Would "Push Presents" Be So Obnoxious If They Weren't Called "Push Presents"?

Moe — Thu, 06 Dec 2007 14:00:00 EST

You know how sometimes, a man will give his wife a nice piece of jewelry or whatevs when she gives birth to a baby, just to be like, "Hey, sweetie, I know you feel a million kinds of gross right now and can barely focus on something as inanimate and utterly pointless — not to mention earlobe-depleting! — as earrings, but like, maybe if we make it through the next few years okay you'll be able to put these on at night and think about the guy who, when you were in pain, gave you something sparkly and grinned sheepishly until you popped out his spawn"? Well now this thing is called a "push present," according to the New York Times, and boyyyyyy were Anna and Jessica and a half gazillion of you tipsters offended by passages like this:

Chris Beggini, a 43-year-old mutual fund manager in Radnor, Pa., didn't know about the practice until his wife, Jennifer, straightened him out. "We talked about how she had nine months of difficulty, and 'Aren't I the good soldier?' blah blah blah," he recalled. So when the Begginis begat Abigail in 1999, Ellie in 2002, and Julia last year, Mr. Beggini responded with earrings, a bracelet and what he jokingly calls a "suffer ring."

Said Anna:

I have a theory about these: that they emerged primarily in upper class milieus in which having a baby/gaining weight/etc. is considered some sort of SACRIFICE of one's precious shopping/socializing time and taut young body. Maybe I'm being unfair/judgmental/overly broad but in my mind, only a superficial, wealthy woman would think she should get DIAMONDS for having a goddamn baby. (I make this judgment probably because one of the women I know who got such presents is a millionaire Upper East Sider.) Women give birth every day ALL OVER THE WORLD in much worse conditions than those found in, say, Columbia Presbyterian, and honestly, if I had a baby and wanted a "gift" in return for having one — isn't a baby gift enough?? — I'd ask my husband to give some money to a mother(s) who actually NEEDED IT.

Added Jessica:

One could argue a baby isn't a "gift" in the first place!! It's a GODDAMN LIFE!

And concluded a tipster:

Rather than a natural occurrence, rich white woman consider having a baby a major inconvenience.

Yeah, okay, but here's the thing: having a baby is a major inconvenience. Buying a ring is not. These are facts of life, as natural and time worn as the fact that nothing is fair, and once upon a time a ring could simply be a token that a husband was capable of stepping outside himself and seeing the situation for what it is: 10 months that he can drink, dress and go about his daily routine like normal while she's getting all gross and sweaty and shit, and yeah, aw, maybe i should get her something special. But no; now it's just another gross harbinger of end times brought to you by the luxury goods industry on the backs of African slave labor. Thanks, late capitalism!

A Bundle Of Joy Isn't Enough? [NY Times]
Related: Get Your Rocks Off [Philadelphia Weekly]

Poors Continue Relentless Campaign of Robbing The Rich of Their Time-Honored Pursuits

heather — Thu, 16 Aug 2007 10:30:00 EDT

Sometimes when we're reading the NY Times "Thursday Styles" section we like to imagine the writers coming up with their ideas. In the movie in our mind, today's story by Natasha Singer about the democratization (read: "down-marketization") of plastic surgery began with an anecdote over lemon waters at Bergdorf's. "Natasha," says a woman who looks like Trey's mom on Sex in the City. "My maid had had collagen injections. Can you imagine?" [Sighs, shakes head] "They'll be buying Vuitton next!" [chortling, clinking of glasses] We know it doesn't really happen this way, that "Thursday Styles" reporters are cubicle drones just like us (albeit, cubicle drones who can go into special trances in which they are visited by the ghost of Diana Vreeland.) But back to plastic surgery: Turns out when it comes to face-lifts and breast implants, the poor are just like the wealthy!

Dr. Paul A. Blair, a facial surgeon in Hurricane, W.Va., said his patients have included high-school teachers, truck drivers and school-bus drivers. Dr. L. Mike Nayak, a facial surgeon in St. Louis, said that his patients include blue-collar or lower-salary professionals — "teachers, retirees, psychologists, regular middle-class working folks."
"I have a couple of jail wardens," Dr. Nayak said.

Scary! Ms. Singer decides she better check in with her people (upper-class, "educated") to see what they think: "The demographic is teachers, law enforcement officers and stay-at-home moms," says Laurie L. Essig, who teaches sociology at Middlebury College in Vermont, and is writing a book about the economics of plastic surgery. Singer deduces that the influence of reality TV and celebrity magazines (She omits books, but surely these people don't read!) is what's responsible. Quelle horreur! How will Ms. Singer feel, we wonder, when she finds out that the Poors' addiction to Poison is what's keeping Dior afloat?

Q: Who Is the Real Face of Plastic Surgery? [NY Times]

Jezebel: the rich

Would "Push Presents" Be So Obnoxious If They Weren't Called "Push Presents"?

Poors Continue Relentless Campaign of Robbing The Rich of Their Time-Honored Pursuits