• Earlier this week on The View, Joy Behar joked about Tiger Woods' mistress Rachel Uchitel: "Yeah, you-ka-tell she's a hooker." Uchitel didn't find it so funny, and her lawyer threatened to sue the show.

• The View responded by issuing this statement: "Joy Behar made a play on Ms. Uchitel's name. This was intended as a joke. We sincerely apologize for the choice of words and for any misimpression the joke may have created." [TMZ]
• Woods, for his part, is taking an "indefinite" break from golf. [ESPN]
• An unnamed Tiger Woods mistress bragged to friends that she had been trying to get pregnant by him for years. "She used to try to arrange to see Tiger when she was ovulating. She thought she'd be set for life financially if she could have Tiger's baby," said a source. Tiger had no idea, but hopefully he's learned an important lesson about birth control. [Radar Online]
• On the Today show, Jamie Jungers said she was introduced to Tiger Woods at a nightclub in 2005 and they ended up sleeping together. She said, "The more we drank, the more flirtatious it got." Isn't that how these things usually go? Jungers insists she isn't part of the escort service that some claim Tiger uses. "I got nothing from this relationship – except a broken heart," she said. [People]
• Escort-service owner Michelle Braun says of Jamie Jungers' story, "That's just a lie. Of course she's going to deny it. What girl is going to go on national TV and admit she was an escort?" [E!]
• In court today Anna Nicole Smith's two doctors and her lawyer, Howard K. Stern, plead not guilty to drug conspiracy charges. A judge refused to suspend the physicians' medical licenses, saying the case has been going on for years, so they're obviously not an "imminent danger." [AP]
• You may have heard that Courteney Cox and David Arquette are adopting a child, but her rep says it's a "complete fabrication." [Daily Express]
• Johnson & Johnson heiress Casey Johnson has been charged with first degree residential burglary and receiving stolen property for allegedly stealing lingerie, mail, clothing, and handbags from her ex-girlfriend Jasmine Lennard's home. [TMZ]
• Here's something you shouldn't regift: engagement rings. The ring Tila Tequila gave her fiancee Casey Johnson is actually the same ring she gave Courtenay Semel when they were dating."It is absolutely not real and Casey is well aware," said Courtenay. "I would not expect Tila to be able to differentiate a real diamond from a fake one. Her ring is as real as her engagement!"" [Radar Online]
• Ashlee Simpson has been cast as a supporting character in Nicole Richie's new sitcom. "Nicole adores Ashlee, and she truly believes in her talent," says a source. "With few other job prospects on the horizon, Ashlee - who desperately wants to establish herself as an actress - was feeling down until Nicole stepped up and promised: ‘I've got your back. What are girlfriends for?'" [Hollywood Scoop]
• Ick. Heidi Montag wrote on Twitter, "Here is a poem I wrote for my hubby Spencer," and linked to a 58-line poem about the flesh-bearded one. Here's a sample: "You are the most selfless, loving, perfect, caring, miraculous soul to be / Every day I am in aw (sic) of you / All of you passions motives are always so pure and true / I feel bad for all the women in the world who don't have you / But sorry ladies there is one and I don't share [Us]
• Charges have been dropped against the 22-year-old Chicago woman accused of videotaping a part of New Moon. [Hollywood Reporter]
• Def Leppard's former manager filed a lawsuit against the band for allegedly not paying her after a 2008 tour. [Radar Online]
• VIDEO: At LAX the paparazzi get too close to a woman in Axl Rose's entourage. He says, "touch her again, I'll break his fucking neck." The photographer touches her again and Axl knocks him to the ground. [TMZ]
• A woman called the police from Nelly's house after she saw "an older man with glasses and a mustache" walking around the house with a duffel bag full of video games and electronics. When the man was asked "why are you here?" he didn't answer and ran for an open window. Was it an early visit from Santa? [TMZ]
• Judy Garland and Sir Elton John were named the top gay icons by a voters on OnePoll.com. [Contact Music]
• Liza Minnelli says The Wizard of Oz isn't one of her favorite films. "I just loved her so and for some reason The Wizard of Oz bothers me when I see it. They do terrible things to her. ... That's 'cause it's my mom." [AP]
• Alyssa Milano is among the many Italian-Americans offended by Jersey Shore "My husband actually showed me the trailer on YouTube last night, and I got upset," she said. "It upset me. I was like, 'Turn that off!' So no, I don't think I'll be watching that!'" Nicole Polizzi, a.k.a. "Snookie," defended her show on The Wendy Williams Show saying, "The Italian, whatever, national, whatever their organization is, they don't understand that 'guidos' and 'guidettes' are good-looking people that, you know, like to make a scene and be center of attention and just take care of themselves... They are old-fashioned. They don't know that; they think it's offensive, because maybe in their time it was offensive, but now it's kind of a compliment. So they don't understand that and that is what we are trying to say. They are way overreacting to the show. We're 22 to 29 just having fun at the shore. They are just taking it way out of proportion." [Us]
• After a screening of her new film The Young Victoria Emily Blunt said, "I don't feel like I had a burning ambition to play the Queen of England... She learned not to mistake stubbornness for strength, and I learned about the humanity of that world." [Style]
• "I can't go two months without being pregnant, engaged, or breaking up because I'm too needy, which is always the one they love," says Kate Hudson. "I'm not needy. You kind of have to laugh it off, but it can kind of screw up other things around it." She added: "If I walk out on the street with any man, I'm dating him. I've been dating two of my best friends from high school who are like girls to me. I have a child, and there are people involved, and it's unfair to talk about somebody else, especially when you're not in that place yet to be discussing those things." [Star]
• Tori Amos says she went through years of therapy but her daughter Natashya, who was born in 2000, was "the missing piece of the puzzle for me. [Her birth] literally kicked out any kind of negativity or self-abuse that I was holding onto." [CNN]
• Dave Itzkoff, who interviewed the remaining members of the Jackson 5 for Sunday's New York Times Magazine says they "seemed mostly unaware of the aura that surrounds their surname. They were a quartet of garrulous, goofy, occasionally cantankerous men who just happen to belong to one of popular culture's most captivating and scrutinized families - and who are still coping with a devastating loss on that same tremendous scale." [N.Y.T.]
• "I am not proud of being rich," says Ricky Gervais. "I still think they are waiting for me to pick up the wrong fork." [ONTD]
• In Esquire's "What I've Learned" column, Peter Jackson admits, "I'm a technophobe. I don't know how the technology works. But I know what the technology is capable of, which is the important thing." He adds, "My thirteen-year-old daughter makes films with her friends on the weekends. Then she edits them on iMovie, and I sit with her and ask her to teach me how to do it. I'm trying to learn." [Esquire]
• 15-year-old Saoirse Ronan says of her character in The Lovely Bones, "I never really thought of Susie Salmon as someone who was dead... Although her body is dead, her soul is still there. That's what makes Susie who she is and that's what I love about her." [Reuters]
• After an Irish report found that Catholic church leaders covered up widespread sexual abuse of children for 30 years, Pope Benedict said he felt "outrage, betrayal, and shame," but Sinead O'Connor is still calling for him to step down. "Popes have had no problem voicing their opinions when we wanted contraception or divorce," O'Connor said. "No problem criticizing The Da Vinci Code. No problem criticizing Naomi Campbell for wearing a bejeweled cross. Yet when it comes to the evils done by pedophiles dressed as priests they are silent. It is grotesque, unbelievable, bizarre and unprecedented. They stand for nothing now but evil." [Reuters]
• Pierce Brosnan, who appears in Roman Polanski's upcoming film The Ghost, says of the director's arrest, "There's a sadness to the whole situation. What happened was wrong in every way, but I just wish the man well and closure for this time in his life, at this moment in time. He's a magnificent director. He's iconic in the world of cinema. I think we've made a good film, the cast is really top class and I just hope that justice will be served with some dignity and compassion, and swiftly... We had dinners, we talked, I met him before and we got on very well together, but I don't know the man. I certainly knew the history of the man, and my heart goes out to his family, to his wife and to his children, and, as I say, I hope this chapter can be closed quickly." [Daily Express]
• "I tried to lose my virginity when I was seven-years-old," Diddy tells Playboy. "I was on top of a girl who was nine or 10, but it didn't happen - so everybody doesn't have to bug out. My mother and the babysitter whipped my ass." [The Sun]

"Men and women — women want all the rights of men, but they're not asking to be called men… do you think… is it the word [marriage] is more important than the rights?" Portia, who is married to Ellen DeGeneres, was measured, confident, calm and clear in her answer: "Of course it's not the word." (I would have added, "Dumbass.") Portia went on to say, "Without the word, we don't have equal rights." Then she explained that a "lesser" term would imply that gay couples are lesser. Applause.

Oh, those View ladies had their work cut out for them this post-Thanksgiving day of Hot Topics. On the one hand, if there's anything they claim to love it's celebrity privacy, and if there's anything they claim to hate, it's domestic violence. But on the other hand, there are some very sticky rumors out there that female-on-male violence is part of the developing Tiger Woods story. So how did the ladies deal with it? By avoiding the issue as long as they could (until Whoopi mentioned it in the context of "a bizarre question" — ha!) while making wince-y faces and speaking veeerrrry slowwwly. Here's the breakdown of where each View member stands. They're just exactly like a family in crisis:

Sherri: Total, Pathological Denial: He shouldn't have to explain anything because married people get into arguments and "when did TMZ become the Bible of all news?" This situation is different for Tiger than it is for anyone else because he "has never shown himself to be any person that's of violence."

Barbara: Cautious Disbelief: "It's his business. I know that if you're in the public eye supposedly you have to reveal things about yourself but in this case it was between him and his wife."

Elisabeth: Avoidance, Ignorance: First she made a joke about how Tiger could have crashed into a tree when his entire job as a golfer is not hitting things into trees, then she insinuated that she didn't know anything about the story. Off the hook!

Joy: Ignored Source of Comic Relief: Made jokes, but nobody listens to her.

Whoopi: Lone Voice of Reason: "I have to ask a really bizarre question..if it had been reversed, and the rumors were flying that he had done something to her, would we be as saying look it's his business?"

Good question, Whoopi! Sadly, the ladies never really answered it — even trying to pretend at first that by "if the situation were reversed" meant "if Tiger Woods wasn't famous or was an elected official" instead of "If Tiger Woods was strongly rumored to have caused lacerations on the face of his wife with a golf club." Obviously, we all hope those rumors aren't true, but it's a little soon for The View to be declaring the case closed — especially since they would never do so if the situation were, you know, reversed.

And yesterday, while in a heated discussion over the Attorney General's decision to hold 9/11 terrorism trials in downtown Manhattan, Joy mentioned that Elisabeth told her in the makeup room that she was planning on moving out of New York. Elisabeth got pissed about the "personal" information disclosure.

• Harpo, Inc. has released a statement saying Oprah Winfrey will make an announcement about the future of her TV show tomorrow. An insider says she told her staff today that next season will be her last.

• Her final show will air on September 9, 2011, after 25 years on the air. [TMZ, AP]
• When Courtenay Semel is on the cover of Curve, a lesbian magazine, talking about Lindsay Lohan, she is not speaking as "her former BFF, [and] socialite," People. She is speaking as Lindsay's ex-girlfriend. As in two ladies who lived together and loved each other very much and had sex. As Semel jokes, "I'd like to to say that I'm kind of like the Don Juan of the lesbian world." [People]
• Tila Tequila has been delivering a naked rant for hours on her Ustream page, saying things like, "I am an angel ... because I am here to save the world with my army," and, "People call me an attention whore .. or whatever ... but excuse me I'm a grown ass woman and I'm confident in myself ...I think a woman's body is a beautiful thing ... that's why I'm a lesbian ... I was born naked ... anybody who is against that is gay and in denial." [TMZ]
• Tila Tequila's lawyer says her meltdown is all Shawne Merriman's fault because the "domestic violence incident" has "pushed her over the edge." He admitted there's something seriously wrong with her and he's trying to get her help. [TMZ]
• Senator John Kerry's daughter Alexandra Forbes Kerry was arrested early this morning on suspicion of DUI. A blood alcohol test showed a level of .06, which is under the legal limit in California, but she can sill be prosecuted if she was operating her car unsafely due to alcohol. [TMZ]
• Senator Kerry's rep says he "supports his daughter and will have no further comment on a private matter." [TMZ]
• A judge warned Redmond O'Neal at a progress report hearing today, saying he believes he isn't working as hard as he can at rehab. His lawer says he's "committed to recovery." [Radar Online]
• He's due back in court on December 2 and the judge said, "The report better be glowing, or there will be consequences." [Radar Online]
• Chris Brown was in court today for a progress report hearing. He said he's completed 100 hours of community service and 7 of his 52 domestic violence classes. The judge was satisfied and scheduled another hearing for February 18. [TMZ]
• Rihanna said in a radio interview that she misses Chris Brown and still listens to his songs when they come on the radio. [TMZ]
• Mark Heller thinks Kate Major's breach of contract lawsuite against his client Jon Gosselin is laughable. "Kate knows Jon Gosselin is like Obama's stimulus package. Every time she needs money, she cashes in on the few days she knew Jon Gosselin," he said. [Perez Hilton]
• Sarah Jessica Parker's surrogate, Michelle Ross, testified today against the Ohio police chief accused of breaking into her home. She said that while she was living in a motel, someone broke into her home in Ohio and stole ultrasound pictures, surrogacy files, tax information, and a plaster cast of her belly from when she was pregnant with her own son. [AP]
• Amy Winehouse's father Mitch was asked to be on I'm A Celebrity... Get Me Out Of Here, but he says, "When I told Amy I had the interview, she went mad - she says, 'You're not doing it dad,' she wouldn't let me do it." [The Mirror]
• Levi Johnston sees a lot of himself in his son Tripp. "He is very funky," Johnston says. "He's got a lot of energy. He's always looking to mess things up, break things. He's crazy." [People]
• BMI, which enforces music royalties, claims an Idaho bar has been playing songs by artists including John Fogerty and Taylor Swift without permission. [TMZ]
• Miley Cyrus is still dating Liam Hemsworth, her co-star in The Last Song. "I've never gotten along with someone so well," says Miley. "I was a little anxious about making this movie; I wanted everything to be perfect. To go on set and feel insecure was a totally new element for me. But he felt the same way. He admitted his insecurities, and it was really nice to have someone who understands me for once." [People]
• When Sofia Vergara was asked why she joked about rape on The View yesterday, she just laughed. [TMZ]
• Did James Franco pretend to text to get out of an awkward situation? [N.Y. Magazine]
• David Beckham ws wearing a walking boot on his right boot because he suffered a "tender foot" after receiving a "series of knocks." A rep says he's already better. [TMZ]
• The LAPD has received numerous noise complaints about Paris Hilton in the five months that she's been living with Doug Reinhardt and they say the next time anyone in the house breaks the law there will be "tickets or arrests." [TMZ]
• Levi Johnston was invited to appear on DWTS, but he says, "I'm not sure it's my thing." [Extra]
• Drew Barrymore and Justin Long are still together, but she kicked him out of her house because, "Drew really had it with being Justin's babysitter at home," says a source. "And it's not just that he made a mess, it's his attitude. He gets mopey and is a big-time couch potato. She isn't thrilled about seeing this side of him." [Star]
• Forbes released a list of the most overpaid actors in Hollywood, comparing their salaries to how much their films make. Will Ferrell, Ewan McGregor, Tom Cruise, Drew Barrymore, and Leonardo DiCaprio all made the top ten. [Perez Hilton]
• Local L.A. celebrity/2003 California gubnatorial candidate Angelyne is suing the City of Los Angeles for not delivering her fan mail. [THR, Esq.]
• Lost executive producer Carlton Cuse says the series' final season will begin on February 2 at 9 pm. [N.Y.T.]
• Jim Carrey's daughter Jane married Alex Santana last weekend. "It was a beautiful day. Simple and sweet," said Carrey. "I wish them everything that love has given us." [People]
• Avril Lavigne, who recently filed for divorce from Deryck Whibley, was seen out with Wilmer Valderama. [People]
• Steven Tyler's Aerosmith bandmates are suggesting that he may be abusing drugs again. "I think that he needs help and that attention needs to be put to his health," said drummer Joey Kramer. "He's got some bad influences in his life right now and he's making poor choices." [People]
• Brigitte Bardot asked the government of Catalonia to ban bullfighting, which she called, "an incredibly sadistic spectacle." [AFP]
• ''I would never have said I believe in ghosts, until I saw one - and I've seen a ghost with my own eyes," says Sting. ''I was in bed one night, a very old house I used to live in. And I woke up at three in the morning, bolt upright, looked into the corner of the room and thought I saw Trudie standing there with a child - our child - in her arms, staring at me. And I thought 'well, that's strange - why is she standing in a corner, staring at me?'. And I then reached next to me and there was Trudie, and I suddenly got this terrible chill. And she woke up and said 'Gosh, who is that?' and she saw this woman and a child in the corner of the room.'' [The Telegraph]
• Pedro Almodovar says he once tried to write about sadomasochism in a film script but he couldn't do it. "As I was beginning my research I found it to be so horrifying that I erased the character from the movie, because I wasn't capable," he says. "It's like having a phobia!" [AP]
• Norah Jones says when she was making her new album The Fall, "I realized, I think, what I want to do is work with some different sounds. I figured that the best way to do that was to try and step outside of my comfort zone a little bit, and work with some different musicians and a different producer. It just felt like a good time to do that." [AP]
• "People are hung up about sex and can't even talk to their children about it. I got no sex education at all, not in school or church, not at home. Some people realize that the world has changed, and others don't. When people think offensive remarks about homosexuals, it offends me. Many are offended ... it may offend their religions ... some stick to their religions. What's behind it is homophobia-the worry, the fear, the life. It's a perfectly normal, minority group of people in the world who should not be discriminated against whatsoever. People don't get it who have never met a homosexual person, or read or watch anti-gay people in the media, but when they discover that maybe their child is gay, there can be the most amazing turnaround. It means that people have to discuss the situation, and the situation is that there's no need to make life miserable for those who contribute to the community and the nation. They should be embraced." — Sir Ian McKellan [BlackBook Magazine]
• Is Robert Downey Jr. quitting acting?! "I'm fucking really good at what I do - and have been for a long time, so I don't waver on that," he says. "But here's the thing: I can only be a guy on a call sheet probably, I don't know, maybe a couple more times. It's something I'm so grateful to have in my palm, and yet I already see its inevitable decay." Or not. He adds, "If Sherlock Holmes performs well, I could be busy for the next 5 or 7 or 10 years." [EW]
• Good news for Jennifer Aniston (or so the tabloids will surely say): John Mayer sees himself getting married and having kids. "I'm pretty Norman Rockwell-like, so I can see myself in that setting," he says. "But I might also have expectations in life that don't match my behavior in life. I mean, I'm a musician who travels the world playing songs to thousands of people at the same time — and yet sometimes I believe that I'm going to be able to blacktop a driveway and drop kids off to school. I think they're both going to have to give a little bit." [CNN]
• Melissa Joan Hart says she and her husband Mark Wilkerson, "Actually prefer date lunches. Date nights, we're always tired, and we figure if the kids are in bed then we're just wasting our time, so we really like lunches. We get the nanny to come over and we go out to lunch and have a blast." [People]
• Chaz Bono says getting a sex change is the best decision he ever made: "Life is short and life is precious. This is who I am. I need to finally be who I am," said Bono. "To me, gender is between your ears, not between your legs. I've felt male as far back as I can remember." [AP]
• Olivia Wilde says she enjoyed working with her husband Tao Ruspoli on his documentary Fix because, "The most important element of the relationship between an actor and a director is trust, and because we have that build in to our relationship, I felt incredibly comfortable being directed by Tao. I was able to take risks, improvise, be completely un-selfconscious, without worrying about whether or not the director understood my intention. No one understands me better than Tao, and therefore I felt completely liberated under his direction." [Gothamist]
• General Hospital executive producer Jill Farren Phleps says, "Everybody was so impressed," with James Franco's performance on the soap. "There was an enormous amount of respect and a lot of pleasure that the crew and the cast had in seeing this guy come and take it so seriously, do it so well and do such justice to it." [CNN]
• Dakota Fanning says she and Kristen Stewart share a passionate kiss in The Runaways. "We're playing Joan Jett and Cherie Currie and they're best friends in the film and became really close in real life," said Fanning, who explained the kiss saying, "That's something that went down back in the '70s." [Us]

While I think that Perez Hilton—who has repeatedly called Prejean a bitch, among other nasty things—has been out of line, I don't believe the same is true for Whoopi. Whoopi referred to Prejean's hostile and defensive demeanor and attitude as "bitchy" during an interpersonal exchange. There's a big difference between calling someone a name, and describing someone's behavior. The former is an insult and the latter is an inference.

Elisabeth didn't seem to grasp that, and accused "the liberals" of "hating" Prejean "for no reason." You can be sure that Joy checked her on that.

Whoopi and Sherri bring up a good point when asking Carrie if she was a Christian when she made her sex tape, and trying to explain to her how people could see hypocrisy in preaching about how others should live according to her Christian values, and then not complying with them herself. This point, however, was lost on her: she simply focused on how mean Perez Hilton was to her.


Later in the interview, Carrie became flustered and even more defensive when Barbara asked her about a portion of her book that claims that describes Donald Trump's behavior—which she intimates was inappropriate—around the women in the pageant.

Feeling an inevitable attack from Joy Behar's progressive lips coming on, Elisabeth backpedaled a bit, saying the decision is "never an easy one, mark my words."

Joy did have something to say - it just wasn't what Elisabeth was expecting.

For some people, believe it or not, Elisabeth, it is a very easy decision. I know that's hard to understand, but there are people who do not think anything of it.

Speaking from personal experience, that's true. At the same time, just because someone doesn't get all precious about terminating a pregnancy doesn't mean that she did it for "superficial reasons". Or that she should be forced to look at pictures of, well, anything.

1.) 105-year-old celebrates birthday at male revue

Love her. I also love her door-knocker earrings, purple nails, and Baby Phat track suit.

2.) Glassy-eyed Fanilow
Paula Abdul attended a Barry Manilow concert, where Entertainment Tonight caught up with her backstage.

3.) Hailey Glassman
Jon Gosselin's girlfriend was on The Insider this week to discuss how hard it is being famous. In this clip, she pays Kate Gosselin a compliment, then insults her, then goes into detail about when Jon first stuck his ween in her.

4.) Boys don't cry.
Mary Hart tried her damnedest—during her exclusive interview with Chaz Bono regarding his sex reassignment process—to get Chaz to break down and cry over how horrible all of this must've been for him. Chaz wouldn't bite. It's kinda great watching him kind of get off on being withholding.

5.) Big-ass joint
In the History Channel's docu-drama Manson, the reenactment of Dennis Wilson getting high with the Family seemed cartoonish.

6.) Man down, code 10!
Keyshia Cole's mom Frankie hosted BET's Red Carpet pre-show for the Hip Hop Awards.

7.) Babs!
She was in rare form this week.

Really rare.

8.) Holly Montag
Who would've thought that Heidi's sister would turn out to spike the punch of The Hills with her dance "fights."

9.) "Nuptial Decadence"
Why does that term sound so delicious?

10.) Ew.
I don't know which is more disturbing: the fact that the woman in this commercial is afraid of her husband, or the fact that frozen mussels actually exist.

1.) Who farted?
Bigger than the mystery of whether or not this whole thing was a publicity stunt is the mystery of which Heene family member's heinie gave a Bronx cheer.


Entertainment Tonight is all over this thing.


2.) Speaking of potty humor…
I love this girl.


3.) "Well, fuck you."


4.) 12¢ Cheeseburgers


5.) Wendy Williams fucked up a lot this week.
More than usual.


6.) This kook says she's spoken to Michael Jackson since he died.


7.) Balloon Boy will not steal Jon Gosselin's thunder!
This week Jon was, again, all over The Insider and Entertainment Tonight (which led to the lawsuit TLC filed against him today). After his appearance in court earlier this week, when a judge ordered him to return $180,000 he took from Kate and his children, Jon appeared tense. Here, he explains his clenched jaw.


Entertainment Tonight managed to get Rod Stewart's opinion on Jon, as though Rod is some kind of father of the year. (Rod's children have, in fact, been on reality TV, and one of them appeared on Celebrity Rehab, which is a giant parental fail.)


8.) Asians don't need Botox, according to Jon Gosselin.
But he would like to get new hair plugs.


9.) Jon is trying to distance himself from Michael Lohan.


And that's probably a good thing, considering that Lindsay's dad filmed an episode of Maury this week, which, as of yet, has no scheduled air date.


10.) 30 Rock is back!

In fact, Rachel believes that anyone who is pro-choice should not be awarded the Nobel Peace Prize, saying, "We wouldn't have world peace until we ended abortion." But this is really nothing new. On the third season of The Real World, Rachel, a young Republican, often got in heated political debates with her left-leaning San Francisco roommates, particularly "bed-wetting liberal" Judd.

Rachel is also not new to The View. She's auditioned for a permanent position on the panel twice before, but was passed over each time, first in favor of Lisa Ling, and later in favor of Hasselbeck. This morning, Rachel—who married Real World: Boston roommate Sean—announced that she's pregnant with her sixth child.

1.) Jon Gosselin
I know it's nearly impossible that anyone in America managed to miss him since he was all over TV talking about how he doesn't want to be on TV anymore. On Monday on The Insider, Jon faced off with Nancy Grace. Later in the week, The Insider tried to propel that insanity by airing "footage you didn't see" from the event. Here, Jon admits that his earrings are CZs.


Jon also ran back and forth between The Insider and Entertainment Tonight, showing "bank statements" proving that he did not steal money from Kate.










However, even the correspondent on The Insider recognized that this one transaction receipt proves absolutely nothing.




2.) "I'm showing America how it works."
God, he's like the fountain of spoof.


3.) In other grossness: Tamerlane Phillips.
Remember two weeks ago when people didn't care about the Gosselins for four days because Mackenzie Phillips' rape and incest bombshell stole the show? Tamerlane Phillips misses those days.


4.) The best intervention ever, courtesy of It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia.





5.) Kaity Tong Drunk?
Speaking of interventions…sheesh.


This man-on-the-street from the story she was introducing is awesome.


6.) Shut up, Joy!


7.) People are still getting "The Rachel"?


8.) Does Kim know that wig hair doesn't grow back?


9.) Khloe Kardashian's 9 Carats


10.) WWWWD?
She would think WWJJD.

In an interview last week on Entertainment Tonight, Jon insisted that his decision to halt production of Kate Plus 8 was not about money, saying, "My kids are more important to me than your dollars." However, since then, he has reportedly emptied $230,000 from his family's joint bank account, money that was set aside for paying the household bills.


This morning, a visibly shaken Kate was on Today, giving very specific details about the family's finances, and telling Meredith Vieira that she was left with only $1,000, and can not pay her bills. (Jon and his lawyers have released a statement to Entertainment Tonight, sort of denying her claims.)


On Friday, Jon was a guest on The Insider—which has a new View-ish panel setup—and said that 80% of the money he and his family have earned has been put into a trust for his children. However, he said that the trust is "revocable," meaning that he has access to the money in it. He admitted that he "absolutely" plans on dipping into this trust.


In a phone interview on The View today, Kate said that she would work at McDonald's, if need be, to support her children, but would obviously prefer the larger paychecks from TLC.


Jon, who has been claiming that he wants his children off the show because the lack of privacy is "harmful" to them, disclosed on The Insider the last time he had sexual intercourse with Kate.


He then lied, over and over and over again about various rumors. (Please, he's never smoked a joint in his life? Didn't he live in a Hawaii for a while?)


After denying scandal after scandal, Jon apologized to people for his "mistakes." He also said he believes he will survive this particular one.


But will he survive Nancy Grace? Jon will be facing off with her tonight on The Insider.


Oh, and Hailey weighs in, via Twitter, if anyone cares.


BREAKING NEWS: Kate Gosselin Files Motions To Get $230k Back From Jon [Radar]