[Shanghai, November 19. Image via Getty]

A woman (2nd L) waits in front of public toilets in Shanghai during the World Toilet Day on November 19, 2009. The World Toilet Organization, the drive to improve sanitation around the globe founded in 2001 with 15 members and now having 151 member organizations in 53 countries, declared its founding day on 19 November, as World Toilet Day. AFP PHOTO / PHILIPPE LOPEZ (Photo credit should read PHILIPPE LOPEZ/AFP/Getty Images)

It should, because almost the exact same thing happened in February, 2008. Last year, a woman gave birth on a train, passed out, and her baby fell through the chute and onto the tracks, where she lay for almost two hours. The mother and her husband got off at the next station, alerted the guards, and went back to retrieve her miraculously alive child.

This time, the story is a little different. Rinku Rai was on her way with her husband and 4-year-old daughter to stay with relatives. She went into the train bathroom and reports feeling "mild pain," before "the baby came out, chord, placenta and all," she said. "But before I could realize what had happened, it slipped through the hole. I became hysterical, came out of the toilet and jumped from the train." Another passenger on the train assumed that Rai was trying to commit suicide, and she pulled the emergency brake. The train came to a halt a mile from where Rai had lost her baby. When passengers finally found her, Rai was sitting on the tracks, unharmed, cradling her newborn child.

The Independent notes that this is "not the first such incident on an Indian train." Which leaves us with some questions: How can a thing like this happen twice? Do these women not have the proper access to prenatal care? Is it pure coincidence, or a symptom of a larger problem? It's obviously a wonderful, amazing thing that these infants survived such an ordeal, but perhaps the bigger question is how do mothers end up in this position in the first place?

Baby Arrives By Train, Falls Down the Toilet - And Lives [Independent]

Related: Major Miracles

7. Boys - read: not little boys, not boys who need supervision, but boys old enough to leer - in the ladies' room. Says Hortense, "Find a family restroom now, or find a family therapist later, know what I'm sayin?"

6. Wet toilet paper. Says Tatiana, "I just hate life whenever some thoughtless prick has got all the toilet paper wet, like by leaving the roll in a floor puddle." Clawing a dry hunk off is not an appealing option.

5. Toilet paper, everywhere. Where does it come from? When a toilet won't flush, is it considered some kind of tacit signal to drop an entire roll's worth of paper in the bowl and drape the remainder over the sides and floor, just so no one will try to use it? Is it a "seat-covering" run amok? Is it to cover evidence? And why does this happen so much? In any given ladies' room, at any given time, at least one stall will be out of commission due to t.p.

4.T.P. Sabotage. Says Margaret, "it's irritating when someone makes eye contact with you as they're walking out of the stall, sees you go in, and still fails to say 'btw, there's no toilet paper.' Talk about a solidarity fail! Are they too refined to say "toilet paper?" Do they go by the hazing system, rationalizing that if they suffer, you should too? Where does the madness end?

3. Not flushing. Would it kill collective womanhood to make sure everything's gone away? I'm not saying it's a scenic view, but think of it as a public service; maybe your at-home facilities are completely reliable, but not all toilets are created equal. (Anyone who's grown up in a house with dud plumbing is neurotic about this, as I know all too well.) Often a stall will be considered "out of order" for hours before a cleaner or someone has the gumption to actually flush the toilet, proving nothing's wrong. As Anna points out, no toilet paper in evidence - in either toilet or stall - makes this even grosser.

2. Used Pads/Tampons shoved behind seat/paper dispenser. Periods? Great. Strangers' used sanitary products? A bridge too far. As Margaret adds, "sometimes there's no trash bin in the stall, which is annoying too, but in that case I think wrapping it in toilet paper and carrying it to the garbage next to the sinks is a more sanitary option." Tatiana also calls out those tampons "wrapped and dropped on the wet floor so they make red ink blots."

1. Pee on the seat. Let's make that "liquid," actually. Says Dodai, "blood or urine on the seat is basically like saying FUCK YOU." We get it: you don't want to touch the seat. We're glad you're so sanitary, you've screwed the rest of us. As Megan puts it, "how hard is it to kick the seat up with your shoe and hover over the bowl?"

In Japan, "toilet poems" are part of a new effort to make squatters consider their toilet paper usage. The Japanese Toilet Labu (I took Japanese in college, so I know this roughly translates to: Japanese Toilet Lab) research center is putting poems like, "that paper will meet you only for a moment" and "love the toilet" at eye-level in public bathroom stalls. It's genius, really. Perhaps if we all thought of toilet paper in a more poetic manner — considered each and every square like, say, a goodbye kiss experienced in the last, lingering days of an extraordinarily beautiful autumn — the world would be a better place?

Of course, being frugal with the bath tissue can be taken too far. Take the cautionary tale of Amador Bernabe, who may have been fired from his job at an Australian engineering firm because he chose to abstain from toilet paper altogether. This story, besides being completely disgusting, is an important lesson for us all. There CAN be downsides to conservation.

Finally, back to America, where TP sales are actually down 5.5 percent. According to Kimberly-Clark Chairman-CEO Tom Falk: "[Americans] are conserving cash and don't want to build any household inventory."

This, of all today's toilet paper news, I find the most shocking. And sad. Are any of you actually rationing your squares? Because I know I never feel more American — hell, more alive — than when I'm clutching a really excessive fistful of Charmin.

Japan Group Launches "Toilet Poems" to Save Paper [Reuters]
Townsville Engineering Firm Denies Worker Sacked Over Toilet Habits [News.com.au]
Even Toilet-Paper Sales Suffer in Recession [AdAge]

What On Earth is a mini-format catalog that somehow manages to pack about 700 products into its 127 pages. (And that's not even counting the vast selection of T-shirts with slogans like "Behold…Fartacus" which is available for $18.95.) They sell stuff like that beer-holder hoodie that Santa is wearing on the cover. I got on their mailing list after I ordered this pillow, which I actually highly recommend, because it's really comfortable, and makes sleeping on planes bearable even though people literally laugh at you when they walk past.

Even though there are almost too many items to keep track of, I did notice a recurring theme throughout: Hard-to-find, novelty toilet accessories.

Talking Toilet Paper Roll, $24.95
Give this to: Friends who forget stuff when they're in the bathroom sometimes.

Toilet Paper with the Name "Bob" Printed All Over It, 2 rolls for $12.95
Give this to: Your favorite Bob.

Ghoulie-esque Practical Joke, $16.95
Give this to: Your office Secret Santa that you secretly hate, because it's the only thing you can give them that you put in a toilet that probably won't get you fired.

Headless Cat Rug & Matching Cat Head Toilet Seat Cover, $24.95
Give this to: Your Nana.

Headless Flamingo Rug & Matching Flamingo Head Toilet Seat Cover, $24.95
Give this to: Your other Nana that moved to Florida.

Guitar Toilet Handle, $49.95
Give this to: Your little brother, who just got his first apartment off-campus, even though he'll never bother to take it out of the box, because he will still find use for it that way, as a surface to break his weed up for a joint.

Skull Toilet Brush Holder, $39.95
Give this to: Your neighbor with the black light posters.

Auto-refresher Dog Bowl That Looks Like a Toilet Bowl, $24.95
Give this to: Your uncle that never married.

We're ashamed to admit it, but we're actually kind of obsessed. [Fish and Flush]