Jezebel 
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New York, 11:12 AM
Fri Dec 4
72 posts in the last 24 hours
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10/09/09
10/09/09
Help folks! I know I must be missing something...
10/09/09
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10/09/09
You know, real racism exists in the world. Let's target that and stop getting outraged over a joke that was misinterpreted in your minds. That's what I don't get either. Tracie meant nothing offensive but it's the commenters who made it something offensive. Who's thoughts and racial associations are in the wrong here, exactly?
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10/09/09
A) That lady looks like she's taking a poo.
B) People are going to think this is racist.
10/09/09
@snugbug: It's fine to be greyed-out because most of our comments weren't really adding much, and just made it look like a shitstorm. I don't think it's personal. It doesn't affect commenting status, and I'm pretty sure if I wanted to, I could approve my own greyed-out comments if I felt they really *must* be seen by everyone.
10/09/09
Look, I said from jump that I gave you the benefit of the doubt re: your intent. But regardless of the intent the comparison was clearly offensive to many.
You don't make casual jokes about big noses or being cheap around Jews. You don't make casual jokes about emotional instability or weakness around women...because these are memes that have long had strong racist and sexist implications. The same applies here.
All you needed to say was "sorry, this is what I meant" and try to understand the reaction to your comment (because this is not about you).
Ending your explanation with a flippant "Duh" and getting alll in a huff because someone was uncomfortable with something you wrote is a typical assertion of white privilege that just belittles the perspective of POC. It's also just plain childish and rude.
I expect more responsible journalism from Jezebel.
10/09/09
1 - Oh my God, I didn't see that connection. (This is acceptable to say).
2 - I am SO SO sorry.
3 - I won't do it again.
4 - Remove joke.
That's the decent thing to do. Swearing at your commenters like a 14 year old Myspace user is not the behaviour of someone running a large site like this one. Or at least, it shouldn't be.
We are not hypersensitive. "Crowning" is a regional in-joke. How is everyone supposed to know that joke? All many people saw is "turd" and the black girl. It's an obvious mis-step.
I really think you need to put your big girl pants on and own this stuff up, redact and apologise.
10/09/09
10/09/09
People here were reacting to what was seen as most likely an unintended juxtaposition between brown skin and shit, but wanting clarification on what the joke was.
The correct response to someone pointing out that something I said was (intentionally or not) hurtful and brought up racist associations is NOT "don't be so hypersensitive. you just didn't get the joke." Getting defensive completely invalidates their experiences as a person of color in this society, something I (as a white girl) cannot know and cannot experience. The correct response is, "Oh, I am so sorry! I totally didn't mean it that way. I will try to be more aware in the future." That's how you start to create a safe space for EVERYONE.
10/09/09
10/08/09
Also, for anyone who watched the whole episode: Did the blonde mom speak in anything other than cliches? It was really quite a feat.
10/09/09
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10/08/09
My best friend in elementary school took ADHD meds for school but not on weekends, and definitely never when she had to play sports. Depending on her daughter's mood, her mother (a doctor) would decide if she should take them for a family party, summer camp, etc. I've never known anyone who took ADHD meds 100% of the time, because sometimes the side-effects (like the listlessness this mom mentions) aren't worth it.
10/08/09
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10/09/09
I don't really have an issue with this girl skipping her meds, but I think she is old enough to give some input on when she should and should not take them. And it is pretty shallow of the mom to want her off them so she can perky for a pageant, but sometimes Adderall can kill your personality, which isn't a terrible reason to skip it if you're planning on doing something very social.
10/08/09
There's an app for that.
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10/08/09
To be fair, I don't know her medical history. But there is a recent trend of ADHD misdiagnosis, and the culprit tends to be - surprise - adults expecting children to behave like adults.
Also, what kind of self-esteem are you setting up when you photoshop the hell out of your already cute as a button daughter?
The mother did have some awesome sayings though. I will henceforth tell my brother to stop being the turd in the punch bowl.
10/08/09
I just wish that there could be one post where some kid has ADHD without people questioning whether the child actually has it. Who knows, but some doctor thought she did, and you have no way of knowing what testing the doctor did, or how competent the doctor is. Or, what it's like to grow up as an undiagnosed kid.
10/08/09
10/08/09
My point was just that I wished this didn't come up every time someone mentions "child" + "ADHD," when over-diagnosis, or her disorder isn't really the point of the post.
10/08/09
So yeah, nonverbal learning disability does not equate to ADHD, but I know what it's like to not necessarily reflect the socially acceptable symptoms of a particular condition. To constantly feel behind or different in certain areas, but the only explanation given by the people around you is that "you're weird."
My comment came more from a couple different psychology professors talking about this trend. They're not God, so maybe the trend thing is a whole lot of hoopla. And I'm not a doctor. But given her particular circumstances, I was just wondering.
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I have many, many opinions about ADD itself and diagnoses, but it irritates me that every time ADD is mentioned in any context people make comments questioning whether the kid even has it. Who knows, not really the point of the clip. I'd rather people just talked about whether it's wise to give kids their medicine on a day to day basis.
But I think singleing out one person to express frustration with what I think is a "trend" of commenters objecting to the validity of ADHD diagnoses any time a child with ADHD is featured in a post is a really poor strategy. Especially when I'm not very articulate and use run-on sentences. And I really like your description: "constantly feel behind or different in certain areas, but the only explanation given by the people around you is that 'you're weird,'" I think that can apply to many of the more "minor" learning disabilities and brain disorders, because I can totally identify!
@mypsychoticself: I don't disagree with anything you're saying I just don't think that has anything to do with this clip, and hate that this stuff gets brought up every time people discuss ADD.
10/08/09
10/08/09
Let's take a look at that last frame and ask ourselves "what's wrong with this picture"? Or perhaps more accurately, "what's wrong with the fact that I just said that this picture reminded me of a turd"?
Benefit of the doubt and all, but the word "crowning" must be used about a zillion times in this show...why did the connection to a turd suddenly manifest "when looking at this screen grab"?
10/08/09
10/08/09
Anyway, after I made the joke to myself, then I read Tracie's caption. And I looked at the rest of the image, then forgot that I had even made the connection between crowning/turds, and then my eyes got wide and I was like, "Did that seriously just happen!?"
Then i was like, "Oh no, she's making the same reference that I had already made in my head, she must be making the same joke I am, and only referenced because of another column of hers."
I have a feeling that Rich and Tracie have a current running joke about poop and crowning and it was just on her mind when it popped up. So I definitely get where you're coming from, because I came from there too for a hot second, but I think it was just an unfortunate error.
10/08/09
here's the potpsych I was talking about: [jezebel.com]
The "crowning" reference is right at the three minute mark.
In summation, I do not think that Tracie was saying that the girl in the frame was a turd or turdlike by virtue of being black or even by virtue of being "hunched over," as though straining over stool. I think it is as simple as having turds on the brain from the mom talking about it, and then seeing "CROWNING" in big bold letters. An easy, if contextually ridiculously insensitive, connection to draw and comment to make.
10/08/09
What's going on in all of your heads that you could think the comment could have anything to do with race?
10/08/09
10/08/09
I thought it was pretty clear because of the of the word "crowning". No?
Is it really not completely obvious that Tracie would never make a connection between race and shit?
OMG. This place is nuts. I need to find a new place to kill time.
10/08/09
10/08/09
Well, crap, now you had to go and be all nice to me. Thanks. I'll stay until the next round of PMS.
10/08/09
Also, I know I'm not alone in having never heard "crowning" outside of the context of giving birth.
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10/08/09
It may be "duh" to you, but honestly, I gasped when I read it too, as I have never heard crowning in relation to poop either. I was actually going to make a comment asking for an explanation myself when I saw this comment thread. People just wanted you to realize what some of the other possible readings of your caption were, and that one of them is highly offensive. I don't think anyone was trying to pin racist intent on you. That wasn't the point at all.
10/09/09
That itself is offensive... to Tracie.
This is the only place on the internet I can think of where we can go were the editor sees a picture of people of color and NOT assume she is associating them with shit. We would not fucking be here if this was that kind of place.
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10/09/09
And it is incredibly upsetting to be called out as racist when it is very unlikely that that that was what she meant.
I say "unlikely" only because I know this blog and have been reading it for years. If this were Perez (or some other bigotyasshole blog) I would call him a fucking asshole, but Jezebel is not THAT blog and this kind of thing is what I thought we called "threadhacking" and I am pretty sure it has been mentioned before that we should give each other the benefit of the doubt around here. This blog is not that bigotyasshole blog.
10/09/09
Also, Jezebel is not a racism-free utopia.
Finally, as for the benefit of the doubt, I point you to MizJenkins first comment, "Benefit of the doubt and all, but the word "crowning" must be used about a zillion times in this show...why did the connection to a turd suddenly manifest "when looking at this screen grab"? "
If this is a threadjack, fine, let's just end it here, especially since Tracie has responded to MizJenkins. We don't really need to hear any more about how incredibly upsetting it is to be called out as a racist. I weep.
10/09/09
There's really no need for you to be an asshole. She's just stating her opinion.
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10/09/09
Without joking or insensitivity though, I think we have a problem when we force people to make a racist connection where one was not intended. Yes, racism is alive and is certainly a problem. This just isn't a case of it. If the Washington Post does a story of Orangutans or Gorillas at the zoo and runs a story about Obama on the opposing or even same page, we shouldn't assume there is some racist intent in the proximity of the stories.
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That would be MY PMS, not the group's PMS which would make no sense.
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10/08/09
I can't say I'm judging her objectively but her voice is grating on my nerves.
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WTF?