Dear Would-Be Crazy Ex-Girlfriends Of The World, Stop Being So Damn Rational

Moe — Wed, 19 Mar 2008 17:30:58 EDT

I've been thinking about Ethan Hawke singing that song last night he wrote about Uma Thurman being a "big fat beast." And John Mayer using his blog to talk about how he no longer wants to talk to Jessica Simpson since he boned her in his helicopter or something. Time for a post about crazy exes! Here's a blog post about a girl who started a Facebook group to get back at her ex-boyfriend.

So, look I know this group is ridiculous and immature and really classless, but I just cannot get over how unfairly this ended. I am over ****, I'm just not over the disrespect, you know? You don't have to actually hate *** to join this group cause let's face he is pretty adorable and he is pretty great to go to a party with.

Oh for fuck's sake, woman, where's the rage? She goes on.

The only intention of this group is that *** maybe has to endure a couple of awkward conversations. Like what if a bunch of people went up to *** and were like "You got [scorned lady] pregnant? What the fuck?" That would be a pretty fun conversation.
Anyway, yeah, I think there is beauty in the breakdown and I kinda' just want to see what life is like if I live totally impulsively. Good things come from bad situations right? And, besides I am about as dramatic as it gets anyway. Me and Britney...

Girl, if I may, stop being so damn rational. Emotions aren't about "respect." You're pissed; run with that! Allow yourself to become a parody of your heartbroken self! Be Lilli Taylor in Say Anything if you have to. It's not fun, but speaking as someone who sits in my house all day and interacts with no one, it actually does seem kind of fun! Like being alive. Don't apologize for anything; he fucked you over; he's a dick. I once bought the URL to Fuck-[Ex-Boyfriend's Name].com and wrote a hyperbolically angry blog there for about three days. He told me later he thought that was kind of cool.

Facebook Vengeance: Maybe Tempting But Bad, Bad, Bad [Washington City Paper]

On Jemima And Imran, And Other Famous Exes We Think Still Occasionally Bone

Moe — Thu, 15 Nov 2007 18:00:53 EST

Jemima Khan, the British socialite who does it with Hugh Grant and used to be married to hot cricket player turned Pakistani politician Imran Khan, showed up to protest Pervez Musharraf's declaration of emergency rule yesterday. "I never usually talk to press, but I am talking to press just to keep the focus on what Musharraf is doing in Pakistan," she said. "I want to keep up the pressure and highlight that the people affected by this are from all walks of life. It is teachers, lawyers, students, journalists - these people have been targeted while known terrorists are on the loose and have not been put on trial despite Musharraf's words." Now, okay, speaking of terrorists, just over the summer members of the party Imran founded used England's knighthood of Salman Rushdie as a chance to take to the streets and praise Osama Bin Laden, so the politics of all this is really tricky. But speaking of Padma's ex-husband, I just want to use this space right now as an appreciation for the Big Ex-Ship.Jennie Lewis and Blake Sennett of Rilo Kiley.

Did you read that story? FASCINATION STREET. Also: Taye Diggs and Audra McDonald on last night's Private Practice. (Jennie's reference.) The Big Ex is the person for whom you'd fly to Haiti at a moment's notice, the person you'd lend your credit card and your couch and the contents of your brain, if it's necessary. You never talk shit on the Big Ex. You are a much better person to the Big Ex than you are your boyfriend, and you are a much better person to the Big Ex now than you were before you were "former." Now, it's not usually entirely that simple/selfless, and I have no idea what the fuck is going on with Jemima and Imran, but here's to hoping she flies to Lahore for some reunion sex when he gets released from wherever they're holding him.

And, oh yeah, that he's released from wherever they're holding him.

Jezebel: the ex factor

Dear Would-Be Crazy Ex-Girlfriends Of The World, Stop Being So Damn Rational

On Jemima And Imran, And Other Famous Exes We Think Still Occasionally Bone