You know your campaign's in trouble when you run on promises of not acting in accordance with your honest-to-goodness beliefs if elected. But that's what Paul Ryan did earlier today during an TV interview during which he tried to distance the Mitt Romney/Paul Ryan ticket from, uh, Paul Ryan.

Oh goddamnit, America, WHY do you keep asking Kirk Cameron questions? The man literally believes that during his lifetime he and all his best fwiends are going to be whisked up to a magical slumber party in the sky, while the rest of us are stuck down here on earth fighting an undying army of frog-dragons. BECAUSE OF…

Todd Akin is telling you, he's not going. You're the best country he's ever known. There's no way he's going to ever go. No no no no way. No no no no way he's living without you. He's staying. He's staying. And you, and you, and you. You're gonna love him. You're stuck with this bastard, America! He's not dropping…

When Todd Akin said that he learned from "doctors" that women's reproductive organs can stop themselves from getting pregnant from "legitimate rape" (sort of like high tech, high security spy facilities that women can control with their minds) the world balked. What doctors? Dr. Spaceman? Dr. Nick? Dr. Pepper? Dr.…

Since Todd Akin was more than willing to share his "scientific" knowledge of rape with a (mostly) nonplussed American public, it seems only fair that some legitimate medical doctors should get a chance to perhaps offer a more erudite perspective. Akin's claim that "the female body has ways to try to shut that whole…

The Republican party renews its official platform support for a "human life amendment" to the Constitution every presidential election season, much like normal folks who automatically renew their passport or insurance plan without thinking too much about it. Enduring protection of unborn children? Check! Soundbite…

Todd "Legitimate Rape" Akin is so, so sorry. He's so unbelievably, self-flagellatingly remorseful that he has released a new ad begging voters' forgiveness, claiming he used the "wrong words in the wrong way." But that's not enough for top GOP officials, who are trying to come in and shut that whole thing down. Guy…

After Politico reporter David Catanese had a little Socratic dialogue with himself and Twitter about the merits of Todd Akins' concept of "legitimate rape," Politico editors have decided it's best if Catanese maybe doesn't cover any more Akin-fallout news.

Missouri Democratic Sen. Claire McCaskill probably helped Rep. Todd Akin achieve greater political prominence when she decided that it'd be better to face a six-term congressman in the looming Missouri Senate race than an opponent who didn't have a previous voting record to criticize. With tea-party fervor strong in…

As we're all well aware by now, Rep. Todd Akin—Missouri republican and fucking genius—learned "from talking to doctors" that ladies' uteruses are literally roach motels for rape-sperms. Wow, a person really can learn a lot of stuff from talking to doctors! Check out this fledgling tumblr, which takes a look at some…

The rumor mill has been chug chug chugging this afternoon with reports that many important suit wearers think Missouri Republican Senate nominee Todd Akin should withdraw from the race. According to one senior GOP official, tomorrow his campaign will announce that it will, to borrow a phrase from Akin, "shut that…

Yesterday, Missouri Rep. Todd Akin, Republican Senate nominee and member of the House Science, Space and Technology committee, said pregnancy from rape was "really rare" because "if it's a legitimate rape, the female body has ways to try to shut that whole thing down." Akin quickly said that he "misspoke," but he…

Today, the pro-choice, pro-lady Political Action Committee EMILY's List is launching a tool that will make you simultaneously proud to be a woman and terrified of an America where women aren't given a chance to lead. It's called The Impact Project, and it traces the role Democratic female lawmakers have had in passing…