Label Closures

Christian Lacroix's namesake house teetered on the brink of collapse for the better part of this year. After filing for bankruptcy in Paris this May, owners the Falic Group announced a "restructuring" plan that would see the couture house shuttered, and the Lacroix name live on only in ready-to-wear and accessories licenses. After it became known that the house of Lacroix had never turned a profit in 22 years of operation, Christian Lacroix told the press he was "too angry to cry," and that he had been working without pay for over a year.

A frenzied campaign to save the business ensued. One couture client made an offer to buy; but during the bankruptcy process, suitors like France's Bernard Krief Consulting and Italy's Borletti Group dropped out. A relative of the Sheikh of Ajman in the United Arab Emirates made a serious offer, and seemed to speak seriously of Christian Lacroix private jets and Christian Lacroix yachts and Christian Lacroix lifestyle products; for a while, it seemed all would end well, and a fantastic couture collection was shown in July despite the cash-strapped state of affairs. However, the sheikh could not provide financial assurances to the bankruptcy court, and on December 1, Falic Group's own worst-case-scenario plans were put into place. At least 100 people lost their jobs. Christian Lacroix lost the rights to his own name, and started designing uniforms for French railway workers.

Luella, the critically acclaimed and very popular British label founded in 1999 by Luella Bartley, closed less than 12 months after being named Designer of the Year at the British Fashion Awards. The distributor withdrew its backing after the Italian company that produced Luella clothing went bankrupt. Bartley said at the time that she hopes to revive the label, when the credit crunch eases.

More avant-gard designers also have not fared well this year, as perhaps might be expected. Yohji Yamamoto announced it had filed for bankruptcy protection, with debts of around $68 million, in Japan this October. (It is continuing its operations while in bankruptcy.) Belgian designer Véronique Branquinho was forced to shutter her 12-year-old line in May. New York-based Phi, founded by billionaire's wife Susan Dell and designed by Andreas Melbostad, announced it would close up shop just this week.

Photo: A model in a 2004 Véronique Branquinho show in Paris.

Jennifer Lopez has had bad luck with her clothing lines. The star founded JLO clothing in 2007, and closed it two years later. Replacement label Justweet lasted two seasons. This June, her latest effort, Sweetface, also bit the dust. Good thing she's still raking in the dough from her perfumes.

You're Fired

After rumors swirled for months, Olivier Theyskens was finally fired from Nina Ricci. His last collection included towering heel-less Gothic boots, which later turned up in an evening ensemble worn by none other than Daphne Guinness. Peter Copping was his replacement. Anna Wintour, who allegedly gasped, "How could you do this to me?" when told the news, was so upset by the whole episode that she wrote a letter from the editor about it:

Olivier Theyskens's recent departure from Nina Ricci suggests to me that the vital role of artistic talent has been obscured in the current economic climate. My staff and I were shocked to learn that Theyskens's contract would not be renewed; and I am very concerned that the business of fashion is undervaluing the most important asset our industry requires: creative visionaries. There's a reason we continue to see Theyskens's influence everywhere, from catwalks to the mall. He'll be back, but fashion must hold its nerve. This is the mission that we at Vogue happily shoulder.

Despite this ringing endorsement, by the end of this year, all we've heard of the gifted Belgian is that he's writing a book and "discussing" a "retail concept" with Tory Burch's husband.

The whole situation at the house of Ungaro this year is just Kafkaesque in its web of intricate reversals of fortune and surprise non-sequiturs. After many strenuous denials that any such move might even be considered, might even be on the table, C.E.O. Mounir Moufarrige summarily fired young Colombian designer Esteban Cortazar for failing to generate sales and buzz for the esteemed, though somewhat dusty, fashion house — and, we later learned, for refusing to work with Lindsay Lohan.

New designer Estrella Archs was brought on board — with La Lohan as her "artistic adviser" sidekick. ("It could work," said Moufarrige.) Their collection of very short, very tight, and very embellished dresses was widely panned by critics and the line was dropped by most of its U.S. distributors; Lohan later distanced herself from the decision to style the show models with heart-shaped sparkly pasties over their nipples. Then the Times of London visited her and found a disturbing scene:

The room looks like the aftermath of one of those home-alone teen parties advertised on Facebook that then gets horribly out of hand. Chaos rules. Designer clothes are strewn everywhere; most of them from a sweep of the Emanuel Ungaro boutique that Lohan made upon her arrival in Paris, walking away with an estimated £90,000 worth of free clothes. Shoes, make-up, jewellery, even a stray lampshade obscure the hotel carpet. Her passport is in here somewhere. She's been looking for it for days.

Even Ungaro himself spoke out to attack Archs and Lohan's efforts; Moufarrige denied the disastrous reception had caused any tensions, and said Lohan would stay. Then he himself abruptly quit. Stay tuned for what happens next!

That Old-Time Revival Feeling

Halston was revived. Again. This time designer Marios Schwab was chosen to helm it, and former designer Marco Zanini and stylist Rachel Zoe were ditched.

Halston book published by Phaidon


Former Valentino chief executive Matteo Marzotto and Marni chief executive Gianni Castiglioni bought the rights to the house of Vionnet in February. The clothes, when they came, were perhaps the biggest disappointment of the year. Hint to designers: There is so much you can do with Vionnet! The real Vionnet frikking invented cutting on the bias, okay? Have the temerity to at least try something daring.

Bill Blass was one of the recession's earliest casualties. The talented creative director, Peter Som, and all the other employees were fired unceremoniously just before Christmas last year; the bankrupt label was later sold, for a bargain basement price of $10 million. (In January of this year, just before his planned show at New York Fashion Week, Peter Som lost the financial backing for his own label, too.) Just this month, the new owners, Peacock Holdings, announced Jeffrey Monteiro would be taking over the designing reins. We'll see his first collection — the Times called Monteiro's clothes "nothing startling" — next winter.

Photo of a model wearing Peter Som's Fall 2008 collection for Bill Blass, the bankrupt company's most recent.


Biba. Again.

Beyond Biba documentary poster via FashionTribes


You're Hired!

Jil Sander has the unusual distinction of having been fired from her namesake label by its new owners not once, but twice. After being told her services were no longer required by Prada group owner Patrizio Bertelli for the second time, in 2004, the German designer began a long period of fashion exile. (Perhaps she had a non-compete clause to abide by.) This year, she was spotted at an industry textiles fair scouting for fabrics — and tongues started wagging. A collaboration with Uniqlo was the surprise result, and Sander's minimalist eye is now employed as the Japanese fast-fashion chain's creative director. Her second +J collection launches in the new year.

Clothing Lines Of The Stars

In 2009, everyone who was anyone got a clothing line. (Or that potentially even more remunerative consolation prize, a namesake perfume.) In the stormy waters of a recession, perhaps it's no surprise that plenty of megabrands would seek the safe harbor of a celebrity and her or his contractually obligated promotional heft.

Not one month after finally shuttering Christian Lacroix, the Falic Group announced the launch of an Eva Longoria perfume. Despite the fact that Longoria is allergic to perfume. Miley & Max Azria did a clothing line for Wal-Mart. Toby Keith sold plaid shirts; he had that much in common with the Kings of Leon. Kevin Federline announced a children's line. Mischa Barton said, of her headband line, "People want to see that you can deliver and do, like, a good job."

Richie Rich rebounded from the 2008 closure of Heatherette with an "eco-friendly" swimwear line he created with Pamela Anderson. (I actually saw the launch of this live, in New Zealand. Richie Rich rollerskated, and the runway show concluded with Anderson, clad only in a scarf, accidentally flashing the audience during her bow.) Brad and Angelina did a serpentine collection for the jewelers Asprey. It started at $525, for a baby spoon.


Whitney Port tried to get Bergdorf Goodman to buy her clothing line in the finale of The City. The Olsen twins, after a couple years hitting the top of the market with The Row and Elizabeth and James, returned to their mass tween roots with a JC Penney's collection called Olsenboye. Emma Watson said the idea of a perfume named after her made her want to vomit, but did an ethical clothing collection with People Tree. (Mischa's other line, Tree People, sadly remains hotly anticipated, at least by me.) Katie Holmes released weird jumpsuits with stylist Jeanne Yang under the label Holmes & Yang.

And I leave you with news of the strangest star collaboration of all 2009: the announcement, in June, that John Malkovich would show a line called Technobohemian at Milan's men's wear week. We may not be John Malkovich, but we can dress like him.

What will 2010 bring? This was the year of huge falls in sales and constant readjustments; 2010's shocks, coming after this raft of closures and downsizings and layoffs and consecutive quarters of declining year-on-year results will, hopefully, seem and be modest. Nobody in the fashion industry is out of the woods yet, but perhaps it's not naïve to hope that the rate of attrition should at least slow down.

The rate of stupid celebrity fashion collab debuts, however, is a trend I expect to remain strong. At least Lindsay Lohan's second collection for Ungaro should be worth watching.

• Courtney Love, who recently lost custody of Frances Bean Cobain, posted two incoherent rants on her Facebook page today, bashing Kurt Cobain's family and her 17-year-old daughter. She says Frances "was deceptive she lied and shes lying to herself."

She continues, "frankly the whole thing disgusts my daihgter is not always honest and ive alliwed her to visit with these assholes i support to the tune of houses horses and monthly annuities and cars, well the good news is now that frances is clearly deluded that she can buy her grandmaother a 'small house in la' id love to see how that works." She goes on to insult members of the Cobain family who have been named Frances' guardians saying, "well im going out with ms palmer and ms kirke and frances have fun on your covers of the tabs, thats what your wonder bread side likes, you couldve asked for emanicaption youc ouldve gone to simons rock, but you have to get involved with that terrifying not to me, to you witch who keeps britney spars in jail? thats insane. you realie this will put you in juvenoile fami;y circus three times in your little life? this is what along with his mother killed your father..." [Perez Hilton]

• Now that a judge has shut down Jon Gosselin's TV career, he's running out of money and the bills are stacking up. "Jon's in pretty serious financial trouble because his plan for making money was shut down in court," said a source. "He has warned his lawyers that he can't pay them and if he doesn't succeed against TLC, he will have no funds. He's even gone so far as to say that if they want to be paid, they will have to sue him." The insider adds that it's time for Jon to get a real job, but he's making no effort to do so. [Fox News]
• It's too bad that Lindsay Lohan wasn't in court today — a judge gave her high marks for complying with the terms of her DUI probation. [TMZ]
• According to a police report, Erin Muller says she's afraid her ex Michael Lohan "will do bad things to me and my family" because he called her on Sunday morning and "started harassing me, questioning me who I have 'been with, who's car was currently in my drive way,' things like that." He called her twice and she recorded both conversations. An embarrassing leak to the press would only be fair. [TMZ]
• A-Rod's friend says he broke up with Kate Hudson because of the way she behaved at Yankees games. "[Hudson] wanted more camera time each and every game," said the source. "She would always want to be styled before games and she'd insist on front-row seats... It was a turnoff to have a girlfriend who always wanted to be on camera. Alex wanted someone who was more interested in building a long-term relationship than just building their profile." [Us]
• Michael David Barrett plead guilty to stalking Erin Andrews today. Before he entered his plea Andrews told the court, "I have nightmares about the sexual predator. I hope he never sees the light of day so no one else has to deal with this." [TMZ]
• It was a busy day at Tiger Woods' house. Art was taken from the home in a moving van and workers showed up, possibly to repair damage in the vestibule that resulted from Tiger's Thanksgiving fight with his wife. [TMZ]
• Elin Nordegren took her two children with her to a lunch meeting at a restaurant. She told the paparazzi (who were screaming at her, no doubt) that her kids are "doing just fine." An eyewitness says, "She looks bone-thin... And her conversation with the other adults was very intense, especially in comparison to smiling little Sam and Charlie." [Ok]
• Nike chairman and co-founder Phil Knight says of Tiger Woods, "When his career is over, you'll look back on these indiscretions as a minor blip, but the media is making a big deal out of it right now." [Us]
• Sources say Tiger Woods' latest mistress Theresa Rogers "was crazy about Tiger but she didn't want to feel like a bought woman, a paid escort. She just wanted to be the woman who schooled Tiger in the bedroom... She bragged, 'I taught him everything he needed to know to be a great lover!'" [Radar Online]
• Tiger Woods offered to buy his "porn star mistress" Joslyn James a house, according to her sister. "She told me once that Tiger Woods was going to buy her a house in Las Vegas and that she had seen him many times," said Samantha Siwik. "I believe that my sister took advantage of him because I know that she is that kind of person – she only thinks about herself. It would not have bothered her that he was married she would wanted to get all that she could from him." [Radar Online]
• Amy Winehouse's father Mitch Winehouse insists she has not reunited with Blake Fielder-Civil, even though she spent two days at his apartment last week. "Don't believe all that you read! I am not going to comment on Amy's trip to see Blake, except to say this guy who purports to love Amy, the next day, sold an exclusive to The Sun," said Mitch. "He has a funny way of showing his love. Nice earner though - 5k at least. It sits beside other betrayals; selling Amy's letters to the papers, videoing her when he said camera was off etc. So why [do the newspapers] give this liar, violent criminal and betrayer the time of day?" [Daily Express]
• Sacha Baron Cohen and Isla Fisher have reportedly decided to get married in May or June. "Isla and Sacha want a small wedding that will include only family and their closet friends - possibly fewer than 50 people," says a source. [Daily Express]
• Richard Perry says the rumors that he and Jane Fonda are engaged aren't true. "She thinks it's a bit too soon [to marry], and no doubt, she's right, although I said from the beginning we should make our relationship a priority," he said, adding, "Sometimes the thought pops into my head that Jane will organise a wedding as a wonderful surprise for me." [Daily Express]
• At the Nobel Peace Prize after party Toby Keith slanted his eyes while Will Smith rapped the word "yellow" in "Rapper's Delight." His rep says: "No one at the concert thought Toby was out of line. Everyone was impressed with his rapping skills and that's it ... all of the artists liked each other, hung out, and it was a very friendly, genuine, and supportive atmosphere." [TMZ]
• Barry Williams, who played Greg Brady on The Brady Bunch, obtained a restraining order against his ex-girlfriend Elizabeth Kennedy because he claims she once pulled a knife on him and, "I know that she will definitely try to harm me once she is aware that our relationship is now over." [TMZ]
• Randy and Evi Quaid failed to show up for yet another court date today so a judge issued $40,000 arrest warrants for both of them. [Radar Online]
• Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi of Jersey Shore says getting punched in the face wasn't all bad. "A positive came out of it," said Snooki. "It definitely brought [the cast] closer together. It definitely brought us together as a family. We have each other's backs and it was a positive." [People]
• Meredith Baxter, who recently came out, will be writing a memoir about "her life as an actress, mother of five children, and grandmother, and will candidly discuss her fight with breast cancer, her 19 years of sobriety, entrepreneurship, and her decision to come out." [N.Y.T.]
• The House unanimously passed a resolution recognizing the 50th anniversary of Miles Davis recording "Kind of Blue." [AP]
• Abba, Genesis, Jimmy Cliff, The Hollies, and The Stooges will be inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame next year. Kiss was nominated for the first time but wasn't selected this year. [N.Y.T.]
• American Idol winner Kris Allen says of Adam Lambert's recent racy performance, "Yeah, that's who he is... Obviously, he couldn't do that stuff on Idol. And so you're getting to see the real Adam now." [People]
• Brian Setzer was hospitalized last night after he collapsed during a concert in New Mexico. His rep says he was suffering from "a combination of dehydration, high altitude, and vertigo," but he's completely recovered and will perform tonight. [TMZ]
• Robin Thicke, whose latest album is titled Sex Therapy, says his wife Paula Patton is "my sex therapist." [Us]
• After hearing that he's up for Best Dramatic Actor at the Golden Globes this year Colin Firth said, "The Hollywood Foreign Press have just given me time out from my 20 year midlife crisis - my heartfelt thanks to them." [The Mirror]
• Sandra Bullock says of receiving two Golden Globe nominations, "I am beyond stunned. Just to be included in the company of these amazing women I have so admired through the years has left me slack-jawed with awe." [People]
• "Not that I have a husband to have one with yet, but someday I'd like a family – not a big one, but not a small one either," says Carrie Underwood. "Two kids is good; three is fine. Four? Somebody's getting something done, because we ain't having five!" [People]
• Q: In one sentence, what do you actually do all day in your job? Kristen Johnston: "Try to stay sane." [New York]
• Q: What do you do when you come to New York? Wilford Brimley: "Well, we eat good food in good restaurants. You've got the best food in the world here. And I visit friends that mean a whole lot to me. You know, we live on a ranch in a small Wyoming town. We don't live on Mars." [New York]
• Alanis Morissette used to be depressed, but she told Runner's World, "running has made being depressed impossible. If I'm going through something emotional and just go outside for a run, you can rest assured I'll come back with clarity." Also helpful: "Red wine, and it's fun to have medical marijuana once in a while." [People]
• Teresa Giudice of RHONJ Tweeted about RHONY star Bethenny Frankel's nude PETA ad, "To quote Bethenny: 'I just threw up a little in my mouth." She continued, "Help me understand this. Bethenny is happy with her naked pic because she was 'already pregnant' at the time. She says she's now three months along, but she did the shot in August. Even if she's four months pregnant now, she would've been, like, one hour pregnant in the pic... Someone tell Bethenny that sperm does not make you look fat, and I'm not buying the airbrushing thing in any case." [Us]

• They said it would never happen, but a judge ordered that Google reveal Liskula Cohen's anonymous online tormentor. The model sued Google to find out who was behind a hate-blog about her, in order to file a defamation suit. [NYPost]

• Marc Jacobs does not "enjoy", "look forward to," or anticipate seeing any shows besides his own at New York Fashion Week. "Enjoy?" said the designer, at a party in the Hamptons, "Enjoy is a weird word. It's work — work is more what it's about." So it's not fun? "No." In addition to his two collections to show, Jacobs has a wedding pull together just now — his nuptuals with partner Lorenzo Martone will take place privately in Provincetown, Massachussetts, "soon." [The Cut]
• Hopefully Jacobs was put in slightly better humor by a visit from Miss Piggy. She needed a dress for a red carpet affair in Chicago, and the designer was happy to oblige, so the porcine starlet popped in for a fitting. [WWD]
• Keira Knightley and a strategically arranged suspender star in the newest ad for Chanel's Coco Mademoiselle perfume. [Egotastic]
• Sass & Bide, the Australian denim label which generally shows internationally in New York, has announced it is joining the thundering horde heading to London Fashion Week this season. A raft of British designers have made special arrangements to return to London to show in this, London Fashion Week's 25th anniversary year, and even Anna Wintour — who normally drops the city from her fashion calendar — will be showing up. [Telegraph]
• The cast of the next season of Dancing With The Stars has been announced, and Vera Wang's name is not there. Kelly Osbourne, Melissa Joan Hart, and an Ultimate Fighting Champion might not make the best company, anyway, and Wang has a company to run, so we're not that surprised. [Us]
• Elettra Weidemann, Isabella Rossellini's daughter, scored another fall campaign, for G Star. Anton Corbijn, who directed the Joy Division movie Control, and has photographed U2 for years, was the photographer. [Fashionista]
• Eugenia Kim's diffusion line for Urban Outfitters, branded Eek!, includes a nice looking cloche, and some potentially interesting headbands and fascinators. For $28-$48, as opposed to Kim's main line's $200-$300 pricepoint, this line looks like a winner. [FabSugar]
• Speaking of Urban Outfitters, is there any other chain you would expect to take up the noble cause of saving Polaroid from obsolescence? [Elle UK]
• Hermès is reissuing one of its classic scarf designs to benefit the International Federation of Human Rights. The blue-green scarf will be sold on fidh.org for 215 Euros, starting early next month. [WWD]
• Fashion blind item! "WHICH rising American model has stopped getting snapped backstage by photographers? She's dated so many of them (and their important friends) that now they refuse to give her any exposure!" [Fashionista]
• Wal-Mart is expanding its reach into the tween market. In addition to having Taylor Swift design dresses for L.E.I., and selling Miley Cyrus's line with Max Azria, the world's largest retailer has inked a deal with Nickelodeon to partner with the young stars of a show called True Jackson. [WWD]
• Presumably in order to give Toby Keith a run for his money, Kenny Chesney is launching a fashion line. [People]
• Zara is expanding its outlet chain, Leftie's, into France, after successfully opening the super-budget stores in Portugal and Mexico. This is clearly something we need stateside, stat. [WWD]
• Saks' net loss in the second quarter widened to $54.5 million, an increase from the $32.7 million loss the company experienced during the same period last year. However, Saks actually beat analysts' expectations. [WWD]

• While performing stand-up in New York on August 5, Rosie O'Donnell started talking about her stint on The View, which she referred to as The Screw You, and called Elisabeth Hasselbeck "Elisabeth Half-a-brain." But Rosie wasn't done!

• An audience member says, "Rosie said when she first met Elisabeth, she thought she would love her, because they're both Christians... Then she stopped and said, 'But then she turned on me.' Then Rosie called her a 'twat.' O'Donnell then moved on to a different subject, saying she really didn't want to start a new feud, or restart an old one." Too late Rosie! [Fox News]
• Jon and Kate Gosselin's divorce will be finalized by the end of the month. Also Hailey Glassman has agreed to do an interview with E!'s Giuliana Rancic on August 17 in a one-hour special at 7pm ET. She's going to stay away from the kids until the divorce is official, but then all bets are off. [Radar Online, Ok]
• This week's episode of Jon and Kate Plus 8 had only 3.5 million viewers, down 4 million from the week before. [Us]
• Let's hope no one gets in Taylor Lautner's way! "I love that kid," says Kristen Stewart. "I would do anything for him. I would kill for him, literally." [People]
• Though it was reported that Jennie Garth, who is married to Twilight's Peter Facinelli said Robert Pattinson was either dating Kristen Stewart or Nikki Reed, rep says she actually said, "I can't say [who Rob's dating]. That will be breaking my promise to my husband. But I do know." [Radar Online]
• This morning on Today, Brad Pitt says he's seen the "Brad Pitt for mayor" shirts many New Orleans resident have been wearing, but he's not considering a run because, "I don't have a chance." [AP]
• Three sources say Dr. Conrad Murray left Michael Jackson alone after giving him propofol to make phone calls on the morning he died. He'd left him alone after giving him the drug before, but not monitoring MJ may legally meet the level of negligence required for an involuntary manslaughter charge. [L.A. Times]
• Michael Jackson and a man named Henry Vaccaro had been fighting over some of MJ's memorabilia, including 26 unreleased songs for years. When two of Jackson's lawyers went to retrieve eight of the items last month Vaccaro said they were missing, but the items were later auctioned off. Police are investigating. [TMZ]
• Motown founder Berry Gordon will write the introduction to the rerelease of Michael Jackson's memoir Moonwalk. [AP]
• Though Amy Winehouse was previously banned from entering the U.S. she still wants to do a tour and her spokesperson said that now, "There is nothing to stop her getting a visa to travel to America." [Contact Music]
• Patrick Swayze was recently hospitalized for a week, possibly because of intestinal bleeding, but he's home now. [Radar Online]
• Madonna is renovating her recently purchased New York townhouse and now huge dumpsters are blocking the entire road. [The Sun]
• If Philadelphia school officials approve, Tony Danza may co-teach 10th grade English at Northeast High School this fall for a reality TV show called Teach on A&E. [AP]
• Billy Mays' health insurance commercial for the iCAN benefit group has been pulled from the air. [TMZ]
• Kourtney Kardashian has revealed that boyfriend Scott Disick is the father of her child. As for how she could have gotten pregnant she said, "There's so many times I'll forget to take my pill. I've done that several times and never really thought about it…I know, it's stupid." When she told Disick, "He was like way more like excited than I was. Like he definitely wasn't as nervous and scared." But she's not sure if they'll get married. She says, "We've talked about it, but I feel like there's so much going on that I like can't even go there." [E!]
• Kourtney's mom Kris Jenner says, "I am beyond thrilled and excited and cannot wait to meet my new grandchild! We are truly blessed." [People]
• Sky Blu of the hip-hop group LMFAO has a crush on Khloe Kardashian. [E!]
• Though she initially didn't show much interest in Beatles Rock Band, which will be released in September, Yoko Oko visited Harmonix studios in Boston a few months ago. "She gave the designers hell," said a VP at the company. "We were like, ‘Oh, gee. Thanks'. It would have been nice to know that six months ago, but yes, ‘Thank you very much'." [Mirror]
• Karl Rove and Rush Limbaugh are going to guest star in an upcoming episode of Family Guy in which Brian becomes a Republican because he's upset he has nothing to complain about anymore with Barack Obama in the White House. [Politico]
• Toby Keith's new song and music video American Ride may become the theme for town hallers. It makes fun of global warming, terrorists, and illegal immigrants, and the video shows "President Bush in front of the White House giving Christian-right leader Pat Robertson a piggyback ride. Another shows bankers hoisting President Obama in a walk through a destroyed Wall Street district as dollars fall from the sky." Check it out here: [U.S. News & World Report]
• The Miss Universe Organization has releasing topless photos of outgoing Miss Universe, Dayana Mendoza of Venezuela, to Maxim for the September issue. While previously similar organizations have always condemned contestants for releasing such pictures (Mendoza's arm covers her breasts), a pageant official said, "She just loved the way they turned out and she really wanted to be able to share them. If she had taken these photos and sent them to a magazine, that would be a different issue. But she handled this so appropriately. She came to us and said, ‘I understand I'm Miss Universe and I have this title, but as Dayana Mendoza, I'd like to share these photos.'" [MSNBC]
• Jerry O'Connell has enrolled at Los Angeles' Southwestern Law School. When his wife Rebecca Romijn was asked why he enrolled there she said he was, "very impressed with the faculty and the vibe here. This is brand new to him as well. He's very much looking forward to his education." [Us]
• In the video at the link Jessica Capshaw of Grey's Anatomy explains that the next season will be "heavy." [E!]
• Reese Witherspoon, who is filming the baseball movie How Do You Know has just recovered from getting a black eye a few weeks ago, and now she has another one. [Daily Express]
• Abbie Cornish, who was accuse of breaking up Reese Witherspoon and Ryan Philippe's relationship says, "It was a really difficult time for me... It was just this world of tabloid magazines that I'd never been exposed to. In a normal successful career, someone usually learns these things bit by bit. For me, it was like night and day. I woke up one day and there was this whole new thing I had to process and deal with." [W]
• Mike Tyson has given his first interview since the accidental death of his 4-year-old daughter Exodus. "I am working with dealing with it," he says. "I have spoken to a lot of people. I have become a member of an exclusive club no one wants to join. I have been told the pain never stops but you get over it. I am going through a process, trying to heal. I am in denial, because I don't know how to handle it. I don't know what to do or say. I appreciate everybody who supported me." [Entertainment Tonight]
• Victoria Beckman's rep says, "there are no talks of her being a permanent judge [on American Idol]. They felt she was natural in Denver. [But] she has Fashion Week coming up, and she is focusing on that." [L.A. Times]
• Lily Allen has but a Breitling watch she bough for herself that's too big up for sale on Twitter for £3,200. [Daily Mail]
• Here's a picture of Katie Price's new boyfriend, Alex Reid, hanging out with Katie and Peter Andre's son. Both are topless for some reason. [Daily Mail]
• "I love England. It would be a wonderful life experience to have an excuse to work here for six or nine months..." says Quentin Tarantino. "I am a huge fan of Simon Pegg, so I would definitely love to work with him. I also think Kate Winslet is one of the best actresses that ever lived, so I would be honoured to work with her. I am also a huge admirer of Anthony Hopkins. I would also love to work with Michael Caine. I can see them appearing in my movies, it just has to be right." [Daily Express]
• Q: How does it feel to be the face of Twitter. Ashton Kutcher: "It feels like I should own some of it but unfortunately I don't. However one person does not make a community." [Time]
• Q: Does it bother you to be called Mr. Demi Moore? Ashton Kutcher: No. Why would it? People have called me much worse. [Time]
• Rachel McAdams says of playing a mother for the first time, "I was excited and nervous about it because I haven't done it before. It was a welcome challenge. The little girls [Hailey McCann and Tatum McCann] in this film were so fantastic. They are real sisters and they made my job really easy. So I didn't have to work too hard at that." [People]
• "I think Pete's really honest, and there's something to be said for that, on this show. He's honest even when it works against him. He can't help himself. He has to say the blatant thing. He's like that guy who meets someone and says, "Oh wow, you have a mole on your nose!" I like people like that. They're not ashamed to go up to a guy and be like, 'Hey, how'd you lose your arms?' Like, 'Come on, everyone else is wondering, I had to ask!' But then, the guy without the arms is probably so sick of answering that question! ... He's no Don Draper. Like you said, he's the biggest rube in the room. And he's the biggest buffoon in the room." — Vincent Kartheiser of Mad Men [Salon]

• In 2007 Sean Penn and wife Robin Wright said they were divorcing, but then reconciled. On Friday Penn filed for "legal separation with minor children," three days before their thirteenth wedding anniversary. [Extra]

• People has released its 100 Most Beautiful People issue and Christina Applegate took the cover, which Perez Hilton thinks Robert Pattinson deserved. Isn't beating cancer just a bit more impressive than starring in a vampire movie? [Perez Hilton]
• In the cover story, Christina Applegate says that she's trying to embrace her body after having a double mastectomy. "You have to get through the physical transformations then buck up, go to work and try to be the normal, happy Christina for everyone around you," she says, adding that her boyfriend helped her through it. "I'm very grateful to Martyn [Lenoble] for coming along at a time that he did because he's been my rock through all of this," Applegate says. "He gave me something to really want to live for and something to smile about." [People]
• Also among People's Most Beautiful People: Michelle Obama, Dev Patel, and Nick and Joe Jonas. [People, Reuters]
• Director of Robert Pattinson's new film How to Be says, "He was thinking about giving up acting and maybe doing music solely when this role [in How To Be] came along ... He wanted to play the roles he wasn't getting." [People]
• A judge ruled the the $1.4 million jewels Rihanna was wearing the night of the beating can be released from evidence and returned to their owner. [TMZ]
• Tyra Banks testified today against her accused stalker, Brady Green, saying: "I fear my safety. I feel extremely vulnerable. I fear the safety of my staff. My family." She said her staff doesn't tell her about fans, but "They said this person threatened one of my staffers. At that moment that was it. The first thing is there's this person who's more than a fan." [People]
• Tyra Banks says that Brady Green is "more aggressive" than a regular fan and she has been forced to hire security. Green sent Tyra love letters and flowers and was arrested when he snuck into her studio. If convicted he faces 90 days in jail. [TMZ]
• Jon Gosselin of Jon and Kate Plus Eight responded to the photos of him leaving a nightclub with a woman who was not Kate, saying, "Like most people, I have male and female friends and I'm not going to end my friendships just because I'm on TV. However, being out...late at night showed poor judgment on my part. What makes me sick is that my careless behavior has put my family in this uncomfortable position. My family is the most important thing in my life and it kills me that these allegations have hurt them." [Entertainment Weekly]
• Liev Schreiber missed the L.A. premiere of X-Men Origins: Wolverine because his 21-month-old son, Sasha was sick. His rep said, "Sasha got home today and is feeling much better after being hospitalized on Tuesday night with respiratory problems." [People, TMZ]
• When Hugh Jackman heard that 800 people lined up a day early for the X-Men Origins: Wolverine premiere in Tempe, Arizona, he personally called a local cafe and treated everyone to a breakfast of coffee and pastries. [The Daily Express]
• TMZ has a copy of the police report from Casey Aldridge's truck crash. The report says "for some unknown reason" Aldridge's truck went off the road and ran into a ditch. Then he "overcorrected and lost control" of the truck. It went back on to the road and then rolled over. A passenger says Aldridge wasn't drinking. [TMZ]
• Al Roker will appear on The Weather Channel in a new show called Wake Up With Al. THe show will air from 6 am to 7 am so Al can continue working on The Today Show. [AP]
• Kate Walsh's soon-to-be ex, Alex Young, demanded to know how much money he deserved from his half of the home they purchased together. They bought it for $4.95 million and now it is worth $3.6 million, so it doesn't look like he'll be getting that much, especially since Walsh paid most of the down payment and he left her with the mortgage. [TMZ]
• Shauna Sand has obtained a restraining order against estranged husband Romain Chavent. She claims, he held her down, bit her lips, and tried to suffocate her. [TMZ]
• 71-year-old Jane Fonda slipped into her 1980s workout leotard for a skit at a New York charity event. [The Daily Mail]
• Susan Boyle says reports that she is leaving Britain's Got Talent are totally untrue. "There is no way I am quitting the show - the only way I'd leave the show is if Simon Cowell kicked me out!" she said. [The Independent]
• In 2004 Sharon Stone became a mail-order minister so she could marry restaurateur Michael Bourseau and stylist Brenda Swanson, but now the couple has filed for divorce. [TMZ]
• Ashanti will star as Dorothy in The Wiz this summer at the New York City Center. [NY Times]
• Toby Keith, who has had several celebrity feuds over the years, said, "if you're gonna tell a lie about me, and then back it up like it's the truth to try to make your star brighter ... yeah, I've got a problem with that ... If you can't do as well as I'm doing, then the only thing you can do is take shots at me, but that's expected." [AP]
• Christian Bale says of his leaked tirade at a technician on set, "I did what I did, I'm not hiding from that - I went overboard." He continued, "But there is an essential trust and it's not a tacit one, it's a verbal one, a spoken one, which is every sound guy says, 'We are not only not recording, we are not listening.' So, well, there goes that." [The Star]
• The Good Morning America anchors pranked Matthew McConaughey this morning by letting him show up to an empty studio in New York while they were all in D.C. celebrating Obama's first 100 days. There's video of McConaughey wandering around the set, as the anchors cackle here: [VideoGum]
• Tony Bennett donated a watercolor painted of friend Duke Ellington to the Smithsonian museum today in honor of the 110th anniversary of Ellington's birth. [AP]
• Usher says his 17-month-old son, Usher Raymond V, has "got my name and it seems to me he has my personality," but Usher doesn't want him to be a performer necessarily. "I hope whatever he chooses to do in his life, he goes after it with passion and dedication," he says. [People]
• At least one Jonas brother doesn't plan to be making music with his brothers forever. Joe Jonas says, "I guess personally I would love to do more acting, maybe movies – that would be really cool." Either that or he may, "write a book one day, because I love to read. The Alchemist is my favorite book of all time." [People]
• Joe Jonas also says of "Forever and Always" the song Taylor Swift wrote about their breakup, "It's flattering ... It's always nice to hear their side of the story."[ONTD]
• Grace Jones is known for being late, but she showed up last night to a performance attended by many celebrities less than 30 minutes before the end of the party. When she finally did arrive, she descended to the dance floor in a clear glass elevator, wearing a cape and a mask in the shape of a butterfly. [WWD]
• Sex and the City costume designer Patricia Field says of Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick having twins, "It's going to be interesting, ... I think that she could have fierce daughters. Fierce daughters!" [People]

• Being on vacation with Amy Winehouse must be relentlessly entertaining:

She was apparently told she couldn't sunbathe au naturale, so she whipped off her bikini top and streaked through the resort in St. Lucia, waving her arms in the air. She told you she was trouble! [Daily Mail]

• The family of Mercy James, the Malawian child Madonna would like to adopt, are on Madonna's side. Mercy's uncle says the guy who claims to be Mercy's biological dad "didn't care about his girlfriend, Mercy's mother, when she needed him most. He didn't even come to see his baby." [The Sun]
• Madonna was overheard telling people: I can't believe I'm leaving my beautiful baby behind. It's not right. I love that baby girl. She's my little girl - she needs to be with me." A judge disagrees, your Madgesty! [MSNBC]
• Chris Brown was in court yesterday, and he pleaded not guilty to two felony counts. His next court date is a preliminary hearing on April 29. [Rolling Stone]
• Some are "surprised" that Chris Brown pleaded not guilty? Really? [MSNBC Scoop]
• Rihanna was not in court, but her lawyer was, and he said her feelings about the case are that she would be happy if "it were over quickly." [TMZ]
• The latest on Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson, according to LL: "We are taking a brief break so I can focus on myself." But, uh, she banned you from her party and changed the locks, right? [E!]
• Sam Ronson's family is hoping that Sam will not get back together with Lindsay. Ouch! [People]
• Courtney Love is about to sue a whole mess of people: She finally realized that whomever had been handling Kurt Cobain's estate lost millions of dollars. It's not her fault she didn't look into this sooner, she was high, okay? [Page Six]
• Cops in Costa Rica are investigating the security team hired by Tom Brady and Gisele Bundchen since they, you know, open fired on photographers, which doesn't seem very legal. [NY Post]
• Gisele wore Galliano, by the by. [People]
• Howard K. Stern will not cut a deal with the D.A. in the Anna Nicole Smith drug case and is expected to plead not guilty. He'll be in court today. [TMZ]
• Do what you must to prepare yourself: Britney Spears might take her Circus tour to Australia. [E!]
• Of the items being moved out of Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin's London home, the mattress is not surprising; the dinosaur, the large horse and surfboard are. Gwynnie's moving to NYC; Chris is going on tour. [Daily Mail]
• Speaking of Chris Martin, Coldplay is denying that it copied Joe Satriani's music for "Viva La Vida." [Breitbart]
• Oh dear: Scarlett Johansson has reportedly been working out with Gwyneth's trainer, Tracy Anderson. She's already lost 14 pounds and now she's off carbs. Is she prepping for Iron Man 2 or just joining the brigade of stick thin stars? [The Sun]
• Did a reporter set up a fake charity and trick Heather Mills into dishing dirt on Paul McCartney? [ABC News]
• Zac Efron's mom stuffed hi stocking with condoms last Christmas and his dad gave him some speech about protection at some point so maybe the point is you won't see Zac as a young baby daddy any day soon. [E!]
• The woman who was saved from committing suicide by Demi Moore and "the Twitter community" says "I'm eternally grateful to her for helping me." [RadarOnline]
• Why aren't people donating to Prince Harry's African charity? Donations have dropped a whopping 84%. [Telegraph]
• Jennifer Garner will star in Butter, a flick that's a political satire set in the small-town world of competitive butter-sculpting. Yeah. Butter. [The Hollywood Reporter]
• Ru-roh: Pamela Anderson's boyfriend was in a kite-surfing accident in Hawaii. Luckily, he escaped serious injury and didn't need C.J. to run into the water with a red floaty thing. [Daily Express]
• Kylie Minogue took her new man to meet her parents and they found him to be "charming and witty." Good sign. [Daily Express]
• Buddhist and friend of the Dalai Lama Richard Gere attended a "Mind and Life" conference in Dharamsala, India on Monday. [Hindustan Times]
• Dennis Rodman was thrown out of a West Hollywood hotel after "slapping and groping" female guests. He needs to learn how to ask nicely when he wants to borrow a dress. [TMZ]
• The Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation received a gift from the estate of the late Luther Vandross; the amount of the gift was not disclosed. [UPI]
• Blind item! "Which Grammy-winning rapper can't get enough weed? She orders from a NYC delivery service non-stop, then tries to sweet-talk the courier into giving her free bags of ganja." [Gatecrasher]
• "He's certainly not the buffoon he looks like. This is the most amazing thing I found out about him. I was once staying at a hotel, and I was in the room directly under his. He is an amazing fuck — and you can quote me on this. The screams coming from the woman were some of the purest sounds of pleasure I'd ever heard." — Rupert Everett on Vanity Fair editor Graydon Carter. [Page Six via The Daily Beast]
• "Casey grew up in one of the richest families in New York, and she grew up without any responsibilities or any boundaries. And so, for her, it was very important to do something where there were laws and where your morals counted. I was very much into the idea of doing something I hadn't done before. This is a show about cops. Our show is very grounded in the sense of the crappy things that happen to you are funny. That's how you deal with them and get through life." — Amber Tamblyn, on her character in new show The Unusuals. [USA Today]
• "I don't know Ethan Hawke. Ethan Hawke wanted to do some kind of superficial Rolling Stone article. And he did everything he could to make his story the greatest story ever in Rolling Stone. And it was a fictitious (expletive) lie. O.K? He didn't even call me by my name. ... He called Norah Jones, Ray Charles, everybody else by name. Willie (Nelson), Kris (Kristofferson). Why didn't he call my name? Why didn't he say Toby Keith walked through and said this (expletive)? Right? You know why. You know why. You know as good as anybody why. He didn't want to (expletive) deal with the aftermath." — Toby Keith. [Yahoo News via AP]
• "The pilot script showed up, and I stalked [producer Alan Ball] until he said yes. The morning I showed up for work after going blonde, everyone was very relieved." — Anna Paquin on playing Sookie Stackhouse in True Blood. [Vanity Fair]
• "We were on the set, and the two firefighters that work here, I overheard them talking about, 'Yeah, you know, if I'd known I could measure from the pubic bone… And they were talking about a cock-measuring contest.' And I go, 'That's going in the show.'" — Denis Leary on Rescue Me. [The Daily Beast]
• "I'm crying for two and a half hours straight. And then you leave the stage door and people are like, 'Can we take your picture?' And I'm thinking, 'I've never looked worse.' I need a lot of eye cream." — Lauren Ambrose, on her role in the play Exit The King. [WWD]
• "Combs have been on the scene ever since humans had hair on his head. which is quite sometime? The date perhaps goes beyond the time of the old stone age. Man being man and not a lion would
  not be content to let his mane run wild and free. So he had to find some ways to tame it. First on the list of combing operations must have been the use of fingers. So in a way the fingers are the first combs of history. Today, combs are universal and no corner of the globe is without it." — Your friend Kanye West. [Jossip]

• Yes, it's fashion week, yes, there are better things to talk about, and yes, we'll get to them after the jump, but first: Toby Keith's clothing line debuted. It's worse than we thought. [TMZ]

• London's fashion week, small but mighty as always, starts today and only runs for four days. It's a strange paradox of British fashion that, while some of the top designers — McQueen, Galliano — are from the UK, and London's Central St. Martins is acknowledged as one of the best fashion schools in the world, London fashion week has never quite managed the automatic prestige of New York's, Milan's, or Paris's (which is, not incidentally, where Galliano and McQueen both show). [Reuters]
• André Leon Talley went nuts for Vera Wang's show in her new downtown store. [The Cut]
• Who invited Julia Allison to Philip Lim? He doesn't make pink clothes. [Observer]
• WWD gets its own loving spoof! Worldwide Womenswear Digest, or WWWD has stories like "THE PARENT TRAP: Bee Shaffer shocked to learn most parents don't have yearly hug limits" and "Diane von Furstenberg Debuts Controversial Spinach Wrap Dress." Awesome. [The Cut]
• Leanne Marshall, who won this show called Project Runway this one time, completed a cross-country move and finished her entire fall collection in a few weeks. She says the only thing that's hard about designing from her Brooklyn apartment is keeping her cat out of her sewing. [People]
• Bravo's replacement for their lost treasure, to be called The Fashion Show, will be hosted by Isaac Mizrahi, Fern Mallis...and Kelly Rowland. [Variety]
• In the front row at Calvin yesterday afternoon, Eva Mendes explains the concept of a fashion show to newbie Kate Beckinsale: "It's a little like going to a museum and seeing a beautiful exhibit, except it's emotion." Did she mean, "in motion"? [WWD]
• SIR — Thank you for your measured post considering the economic value of the fashion industry. I'll resist the temptation to call any of the economists who would argue that "creative innovation that matters is somebody in a lab at MIT coming up with a more efficient battery or solar cell. It is somebody at Stanford coming up with a way to make computers smarter or cancer more preventable. I just can't get excited about some frou-frou fashion designers and the magazines that feature their creations" pointy-headed misogynist assholes (who probably dress poorly and were made fun of for it in high school). [The Economist]
• There is justice! Crocs lost $33 million last quarter. [WWD]
• The three shareholders in De Beers — a mining company, the government of Botswana, and the family of company chairman Nicky Oppenheimer — have together loaned the diamond company $500 million as sales have softened because of the economy. The loan is interest-free for two years. De Beers had record sales in the first three quarters of 2008, but the last quarter was flat, and analysts expect 2009 to be even worse. [Reuters]
• Wholesale prices of US-made apparel rose in the month of January, despite concerns about deflation. [WWD]
• Brazilian designer Alexandre Herchcovitz is able to afford to show in New York partly because of his home country's lavish support of the arts. This season's show cost $170,000, around $70,000 of which came from the Brazilian government. I'm always mystified by the huge numbers some designers give as their budget costs for models — Herchcovitz claims he spent $90,000 on models a year ago — and I have to wonder, are they counting the "cost" of the trade they offer as payment to the girls who work the show? Because as far as I can recall, Herchcovitz is one of the many to "pay" in clothes. Not that giving away clothes isn't a cost to a designer, but I don't think it's unreasonable to recognize that providing some of your product for free is a different class of cost than actual out-of-pocket expenditures. [NY Times]
• Versace is dipping a nervous toe into the turbid waters of internet retail. [WWD]
• And Celine Dion wants you to smell Chic like her this April. [WWD]
• After Victoria Beckham agreed to sell her upscale line of dresses exclusively through Bergdorf's, Saks, which had been among the first to support her dVb by Victoria Beckham denim line, decided to drop the pants. Kitson and Henri Bendel stopped restocking dVb last year because of poor sales. [NY Post]

• Rachel Zoe and Nicole Ritchie hugged while cameras for Zoe's reality show rolled. Presumably they made up based on their shared love of airtime and handbags the size and price of compact cars. [WWD]

• Stella McCartney designed some t-shirts for a British charity and got besties Gwyneth Paltrow, Claudia Schiffer, and Keira Knightley to wear them for the ad campaign. [Telegraph]
• Aw, Twiggy goes shopping with her daughter, Carly. "If I come out of a changing room and she says, ‘Muummm!’ to what I’m wearing then I won’t buy it." How cute. [Daily Express]
• When in Rome, you should absolutely go check out an exhibit featuring newly unearthed Richard Avedon fashion photographs. [WSJ]
• Is LVMH going to acquire Coach? Some speculators think so. [WWD]
• So, what is this 'vintage' thing? Is it like shopping at a department store? Anna Sui guides Good Morning America around the Manhattan Vintage Clothing Show. "If you find yourself drawn to Victorian clothes, there may be a touch of the Goth in you," warns the host, helpfully. Then she learns what Bakelite is and tries on a $4,000 sable fur. Sui looks on approvingly. [HuffPo]
• UK megaretailer ASDA is going to offer women's jeans in half sizes. Since most women say they are between sizes. Brilliant! [Telegraph]
• Threeasfour give the dreamiest interview answers. Who are your best friends? Ange: "My humor and melancholia." Adi: "Which one? They are all individual. One-of-a-kind." Gabi: "I can trust she is telling me the truth." Ange also makes seaweed omelets for her pit bull, Luna. [The Fashion Informer]
• Rizzoli's coming out with a Kanye West book. You can see Kanye tour the world, perform, go to fashion parties, and even shop in Asian malls. It will be published in October with a flash drive of unreleased music, and costs $50. [The Cut]
• Models.com has started posting agency show packages for the Fall Winter 09 shows in New York. See if you can spot my game face among the hopefuls and the old hands. (Warning: Needle, meet haystack.) [Models.com]
• Marc Jacobs has slashed the number of invitees to his fashion show at the Armory. In fact, the show is only going forward at their usual venue because they don't want to pay the cancellation fee. And, of course, there will be no after-party, either. Instead of seating 1,100 people and letting another 900 stand, this season only 500-700 people will be seated, and the 200 standing room tickets will go mainly to employees. Hopefully they will also do the simplest guest-list cost-trim of all: not coughing up thousands in appearance fees to the usual round of celebs. [WWD]
• Ugly Betty's production moved to New York for tax breaks, and has regained the styling talent of Patricia Field. At a panel discussion of the show's aesthetic, Field accepted an audience member's donation of a patterned, sparkly top that looked like classic Betty wear, and which she said might well turn up on the show. [NY Times]
• Remember when Chloë Sevigny called the guy she buys socks from "like, the grumpiest man on earth" in the New York Times? He doesn't deny it — which is probably wise, considering he admits stealing his employees' lunches, putting trash in unpleasant customers' bags, and barking at people who take their time browsing — but he does say, "Dealing with retail isn't the easiest thing, and maybe she came in when I was grumpy. Maybe she was upset that I didn't know who she was." Burn. [NYDN]
• Oh no. Toby Keith is launching a fashion line. It's called "TK Steelman" and will feature sleeveless shirts and oil-field insignias. Because it is for "average dudes." [People]
• It's kind of strange to read this review of the store Hollister as though it were a foreign object that fell to earth. "The shop entrance felt somewhat like a fairground ghost train..." [Telegraph]
• Whether or not consumers will go back to paying full prices for apparel after seeing deep discounts over the winter period remains an open question. (All I want to know is how long it will take for brands to realize that rather than permanently lowering the prices of their wares, the smarter move is to permanently raise them and then, hey presto, offer a "discount.") For now, Banana Republic is giving its credit card holders an extra 10% off sale and full-priced items through May 1 — meaning none of their stock is necessarily full price. [Shop Talk]
• Sometimes it's depressing just how derivative commercial photography can be. [A Photo Editor]

MEGAN: So, Spencer, I have a favorite new Internet game this morning. "McCain's Lobbyists" allows you to check out where he's getting his cash from BUT even better... every time you click a face or an issue area, the page goes "cha-ching" and moneybags pile up at his feet and that's the sort of thing that amuses me before 9 am.
SPENCER: i clicked on Juleanna Glover Weiss!
MEGAN: Me too! But mostly because she's Liz Glover's sister, and she was actually super nice to me when Liz and I worked together.
SPENCER: who, in all due credit, I recently saw ask a genuinely-intellectually-curious question of a couple Iraqi parliamentarians
oh no shit? i didn't know that
MEGAN: Also, I clicked Kirsten Chadwick because I worked with her and she hated me and vice versa.
SPENCER: anyway, the game says Juleanna profitted $9 million off a measely $1.3 million McCain donation by her clients
what a titan
MEGAN: And I'm just going to put this out there, she only ever got hired based on the strength of her connection (whatever it was) with Roy Blunt and couldn't actually run an issue up the flagpole herself or lift anything heavy legislatively without him (or his staff) doing all the work.
(Kirsten, not Juleanna)
SPENCER: except look at Rick Davis, who's McCain's campagin chairman: $2 million off a $625,000 client donation
I'm going to be playing this when I should be working on Afghanistan stuff
MEGAN: Kirsten's clients gave $1.5 mil and she (or her company) made almost $38
SPENCER: OK, Kristen clearly wins
holy shit that's so much money
MEGAN: I know!
SPENCER: And McCain got a huge financial boost after he started calling for offshore drilling
hang on while i google the stuff that my leftwing interlocutors email me...
MEGAN: Which he would totally come back to vote for, even though he missed votes for FISA, the GI bill, the Ledbetter/equal pay bill, the Medicare reimbursement bill, the stimulus package (despite actually being in DC) and 15 energy/environment bills.
SPENCER: Here's one of my favorite right-wing bloggers, James Joyner, on this shit:

The latest campaign kerfuffle is the shocking fact that John McCain is receiving significant donations from the oil industry. A new Obama ad says the amount is $2.1 million; FactCheck.org says it’s a mere $1.33 million. Either way, it’s about triple what the industry is giving to Obama.
More damning, critics say, is that there has been an uptick in oil money flowing to McCain’s coffers since he started pushing for offshore drilling, a position he previously opposed. Aha! Many on the Left seem to think this is a big winner.

well, yeah we do!
McCain mortgaged America's coastline to boost his quarterly fundraising — that's kind of a big deal!
MEGAN: Don't we all sort of love how the Maverick Campaign Finance Reformer is fundraising so prodigiously from the same money sources he was so keen to stamp out 6 years ago?
SPENCER: This is the stuff that kills me, Megan — if McCain was a Democrat who'd gone through as many reinventions in order to run for president for the last 10 years, he'd be mercilessly mocked as the basest kind of opportunist
but oh well, gotta get (get) that (that) dirt off your shoulder
and speaking of, check out the ever-charming toby keith:

During Keith's appearance on the July 30 broadcast of Beck's show, he remarked, "I think the black people would say he [Obama] don't talk, act or carry himself as a black person."

MEGAN: That shit is fucked the fuck up.
SPENCER: That's courtesy of my friend Max Blumenthal, he of the LOLtastic campaign videos
even Glenn Motherfucking Beck was astounded:

"What does that even mean?" the audibly shocked Beck replied.

"Well, I don't know what that means," Keith drawled, "but I think that that's what they would say. Even though the black society would pull for him I still think that they think in the back of their mind that the only reason he is in [the general election] is because he talks, acts and carries himself as a Caucasian."

MEGAN: I love how the fucker immediately backtracks on that shit. "Well, I don't know what that means..." Bullshit!
SPENCER: i know, what a PUSSY
when I want to take the temperature of black America, Toby Keith is my trusty thermometer
who's blacker than Toby Keith?
MEGAN: Toby Keith has probably met a black person or two in his time, and he totes has black friends so he knows what he's talking about.
SPENCER: one of his bodyguards is totally black
MEGAN: Can we make up some stereotypes about Toby Keith?
SPENCER: Toby Keith still uses VHS like a real man
Toby Keith attacks Keith Gessen on his Tumblr
MEGAN: Toby Keith doesn't talk, act or carry himself like a homosexual
Toby Keith knows how to plug in a computer but lets someone else press the keys because he doesn't want to get his hands dirty.
SPENCER: Toby Keith's favorite Dallas Cowboy is Charles Haley
MEGAN: Toby Keith doesn't like the Cowboys, anyway, he's a Pats fan.
SPENCER: Toby Keith plays his guitar with finger guards because he can't develop calluses no matter how hard he tries
MEGAN: Toby Keith used to root for the Yankees, but now he's part of the Red Sox Nation.
SPENCER: Toby Keith wouldn't have actually put a boot in the Taliban's ass because his boots are Jimmy Choo
MEGAN: But Toby Keith is intimately familiar with how to have things inserted in your butt with a minimum of pain.
Speaking of having things up your ass...
SPENCER: Toby Keith is upset that Jason Giambi shaved his mustache because he wanted to shave it
oh yeah this shit
i'd like your perspective, as a woman, on what the fuck Samantha Sault is upset with Pelosi for
what's really at work here, Megan?
MEGAN: The first thing I thought when reading it was that it was written by a petulant child.
SPENCER: the Weekly Standard is an outpost of maturity, so that can't be right
MEGAN: So, let's recap: 1. Bipartisanship means allowing John Boehner to get his way on everything and especially drilling off the coast of California where John Boehner doesn't live and Nancy Pelosi does, but that's her being mean.
2. Nancy Pelosi is on a book tour when she should be working even though it's August recess and, um, NO ONE is working because that's what happens during August recess.
SPENCER: isn't the implication that, uh, Pelosi should lie back and take it from Boehner?
MEGAN: Probably bend over, but maybe that's just a personal preference.
SPENCER: she does always wear that pearl necklace
MEGAN: 3. Also, Nancy Pelosi's book is short and uses big print because Nancy Pelosi is a 19 year old college student that thinks her professors don't notice font sizes.
(not that Little Miss Sault knows anything about that)
SPENCER: ok so Samantha Sault from the Standard doesn't like this about Pelosi:

Pelosi complains that when San Francisco mayor Joe Alioto phoned to ask her to join the city Library Commission, he asked if she was "making a great big pot of pasta e fagioli." He "assumed that the only thing I could be doing at five in the afternoon was cooking," she says—never mind that she happily stayed home "cooking meals for five children for 20 years."

i know! Who could possibly find that objectionable????
MEGAN: Also, Samantha doesn't like calling women "women," she calls them "girls." Oh, Spencer, there's nothing sexist about expecting a woman to cook all the time. I mean, not women, "girls." "Modern girls."
SPENCER: she took her money/ and bought a do-nut/ the hole's the size of this whole world
MEGAN: But Samantha does give her props for knowing her place and staying home with her kids until they were out of school, which is one of the big reasons that there aren't more women in politics. For every Adam Putnam who gets to play off the power of incumbency before his 30th birthday, there are, oh, wait, pretty much all the women in Congress who waited until they were more established.
But what Samantha giveth, Samantha taketh away: Nancy Pelosi is a harpy for not picking up her husband's dry-cleaning or ever ironing his shirts.
MEGAN: I offered, once, to pick up my ex-boyfriends dry-cleaning because we used the same dry-cleaner and he was horrified at the thought of me doing that.
SPENCER: um, i would take someone up on an offer to pick up my dry cleaning
the fucking place is always closing before i get home from work
MEGAN: But he felt like accepting it was practically sexist.
SPENCER: see, knowing a bit about the opinion-journalism game, i look at a piece like this and think a couple things:
1. Sault is apparently rather young
MEGAN: Oooh, I nailed the petulant child thing!
SPENCER: 2. Sault works at a right-wing magazine, and surely wants to succeed at it
MEGAN: Right, and we all know that you can't possibly call women anything but "girls" there. Man, she even does it in her profile piece. How incredibly annoying.
SPENCER: 3. The Weekly Standard is not exactly known for its surfeit of women writers — there's batshit-insane Noemie Emery, whom a Standardite once told me files her would-be-Peggy-Noonan pieces on yellow legal paper
SPENCER: handwritten
4. so you scrape for a story wherever you can, and a rightwing magazine is going to feel innoculated if say, you have a woman attacking woman politicians for being too feministy
and what better way to do that than to sift through Pelosi's book, find examples of her committing flagrant acts of feminism, and then clucking your teeth at her? That's going into pages for sure
MEGAN: Does she even ever get around to attacking Pelosi's politics for anything other than being not bipartisan enough, which makes me breathless with laughter when Republicans accuse Democrats of that?
SPENCER: her politics are too feministy, and that's Sault's problem with them

he says more women could run for office if they had access to "quality child care." She doesn't explain what this means or who will pay, although we can guess.

that's just fucking lazy, come on
MEGAN: Sault should have a look at the masthead 30 years ago and reconsider what the problem with feminism is.
SPENCER: or her masthead today
MEGAN: Well, but that's obviously a meritocracy. Sexism doesn't exist anymore.
SPENCER: whatever, the fact that she's getting criticized on Jezebel for her Pelosi piece will earn her lots of accolades from the other Standard staffers, who'll then expect a quick break-room handjob