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Posts Tagged “

The Simpsons

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unicorn power

Happy Father's Day, Love Lisa Simpson

We meant to include this clip in our Lisa Simpson feminist montage, but we totally forgot to add it. (Oops!) But no harm done, because it actually is the perfect thing to post at the end of this terrible, horrible, no good, very bad week, as it's all about Father's Day and unicorns(!). Lisa decides to make a heartfelt gift for her dad (a crafty little book featuring father and daughter unicorns riding off into the sunset on the backs of ponies), instead of just buying something impersonal, but Homer, being a jerkass, stomps all over her feelings when he isn't very thrilled to receive it. It puts Lisa in a bad mood, and she has a freak out at school. Clip above.
Eariler: Lisa Simpson: Feminist Hero
The First Unicorn
What's The Deal With The Relationship Between Girls And Unicorns?

6:00 PM on Fri Jun 13 2008
By Slut Machine
14,321 views, 146 comments

Latest by icedog: I was a turd to my Dad all through my teen years, which I got away with because he was a nice guy, and then after he died when I was 18 I realized he only knew me as an more »

girl crush

Lisa Simpson: Feminist Hero

I've always sort of thought of Lisa Simpson as a Jezebel-in-training, what with her activism, enthusiasm for hobbies and books, love of cartoons and animals, and regard for feelings and unicorns, but it recently dawned on me that Lisa might just be the most visible, mainstream feminist of our time. I never thought I could worship a fictional 8-year-old so much. So here's a compilation of the best of Lisa's most Jezebelian moments. Enjoy!

7:00 PM on Tue Jun 3 2008
By Slut Machine
19,669 views, 125 comments

Latest by n/a: What about Leela from Futurama, from the creator of The Simpsons. She is another smart and funny feminist. I think we need some more kick-ass women like Leela, Buffy, Lisa etc. A chick with wit. Amen. more »

leftovers

Strippers Lose Jobs To The Internet • The Simpsons Are Back on Venezuelan TV

Print journalists aren't the only ones losing jobs, strippers feel the burden of the digital age. • Iranian says Barbies are "destructive" and must be stopped. • Incarcerated 400-pound man loses 100 pounds, sues county for underfeeding. • Six conservative women talk about dating whiny liberal men. • Two teenagers are jailed for life for killing a goth woman. • Mexicans try to quell the anti-emo riots by promoting diversity among teens. • Lourdes basically has the coolest mom hand-me-downs to pick from. • National Lampoon launches website to rate prostitutes. • Scientists just realize that periods are awesome, can repair hearts. • American Family Association attack soap on lackluster gay kiss. • An ironically long article on shorthand text speak, lol grwn ups r so lam3! • The Simpsons are back in Venezuela! • Baseball star Roger Clemens had a relationship with Mindy McCready when she was 15 years old (he was 28 and married). • Easy mistake to make: Woman attacks boyfriend, thinking he is a porn actor. • "Chinese eatery specializes in penis." That is all you need to know.

5:30 PM on Mon Apr 28 2008
By maria
1,356 views, 45 comments

Latest by ManhattanManHatin': @MansonNixon: Yeah! CANKLES TRUMP EVERYTHING! Holy shit dude, cankles are not even close to being on my list of unattractive criteria. I would take a becankled girl over a self-righteous bitch anyday. more »

clips

The Simpsons: Muumuus Are The Uniform For Working From Home

Last night, a rerun of The Simpsons aired in which Homer purposely gains weight so he can live out his dream: Working from home. As someone who works from home, I can tell you that when you aren't required to be around other human beings for days on end, things like diet, hygiene and wardrobe quickly plummet on your list of priorities. It's really easy to wake up in the morning, roll over and start working from bed, transition to the couch and never once make a pit stop to put on a bra, brush your teeth or take a shower. And the constant snacking and sedentary lifestyle can make wearing pants, well, uncomfortable, so I could totally relate to the scene of Homer shopping for some work clothes, and picking out a muumuu. Clip above.

7:00 PM on Wed Apr 23 2008
By Slut Machine
10,459 views, 155 comments

Latest by n/a: Bah! I am a corporate slave, who got offered a really sweet work-from-home contract last week. I'm waiting patiently for the official paperwork, so I can sign that shit. I work BETTER from home; I'm at work right now, obsessively more »

clips

Lisa Simpson's Feminist Heroes Were All Smokers

Last night's episode of The Simpsons struck a particular chord with me because it was all about Lisa's newfound interest in smoking, which she undertakes in order to lose weight and handle the stress of ballet class. I quit smoking in April 2003 with the help of Zyban, but about a month ago, I picked it up again, due to stress from my job, and admittedly, a desire to avoid stuffing my face with food while I'm at home all day. In the clip above, Lisa is visited by smoke ghosts in the forms of her feminist heroes — Lillian Hellman, Queen Elizabeth I, Margaret Mead, Lauren Bacall [A ghost? Isn't Bacall still alive? -Ed.] — who underscore the fact that millions of otherwise-intelligent women fall prey to the "allure" of cigarettes. And with that I say: "This one is my last pack. I swear!"

Related: New Research Dispels Myth That Cigarettes Make Teenage Girls Thinner, But Smoking May Stunt Growth Of Teenage Boys [Science Daily]
Earlier: How To Market Death To Women: Make It Sexy, Make It Pink

7:00 PM on Mon Mar 31 2008
By Slut Machine
9,480 views, 174 comments

Latest by SydneyGal: @raelite: Elizabeth I did smoke a pipe - in fact she was the 2nd person in Europe to smoke, after Walter Raleigh who brought the stuff back for her from Virginia. Ironic considering it was thought out of hte question more »

clips

We Choo Choo Choose Ralph Wiggum

Back on The Simpsons season four, when Ralph Wiggum was just a dumb loser—before he evolved into the lovable mildly retarded kid we cherish today—he fell in love with Lisa Simpson because she was the only kid with room enough in her bleeding heart to give the reject in the class a Valentine's Day card. "I Choo Choo Choose You" is such a classic that it really should be sold in stores. But since it's not (at least to our knowledge), you can go here, and print out a high-res version for your Valentine today.

1:00 PM on Thu Feb 14 2008
By Slut Machine
5,612 views, 124 comments

Latest by n/a: Man, so many quotable quotes in one short clip! And "So...do you like...stuff?" remains one of my tried and true pickup lines. more »

clips

Lisa Simpson Is A Ghost World Fan

Last night's Simpsons episode was a rerun, but a good one. Comic Book Guy goes out of business because an alternative comic book store opens across the street, providing a better and cooler service to the kids of Springfield. The Simpsons attend an in-store signing with Maus author Art Spiegelman, Watchmen author and notorious recluse Alan Moore, and Daniel Clowes, creator of Ghost World. Unsurprisingly, Lisa Simpson is a Ghost World fan, because it makes her feel "less alone." She'd totally be a Jezebel reader if she were human!

5:40 PM on Mon Feb 11 2008
By Slut Machine
3,516 views, 53 comments

Latest by n/a: oh man I'm such a Daniel Clowes geek..I love that..and I love this place! can't wait to see this more »

clips

The Simpsons Makes Us Laugh At Sexist Beer Commercials

The clip above, a Duff commercial from an old Simpsons episode that shows how beer can make humorless feminists into sexy ladies, reminded us that the Super Bowl is this Sunday. (Want a "girls' guide" to the game? Click here.) And even though some of us aren't into football, the NFL championship game is still a big deal, if only for the big budget, often-sexist commercials shown in between plays. Sure, the bikini-babe factor during the Super Bowl festivities seems to have been toned down over the past few years (thanks Janet Jackson!) but we're still gonna tune in this Sunday to see if there's something we can get pissed off about.


Related: Football...For Ladies [Radar]
2008 Lingerie Bowl Canceled [UPI]

11:00 AM on Thu Jan 31 2008
By Slut Machine
6,687 views, 105 comments

Latest by bifteck-frites: @lalaland13 @wildflowerpower @SouthernSatine: No problem. Love them pups. @ExtensionOfBob: They better follow through on that! If not you have the right to hurt somebody. @jerseylicious: I actually did not know that about the "players" -- that makes me very happy more »

clips

Marge Simpson's Brief Brush With Radical Feminism In The '90s

Last night's episode of The Simpsons was a flashback look at Marge and Homer's life in the early '90s before they were married, when Homer was in a grunge band called Sadgasm and Marge had a Melrose Place-y hairdo while attending college. The nearly didn't make it, since Marge briefly fell in love with her douche bag professor — a male feminist who tries to tell women how they should behave and who they should be. The Simpsons writers nailed his type perfectly. Clip above.

6:00 PM on Mon Jan 28 2008
By Slut Machine
16,766 views, 89 comments

Latest by n/a: Yep, it's true.@katastic: more »

Reader Roundup Best Comment of the Day, in response to Lisa Simpson's Love/Hate Relationship With A Girl Named Stacy: "Oh, you're right, Malibu Stacy. Fuck grad school. I'ma focus on getting back to my birth weight." We say: 6 pounds, 9 ounces of pure SEXY! • Worst, in response to Tom Cruise's Grip On Katie: Courtly? Or Controlling?: "TOM U R SO TINY AND CUTE. 2 BAD U HAVE SUCH A BIG A..H..., DONT FALL INTO YOURSELF. DID YOUR MOMMY WASH U TOO MUCH IS THAT WHY YOU SHRUNK?" We say: someone's been hanging out with Mrs. Dranklesworth today.

57 comments

clips

Lisa Simpson's Love/Hate Relationship With A "Girl" Named Stacy


Lisa Simpson is sort of the cartoon embodiment of a young Jezebel. [Here's the cartoon embodiment of an old one. -Ed.] She's curious, outspoken, dedicated, and tries to be socially-conscious. But she's still vulnerable to the trappings of femininity, like body image issues, and easily seduced by the fun indulgences of girlhood, like ponies, unicorns, and her Malibu Stacy doll. In a clip from an old Simpsons episode, Lisa comes to the same realization about Stacy that most of us came to about Barbie — that her image and cultivated personality are sexist representations of women. The problem is, she is fun, and pretty, and lives in a pink mansion! God! Why is being a girl so fucking complicated?

7:00 PM on Wed Jan 9 2008
By Slut Machine
5,972 views, 119 comments

Latest by Cunning_Linguist: Wow. This was actually my favorite episode of the Simpsons when I was a kid. It all suddenly makes sense. more »

clips

Dear Lisa Simpson: We Feel You On The Body Dysmorphia Thing


This clip is from a Simpsons episode that originally aired in 2004 as part of the series' 16th season, but we caught a recent rerun of it and it struck us that it might just be one of the best Simpsons episodes ever. It's the one where Marge takes Nelson under her wing, but what's even better is the subplot in which Lisa develops an eating disorder after girls at school make fun of her for having a big butt. The stuff she goes through is cartoonish, obvs, but she really hits a nerve when she says, "I know this obsession with thinness is unhealthy and anti-feminist...but that's what a fat girl would say!" Anyway, as Homer would say, this episode is funny 'cause it's true — in a sort of painful way. (Oh, and BTW, we left in the part where Nelson's mom's panties fall down. You're welcome.)

7:00 PM on Wed Jan 2 2008
By Slut Machine
8,164 views, 60 comments

Latest by Rooo sez BISH PLZ: @DCDomer: "My other favorite Lisa moment is the episode where she refuses to throw the spelling bee even though she's promised admission to the Seven Sisters school of her choice. The looks she gives her parents when she realizes they more »

Jezebels Speaking of sports! Even macho, angry sports fans are talking about Jezebel. The name, that is. An irate Dallas Cowboys fan called into ESPN radio the other day, expressing his disdain for the woman who is leading to the demise of the Cowboys: Jessica Simpson. Said the caller: "Man, you know women and sports don't mix. This Jezebel Simpson..." Maybe he was just mixing up Jessica and the real Jezebel Simpson? [GMA]

54 comments

Pigs On The Wing Two Pink Floyd "Animals" references in major pop culture offerings within the space of two years? First there was Children of Men; now Rolling Stone reports that, in honor of the release of the DVD of The Simpsons Movie in Britain tomorrow, workers inflated and sailed a giant inflatable pig above London's Battersea Power Station. There's even a video. This may be interesting to no one but me (Anna), but there's fuck-all going on today, so there you have it. [Rolling Stone]

9 comments

clips

A Simpsons Halloween Clip To Scare The Weave Off Tyra's Head


Did you know that Tyra Banks is afraid of dolphins? She once told People magazine "I've been afraid of [dolphins] ever since I was 8 or 9. I have dreams that I am in a pool and there are dolphins bumping me and I'm frightened." We've really always loved this phobia of hers, because like Tyra herself, it's sofa king ridiculous. So, as a Halloween treat, let's scare Tyra with this old "Treehouse of Horror" Simpsons Halloween special, in which killer dolphins take over Springfield.

4:00 PM on Wed Oct 31 2007
By Slut Machine
3,422 views, 26 comments

Latest by n/a: Tyra Banks scares the dolphins not the other way around. Her weaves scare the hell out of them, so she is making up this story. Tyra has gills on the bridge ofher nose and her forehead when she wrinkles her more »