackson family is at the Forest Lawn cemetery right now for a private service. Helicopters are swirling overhead, grabbing footage. So is his body going to be at the Staples Center or not? Are they going to drag him all over L.A. today?

11:18 Has anyone heard from Oprah, regarding MJ's death? I'm curious to know what she thinks.



11:04 The View has not been preempted, as of yet. Barbara Walters just called in from L.A. and said that the Jackson family has asked her to sit with them at the service.

Pre-show: We've never experienced a goodbye like this for an entertainer before, and we may never again. We've also never seen people so psyched for a funeral/memorial. Last night, Dateline featured the excitement of some lucky fans who managed to score tickets for the Staples Center event through the public lottery.

• Lindsay Lohan is being sued by a Florida chemist named Jennifer Sunday, who claims the actress stole the formula for Sevin Nyne tanning mist.

Lindsay says she co-created the formula with Lorit Simon, a Las Vegas businesswoman who air-brushes tans for celebrities. But Simon had signed a confidentiality agreement in January with Sunday's company. By the way, Sevin Nyne is named after Lindsay's lucky numbers. [St. Petersburg Times]

• The Real Housewives Of New York want more cash before they'll return to the show next season. We're talking six figures, a clothing allowance and money for hair and makeup. Bravo is responding by interviewing replacements, haha. [Gatecrasher]
• Are Countess LuAnn de Lesseps and Count Alex on the verge of a reconciliation? [Page Six]
• "Rihanna's Risqué Fashion Choice Of Pasties Ensures No One Looks At Her Hairstyle." [NY Daily News]
• In a ceremony yesterday, Prince William was made an honorary barrister. He says: "I play football, rugby and water polo, not very well, but particularly pride myself in being a quite magnificent armchair centre-back at football and flanker at rugby... and now you have made me a barrister — I promise not to practise, except for the odd speeding ticket." [Telegraph]
• Barack Obama on Michael Jackson: "There are certain figures in our popular culture that just capture peoples' imagination, and in death they become even larger. I have to admit that it's also fed by a 24/7 media that is insatiable." [CBS News]
• The Michael Jackson memorial is today, and Mariah Carey, Stevie Wonder, Usher and Lionel Richie will be taking part. [Reuters]
• Debbie Rowe, biological mother of Michael's children, will not attend. [NY Post]
• Will Michael Jackson's son, Prince Michael Jackson, perform today?!?!?! [MSNBC Scoop]
• The Jackson family was at Forest Lawn Cemetery in Los Angeles last night, viewing the body. [TMZ, People]
• Michael Jackson's mother, Katherine, has turned his bedroom into a shrine, with life-size wax models from Madame Tussauds and his old report cards. [The Sun]
• Word on Michael Jackson's kids — who have not been seen since his death — is that they are with their grandmother, Katherine, and are "doing as OK as can be expected." [MSNBC Scoop]
• Uh-oh: A Liz Taylor-Michael Jackson drug link? This piece details "How Taylor's pill habit fed Jackon's addiction, how the two shared the same doctor, and the warnings they both received." [The Daily Beast]
• In this interview, Brooke Shields — who first met Michael Jackson when she was 13 — says as Michael grew up, "the more asexual he became to me." She also says: "He was like a little kid who talked about the bases - what first base was, what second base was," Shields said. "It sounded very odd to the outside, I can imagine, but to the inside, to someone who's never really left his bubble, you can understand how he would be curious." [AP via Rolling Stone]
• Robin Leach has a blog (!?!) where he writes: "Just 48 hours before his death, Michael Jackson was 'in a high state of stress and emotional drama, fearing that he would never be able to complete the 50-concert run in London, and it would kill him.'" [Vegas Deluxe]
• Ugh, every funny or crazy thing the poor man said is now coming out as a headline. For instance: "Michael Jackson Wanted To Clone Himself." [Mirror]
• In a police report from 2004, five doctors are named as continually prescribing drugs for Michael Jackson. [The Wrap]
• Congressman Peter King — who ranted about MJ over the weekend — has more to say. He calls the coverage of the singer's death an "orgy of glorification." [TMZ]
• Michael Jackson news = huge traffic for TMZ. [AP]
• When Megan Fox went to Michael Bay's house to audition for Transformers, "He made her wash his Ferrari while he filmed her." Apparently this footage is now missing. [Page Six]
• Madonna is in talks to perform on Simon Cowell's X Factor show; Lady GaGa and Rihanna may also make appearances. [The Sun]
• By the by: Madonna has plans to do a concert in Warsaw, Poland on a day celebrating the Virgin Mary; Lech Walesa calls this "Satanic provocation." [Reuters]
• The Office's Jenna Fischer: Engaged! [People]
• A Brit paper claims Kelly Osbourne called Lady GaGa a "butterface": Kelly responds, "I have a big mouth and that's no secret… BUT when words are being put into my mouth and things are being printed that I did not say it really makes me really mad. I am a huge fan of Lady GaGa. If anything i'm slightly jealous of her wardrobe and I am definitely in no position to be calling anyone a butter face." [Perez]
• Diddy's White Party is being called "B-list" because Tila Tequila, Tara Reid and Tom Green were there, but what about Ashton Kutcher, Demi Moore, Russell Brand, Jonah Hill and Lindsay Lohan? [Page Six]
• Twilight star Kellan Lutz and 90210's AnnaLynne McCord are so totally on, but don't want people to know. Luckily, you don't even care, do you? [Page Six]
• Scores, a "gentleman's club" in New York City, has offered Heidi Montag $25,000 to strip. [PopCrunch]
• Paula Abdul calls the American Idol panel a dysfunctional family of sorts." To wit: "I'm the nurturing mom, Simon's the disapproving dad, and Randy's the cool brother." Oh, and forgotten stepsister, whatshername? [AP]
• Here is a sentence from a story about Agyness Deyn's love life: "Agyness Deyn is now all loved up with cheeky Scouse musician Miles Kane from The Rascals, who is also one half of The Last Shadow Puppets." Got it? [The Sun]
• Well, this should be insane: Kathy Griffin will host Comedy Central's roast on Joan Rivers. "I will be roasting Joan with more gentleness and tenderness than her latest chemical peel," quips Kath. [Variety]
• Bruce Willis' Idaho ski lodge burned down earlier this year, and the actor is planning on rebuilding bigger and better. [USA Today]
• Ooh la la: Kristin Scott Thomas will star in a production of A Little Night Music on the stage in Paris. [Variety]
• My übercrush Benicio Del Toro visited a prison in Puerto Rico Monday, telling inmates in a theater group: "I believe everyone needs a second chance… I am here to help reaffirm that as long as there is life, you can still help society in some way, you can improve yourself." [AP]
• Even though Winona Ryder has said a Heathers sequel was "in the works," the film's director, Michael Lehmann, says: "Winona brings it up every once in a while and [writer] Dan Waters and I will joke about it but as far as I know there's no script and no plans to do the sequel. I never thought it made sense to see a sequel to a movie which took place in a specific time and specific place and in which many of the characters got killed off." Well. Fuck me gently with a chain saw. [Daily Express]
• Anna Kournikova was seen with a huge diamond ring on THAT finger but tried to hide it and refused to elaborate. [AP, Page Six]
• Blind item! "Damage control! Which hard-partying actor rushed back to his local AA chapter when he was caught drinking, but is actually still on the sauce?" [Gatecrasher]
• "Quidditch is right up there with the least fun things I've done in Harry Potter. It's not a pleasant experience, it does hurt quite a lot and it's not something I would rush back to." — Daniel Radcliffe. [Telegraph]
• "I've had a cross tattooed over the tattoo I got of his name. I won't get his name removed because he was part of my life but I just want to get on with the divorce now." — Katie "Jordan" Price on estranged hubs Peter Andre. [The Sun]
• "I would like to think I haven't been influenced by him too much just by playing him for so long. I am thrilled to have this in my life, but it is separate from my life, you know? It's nice to be called Dan. And actually I started correcting people now. You do feel like a bit of an idiot doing that, but at the same time, in the long run it is better for us. I know it's better for me." — Daniel Radcliffe, who would like to remind you that he is not actually Harry Potter. [LA Times]

• One of the hazards of dating a rock star: When, mid-fight, you want to throw some of his stuff into a pool, there's a slight risk that he might have unreleased, non-backed-up new songs among his personal effects. [Mirror]

• "I used to bring pies to the office," says amateur baker Peter Som. "I can't eat them all myself." How did that dude ever get fired? [WWD]
• Thus spake Lacroix: "Don't tell anyone, because I'm not allowed to do this, but we absolutely are going to have a show in mid-July, during Fashion Week –- and it won't be a funeral: it'll be a fightback." Since Christian Lacroix's fashion house, owned by the U.S.-based Falic group, entered bankruptcy, the fate of the couture show has been in serious doubt. "It can't cost us a single Euro to put this show on, because I'm not having my workers lose a penny from their pockets, but so far, it looks like thanks to other people's kindness — friends and suppliers working for free — it might happen. I can't stand the idea that people think I am to blame [for the bankruptcy] but to a certain extent I am paying for not having done what everyone else did, with their logos and It-bags. I never went down that route." Lacroix has been working for free for 18 months, and is owed 1.2 million Euros in back pay. [Telegraph]
• Model Lily Cole earned a first in her end of year art history exams at Cambridge, one of only three students to receive the top grade. [Mirror]
• Yigal Azrouel, whose relationship with Katie Lee Joel is rumored to have brought about the end of the latter's marriage to Billy Joel, romances a lot of ladies. (He is an attractive, straight man working in fashion. Duh.) One rumor alleges Azrouel sleeps with editors at magazines to further his career. [P6]
• Chanel and Burberry model Emma Watson is said to be launching a clothing line for children and teens to benefit Unicef. [Hindustan Times]
• Usher says his men's fragrance really "represents the growth I've had in the last two years." VIP, which he's set to launch this September, is a "tool of engagement for seduction...made for a man but for women to enjoy." [WWD]
• Uh-oh. Sales of perfumes fell 6% overall in 2008, and 7% during the first quarter of 2009. Estée Lauder's fragrance division said the last three months of 2009 saw sales fall 20%, and another perfume company executive said anonymously that he believed sales for this year were down 15-20% because distributors are not restocking after selling to retailers. [NYTimes]
• "I don't want to do 'Adele by Adele' perfume!" says Adele. [LATimes]
• A judge refused to dismiss gourmet butter distributor Clint Arthur's lawsuit against Louis Vuitton for selling off-cuts of fabric as art prints. [P6]
• You really know you've hit the event horizon of aspirational shopping when someone from a company that makes plastic shoes describes her products as "affordable luxury." [LATimes]
• Robin Givhan at the Washington Post sees in H&M's just-announced collaboration with Jimmy Choo the end of luxury as we know it. "There's something about cheap Jimmy Choo shoes that doesn't feel right," writes the critic. "Women's shoes have been sold on a centuries-old mythology that makes the discovery that Jimmy Choo can produce a desirable pair of shoes for less than $50 as jarring as when Dorothy pulled back the curtain on the Wizard." [WaPo]
• Actually, the cheapest offering from Jimmy Choo's H&M collection will retail at around 40 Euros, or $55. The 12 women's styles and four men's models will range in price from there up to 200 Euros, or $138. Bags will cost up to 200 Euros. It all goes on sale in select H&M stores on November 14. [WWD]
• Cool looking Missoni-printed Converse Chuck Taylors will also be a thing you can buy, starting next summer. [WWD]
• Prince William's girlfriend Kate Middleton is, according to rumor, sitting on an offer for a year-long internship at American Vogue from Anna Wintour. Middleton, a former fashion buyer, could take her pick of either working in New York or Los Angeles. [Hindu]
• Jason Wu anticipates $4 million in sales this year and sees a men's wear division in his future. The 26-year-old enjoys spending his Sundays browsing at the Strand and playing poker with a $20 buy-in, "just enough to take it seriously but not enough to feel bad when you lose." [NYTimes]
• The Fall Calvin Klein Collection and CK Calvin Klein ads have leaked — they feature Monika "Jac" Jagaciak and Jourdan Dunn and Sigrid Agren, respectively. The Collection campaign was shot by David Sims and CK by Craig McDean. [Fashionologie]
• Isaac Mizrahi is opening a store for his namesake label in August. It'll be 1500 square feet and located on the Upper East Side. [WWD]
• Cashmere prices have fallen so drastically that many herders of cashmere goats have had to sell their animals for meat. Orders for winter cashmere sweaters from the West have fallen by up to 30%. And get ready for a cold season: the garments being made are using less cashmere. "They are too small — half the breast is outside the sweater," said one factory's sales manager. [NYTimes]
• Jil Sander is on the comeback trail in a big way. The German designer, who lost the use of her name to Prada when the Italian company bought out her house and fired her, has just announced a fine jewelry collaboration with Damiani. This is in addition to her new position as a creative director of Uniqlo. [WWD]

• Lily Allen is suing The Sun over an article in which the British newspaper quoted her as calling Victoria Beckham a "monster" and insulting several other celebrities. Allen says she never made the comments. [The Guardian]

• Christine Prody is shopping a tell-all book about her 13-year relationship with O.J. Simpson called Spellbound: My Life With O.J. Simpson. She claims that he forced her to have two abortions, threatened to kill her, and compared her to his murdered ex-wife Nicole. [Newser]
• Michael Jackson has filed legal papers asking a judge to throw out a judgment against him. Jackson's former publicist Raymone Bain got a default judgment in her lawsuit against Jackson for allegedly failing to pay her because he never responded to the suit. MJ says he was never served with the papers. Bain counters that she tried to serve him, but a security guard at his home told the process server "Get the fuck out of here!" [TMZ]
• A Massachusetts teacher saved Tom Brady's life after he fell into Boston's Charles River while kayaking with Gisele Bundchen. Robin Leeds was on the river in a motorboat when she saw that Brady was in the water. "I actually asked him why he fell in. He said he was racing one of his friends," said Leeds, who found Brady "really friendly, really appreciative that we fished him out of the Charles." [People]
• Sources claim Gisele Bunchen is pregnant, and that she's "ecstatic." The source adds, "Gisele will be an excellent mother." [People]
• Jennifer Aniston had dinner last night with Bradley Cooper, her He's Just Not That Into You costar. Cooper says they're not dating, but TMZ has decided that they are. [TMZ]
• An anonymous source insists, "It was a date. She is taking it slow. She is obviously looking for love, but is not about to rush into anything." [People]
• TLC has released a new clip from Monday's episode of Jon and Kate Plus 8, which makes it pretty clear that they'll announce they are divorcing. Kate Gosselin says, "We haven't really known where we were going but we've been dealing with this a long time." In a separate interview, Jon Gosselin says, "It just got worse and worse and worse. And with all the tabloids and all that, it just made it even worse." [People]
• Jon Gosselin was hunting for an apartment in New York City and checked out Trump Place. "[Jon] has been going back and forth to New York a lot" says a source. [People]
• A source says that Katie Lee Joel, 27, is divorcing Billy Joel, 60, because of their age difference. "It really was just an age thing," said a friend. "She loves the city, she loves to go out and have fun and he prefers to stay at home. The age difference didn't seem to be a big deal seven years ago [when they met], but it has become one as they got older... They just grew apart." [N.Y. Post]
• California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger sent Senate President Pro Tem Darrel Steinberg a metal sculpture of bull testicles as a joke after saying that lawmakers needed to make bold decisions during budget negotiations. Steinberg returned the sculpture with a note about the seriousness of the negotiations. [MSNBC]
• At the Tribeca Barnes & Noble last night, a staffer said 1,000 people showed up for Lauren Conrad's book signing. She did not actually read from L.A. Candy and would only sign her name, not a personalized message. [N.Y. Magazine]
• T.R. Knight released a statement confirming that he's leaving Grey's Anatomy. He said, "Leaving Grey's Anatomy was not an easy decision for me to make. I am extremely grateful to have had the opportunity to play this character and will miss my fellow cast and crew very much. I continue to wish them the very best, and wholeheartedly thank all of the fans who have supported me and the show with such passion and enthusiasm." [Entertainment Weekly]
• Camilla Belle says even though they were seen out on what the tabloids called a date, she and Robert Pattinson are just friends. "We have a big group of friends and we saw each other last night," she said.. "[Pattinson] is very cool – a very nice guy." [People]
• Stephen Baldwin has quit I'm A Celebrity... Get Me Out Of Here! for unknown reasons. [Perez Hilton]
• A federal judge has set July 15 as the deadline by which Morgan Freeman and the woman suing him for the car crash they were in must submit settlement proposals. [Yahoo]
• Susan Boyle has skipped two performances of the Britain's Got Talent tour this week. Her publicist said, "She would love to be able to perform every single evening but she is aware of what she can and can't do. I feel sorry for her because she doesn't want to let people down but also she needs to have a rest." He stressed that the reason she cancelled was not because she missed her cat Pebbles, as the tabloids reported. [E!]
• Susan Boyle pulled out of another show today and reportedly had a screaming fit and needed to be calmed down by the show's organizers. [The Daily Mail]
• Joe Jonas announced that Nick Jonas and Miley Cyrus are back together on Larry King Live last night. When Larry asked if Joe's girlfriend is as famous as Nick's, Joe said, "I don't think anybody is as famous as Miley Cyrus." Nick seems a little upset and says, "It's nice to have reconnected with her. For a little while there, we had not been as reconnected as we are now." [People]
• Kelly Rutherford and her estranged husband Daniel Giersch have agreed that he will give her lawyer his visa and visa application within the next week. It seems she is worried that he may try to leave the country with their two children, Hermes and Helena. [TMZ]
• Oprah Winfrey is taking her entire staff and their families on a Mediterranean cruise. The cruise ship will stop in Spain, Italy, Turkey, Greece and Malta and Oprah is paying for their transportation, food, drinks and activities at port stops. [The Chicago Sun-Times]
• After watching the girls at the Oprah Winfrey Leadership Academy in South Africa put on a show for the school's annual arts festival, Oprah said she was overwhelmed by the girls' talent and that they are "living the vision" she had for them. [USA Today]
• Usher shot a new ad for the Body By Milk campaign and said he now feels he's arrived. He said in order to be a Hollywood icon, "You've got to do things like win Oscars and Grammys, but you're nothing if you don't have a milk ad!" [People]
• The Rachel Zoe Project returns to Bravo on August 25. [The L.A. Times]
• Louisiana movie investor Jay Dykes Jr. has agreed to dismiss Madonna from a lawsuit that accuses the film production company she founded, Maverick Films, of failing to repay investor's loans. [AP]
• Julianne Hough will star opposite Chace Crawford in the remake of Footloose. [Variety]
• Heather Locklear's publicist says Heather and Jack Wagner are not engaged. [UPI]
• Michael Bay says if there is another Transformers movie he won't direct it, because he's sick of getting bad reviews. "I need to do something totally divergent, something without any explosions," he said. "It's easy to go shoot an art movie in a winery in the South of France. But people have no idea how hard it is to create something like Transformers. They (the critics) review me before they've even seen the movie." [IMDB]
• Paul McCartney's book about the adventures of a squirrel, High in the Clouds will be made into an animated film. McCartney will write new music for the film. [The Star]
• PETA sent a letter to Phish asking the band to change their name to "Sea Kittens" for a June concert in Wisconsin. "If Phish became Sea Kittens and the band's legions of fans started calling fish 'sea kittens,' fewer of these gentle animals would be violently killed for food, painfully hooked for 'sport,' or cruelly confined to aquariums," says Ashley Byrne, PETA's Sea Kittens campaign coordinator. "Whether they are catfish or cats, bass or basset hounds, all animals deserve lives free from needless pain." [PETA.org]
• Peter Andre broke down and cried as he greeted his mother at the airport in Cyprus. Meanwhile his estranged wife Katie Price was seen out at a nightclub with Anthony Lowther for the third night in a row. [The Daily Mail]
• NYU alum Todd Phillips did a Q&A a the school and showed his film The Hangover but the University was annoyed by a story he told about claiming university equipment was stolen and ripping off an insurance company. The school has issued a statement saying, "we were appalled by a story in which he made light of committing insurance fraud as a student. Whether or not this story is true, we assure you we never have, and never will, condone behavior that does not respect people, property, and legal documents." [N.Y. Magazine]
• Holly Madison was turned away from Body English at Las Vegas' Hard Rock Hotel & Casino because she showed up with a group of Playmates and one of the women wasn't 21. [People]
• Though Megan Fox says she is "what you would call single," she was spotted having dinner with ex-fiance Brian Austin Green. [The Sun]
• So You Think You Can Dance judge Mary Murphy said she doesn't know if the rumors that Katie Holmes will appear ont he show are true or not, but "If it is true, I'm going to be one of the happiest campers around, let me tell ya! I just wish I knew!" [People]
• New York Jets safety Kerry Rhodes plays a police officer in Lady Gaga's video for "Paparazzi." "The shoot was ridiculous!" he says. "Everywhere you turned there was a dead body – not real! – a really big horse-looking dog, and a half-naked model, which was cool." [People]
• While performing his song "Only Women Bleed" onstage, Alice Cooper pretends to beat his 27-year-old daughter, Calico. "Obviously people have talked [about it being weird] that 'she's prancing around half naked on the stage,'" Calico said. "I'm like 'there's a point to that, it's like Shakespeare, it's painting a picture of stuff that's reality in a lot of people's lives." She added that she's looked into the audience and seen, "everybody from little housewives down there crying their eyes out, to big biker guys wiping big tears away. [Domestic abuse is] a heavy subject and I think it takes a brave guy to not just write about it, but write a scene and write a sketch that's uncomfortable." [CBS News]
• Bethenny Frankel of The Real Housewives of New York wrote a lengthy blog post once again about The Real Housewives of New Jersey. She wrote: "And lastly, as for Dina blogging that TV isn't just for money and that I should apologize by donating "some of that Skinnygirl money" to her charity, here is my response: Dina, I happily donate my time and money to the Children's Tumor Foundation, Camp Confidence and the Step Up Women's Network, just to name a few. Dina, for you to insinuate that you did this reality show for charity, I will quote my friend Kathy Griffin and say, "That's a bag of bulls—t." [E!]
• Evan Rachel Wood says she's going to be on True Blood as a lesbian vampire. She said, "I actually put in a phone call to [series creator] Alan Ball and said, 'I love the show, I'm obsessed with it, seen every episode; if there's ever a part, keep me in mind.' It looks like I'm going to be in the last two episodes as the Vampire Queen of Louisiana. I've been watching The Lost Boys and my favorite vampire movies. It's a lot harder than I imagined. I'm working pretty hard on the script. But I don't think I'll really be able to find the character until I'm in wardrobe and I'm in fangs." She said she'll be in a sex scene, "But it's with a girl. That's all I'm going to say... I don't think vampires are really gay or straight. I think she just prefers women." [Newsweek]