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New York, 3:14 AM
Thu Dec 10
65 posts in the last 24 hours

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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of Aesop's Foibles. YES. Aesop's Foibles. YES.
    12/20/08

    In reply to This Week We Were Tired Of Tyra, Elisabeth And Meme
    I will never get a star. I'm sure of it. Even though I came up with a clever name and I'm here all day, six days out of seven. It saddens me to know I'll never reach the heights of stardom some of you have. BUT!! Don't any of you make the mistake of thinking I'm going to give up. I WILL NEVER CAPITULATE TO YOU POPULAR BISHES. NEVER. I will continue to hone my skills and even though I'll never attain superstar status, YOU WILL ALL CONTINUE TO BE SUBJECTED TO MY RAMBLING, NON-PARAGRAPHED COMMENTS AND THE FACT THAT I DON'T HAVE AN AVATAR BECAUSE I DO NOT KNOW HOW TO MAKE ONE. So there. All you lovely, intelligent bishes can, in the immortal words of BHB, SUCK IT. Love yall!!
     Reply
    Aesop's Foibles. YES. was starred Aesop's Foibles. YES. was unstarred
    Image of SisterMaryMartha SisterMaryMartha
    12/19/08

    In reply to This Week We Were Tired Of Tyra, Elisabeth And Meme
    ALSO, ABBYNORMAL. I LOVE YOU AND YOUR NAME. WHY ARE YOU CHANGING IT?
     Reply
    SisterMaryMartha was starred SisterMaryMartha was unstarred
    Image of I, Zombie Normal I, Zombie Normal
    12/19/08

    @SisterMaryMartha: Thanks, doll! I've had a rough couple of weeks, and feel like a zombie lately. I MEAN I'VE HAD A ROUGH COUPLE OF WEEKS.... I quit drinking 276 days ago, and am having a bad spell of the old urges and such.


    I'm pretty sure I won't stay a zombie, as Bill Pullman got better in Serpent and the Rainbow, right? And they buried him, so I'm way ahead of the game. I WILL SURVIVE TO EAT COOKIES ANOTHER DAY!!

     Reply
    I, Zombie Normal was starred I, Zombie Normal was unstarred
    Image of Ascendo_tuum Ascendo_tuum
    12/19/08

    @The Zombie Commenter Formerly Known as AbbyNormal: Way to stay positive! This too shall pass!
     Reply
    Ascendo_tuum was starred Ascendo_tuum was unstarred
    Image of SisterMaryMartha SisterMaryMartha
    12/19/08

    In reply to This Week We Were Tired Of Tyra, Elisabeth And Meme
    TEXAS CRUDE AND ANDBEGOOOOOORRAH HAVE BEEN ESPECIALLY SILENT. I MISS THEIR WICKED SELVES.


    HAPPY HOLIDAYS, Y'ALL.

     Reply
    SisterMaryMartha was starred SisterMaryMartha was unstarred
    Image of I, Zombie Normal I, Zombie Normal
    12/19/08

    In reply to This Week We Were Tired Of Tyra, Elisabeth And Meme
    I'D LIKE TO GIVE A FRIDAY ALL CAPS SHOUTOUT TO MORNINGGLORIA, BABYJANE, TSCHEESE, BRUTALLYHONESTBABES, KRUSCHEV, SISTERMARYMARTHA, PILGRIM SOUL, JESSICA HUSSEIN LOVEJOY, HATEPAPERDOLL, INEFFABLEME, BADMUTHA, ANDBEGGORAH, HORTENSE, AND ALL Y'ALL-- I KNOW I'M FORGETTING SOME, BUT Y'ALL FUCKING DYKE FEMINAZI BONERKILLERS MAKE ME LAUGH EVERYDAY, AND I THANK Y'ALL SO MUCH FOR LIFTING MY SPIRITS SO OFTEN.


    LEG HUGS, CHEESE PLATES, PURPLE DRANK, YOUR WORLD VIEW, FOR THE FUCK OF SHIT, AND NOM NOM NOM, BISHES!

     Reply
    I, Zombie Normal was starred I, Zombie Normal was unstarred
    Image of PilgrimSoul PilgrimSoul
    12/19/08

    @The Zombie Commenter Formerly Known as AbbyNormal: I DON'T NORMALLY DO THIS CAPS THING BUT THANKS! RIGHT BACK ATCHA *FINGER GUNS*
     Reply
    PilgrimSoul was starred PilgrimSoul was unstarred
    Image of SisterMaryMartha SisterMaryMartha
    12/19/08

    @The Zombie Commenter Formerly Known as AbbyNormal:

    I'M LATE FOR YOUR JOY, BUT THANK YOU! WORK HAS BEEN A REAL BITCH, I WOULD LOVE TO CUT HER.
     Reply
    SisterMaryMartha was starred SisterMaryMartha was unstarred
    Image of Raspberry Swirly Raspberry Swirly
    12/19/08

    In reply to This Week We Were Tired Of Tyra, Elisabeth And Meme
    The learning how to bump it thing immediately brought back 90s memories of really, really bad dances, bike shorts as actual fashion even for men, and MC Hammer. Pumps and a bump indeed.
     Reply
    Raspberry Swirly was starred Raspberry Swirly was unstarred
    Image of sportz.star sportz.star
    12/19/08

    In reply to This Week We Were Tired Of Tyra, Elisabeth And Meme
    Thanks goodness for those reality tv moments. It's been a crap week. Time for a good weekend!
     Reply
    sportz.star was starred sportz.star was unstarred
    Image of Rose.Selavy.Needs.A.Drink Rose.Selavy.Needs.A.Drink
    12/19/08

    In reply to This Week We Were Tired Of Tyra, Elisabeth And Meme
    This asinine week ended on a slick and slippery goose shit note.


    Bring on 2009. Please.

     Reply
    Rose.Selavy.Needs.A.Drink was starred Rose.Selavy.Needs.A.Drink was unstarred
    Image of TheFormerJuneBronson TheFormerJuneBronson
    12/19/08

    @Rose.Selavy.Needs.A.Drink: Amen. Aside from Obama being elected, 2008 has not worked for me at all. I'm more than ready to move on.
     Reply
    TheFormerJuneBronson was starred TheFormerJuneBronson was unstarred
    Image of Ascendo_tuum Ascendo_tuum
    12/19/08

    @Rose.Selavy.Needs.A.Drink: Me three. This has been a shitty year of epic proportions for me. *leg hugs all around*
     Reply
    Ascendo_tuum was starred Ascendo_tuum was unstarred
    Image of Penny Penny
    12/19/08

    In reply to This Week We Were Tired Of Tyra, Elisabeth And Meme
    I noticed that I hit 600 followers this weekend. I feel like a cult leader.


    Honestly, though, perhaps I need a new hobby......

     Reply
    Penny was starred Penny was unstarred
    Image of Penny Penny
    12/19/08

    @Penny Plastic (Archetype): Um, cult leader in reference to the term "followers," not an insinuation that I could convince hundreds of people to bathe with an electric appliance, or something.


    I need it to be the weekend.

     Reply
    Penny was starred Penny was unstarred
    Image of ceejeemcbeegee is not here ceejeemcbeegee is not here
    12/19/08

    @Penny Plastic (Archetype): I'd follow you anywhere!


    Your comment made me check mine.... 200+ friends and 350+ followers! Really? When did that happen?


    An more importantly, which ones are single guys and WHY HAVENT ANY OF YOU CALLED ME?!?!?

     Reply
    ceejeemcbeegee is not here was starred ceejeemcbeegee is not here was unstarred
    Image of PilgrimSoul PilgrimSoul
    12/19/08

    @Penny Plastic (Archetype): yep, I've been hitting the old Jezebel sauce way too much lately myself.
     Reply
    PilgrimSoul was starred PilgrimSoul was unstarred
    Image of Raspberry Swirly Raspberry Swirly
    12/19/08

    @Penny Plastic (Archetype): 600? Good grief. You should be presented with a trophy. Or a commemorative pen.
     Reply
    Raspberry Swirly was starred Raspberry Swirly was unstarred
    Image of PilgrimSoul PilgrimSoul
    12/19/08

    @Penny Plastic (Archetype): also, I'd just like to say that I feel tyrranized by your merciless rule. stop oppressing my shit, dudette.
     Reply
    PilgrimSoul was starred PilgrimSoul was unstarred
    Image of Scout Scout
    12/19/08

    @ceejeemcbeegee: I'm glad that I need not worry about an exhorbitant number of "followers" as it would be too much of a burden. This is why I try and put up posts which basically contain loads of crap, judgement, hypocrisy and a feigned loathing for all things everyone champions.


    given that I have under 20 followers, it appears I'm doing a good job!

     Reply
    Scout was starred Scout was unstarred
    Image of HeinzDoofenshmirtz HeinzDoofenshmirtz
    12/19/08

    @ceejeemcbeegee: Why don't you have a star next to your name?
     Reply
    HeinzDoofenshmirtz was starred HeinzDoofenshmirtz was unstarred
    Image of Penny Penny
    12/19/08

    @PilgrimSoul: Yeah, you know I'm the pushiest person on the Interwebs.


    Really, though. I feel like I should be thinking "higher must be better, right??" but I just feel kind of sad that I spend so much time here. My poor boyfriend.


    Also, I hate this time of the night. All the east coasters are checked out and it's the end of my day so my focus is nonexistent.

     Reply
    Penny was starred Penny was unstarred
    Image of PilgrimSoul PilgrimSoul
    12/19/08

    @Penny Plastic (Archetype): I am usually still at work.
     Reply
    PilgrimSoul was starred PilgrimSoul was unstarred
    Image of PilgrimSoul PilgrimSoul
    12/19/08

    @ceejeemcbeegee: yeah, hey, where's your star???
     Reply
    PilgrimSoul was starred PilgrimSoul was unstarred
    Image of sportz.star sportz.star
    12/19/08

    @Scout: Ah, yes, apparently the self-serving thoughts in my head that randomly tumble out are also not inspiring "followers."


    But, stars, I thought they came from having followers - - ceejeemcbeegee, why don't you have one?

     Reply
    sportz.star was starred sportz.star was unstarred
    Image of Penny Penny
    12/19/08

    @ceejeemcbeegee: Hey Cee, did you break a Jez rule or some such thing? YOUR STAR IS GONE OMG WTF !?!?!


    I don't have it, I swear.

     Reply
    Penny was starred Penny was unstarred
    Image of tscheese tscheese
    12/19/08

    @Penny Plastic (Archetype): I was at 666 for awhile this week, and it made me feel tingly.
     Reply
    tscheese was starred tscheese was unstarred
    Image of PilgrimSoul PilgrimSoul
    12/19/08

    @Penny Plastic (Archetype): whatever, crazy cultist.
     Reply
    PilgrimSoul was starred PilgrimSoul was unstarred
    Image of Scout Scout
    12/19/08

    @sportz.star: I just added to your follower list for the hell of it
     Reply
    Scout was starred Scout was unstarred
    Image of Penny Penny
    12/19/08

    @tscheese: See, I feel anxious. So anxious that I can't even eat this red velvet cupcake sitting in front of me. And I haven't eaten all day.
     Reply
    Penny was starred Penny was unstarred
    Image of Mafalda para Presidente Mafalda para Presidente
    12/19/08

    @ceejeemcbeegee: If you have 250+ followers...why you have no star?
     Reply
    Mafalda para Presidente was starred Mafalda para Presidente was unstarred
    Image of DangerMouse DangerMouse
    12/19/08

    @PilgrimSoul: Oh jebus, I was saying today that I don't know what the mystery star amount is (because it is not 25), but if it's more than 350, I AM NEVER GOING TO GET THERE.


    Again, I haz a sad. But maybe I can STEAL one. Mwahahahaha! Archetype, look out!

     Reply
    DangerMouse was starred DangerMouse was unstarred
    Image of Cesybabe or Nirvanah Crane Cesybabe or Nirvanah Crane
    12/19/08

    @DangerMouse (was ejc....): I believe the magic number is 40, but its not automatic on 40, so is at editor and Hortense discretion. Man, I'm so close too!
     Reply
    Cesybabe or Nirvanah Crane was starred Cesybabe or Nirvanah Crane was unstarred
    Image of Rose.Selavy.Needs.A.Drink Rose.Selavy.Needs.A.Drink
    12/19/08

    @Penny Plastic (Archetype): Yes, you need a new hobby.
     Reply
    Rose.Selavy.Needs.A.Drink was starred Rose.Selavy.Needs.A.Drink was unstarred
    Image of Penny Penny
    12/19/08

    @Rose.Selavy.Needs.A.Drink: I'm looking, trust me.
     Reply
    Penny was starred Penny was unstarred
    Image of Ulookinatmyjunk, JOC Ulookinatmyjunk, JOC
    12/19/08

    @Penny Plastic (Archetype): Alright, lookie here, party people. I'm stuck at 94...this has been a slow follower week for me. But I ain't too proud to beg or offer sexual favors to any of you mofos willing to blast me off into the 100s. I'm serious, like, computer b.j.'s are not out of the question. I'll leg hug all you bitches and make you apple pie afterwards, no shit. I've tried appealing to your sympathy, apathy, anger, and mutual love for all things Golden Girls and hate for all things Hasselbeck. And I've stalled, people. I've hit the wall right before my desired destination. Put me over the top, people. I can't do it without you. I'm the candidate for change...but I ain't afraid to spend dollars. I'll pay you for this election to the land of hundredaires. But I need your commitment people, don't take my favors than frenemy me next week.


    I am not beyond this and you are not above this...so, what's your price:


     Reply
    Ulookinatmyjunk, JOC was starred Ulookinatmyjunk, JOC was unstarred
    Image of Ascendo_tuum Ascendo_tuum
    12/19/08

    @Penny Plastic (Archetype): What about rubber ducky vibrators?
     Reply
    Ascendo_tuum was starred Ascendo_tuum was unstarred
    Image of Ascendo_tuum Ascendo_tuum
    12/19/08

    @Penny Plastic (Archetype): @Scout: I didn't think I would have any followers, then I checked and I have FOUR! Woohoo!
     Reply
    Ascendo_tuum was starred Ascendo_tuum was unstarred
    Image of Tara Incognita Tara Incognita
    12/20/08

    @Ulookinatmyjunk!?!: See my above requirements for Cesybabe.
     Reply
    Tara Incognita was starred Tara Incognita was unstarred
    Image of Ulookinatmyjunk, JOC Ulookinatmyjunk, JOC
    12/20/08

    @Tara Incognita: YES!!! YES!!! I'm at 99 (pre-climactic)....C'mon people!!!


    Make me ME your new best friend. You don't even have to follow my comments. Trust me, they're not always that awesome anyway...just one more.

     Reply
    Ulookinatmyjunk, JOC was starred Ulookinatmyjunk, JOC was unstarred
    Image of PennyArcadia PennyArcadia
    12/12/08

    In reply to This Week We Had A Gastric Bypass
    I nearly forgot: thanks for all, Jessica, and good luck at your new job! I found your posts always interesting, and I guess now I'll have another site to bookmark.
     Reply
    PennyArcadia was starred PennyArcadia was unstarred
    Image of dianersb was bit by a zombie dianersb was bit by a zombie
    12/12/08

    @PennyArcadia: WHAT?!?!? I seemed to have missed something
     Reply
    dianersb was bit by a zombie was starred dianersb was bit by a zombie was unstarred
    Image of Crabby Cakes Crabby Cakes
    12/12/08

    @dianersb: There was a post yesterday, Jessica is leaving at the end of the year for the Salon lady blog. :(
     Reply
    Crabby Cakes was starred Crabby Cakes was unstarred
    Image of dianersb was bit by a zombie dianersb was bit by a zombie
    12/13/08

    @Crabby Cakes wants some Dance Biscuits.: booooooo. I love me some Jessica. Le sigh. The days I can't pay attention due to stupid work.
     Reply
    dianersb was bit by a zombie was starred dianersb was bit by a zombie was unstarred
    Image of Jesscooks Jesscooks
    12/12/08

    In reply to This Week We Had A Gastric Bypass
    Um, did they tell you guys to write less, too?


    As PennyArcadia said, there just doesn't seem to be much to read, even in the expanded view. And what do we have to write about - or, really, why even come to the site, if you aren't bringing teh funneh anymore?


    I mean, it's not that big of a deal, but it just seems more pic/link, less commentary/wit than before the change.

     Reply
    Jesscooks was starred Jesscooks was unstarred
    Image of ceejeemcbeegee is not here ceejeemcbeegee is not here
    12/12/08

    @Jesscooks: Of course the posts would be smaller... Jez's stomach is too small for bigger ones.
     Reply
    ceejeemcbeegee is not here was starred ceejeemcbeegee is not here was unstarred
    Image of Kali Mama Kali Mama
    12/13/08

    @Jesscooks: Also because like half the staff was let go and the other half in part time, ergo less posts.
     Reply
    Kali Mama was starred Kali Mama was unstarred
    Image of Penny_Esq Penny_Esq
    12/12/08

    In reply to This Week We Had A Gastric Bypass
    Um, so, question. What with Megan being part-time now, does that mean the absence of Crappy Hour and News Roundup is permanent? If so, BOO.
     Reply
    Penny_Esq was starred Penny_Esq was unstarred
    Image of Crabby Cakes Crabby Cakes
    12/12/08

    @Penny_Esq: I think Hortense said Megan had the day off, although I thought I saw some posts by her? Not sure...
     Reply
    Crabby Cakes was starred Crabby Cakes was unstarred
    Image of Anna Anna
    12/12/08

    @Penny_Esq: Megan had the last two days off
     Reply
    Anna was starred Anna was unstarred
    Image of Penny_Esq Penny_Esq
    12/12/08

    @Anna: Oh, excellent. She (and all the Jezebel writers who cater to our capricious whims) certainly deserve some vacay every once in awhile.
     Reply
    Penny_Esq was starred Penny_Esq was unstarred
    Image of dianersb was bit by a zombie dianersb was bit by a zombie
    12/12/08

    @Penny_Esq: Yeah, that's what I thought to myself earlier. If anyone deserves days off sometimes it's the lovely editors at jezebel who keep me occupied and out of trouble.
     Reply
    dianersb was bit by a zombie was starred dianersb was bit by a zombie was unstarred
    Image of MadFab MadFab
    12/12/08

    In reply to This Week We Had A Gastric Bypass
    I disapprove of Jezebel going on a diet in order to look lean 'n' mean in these hard scrabble times. Celebrate your larger, curvier, sexier bandwidth, yo!
     Reply
    MadFab was starred MadFab was unstarred
    Image of Brigit Brigit
    12/12/08

    In reply to This Week We Had A Gastric Bypass
    It's not worth fussing about but,

    1. Expanded view ftw.

    2. I want my PMs back!
     Reply
    Brigit was starred Brigit was unstarred
    Image of Johanna Weakley Johanna Weakley
    12/12/08

    In reply to This Week We Had A Gastric Bypass
    Just trying out the facebook feature thing. :)
     Reply
    Johanna Weakley was starred Johanna Weakley was unstarred
    Image of Khrushchev Khrushchev
    12/12/08

    @Johanna Weakley: Stop it! Don't encourage them!
     Reply
    Khrushchev was starred Khrushchev was unstarred
    Image of I, Zombie Normal I, Zombie Normal
    12/12/08

    @Johanna Weakley: @Khrushchev: So your whole (read: actual, for the most part) name shows up when you log in from Facebook? Hunh.
     Reply
    I, Zombie Normal was starred I, Zombie Normal was unstarred
    Image of Riesa Lirette Riesa Lirette
    12/12/08

    @Khrushchev: Hold on, you never know who might turn up as part of the unwashed masses. I've been lurking awhile and I always wanted to register, but the audition combined with my crushing fear of rejection caused me to keep my snarkyness to myself. I just wanna come out of the closet and be a Jezzie too.
     Reply
    Riesa Lirette was starred Riesa Lirette was unstarred
    Image of Crabby Cakes Crabby Cakes
    12/12/08

    @Riesa Lirette: You know what? We were all new once. Fear not the rejection! And welcome your snarkiness!
     Reply
    Crabby Cakes was starred Crabby Cakes was unstarred
    Image of dianersb was bit by a zombie dianersb was bit by a zombie
    12/13/08

    @Riesa Lirette: It's all right. The audition phase isn't bad at all. I made it through with, what I recall, was not a witty, urbane or insightful comment. I believe it was something along the lines of "what about her shoes?!!?!"


    Anyway, my (rather drunken) point is that the ladies here are not as intimidating as they seem. I love each and every one of them.

     Reply
    dianersb was bit by a zombie was starred dianersb was bit by a zombie was unstarred
    Image of vuvu vuvu
    12/12/08

    In reply to This Week We Had A Gastric Bypass
    doesn't seem to work so well with firefox, or maybe it's just me
     Reply
    vuvu was starred vuvu was unstarred
    Image of Brigit Brigit
    12/12/08

    @vuvu: Nah, I also have ff and it sometimes acts all glitchy.
     Reply
    Brigit was starred Brigit was unstarred
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