I took Mariska's self-assessment in a different light. I sincerely doubt that Hargitay is trying to tell Self readers that she's at all overweight. I think it's more that terms like "full figured," "curvy," "plus-size," and "big-boned," have become so obfuscated by the dieting industrial complex that their original meanings are essentially moot at this point.

In mag parlance, Gisele Bundchen and Jennifer Hudson are both "curvy," (which these days means "possessing breasts") and Whitney from America's Next Top Model is "plus-size." We got an angry email after New York Times reviewer Manohla Dargis described Keira Knightley as "a big-boned beauty" because the reader had assumed that Dargis was calling Knightley fat. The thing is, Knightley is "big-boned" according original definition of the word, which is "having a bone structure that is massive in contrast with the surrounding flesh." Her shoulders are broad and her clavicle protruding, but she has little flesh on her bones.

It's gotten to the point where one can't describe any form, male or female, without being accused of body snarking. However, fat prejudice is still insidious and rampant, as a new study in the U.K. shows 46% of people have referred to or thought of an overweight person by by a derogatory name, according to The Independent. Are we being over-sensitive about value-neutral words, or understandably concerned about weight messages sent from celebrities?

Mariska Hargitay's Skewed Self Assessment [Glossed Over]
Georgiana and Her Dull, Dallying Duke [NYT]
Many Britons Fattist Bullies, Survey Shows [Independent]

The Los Angeles Times:

The duke ought to be the villain of this piece, and, in fact, he is, but it is the wonder of Fiennes' performance that it is not only a marvelous portrayal of absolute power in the flesh but also the most sympathetic portrait of a man who, by rights, shouldn't have even the tiniest drop of our regard.

Twice Oscar-nominated (for "Schindler's List" and "The English Patient"), Fiennes works in the subtlest ways, layering in everything from how he carries himself to the way unstated emotions are hinted at by his stone-like face, to present someone who can't help being who he is. Thanks to Fiennes, we come to understand the enigmatic duke as the immovable object deeply perplexed at having to contend with the unstoppable force that is his wife. It is a quietly complex performance almost beyond words, and it overshadows all the gorgeous pictures that are its elegant frame.

Time:

At a certain level, The Duchess is a parable, possibly even a fantasy, about female empowerment.

Fortunately for us, however, it does not linger often or long at that level. As movies like this go — stately homes constantly arustle with the sound of lingerie falling gently to the parquet floors — it is quite a lively, and even occasionally a rather touching, piece.

USA Today:

Though it does have occasional elements of a bodice-ripper romance, the engaging story is distinguished by sharp writing and strong acting. This is a highbrow and elegant chick flick that outstrips the likes of The Women or other insipid movies targeted to females.

The Duchess explores the nature of celebrity and charisma. Most compellingly, it chronicles the saga of a vibrant and forward-thinking woman hampered by the constraints of a rigid society.

Salon:

The raw material here would be a pile of riches for any actress to dig into, and the screenwriters give Knightley plenty to work with. (The script was adapted by Dibb, Anders Thomas Jensen and Jeffrey Hatcher, the last of whom is the screenwriter, and playwright, behind "Stage Beauty," as well as the writer of the underappreciated bonbon "Casanova," starring the late Heath Ledger.) And Knightley doesn't let them down. I've come a long way with Knightley over the years, from finding her almost unbearable to watch (I just couldn't get past the skeletal planes of her face) to falling in love with her circa "Pride and Prejudice." Knightley's performance here veers gracefully from the charming to the devastating: One minute she's giggling as she plays cards with her cherubic little offspring; the next, she's crestfallen when she realizes that her husband is determined to choke off all her life's happiness. (Fiennes' performance here is wholly without vanity: He holds nothing back in playing a loathsome, stubborn character, though he still manages to let glimmers of humanity peek through.) Everything Knightley does rings true and clear — she defines the character of Georgiana in a way that's not anachronistic, nor modern in a forced way, but timeless. That's a lot to ask of a young actress, but Knightley is up to the task. Her Georgiana is history with a human face.

The New York Times:

A big-boned beauty who leads with her jaw, Ms. Knightley looks pretty as a Gainsborough picture in and out of her silks and satins, but she’s not a remotely composed one. Though now 23, she still tends to throw herself around the room like one of those jangling adolescent girls who, arms and legs pinwheeling, heads bobbing like Halloween apples, have yet to adjust to their newly sprouted bodies. (Modigliani would have loved the willowy bend of her neck if he could have persuaded her to stop fidgeting.) She’s not much of an actress — she pops her eyes instead and thrusts out her chest — but she doesn’t need to be Helen Mirren if she can cultivate a real screen presence. Stillness would become her, as would a good director.

NPR:

And when Her Grace undresses — or rather, is undressed by an impatient if only vaguely attentive duke on their wedding night — the director shows us the pinch marks made in Knightley's back by her tight-laced corset.

As many times as I've watched women getting strapped into those things in costume epics, I don't think I've ever seen the pinched flesh. Says worlds, I'd say, about what both the star and the duchess were willing to put up with

The A.V. Club:

To some extent, The Duchess recalls Sofia Coppola's Marie Antoinette, in that it's about bed-hopping and courtly ritual during a time of revolution. Dibb isn't interested in delivering an audience-unfriendly art film, though. His Duchess is thoroughly populist and middlebrow, full of all the high wigs, thick powder, perfect diction, and straightforward dialogue that define bodice-ripping prestige pictures about silently suffering souls. Knightley's brand of muted iconoclasm has always been well-suited to just these kind of coach-and-corset movies, and as a result, the story of her character's fall from idealism to practicality becomes fairly moving. Dibb and company make too much of the parallels between Georgiana's story and that of her most famous descendent, Lady Diana Spencer, but at the same time, the "ironies of fame" material works well—not because of its specific application to the aristocracy, but for how it relates to the commoners. Lots of people dream of better lives for themselves and the citizens of the world. And lots of people stop short when they realize they need to stay home and tuck their kids into bed, so the next generation can have their own unfulfilled dreams someday.

Entertainment Weekly:

But with Knightley in the title role, something interesting happens:
 The star's sporty, modern-girl
 attitude, her Vogue-worthy eyebrows, 
and her athletic build (no matter how impressively those long limbs are encased in complicated gowns of satin and silk) lend an attitude of now-ness to a production that wants to be part historical biopic, part 
 tabloid-relevant. (Director Saul Dibb has a background in documentaries.)

Knightley, now 23, is not a very deep interpreter of her roles (whether in Atonement or the Pirates of the 
 Caribbean trilogy), nor is she as hip as Kirsten Dunst and the rest of the in crowd who cavorted in Sofia Coppola's 
fashion-forward Marie Antoinette with downtown élan. But that hardly matters in The Duchess.

New York:

Every turn is telegraphed, but Fiennes’s duke is a fascinating stiff—uneasy with his privilege but ruthless in using it. Not only is Knightley most excellent, her starved-supermodel look adds an affecting subtext: that the economic impact of male disapproval still inhibits women’s freedom.

Variety:

How Georgiana exploited both her celebrity and her instinctive empathy with commoners to drum up electoral support for her close associate, Lord Charles Fox (an underused Simon McBurney), is dealt with only superficially. Though equally apolitical, Sofia Coppola's "Marie Antoinette" displayed more insight into its subject (an acquaintance of Georgiana's, and arguably the less interesting figure) than "The Duchess" manages with its more straightforward reading of history.

While Knightley ably embodies Georgiana's easy wit, occasional naivete and ahead-of-her-time common sense, her performance is somewhat diminished by its familiarity and the film's reductive view of its protag. And as lovely as the actress is, all that finery can have a smothering effect; she looked more radiant amid the sweat and squalor of Joe Wright's "Pride & Prejudice."

The Hollywood Reporter:

The melodrama is a bit bloodless, though, figuratively and literally. This is a not-uninteresting chapter during an exciting time in British and European politics — neither the American nor French revolutions get mentioned — but writers Dibbs, Jeffrey Hatcher and Anders Thomas Jensen find no way to connect us with these distant personages. Probably the most surprising thing to a modern audience is how aristocrats engage in the most intimate and embarrassing conduct in full view of servants who are treated as little more than furniture.

'The Duchess' opens today in limited release.

• David and Victoria Beckham were in a car crash Friday in France. David was driving his BMW to the Nice airport when he lost control and crashed into a wall. No kids were in the car; Posh was the only passenger. The vehicle had a smashed windshield and damage on the passenger side, but everyone was OK. Bex had to catch his plane (to appear in the Olympic closing ceremonies) so he left poor Vicky with the car… [Perez Hilton]
• Playdate! Kingston Rossdale and the Spears brothers! Britney entertained the three boys while Gwen and Gavin have their hands full with a new baby at home. It says a lot about Brit's progress that people will leave their kids with her, huh? And look, only two nannies in the accompanying picture. [Daily Mail]
• Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie can claim £1,400 a month in child benefits after registering France as their home. Not that they will claim the money. Because they are perfect. [The Sun]
• Lance Bass helped Christina Applegate recover from her double mastectomy. "I was at the hospital holding her hand and getting her through it," he says. "She is a very, very loved person. She's a big crossword puzzle girl. That kept her busy. In her hours of recovery, she's made all these roses out of lace. She has hundreds and hundreds of these amazing different roses. She doesn't know what she's going to do with them." [People]

• Apparently the trailer for Keira Knightley's new film, The Duchess, has shots of Princess Diana intercut in it, with the words "The two were related by ancestry and united by destiny… History repeats itself." Except Keira's flick is about Georgiana, Duchess of Devonshire. Who did not die in a car crash. [Telegraph]
• Madonna and Guy renewed their vows in a private Kabbalah ceremony in London. A-Rod, shmay-rod! [Daily Mail]
• Madonna's Sticky & Sweet tour kicked off over the weekend! [The Sun]
• Madge has $1 million worth of Swarovski crystals on her costumes! [Mirror]
• Her show was "epic" and featured a video appearance by Britney Spears, as well as virtual appearances by Kanye West and Pharrell Williams. [Mirror]
• Madonna's workouts to get in shape for her tour have paid off. Hubby Guy Rithie says: "Her legs are Olympic standard. She is in amazing shape. You won’t find a fitter bird than her. Her legs are so toned. She’s fitter than dancers on her tour who are half her age." [The Sun]
• Madonna's tour includes negative images of destruction: global warming, Hitler, Mugabe and Senator John McCain. Then! Positive images! John Lennon, Al Gore, Mahatma Gandhi and Barack Obama! [AP]
• Um, the McCain camp is not happy about Madonna's tour images. "The comparisons are outrageous, unacceptable and crudely divisive all at the same time." [Yahoo News]
• Is Madonna sparking a stocking trend with her 100 pairs of fishnets? [The Sun]
• Four relatives of Helena Bonham Carter were killed in a minibus crash while of a safari holiday in South Africa last week. [Times of London]
• Amanda Bynes was in a minor car accident Saturday afternoon in L.A. She made an unsafe turn and another car hit her. No serious damage, no drugs or alcohol. [People]
• Jet-setting billionaire Charles Simonyi is engaged to a Swedish woman named Lisa Persdotter, which is weird because Martha Stewart has often referred to him as "my boyfriend." [ONTD]
• Chris Kattan filed for legal separation from his wife, Sunshine Tutt, citing irreconcilable differences.The couple were engaged for 18 months and married for less than 2 months. Sigh, WWMD? (What Would Mango Do?) [Yahoo News via E!]
• John Mayer paparazzi shots aren't worth very much now that he's not with Jennifer Aniston. [MSNBC]
• Barenaked Ladies frontman Ed Robertson and three other people are "very lucky" to have survived a plane crash yesterday. The float-plane went down in the trees in Bancroft, Ontario, Canada. [Toronto Sun]
• Kim Kardashian cut her foot in her hotel room Sunday night. A source says there was so much blood, it looked like a murder scene. She sliced her foot open on a glass coffee table — right before she's supposed to start Dancing With The Stars! [ONTD]
• George Michael's final farewell concert was in London over the weekend. "It's great to be home," he said. (I won't let you down. I will not give you up. Gotta have some faith in the sound… It's the one good thing that I've got.) [Telegraph]
• There was a beachside premiere party for 90210 over the weekend, with Shannen Doherty and Jennie Garth in attendance. [AP]
• Boy jeans: Now seen on Jennifer Aniston. Katie Holmes, what hath thou wrought? [Daily Mail]
• Drew Barrymore: seen singing "I Will Survive" at a karaoke joint in Detroit with Whip It co-stars Juliette Lewis and Ellen Page. It's okay, you'll find better than the Mac dude! [Mirror]
• Sienna Miller and Balthazar Getty went house shopping in Malibu! The "love nest" they checked out was priced at £11million. Guess that's what Getty oil money will get you. [Mirror]
• Snoop Dogg has been granted a visa to perform in Australia, despite his long list of drugs, firearms and weapons charges. You can't hold back the dee oh double gee! [News.com.au]
• Paula Abdul has undergone neck surgery to repair an old cheerleading injury. She's supposedly been in a lot of pain since um, 1987, which maybe made her take pain pills, which maybe made her loopy. [Perez Hilton]
• TV chef Jamie Oliver was talking about free range chickens and gassing chicks when he some kind of Holocaust joke about the Germans, whoops. [The Star]
• Adrian Grenier: Dating an Aussie "weather girl"? [News.com.au]
• Blind item! "Which newly single TV personality tried out his sonorous baritone on young co-eds while vacationing in Mexico? 'He was bouncing between college girls like a pinball,' says our spy. 'His son was there, and it was embarrassing to watch.' Even worse, we hear there were no takers." [Rush & Molloy]
• Mary J. Blige and Robin Thicke will tour together in North America this fall. Will they sing together? A duet could be hot! [Reuters]
• When Alanis Morissette was 15 years old, she opened for Vanilla Ice on tour: "I was instructed not to look him in the eye and that was my first experience of honouring someone’s privacy to the point where you look away when they come near you. I thought, 'Wow, I didn’t think that actually existed!'" [Daily Express]
• Ed McMahon has found someone to buy his home and it's not Donald Trump. [Yahoo News]
• If you like Lil Wayne, Birdman or the Hot Boys, you'll love Cash Money Mobile, the new phone service that delivers ringtones, graphics, videoclips, text alerts and other crap right to your phone. A milli, a milli, a milli. [Reuters]
• Bobby Brown is being sued for failing to pay the legal bills for his divorce from Whitney Houston. He still owes almost $100,000 — can he get if from that country show? [Mirror]
• Tennis star James Blake talks about going to high school with John Mayer: "Just about every day he was at my house, and we'd play Nintendo games… I was about five feet tall wearing a back brace [due to scoliosis]… I don't think either one of us was doing that great [with the ladies] in high school – John was still kind of fitting into a niche ... He's more than made up for himself with how he's done since then." [People]
• Christopher Plummer recalls that hilarious time he thought he had syphilis and William Shatner took his role in Henry V. [Page Six]
• It's been twenty years since N.W.A.'s Straight Outta Compton. Ice Cube says: "It was what we saw all around us in Los Angeles. Gangsta to us didn't have anything to do with Al Capone and stuff like that. It's just about living your life the way you want to live it. And you're not going to let nothing stop you." [USA Today]
• A Serbian village unveiled what it says is Europe's first statue to late Jamaican reggae star Bob Marley on Saturday. Apparently the war-torn region prefers role models of peace. [Yahoo News]
• There's an excerpt from Faith Evans' book, and it details the night when she caught Lil' Kim in Biggie's bed. "As soon as I saw a small lump next to Big’s large frame, I flew into a rage, ran over to the side of the bed, and pulled back the covers. I grabbed some chick our of the bed and started beating her ass. At some point, the chick’s wig came off in my hand; It was a short, cropped wig. I stopped throwing punches for a minute to get a good look at the chick I was beating up. It was Lil Kim. She was completely butt-naked, yelling as I pushed her around the room…" [The.Life Files, Gawker]
• "Growing up, there’s a lot of pressure on young women, when you first become aware of your own looks in relation to other women’s looks. You just want to be cookie-cutter beautiful. And sometimes you think, 'Maybe I could change something about myself to fit that mould.' I’m no exception to that. When I was growing up I wanted a nose job because I didn’t think my nose was good. Your face needs to have character if you’re going to be an actor or you’re just kind of a face. You’re not really a person or a personality." — Anne Hathaway. [Daily Express]
• "Making clothes together in our studio makes us feel complete. We probably sound like a group of grannies in a knitting circle but it's the truth and it gives us some control over our visual identity." — Coldplay's Chris Martin. [Mirror]
• "I wrote that song as a stalker. It was raining, and I was sitting there in front of the house, watching her come home from a date after we were divorced. I was imagining what she did on this date, and watching her giving him a kiss. I went home and wrote this song." — Terrence Howard, on the "No. 1 Fan" from his new album. [E!]