More To Love, which premieres tonight at 9 p.m./8 Central, was created by Mike Fleiss, the producer behind many of the most popular dating reality shows including The Bachelor, The Bachelorette, The Cougar, and Who Wants To Marry A Multimillionaire. The new show doesn't deviate much from his usual formula, except that this time all the contestants are between 180 and 280 pounds and bachelor Luke Conley, a 330-pound, 26-year-old real estate investor, gives each of the women a diamond promise ring (symbolizing his vow to get to know them) at the beginning of the show that they must return when they're eliminated.

As we've already mentioned there are pros and cons to More To Love. Some critics say it's the most authentic of the Bachelor-type shows because the contestants are actually there to find love (the reasoning being, heavier women obviously can't find love under normal circumstances, and they're too unattractive to be trying to launch a reality TV career). This, of course, leads to tears, which makes the women more relatable to some reviewers, while others find them too pathetic to watch. One critic even complains that many of the women seem ashamed and don't love their bodies, which isn't so shocking considering that people they've never met are writing headlines today with puns about their weight and considering whether they are too fat for love. Below, we check out (but certainly don't weigh) what the critics are saying about More To Love:

The Los Angeles Times

That the series has been made at all testifies to the fact that most dating shows — most TV shows — feature people who fit the latest definition of hotness. We may praise the inner person, but we are nevertheless continually encouraged (and perhaps wired) to worship the conventionally attractive surface. Not that these people aren't pretty. They may be larger than most, but they are young and shiny and dressed to the nines. (And there is nothing homogeneous about them; they come in a variety of shapes and styles.) Conley, who also wears his bulk well, seems like a nice guy, but he is also a bit of a kid in a candy store, finagling kisses right and left. And though he claims to have "no type," it probably isn't fair to say that looks won't matter at all to him. That is just how humans are.

The Washington Post

Obviously, the ingredients are here for another of TV's nasty ridicule shows, and those of a mind to hoot and holler at the contestants will do so no matter how much alleged dignity the producers pump into the proceedings. But there's also plenty of grist here for those who are genuinely sensitive to the plentiful problems of the porker, whether one is intimately acquainted with the syndrome or just observes it from relatively afar.
...Perhaps partly because the producers are determined not to let More to Love turn into a jeer fest, the show almost chokes on its own sensitivity and refinement. One woman does take an impromptu leap into a swimming pool, and a few others come across as engagingly playful and bouncy. But for the most part, a tasteful torpor prevails.

For his part, Conley parcels out cliches at such a rate you begin to suspect he's watched nothing but reality shows for 10 years or so. "I'm just an average guy . . . ready to meet the girl of my dreams," he says sportingly, at least twice. At the farewell ceremony — five women have to depart at the end of the premiere — Conley tells the competitors: "You all look beautiful tonight. . . . I just want to thank you from the bottom of my heart." He's so sappily bland and eager to appeal that he could make a pretty good game-show host himself. When he declares that he's "the luckiest man alive" because he's been "given the opportunity of a lifetime," you don't have to be a cynic or party pooper to feel like shouting, "Will you please shut up, you big, fat ham?!?"

Variety

As the direct-to-camera confessionals begin, though, the waterworks freely open, with the women shedding plenty of tears as they discuss their dating histories and, in some instances, despair at the prospect of ever meeting anyone. One girl talks about how she's "never had a second date." Another wonders why guys "love the skinny bitches" — you know, the ones that populate every other dating show. Because the women appear more vulnerable, the program feels more emotional, even if there isn't a single original note otherwise, from the mansion setting to the protracted elimination ceremony. Frankly, the only conspicuous difference is that they squeezed fewer would-be Mrs. Conleys into each limo. Nevertheless, these women aren't looking for steady gigs on MTV, and they cry at the drop of a hat. That somehow makes them more real, however contrived the situation might be.

The Hollywood Reporter

All of this could have gone tacky in the wrong hands, and to Fleiss and his experienced gang's credit, it doesn't. Instead, More is half-reality-hookup show, half-Oprahesque tearfest. Only a true sociopath wouldn't empathize with women who say that they've never been in love, never had a second date and have all but given up expecting anything from men. This is a show with at least 25% more tears, 50% more hugging and 100% more long, flowing hair than any other, and it's moving.

The Boston Herald

The 20 women competing for a chance to marry him include a nanny, a motivational speaker and a rocket scientist. All are overweight, but none are Ruby-esque. Many are gorgeous. Many view Luke as their last chance at romance. Sure, a few offer signs of bravado. Kristian gestures to her posterior. "My junk in my trunk - I've got a lot of it and I love it." More typical is Christina, who wipes tears in her on-camera introduction, saying, "I need to see love is possible." It's a painful confession that is repeated all too often throughout the premiere. Despite their personalities, their education and accomplishments, many of these women have never been on a date. They're so desperate they've signed up for a franchise famous for putting women in a harem and then evicting them on commercial television.

Newsday

Honestly, the only controversy here is the controversy of ripping oneself off. Why haven't the legal beagles from Disney issued a cease-and-desist order? This show isn't like The Bachelor. This show is The Bachelor. (Its producer is Mike Fleiss, who also does The Bachelor/Bachelorette.) But here's the kicker: It's better than The Bachelor. There's an added dimension of reality and of simple, relatable human emotion. In a way, this is The Bachelor for the rest of us. The downside is that the rejection element on The Bachelor is ho-hum. Those babes will get instant dates when they leave the cellophane-wrapped mansion. On More to Love, it's a little cruel. These babes might not.

The New York Daily News

To give everybody involved the benefit of the doubt, perhaps the new dating reality show More to Love was designed in part to help humanize plus-size women. Mission unaccomplished... [Conley] says he likes large women, with curves, meat on their bones and all that. The problem comes when we meet the women and discover that many of them do not. Contestant after contestant confesses, in the introductory moment, that they don't like being big. They not only don't like being big, they hate that they have tried to be thin and failed. Gradually, it becomes unavoidable to conclude that for many of the participants here, signing up for this show and this kind of national exposure was motivated by a not-very-thinly-disguised sense of desperation... But their collective unhappiness and frustration remains a bad thing for the viewer because there's no pleasure in watching any show where the leading emotion is sadness.

Newsweek

But just when you're expecting a dignified show about big women who aren't ashamed of it, the show whiplashes you into something totally different. One at a time the women confess, most tearfully, that their size has hampered, if not totally derailed their lovelives. Some say they have never been on a date, or in a relationship, most say they are passed over for their svelte girlfriends. Even more than while watching The Bachelor, the stench of desperation wafts right through the screen. These women are utterly convinced that a reality show is their last, best hope for finding a relationship. Obviously it's not that serious. Big folks get married all the time, and the slender women on The Bachelorcan be just as despondent. But here, being overweight is shown as the ultimate hurdle to romance.

Still, depending on your perspective on the matter, More to Love represents progress. Unlike The Biggest Loser, Dance Your Ass Off and Ruby, More to Love is a show about overweight people that doesn't relentlessly focus on their efforts to lose the weight. On the one hand, it's nice to see television shows that don't use fat people as the butt of jokes, or offer to put them on television so long as they're efforting to "normalize" themselves through extreme diet and exercise. But at the same time, television is becoming representative of the larger, totally confusing debate about body weight... Depending on which of these shows you watch, obesity is either the public health issue of our lifetime, or a totally valid lifestyle choice.

Salon

Fox's new reality show More to Love might as well be called The Fatchelor: It's an excruciatingly typical dating competition with the single twist that both the catch of the day and the women competing for his attention are all larger than average. With weight as the show's central focus, the editing plays to as many fat stereotypes as possible: In the first episode, which airs Tuesday night, we get women weeping about their dateless pasts, one unironic use of the phrase "big-boned," a debate on the merits of Spanx and, of course, umpteen conversations about food — one of which includes the fatchelor flirtatiously declaring, "I like anything thick and juicy." (And cheesy, apparently.) The show's marketing and promotion campaigns claim a message of empowerment, but for the larger romantics among us, More to Love does little to dispel the myth that fat people's lives are built around dessert and desperation.

Earlier: More To Love: The Pros & Cons

• Chris Brown's management is reportedly working feverishly on ''Project Mea Culpa.'' Sources say he and Rihanna will co-author a book about abuse and go on talk shows.

• "The only way Chris can possibly reverse things is to come clean and help raise awareness about abusive relationships,'' said a source close to his legal team, who added that part of the deal is that he'll pay Rihanna as much as $10 million ''if he as much as squeezes her arm the wrong way." [Chicago Sun-Times]
• A L.A. judge filed a protective order against Chris Brown yesterday and TMZ has a copy. It allows Rihanna to record her phone conversations with Chris. Also, he must not "harass, strike, threaten, assault (sexually or otherwise), follow, stalk, molest, destroy or damage personal or real property, disturb the peace, keep under surveillance, or block movements of" Rihanna.[TMZ]
• Rihanna's lawyer says she'll testify against Chris Brown if she's required to, but didn't say how Rihanna wants the case to turn out. "The fact is, Rihanna desires that it be quick and expeditious," said her lawyer. "She wants to get back to her life and her career." [Us]
• Chris Brown was at the SLS Hotel in Beverly Hills last night but he wasn't partying. He was there for a dinner business meeting with a man who works in the music industry and didn't drink. [TMZ]
• Blogger Ben Barna claimed that singer Nikki Jean was the woman who sent Chris text messages that ignited his assault, but she sent him a Facebook message saying she hasn't seen or spoken to Rihanna or Chris in six months. Barna apologized. [Black Book]
• More than 1,100 pages of documents have been released in the Caylee Anthony case including images from her mother's computer. Casey Anthony had saved on the computer pictures of skulls and a drawing of two skeletons locked in an embrace and a photo of Caylee with a heart-shaped sticker similar to the one found on her body. [People]
• Kristen Stewart has been criticized for not attending the Oscars to support Twilight co-star Robert Pattinson, but she has a good reason: She wasn't invited. "If I was invited to the Oscars, I would be there in a nanosecond," she says. "If I got an invitation to the Oscars, I wouldn't turn it down!" [E!]
• Lauren Conrad says she's leaving The Hills because she's tired of leading a double life. "You see us on the show and we appear to have seminormal lives, but if you watch any entertainment news show, half of the cast is being swarmed by paparazzi," says Lauren. "I'm excited to go back to having just one life, because there were times that I got them confused." [Us]
• As Pamela Anderson was modeling a Vivienne Westwood gown on the runway with the designer, her top popped open exposing her breast. Yeah, there are pictures. [The Sun]
• Zac Efron's mom talked to him about why he and girlfriend Vanessa Hudgens were photographed looking at sex toys. "My stocking was full of condoms this Christmas," he says. "She buys me the economy box." [People]
• Sienna Miller was kicked in the face by a horse as a child. She pointed out the scar to Jay Leno last night, but frankly, we can't see it. [The Daily Mail]
• Charles Barkley's jail time for driving drunk has been reduced from five days to three for reasons unknown. [TMZ]
• Charlize Theron's former dance teacher called in to a British talk show and revealed the South African's childhood secrets. "She always had these entrepreneurial skills and she used to buy sweets from the school tuck shop and sell them at night to hungry children for a profit. We thought it was wonderful - we, her teachers, thought that showed gumption," said the teacher. "Oh my god, Bernice! This in insane!" said Theron. "I don't remember selling candy at a profit! I did start drinking at a very early age, so my memory is a bit dodgy." [The Daily Express]
• The Daily Beast dug up a 2007 ABC interview with Robin Givens, who spent years in an abusive relationship with Mike Tyson, for insight into the Chris/Rihanna situation. She said: "With Michael, I felt like I had a purpose. I really felt like I had to protect him and love him and convince him that the world can be an okay place - I wanted to love all of his hurts and all of his pain away." [The Daily Beast]
• Coolio has been arrested at LAX for crack possession. [TMZ]
• Amy Winehouse is trying to pass her road test so she can drive a cute vintage car. "Amy's looking for things to do to keep her away from the temptation of drink and drugs," says a friend. [The Sun]
• Dame Judi Dench, Dame Helen Mirren, and "honorary Brit" Gillian Anderson are included on a list of the 20 most powerful women in British theater. [The Telegraph]
• There are rumors of a Broadway production of Sex and the City but Cynthia Nixon says that it's not going to happen because the excitement of seeing the cast on stage would be too much for fans. "It would be really hard for people to even see just two of us together on a stage. That would be way too distracting!" [The Daily Express]
• Denise Richards says this isn't the first time she's been asked to be on Dancing With The Stars. "When they asked me to do it originally, my mom was still [alive] and both my parents were like, 'You're going to get voted off right away because women hate you,' " says Richards, "And I thought, 'They're right. This may not be a good time to do the show.' Granted, a lot of them still hate me, but hopefully they hate me less. Time has gone by." [E!]
• Devo will perform their 1978 album "Are We Not Men?" in full for the first time at a concert in London in May. [Yahoo]
• Krist Novoselic says there are no more unreleased Nirvana songs. "What there is, is video," Novoselic. "There's a lot of video. There's not going to be any new Nirvana records." [AP]
• "I do feel in my twenties I did way too much... I didn't realise I could say 'no'. It was like someone shot a gun and I just kept running and running... until I completely lost the desire to work. I felt like I had nothing to say. Then a lot of things happened in my life. My father died. I met my husband. I had a baby. And I thought, 'There's actually a real life to be had here that has nothing to do with Hollywood and all of these people and all of this negativity.'" - Gwyneth Paltrow. [The Independent]
• The Bachelor, Jason Mesnick appeared on Ellen today as part of his apology tour for switching fiances on the show. He said: "I think what I want to do is to apologize to everybody out there. All the fans of the show because thank you for watching, but this was my real life and it was the hardest thing I had to do. And I made some big mistakes and that's what I wanted to sit here and talk about today-the mistakes that I made. But in the end I found my true love." [Yahoo]

• Nancy Pelosi left a health-care forum at the White House to meet with Brad Pitt. This piece calls them "Brancy." [WaPo]

• Everybody on Capitol Hill was atwitter over Brad Pitt being in their midst; Rep. James E. Clyburn says: "I did not realize when the Speaker asked me to chair the Katrina/Rita task force that it would lead to my getting in a position to make my grandchildren so envious of me, because this effort brought the two of us — Brad Pitt and myself together." [Politico]
• This headline sums it up: "Capitol Hill Goes Gaga Over Brad Pitt." [USA Today]
• Back in September, Amy Winehouse was involved in some kind of "incident" (uh, which one?) and now she has been charged with assault. Run back to St. Lucia! [People]
• Oh yeah: It was when she punched a fan who asked for a picture. [The Sun, Daily Mail]
• Um, Amy's husband Blake Fielder-Civil is "besotted" with Francesca Morralee, who is 17. [The Sun]
• Chris Brown appeared in court yesterday but did not enter a plea. His arraignment was delayed until April 6. [People]
  
• Here's a picture of two "fans" outside Chris Brown's court hearing yesterday, with signs which read "I love you Chris." [Concrete Loop]
• After Chris Brown was charged with two felonies, one of Rihanna's relatives told People: "It's about time." [People]
• Rihanna's lawyer told Chris Brown: "I think Rihanna would like this over as quickly as possible. It benefits everybody." Then Brown's own lawyer told Brown: "I've explained it to you that the best thing that could happen in this case is, Don [Rihanna's lawyer] is involved. Didn't I tell you that?" [LA Times]
• Nine days passed before Chris Brown apologized to Rihanna for beating her. [Fox 411]
• The reason Usher backed down on his criticism of Chris Brown? Rihanna. Trying to show support for Rihanna. [MSNBC]
• Chris Brown "hit the town" after his court appearance. Not really… He hung out at a hotel bar with bodyguards. [TMZ]
• What the goop was Gwyneth Paltrow doing getting into a chauffeur-driven car with Christiane Amanpour? [Page Six]
• Jewel and Nancy O'Dell have both withdrawn from Dancing With The Stars due to injuries suffered during rehearsals. What the hell goes on at that show? [People]
• Girls Next Door star Holly Madison will replace Jewel and Nancy. [NY Daily News]
• It may have sounded like there were screaming masses at Michael Jackson's press conference, but there were only 25 people including press. [Gatecrasher]
• But! People trying to get "pre-sale" tickets for Jackson's show are complaining that the website is effed. [Telegraph]
• Even though Heath Ledger's dad told a reporter that the family planned to keep Heath's Oscar "forever," it will actually go to Michelle Williams. Today. She will hold it for Matilda. [LA Times]
• WTF. This report begins, "Madonna has offered a gnarly old hand to Sienna Miller…" [Daily Star]
• Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony were "in tears" watching American Idol finalist Jorge Nuñez. [E!]
• "Regis Philbin Blackmail Shocker!" [National Enquirer]
• David Beckham will stay with AC Milan until the end of the season and will return next season, but he'll be "timeshared" with the LA Galaxy between July and October. [Daily Mail]
• "Flip-flopping" Bachelor Jason Mesnick swears he is not a jerk. [MSNBC]
• Shh! Don't tell anyone, but Lucy Liu is an artist, painting under the pseudonym Yu Ling. Snap up her portrait of two people kissing for a mere $28,000. [Page Six]
• It's all baby-talk all the time on the set of Ugly Betty. [People]
• For an episode of Oprah's show, Dennis Quaid and his wife returned to the hospital where their twins were given an overdose of blood thinner. [AP]
• Vince Vaughn is engaged and the lady is named Kyla Weber; she's a Canadian real estate agent. [Gatecrasher]
• Simon Cowell and ex Terri Seymour went on a dinner date. Cue the "ooooohhhh!" [Daily Mail]
• Gossip Girl's Matthew Settle and his wife welcomed a daughter, Aven Angelica, yesterday. [People]
• "LSD, Easter Island, science fiction and, of course, Lorne Michaels, all played a role in developing the Coneheads sketch for Saturday Night Live. [Page Six]
• Joe Francis denies he accidentally bumped into Brody Jenner's girlfriend at a club, which sparked a screaming match. Joe, ever the pacifist, says: "There was no physical contact, but if you're Brody Jenner and dating an ugly piece of trash…you should expect these types of altercations." [Page Six]
• Ghostface has written a song for Rihanna. Sample lyrics: "Shake it off, wake up… Pretty lady, come about yourself…" [Concrete Loop]
• Fantasia Barrino returns to the musical The Color Purple for a five week stint in Washington DC. [Variety]
• Mark Wahlberg will star in a "dark thriller" which this piece calls "one of the hottest scripts in town." It's set in Boston, so Wahlberg can do his best "Say hello to your mother for me." [The Hollywood Reporter]
• DNA tests prove that Jerry Lewis has a daughter — he mother had an affair with the entertainer back in 1952. He has not publicly acknowledged the woman as his daughter, but his son agreed to a DNA test because "everybody deserves to know where they came from and who they are." [UPI]
• Blind item: "Which flowery former wild child had a bad sexual experience with the creator of a hit TV show - but went for another round because 'she'll try anything twice'?" [Gatecrasher]
• R.I.P. Sydney Chaplin, Charlie Chaplin's son and Tony-award winning actor. [AP]
• "My dad is more of a rock star than me. He embraces the lifestyle. People think having your dad on tour would cramp your style. But I don't have any style - he's got all the right moves. He's living the dream. I am going to check he hasn't trashed the hotel room before we leave each city." — Chris Martin. [The Sun]
• "The biggest thing for me is that I am now going to have to choose between work - this script or that script. Until now, my roles have chosen me; my career has been shaped essentially by never saying no. But now I will have to say no. I just hope l'll be wise in my choosing." — Melissa Leo, about her life post-Oscar nomination. [Guardian]
• "So when I do go out with him I sit and get progressively more pissed, and he's one of those annoying people who remembers everything. I go to him, 'Just have a fucking beer! One beer!' And he says to me that if he has one beer he'll probably end up in a crack house in Kings Cross within 40 minutes. I'm like, ‘Brilliant, I'll come with you.'" — Noel Gallagher, on hanging out with Russell Brand, who does not drink. [The Sun]
• "It's fine if Tori wants her own reality show or wants to write books about her childhood. I just wish she'd leave me out of it. She has plenty to talk about without saying things like, 'I wish I were closer to my mother,' or 'Did you see what my mother wrote on her Web site?' I wish she would call me, rather than say on television, 'I should call my mom.'" — Candy Spelling, whose autobiography, Stories From Candy-Land, is out at the end of the month. [Gatecrasher]
• "Dave [Stewart] and I talk to each other only rarely these days, and I can't see another reunion. He lives in America and I'm over here. We're both working on our own things. For me, it would feel like a step backwards and I want to keep moving forward. I enjoy multi-tasking, so I want to do a lot of different things. I want to keep all the plates spinning." — Annie Lennox. [Daily Mail]
• "I am in perfect health. I'm in very good shape and feeling very good." — Hugh Hefner, knocking down reports that her was "far from his normally alert self" at a recent party. [Yahoo News via E!]
• "It doesn't vacuum, it doesn't wash the dishes or stuff like that." — Charlize Theron, joking about her Oscar. [The Star]
• "I'd love to work with Amy Winehouse. She has a very distinct, sexy, soulful voice and she writes great lyrics." — John Legend. [Mirror]
• "[The role reminds me of ] a period of my life where I had to work several jobs to pay my bills. Something would go wrong and you'd have to take another job to get your car running. That was very real for me." — Amy Adams, on Sunshine Cleaning. [WSJ]

• Elizabeth Taylor, who is Jewish, donated $100,000 to the Alliance for Christian Education. She says she gave to the charity "because our new president challenged us to break down barriers that divide us." [AP]

• Holly Madison is joining the cast of Dancing With the Stars. She may be replacing Jewel, who has a knee injury. [Us]
• Holly also says of her newly single status: "I'm never dating anybody again. I don't need a man. I'm really happy with myself and being with my friends." [People]
• The new issue of People features a Rihanna Cover Girl ad that seems a bit insensitive. The text says "light up your eyes." [Guanabee]
• Arnold Schwarzenegger has returned to Austria, but just for a visit. He's going to his mother's grave and meeting with friends. [Yahoo]
• Phish will reunite for the first time since 2004 on Friday, but first the band is asking a judge to block the sale of bootleg T-shirts, posters and other merchandise at their upcoming concerts. [AP]
• French first lady Carla Bruni, who is 41, says she would like to have another child, "but I don't know if it will be possible at my age," she said. "If it's not possible biologically, I will adopt one. I'm not obsessed by blood ties. I think you can form strong bonds without that." [Yahoo]
• Which feature of Brad and Angie's new Long Island home is the weirdest? Two helipads, a barbershop, or a fallout shelter? [NY Magazine]
• A 22-year-old man has been found guilty of fatally stabbing Rob Knox, 18, who played Marcus Belby in Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, outside a bar last spring. [The Guardian]
• George Clooney wrote a column today for The Daily Beast saying the world should bring Sudan's president to justice for his crimes against humanity. [The Daily Beast]
• In this interview Bryan Cranston, the dad from Malcolm in the Middle talks about playing a terminally ill chemistry teacher who cooks meth to leave some cash behind for his pregnant wife and child on AMC's Breaking Bad. [Esquire]
• Former Spice Girl Mel B says: "I've never met anybody with a higher sex drive than me ever in my entire life." [The Sun]
• Amy Winehouse's ex, Blake [Formerly] Incarcerated may be headed back to jail soon. He is reportedly dating a 16-year-old girl. [Newser]
• Mariska Hargitay was taken to the hospital last night with chest pains. She was hospitalized twice before in recent months for a collapsed lung. [TMZ]
• Are Megan Fox and Brian Austin Green actually broken up? She slept over at their home last week even though she'd checked into a hotel and the two went shopping together. [E!]
• More than 50 photos of the Beatles and the Rolling Stones hanging out during the years 1964-66 were found recently in the duffel bag of the bands' former tour manager. They are on display in a New York gallery. [The Telegraph]
• Emma Watson has not accepted a spot at Yale. She says on her official site that she does not have a Twitter page and is still deciding whether to attend school in the US or the UK. Also, Michelle Fairley has been cast as Hermione's mother in the final Harry Potter film. [ONTD]
• Amanda Seyfried will star in a film adaptation of the book Sucker Punch. Her character's stepfather sends her to a mental institution to be lobotomized. While there, she imagines a fantasy world author Zack Snyder describes as "Alice in Wonderland with machine guns." [Entertainment Weekly]
• Miley Cyrus, 16, says she's releasing her autobiography so fans realize, "that I'm a real person just like them." She adds: "Most of the time you see me smiling – I mean that's how I got my name! – but that's not what it's all about. Everyone goes through hardships and heartbreaks." So expect some Nick Jonas chatter. [People]
• Chris Harrison, host of The Bachelor says that Jason Mesnick should have stuck with Melissa Mesnick, the first girl he proposed to, rather than switching to runner up Melissa Rycroft. He added, "When the rumors went from how this ends to this is completely contrived and scripted, questioning not only the show's integrity but my integrity and honesty that's where I got a little upset." [People]
• The drama will continue next season on The Bachelorette with Jillian Harris, one of the last three women Jason rejected. [People]
• On part two of The Bachelor: After the Final Rose, which was filmed six weeks after Jason dumped Melissa, Jason and Molly appeared together on the show and were constantly kissing and nuzzling. He says of dumping Melissa: "It was nothing I planned on. It was not the classiest thing in the world, but I had to follow my heart. I don't regret where I'm at; I'm really happy. Everybody is entitled to feel however they want but that's what was going on with me. I don't feel like my feelings were wrong either." [People]

• People are freaking out because, in new pictures of Miley Cyrus jogging with her boyfriend, you can see her cleavage. She says: "I guess it's just... I'm not allowed to jog any more." Apparently not!

• Miley explains that she was hanging out with her sister before jogging, wearing her mom's loose shirt over her bathing suit. "As I'm running, it got a little bit lower and you could see a little of the bathing suit top," said Miley. "So, oh my goodness, Miley Cyrus wears a two-piece! Kill me! I'm wearing a two-piece ... with an 8-year old." You can check out the photo in question at the link. [Us]
• Apparently, raising eight kids may not be as tough as it seems. Jon of Jon and Kate Plus 8 was allegedly out partying and drinking with students at Juniata College last month. One woman says: "He was acting like a drunk, girl-chasing frat boy. It really disturbed me. On the show he is so nice, but here, he was acting like an idiot." The next night, he was reportedly at it again. A witness says: "He was dirty dancing with several girls from the volleyball team, making out, kissing them on their necks and mouths." [Star]
• The police are still investigating Chris Brown. The L.A. County D.A. has not received the case from the L.A.P.D. yet - will he still be arraigned on Thursday? [TMZ]
• Chris Brown was nice to Suge Knight's 14-year-old daughter once, so now Suge (who has also been accused of domestic violence) says in this video, "I'll ride with Chris Brown 1,000%." [TMZ]
• Usher said after seeing a recent picture of Chris Brown jet skiing in Miami, "I'm a little disappointed in this photo … After the other photo [of Rihanna's bruised face]? C'mon, Chris. Have a little bit of remorse, man. The man's on jet skis? Like, just relaxing in Miami?" [The Life Files]
• Nadya Suleman was investigated by the L.A. County Department of Children and Family Services even before she had the octuplets. In fact, the police have been called to her house eight times. [TMZ]
• Suleman was spotted leaving Dr. Phil's office with her lawyer. It's unclear if she was there for a taping or a private meeting. [E!]
• Jaime Spears said in court that he spends 60-70 hours a week taking care of all things Britney, and that's why the court is paying him $16,000 per month. [TMZ]
• Michael Jackson is expected to announce in London this week that he'll be holding a series of comeback concerts in the city. Isn't he supposed to be gravely ill? [Yahoo]
• A woman is suing Paula Abdul because she fell on her property during a taping of her reality show Hey Paula. Insert your own Paula falling down joke here. [TMZ]
• Cate Blanchett will star as Blanche DuBois in a revival of A Streetcar Named Desire at the Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts in D.C. [NY Times]
• Dancing With the Stars contestant Lil Kim says she and her fellow inmates used to watch the show in jail. "Me and my girls used to watch it and they would say, ‘You need to be on that show,'" says Kim. [People]
• Oprah and Larry King are both bidding to interview Jade Goody, the British reality TV star who has cancer, via satellite. Jade says: "This illness has made me famous all over the world." [The Mirror]
• Oprah has adopted a puppy. The dog is an 8-week-old blond cocker spaniel. Staff at the PAWS Chicago shelter say they named her Amanda, but don't know if Oprah has picked a new name. [Us]
• Mark Ronson jokingly offered Lily Allen anything she wanted when she agreed to join him onstage at the Glastonbury music festival last year. Lily sent him the $10,000 bill for a helicopter to the event. He says: "She completely took me seriously! And what was I going to say at that point? I had to fucking pay for it. She got the helicopter." [Showbiz Spy]
• According to a new poll, men would most like to party with Megan Fox, and their second choice is Tina Fey. This is probably the only time you'll see their names together in one sentence. [People]
• Liverpool Hope University is now offering a Master of Arts degree in The Beatles. "There have been over 8,000 books about The Beatles but there has never been serious academic study and that is what we are going to address," said a lecturer in the program. [Reuters]
• America's Next Top Model is back this week and Tyra says this group of models is "very special" because it includes a contestant with scars on her body, one with startlingly large eyes, and a street preacher. [AP]
• Comedy Central wasn't sure that it could afford to keep The Sarah Silverman Program but they have worked out a way to bring it back for a third season, by sharing it with Logo. [The Hollywood Reporter]
• Matt Damon is visiting refugee centers on the South African border with Zimbabwe as part of his work with the human rights organization he started with other celebrities. [Yahoo]
• Scarlett Johansson has brown hair now, but says: "For a long time I've had really white-blonde hair. I'm naturally blonde – my dad's Danish – and I was playing up to it. I wanted to act out all those famous blonde icons – Lauren Bacall, Grace Kelly, Marilyn Monroe ...Ever since I started on the red carpet, my idea of glamour was the Golden Age of Hollywood. I like to be feminine. Give the people what they want. The hair, the make-up, the gown, the diamonds. That, to me, is glamour." [The Telegraph]
• Rainn Wilson, one of the guys honored at Cosmo's Fun Fearless Men Awards last night, says: "I have no qualms about making myself look idiotic and I think that is a rarity in Hollywood ... I don't mind looking like a big, weird doofus, because that's what I am. I embrace my inner doofus." Chace Crawford, Aaron Eckhart, Michael C. Hall, Joshua Jackson, and Timbaland also received awards. [USA Today]
• Victoria's Secret model Selita Ebanks shared her thoughts on what she looks for in a man, saying, "I'm a big sports fan, and nothing is more unattractive to me than a guy who doesn't appreciate ESPN ... If I have to explain football or basketball, that's the biggest turn-off." She adds: "Aggression doesn't belong in the home. And if he gets too excited by gore or violence on television, I'm out of there." [People]
• Trista Sutter, one of the only people to find love on the Bachelor/Bachelorette shows, says Bachelor Jason Mesnick "doesn't deserve to walk away scot-free" after breaking off his engagement with one woman, only to turn around to propose to another. She says: "What disappointed me as a mom is that he introduced both girls to Ty (Jason's son). Melissa was around, and now she's gone. What is Ty going to think?" [E!]

So, The Guardian asks, is it apropos to Google someone before a date? One the one hand:

Leaving aside the force of raw curiosity, you might actually uncover something you urgently need to know. Like the woman in New York in 2004 who Googled her date and found an FBI warrant for his arrest. He'd been on the run for a year after allegedly stealing around $100,000. She didn't turn up for dinner that Friday; the Feds agreed to stand in.

Okay, but FBI warrants aside - and why, by the way, was this cat asking her out under his real name? Add "inept" to the list - the cons are pretty obvious. The piece idenitifies the potential awkwardness of being "in a difficult situation where you know something you shouldn't and then have to feign ignorance when it is mentioned:

If you've already discovered that he or she once won a Bafta, or spent three years learning throat-singing in Mongolia, you will find yourself steering conversation in that direction. Things become stilted; the spirit of mutual discovery isn't quite what it ought to be. Not only that, you run the risk of forgetting what you've been told and what you're not meant to know yet. You ask him how his pet bunny is and he peers at you oddly.

Sure, that sounds crap, and unless you're a nutjob like, say, Shannon on The Bachelor, to be avoided. (Also, you'll find you have Facebook friends in common, which is disconcerting.) But seriously, this is the only reason to avoid obtaining information which, as the piece points out, "could once only have come from a private detective?" It's not merely that it strips spontanaiety from the date, but, in my experience, it makes you feel creepy. We all have friends who have dived into quite unembarrassed orgies of online reconnaissance, and it doesn't exactly project self-assurance. But the bigger issue is karmic: who wants someone looking you up, judging you as the sum of a name on a college club list you only signed up for to be polite; a high school paper article; a picture of you with, let's say Mr. Met with a creepy stranger, maybe on a very humid hair-day, in a pair of jeans you got on super-sale. It is this, more than anything, that's stayed my hand (until, say, the third date.) Because, at the end of the day, an impressionistic Google portrait is, pretty much, worse than nothing.
Should you Google your date? [The Guardian]

Star
Jamie Lynn's "baby joy turns to tears…" because her shotgun wedding to Casey Aldridge is allegedly off! Despite frequent, happy looking trips to Wal-Mart, the two teens fight all the time. Even worse, Casey is reportedly two-timing Jamie Lynn! "Casey is acting like a dog," a local yokel notes. And Casey's not the only "celebrity" behaving badly. The Hills Whitney Port is acting like a diva, showing up late to appearances and demanding trips to 7-Eleven. Even more shocking: a Whitney Port personal appearance commands $14,000. New moms Melissa Joan Hart and Jaime Pressly are gabbing about their new baby boys. Jaime ate cabbage soup six days a week and worked out two hours a day to lose her baby weight. Sounds…farty and ill-advised. Lilo hates Mary-Kate Olsen because of her friendship with Samantha Ronson, although MK is really scared of people thinking she's a lezebel. John Mayer has a touch of the OCD: since moving in with Jennifer Aniston at her hotel in Florida while she shoots Marley and Me, he has been cleaning up after her cleaning lady. Jen, who is 9 years older than John, is also featured in a spread called "Cougar Season" alongside Mariah, Ellen DeGeneres, and ur-Cougar Demi Moore. Ladies sometimes date younger men: this is not news. We are officially over the term "cougar."
Grade: D (falling asleep outside and having someone write "Dick" on your stomach in sunblock)
Us
Former jilted Bachelor star Andrew Firestone has a "Second Chance At Love," the Us cover blares. Even though ex-fiancée Jen Schefft dumped him on his keister after the show aired, Firestone has found love with a leggy blonde Serbian model named Ivana Bozilovic. You guys, it's so hard to rebound from a break-up when you're a ridiculously good-looking heir to a tire fortune. Firestone has been through so much! Not as much as breakup postergirl Jennifer Aniston. But things seem to be looking up for our formerly depressed diva! Her friends all love new boyfriend John Mayer, even notoriously tough Courteney Cox. Several preggers stars are just about ready to "pop": Gwen Stefani, Nicole Kidman, Jamie Lynn Spears, Luciana Damon (Matt's wife) and Ryan Shawhughes (Ethan Hawke's gf) are among the super pregs. Patrick Swayze has gone back to work on the forthcoming A&E series The Beast even though he was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. No cancer puts Patrick in a corner! Kim Cattrall signed on to executive produce and star in a new HBO comedy, Sensitive Skin, which is about a woman rediscovering her sexuality. "Even though it's my name, and the word skin is there, it's a very subtle show," she assures Us. Mmmkay.
Grade: D- (subway smells on a 99 degree day)
In Touch
Angelina is "Pushing Brad Away!" Nooooes! Apparently Ange has violent mood swings because of all the pregnancy hormones and Brad can't deal with it. He took Maddox to the MotoGP motorcycling championship just to get the eff away from Angie. At least she's not back to her Billy Bob humping days, but allegedly Nicole Richie is back to her old bad habits, namely not eating. She's down to 95 pounds, only ten pounds heavier than her scary looking lowest point. Also back to bad habits: Brit Brit. She's back on the sauce, but still not doing drugs, though some fear that Britney's cocktail swilling might lead back down the road to cocaine corner. Also: there's some sidebar saying that Britney's boozing is causing her to have acne. WTF? Did a boob job come between George Clooney and Sarah Larson? Apparently Larson got her tatas done in May, and George wasn't happy about it. Sarah, however, is so thrilled with her new bod that she is considering posing for Playboy. Sigh.
Grade: F+ (second degree sunburn)
OK!
Aw, Shiloh is excited about Angelina's new babies! Apparently SO excited that OK! felt the need to devote four pages to the minutia of Shiloh's very existence. She has "pull-up diapers and tells Mom and Dad when she has to go to the bathroom"! She is learning to sleep alone! She puts her hands on Angie's stomach to feel the twins kick! Um, just like ANY OTHER TWO-YEAR-OLD EVER IN THE HISTORY OF LIFE. Brad Pitt might be making babies these days, but according to a "friend" of John Mayer's, Brad doesn't stack up to John in the sack. John is "Not just good, but sensational" at the sex." Jen is so appreciative that she's started glowing and wearing dresses. Or something like that. Mutiny in The Hills! Lauren Conrad and Audrina Patridge are brawling. There's a photo shoot with Audrina at her pool house, behind the main house where Lauren and Lo live, and apparently L.C. was pissed about it. "She was very, very mad." Audrina says. "She said it's her house. But this is my room…No she thinks I'm sneaky and shady for doing this photo shoot, yet she and her team knew about it." Dramz!
Grade: F (boob sweat on a date)
Life & Style
Katie is Tom's Prisoner. Again. Katie went to New York for four days to rehearse for her new play, All My Sons, and she never went anywhere but the hotel and the theater. She looked annoyed at a party, according to an "insider" and it's because she feels suffocated. Is John Mayer ready to be a dad? Life & Style ponders. Jen started talking about a friend's fertility treatment over dinner and John "swiftly" changed the subject. "This spinach is awesome…It's very garlicky," Mayer reportedly said. Heh. Maybe that's why Jennifer Aniston has been feuding with He's Just Not That Into You co-star, Jennifer Connelly. The cast of the film, which includes Drew Barrymore and Ginnifer Goodwin, got together for a Marie Claire photoshoot, and Aniston threatened to pull out if Connelly was included. Janet Jackson looks to be "up 20 pounds" since October, and she needs to lose weight before her Rock Wichu tour in September. She plans to eat healthier and exercise more and blah blah blah.

Grade: F- (heatstroke)

Here's what we learned last night about Brad. He grew up as a rich kid in Atlanta. Then his parents got divorced and he had to move with his mom and brothers to a trailer in Texas. Then he worked in the oil fields for ten years. Then he and his brothers opened up a bar. Now he is a millionaire. Or, as he himself puts it, he "has a little money in the bank." (Aw! And modest too!) Somehow, the trauma of growing up lower-middle class like the rest of America made him into a sweet, kind, hot soul who just wants "to be that perfect husband." The kind that bathes (We saw a clip of him, waist-up, in the shower.) And jogs (We saw a clip of him jogging, shirt off.) And wears boxer briefs. (You get the idea.) Lastly, and perhaps most tellingly, Brad has a twin brother. Named Chad. (You can see where that is going too.)

As for the ladies, there were 25 of them, 10 of whom were booted off by the end of the episode. We're not saying they're dumb, but pretty much all we heard come out of any of their mouths was "OMG! He is SO hot!". They also giggled. A lot. Idiotically. Like Jenni, whose winning formula of high-pitched giggle and career as some sort of dancer/cheerleader caught Brad's eye the second she disembarked from the limousine and won her the greatly-coveted "First Impression" rose. ("I'm from Kansas!" she said. "Then we'll get along real fine," he said.) There was also Lindsay, a tall, blonde, and thin "model" from Michigan who found out that Brad was from Texas and burst out with "Yellow Rose of Texas" but who couldn't sing a lick; and Mallory, a nanny from Hawaii who slunk around the house clad in nothing but a bikini. Not surprisingly, all three of those women made the cut.

Those who didn't make the cut? Morgan, a graduate student who pulled Brad aside for a little one-on-one... to show him that she has webbed feet; Juli ("With no 'e' at the end!" she boasted), a law student who showed Brad how she can turn herself into a human pretzel; Melissa, a party planner who got drunk as a skunk, slurred her words, failed to make a coherent sentence, and lost one of her bra-stuffing silicon chicken cutlets over the course of the evening; and basically every minority woman on the show, other than Jade, who is probably half-Caucasian anyway and managed to hold on for another week.

But frankly we're pulling for Kristy. She's the beautiful, brunette acupuncturist. Given that our acupuncturist is without fail the most spiritually and emotionally evolved person we know, we're willing to generalize and assume that everybody in the profession is the same. At the very least, it's about time that Chinese medicine made it to primetime!

The Bachelor [ABC]

• A musical about the life and times of Clay Aiken and his obsessive fans is no longer bound for Broadway. [TMZ]
  
• Next time someone tells you you're rude for yawning at them, correct them and explain that you're actually empathizing. [News.com.au]
  
• Raise the legal drinking age in England? Fuck no! [BBC]
  
• New Jersey Buddhists have released animals bought in NYC's Chinatown into the wilds of New Jersey, hoping they reach their "karmic potential." Run, Thumper, run! [MSNBC]

• Dude, we just hate it when baby bibs are contaminated with lead, don't you? We aren't going to say it, but they're made in China. [CNN]
• What? The Bush administration is going to label another group of Arab / Middle Eastern folk terrorists? Shocking. [NYT]
• So many fantasies, coming true: Barack Obama. To appear on The Tyra Banks Show. Please God let Ms. J show up for that one to give our boy Barry O some runway stomping tips! [ABC News]
• Wow. Shocking. Another couple formed from The Bachelor call of their engagement. [People]

Earlier: Crush Of The Day: Craig Ferguson
Related: The Bachelor