World's Biggest Sea Turtle Crashes Beach Wedding to Lay Eggs

A beach wedding in St. Croix was derailed when an unexpected guest dragged herself out of the depths of the sea and made Brianna's special day ALL ABOUT HER. It was an enormous, majestic leatherback sea turtle—the largest species of turtle in the world—and girl was just looking for quiet place to lay her eggs without… » 5/21/14 3:40pm 5/21/14 3:40pm

Sea Turtle With Prosthetic Limbs Finds Joy Again, and So Can You!

Maybe "joy" is overstating it, since having your front limbs mauled by sharks is a tough thing to get over. But thanks to the perseverance of a group of researchers at the University of Tokyo, loggerhead sea turtle Yu Chan can swim again after a shark attack. 27 prosthesis models later (see? Perseverance), she's… » 2/22/13 6:45pm 2/22/13 6:45pm

Turtle Roadkill Experiment Conclusively Proves That Humans are Assholes

I've been saying this for years, and nobody ever listens to me: people, en masse, are shit. Like, actual shit. Believe me, I'd love to be wrong about this, but here's a new experiment that verifies my theory. It takes a turtle seven or eight years to reproduce, and a female turtle who lives 50 years may lay over 100… » 12/29/12 12:30pm 12/29/12 12:30pm

Yertle the Turtle Deemed 'Too Political' for Fragile Canadian…

A British Columbia elementary school teacher was scolded after she included a quote from Dr. Seuss's Yertle the Turtle in materials she brought to a meeting with school management. The story, school officials warned, was "too political" and would not be acceptable in the classroom, in the interests of "shielding the… » 4/26/12 4:30pm 4/26/12 4:30pm

10 Things You May Have Missed On TV This Week

In this week's compilation of pop culture crap: Carla Hall almost vomits on The Chew; a dress made from ladies underwear; "Brogurt"; and Regis Philbin tries out a new job alongside Beavis and Butthead. » 12/02/11 7:00pm 12/02/11 7:00pm

God bless you, Jimmy Kimmel, for thinking up this stellar idea for King Philbin to move onto next. Watching…