• We should have seen this coming: Lindsay Lohan and John Mayer were spotted sharing a table and dancing together at a New York club last night. "She was way into it," says an eyewitness, "She would follow his every move..."

• "He would dance with the waitresses and then come back," continues the source. Linds Tweeted about the evening: "@johncmayer shhhhhhhhhhhhhh butter-face :)" Where will he find the time to romance Linds if he's still hooking up with Jessica Simpson and fathering Jennifer Aniston's baby? (According to the tabloids.) [E!]
• The suicidal Tweets issued by "themichaellohan" weren't actually written by Michael Lohan — he doesn't even have a Twitter account. [Ok]
• Jessica Simpson said Dallas Cowboys wide receiver Miles Austin is hot, so TMZ says Cowboys fans should start worrying that the "Yoko Romo curse" is back on. [TMZ]
• Jennifer Aniston is launching a DVD for her yoga instructor, Mandy Ingber. "Jen works out with Mandy up to five times a week, and they have become such great friends she even takes Mandy on vacation with her. So Jen was delighted to help launch her DVD," says a source. [N.Y. Post]
• Rachel Uchitel, Tiger Woods' alleged mistress, says the story is bogus. "This is ridiculous. Not a word of it is true... I told the Enquirer and Star [the tabloids that broke the story] that it wasn't true. I told them not only did I have information to disprove the story, but I offered to take a lie-detector test." [People]
• However, two more women have come forward claiming they had affairs with Tiger Woods while he was married to Elin Nordegren — and they may have the voicemails to prove it. Jaimee Grubbs of Tool Academy fame told her story to Us and the other woman is still shopping her story. Grubbs claims she had a 31-month affair with Tiger that started in 2007 when she was 21. She told Us she has photos, racy texts, and a voicemail from November 24 in which he says his wife may be on to them. [Radar Online, Us]
• Tiger Woods' lip was split open after his car crash on Friday morning, but police sources say there was no blood in his SUV. [TMZ]
• The Florida Highway Patrol announced today that they're giving Tiger Woods a $164 ticket for reckless driving. There investigation is over and they will not seek any search warrants for his medical records. [TMZ]
• The Adams family, Tiger Woods' neighbors, have hired lawyers to talk to the media. They say Elin Nordegren asked the Adams' for help, which is why they called 911. They gave him a pillow and a blanket and waited for the ambulance. They say there were no signs that they were fighting that night and Elin was concerned for Tiger's safety. [TMZ]
• A judge approved a request from Jennifer Lopez's lawyer for an Emergency Court Order to keep the racy video she made with Ojani Noa from being released to the public. J.Lo didn't attend the hearing. [Radar Online]
• Jennifer Lopez's attorney says there is no "sex tape." "There wasn't anything close to sex in it," he said. "We never alleged that. But it's still private and personal to my client." After the decision Ojani Noa complained, "They're trying to stop me from making my documentary and I'm fighting for my rights... They're not being fair." [People]
• A home video of Marilyn Monroe smoking marijuana at a party in the late '50s has surfaced. The person who shot the film recently sold it to a collector for $275,000. [Reuters]
• Rihanna said her life is far from normal. "It's definitely more intense," she said. "Every day is another curveball, but now I know how to handle it. Every time you get put in a situation, it somehow makes you stronger." [E!]
• Rihanna admitted the leaked naked pictures of her are real. "They were for my boyfriend at the time," she said, "if you don't send your boyfriend naked pictures, then I feel bad for him." She added, "It was the worst thing that could possibly ever happen to me. I just felt like my whole privacy was taken before that [with the other photo leak] and then, when that came out, I thought, 'Oh great, so now there's nothing they don't know about me and my private life. It was humiliating and it was embarrassing – especially my mom having to see that." [People]
• The court date for TLC's case against Jon Gosselin has been moved from December 14 to December 10. [Radar Online]
• Those in charge of Michael Jackson's estate rejected 24-year-old Prince Michael Malachi Jet Jackson's claim that he's the late singer's lovechild, so he filed an objection asking a judge to "have determined that he is the biological son of decedent Michael Joseph Jackson ... and gain whatever benefits he is entitled to." [TMZ]
• Tori Spelling and Candy Spelling's feud may be over. They started talking in September when they were both in the hospital and Candy finally met her granddaughter Stella. [E!]
• Verne Troyer says his ex-girlfriend Yvette Monet, who just obtained a restraining order against him, just wants money from him and "at no time did I ever threaten Ms. Monet or even hint to her that I would harm her in any way." [TMZ]
• Lisa Loeb gave birth to her first child, Lyla Rose Loeb Hershkovitz, on Sunday morning. [People]
• Possible Lost spoiler: Emilie de Ravin was spotted shooting a scene for the final season with Evangeline Lilly. [E!]
• John Mellencamp's 14-year-old son Speck is asking people to start a Facebook group he created to get his dad to stop smoking. Mellencamp says he'll quit if he gets 1 million people to join. [AP]
  QUOTES
• It seems Ryan Reynolds didn't finish watching yesterday's episode of Regis and Kelly even though his wife Scarlett Johansson was performing at the end of the show. When asked if he saw it he said, "Wait. Was that the show with Matt Dillon?" [Showbiz 411]
• Kate Garraway, the host of Britain's GMTV, said after Mariah Carey appeared on the show, "I've heard a lot of rumours about her being a diva over the years and guess what? It's all true! While Mariah was very nice, the amount of people she had in her entourage was hilarious. They outnumbered the entire GMTV crew!" Now her bosses have forced her to apologize to Mariah. [The Mirror]
• Bill Clinton called his future son-in-law Marc Mezvinsky "a great human being," and, a source says, "Bill adores him. This is the son he didn't have... This is the relationship Bill didn't have with his father." [People]
• When asked who should play President Obama in a movie, Morgan Freeman said, "Denzel. Denzel could pull it off quite nicely. You would totally believe him." [U.S. News]
• Steffi Graf said of the first roses Andre Agassi ever sent her, "I wondered where they came from. Each rose was stunning. You felt every petal had reached the perfect moment of its bloom." [Vogue]
• "One of the reasons I think I've gained weight pretty quickly during my pregnancy is that I'm not exercising as much as I do normally ... I can't. I'm feeling tired, and I have this business to run," says Padma Lakshmi. "You hope that with age, what you pay for in gravity, you gain in gravitas. I'm sure my thighs looked better when I was 25, but I think my mind is better today." [People]
• In addition to acting on Mad Men, Bryan Batt owns a home decor and gift shop in New Orleans with his partner Tom Cianfichi. "It's something we always wanted to do," said Batt. "I've always loved gifts and shopping and design." [AP]
• Daniel Radcliffe says after the Harry Potter films are over, his next project will be starting a family. "No man, I've got kids to have yet!" he said. "They're going to keep me busy if I do – which I hope I do at some point. I'm not planning on it soon – that's one of the things I'm really looking forward to doing." [People]
• Mila Kunis says Darren Aronofsky offered her a part in Black Swan over iChat. Here's how their conversation went, according to Kunis: "Hey." "Hey. Do you want to do this?" "Video chat? "No, the movie." "If you just offered me the movie, I think you need to get on video chat and offer it to me." [BlackBook Magazine]

• Filming of Sex And The City 2 has gotten "chaotic," with crazed fans "bombarding the set." An eyewitness says:

"At one point, teenage girls were practically trampling each other trying to get to Sarah Jessica as she was walking back to her trailer, but her security team was shoving everyone out of the way." Security has been stepped up, but a source says there are so many guards "They looked more like they were protecting the President than Sarah Jessica Parker." OMG SHOES COCKTAILS CARRIE OMG. [Gatecrasher]

• More than two months after his death, Michael Jackson's burial will finally take place. Today. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Apparently the LAPD are only focusing on Dr. Conrad Murray in Michael Jackson's homicide investigation. [TMZ]
• Janet Jackson will grant an interview to Harper's Bazaar — her first since her brother's death. Plus, she'll land the cover. [Page Six]
• Jon Gosselin bought a "bunch of blondes" a round of shots at the Mirage in Las Vegas; later he was seen with the same group having champagne at a nightclub and while the ladies massaged his neck. Then the universe collapsed on itself and we all died. [Page Six]
• Madonna has broken her own record for a top-grossing tour by a solo artist: The Sticky & Sweet world tour pulled in $408 million after playing to more than 3.5 million fans at 85 shows. That breaks the record set by her Confessions tour, though the Rolling Stones had the top-grossing tour overall. [Reuters]
• On final night of Madonna's tour — last night in Tel Aviv — Rocco and Lourdes were on stage with their mom. Rocco "bounced up and down" to dance tracks; Lourdes danced and played piano. Blurry pix at the link. [Daily Mail]
• Whitney Houston's first album in seven years is expected to sell about 250,000 copies: Not exactly a huge hit. [Gatecrasher]
• Before his death, DJ AM was working on an MTV show, Gone Too Far, about helping young people get sober. It was slated to premiere October 5; but when asked if that is still the case, an MTV spokesperson said: "No decision has been made at the present time." [People]
• DJ AM was buried yesterday in a small funeral in L.A. attended by family members and close friend Travis Barker. [People]
• Travis Barker and DJ AM were the only survivors of a 2008 plane crash in South Carolina, and this picture of Travis standing aloof at DJ AM's funeral is sad. [TMZ]
• Cate Blanchett was injured when a prop radio hit her head onstage Wednesday night in Sydney, Australia, during a scene in A Streetcar Named Desire. A theater company spokesperson says: "I've spoken to Cate. She's absolutely fine." [Reuters]
• Sandra Bullock — who has who has donated generously to Warren Easton Senior High School since Hurricane Katrina — just purchased a historic home in the Garden District in New Orleans. The manse is 6,000 square feet, replete with gables and iron-work. [NOLA.com]
• The former assistant of Tyra Banks claims she owes him $5,820. [TMZ]
• Alec Baldwin is not, repeat, not interested in Bethenny Frankel. He says: I don't know her and wasn't looking to meet her, but somehow this ends up in the Daily News — manufacturing a nice gesture into a total BS item suggesting I want to date this woman. Nothing against her, but I'm not dating anyone." [Page Six]
• "Tom Cruise has packed his magnificent luggage and left the country. The Hollywood star flew back to Los Angeles on Monday night, leaving wife Katie Holmes and their daughter Suri in Melbourne." [News.com.au]
• Tom Cruise will narrate a documentary called Together: The Hendrick Motorsports Story, about car owner Rick Hendrick and his 25 years in NASCAR. [Mirror]
• Lisa Loeb: Pregnant. [People]
• Keanu Reeves claims that he doesn't even know the Canadian woman claiming he fathered her children. He's willing to take a DNA test. [TMZ]
• As mentioned in Midweek Madness, Holly Madison says, "Plastic surgery changed my life." She used to stuff her bra, and once she started living with Hef, she had low self esteem. A nose job and implants changed everything. [Life & Style]
• Oh no: Former teen heartthrob Andrew Keegan (10 Things I Hate About You, Camp Nowhere) is being accused of abusing his girlfriend. A model named Kristi Parrales is requesting a restraining order against him, claiming that he threw her across the living room. Keegan denies everything. [TMZ]
• From a review of Jay-Z's new album, The Blueprint 3: "There was a time when a rapper couldn't expect to last past his 20s. Jay-Z, who is nearing 40 and releasing his 11th studio album, shows that for someone who is measured mostly against himself, lyrical dexterity doesn't have an expiration date." [USA Today]
• Look for Dan Akyroyd to sign purchased bottles of Crystal Head Vodka at a Philadelphia liquor store next week. Did you know Dan was a distiller? Crystal Head is his vodka that comes in a cool skull-shaped bottle. [UPI]
• Tony Romo is dating Chace Crawford's sister, Candice, a former Miss Missouri, who unfortunately has total crazy eye in the picture at the link. [NY Daily News]
• Tom Hanks is the narrator and executive producer of a "4-D experience" at the National World War II Museum in New Orleans, and got an all-star cast to join him: Brad Pitt, Kevin Bacon, Patricia Clarkson, Kevin Connolly, James Cromwell, Viola Davis, Tobey Maguire, Gary Sinise and Elijah Wood. [Page Six]
• Project Runway's "catfighting catwalkers" have their own gossip item! [Page Six]
• "If Björk Is Nearby, No One Will Notice You Are Peeing in Public." [NY Mag]

OK!
"I Still Love Nick!" At no point in this story is there a quote from Jessica Simpson saying, "I still love Nick." Instead, there's information about how, on August 1, Jess went to Katsuya in West Hollywood with Ken Paves and sister Ashlee and John Mayer stopped by. He poured champagne and told jokes for them! Jess got so tipsy that she wanted to drunk dial ex Tony Romo, but Ashlee took the phone away. Moving on: Brad and Angie believe that absence makes the heart grow fonder, or something. They've been apart because taking breaks put the spice back in their life. Also inside: Old pictures of Michael Jackson's SECRET NORWEGIAN LOVE CHILD Omer Bhatti at Prince Jackson's first birthday. Omer is wearing at hat which reads, "Doo-Doo." Also be sure and check out the picture of MJ and Omer on an elephant. Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart: No longer an item! "Their passion ultimately fizzled," claims the mag. As if it was ever there! "The future is up in the air," says a source. Isn't it always? Lastly: Kimora Lee Simmons and Djimon Hounsou have a cute new baby boy named Kenzo (Fig 1).
Grade: F (paper cut on genitalia)

Life & Style
"I Don't Need A Boob Job!" In this "exclusive" interview with Kelly Ripa — conducted at a Super Saturday Shopping Event in Water Mill, NY — she says, "I would never have a boob job." Then the mag provides pictures going back for the last decade illustrating that when Kelly weighed more or was pregnant, her breasts were larger; yet as she worked out more, and lost weight, her rack became smaller. This story spins off into four pages about other stars' boobs and how they feel about them. Next: Zahara and Shiloh went to Toys R Us with Angelina to buy Spider-Man party supplies for Maddox's birthday and were cute while doing so. At a recent ballet class, an eyewitness says: "They held hands and sat side by side. Zahara was a little more coordinated, and she tried to help Shiloh. Zahara took the big sister role." Kate Gosselin is "so lonely." Her friend Jamie Ayers says: "She's lonely now that Jon's gone." Jessica Simpson is being "tortured by her ex," John Mayer: He's never stopped texting or leaving voicemails, and in one voicemail he serenaded her. "Jess said it sounded like he was in a restroom and tipsy, but that's normal for John." Another source says: "Every now and then he would sex-text Jessica or send her fairly explicit messages. She used to keep all the texts and read them over and over. It was a real ego boost for her." But! John Mayer does the same thing to Jennifer Aniston. The mother of Samantha Burke, Jude Law's new baby mama, says "Let's be very clear: It was a total mistake, and Jude hasn't called Samantha a single time." Is Chris Brown stalking Rihanna? They "coincidentally" stayed at the same hotel, then he drove up to a restaurant where she was eating and stared out the window. And Rihanna tattooed her tattoo artist, Bang Bang, and now Chris has also tattooed Bang Bang. Bang Bang tells the mag: "We talked about the tattoo Rihanna did on me. I was like, 'Don't let her give me a better tattoo than you.' He did a little face, like a little cartoon." Lastly: Inside Paris Hilton's $325,000 dog house, which is a two-story miniature version of her house, with a crystal chandelier, air-conditioned upstairs bedroom with closet, and a "Furcedes" bed (Fig. 2).
Grade: F (paper cut on eye)

Us
"Bachelorette Betrayed!" Ugh. Who cares. Some dude proposed to some chick on national TV and they've been talking about how they're so in love and plan to get married, but while he was taping the show he had two girlfriends back home and so on and so forth, YAWN. Apparently there was some kind of scenario in which he was unable to perform sexually, and the mag calls it "guilt wilt." Moving on: Sarah Michelle Gellar had a baby shower and Michelle Trachtenberg, Kristin Chenoweth and Shannen Doherty attended. "Bump Watch: Male Edition" made us giggle, despite ourselves. (Fig 3). Slumdog's Dev Patel and Friend Pinto: Officially a couple! Jon Gosselin had a "sexy sleepover" with a 23-year-old model, waitress and single mom named Stephanie Santoro. Michael Lohan claims she's a nanny. By the by, while shooting for TLC, between takes, Jon was "inattentive" with the kids. Also, Jon allegedly got $40,000 for his In Touch interview. Lastly: Brats from Real Housewives (Francois, Johan, Gia) are modeling back to school clothes in this issue.
Grade: F (paper cut on tongue)

Star
"Broken Home." Angie and Brad's relationship was "too hot not to cool down." Two days before the trip, Brad disinvited Angelina from the German premiere of Inglourious Basterds. Brad started drinking at a photocall hours before the premiere and kept going until 4am. Angie kept calling, but he wouldn't pick up, and she was nagging him so much that he shut his phone off. That night, Brad continued to party with director Katya von Garnier, who he was linked to in 1997, when she went with him to the premiere of Seven Years In Tibet. Things have been crazy at home: Shiloh has been throwing tantrums. Shiloh tries to intervene when Brad and Angie fight; once she told Angie, "Stop yelling at Daddy"; another time she threw her doll at Angie. Angie has been booking the suite at a Beverly Hills hotel where her mother lived before her death; a source says: "Angie likes to go to [her mother's] old suite and be alone and think and cry." Moving on: Penn Badgley wants to marry Blake Lively now, but she wants to wait because she thinks they're too young. But she's up for living together and getting a puppy. Blind item! "Which Hollywood hubby has been cheating on his pregnant wife with a teenager? He's definitely known as a cad, but even for him, this is ridiculous." Robert Pattinson: On the rebound, with Camilla Belle, who broke up with Joe Jonas. Did Kate Gosselin buy an apartment 40 feet away from her bodyguard's place? True Blood's Ryan Kwanten — Jason Stackhouse — was in an S&M themed play in Australia in 2002, hence the shirtless pic of him with angel wings. John Mayer drunk dialed Jessica Simpson and BEGGED her to hang out with him at Katsuya on August 1st. She headed there with Ashlee and Ken Paves, and after dinner in the main restaurant, she joined John in a back room. The mag says: "But diet-conscious Jess made sure not to indulge in too much champagne and kept shaking her head as John coaxed her to keep up with him." Lastly: Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick are taking their 7-week-old twins on vacation to Ireland, where the couple goes every year (Matthew's sister is an Episcopal minister there). And by the by: SJP and Cynthia Nixon, who had been the closest of the Sex and the City ladies, aren't speaking to each other because SJP didn't attend a gay right rally with Cynthia and her partner. Boo.
Grade: D (paper cut between fingers)

In Touch
"I'm Tired Of Being Blamed." In an epic interview, Jon says stuff like: "Throughout the marriage, I felt like my personality had changed a lot. In December, I went to therapy. I asked Kate to come, but she didn't want to. She said, if you have a problem, go fix it." And: "I used to be very introverted, but in my marriage, I became extroverted, I was very open and friendly. I don't think Kate liked that." And: "I'm not a womanizer." The mag asks him if his girlfriend Hailey wants kids. He says: "I don't know. We never really talked about having kids. I know they want kids at certain ages." He also says: "I'm not asking her to be the kids' stepmom, I'm asking her to love me for who I am." Jon also claims he never dated Kate Major, he was just "hanging out" with her. He was happy to know someone in New York to go to dinner with, but "I've always been true to Hailey," he says. As for Kate Major, he says: "I think she fell for me but I knew my heart was with Hailey. I tried to be nice to everyone and I didn't want to lead anyone on." ENOUGH. Next: Brad and Angelina's kids are "caught in the middle." There's tension in the Jolie-Pitt relationship. Brad got wasted at the German premiere of Inglourious Basterds: "He was so drunk he looked to me like he could barely walk," says a source. "It was not the sort of behavior you'd expect from a father of six." Dads don't drink? And! Maddox recently made Zahara cry when he swiped one of her dolls and cut its hair off. This week in Jennifer Aniston "heartbreak" news, the magazine prints the words "Jen is desperate" next to a picture of her, and the story has a quote from Dr. Judy Kurianski, author of The Complete Idiot's Guide To Dating (Fig. 4). Lastly: Britney wants another baby. "I want more babies!" she exclaimed while getting ready in her dressing room.
Grade: C- (paper cut on finger)

Fig. 1

Fig. 2 (Click to enlarge)

Fig. 3

Fig. 4

• Mark Wahlberg married his longtime girlfriend Rhea Durham yesterday in a small ceremony in Beverly Hills. "She looked like a princess and beyond stunning. Mark looked ecstatic," says a source. So much for Nicole 4 Eva! [People]

• In more wedding news, Ali Larter was married this weekend, as well, to actor Hayes MacArthur in Kennebunkport, Maine. [USWeekly]
• And Milla Jovovich is set to walk down the aisle on August 22 to marry her fiance of six years, director Paul W.S. Anderson. [DailyMail]
• Demi Moore, meanwhile, will celebrate her fourth year of marriage to Ashton Kutcher by adopting his surname. "Demi didn't want to change her name at first because it didn't seem right but now she finally feels ready," says a source. [ShowbizSpy]
• Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have allegedly had a bit of a tiff over their final resting places: "Angelina initially wanted to be buried beside her ex-husband Billy Bob (Thornton)," says a source, "She bought his and hers cemetery plots in Louisiana but since then she's changed her will. She's been trying to persuade Brad to make a decision on where they should be buried but he thinks the whole thing is morbid." [DailyMail]
• Pitt has been dealing with the stress by retreating to his separate two-bedroom home, where neighbors say he has been "playing Nick Drake quite loudly." Oh, dear. [DailyMail]
• G.I. Joe star Channing Tatum says he loves being a newlywed: "We've been together, and nothing's really changed. It's pretty much the same as I've felt every day since I met her – and that's just about perfect." [People]
• Disturbing: Charles Manson allegedly runs a memorabilia business out of his cell, selling autographs to morbid collectors. [PageSix]
• Whitney Houston won't be singing live on Good Morning America this September; instead, her performance will be taped the day before, as Whitney "is not a morning person" and would rather not perform at 7:30 am. [PageSix]
• "Michael, after 50 years of waiting, God has finally called you home to do what you do best. He shared your extraordinary talent with us all for many decades and now it's time for you to spread your wings to a much higher level, which of course I know you will do, and join the other angels and give them an incredible eternal performance. Keep the angels smiling, Joker!"- LaToya Jackson, in a post on her website, dedicated to her brother Michael. [USWeekly]
• Jackson's death has been devastating for his mother, Katherine Jackson, who currently has custody of his children: "This pressure is tearing her apart physically and emotionally," says a source, "At her age and in her fragile state of health, more exertion could trigger another stroke. She has full time nursing care but the strain is visibly taking its toll." [DailyExpress]
• Judd Apatow's Funny People won the Friday box office with 8.6 million dollars. [EW]
• Kate Gosselin has reportedly purchased a condo in Rockville, Maryland that's only about a mile away from the home of her bodyguard, Steve Neild. [E!]
• Blind Item:"Which Oscar winning actor has used this as a chat-up line? 'Why don't you to come back to my trailer and let me impregnate you? Think about it – 20 grand a year for life.'" [BlindGossip]
• "I could not be happier. I'm absolutely thrilled with her as a person, as an actor. I've gotten to know her a bit over this time, and I can't speak highly enough of her."-Joan Jett, approving Kristen Stewart's portrayal of her in The Runaways. [ONTD]
• Courtney Love has allegedly been taking the growth hormone Genotropin in an attempt to slow the aging process. "Courtney has been struggling with her weight,' says a source, "She's been using the hormones to help her gain muscle and for anti-ageing and likes the results. But she's not very discreet. She even left a vial of it in her LA hotel room." [DailyMail]
• A source claims that Jessica Simpson's Barbie and Ken themed birthday party was the last straw for Tony Romo, who broke up with Simpson the night before the party was supposed to take place: "There was no way Tony was going to dress up like a Ken doll. He never would have lived it down. His teammates would have roasted him to death. But sadly, Jess just didn't get it!" [ShowbizSpy]
• "I love kids, don't get me wrong, because without them I wouldn't be where I am today, but they do follow me around to the most peculiar places. And they're very loud! When they start screaming it's sweet to see how enthusiastic they are, but I'm going to go deaf sooner than most people. It's impossible to calm them down when they start, I just cover my ears."- Vanessa Hudgens [ShowbizSpy]
• "I don't drink, so how am I going to meet people? I'm going to go up to a drunk guy and be like, ‘Hey, let me take advantage of you'? Not that I'm antisocial. I am kind of antisocial. It's just so intimidating to go from, like, ‘You want to play basketball and get to know each other?' to ‘Let's go on a date and see if it might get dirty.'"- Charlyne Yi on the difficulties of dating. [NYTimes]

[Image via WENN]

• Jon Gosselin said accusations made by Kevin and Jodi Kreider (Kate's brother and his wife) that his kids are overworked are absurd. He questioned the Kreider's credibility on the matter saying, "They were only in seasons one and two, anyway."

• Jon explained: "My kids probably film an hour and half to two hours a day and we only film three days a week... For Kevin and Jodi to go out there and say were filming eight hours a day and it's hard core, that's ridiculous." [Radar Online]
• Jessica Simpson is spending a ton of money to look good on her new show The Price of Beauty. "To get her camera-ready each episode will cost $25,000. She insists on using her own hair, makeup and fashion stylists, who are more expensive than J.Lo's." says a source. [The Daily Express]
• A source says Jessica Simpson is "bummed" about her split from Tony Romo, but it's for the best because, "[Tony] wanted her to be a house mom and be in Dallas, and he wants to go out and play – and not just football." The source adds, "Tony had his eyes on everyone but her towards the end... But let's not forget they lasted for a long time and he stuck with her even though the fans didn't like her." Should we really give Tony a medal for not dumping Jess when strangers complained about her? [People]
• Jessica Simpson Tweeted: "My godson Dylan giving me a hug after hitting me in the back with my louboutin leopard wedges." [Us]
• Kevin Federline is in Las Vegas filming scenes for a VH1 reality show about his life as a father of four, which hasn't officially been picked up. "He has been through a lot over the years, but handled himself very well. He's learned how to balance being a super single dad and the chaotic life of business, fame and fortune," says a source. "He strives to be a good father." [People]
• Kevin Federline was ordered to lose 45 pounds for the show. "Victoria Prince is supposed to have a big part in the show,"" said a source. They're billing her as Kevin's new Britney." [Radar Online]
• Marie Osmond will not be returning to TV this fall in a syndicated talk show. An executive at who works at the show's distributor said, "Our belief in Marie's creative vision for a new kind of talk show is unshakable, but in the end, the marketplace this year was simply unyielding." [Variety]
• Two Ohio police chiefs and a local mayor's son were arraigned on 10 felony charges, including burglary and tampering with evidence, related to a break in at the home of Sarah Jessica Parker's surrogate. They plead no guilty to all charges. [E!]
• A lawyer for Dr. Allan Metzger, Michael Jackson's former doctor, says he warned Michael abotu Propofol in April. "Jackson was looking for propofol and Dr. Metzger turned him down and advised him how dangerous it was," says the lawyer. "Apparently, Jackson was shopping around for the drug or looking for someone to administer it to him." [People]
• Eminem makes fun of Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon in his new song "The Warning," but Nick says he's planning his next move. He Tweeted: "This ain't checkers. This is chess." Eminem must be so scared! [Perez Hilton]
• About 100 people attended the funeral of American Idol contestant Alexis Cohen last weekend in New Jersey. "I was shocked, stunned and mortified when I found out," said her ex-boyfriend James Kern, adding, "I can understand people having sympathy for the guy [who hit Alexis], but I hope he gets what he deserves, [People]
• Though Perez Hilton posted what looked like legal papers from Carrie Prejean suing the Miss California USA Organization for firing her, she says the papers were unsigned and unfiled. She said she doesn't intend to sue, but, "There's definitely some things that are false that they've said about me and I think definitely the book will - it's sort of like therapy for me. It's a way for me to just get out the truth, really. [Access Hollywood]
• A source says Reggie Bush broke up with Kim Kardashian because, "Reggie saw text messages on Kim's phone from Kanye West and flipped out on her... The texts referenced a night they hung out, how much fun he had, how hot Kim was, and more racy things that got Reggie's imagination running." [Fox News]
• The Chicago Bomb and Arson Unit investigated a suspicious backpack with wires hanging out of it that was found in a flowerbed outside of Oprah's TV studio this morning. After conducting tests they determined it wasn't a bomb. [TMZ]
• Design firm Delete is accusing Jane Fonda of stealing because her newly redesigned website looks almost exactly like theirs. [Media Bistro]
• Here's a video of an interview with Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, and other stars of New Moon. Kristen and Rob are sitting next to each other, so clearly they're in love. [Pop Sugar]
• Dave Grohl's hometown of Warren, Ohio is naming a street after him. He'll appear at the town's naming ceremony to christen "Dave Grohl Alley." [Rolling Stone]
• OMG: Tyra Banks will appear on an upcoming episode of Gossip Girl. [People]
• Sebastian Stan says of dating Leighton Meester, "I'm a really lucky guy. She's the most interesting, sophisticated, talented and an extremely funny person that I know. She's really hilarious." He added that her kissing scenes on Gossip Girl don't bother him because, "The good part is I get to go home with her." [People]
• Penn Badgley and Chace Crawford ran into each other at Crate and Barrel, while they were both shopping with thier moms. Crawford says, "He was with his mom shopping for his new place, too... It was really funny. I was like, 'What are we doing here, man?' And he's like, ‘I don't know. Right now it looks like we came together with our moms to Crate and Barrel. What's going on?' It was embarrassing." [People]
• Jeff Fahey, the helicopter pilot from Lost is in a House of Representatives meeting for some reason. [Politico]
• RHONY's Bethenny Frankel continued her blog on E! today, writing about last night's premiere of RHOA. She writes: "I am so excited. Atlanta is by far my favorite Housewife outlet (including my own). It is so decadent, so juicy, such a ripe, sweet Georgia peach, and as is always the case with peach season, I never want it to end." [E!]
• RHOA's Kim Zolciak has filed a police report against NeNe Leakes, who Kim claims strangled her during a fight. [Entertainment Tonight]
• When asked why he's going to do stand-up again just seven months after having open heart surgery, Robin Williams joked, "I realized I was running out of merchandising money from Bicentennial Man." [People]
• Usher says mentoring at the Boys and Girls Club, "makes me a better man. It makes me a better individual... There's a difference between hard work and heart work, and this would represent heart work." [CNN]
• Christina Aguilera is working on her new record in a studio in her backyard. She says, "it just has been so perfect for me to just wake up in the morning, put on my flip-flops and sweat pants, and just go back in the studio and pretty much get into my creative cave and zone out that way, so it's been really convenient. So the paparazzi have probably been upset with me. I know they told my husband - they're like, 'Is she ever going to leave the house?'"[The Daily Express]
• Melissa Auf Der Maur says to ignore Courtney Love's announcements about a Hole reunion. She says, "My loyalty to the legacy of Hole is eternal. But there is no reunion mapped out at this point. I liked the idea of singing with her again, so I said yes, but no singing has happened and I am not aware of any plans for it. I have nothing to do with, and know nothing about, the legal beagle name game. It is true that Courtney and I have been in touch for the first time in a decade, in the context of female humans with significant history of sisterhood. We both love music and magic and are reconnecting because it's been too long." [The Daily Express]
• Chelsea Handler is upset her show wasn't mentioned in GLADD's report on the state of homosexuals on TV. "I can't speak for the rest of the network, but at Chelsea Lately, we're knocking it out of the park. We've hit a homo run," she said. "We always talk about gay issues and [sidekick] Chuy and I were king and queen of the Gay Pride Parade." She then pointed to various members of her staff she claimed were "the biggest gay in captivity" and "transitioning from albino man to albino woman," and said, "I'll be expecting an apology, which I assume will be on some hermaphrodite's stationery." [E!]
• Uma Thurman says, "The only thing that's more ridiculous than the film industry's obsession with eternal youth is trying to look ten years younger than yourself. I think it's very good to look healthy. I feel very happy to look healthy – but I don't want to live a tortured life of neurosis about it all." She adds that being pretty when you're young isn't all it's cracked up to be: "You know, it's like: ‘You're pretty, be quiet.' Pretty girls get self-conscious because they're constantly getting comments about how they look and they end up getting very shy or actually awkward. Even if they feel big about it – it sort of closes them down." [The Times of London]
• "I don't feel pressure to alter my appearance in any way, but being a girl, the media is more interested in what I choose to wear. People care about what I put on my body, which is strange." — Emma Watson [Ok]
• Satirical website Scrape.TV posted a fake story about Kanye West declaring himself the King of Pop now that Michael Jackson is dead. Unfortunately, other news outlets ran the article without realizing it was a joke. Kanye denied the story on his blog writing, "IT MAKES ME FEEL BAD THAT OBVIOUSLY I MADE PEOPLE FEEL THAT I WOULD BE CORNY ENOUGH TO SAY SOMETHING SO WHACK AFTER THE PASSING OF AN IDOL, A LEGEND AND MORE THAN THAT A HUMAN BEING WITH FEELINGS AND FAMILY.... I DON'T TALK TO PRESS OR DO TV OR DO PROMOTIONS OF ANY SORT. I'VE STOPPED CHASING AND BUYING INTO FAME. FAME IS LIKE CIGARETTES WITH NO SURGEON GENERAL WARNING. IT DESTROYS MOST PEOPLE AS IT DID TO THE TRUE AND ONLY KING OF POP. WE EXPLOIT OURSELVES AND EAT OUR OWN EGOS 'TILL THERE IS NOTHING LEFT. I HAVE A FEELING THAT THIS WON'T BE THE LAST FALSE STATEMENT WITH MY NAME ON IT, BUT THIS WILL BE THE LAST TIME I DEFEND MYSELF. I'M DONE." [Rolling Stone]

• Jude Law got someone pregnant, but not Rachel McAdams' sister Kayleen — her rep (she's a makeup artist) says "She has never even met him." [Star]
• So. The mother of Jude Law's unborn spawn is:

Samantha Burke. She's an actress/model. Naturally. [TMZ]

• A source says that Samantha Burke wants Jude's cash! She expects "a large maintenance payment and financial costs, including a percentage of Jude's future earnings, agreed in writing." [The Sun]
• According to this report, Samantha Burke is from a wealthy family. Also, she looks good in a retro swimsuit. [Daily Mail]
• "Even Seth Rogen Now Hating on Katherine Heigl." He's talking shit about how she talks shit. And dissed The Ugly Truth: "That [movie] looks like it really puts women on a pedestal in a beautiful way." Plus: "I gotta say, it's not like we're the only people she said some batshit crazy things about. That's kind of her bag now." [NY Mag, LA Times]
• Carrie Prejean is planning to sue the Miss California USA organization for slander, libel, public disclosure of private facts, religious discrimination, intentional infliction of emotional distress and negligent infliction of emotional distress. This should be a big old mess. [Perez]
• Need beach reading? Three celebs have "written" new memoirs: Slumdog Millionaire's Rubina Ali; former Playmate Kendra Wilkinson and Good Charlotte's Joel Madden. [NY Daily News]
• Haterade Headline of the Day: "Tony Romo and Nick Lachey rebound with Jessica Simpson look-a-likes while she's left smooching a dog." [NY Daily News]
• Police chiefs suspected of "snooping" at Sarah Jessica Parker's surrogate's home have been arrested. [NY Post]
• Emma Watson is related to a 16th century witch! Her distant relative Joan Playle was excommunicated from the Church of England for witchcraft in 1592. [E!]
• Eminem's new track, "Warning," is an answer to Mariah Carey's song, "Obsessed." He raps: "You probably think since it's been so long if I had something on you I woulda did it by now, on the contrary, Mary Poppins, I'm mixing our studio session down and sending it to mastering to make it loud, enough dirt on you to murder you, this is what the fuck I do... Mariah, it ever occur to you that I still have pictures?" [Yahoo News via E!]
• Amy Winehouse's wedding album: Found in trash. Seems Blaaaaake threw his copy away. [The Sun]
• Nora Ephron says she hopes Julie & Julia will remind everyone that before EVOO, there was BUTTER, which has now been demonized. "I just do not get that at all," Ephron says, since Julia Child and her husband lived into their 90s. "And they drank like fish," she says. "I don't believe that anything has to do with what you eat, if you don't overeat. All these people who think they can cut down on their cholesterol by eating those awful egg-white omelets. There's something I really hate. It is simply not going to make any difference if you have a couple egg yolks in your omelet." [USA Today]
• Will Katie Holmes be in the Sex And The City 2: Electric Boogaloo? A source says: "The character they want her to play is a really ballsy, high-powered company executive who tangles with Samantha." Sometimes you sort of forget she's an actress, for Xenu's sake. [The Sun]
• Jeepin' jeewillickers! Even though Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar named each of their 18 children a name beginning with the letter J, their first grandchild (from son Josh) will be named Mackenzie. Whether Josh and his wife will have 18 kids with M names remains to be seen. [Star]
• So much sadness: This report claims that Michael Jackson may have had collapsed veins and needle marks all over his body — plus — he may have been dead as early as 8:30 a.m. — four hours before paramedics were called. [ET]
• Warrants filed yesterday allege that Michael Jackson was an addict. It's a violation if Dr. Conrad Murray was "prescribing to an addict." [Yahoo News via AP]
• The Michael Jackson autopsy report: Delayed. [TMZ]
• How will TLC balance Jon & Kate's popularity with the family's right for privacy? Network exec Eileen O'Neill says: "It's a sensitive situation and we navigate that as we go along… It's the family's decision to be involved in the show… We want to stay with them as long as they want to stay with us." [Variety]
• What you'll see when Jon & Kate Plus 8 returns: "Jon and Kate have never said they were perfect," Eileen O'Neill says. "You're still going to see two parents that love their kids, but you'll see them parenting separately." [People]
• This columnist asserts that the return of Jon & Kate will help Kate's image. [MSNBC Scoop]
• And, because no one is sick of these people: Jon Gosselin (and Michael Lohan??) brainstormed a new show: Divorced Dads Club. [Page Six]
• Leonardo DiCaprio's ex, Bar Refaeli, has a new man: multi-millionaire Teddy Sagi, who is among Israel's top 30 richest men. [NY Daily News]
• BREAKING: Katy Perry and Rihanna have become inseparable. [Page Six]
• Mario Lopez says the Saved By The Bell reunion was a long time coming: "Everybody knew the 20-year anniversary was coming up. This People story has been in the works for over a year, long before [late night host] Jimmy Fallon started talking about it. We were all excited about it." But what's next? "Everybody is fired up. People keep coming up to me saying 'When are you guys going to do a show?'" [People]
• Mark Paul Gosselaar says of Dustin "Screech" Diamond: That's a disaster on so many levels… I don't know where his head is. I know probably as much as you know from watching things on TV." Plus, Gosselaar says that when he played Zack on Fallon last month, there was a reason he looked young: "I read a blog [where] some guy said, 'Dude, lay off the Botox.' I've never had Botox before. The wig was so fucking tight, it gave me a mini face-lift." [Newsweek]
• Penelope Cruz looked amazing at the premiere of Broken Embraces, but the airline had lost her luggage. [People]
• Penny Cruz: "I love London... but I have difficulties with the rainy weather." [Telegraph]
• Lost spoilers! CHARLIE. [E!]
• Details of the sort-of Seinfeld reunion on Curb Your Enthusiasm, at the link. [LA Times]
• Lawyers are getting involved in that Twilight recasting drama involving Rachelle Lefevre. [E!]
• Viva la revolucion? Benicio del Toro, Bill Murray, Robert Duvall and James Caan were in Cuba yesterday. [Reuters]
• Paul Giamatti calls some scenes from his new film, Cold Souls, "sort of awkward and painful." [WSJ]
• Billy Crudup will join the cast of Eat, Pray, Love the movie, which also stars Julia Roberts, Javier Bardem and Richard Jenkins. [Variety]
• "Bandslam's account of a teenager's awkward attempts to settle into a new school remind former Friends star Lisa Kudrow of her own adolescence." [Telegraph]
• "Singer Peter Andre has accepted "substantial" damages over a newspaper claim he was unfaithful to his estranged wife, model Katie Price." [BBC News]
• "I really felt this film, which had a love affair with boeuf bourguignon, should come out in winter." — Meryl Streep on Julie & Julia. [USA Today]
• "I heard what he had to say and I knew at this moment my life would never be the same. Life no longer seemed like a series of Random events. I also began to see that being Rich and Famous wasn't going to bring me lasting fulfillment and that it was not the end of the journey." — Madonna, on first hearing about Kabbalah when pregnant with Lourdes. [AP]
• "Phoebe was so spiritual and 'out there' — and I wasn't at all. Not. At. All. If anyone was it was Jennifer [Aniston]. She introduced me to certain books that gave me an insight into that world – Phoebe's supposed world – which was a more spiritual realm." — Lisa Kudrow. [Daily Express]
• "My mom and dad were big hippies and I spent time on communes. I just remember the smell of soybeans everywhere. People were making all sorts of strange things out of soybeans: food, clothing, paper, everything. I suppose if I'd gone to military school, maybe I'd be pining for something like Woodstock. But I'm certainly pining for what it represents, and I think that's what Ang was really after with the film." — Liev Schreiber, on Taking Woodstock. [Style.com]
• "I don't watch Jon & Kate, but I still want to punch that Jon douche in the face.his smarmy,fat alcoholic bloat&Ed Hardy wear piss me off" — Rose McGowan. [Twitter]
• "The Jay-Z controversy is great. We couldn't buy P.R. like this. I think Jay-Z said he saw Auto-Tune used in a Wendy's commercial, and that pushed him over the edge." — Marco Alpert, vice president of the company which markets Auto-Tune, on Jay-Z's latest single, "D.O.A. (Death of Auto-Tune)." [NY Times]
• "Fuck you Katy Perry, you fucking stupid, maybe 'not good for the gays,' title thieving, haven't heard much else, so not quite sure if you're talented, fucking little slut." — Jill Sobule. [The Rumpus]

• Last week, Katherine Heigl complained that "cruel and mean" Grey's Anatomy producers forced her to work a 17-hour day, but according to rumors, the schedule was the result of producers shuffling things around to let her promote The Ugly Truth.

• Ken Levine, a producer who does not work on Grey's, says that everyone on the crew was paid overtime for the long day, adding, "This is an extreme case of chutzpah, but it's not uncommon that when shows become big hits cast members become much in demand... All of a sudden, the show that launched their success is now sort of an imposition... So producers are put in the sticky position of either denying them these outside projects or moving heaven and earth to accommodate them." [The L.A. Times]
• EW reports that Jude Law is expecting his fourth child this fall, "following a relationship last year." A rep adds, "no other statements will be made." Mwahaha...we'll see about that! [EW]
• Brad Pitt joked, "It's so tough being an actor... Sometimes they bring you coffee, and sometimes it's cold, and sometimes you don't have a chair to sit on." [People]
• This morning Star said that Michael Cera is 21 and had been dating 33-year-old Charlyne Yi for the past three years, but the two recently broke up (right before their film Paper Hearts opens). Newsweek ran an article dubbing him "The Hipster's Cougar Cub" but then posted a retraction, saying she's probably in her early 20s even though numerous sources say she's 33. Nobody knows here real age, and Newsweek also says he's 20, so we really have no idea how old these kids are. [Newsweek]
• Michael Jackson's friend Dick Gregory said that during MJ's molestation trial he called him saying, "They're trying to kill me ... they'll poison me!" but he was actually just so extremely dehydrated that a doctor at the hospital said if he'd waiting another 12 hours to come in he would have died. [TMZ]
• Michael Jackson's former nutritionist says he mostly existed on juice and smoothie diet, but "He loved trail mix, and once a month he had to have fried chicken." [E!]
• Michael Jackson's chef, Kai Chase, said she knew something was wrong on the morning of MJ's death because Dr. Conrad Murray didn't come downstairs to get the juice and granola he brought him every morning. She says, "I started preparing the lunch and then I looked at my cell phone and it was noon. About 12:05 or 12:10 Dr. Murray runs down the steps and screams, 'Go get Prince!' He's screaming very loud. I run into the den where the kids are playing. Prince runs to meet Dr. Murray and from that point on you could feel the energy in the house change. I walked into the hall and I saw the children there. The daughter was crying. I saw paramedics running up the stairs." Chase, the nanny, the housekeeper, and the kids formed a prayer circle as paramedics tried to save MJ. [Us]
• The DEA and the LAPD are fighting with Las Vegas police because the former agencies wanted to do a simultaneous raid of Dr. Conrad Murray's Houston and Las Vegas residences to maintain an element of surprise, but the Las Vegas police held up the second raid for nearly a week. [TMZ]
• Q: What's hanging above your sofa? David Cross: A painting of Michael Jackson being honored in the Rose Garden with Ronald and Nancy Reagan by his side. [N.Y. Magazine]
• Is Blake Fielder-Civil just holding daily press conferences now? Today he announced that Amy Winehouse cheated on him with four other guys during their marriage. [The Sun]
• When asked about the tabloid-generated rumors that Jessica Simpson would reunite with John Mayer, John's friend Rob Dyrdek said "absolutely not," but added that he "wouldn't rule out... I'm just saying [I don't think so]." [People]
• As mentioned in Midweek Madness, Us claims Tony Romo is dating Natalie Smith, the daughter of his former athletic director at Eastern Illinois University, even though all parties deny it. A source says they're "are are not officially dating, but they are having an intimate relationship." [Us]
• Ryan Reynolds rep has denied rumors that he skipped Comic-Con because of a fight with wife Scarlett Johansson saying, "[The report] is completely untrue. Warner Brothers never planned to have Green Lantern as part of their panel at this year's Comic-Con and Ryan is in Europe shooting a film." [People]
• Yesterday Kelly Clarkson blamed producer Ryan Tedder for not telling her that the backing track on her song "Already Gone" is the same one used on Beyonce's "Halo." Today Tedder replied, "They are two entirely different songs conceptually, melodically, & lyrically and I would never try to dupe an artist such as Kelly Clarkson or Beyoncé into recording over the same musical track, the idea is both hurtful & absurd." [TMZ]
• Ugh. More Twitter clues that Miley Cyrus is leaving her Jonas Brother for Justin Gaston. She Tweeted a line from one of Gaston's songs (apparently he writes music) this morning. [People]
• Georgia Sheriff Al St. Lawrence says he didn't do anything wrong by arresting and releasing the 53-year-old man accused of stalking Miley Cyrus last month. "If we had heard something about this guy supposedly being a stalker or he had been charged with a felony he wouldn't have been released," said St. Lawrence. [WSAV]
• Johnny Depp is looking at schools near Bath, England, where he recently bought a home, for his children Lily-Rose, 10, and Jack, 7. [The Daily Express]
• Madonna has written a column titled "How My Life Changed" about her religious awakening for the Israeli paper Yediot Ahronot. [AP]
• Russell Crowe walked into a charity shop in the U.K. next door to the cafe he's been frequenting while working on Robin Hood and made a £1,000 donation. [BBC]
• Friends of LeAnn Rimes and Dean Sheremet aren't doing much to dispel the rumors that their marriage ended because he's gay (in addition to her affair). They say the two were always spotted shopping for clothes for LeAnn around Nashville and, "When she met Dean, the whole image of who LeAnn Rimes was completely morphed into 'fabulousity," says the source, adding, "Her wardrobe, hair and makeup changed almost over night from the time they started being together." [People]
• For some reason Radar Online has posted the last blurry picture taken of American Idol contestant Alexis Cohen a few hours before she was killed in a hit and run. [Radar Online]
• Bob Barker met with members of the Eastern Band of Cherokee Indians in North Carolina to ask them to stop exhibiting bears in pit-like enclosures at local zoos. [Yahoo]
• Yesterday Courtney Love insulted The Veronicas and Taylor Momsen via Twitter. Lisa Origliasso Tweeted: "Is wondering what is considered 'credible' these days anyway!? A sob story? A drug addition? A guitar? Bleached hair? Give me a break.." [The Veronicas]
• Though a promo for The Real Housewives of Atlanta shows Sheree Whitfield pulling Kim Zolciak's wig off, Kim says, "It didn't happen." Co-star Lisa Wu Hartwell said of the incident, "Did that happen? You have to tune in to see that. But I know she had a hell of a grab on that. She had a serious mean grip." [Us]
• A public records search has revealed some of the names of the rides at the theme park Wizarding World of Harry Potter inside Universal Studios Orlando, including Harry Potter and the Forbidden Journey, Flight of the Hippogriff, and Dragon Challenge. [The L.A. Times]
• While promoting her new reality show How'd You Get So Rich? Joan Rivers said, "I'm still in this business at age 197, and am still relevant." [Media Week]
• A memorial garden honoring Adrienne Shelly, the Waitress actor, writer, and director who was murdered in 2006 will be dedicated in New York's West Village next week. [The N.Y. Times]
• Dolly Parton's Broadway musical 9 To 5 will close around Labor Day after a short run, losing about $14 million. [N.Y. Post]
• The Bachelorette Jillian Harris says of her engagement to Ed Swiderski, "It feels more normal than any relationship I've ever had," Harris says. "It's very strange how it's such a contradiction to have something so normal come from something that's so manic." [People]
• DJ AM was once a cocaine addict and survived a plane crash, and this fall he'll help the families of addicts stage interventions on the MTV show Gone Too Far. "There's no reason why I should have lived or why I lived and they didn't," Goldstein said. "I'm never gonna know. But I am alive and I'm here and I have to do something better with my life now." [The L.A. Times]
• "(I'm) a woman who has been through life experiences, thank God, and therapy. I love therapy! I'm very into it. I'm very in touch with my feelings, so I'm a completely different person. Not that different but you know... I gotta tell you, there's nothing like going in and sitting down and talking to someone who has no emotional tie to your life. Just to talk to someone. It's amazing." — Eva Mendes [The Daily Express]
• A fan asked David Beckham where he came up with his children's names and he responded: "With Brooklyn, we found out when we were in New York that Victoria was pregnant with him, so that's where his name comes from. Romeo comes from [the fact] that we're a very romantic couple. When we first met Tom Cruise - actually quite a few years ago – I said 'Isn't Cruise a really nice name?' And Cruz came from that. Tom was one of the first people we phoned when Cruz was born and told him. [People]
• When a reporter suggested Mad Men reflected the classiness of the '60s, Jon Hamm replied: "Buddy, I don't know if they had class back then. I can send you a couple of links of stuff where guys are berating their wives for making their coffee badly. What I think happened in the '60s is I think irony happened. And the idea of selling non-earnestly became cool. And obviously that's not a mistake that that's when the baby boomers started getting 18. We're seeing a lot of it now, we're seeing these cool hipsters, man ... You can't tell 18-year-olds anything. ... That's what happens. The irony happens. And it's cool to be in a not-cool place. Get it man? And so that's what the big shift was that our guys are trying to figure out." [The L.A. Times]
• January Jones said Mad Men producers admonished her for looking too thin. "I'm naturally pretty thin, so I'm trying," she said, explaining that all the women on the show are "encouraged NOT to work out. We want soft; we don't want any muscle definition. They tell us to gain weight, gain weight, gain weight, because they want a soft, voluptuous woman which they were [back then] which is beautiful, as it should be." [I'm Not Obsessed]

• Mischa Barton's former friend Nicole Richie is helping her get her life back together after her recent meltdown. Nicole, "stepped in and talked to her about making changes in her life… basically doing a 360," says a source.

• "Mischa isn't even smoking anymore, thanks to Nicole... Nicole told Mischa that she has to straighten up because she has a lot riding on this new show," added the source. We hate to question an anonymous source, but it seems her math is a little off there. [Radar Online]
• Maybe the rumors are true: Mischa Barton is scheduled to return to work on The Beautiful Life later this week. Her rep says she "will be resuming production as planned with the rest of the cast in NYC. She's back to business as usual." [People]
• Jessica Simpson said she's not going to ask Tony Romo to return the $100,000 boat she got him for his last birthday. She explained, "I'm not an Indian giver." [TMZ]
• Joe Simpson says Jessica Simpson is "doing very good," since the breakup and she got a 5-carat diamond ring this weekend from a random jewelry designer at a party. What more could a girl want? [E!]
• "Jen romping with so publicly with Butler is like stabbing a knife through Brad's heart," claims a source, because as we all know the only reason Jennifer Aniston continues to pursue romantic relationships is to make Brad Pitt jealous. [ONTD]
• Just so you know, Brad Pitt bought another motorcycle. [The Daily Mail]
• Some are interpreting a reference Miley Cyrus made on Twitter to a John Mayer song to mean that she's going to break up with Nick Jonas for Justin Gaston... or something like that. We can't spend anymore time trying to make sense of a 16-year-old's Tweets. [People]
• Apparently Demi Lovato is still friends with Miley Cyrus even though she just broke up with her brother Trace Cyrus. Lovato says, "Recently [Miley] sent me this four-page text message encouraging me and telling me she has faith in me. It was so inspiring and made me feel great – because I do get a bit overwhelmed by the paps sometimes." [People]
• Amy Winehouse is shipping all of her equipment back from the Caribbean so she can set up a new studio and start recording her third album. [The Sun]
• Now that their divorce is finalized, Blake Fielder-Civil continues to spill details about Amy Winehouse. He says of the first time she tried heroin, "We had a bottle of pink champagne and had sex and were lying on the bed together talking. I'd been smoking heroin on my own before that, but never in front of her. I got a bit for myself, and she looked at me and said, 'Can I have some?' I was out of my mind on drugs and I said, 'Of course'. She inhaled the heroin and then just sat back, smiled and her eyes went a bit funny. She said, 'I can see why you take this'. Amy took to heroin like a duck to water, same as me." [The Sun]
• DEA agents raided Dr. Conrad Murray's home in Las Vegas today looking for Michael Jackson's medical records. An agent spoke to the press and said Dr. Murray was home during the raid. [TMZ, TMZ]
• A spokeswoman for Dr. Conrad Murray's lawyer said, "It's a waste of time responding to all these timed ‘leaks' from ‘anonymous' sources... I have no doubt they want to make a case – for goodness sakes, it's Michael Jackson - but things tend to shake out when all the facts are made known." [Radar Online]
• According to Brody Jenner he doesn't hang out with Lauren Conrad anymore. "I haven't seen much of her since she left the show," said Brody. It's almost like the producers of The Hills were forcing them to hang out. [E!]
• Apparently this L.A. Candy movie is all part of Lauren Conrad's master plan. "Lauren's goal is to get into producing – it always was," says a source, "It was always to make L.A. Candy into a film or TV show. She's been in talks about it." [People]
• Daniel Bark, the man who allegedly hit and killed American Idol hopeful Alexis Cohen has been charged with aggravated manslaughter by causing the death of another while fleeing from law enforcement officers, vehicular homicide and eluding police. Bark's attorney says he's on suicide watch. [UPI, Extra]
• Simon Cowell is dating Mezghan Hussainy, a make-up artist who works on American Idol. [The Daily Mail]
• Marilyn Manson wrote this threat to journalists on his blog: "I can, but do not need to defend myself And the absurd accusations that the average press has clinged onto. If we need a nude photo of me to prove that I am far different than the soon-to-be-murdered-in-their-home press has decided to fabricate, that is easy. But if one more 'journalist' makes a cavalier statement about me and my band, I will personally or with my fans help, greet them at their home and discover just how much they believe in their freedom of speech. I dare you all to write one more thing that you won't say to my face. Because I will make you say it. In that manner. That is a threat. Mm" [Perez Hilton]
• It seems Marilyn Manson's comments were a reaction to a recent L.A. Weekly interview that paints him as a paranoid cocaine addict and claims ex Evan Rachel Wood was nicknamed "Snowflake" because "when they played shows, she'd hold all the coke." [Rolling Stone]
• A few days before their split from Reggie Bush, Kim Kardashian said in an interview about their house hunting expedition, "I've always wanted to buy a big house myself and ... It is time for me to move. I wish my sisters could move in with me...I don't think I would ever live with someone unless I'm engaged. I'm really firm on that. I have done it before. I would tell all my friends, the best thing is to keep your independence. It feels really good to be able to buy a place by myself." Of course, People thinks this is "telling." [People]
• Hulk Hogan's divorce from Linda Bollea is nearing an end. This morning they agreed to a final settlement over their assets and Hulk told reporters, "I'm a free man." [TMZ]
• Supposedly just six months into their relationship Josh Duhamel and Fergie's relationship is on the rocks because he wants to start a family and she wants to pursue her career. "Publicly they're painting a picture of sheer bliss, but behind the scenes, cracks in their young marriage are beginning to show," says a source. [The National Enquirer]
• The Sun quoted Estelle, who sings "American Boy" as Tweeting "Rihanna just doesn't do it for me," but she says they were actually quoting one of her followers and she never insulted Rihanna. [The Daily Express]
• Ashley Jensen of Ugly Betty and her husband, actor Terence Beesley, are expecting their first child in the fall. [People]
• Ethan and Joel Coen's A Serious Man and Drew Barrymore's Whip It will premiere at the Toronto International Film Festival. [Variety]
• Warren Beatty's lawyer is arguing that it would be too expensive and inconvenient for him to travel to Delaware for the trial to settle a dispute about the movie and TV rights to Dick Tracy. [AP]
• A reporter on Good Day Scramento joked during an interview with Joan Rivers that her daughter Melissa Rivers was just riding her coattails. Joan replied: "I think we're going to end the interview right here. Don't be so fucking smart." [TMZ]
• Josh Brolin says sex with Megan Fox was "uncomfortable" ... on screen in their film Jonah Hex. [The Sun]
• Leonardo DiCaprio was spotted flirting with Ashley Roberts of the Pussycat Dolls. [The Sun]
• According to a press release from E!'s Daily 10, Kevin Federline says of his relationship with Britney Spears, "It's been really cordial, you know, thank God. We've had our rough patches, but you know, right now, we're doing great." And concerning the rumors that he'll star in a reality show about him getting back into shape, Kev says, "It would probably be pretty interesting, you know?"
• A reporter asked Nora Ephron if it's possible to achieve real happiness without butter. She replied: "I feel this way, but, you know, there are probably some people who have probably achieved happiness without it. But I feel sorry for them." [The L.A. Times]
• Dame Judi Dench was almost hit by a speeding taxi in London. The driver yelled, "You stupid cunt!" and she replied, " That's Dame Cunt to you!" [Perez Hilton]
• Diane Keaton has spearheaded a campaign to keep a developer from demolishing the Century Plaza Hotel, a curving glass and steel building made in the '60s that Keaton calls, "a sexy woman surrounded by ogling men – Sophia Loren in the 1960s". [The Independent]
• "Who's not Team Edward?" says Jennifer Love Hewitt of Twilight's Edward Cullen, "There is not a girl in the world who's not Team Edward! Have you met girls who are not Team Edward? Well, they are not girls! They're aliens from another planet who should not be allowed to exist... Listen, Edward can fly you through the forest. He's like Aladdin with vampire teeth - there's magic-carpet rides. He can sing. He can watch you sleep. He plays music. He sniffs your neck. I mean, please!" [MTV]

• Samantha Ronson reportedly returned home at 5am last night to find that Lindsay Lohan had been waiting on her stoop for hours. The paparazzi caught Linds crying, demanding to know where Sam had been, and shrieking, "I'm your girlfriend!"

• Lindsay had apparently been waiting with an anonymous friend who Sam kicks out saying, "She's on my property, I don't know her, I want her out." The girl leaves and Lindsay follows Sam into the house, slamming the door behind her. Video here: [TMZ]
• Kim Kardashian and Reggie Bush have split, reports US. "Nobody cheated," said a source. Didn't they just go to Africa together? [US]
• A car Katie Holmes was sitting in on the Australian set of Don't Be Afraid Of The Dark started sparking and burst into flames seconds after she got out due to a problem with the car battery. "Katie was very shaken by the ordeal," said a source. "She took the rest of the day off while special effects staff looked over the faults. Katie has filmed scenes since but it has made her think about her safety on set. She will be shooting the same scene at a later date." [The Daily Mail]
• "A source very, very, very, very close to Jon Gosselin" revealed exclusively to RadarOnline.com that Jon is secretly still dating both Hailey Glassman AND Kate Major." Two things: is the source "very, very, very, very close to Jon" Jon Gosselin? Also, if this is how Jon keeps a secret what's his version of a public announcement? Is he going to go door to door introducing us to his new girlfriend? [Radar Online]
• A reporter Kate Major used to intern for at Chicago Now says Kate told her she and Jon Gosselin are together but he "can't talk" right now due to his "situation," meaning his pending divorce and contract with TLC. [Chicago Now]
• Tony Romo has instructed security to keep Jessica Simpson out of his Dallas home. A sign at the entrance to his gated community reads "RED ALERT!!! TONY ROMO HAS MADE SOME CHANGES TO HIS LIST OF PEOPLE ALLOWED IN....JESSICA IS NO LONGER ON THE LIST AND NOT APPROVED FOR ACCESS." [Us]
• Here's some good news: Rihanna's rep says that though she and Chris Brown stayed at the same hotel over the weekend, it was just a coincidence and they're not back together. Maybe she can explain that concept to Robert Pattinson/Kristen Stewart fans too. [MSNBC]
• A parole hearing took place today for the man who killed Kelsey Grammer's sister in 1975 in an attempted robbery. Grammer tried to attend the hearing but his flight was delayed, so he wrote a letter saying his sister was "smart and good and decent," and "I can never escape the horror of what happened" to her ... "Please do not release this man from prison." The parole board decided Karen Grammer's murderer will stay in prison for at least another five years. [TMZ]
• Kelly Clarkson's new single "Already Gone" has the same backing track as Beyonce's "Halo" and Clarkson says it's all the her music producer's fault. "No one's gonna be sittin' at home, thinking 'Man, Ryan Tedder gave Beyonce and Kelly the same track to write to ... no, they're just gonna be saying I ripped someone off," she said. [TMZ]
• The I.R.S has filed a $7,373 tax lien against P.Diddy's Atlanta restaurant Justin's Restaurant. Diddy says it's all a big mistake: the I.R.S. was sending notices to his identically named restaurant in New York that closed a few years ago. [The Detroit News]
• Tito Jackson has confirmed that Michael Jackson's body is at Forest Lawn cemetery. [Entertainment Tonight]
• Debbie Rowe just showed up at the Beverly Hills office of her former boss Dr. Arnold Klein, supposedly to visit another doctor who works in Klein's office. [TMZ]
• Fans at a Jonas Brothers concert this weekend concluded that Joe Jonas broke up with Camilla Belle after he changed the lyrics to a few songs and appeared to cry during the song "Camp Rock." [The Mirror, Perez Hilton]
• Now Camilla Belle's rep has confirmed the breakup explaining, "There is no third party involved and they care deeply about each other and will remain friends." [People]
• BREAKING: Victoria Beckham went to dinner with her hair in a bun. [The Telegraph]
• Sacha Baron Cohen has been threatened by the group of Palestinian terrorists featured in Bruno. A representative for The Martyrs Brigades released a statement saying they are "very upset" and will "respond in a suitable way." [The Telegraph]
• Lost creators Carlton Cuse and Damon Lindelof dropped some spoilers about season six at Comic Con, which you can read about here: [N.Y. Magazine]
• We're learning more fascinating details about Jennifer Lopez's 40th birthday party on Saturday night. Liza Minnelli, Gayle King, and various Lopez family members were in attendance, and a witness says J.Lo and Marc Anthony "were affectionate with each other and obviously loving the night. Marc's arm was around Jennifer a lot, they'd give each other pecks on the face every now and then. She was clearly pleased with how the night went." [People]
• Entertainment Tonight just figured out that Mischa Barton has been released from psychiatric evaluation (even though Us reported it last week.) [Entertainment Tonight]
• Joel Madden says he's working on a memoir about his experience with kids, relationship, and moving to L.A., "but I don't want to put a book out there if it's not actually meaningful. I'm not going to go there unless I can deliver." [People]
• Robert Downey Jr. will star opposite Zach Galifianakis in Due Date, a comedy about an expectant father (Downey) trying to get to the birth of his first child. Director Todd Philips of The Hangover describes it as "a buddy comedy without the buddies." [Yahoo]
• Robert Downey Jr. said he thinks he and Jude Law have a special chemistry in Sherlock Homes, joking, "It's called circumstantial homosexuality." He added that even in real life, "We just became really close really quickly, because we just rolled up our sleeves and started working from jump." [People]
• Tobey Maguire wrote a letter to Speaker Nancy Pelosi and Senator Tom Harkin saying, "As a parent, I am contacting you because I am deeply concerned that unhealthy school lunches are contributing to our nation's childhood obesity epidemic. My wife and I just had our second child, so this issue is tremendously important to us…Let me ask you please to ensure the Child Nutrition Act provides more fruits, vegetables, and healthy vegetarian foods. Young people deserve healthful food, and I can't imagine a better investment in the future of our country." [Politico]
• "I haven't chosen any other action films since Kill Bill because I felt that everything else just sort of paled by comparison. I don't like to get lulled into some hole that I can't get out of." — Uma Thurman [The Daily Express]
• Megan Fox says she's too afraid to watch horror movies, but she enjoyed starring in Jennifer's Body because, "For me to be able to play something that I would normally be frightened by was really intriguing and interesting... It's cool to see myself being able to scare people because I'm just a little girl." [People]

• According to this report, Samantha Ronson went out with Sopranos actress Drea De Matteo last night, got into a fight with Lindsay Lohan about it, and threw LL's clothes out into the street.

Can't really tell if the supposedly illustrative pictures at the link actually reflect that, but whatever. [Daily Mail]

• Oy: Rumor has it that Kevin Federline is working with VH1 on a new reality show costarring his girlfriend, Victoria Prince, and his kids, Sean Preston and Jayden James. Just what the world needs. [E!]
• Meanwhile, Britney's conservatorship might be coming to an end, when her tour winds down in November. She seems like she's doing pretty good, no? [TMZ]
• Mischa Barton's model-centric CW show, The Beautiful Life, will go on with or without her — which means that producers are casting a new recurring character as a Plan B., in case Mischa is not ready for filming the last week of July. [EW]
• Madonna is in Marseilles, where she visited with the victims of the stage collapse which left two dead. She met with the widow of a worker and also went to the hospital where eight injured workers are being treated. [Daily Mail]
• Burn Notice actor Jeffrey Donovan was arrested for DUI in Miami Beach. Nice stubble in the mug shot. [NY Daily News]
• Jon Gosselin and Hailey Glassman were seen hanging out in an upstate New York park, and "They kept stopping to make out - and they made out a lot." [Gatecrasher]
• The reporter Jon Gosselin had dinner with over the weekend often "uses her charms" to get stories, and sometimes wears wigs when she follows celebrities, so as not to be recognized. [Page Six]
• "Are Kate Gosselin and Madonna workout buddies? The Jon & Kate star has arms that mirror Madge's." [NY Daily News]
• It's official: Emma Watson will attend Brown University in the fall. [People]
• Jennifer Love Hewitt and Jamie Kennedy: Engaged! [Page Six]
• When Heidi Klum was followed by paparazzi as she took her kids to a NYC park last week, it was other parents at the park who were pissed: They asked the snappers to leave, and when the photographers didn't, the moms and dads threw water balloons at them. [Daily Express]
• Sienna Miller has seen her GI Joe action figure, and she is not impressed. "My doll is cross-eyed and has the biggest chin you have ever seen. Action figures are always a bit off, aren't they? Oddly enough from side on, it is definitely me but front on she looks sort of possessed." [The Sun]
• Here's a video of Katherine Heigl talking about T.R. Knight going to do Broadway now that he's not on Grey's Anatomy: "That really pisses me off," she says. [E!]
• David Beckham's coach is criticizing the player for confronting jeering fans at the first home game of the season: "We appreciate our players and fans passion for the team and the game, but we all must aim to hold ourselves to higher standards." [Mirror]
• Amy Winehouse's mom says the star is on the road to recovery: "A year ago, everyone was saying: 'Will she get through this, will she even survive?' And look at her now. We've got the old Amy back. I always knew she'd come through it. And I know she doesn't want to go back to the drugs. St Lucia was good in many ways because there were no hard drugs around, but she was bored, so she drank…She's put on a bit of weight and looks better than she has in a long time… She was busy cooking, so that's a good sign that she's actually eating. I think she's pleased to be home and I know she's happier now." [Mirror]
• Bonnie Somerville played Suzie Cavandish in Labor Pains, and she says of Lindsay Lohan: "She is supertalented. I had a great time working with her." [E!]
• A balloon company sent Jennifer Lopez a giant bouquet of balloons for her twins, which she promptly sent back. Maybe the colorful arrangement was not classy enough for Jenny from the block? [TMZ]
• Re: Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson: A source says: "Tony pulled the plug because he couldn't stand the constant heat Jessica was putting on him to get married… The final nail in the coffin was an argument they had over how to celebrate Jessica's birthday. She wanted a splashy Ken & Barbie-themed bash with all of her celebrity friends, and Tony wanted a quiet, low-key dinner for just the two of them." [MSNBC via National Enquirer]
• Susan Boyle will appear in an interview on the Today show tomorrow, in which she says of sudden fame: "The impact, like a demolition ball. You know, and anyone who has that kind of impact — finds it really hard to get a head around it. I guess I had to get my head around it, but through the — the guidance of a great team, and they are very good, I was able to see that in perspective and really turn that around a little." [Reuters]
• "Harry Potter's love interest rivals Emma Watson in fashion stakes… Emma Watson finally has competition as the most glamourous Harry Potter screen siren after Bonnie Wright who plays Ginny Weasley was photographed looking equally spellbinding." [Telegraph]
• Mark Lester, godfather of Michael Jackson's children, claims that after the memorial service, 7-year-old Blanket Jackson seemed confused about what was going on. "It is obvious to me that Blanket is still unsure about what exactly happened to his father.He said, 'Where's Daddy gone? On holiday?' It was a rhetorical question and it broke my heart." [Mirror]
• The Jackson family is still "agonizing" over the decision of where to bury the King of Pop, but his body is "temporarily interred" at Forest Lawn Memorial-Park and Mortuary in Los Angeles. [People]
• Joe Jackson was on Larry King Live, where he seemed to blame Dr. Conrad Murray for Michael Jackson's death: "The doctor gave him something to make him rest, and then he don't wake up no more. Something is wrong there," Joe said. [AP]
• Another report claiming that Katherine Jackson is being manipulated to dispute Michael's will. [TMZ]
• Joe Jackson says the rumor that he wants to take Michael's kids on tour as the Jackson 3 is "a bunch of jive." And when asked if he was abusive to Michael when he was a kid, he said: "That's a bunch of bull S." [CNN]
• August 29 would have been Michael Jackson's 51st birthday, and there may be two tribute concerts at London's O2 Arena in August to celebrate. [TMZ]
• Russell Brand. Goat farming. [RussellBrand.TV]
• Ciara is on the cover of Social Life magazine, but she skipped the party for the isue in East Hampton because she had a chance to go into the studio with Justin Timberlake. Social Life editor Devorah Rose has a much lengthier explanation, which you can read at the link if you wish. [Observer]
• There was some chaos at Chace Crawford's birthday party because the prettyboy didn't want to pose for photos. What the hell are we going to paste in our scrapbooks, hmm? [Page Six]
• Will Lizzie Grubman be on Real Housewives Of New York? Short answer: No. [Page Six]
• Jorja Fox: Returning to CSI. [UPI]
• Nicolas Cage is in talks to play the villain in The Green Hornet. Cameron Diaz is negotiating to play a reporter and love interest; Seth Rogen will star. [Variety]
• Uma Thurman will star in Girl Soldier, an indie film about a cleric who helped rescue 140 schoolgirls abducted in Uganda. [Variety]
• "Tyler Perry is paying for 65 children from a Philadelphia day camp to go to Walt Disney World after reading about allegations that a suburban swim club had shunned them because of racism." [AP]
• Ryan O'Neal says he is dealing with Farrah Fawcett's death by answering condolence notes from her fans. [UPI]
• Ryan O'Neal is also spilling about what Redmond O'Neal's last words were to his mother Farrah Fawcett on her death bed, which is maybe a little too intimate. [People]
• Marissa Jaret Winokur is still blogging her "weight-loss journey," although this week, it's "I Fell Off the Diet Wagon." Tons and tons of candy, thanks to her son's first birthday party. [People]
• Jamie Waylett, who plays Vincent Crabbe in the Harry Potter movies, has been ordered to do 120 hours of community service after admitting to growing 10 cannabis plants at his mother's house. [Daily Mail]
• "Bruce Lee's older sister and younger brother have authorized a Chinese company to make a series of biographical films about the late kung fu icon, saying they want to produce a historically accurate account of their brother's life." [AP]
• Whatshisname says he and Whatshername don't let the kids see them fight. [Mirror]
• Whatshisname fell off a stage, btw. [Daily Mail]
• Blind item! "Which indie starlet secretly has a house decorated entirely with Alice in Wonderland paraphernelia?" [Gatecrasher]
• "I would daydream about it all the time. I thought about the fact that there were children who didn't have anything, and I felt like I could help. It was something that weighed on me. It was something I did for the world and for my son and then for me." — Mary Louise Parker always knew she would adopt someday. [People]
• "It was fun. It was a new experience for me just to take my clothes off on camera. So to be able to scream, to be hysterical, to act out all that suffering and all those tears… well, it's not something you get to do every day." — Charlotte Gainsbourg, on controversial and violent film Antichrist. [Telegraph]
• "I'd like to go on record that he is a gentleman. He has not touched me in a bad place once." — Judd Apatow, on Russell Brand. [Mirror]
• "It's a coincidence. It's from a book called Once is Not Enough by Jacqueline Susann. Bad book… People think that I changed my name. I could've been an actress, a superhero, or a stripper." — January Jones, on her name and being born in January. Also, click to see her on the cover of Interview! [JustJared via Interview]
• "The double-edged sword of working with family is it can be the most fulfilling experience you've ever had, but the flip side is it can also be the most tortuous and most stressful, because it's your family and the lines can get blurry." — Shaun Cassidy, who, along with brothers Ryan, David and Patrick, is starring in a new ABC Family show, Ruby & The Rockits. [LA Times]
• "Stand-up is good when you're rolling. When it goes down you feel like 'why the hell did I come here?' and the same thing in acting. If it's not clicking you feel like an ass." — Adam Sandler. [Mirror]
• "This project was rife with opportunities for me to fuck it up enormously and, by doing so, prove my own limitations. To botch the whole thing would have been calamitous." — Hugh Dancy, on Adam, the film about a man with Asperger's. [BlackBook]
• "I see a lot myself in him, he is a Cancer, just like I am. I would love to meet him. He makes me smile just when I see him." — Lil' Kim on Nelson Mandela. [Mirror]

• Chris Brown has released a video apology for assaulting Rihanna. He says: "I've told Rihanna countless times and I'm telling you today that I am truly, truly sorry...

• "Although I will do some interviews and answer some questions in the future, I felt that it was time that you heard directly from me that I am sorry," says Chris. He claims that it's taken him this long to apologize because his lawyers wouldn't let him speak about the case, but now he's asking fans to forgive him. He adds that he's in counseling and, "I intend to live my life so that I'm truly worthy of the word 'role model.'" [TMZ]
• Mischa Barton's rep says the rumors that she wound up in the hospital after a three-day coke bender, "completely preposterous." [OK]
• A source says Mischa Barton's drug and alcohol use cost her friends, including Nicole Richie. "In the last few years, her dark side has really come out," says the source. "Her friends, like Nicole, want to be supportive but they really can't be around her too much. She's too volatile. It makes us sad, but we're also like, 'Pull it together and get help already." [People]
• Austin Stark, the director of Mischa Barton's new film Homecoming says, "I'm very concerned about her... First and foremost, we hope she gets better. I don't know exactly what happened ... I wish she wasn't going through the turmoil that she is right now." [People]
• Jon Gosselin was spotted playing in the park... with his girlfriend Hailey Glassman, not his kids. The two were photographed on the swings, holding hands, and kissing. [Radar Online]
• Jackass star Bam Margera was taken to the hospital yesterday after paramedics responded to a 911 call from his Pennsylvania home for a "possible overdose." [TMZ]
• Though his mom claims he was just "severely dehydrated." [TMZ]
• Paula Abdul is mad because Ryan Seacrest has a $45 million three year deal with American Idol, but she only makes about $2 million a year. The producers want her back but now she's pretending she might not return. [TMZ]
• Simon Cowell says of Paula Abdul, "She'll be fine. She'll be on the show... I don't get a lot of say. I've just made it clear that I want Paula on the show. Full stop." [People]
• A representative for Conrad Murray, Michael Jackson's doctor, says that rumors that he isn't cooperating with the police are, "Absolutly untrue. Murray continues to cooperate fully with investigators and there have been no requests for additional interviews." [Radar Online]
• Several studios are in a bidding war over the rehearsal footage from Michael Jackson's "This Is It" comeback concert. Sony's movie studio bid $50 million for the distribution rights. [AP]
• Christina Milan says of her engagement to music producer The Dream, "We don't have [wedding] plans yet — but it hasn't [already] happened, that I can confirm. We just want to have our closest friends and family there; it's not going to be too big." [UPI]
• Demi Lovato and Miley Cyrus' brother Trace were apparently dating, but now that they've broken up Twitter has exploded with their teenage drama. Trace, Miley, their mom Tish, and Demi all posted passive aggressive Tweets. For example, in response to "mommytish"'s Tweet "It really makes me sad that most people find it so easy to hurt other people. Why is that? I never want to hurt anyone…… EVER," Miley wrote: "We can't control the path of their wicked hearts mama. All we can do is shine a light & guide their way back home. Smile mommy." [Perez Hilton]
• Organizers of the Les Vieilles Charrues festival in France say that Lily Allen pulled out of the charity concert at the last minute. On Friday she cancelled another appearance at Spain's Benicassim festival because she was sick, but she says she never agreed to do the French festival. She Tweeted: "This is rubbish, I am sorry for pulling out [of Benicassim] yesterday, I am ill though. I've never heard of this French festival." [The Daily Express]
• In a new book a doctor who tried to save Jimi Hendrix's life on the night he died says he believes he may have been murdered by having red wine and sleeping pills forced down his throat. [The Daily Mail]
• Foxy Brown is being sued for the $641,558 she owes in taxes. She allegedly stopped paying her taxes in 2003. [Contact Music]
• Tony Romo, who has been seen partying most nights since he brokeup with Jessica Simpson says, When you let your mind wander or think about other things, you're setting yourself up for failure. So I just try to stay focused. I've done a pretty good job of that this week." But, a friend says that Tony is "emotionally drained" right now. [People]
• Jessica Simpson went out with her friends on Saturday for a girls night out. She Tweeted: "Love my ladies!!!... Wish I could be with them everyday of my life. Laughter is wonderful :)" [People]
• Susan Boyle says of her rise to fame, "It's just been unbelievable, it's indescribable... I'm having a wonderful time. I don't want it to end. It's just really good. She added, "Being plucked from obscurity is a bit like going on a long journey, really; you don't know what's going to happen. You don't know how it's going to end." [The Mirror]
• Mindy Cohn, a.k.a. Natalie from The Facts of Life is starring in a new film about a straight woman with many gay friends who decides she needs to date a "fag stag," a straight man OK with her gay friends. When asked if the role was a stretch for her, she said, "In Fire Island, I was getting drinks for Calvin Klein's butt-boy... It's my life!" [The Village Voice]
• Ashton Kutcher tweeted this weekend, "Wifey just got a new haircut. What do you guys think? I love it." Then linked to a Photoshopped picture of Demi Moore with a mohawk. She replied, "I have the buzzer ready baby!" [E!]
• Here's a sampling of things people say to Seth Green at Comic-Con: "How tall are you?", "Can you sign my boobs?", "You were great as Bud Bundy." [Entertainment Weekly]
• Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick went out this weekend for the first time since they brought home their twins. They attend an AIDS fundraiser in the Hamptons. [The Huffington Post]
• A Time reporter discovered that Adrian Grenier is a member of his food co-op in Brooklyn, which requires members to work at the store for a few hours a week. When the reporter told another member that Grenier was working in the back, she had no idea who he was because she doesn't own a TV. [Time]
• At the link you can listen to the 911 call made on Friday from Nadya Suleman's house. First a child calls and hangs up without saying anything. Then when the dispatcher calls back an adult says everything is fine. Then an adult calls again and says two-year-old Caleb is "vomiting nonstop." He was taken to the hospital and released that night. [TMZ]
• Pink has rescheduled a show in Brisbane because she has laryngitis. [Brisbane Times]
• Rumors that Jennie Garth has left the new 90210 are untrue. She just signed a deal to return for multiple episodes this fall. [Entertainment Weekly]
• [The Daily Mail]
• Though her new film is all about the rules of romantic relationships, Katherine Heigl says she doesn't follow them. "I'm not very good at being a wife because I sort of break them all," said Heigl, "So does he, though, so whatever." [People]
• Chef Mario Batali has been cast in the film Bitter Feast. The film is about a celebrity chef who takes revenge on a food critic who gives him a bad review. Batali will play the owner of the chef's restaurant. [UPI]
• Here's a very lengthy description of a fan's Ed Westwick sighting. He was understandably freaked out when she walked up to him and said "I love you. And I am so sorry to bother you right now and I don't mean to freak you out but I want to enjoy my dinner but I can't even think about eating knowing you're back here and please don't leave... [N.Y. Magazine]
• You can check out the video for Coldplay's "Strawberry Swing" here: [Rolling Stone]
• Annette Merar, the first wife of Phil Spector has been reported missing from her home in Van Nuys, California. [UPI]
• "I get very dark moods for no reason. Nothing in particular brings it on. You can be having the best time of your life and yet you're utterly and totally miserable. I get very anti-social, depressed and irritable with people. I don't have time for them. I can't make phone calls and stuff. I just sit on my own for days... If I went to see a psychiatrist, it would be a long session... I've always thought that I do have a number of issues that probably need dealing with because I am quite odd in some ways." — Simon Cowell [Now Magazine]

• Yesterday afternoon the police were called to Mischa Barton's home to help with a "medical issue." Now a source says she's been placed under involuntary psychiatric hold.

The police say no paramedics were involved and her publicist added: "Police were involved due to Ms. Barton's celebrity status, to safely transfer her to medical treatment as per doctor's orders." She's allegedly being held under a 5150, like Britney Spears, and has been transferred to Cedars-Sinai Medical Center. [Perez Hilton, Access Hollywood]

• While setting up for Madonna's concert in Marseille, France, yesterday a crane collapsed killing one crew member and injuring six others. The show has been cancelled and Madonna issued this statement: "I am devastated to have just received this tragic news. My prayers go out to those who were injured and their families along with my deepest sympathy to all those affected by this heartbreaking news." [AP, Perez Hilton]
• Tony Romo was photographed partying with Jessica Simpson's sister's ex, Ryan Cabrera. [Perez Hilton]
• Orlando Bloom's Los Angeles home was robbed last night while he was in New York. The thieves took jewelry that was worth roughly $500,000. Police say it doesn't look like "a typical burglary," whatever that means. [TMZ]
• Souces say Michael Jackson's doctor, Conrad Murray, made many incriminating statements to the police on the Saturday after his death. They were surprised he spoke to them and by what he volunteered. Though some of the toxicology results aren't in yet, sources say it looks like the anesthesia Propofol was the primary cause of death. [TMZ]
• Michael Jackson's dermatologist, Arnold Klein, was forced to leave his first residency because he was selling prescription drugs to fellow students. [Perez Hilton]
• Pepsi is upset that footage of Michael Jackson's hair catching fire while shooting a Pepsi commercial was release yesterday. A spokeswoman said: "We don't know how the footage became available. Twenty-five years later, we'd question why anyone would want to share such frightening images. It was a terrifying event that we'll never forget. We were grateful for Michael's recovery and for the chance to continue working with him on a number of successful projects. As for Michael as an artist, his music helped us define a generation and, like everyone else, we're deeply saddened by his passing." [Perez Hilton]
• Michael Jackson recorded the song "A Place With No Name" but it was never released. It's unclear when it was recorded, but you can take a listen here: [TMZ]
• The band Geggy Tah has filed a lawsuit claiming that the song "All I Wanna Do (Feel Like Me)," which Pharrell produced, is a rip off of their song "Whoever You Are. [TMZ]
• Gerard Butler says of the rumors that he's dating Jennifer Aniston, "That is just annoying. People say I'm always dating so and so, and sometimes it's three people in one day. I'm trying to make movies, work hard and do my best. Then this kind of thing happens and people start to associate me more with that. It gets ridiculous." Being on the cover of Star with Jennifer Aniston isn't the worst thing that could happen to a guy with a new movie out. [People]
• Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie celebrated Knox and Vivienne's first birthday on July 12 with a family party and two cakes the other kids helped bake. [People]
• A judge changed the terms of Pete Doherty's bail today so he can go out to dinner to celebrate his sister's graduation. Doherty, who is facing drunk driving charges, has a 7pm curfew but he'll be allowed to stay out until midnight for the family gathering. [The Daily Mail]
• Jon and Kate Gosselin played outside with their kids yesterday but didn't interact much. Later Kate hauled her luggage to the car, hugged the kids and drove off leaving Jon alone with the kids. [People]
• Ivanka Trump and New York Observer publisher Jared Kushner are engaged. She Tweeted: "I got engaged last night, Truly the happiest day of my life!!!" She has said previously that she's converting to Judaism for Jared. [People]
• Farrah Fawcett received her fourth Emmy nomination this morning as an executive producer of Farrah's Story, the documentary about her struggle with cancer. [People]
• As mentioned in Midweek Madness, Kate Jackson hired a team to clean out her home because it was filled with clutter, rat dropping, and moldy food. A man on the cleaning crew who met her believes she may be abusing prescription drugs again. She has a 13-year-old son. [Star]
• Jamie Waylett, who plays Vincent Crabbe in the Harry Potter films, plead guilty today to growing 10 cannabis plants at his mother's home in London. [Reuters]
• Ashton Kutcher ruptured his eardrum during the shooting of Five Killers in the Bahamas. He was taken to the hospital for treatment and has been released. [The Daily Express]
• Tom Cruise was spotted doing the "Single Ladies" dance at a Beyoncé concert in L.A. [People]
• BREAKING: Stedman Graham, Oprah's boyfriend, was spotted riding a bike outside her home in Hawaii. [TMZ]
• Mary Carey, of Celebrity Rehab fame announced that she's married Mario Monge, Jr. who she's only known for seven weeks. What will Dr. Drew say? [Perez Hilton]
• Christina Aguilera, who was recently named global spokeswoman for the World Hunger Relief organization filmed a PSA that will air in the fall. [Perez Hilton]
• Taylor Lautner says: "The day I finished Twilight, I came home and started bulking up. For New Moon, I'm 30 pounds heavier than I was in Twilight." He adds, "I grew out of a lot of my clothes. I went from a men's small to a men's large." [People]
• Julie Delphy said her dad gave her good parenting advice after the birth of her son Leo six months ago: "He's like, 'Don't protect him too much. Get him a little dirty. Leave him in the yard a little bit... He's a French dad, you know what I mean? He's like, 'Get them a little dirty so they protect themselves from germs.'" [People]

• Is Jennifer Aniston and Courteney Cox's friendship in trouble? A source says:

"It seems like Courteney and Jen's close friendship has chilled in recent months, and it comes down to their lifestyles not gelling anymore. Jen is almost a workaholic who spends her free time dating and hunting for Mr. Right, while Courteney is happily married and busy juggling work and motherhood." [MSNBC Scoop via National Enquirer]

• Oh, God. Real Housewives' Bethenny Frankel has landed her own show, Skinny & The City. Viewers will get to see her planning her wedding to fiancé Jason Hoppy, and, presumably, learn all about her "naturally thin" recipes. [Page Six]
• LAPD were called to Mischa Barton's home in West Hollywood at 3pm yesterday to assist with a "medical issue." She was escorted from her apartment to an unknown location. Mystery abounds. [Daily Mail]
• Oh wait: Mystery solved. Mischa Barton was taken to the hospital due to complications from oral surgery. Apparently she was in too much pain to drive and asked to be take by police, hoping the paparazzi would leave her alone. She'd previously had impacted teeth that had to be removed from her jaw bones. [ONTD via RPulse]
• Mariah Carey will shill sing her new single, "Obsessed," on America's Got Talent. [UPI]
• Amy Winehouse was granted a "quickie" divorce from Blake Fielder-Civil today, on the grounds of her adultery. [Mirror, AP, Mirror]
• How is Jessica Simpson since boyfriend Tony Romo broke up with her a day before her birthday? A source says she "was really blindsided" and is "sad, mad, and confused." [People]
• Lauren Conrad wore a brunette wig for a Harper's Bazaar photo shoot and "day-long experiment." She says: "I went into a wig store and tried on a brown wig, and they all laughed at me. All these women [who worked there] were like, 'You look like Hannah Montana.' Day to day, I can only do blonde. Everything else makes me look sort of plain-Jane." [People]
• By the by, Lauren Conrad is on the cover of Shape looking a wee Photoshoppy. [Perez]
• Paris Hilton has a new driver's license photo — after posing at the DMV five times. [TMZ]
• Kim Kardashian was detained at customs in Johannesburg, South Africa, when she couldn't find her passport. She claimed that she'd left it on the plane, but officials wouldn't let her look for it. Boyfriend Reggie Bush talked someone into letting him back on the plane, where he found the passport, and all is well. Kim Reggie and Khloe had been in Botswana visiting a diamond mine in league with the Russell Simmons Diamond Empowerment Fund, FYI. [E!]
• Someone broke into Orlando Bloom's home in L.A. and stole some "personal effects." Oh, no, not the Legolas wig! Anything but that. [People]
• Lovely photographs of Richard Gere and Carey Lowell's bed and breakfast in Bedford, New York. Gere says, "We're pretty open to just letting it flow and go where it wants to." [W]
• LL Cool J had one of those travel days from hell: First his flight from L.A. to St. Louis had to make an emergency landing in Kansas City, after passengers smelled smoke. Then, once the plane landed, one of the passengers was so sick everyone had to be quarantined for 3 hours. LL ended up ordering a car service. [TMZ]
• Q: What do you think has been Harry's greatest misstep or failure in judgment? - Susan Bevins, Winter Park, Fla. A: "Susan Bevins, you have asked a question no journalist has ever asked me. I think the way he treated his friends a couple of films ago was quite questionable. They're always there for him, and he was a little bit ungrateful. I think Harry is a flawed character. He can be quite selfish and really manipulative. He's not all sweetness and light." — From "10 Questions For Daniel Radcliffe." [Time]
• Check out the cover art of Whitney's Houston's new album: She looks regal, and not at all like someone who would say "crack is cheap." [NY Daily News]
• The good news is: Michael Jackson record sales continue to soar. [NY Times]
• The bad news is: A veteran prosecutor resigned from the L.A. district attorney's office after her supervisors found out that she talked about the Michael Jackson case on Larry King Live. [LA Times]
• Meanwhile, the DEA has contacted the manufacturer of Propofol, which is thought to be the cause of Michael Jackson's death. They're going through records and vial numbers to match the drug with doctors who have a connection to MJ. [TMZ]
• "Michael Jackson's death has the FDA considering labeling Propofol a 'controlled substance.'" [NY Daily News]
• Dr. Conrad Murray's lawyer would not confirm or deny whether his client administered Propofol to Michael Jackson the day he died. [TMZ]
• Rumors that Janet Jackson wants Michael Jackson's kids persist. "Janet is not only willing to raise those children, she is also the only relative who knows how to protect them," says a source. [MSNBC Scoop via Ok!]
• A guitarist who worked with Michael Jackson hours before his death says: "It still hasn't sunk in that he has actually passed, we're still in shock. What you see on the footage is what he was like to us. That was what was so shocking for all of us. We saw him dancing and singing and interacting and joking, having a great time, so excited. He wasn't sitting in a chair coughing and looking sickly. To be with him on the night before (he died) was hard." [Mirror]
• Michael Jackson was in negotiations to purchase an assortment of celebrity nude photographs before he died — people like Marilyn Monroe, Jayne Mansfield and Bonnie Parker, of Bonnie-and-Clyde fame. [Yahoo via E!]
• Joe Jackson's business partner in his new record label served 366 days in federal prison in 2001 — for conspiracy to commit extortion. Bad news. [TMZ]
• Tito Jackson says Michael Jackson is the biological father of all of his kids: "They are all his children. Blanket is Michael's, I can tell. Those eyes don't lie. Them eyes are Michael over again. I see a lot of Michael in him." Um, okay. [Mirror]
• Kylie Minogue got separated from her boyfriend in a bar on Tuesday night, so, when she found him, he slapped him in the face with a fan. [Page Six]
• "Steven Spielberg is on the verge of completing an $825m financing for his new film venture, nine months after he began looking for capital in the worst funding market in Hollywood's recent history." [Financial Times]
• Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher lived out a 007 fantasy by vacationing at the Ocean Club resort in Barbados, where Casino Royale was shot. Ashton requested to be picked up from the airport in a silver Aston Martin! [Daily Express]
• Want Bob Dylan/Jimmy Carter gossip? Click the link. [Page Six]
• Rapper Common is being sued for sampling someone else's song, even though he doesn't deny that he sampled the work and credits the sample on the track listing. [ONTD via Hip Hop DX]
• Griffin O'Neal claims his estranged father Ryan O'Neal had an affair with Alana Stewart as Farrah Fawcett was dying. [Daily Express]
• Cheryl Tiegs and significant other Dan Buettner: Broken up. [Star-Tribune]
• Brittny Gastineau says that in her scene in Brüno — in which she says "abort the baby," she was joking around. "I was spoofing myself. When I got there, I saw him, and I obviously knew it was him. I was like, 'Oh, this is funny. This is a joke.' I just went along with it." [Us Magazine]
• A theater in Ireland has left a recorded message about Brüno on its ticket hotline, which says: "Bruno is particularly vile. It leads to a hell of a lot of complaints. It will offend every prejudice in the book, believe me, so don't come on after and tell us how horrible it was. One or two have enjoyed it, though." A spokesman for the theater says, "We often leave jokey messages." [Telegraph]
• Whatshisname thinks Whatshername has sold out by doing a tell-all interview. [Daily Mail]
• Whatshisname says living in the public eye can be a mistake. [Daily Mail]
• Blind item! "Which now-married (but then-engaged) starlet hooked up with her geeky dreamboat of a co-star on the set of their film? Wisely, they frolicked in a soundproof room." [Gatecrasher]
• "It's a funny thing because what I've found is some of the wealthiest, most powerful people in the country are watching this show. I think it's because there is an underlying smartness that a lot of people don't get that relates to how most successful people rose to the top. You need that group around you; you need a couple of breaks and good fortune. That's what we try to tap into. To have Obama say he watches and gets it — well, he's got that same crowd around him, and it was an amazing thing to hear. Hopefully, it'll keep us on — at least through next year." — Doug Ellin, creator of Entourage. [Reuters]
• "It's almost career suicide to take a break and just not release music like I did. But to have people still care, I just don't know what to say and how to explain it. I'm just so happy because it validates the music I did in my 20s." — Maxwell, who had huge first-week album sales for chart-topping release Blacksummer's night and whose single, "Pretty Wings," is also number one. [USA Today]
• "I was homely [as a teenager], painfully small, short, with too much blue eye shadow because I thought, it matches my eyes, so why not? Trying desperately to fit in." — Amy Adams. [NY Daily News via Allure]
• "I want to do great movies that are number one at the box office and also independent movies that are dark and miserable. I see myself with a career like Cameron Diaz — she does What Happens in Vegas and then My Sister's Keeper, so I want to do it all!" — Kristin Cavallari, who when asked if she wants to go back to college someday, says: "I'm really happy with what I'm doing. I read a lot of books, you know. So, no. I have no urge to go back to college." [PopWrap]
• "It's wonderful. I grew up around gay people my entire life, basically, that's possibly why I'm quite camp, and some people think I'm gay when I meet them, which I think is awesome. It's always good to keep them guessing. I don't go on any blogs or chats or anything, but my friends are demons for them, and apparently someone said 'Daniel Radcliffe is gay. He's got a gay face!' I really don't know what a gay face is." — Daniel Radcliffe loves people thinking that he is gay. [Telegraph]
• "I'll say American for now. I really have no preference, though. Nationality is nothing. It's all about the girl - but she has to be curvy!" — Daniel Radcliffe, when asked if he likes American or Brit ladies best. [Gatecrasher]
• "Everyone lies online. In fact, readers expect you to lie. If you don't, they'll think you make less than you actually do." — Brad Pitt, on online dating. [Mirror via Wired]
• "My dream role would be to play musical legend Carol Channing in a biopic of her life. I love her, I really do. she's amazing. With all the digital technology available these days, I could probably pull it off!" — Johnny Depp. [Gatecrasher]

• A source claims Tony Romo dumped Jessica Simpson so abruptly because he found messages on her phone from none other than her ex, John Mayer.

• Says the source: "They were hanging out and he picked up her phone and she got defensive about it. Tony found messages from John and went ballistic... Tony dumped her right then. He walked out and that was it." [Radar Online]
• A source says of Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson's breakup, "She was caught off guard." While poor lonely Jess has been lying low, Tony was out partying with his friends on three of the four nights since their breakup. [E!]
• Hustler has created a Lindsay Lohan parody porn called Hustler's Untrue Hollywood Stories: Lindsay Lohan. It features porn star Scarlett Fay as Lindsay and follows various events in her life such as her Marilyn Monroe photo shoot, her relationship with Samantha Ronson, and lots of sex, of course. [Fleshbot (NSFW)]
• Debbie Rowe's lawyer made the New York Post retract a story that claimed Rowe was paid $4 million by Katherine Jackson in exchange for not seeking custody of Paris and Prince. He said Rowe would not take money for giving up custody and the story "can only have been concocted with reckless disregard for the truth." [CNN]
• Police arrested two paparazzi outside Debbie Rowe's ranch in Palmdale, California after she called 911. One didn't have a driver's license and the other was riding on top of the other photographer's car. [TMZ]
• CNN is reporting that LaToya Jackson was paid for the recent Daily Mail interview in which she said Michael Jackson was murdered. Because that's the only thing that would make you doubt that interview. [MTV News]
• Someone from the L.A. County Coroner's office went to the office of Dr. Arnold Klein, Michael Jackson's dermatologist today to hunt for missing medical records. [TMZ]
• In 2005 a man filed a $120 million lawsuit against Janet Jackson because he claimed her bodyguards beat him up after he said hello to her. Today a judge threw out the case saying, "There is no evidence upon which a jury could rationally find that (Jackson's bodyguard) was the assailant, or that Jackson directed the assailant's actions or negligently failed to control him." [The Daily Express]
• The promoter of Michael Jackson's London shows wants to do a show on his birthday, August 29, featuring his brothers and possibly Janet Jackson. [The Mirror]
• Elizabeth Taylor is in the hospital and Cindy Adams wrote today that she is suffering from exhaustion because she's been crying so much after Michael Jackson's death and denied her access to their funeral pews and barred her from the events because she was Michael's friend, not theirs." Didn't Liz say she had PLANNED this surgery and it has nothing to do with MJ's death? [UPI]
• Amy Winehouse is back in the U.K. from St. Lucia. "She is good. She has been looking after herself," says a friend. "She did a lot of exercise and she has been eating better. Look at her – she is not what she was." [People]
• LeVar Bruton was injured in a five-car accident in Los Angeles. An elderly woman turned left in front of him and he crashed into her. No one was seriously hurt and Burton was treated for neck pains and released from the hospital. [People]
• Jon Gosselin lied to designer Christian Audigier so he could bring his girlfriend Hailey Glassman on a business trip to St. Tropez. "[Jon] had told me was he was going out there with his stylist," said Audigier's rep. "We said we could accommodate her going out there as long as she's bringing his biker wardrobe or something relevant - motorcycles being the key the factor in all of this." [TV Guide]
• An anonymous source says of Hailey Glassman, "She's one of those crazy party animals," who never had a steady boyfriend in college said a source, "She would probably be that type of girl who would get on top of the bar and start dancing." [People]
• David Arquette and Courteney Cox have signed on to do Scream 4. [E!]
• Another cast member has been added for The Real Housewives of Orange County, Alexis Bellino. Here's how the press release describes her: "Alexis keeps herself busy by being the best wife and mother she can, and when she does have a free moment, she likes to work out to keep herself looking and feeling her best." [People]
• Previously Morrissey cancelled some tour dates due to illness. Now he's called off two more because of "unresolvable" issues. [The Daily Express]
• Jennifer Connelly and her husband Paul Bettany play Charles Darwin and his wife in the biopic Creation, which is opening at the Toronto International Film Festival. [Yahoo]
• Ricky Gervais will star with Jennifer Garner and Tina Fey in The Invention of Lying, a film about a man who discovers everyone he knows tells the truth, and believes whatever he tells them. [Yahoo]
• Kim Kardashian Tweeted: "We are here in Botswana, South Africa! Wow what a long flight!" She's in the country of Botswana on a "humanitarian" trip. [Perez Hilton]
• George Carlin's last book, appropriately titled Last Words will be published in November. He had been working on it for the last decade. [Yahoo]
• Brandy settled a lawsuit with another survivor of her 2006 car crash. Mallory Ham, who suffered a severely broken nose, was paid an undisclosed amount. [TMZ]
• Justin Timberlake's Mirimichi gold course will open on July 25 in Memphis after a $16 million renovation to make it more eco-friendly. [AP]
• Russell Brand will host the MTV VMA Awards once again in September. "This year will be a controversy-free festival of love and discrete orgasms," he said. [The Sun]
• Jordan says of estranged husband Peter Andre: "Whatever women he chooses in his life I just hope he's happy with them. I've got no bad feelings - as long as they're girlie girls and can paint Princess's feet and hands and play all the games the kids love like I do. I've got no animosity towards Peter, I just want him to be really happy." [The Sun]
• Amy Adams, who has been engaged for a year to actor Darren Le Gallo says, "I've been really busy, and I feel like a horrible fiancée that I haven't gotten swept up in the whole idea of a wedding but I just haven't... He wants to be married... I think he was patient for the first nine months, but that we have been engaged for a year, he's sort of, you know, 'This is going to happen, right?' He understands I'm busy but he's ready. He's much more ready for kids and stuff than I am." [People]
• Clive Davis says of Whitney Houston's upcoming album, "you won't forget it after you hear it." [ABC News]
• Emma Watson says of Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince: "There's just much more chemistry, much more interaction between all the students... It was quite a different Hermione for me to play because usually she's this very tough, very stern, you know she's kind of like this ‘girl power' (character). And in this one, she's much more fragile, vulnerable. She kind of gets her heart broken a bit." [CBS News]
• "You know, I'm not really doing the dating thing. I don't feel like I'm in the world of dating. I don't feel like a young twentysomething. I'm happy working but it's not a case of 'I don't have time for a girlfriend'. I do. It's just like everyone else who's single I suppose." — Daniel Radcliffe [The Daily Express]
• Daniel Radcliffe on photographers snapping pictures of Emma Watson's undies: "I did feel bad for her. Men will never know the kind of humiliation of having an upskirt done, which poor old Emma had. We talked a few days after her birthday, and she said, 'It was awful, they were all over me. They were trying to shoot up my knickers!' It's incredibly invasive. That's why I do think it's much, much harder for girls being famous than it is for guys." [L.A. Times]

• Chace Crawford has moved out of the NYC apartment he shared with Ed Westwick and into a penthouse way downtown.

Is Chace upgrading with his Footloose money? Well, this report claims that Ed is a slob, and Chace couldn't take the mess any more. Related: Anyone want to move in with Chuck Bass? [Us Magazine]

• Bradley Cooper gave Jennifer Aniston the "let's just be friends" speech, and she is "devastated." Allegedly. Consider the source on this, and the media's obsession with painting Jen as desperate and lonely. [MSNBC via National Enquirer]
• Emmy Rossum was Tweeting about her outfit for Jessica Simpson's birthday party at noon the day of the event, not knowing it was canceled due to Jess and Tony's breakup. [Gatecrasher]
• Here's a love autopsy, titled "Jessica and Tony's Relationship: What Went Wrong?" [People]
• Hermione gone wild! Emma Watson is really changing things up: She's set to star in a "Goth-inspired" remake of Cinderella, being masterminded by Marilyn Manson. [The Sun]
• Hayden Panettiere doesn't know how to let a guy down easy: "I'm not good at learning that sometimes you don't like someone in that way - and figuring out how to deal with that. I don't want to hurt his feelings." Just say: "It's not you, its me." [The Sun]
• UK tabloid rag Heat magazine conducted a poll for "most enviable body," and, surprise, surprise: Megan Fox won. [Mirror]
• A federal judge says Survivor winner Richard Hatch can't attend the 10th anniversary edition of the reality show in Samoa, since he's under home confinement. [NY Daily News]
• Has Debbie Rowe dropped her custody fight in exchange for $4 million? [NY Post]
• Uh-oh: Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa has returned from vacation and found that the councilwoman acting as mayor in his absence was urging people to donate money for Michael Jackson's memorial. Villaraigosa says: "This is a world-class city, and we provide fire and police protection, period. The idea that we would charge the family for a funeral is nonsensical." He called the donation website "ridiculous" and shut it down. [E!, AP]
• The coroner should have results from toxicology tests and should know Michael Jackson's cause of death by next week. [NY Daily News]
• Michael Jackson's estate is being handled by two men: attorney John Branca and recording executive John McClain. But an attorney for the Jackson family says that Katherine Jackson should be treated like a third trustee. [AP]
• "One of Michael Jackson's former housekeepers told law enforcement the singer was often in such bad shape from drugs his eyes would roll back in his head." [TMZ]
• Michael Jackson had planned to channel Fred Astaire on his This Is It tour. [Gatecrasher]
• Renée Zellweger's car and driver ditched her in the Hamptons over the weekend. [Page Six]
• Dylan McDermott has a new show about undercover cops, Dark Blue, He says: "My uncle was a cop and I used to ride around with him when I was a kid. There's something so powerful about it." If he were to go undercover and target a group, he's go for "Either the Mafia or the Aryan Brotherhood. I hope I'm as brave as [my character]. I don't think I'm in the same situations, living in Brentwood. It's the housewives that will eventually take you down. They're more dangerous than any gang." [USA Today]
• Kim Cattrall and her younger boyfriend: Dunzo. [Perez]
• Denzel Washington has withdrawn from the film Unstoppable after budget and start date issues. He would have been playing a veteran engineer who tries to help a young conductor (Chris Pine) stop a runaway train. [Variety]
• Is Akon dodging legal papers in a paternity case? [E!]
• A man named Anthony Spinner claims he created the TV show Lost — 32 years ago. [TMZ]
• Overachiever! Aidan Gillen played a Baltimore mayor on The Wire, and he's actually a former Dublin altar boy. [Guardian]
• Speaking of The Wire, there was fatal gunfire at a Brooklyn bash hosted by actor Jamie Hector — who played drug dealer Marlo Stanfield on the show. Hector says: "I would like to make it clear that the shooting incident [Sunday] did not take place at my home, nor did it involve me, my wife, nor any of the invited guests. [NY Daily News]
• Check it out: Tony Curtis filled out the Proust Questionnaire. He says his greatest fear is "People might not remember me." And his motto is "Fuck 'em and feed 'em fish." [Vanity Fair]
• Trudie Styler has a fitness DVD set to Sting's mandolin music; she has transformed her physique by training for four hours a day. Nice work if you can get it. [Mirror
• Larry King's wife is up for a role in Bono's Broadway version of Spider-man. [Page Six]
• Whatshisname is accusing Whatshername of spilling private details. [Daily Mail]
• Blind item! "Which openly gay TV star likes to show off his stuff at the gym by walking around sans towel - and referring to himself as 'porn-worthy?'" [Gatecrasher]
• "You know, I'm not really doing the dating thing, I don't feel like I'm in the world of dating. I don't feel like a young twentysomething. I'm happy working but it's not a case of 'I don't have time for a girlfriend'. I do. It's just like everyone else who's single I suppose." — Daniel Radcliffe is looking for love. [Telegraph]
• "After Mad Men I got a lot of 'How dare you speak to Don Draper like that?' People — mainly women — were mad at me that I told Don off." — Patrick Fischler, who played insult comic Jimmy Barrett on Mad Men. [LA Times]
• Directors don't get better, they get worse! When you gotta go out and make a movie to pay for the kids' private school and for the three ex-wives, don't talk to me about your artistry. It's their job. I don't want to have to watch the movie I made to pay for my pool." — Quentin Tarantino plans to stop making movies when he turns 60. [Gatecrasher]
• "[In a relationship], you're probably going to drop the F-bomb once in a while. You're probably going to say some things that are kind of harsh. And you're definitely going to talk about sex. It doesn't have to be so Snow White and Prince Charming. That's my problem with a lot of romantic comedies." — Katherine Heigl. [People]

• Tony Romo broke up with Jessica Simpson the night before her 29th birthday on July 10, which is especially tragic because she had planned a Barbie and Ken themed party.

• A source said Jess had to cancel the party but she's "ok." Did the Ken costume push him over the edge? [Us]
• Madonna's daughter Lourdes was spotted wearing a SpineCor back brace, which is commonly used to treat scoliosis. [Yeeeah]
• David Beckham says rumors that he's posing in a series of sexy Emporio Armani ads with Angelina Jolie are untrue. "She's an amazing person and so is Brad. They're an incredible couple — got an amazing family. You know she wouldn't do it and I wouldn't do it. At the end of the day, I wouldn't do it because I'm married," he said. [Extra]
• Ian Halperin's Michael Jackson tell-all is coming out this week, so expect to hear more salacious details from the book, such as his claim that MJ was gay. Halperin said he's interviewed two of MJ's lovers. "He met a construction worker and fell madly in love with him," claims Halperin. "Michael would leave the house in disguise, often dressed as a woman, and would go meet his boyfriend at a motel that was one of Vegas' grungiest dives. Michael was broke. He struggled to put food on the table for his children. That was all he could afford then." [UPI]
• Sources say Debbie Rowe made a deal with Katherine Jackson that she'd give up custody of Paris and Prince as long as Joe Jackson would have no part in raising them. "The last thing she wanted was for those kids to be looked after by Joe and go through what Michael went through," said a source. "When [Rowe and Jackson] were [married], Michael poured out his heart about how much he loathed Joe for what he had done." [N.Y. Post]
• Sheryl Crow says of being Michael Jackson's backup dancer, "I like to call it magic. It's really overused where he is concerned, but I like to call it magic and I got to watch that magic every night." [CBS News]
• Michael Jackson's production company MJJ Productions has confirmed the rumors that a Michael Jackson video game is in the works. Supposedly it included MJ's voice and will be in stores by Christmas. [Mirror]
• A New York art gallery postponed an Andy Warhol portrait of Michael Jackson from the auction block. It's value was estimated at $1 million to $10 million, but the gallery wants to offer the painting to "the greatest number of prospective purchasers." [Yahoo]
• Next month Alana Stewart, one of Farrah Fawcett's closest friends, will publish a diary she kept while Farrah was battling cancer. Some of the profits will be donated to the Farrah Fawcett Foundation. [Crains]
• A judge ruled Amanda Brunfield, Billy Bob Thornton's daughter, won't be released from jail until an expert witness testifies about why there were bruises on the skull of the baby who died in her care. [The Orlando Sentinel]
• Maura Tierney has a breast tumor. She released a statement saying, "I have discovered a tumor in my breast which requires surgery. I will not know either my exact diagnosis or course of treatment until that surgery is performed." Her new show Parenthood was supposed to premiere in the fall but NBC has postponed it until 2010 so she can receive treatment. [N.Y. Times]
• Artie Lange says he doesn't know why he was charged with DUI. He claims he blew a 0.0 Breathalyzer and passed every test the police officer gave him after he rear ended another car. He says he was on his way to pick up a prescription for his sick mother. [TMZ]
• Nas has filed legal papers in his divorce from Kelis claiming he didn't get a $11 million record deal and his income is actually declining. While she says he's offered no child support for their unborn child, he says he wants to be "fully involved" in parenting the child, has already bough two cribs and a stroller, and has offered to pay $5,000 a month in child support. [TMZ]
• Megan Fox is shopping for a home in the Hollywood Hills. This weekend she looked at homes in the $2 million to $3 million range. [The Daily Mail]
• Survivor winner Richard Hatch went to prison for failing to pay taxes on his $1 million prize and is serving out the last three months of his sentence on house arrest. He's asked the court to let him participate in a 10th anniversary editor of the show to help pay the $400,000 he still owes the IRS. [E!]
• Miley Cyrus was paid $10,000 a day for voicing Bolt, but if they movie had made just $11 million more at the box office she would have made tons more in bonuses. [TMZ]
• Neil Patrick Harris will host the Emmy Awards on September 20. [N.Y. Times]
• Matt Damon will guest star on Entourage next season to raise money for his charity OneXOne. You can read spoilers here: [People]
• Natalie Portman has been cast as the female lead in the comic book movie Thor. Chris Hemsworth will play Thor and Kenneth Branagh is directing. [Hollywood Reporter]
• Holly Madison and Jason Statham were spotted hanging out in Las Vegas over the weekend. Elsewhere in Vegas, Leighton Meester performed songs from her upcoming album. [E!]
• Also spotted this weekend in Vegas: Evangeline Lilly, Dominic Monaghan, and his parents. [Just Jared]
• After many teenagers were turned away from Bruno this weekend, a version has been created for teens 15 and older. Only 1 minute and 50 seconds are missing from the 15+ film, which marks the first time two versions of a film have appeared in U.K. theaters. [BBC]
• Michelle Pfeiffer says maintaining her figure means limiting herself. "I'm not allowed to do those fancy foods, especially while shooting. At that time, I'm given certain portions. Meted out quantities. Like when we filmed Chéri in Paris, I did not partake of those sauces." [The Telegraph]
• Molly Ringwald gave birth to her twins, Adele Georgiana and Roman Stylianos last week. [ONTD]
• Mira Sorvino gave birth to her third child with her husband on June 22. His name is Holden. She says, "He is my miracle baby. With everything that threatened this pregnancy and both of our lives, he came out of it completely unscathed: perfectly healthy, beautiful and wonderful!" [People]
• Kelly Bensimon is coming back for season three of RHONY, but it's unclear which of her costars will join her. "I am coming back," said Kelly. "But I actually don't know who else is coming back. They don't really tell me." [People]
• Dylan McDermott says he became an actor because of his step-mother, Eve Ensler. He says Ensler, who married his dad when he was 15, "instantly said that I should be an actor" because she "saw something" in him. [AP]
• "Now I've got this moniker that I'm the foot-in-mouth gal, and I keep thinking, In what way? Because I said something you don't agree with? Because I said something you don't like? I'm just telling you my opinion. I hate the idea that I can't be honest about how I feel about things because it's going to piss somebody off who feels differently. That seems preposterous to me." — Katherine Heigl [ONTD]
• Kathy Griffin beat out Lisa Rinna and Tara Reid to win a "Who's Got A Hot Bikini Bod" poll on People.com. "I voted for myself obsessively – I mean many hundreds of times," says Griffin. "Then I called my mother and had her vote, and then I had the staff drop all other work so they could do nothing but vote for me... Finally, at 48-years-old I am seen as a stupid shallow sex object," she says. "That's right: there are guys now that are not gay – well as far as I know – that want to [sleep with] me, who don't think I am funny, or even smart. They just think I have a hot body and I'm all for that." [People]
• "I wasn't trying to be a role model with The Dutchess," says Fergie, but after "seeing little girls in the audience with their moms. [It] made me think about what I do onstage a little bit more. I had to watch my mouth, because it can be filthy." [People]
• "If David Beckham had of spoken out about Iraq it wouldn't have happened, I honestly believe that hand on heart, or Britain certainly wouldn't have got involved... Beckham's cultural gravitas was as such in that period that if he'd have gone 'I don't want this war in Iraq, it's an awful thing, we should not do it', it wouldn't have happened, the public would've gone mad against it. But because he kept his gob shut, and everybody else did, it happened, we sleepwalked our way there." — Jon McClure of Reverend And The Makers. [The Mirror]

• Christian Bale looks dirty and hot on the cover of the new EW! Inside, he talks about that infamous rant that was so popular it got turned into a dance remix:

''I don't care to go into details because, you know what, I don't believe in making excuses,'' he says. ''It doesn't matter. It was unacceptable. I went too far. And I learned from it.'' He continues: "I was surprised at myself hearing it back. These things happen, and you don't realize how long you're going in the heat of the moment. I would just say: inexcusable, my fault, yes, I did it, no excuses." As for apologizing on the radio, he did so because: "I was being told how it had gone like wildfire, and I was worried that it could completely overwhelm the movie itself. There's so much hard work that's gone into this. We had 77 days of smooth running and four minutes of me just going way too far - and that shouldn't characterize the making of the movie. My concern was that people would unfairly judge the movie based on my bad behavior." More at the link! [EW]

• Uh-oh: Gerard Butler has been charged with misdemeanor battery after a "run-in" with a paparazzo on October 7. He's not required to appear in court. [USA Today]
• Natalie Portman is still seeing Sean Penn, and just bought a gothic mansion in L.A. What does it mean? [Page Six]
• The uncle and grandmother of the little girl Madonna was trying to adopt are seeking legal action against the man who claims he is the child's father. [Mirror]
• Terry Gilliam is hoping Heath Ledger will will a second posthumous Oscar for his film, The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus. [NY Mag]
• Christian Bale says his daughter will not be an actress: "Amateur is absolutely fine, but no way professionally. I've seen the way that unfortunately some kids are unhappy in those situations. There's no way I'd put my daughter through that." [Daily Mail]
• Ben Stiller, his wife Christine Taylor and Ricky Gervais toured the White House yesterday. President Obama was in New Mexico. [Reuters]
• Oprah now has 1 million followers on Twitter. Are you one of them? [Business Insider]
• It seems that Britney's dad punched Sam Lutfi in the chest at some point last year, but he was "provoked" and trying to "protect" Brit. [TMZ]
• Of course TMZ has screen shots from the surveillance video of the attempted break-in at Lindsay Lohan's house. If you want to see a Dodge Magnum station wagon and two guys doing something shady, go ahead and click. [TMZ]
• "Lindsay Lohan finally lands another acting gig - but can she behave on set?" [NY Daily News]
• Will Pink and Carey Hart have another wedding, even though they never really got divorced? "I love a party," Pink tells Ellen. [People]
• Magician Criss Angel is an alleged cat thief. [Page Six]
• Kelly Osbourne has written a book! "It's more of a self-help book for young women, the 13 major things that will happen to you before you turn 21 and what I did - most of them not right - and my advice and what I would have done differently." [Mirror]
• This was in Midweek Madness, but here it is again: Ashlee Simpson is pregnant with her second child. [PopCrunch]
• Guess who is getting a role in a West End musical, thanks to Andrew Lloyd Webber? Ms. Susan Boyle. [Telegraph]
• Why did Shanna Moakler resign from the Miss California USA Organization? "The turning point for me, I guess, was when I was watching the Today show and [Carrie Prejean] was sitting there continuing to lie. And it's obvious to everybody that the lying is still going on. I just couldn't stand behind her." [Yahoo News via E!]
• Do what you must to prepare yourself: Coming in 2011? Bridget Jones The Musical. [Daily Mail]
• Jane Krakowski wants Barack Obama to be on 30 Rock: "We've had Steve Martin. We've had Oprah. We've had Jerry Seinfeld. We've had all these great musical greats. Let's just go for the big guns now." [E!]
• Speaking of 30 Rock, Judah Friedlander and Alec Baldwin are both working on interesting side projects. [NY Times]
• Last week's "Motherlover" video Andy Samberg made with Justin Timberlake wasn't finished until 3 a.m. Saturday — hours before it would air. Samberg hopes to make a video with host Will Ferrell this week! [USA Today]
• What's this? More Scrubs? With Zach Braff and Sarah Chalke signing on? [E!]
• Ew: "Desperate Jordan has sent hubby Peter Andre a string of begging text messages pleading: 'If you let me come back I'll be like a wild animal in bed again.'" [The Sun]
• Eighteen years after winning an Oscar in Silence Of The Lambs, Sir Anthony Hopkins will play Hannibal Lecter again. Will Cate Blanchett play the FBI agent? [Daily Express]
• The Jonas Brothers have postponed shows in Mexico because of the swine flu. [Reuters]
• This article has interesting details about Steven Soderbergh's new film, The Girlfriend Experience; some scenes were improvised: "For instance, a scene where Mr. Santos's character interviews for a job at a gym was done in a single take. Mr. Soderbergh says he simply set up two cameras and instructed Mr. Santos and the gym's actual manager to do a mock interview. 'I just said, 'try and get a job from this guy. See if you can convince him to give you a job.' The exchange lasted about eight minutes, and was edited down to a one minute scene in the final version of the film. 'My experience has been, the more takes you do, the worse it gets,' says Mr. Soderbergh." [WSJ]
• California health regulators have fined the hospital where employees snooped in the medical records of Nadya Suleman, to the tune of $250,000. [LA Times]
• Erin Lucas, who is Whitney Port's BFF on The City, is talking shit about Kristin Cavallari, new star of The Hills. Lauren is such a genuine girl. She wears her heart on her sleeve, and she was real with the whole thing. I don't think Kristin is on that level. Wasn't Kristin like all gung-ho about being an actress? I mean, I read interviews last week, for that matter, where she's quoted making fun of the show and trashing it and saying she would never be a part of it. So to go from trashing a show, to go on and replace the girl you fucked over in high school…I don't see it going anywhere pretty." And who are you again? [E!]
• Lyrics from Peaches (not Geldof — electro Peaches!): "I drink a whiskey neat/You lick my crow's feet/Coming up to see me like I was Mae West/less like Tina/but I'm simply the best/Call me Robyn Cradel/baby baby be my guest." In this interview, she says: "I'm going to make aging cool." [NY Daily News]
• Holly Madison will replace Kelly Monaco in the "sultry" Las Vegas revue, Peepshow, which Mel B. also appears in. Although there are topless dancers in the show, neither Mel nor Holly will be barechested. [People]
• "Why George Harrison begged one young fan to stop throwing Jelly Babies at The Beatles." [Daily Mail]
• Farrah Fawcett loves Van Morrison, so the musician filmed his recent shows so he could give copies to Fawcett to watch while she's home in bed, fighting cancer. [E!]
• "Farrah's Story is as much about becoming aware of our own mortality as it is seeing a cultural icon fight the disease." [MSNBC]
• Even though they have been together for nearly 20 years, Ryan O'Neal and Farrah Fawcett never got married, but he says he would do it now: "She's still a little bit hesitant. I'm working though, I'm working." [Mirror]
• Ryan O'Neal says of Farrah: "I kind of wish that she would go to sleep, just go to sleep. It's not my right, but I just don't see how she could be happy." [NY Daily News]
• Candy Spelling has known Farrah Fawcett for over 30 years — Aaron Spelling produced Charlie's Angels — and Candy says of Farrah Fawcett's cancer: "When I first heard, I don't know if it was a year or two years ago when we first heard, and I contacted her. I hadn't talked to her in a while. She said, 'I'm going to be alright, Candy. Everything is going to be all right.'" [CNN]
• Anna Friel of Pushing Daisies will play Holly Golightly in a new stage adaptation of Breakfast At Tiffany's in London. [Variety]
• Blind item! "Which troubled young starlet was caught doing lines with her new bestie at a hot NYC club?" [Gatecrasher]
• "I probably haven't worn my heart on my sleeve like this since the second Cranberries album." — Dolores O'Riordan. [USA Today]
• "I wasn't intending to do a popular television series. I was intending to do film and theatre. I got waylaid a little. Since that's over, I've got back to doing what I originally intended to do." — Gillian Anderson, whom you may know as Dana Scully, but who is starring in A Doll's House on the stage in London. [Daily Express]
• "I really believe on a daily basis that there's a line of communication between me and my dogs which we haven't defined yet. I really talk to them. And I also talk to my guinea pig, Mr James, every single morning. I sit and watch him on that wheel every day, trying to answer the question that is: 'Do they do it for exercise? Or do they think they're going to reach a destination?' Because that's a terrible metaphor for all of us. Because that's all life is perhaps? Nobody is gonna tell you the truth like I do." — Dustin Hoffman. [Independent]
• "I think Dan Brown is a terribly bad writer, but he has cliffhangers after every chapter which makes you continue reading. It's like eating peanuts at a bar. You don't like them, but you keep on eating them anyway." — Stellan Skarsgard, who only took a park in Angels & Demons because the script was different from the book. [Newser via AP]
• "To me, 10 o'clock is like the new 11:30. I hear more and more people, even young people, say 'I can't stay up past 11. I car pool, I gotta get up at 6.'" — Jay Leno. [CNN]
• "He always had the most ridiculous fashion. When it came to hairstyles he would have blow-dried hair like the Bay City rollers, then an awful perm. When he was 14 he tried to grow a moustache." — Simon Cowell's brother Nicholas. [The Sun]
• "Her boyfriend Tony Romo is one of my favourite quarterbacks. So I felt kinda conflicted doing the Jessica thing. Jessica got fat. I mean, not really fat, but she certainly got fat for, well, Jessica Simpson. I've always wanted people to be able to look at each video and go 'oh remember what was going on at that moment.' You know what I mean? 'Oh, that's when Jessica Simpson got fat, oh OK.' And even if she gets thin again, that's fine. Just for that moment in time, she was fat." — Eminem. [Mirror]
• "People were telling me, 'Christian, you're too good for Terminator.' And I'm thinking, I'm too good? I'm not a snob. I really fucking enjoy watching a good action movie. Who do you think I am?!'' — Christian Bale. [EW]
• "Being a mom makes me feel whole and like I understand the meaning of life." — Rebecca Romijn, to In Style. [People]

• A stupid psychic has made some predictions for 2009: Michelle Williams will wed Neil Patrick Harris, Jen and Angelina will co-star in a movie and Tina Fey will fight Sarah Silverman. [Page Six]

• Matt Dillon was arrested in Vermont last night for excessive speeding. He was going 106 m.p.h. on Interstate 91. [WCAX]
• After only six episodes, MTV has decided to pull 50 Cent's bizarre/just plain terrible Apprentice knock-off, The Money and the Power. We never thought we'd say this to anyone but: 50, stop trying to be P. Diddy. [Perez Hilton]
• Speaking of Puff: he's telling British newspapers that he wants to be the US's first black James Bond and that he thought he was dreaming when Obama was elected POTUS. [Times UK]
• The BBC decided to pull Paul McCartney's squeaking, "trans-racial" impersonation of Michael Jackson during a recent interview because it might been seen as offensive. [Telegraph]
• OMG: Mariah Carey is currently in talks to make a Broadway musical about her life. She has been considering Vanessa Hudgens, Eva Longoria and Leona Lewis to play her in the sure-to-be-amazing production. [Telegraph]
• JLo and Marc Anthony fought divorce rumors by jetting off to Puerto Rico for a few days of snuggling. [E! Online]
• Earl "DMX" Simmons plead guilty to three different cases (including one count of cruelty to animals and various drug charges) in Maricopa County whilst wearing classic prison stripes. He will receive a minimum of 90 days in prison and he will not be allowed to own pets during his probation. [TMZ]
• Trading Spaces interior designer Doug Wilson was arrested on Tuesday in Illinois for a DUI. [UPI]
• William Balfour was in a Chicago court yesterday for his involvement in the Hudson family murder case. [E! Online]
• Mercury-tainted actor, Jeremy Piven, has apparently found love with a model-cum-waitress whom he met at Britney Spears' birthday bash. [NYDN]
• Nicole Richie and Joel Madden are reportedly expecting another baby! [Star]
• Here's a video of Lil' Wayne hilariously falling during a recent concert. [Perez Hilton]
• For some reason, the Associated Press is reporting on Gary Coleman and how he has some run-ins with the law in Santaquin, Utah, where he has moved to "escape the paparazzi and autograph seekers." [AP]
• One of the boats that was used in the filming of On Golden Pond has been put up on eBay. The current high offer is $35,910. [UPI]
• Michael Flatley, the Irish-American dancer of "Riverdance" fame, is back on stage after suffering from a "mystery virus" for years. [Reuters]
• A woman who may have been unwillingly used as a decoy for Jamie Lynn Spears at LAX is pissed off and has filed a claim for money with the city. [TMZ]
• Charles Barkley was arrested on suspicion of DUI in Arizona but he was quickly released. [TMZ]
• Jennifer Garner was seen grabbing coffee with sex therapist Dr. Holly Hein in Brentwood, CA. Uh, interesting?[JustJared]
• Hey! My hometown is in the news! For, uh, booking a Miley Cyrus NYE concert at a local high school? But it's for a gal who has worked hard for breast cancer awareness, so that's nice. [E! Online]
• Justin Bobby and Audrina Patridge enjoy what are probably the last few minutes of their 15 minutes of fame by awkwardly couch-dancing at an "eco-friendly hot spot" in LA. [People]
• Lezebels of 2008, Sam Ronson and Lindsay Lohan, basked in their new titles in South Beach. Sam is doing "much better" after her brief hospital visit. [People]
• Jessica Simpson rushed to the side of her injured beau, Tony Romo, after he collapsed in the shower of his team's locker room after the game on Sunday. [People]
• Ticket sales are down for Elton John's televised NYE bash. Looks like Elton can't back an arena like he used to. [The Sun]
• The title of this video: "Cloris Leachman, Raw and Unclothed." [Extra]
• Dane Cook's brother was arrested by Massachusetts State Police for allegedly stealing millions from his "comedian" brother. Ugh, Dane Cook is the worst, but it sucks when you can't even trust your family anymore. [TMZ]
• Robert Plant was honored by Queen Elizabeth on Wednesday. [Reuters]
• Ho ho ho: Amy Winehouse was spotted frolicking with her hotel's Santa Claus in the Caribbean. [The Sun]
• Try to hold back your disappointment, ladies: Criss Angel and Holly Madison have been spotted looking at engagement rings in Las Vegas. [E! Online]
• Rita Cosby, who alleges that Anna Nicole Smith's former lovers Larry Birkhead and Howard K. Stern had a homosexual tryst, responds to defamation lawsuit filed by Stern by saying there isn't anything defamatory about calling some dude gay. [TMZ]
• The indie band Dead Man's Bones, of which actor Ryan Gosling is a member, have released a MP3 on their MySpace. [JustJared]

• As part of his ongoing campaign to be named "classiest new dad in America," Pete Wentz has announced that he's tried wife Ashlee Simpson's breast milk, and he thinks it tastes "weird" and "sour." [Babble]

• This morning it appeared that Jennifer Aniston had beaten the Jolie-Pitts once and for all since her dog movie earned $10 million more than Brad's possibly Oscar-worthy film over the weekend. But now reports are surfacing that Jen's romance with John Mayer is on the rocks again. The recent uncharacteristic PDA was just a stunt to promote her film and the two spent Christmas on separate coasts. So, point Jolie-Pitts? [The Daily Mail]
• Star reported earlier today that Tara Reid was offered free rehab at Promises as a publicity stunt to drum up business for the $1,600 a night facility. But Promises has issued a statement insisting the story is untrue and demanded Star take the story down. [Perez Hilton]
• The REPCA has started a "fact-finding exercise" to determine if Prince Edward struck his Labrador retriever after photos of him possibly hitting his dog with a walking stick surfaced. Buckingham Palace claims the prince was just waving his stick to break up a fight between his two dogs over a dead pheasant. [BBC]
• Joe Francis is being sued by the man who bought his $6.5 million house because Francis and the subsequent owner did not disclose that the house had problems with the decks, the paint, the caulking, the walls, and the windows. Francis, who just flipped the house and never actually lived there, said, "I'm sorta bummed out that it might cost me $3 million and I never got to have one naked girl in that jacuzzi." Yeah, we're crying for you Joe. [TMZ]
• In these photos Prince Harry demonstrates his awesome beer bong technique, proving he's got what it takes to assume the British throne if necessary. But he's got some competition — no one chug-a-lugs like Lizzie II! [TMZ]
• Dallas Cowboys' quarterback Tony Romo collapsed in the locker room shower after a losing game on Sunday. Medical staff were on hand and he walked out of the locker room on his own, but he needed help leaving the podium at the press conference afterwards. Somehow, this must be Jessica Simpson's fault. [Perez Hilton]
• Zooey Deschanel is engaged to a rocker, but which one is unclear. Earlier today In Touch reported that AFI bass guitarist Hunter Burgan was the lucky man, but now Us claims they were lying! She's actually engaged to Death Cab for Cute front man Ben Gibbard. We say whichever dude you're marrying, congrats! [Just Jared, Us]
• Apparently, Regis Philbin's son from his first marriage, Dan, suffers from a spinal cord defect and had his legs amputated years ago. Now he's been unemployed for three years and his family is so poor that his wife has turned to the National Enquirer to beg her ostensibly stingy father-in-law for money. Something tells us Reeg won't be chatting about his adorable family troubles on air tomorrow with Kelly. [Perez Hilton]
• Jude Law spent his 36th birthday today with ex-wife Sadie Frost, adding fuel to the rumors that they've rekindled their romance. The two are spending the Christmas break together in sexy Rio de Janeiro ... with their three children. [This Is London]
• After starring working together on The Spirit, Samuel L. Jackson and Scarlett Johansson are officially BFF. [The Star]
• Clint Eastwood, 78, says it's hard for him to find sufficiently "edgy" acting roles, so he may stay behind the camera for a while. He's already working on directing a film about Nelson Mandela starring Morgan Freeman. [CNN]
• For those of you aware that Sienna Miller's nude photo co-romper Balthazar Getty is on Brothers & Sisters, he may be leaving the show. [E!]
• J.Lo's publicist says she and husband Marc Anthony are fine and they went shopping together last week. So obviously all those rumors that they're breaking up are just damn dirty lies. [E!]
• Finally, we're not sure what to make of this: Britney is in India with choreographer Sandip Soparrkar. This is supposedly what she had to say: "Rajasthan is an amazing place, and I feel like an Indian princess in this ghagra-choli with gold work that Sandip gifted me.” She adds, “Sandip and I have decided to spend New Year together. I wish the media would not probe our relationship till we wish to bring it out in the open.” Yes, the princess part is straight Britney, but we somehow doubt these actual words came out of our Brit Brit's mouth. Is it possible the Times of India didn't know the proper translation for "y'all"? [Times of India]